PET vMiV NUlSANCtlP
OF THfc IRST
I
PIANOS. MADE.
JOCKO IN DISREPUTE WITH THE
WgVr QRK . HEALTH BOARD.
I iiurtiB BUtery f an Old Kttaieal
" Klronieul Tllat Hm Travels.
In a manic store on Third street, b-(
tween Marion and Columbia, there is anj
old piano which attracts much attention.. -
,s The old. miixical instrument i? of the i
npright style and is in "a fair state of i
I WAR AND AERIAL SHIPS.
' POSSIBILITIES -REGARDING " FUTURE
flying .MACHINES.
.:.Jt r -
Ttg"rPa of Mn. Kufnu't Clotltm-
ttM. pik Pott; on i of kjriibt rrt i preservation, tnougn iris nearly one nun-
Miik. .,. .area rears oia ... is nas ,K.e,vooiini iui
white keys for the- regular notes,
' ' f"tor"twa year now Jocko has been
faring things pretty much' his own way '
an a back: yard in East Fourth-street.
Bnt at last he has run up against a snag.
Doubtless if . Jocko had been content
-with his own, back. yard. and . had not
jwne about prowling for new back yards'
to conquer, his name today would .not
keen the blotter' of the health board's
. tag boo..- At the, Weekly meeting 01. toe
' board it will be decided whether he mav
keep ' up'' his nomadic proclivities nn-'
molested ' or whether in the future he is
to be chained 't6 a ring in the area steps.'
Jocko is the pet monkey of Josef Hoff
mann, 'who' does a brisk business. in the
TiMMiient at 87 East Fourth street. A
mm. captain, who had come home from a
-voyage to South America, for cocoanuts.
brought back Jocko with him. and gave
the animal to Mr. Hoffmann. If Jocko
had stuck his long, sharp claws into Mr.
Hoffman's heart he couldn't have secured
a deeper hold oil that portion of the lat
ter' anatomy than he did on the first
day of his installment in the basement
is East Fourth street. ,
Every twenty-four hours which have
passed since then- have only soldered
, oooro firmly the ties between the monkey
4md his master. So fond, indeed, has
his owner become of the curious little
affirm that he has never had the heart.
to correct him in any way. The result
was the usual one. Jocko was spoiled -
JOCKO AND THE CLOTHR8LJNE. -'
80 one day. as Jocko was sitting rami
.gating in the back yard, with a leg
swung about " the trellis and his tail
wound around the grape vine, he spied
Mrs. Kaafman. of the third floor, back
4taaging her washing out to dry.
Mrs. Kaufman closed the window.
' leaving her linen, which she bad got ap
at ft o'clock to wash, hanging in the sun.
Jocko waited a whole minute after he
beard the sasb bang.- Then, with a cat-.
. high back fence, scampered up the fire
escape, of an adjoining building, made a
well calculated leap of three feet and
tended on the nearest point of vantage
. x the taut ropes or Mrs. tLaurman s
. . , 1 : .
rWUK8Uim
take a tightrope walker, jocko tripped.
along the line. He put up one paw to
bis whisker, just as the real performer
-"does when he smirks and throws the in
4mi table kiss to theaudience.. Then
Jocko began his aerial feats in earnest.
When Mrs. Kaufman went to haul in
' her lines that evening she stood as one
amazed. Her stockings " strewed the
ja 1 t . ui .1 . n 1 .. . m
noonu uoiuw una tuo laiieu lonvra ui
where they were not torn in places, were
tracked in a pattern in which the chief
figure was the imprint of a muddy paw.
Some. of her linen was actually missing.
Mrs. Kaufman had to get up early the
next morning again, pull but her thread
and needle, and, after mending for al
most an hour, do her whole wash over.
Bat Jocko never ran' amuck among
Mrs. Kaufman's wash any more. He
had experienced a new sensation, and
,' having once satisfied himself with that
he began to cast about for fresh fields
and pastures new. Of course, if he
wanted to make use of Mrs. Kaufman's
er any other person's convenient lines.
Jocko never hesitated to use them as a
public thoroughfare. But as a diversion.
clotheslines had lost their seductive
charm g for the monkey.
' - THE HATTER PROTESTS.
80 while looking about another morn
. ing for something "new and strange he
clambered ap on to the roof of the ex
tension built out from a hat store on the
Bowery 'The skylight . was open and
Jocko began dropping odd bits which he
picked up off the roof, down into the
room "below His Simian Majesty was
cared away.
Then Jocko's instinctive feeling of dis
like for the Hyman family asserted itself.
