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SUNDAY JOURNAL, PORTLAND, SUNDAY A MORNING, SEPTEMBER 5. , 1320.
v. .
Kin
T -
Urg
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Family
Budget
rLxDiams Mow It WiU Work
Tom Thumb,
Little Giant,
And His Story
-NCE there was a dear little slant
V named Tom Thumb who was no
larger than a small pine tree. Just
what had stunted his growth I cannot
ay I only know that Tom led a very
. miserable life Indeed. To be little Is
bad, but to be a little riant Is terrible.
His mother was so ashamed. of Mm Uwtt
she would drop him Into the sugar bow)
when company came and Tom's father
was always making him Jump over lead
pencils or do other silly tricks to amase
his great friends.., And although Tom
was a man grown" the giants continued
to trent him as a child and Oicy lifted
him about and treated hira exactly as
tf he were a toy.
e
Tom Thumb Giant bad made himself a
roue from a huge wooden bowl. He
hud turned it upetae down, cut windows
and doors and furnished It with some
rough furniture of Ills own making, for
the giant's furnltare was mile too big
.wfor him. He would retire when he
- r wanted peace and auleL but often his
' father's friend would pick up Tom's
house and mischievously carry It off
with him In Hand leave him miles from
1 his home. They always returned tt, but
- it Is mighty Inconvenient Jumbling
about like a marble In a box. Ha was
a great reader, but the giant books
were twice as large as he himself.- If
Ms mother were In a good humor the
would get some down, and Tom, perched
on a ladder, would read contentedly
giant history and giant geography, but
on the wnola he bad a very poor time
OI 1L
A Queer School in Supposyville
rpHET have, a school for parents
In 8upposyviUe, my dears!
Where elders are Instructed bow
To drop a dozen years.
To drop dozen years or so,
And in Its memory classes
Old gentlemen forget their gout
And gTandmamaa their glasses!
The school meets one day every week
And has a grand review
Ot all tha things these grown np
parents
Used to play and do.
In one of the books he read of midgets
caned men and he was greatly sur
prised to learn that they were not even
as large as he was. MI will go and find
out about them, thought Tom. "for my
life here Is not worth ltrvlnal" Tom
made plans to escape from Boreogunga
ree, which as you doubtless know is the
.giant's kingdom, but before they were
V half completed he was helped ou his way
In i vary singular fashion.
On day, after he had shut the shut
ters and bolted the door of his wooden
bowl house In hopes of being undis
turbed, a little giant girt, about as tall
as a telegraph pole, came along, picked
up his house and hurled It with all her
strength over the treetops. Tom's
mother and father, who really loved
their little midget son, wrunf 'their
hands, but that did poor Tom no-, good.
. Before they could cat oh up to the bowfl
tt had fallen down Into a broad river
and next thing Tom knew be was
whirling along at grt speed In sat ap-
siae Down House. The floor, which he
had so carefully built In tha bojtoht oU
u iwi, nu oeen rip pea on ana ail
the furniture turned topsy-turvy.
Fortunately the windows and doors
were fast shut or Tom" would have ben
drowned. As it was he whirled along
with the current In his singular boat
ana hnd soon been carried entirely out
of Boreogungaree. He was greatly
astonished to corns after a whlld to
houses and villages Just about right for
Mniself and when the bowl touched
shore near the little white town Tom
Jumped out and ran In great dellcht to
ee what real people would be Ilka.
The wooden bowl floated away and
as Tom. except for his unusual dress,
looked quite like other men the town
folk of Turryvllle made him welcome
and when he aaked for work an old
farmer employed him willingly to help
plow and milk. -First," said he. "brlnf
horns the coivs to the barn " Away
want Tom whistling the "Banks of
Boreomingaree." and returned in sev.
cral vmlnatea with a cow under each
arm. imagine the amatement of tha
psoepla. Tom found himself straight
way a hero and arter that wherever
was a hoary piece of work to be done or
load to be lifted there also wu Tb-
Thumb Giant and every one. marveled
at his strength. But he told no on As
was a giant, and after a while when he
had tired of the town of Turryvllle he
continued his travels through the world.
ana ins last i neard o him h had a
" Tla only fair." Supposy's King
Explained,. "for us to try
To keep up with the boys and girls
Who'll pass us by and by!
"They ro to schools and learn a lot
Of charts and arts and science.
Of sums and map from knowing
chaps
To give them self-reliance.