The next day and the next Jocko quietly
perched' himself on the rim of the sky
light over the extension of the hatter
and began picking away the pntty about
"the panes. - But Jocko had not progressed
far in his operations before he was found
at. Then Sir. Hyman s patience gave
threatened with a leak. He was not as
complacent as his neighbor, Mrs. Kauf
man, who satisfied her grievance by
shouting out vengeance from her back
windows upon the' monkey. The latter
went right down to the board of health
and lodged a complaint against . Mr.
Hoffmann's pet. ..' " .
One of Jocko's tricks'is to go out early
. in the morning ' and steal the pennies
which are placed in milk-pitchers, and
another is to gather up letters which the
postman leaves under the basement gates
near the monkey's home; Whether he
views the Italian at the corner with 'in
stinctive hatred or as a natural friend it
is impossible to say. but sure it is that
' 'when Jocko wants a peanut or a fig he
makes no scruple of bagging one from
niug ways is to stick his snout into any
inviting bottle of milk or aisn or pua
ding that is set out of a back window to
cool, and then make his escape with his
-Stomach full of the delicacy.
""' Pending the result of the inquiry Mr.
.RntTtniinn ia t Ktlo. anTVinB fflT fool1 tVirt
health board .may .compel him to im-
nnson his dear Jocko. But Jocko runs
. about as UbMal with no fear -for ; conse
onences at all. One shake of his right
naW against his left whisker "filed" the
sanitary inspector. ' And if that was not
sufficient Jocko knows enough to ques
tion the right of the- health board to in
terfere in his case at alL New York
World. - '
Eeh Amnrcra, "WhereT" ' -
. 'Mother, don't the angels wear any
dothesT v
-No, darling." .'.
"Then where do they put their pocky
Tttankiee?" London Judy.
and
black keys for :the sharps and flats, j-ust
like the .'pianos of today. These, when
deftly touched, cause the ancient instrur
ment to discourse most eloquently.
No one could tell its great age by hear
ing it played onv : Its tones are still har
motiious and tuneful, though, Of course,
it cannot .be compared with .the .host
pianos of today, when volume or modula
tion of : tone is considered. - - Its front .is
Ornamented " With;, wooden scrollwork,
behind which is a crimson cloth of tine
textnre The frame on which the strings
are stretched is of wood, while the frame
of the ' modern
double row of
Bow 'Mt . Kavie iad MiiWi , Land
I rorttiflefttions Mirht B Kanderad fjac
i .' Ism -Anttnlt.T of" Ui Ida of Flyiac.
WlolEsale' ni Eetan Dnajsts.
-PKAIJCR8 IN-
gM Hffbftmpii of ta Avcie'ntft .'
Regarding the rate of propulsion of the
future flying machine, Professor J. Elf-j
teth Watkins, the distinguished mecham- ,
cal expert, declares that it simply depends
upon' the size of the propeller used and
the rate at which the fans are revolved.
In his opinion the old theory that the at- 1
mosphere was too tenuous a medium for
a propeller to act upon has been demon? 1
strated to be nonsense. Sufficient resist
ance is offered by it to render possible an
enormous speed, so that it would not be
too much to surmise that a properly con
structed air ship' might - accomplish the
piano .is . of iron. The t distance between Chicago and New York
keys is followed to this i within an hour's time. '.--.".
day, and the interior construction . is t Necessarily, however, there would be a
much the same as in vogue at present.. " limit to rapidity of flight, inasmuch as a
The" fact that the ancient instrument ! propeller, ceases to propel arter a certain
is in such a good state of preservation is f number of revolutions per second has
high tribute to the old time piano! been reached. It is open to any one 8 ob-
makera. They built their instruments to I starvation that a vessel's propeller, oper-
last. . This is said not to be the case with j ating in the water, often revolves much
many of the present piano manufacturers. faster when the craft is moving slowly
The superannuated instrnuient has an than when it is going last. , ,..
interesting history. The Nineteenth! Attention was canea Dy jar. iiazen to
Century had counted off but three years the tremendous revolution which the ia-
1 . 1 . .. 1 1 . l ' A 1 ,.e . ... .... 1 ..l.: 1
wnen it was Dougat oy an cjugiisn geu- !. wuum iiuu vi piw.uuu cut cujn yvuuiu
tleman for his family of the makers, J. i work in the methods of offense and de-
& J. Uopkinson, of Regent. street, Lou- i fense in war Fortifications, on which
don. It was made m the year 1802 and i it is suggested that Uncle Sam shall ex-
Fine; Imported, Key West and Domestic
sold in 1803. It passed as an heirloom
from one member of the family to an
other until it came into the possession of
branch that left London for America
in the" year 1864.' . The voyage was made
in the celebrated ship Robert Lowe.
During the voyage a heavy gale was en
countered, "and the piano was washed
overboard with other things,' but. was
finally fished out of the briny ocean. , ; -
The family .. that brought the instru
ment to America settled at Victoria. B.
C, and they passed away one by one
until only two sisters were left : Finally
one of theee died and the other became
insane with grief. ' Then it became nec
essary to administer on the estate of the
sisters, and the 'piano was sold by order
of the probate ' court. The instrument
then fell into the hands of a gentleman
named Johnson, who resided in Victo
ria. ' ' , , '".:''!. - "".
In 1869 Mr. Johnson sold the instru
ment to a gentleman who had it in his
possession for the past twenty-two years. J
Poring that period it has been at Port
LudJoW-. Olympia, Whidby. Island and
Seattle. Once it was in a fire, in which
$8,000 damage was done, and it, was
saved. It was moved from Seattle to
Victoria twice. Finally the last owner
traded it off for an instrument of mod
ern .make,, giving: good, boot. Seattle
Telegraph. ' AJ "
Ltt "r'anhlon in Clothe and Children.
The small woman who fervently
prayed that there might be no "best
clothes m heaven certainly ought not
to be unhappy now, for even the best
clothes are simple, and are made so that-
she can move and be happy in them.
Silks, satins, laces and flummery on chil-.
dren are oiily evidences of the folly of
their mothers, for the . wisest aud
wealthiest women dress their children
in the simplest and plainest manner.
You see, babies who quote Shakespeare
at five, or. who are looking for microbes
at seven, are counted bad form, while
those who dig in the sands for precious
stones, or build houses that are washed
away by the incoming waves, are th
ones who are going to be bealthy and
wise. New York Sun. ;
PAINT
Now is the time to ,iai ut your house
and ijyou wish to get the bent: quality
and a fine color us the . . . ;. ' . ;i:'; :,. :.
Sliprwiiu Williams Co.s Faint
, ' For those' wishing to see the quality
and color of the above paint we call their
attention to the residence of K'Ll Brooks,
Judge Bennett. Smith' French and others
painted by Pan! Kreft. '..
bnipes & Kinorslv are nc'uts for the
ab5Taint for The TMNe. pr7 ; V ,
George
A luji King.
IV was a mere
puppet of a
pend . $30,000,000 as soon as possible,
would be of little use against flying ma
chines that could drop dynamite and
other . explosives from aloft. Likewise
ships of war, however . heavily armored,
would be at the mercy of hostile aerial
navigators. ' . ' ' . .'.
- COSTLY OtJN-8 KENDEKED U&BIJESS.
: In such a case batteries of a descrip
tion : altogether new would have to be
devised for shooting vertically, and the
general defending a position on terra
firma would ' be obliged to assail the
winged . foe with volleys of bombs di
rected upward, as one would shoot
ducks on the wing. Should such a state
of affairs come to pass, it seems likely
that the conflicts of the future between
nations will have to be fought out in the
air between squadrons of flying men-of-war.
About that time oue would imag
ine, it would be considered that the
period had arrived, so long looked for
by military thinkers, when there could
be no more fighting because' it would be
too vastly destructive.
Having -achieved the conquest of. the
waters,, it is natural that- man . Should
likewise desire, the mastery of. .the air,
and thus in all ages the human race has
been-' ambitious to fly'. - The earliest at
tempt in this direction recorded by tra
dition is the. mythical account of Dae
dalus, who, having constructed the cele
brated labyrinth for Minos, king pf
Crete, was so unfortunate as to offend
that, monarch, and being imprisoned,
escaped .with the aid of wings, made of
feathers cemented with wax.