"And try to grow up as we wish
And so It's right that wo
Should learn a bit of their way, too
Or so, It seems to me.
'Tor too much knowledge makes us
cross
; And altogether haughty
And so superior, we think '
All childish pranks are naughty!
"Cut in the school for parents, w
Remember back and see
lt'a Just a Joyous overrun
Of youth and fun and glee!
"And as the boys and girls are trying
Hard to please us hero
By studying OUR ways, so WE try
To study theirs!" A dear
That old King is; and what a file
And Jolly1 sort of plan ;
There's lots of Joy a girl or boy
Can teach a grown-up man!
So every Sunday night, she would
stay borne) and make oat ber menu
card for the tnoomdng wk.
By Ring W. Isuilne
To the Editor:
Theaa davs most everybody ars
preaching economy to Uvelng said
etc but 'tha great majority don't
know how to i go
About it to lay
something a side
for a rainy day of
witch god knows
w a have had
enough of them on
Long's Island this
ummir, but any
way I run acrost a
married couple, of
man end wif . tha
ether day that has got S children all
under 60 yra, of age and the mdn
showed me where he had solved the
high cost problem and was saveing
enough every wk. so as in a few yra
he can quit work and not half to
worry as they will be enough in the
bank to insure he and his family va.
want In their old age.
This man is a plasterer by trade
and only makeing $250 per wk. as
the union don't allow him to work
Mondays, Wednesdays, Friday. Sun
days and holidays and only a H day
Saturday A. M. Well 1 night this
man and the old lady, as he called
his wife, sat down and had a serious
talk and begin to figure things : out
and found they was only laying $190
per wk. to 1 side and spending all the
rest of it. In a few yra at that rate
they would be llveing on the bounty
of the county.
So this bird said to his wife. "We
have got to eeonomlze somewheres
or ruin is stalrlng us In the face as
all I can scrimp up in my profession
is $250 per wk. and we ain't saveing
only 1190 of it and wile we are Uve
lng in the lapse of luxury, why sup
pose something should happen to me
so as I couldn't plaster no more
where would you and the kiddles be
at? So I propose that we start and
run the house on the budget system."
A Ban on Luxuries
8o the Mrs. who hadn't never seen
the insides of a college asked him
what was the budget system.
"Well' h says, "the word budget
comes from 2 Lithuanian words budg
and et and.it means I will give you
$10 per wk. to buy the food an
clothes and pay the rent and wash
ing and servants and etc. and I will
take the other $240 and sUck.it in
the old saveliigs bank every wk. and )
4n a few yra we can give the world I
the laugh eyen if I can't plaster or
get plastered no more."
Bo his Mrs. was tickled to death
aad said let us try it begglnning
next wk. t
Well she set down with a paper
and pencil and figured out that they
had been throwing away pretty near
$2.00 per wk. on luxurya that wasn't
getting them nowheres and was
dressing the children too heavy and
they was all eatW too much j rich
food and she read in the paper some
wheres that it was a great saveing
of brains aad time and money' if
the house wife would make out her
bill of fare for the Wk. on say, a
Sunday nirht. so every Sunday might.
Instead of her going to a gambling
he 11. she would stay home i and
make out her menu card for the in
comelng wk.. and after a couple wks.
practice not only, was. she running
the house on the $10 budget but
aha was laying alia wk. a side for
a rainy day to buy a umbrella, fol
lowing is a typical expenses acct.
that she made out for a wk:
Food
Monday, breakfast A nejio-
vies, ripe olives, celery, clam
- broth, sword fish., ham and agga,'
liver and bacon, lettuce and to
matoes with Coney Island dress
ing, honey dew a la mode, oof
' fee and cigars, cognac.
Monday luncheon Rum cook
tait, terrapin, Rhode Island
Reds, port! spinach and onions,
toothpaste. coffea aad cigars,
Russian kutnmel.. Monday din
nerCaviar, Martinis, 'Mareonia,
Lobster, Guinea hen, O'Brien's
potatoes, soot pudding, coffee
and cigars, creme de meathe.
Total expense $1.2 i.
On Tuesdays and Wednesdays
and Thursdays they wassail too
sick to eat anything.
Friday breakfast Butterflsh, .
weakfifh, schrod. halibut, sea
bass. Friday luncheon Brook
trout, perches, whlteflsh, catfish,
dogfish, whale meat, coffee and
cigar, sherry.. Friday. dinner
Oysters, clams, crawfish, smelts,
shrimps, redbots, blue gins,
hook, Una and linkers. Total
expense $1.25.