Another ancient story of Archytas, of
Tarentum,' who -constructed' a wooden
pigeon that had power to fly, so nicely
was it balanced by weight and put to
motion by inclosed air. If there is any
truth in the account, it seems probable
that Archytas was a . fakir and worked
his bird with a string, as is done on the
stage. The ancients, generally speak
ing, made no attempts in the direction
of aeronautic, believing that the power
of flight could only appertain to the
most powerful gods. '
j. , OLD SCHEMES' FOB FLYING. '
Four centuries ago an ingenious' gen
tleman named Lanretus Lauras pub
lished a statement to . the effect that
swan's eggs filled with quicksilver, when
exposed to the sun, would ascend in the
1
TriB Dados cnroniciG
is here and has come to, stay. It hopes
to win its way, to public s favor by ener
gy, industry and merit; and to this end
we. ask that you give, it a fair trial, and
11 satisfied' with: its course a generous
support' ''"!.'.. ;V ) , ' ; "'
The
Daily
four paes of six columns each, will be'
issued feverjrvening, except Sunday,;
and will be delivered in the city, or sent
by mail for the moderate sum of fifty
cents a month'-r
Its
Obi
eets
tRT E. 1. WlST8 Kervf. abb Rkain Tbkat
HKN'T, a Kaaranteed BTHX'Irii: for Hysteria, DizvA
neK, ouTulBionn, Fits, Nervous Neuralgia,
Healache, Nervous Prostrution caused byhe use
of alcohol or tobacco. Wakefulness. Mental te-J
pressiou, sunemnK 01 me urain, resulting in inn
sanity aim leaning to misery, aecay ana aeatn,
Premature Old Age, Barrenness, Ixms of Power1
in either sex, Involuntary Tsses and 8permat
orrUum caused by over exertion of tbe brain, self
abuse or over indulgence. Each box contains
one month's treatment. $1.00 a box, or six boxes
for fo.00, sent by mail prepaid on receipt of price.
- -.WE GUARANTEE SIX BOXES
To cure any case. With each order received by
us for six boxes, accompanied by $5.00, we will
send the purchaser our written, guarantee to re
fund the money if the treatment does not effect
a cure.. Guarantees issued only by
KLAKELEY HOUGHTON.
" . Prescription IrUKC-sts.
i:&Sroial8t. ; ' The Dalles, Or.
. I. C. JaldlELEH,
'.". '!' V DEALER IN-: .. . - .'
SCfOOL HOOKS; ;'
, STATIONARY,
ORGANS , " '
V: pianos, ', y: ' .-" - x:
V " - ' watches;
... .-. JEWELRY.
i , Cor. Third and Washington fits.
will be to advertise the resources of the
city; and adjacent country, to assist in
developing our industries, in extending
and opening up. new channels for our
trade, m securing an open river, and in
helping THE BAIiLES to take her prop
er , position as the
Leading
City
of Eastern Oregon.
King, ms servanre came in 10 open m bnt ifc is not recorded that .the ex
window curtains at 6 or 7 in the morn- i ,, K4..ro - onriuf-.
ing. He breakfasted in bed, read the i rflv to scientific test. In 1670 a Jesuit.
morning newspapers through, transact
ed what business was . brought to him
and then took a long doze of three or
four, hours. At 6 in the afternoon he
rose, dressed for dinner and . returned to
bed again between tO and 11.
Being unable to sleep much, he found
pleasure in ringing for tbe . servants,
ringing his bell forty times a night. '. t'
he wished to know the hour, instead .l
looking at his watch he rung for a serv
ant. If he wished a glass of water, in
stead -. of reaching his hand for it, he
rung again for a servant. -New York
World.
When Too Travel..
Don't wait until you reach the station.
a few minutes before it is time for the
train to start, before yon find out the
time for " starting, arriving at your des
tination -and the time- of. connection.
Other passengers wish to take the same
train, and must buy tickets. And don't
argue the question of the priee of- your
ticket with the ticket seller; the priceMa
settled by the managers and directors of
the road. If the price is unjust, address
a communication to them and stay -it
home till the price is satisfactory, or pay
it and keep still. Christian Union.
A Hint to the Wealthy.
. My health . is "getting worse , at d
worse; I've tried every clitiate, ' and
none of them afford me any relief, sail
a rich New York invalid to a friend.
'I'll tell you what to do: Move to Sins
Sing, ' and board at the penitentiary.
There is no record of a millionaire evc-i
having died within its walls." Tex:i
Sittings.' '. r-
, . What He Wanted to Say.
"Prisoner at the bar,' said tne judg
is1 there anything you wish to say b.-.
fore sentence is passed on you! ; . .;
V The prisoner looked wistfully towar.;
the door and remarked that he. woni.i
like to say "(Uood evening," if it wou -.
be agreeable to the company. Exchaug -.
Francis Lana. proposed to make four
copper balls, each twenty-five feet in
diameter and only four one-thousandths
of an inch in thickness, from which the
air was to be exhausted. -
To these balls, a ' basket was to be at
tached, with a mast and sail,, and tbe
calculation was that the contrivance
would carry 1,200 pounds. Unfortunate
ly1 it was discovered that the excessive
thinness of the' copper spheres., would
cause them to be broken when a vacuum
was created inside of them by the press
ure of. the atmosphere from without.
Nevertheless. this suggestion . ap
proached more nearly to a practici Ie
idea in aerostatics than any other off ereu
up to the time of the invention -of the
balloon in 1783 by. the brothers Mont
golfier. So late as 1775 Joseph ttalieu.
Dominican friar, and , . prof essor c
philosophy, contended that it would bo
possible to collect the rarefied air of
some loftv mountain top and inclose it
in a hu:re - vessel a- mile-.j-indiameter.
which would carry fifty-f our . times as
ranch weight as did Noah's ark. - ,
' Funnily enough, nearly all the earl y
theoristaoa this subject imagined that
the atmosphere merely . covered, the
earth like a shallow ocean, on which the
aerial vessels they had in mind were in
tended to float, like ships in the sea.
with their upper 'portions in the diffuse
ether that lay above. Washington Star
i i. The Extreme of Speech.
' 'I spent a wretched evening with Jo
Be almost talked me to death."
v "I spent as miserable a one with Frc
He wouldn't talk at all." Kate Fir K-Washington.-
(J. E: BpRD IdX;
Ileal Estate, :
Insurance,
: and Loan
- AGENCY.
ppcfa House Block, 3d St.
The paper, both daily and weekly, will
be independent in politics, and in its
criticism of political matters, as in its
handling of local affairs, it will be ,
We' will endeavor to give all the io-
cal news, and we ask that your criticism'
of our obj ect and course, be formed from
the contents of the paper, and not from
rash assertions of outside parties.
THE WEEKLY.
sent to any address for $1.50 per year.
It will contain from four to six eight
column pages, and we shall endeavor
to make it the equal of the best. Ask
your Postmaster for a copy, or address
THE CHRONICLE PUB. CO.
Office, N. W. Cor. Washington and Second Sts.
HURRAH!
It you, get tjolic,. uramp, Uiarrboea or
the Cholera Morbus tbe S. B. Pain Cure
is a sure cure.
The 4th of July!
If you need the Blood and Liver
cleansed you will 'find the 8-B. . Head
ache and Liver Cure a perfect remedy.
For sale by all druggists. . . ,
. .; ;. . Why Milk Soon. .. -',:
.Professor Tolomei, an Italian chemist,
concludes that the ozone produced by
electric discharges in a thunder storm
coagulates milk by oxidizing it, and gen.
erates lactic acid. Mr. Tread well, of th
Wesleyan . university, in discussing this,
states that the action is not a mere oxi
dation, but is in part produced by the
growth of bacteria, which is very rapid
in . hot, sultry . weather. New York
Times. , ; ;-'. - . .: " :
Doobtfal ConaMermtlM. ';
VMy husband is thedearest, mostcoD
siderate man in the world."
' "How does he show it?" ,
"He knows J hate tobacco smoke in
the house, and so he goes to the club
every night r.fter supper, and smokes
there." Harper's Batar...
: Chas. Stubling,
f ' . ?.'''- nonirnis optbk
: ; -New Vogt Block, Second St
' . WHOLESALE AND RETAIL
Liquor Dealer,
MILWAUKEE BEER ON DRAUGHT.
THE
DALLES
Th.e Grate City of th.e Inland Empire is situated at
the head of navigation on the Middle Colrunhia, and ,
is a tnnvine:. DrosDerous city.
It is the supply city for an extensive and rich agri-.
cultural an V grazing country, its trade reaching as;
far south as Summer Lake, a distance of over twe
hundred miles. .
The rich grazing country along the eastern, slope ,
of the .the Cascades furnishes pasture for thousands
of sheep, the -wool from which finds market here.
The Dalles is .the largest original . -wool shipping :
nnint in , Ainen'na .. ohnnt (CC (CC TiftTlTKlfa Vo4tiop'
shipped last year. . .i .
! ; . . ; ; ITS PRODHCTS.
The salmon fisheries are the finest on the Columbia, :
yielding this year a revenue of $1,500000 "which can
and -will he more than douhled in the near future.
; The products of the "beautiful Klickital valley find
market here, and the countrv south and east has this
year filled the -warehouses, and all available storage ,
places to overflowing "with their products.
ITS-WEALTH . ,
It is the richest city of its size on the coast, and its '
money is scattered over and is "being used to develop,
more farming country than is tributary to any other ;
city in Eastern Oregon. . .
Its situation is unsurpassed! : Its ' climate delight
ful! Its possibilities incalculable! Its resources un-;
limited! And on these corner stones she stands.