Saturday breakfast Talcum
powder, porterbouae, smothered
onions, Long Island prairie doga,
snipe, squab, qUail, pheasant.
Watertowv geass. bacon and
eggs, soup and fish. Saturday
luncheon Robins, thrush, larks,
bob-o-Iink, parrots, canarys, owl
eyes, coffee and cigars. Satur
day dinner Sherry and egg.
Total expense $1.25.
Sunday breakfast Ice cream,
cold cream, vaseline. Cigars and
coffee. Sunday dinner Cracker
Jack, popcorn, peanuts, caramels.
milk chocolates, chewing gum,
candys, coffee and cigars. Sun
day night supper Belgian po
lice doga.' Pomeranians, York
shire terriers, spaniels, mastiffs,
Boston baked bulls, greyhounds,
wolf hounds, alredales. setters,
pointers, water and cigars, cogn
ac. Total expense $1.26.
This left Mra Plasterer with $6.00
bucks per wk to throw away on her
I I Hill MM III II 1 1 III! 1 1 III I II II III I II I II Mill II H II II II III III I III III I 111 1 1 II II 11 I 1
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The word budget oomcs from a Lithuanian words budg and ct.
i
-
. 5 '
and the ktds's as the' husband eoiild
get along O.K. op his plasterer's ub!
term, so she decided that the best
way to de would be to leave the kids
run around bare and that left her
$4.00 per wk. to buythoes, or 1 pair
a wk., and still leave her $1.00 to
stick In the aavelnga bank.
How It Worked
As for the clothes outside of the
shoes and etc., my friend the plaster
er's wife saved enough shells off of
the sea food to keep her children in
shell glasses as they was all near
sighted, and she save enough bones
off of the fish to keep herself In
corsets, and she saved enough fur off
the dogs to make herself a coat and
enough feathers off of the birds to
keep her hats and enough leaves off
of the lettuce and anchovies to make
her dresses, and all and all it will
take a whole lot of tough luck for
this family to find them self in the
realms of poverty and I give the de
tails to your readers in the hopes
that they profit by it, as all a per'
son needs'-to beat the cost of Uvelng
Is a budget system and a thrifty wife.
RINQ W. LARDNER.
Lear's Island. Sept. S.
(Coprricht. 120, br Uta Bell SyndtesU, lao.)
. I Brew Own Perfume
A number of Parte women have gone
back to the practice of their grandmoth
ers and are brewing their own perfumes.
This ia because the new government tax
on perfumes and hair lotion has caused
sharp advlnceeSsn prices.
Feathered Patriotism
Waukegan, 111., ts boasting of the most
patriotic bird in the United States. Its
neat was recently found by one of the
local residents, fastened together by the
ordinary elgs--ugether with an Amer
ican flag.
Women;-' Aro
THe Rulers ;
, s In Loo Choc
On the wonderful Isle of Loo Choo,
women are the whole Showonly In one
respect does the lord and master stand"
en his dignity and exercise the peroga-
live of his sex. , .
Women conduct an business and "have .
charge of everything pertaining, to -
money with the single slight excep- '
tlon of spending it that's the perogatlve
alluded to. The market, where In the
morning trading for vegetables aad fruit
Is earned on, reaembles a suffrage meet -Ing
place, for among the crowded mess
of humanity not a man Is to be -seen.'- ' ,
writes Roy Chapman Andrews -to the ""1
National Oeogrsphlo Msgaslne. ' '
"The Led Choo (Luchu or Ryukyu) is- v
lands are lend links between Japan and -
Formosa, not far from China's coastwise
routes. They are on the busy hlghwaya
of ocean travel, and yet are vlalted by
only two or three white persons a year. -
"Loo Choo Is a land run of the inee- ,vr
scribable charm and mystery ot the Orl- .-,
tot, but replete with the pathos of a:4'
vanishing rsce. ;
-But. although It has been 40 year
since there sounded the death knell of..
thia little hidden kingdom. Loo Choo lsv
not yet Japan. ' The traveler realises
this even before he land. The-pine-clothed,
tomb-dotted hills which form .
the background of the strange l.ttle clt- ,r
les of Nahawnd Bhurt have an untanHl-.U
las look and the pretty tiled roots of the
diminutive houses, Just visible over tha,,
surrounding gray stone walla, give fas-, t,
elnatlng hints of what may. be found be-,
yond their lacquered gateways. On their,,
entire $00 square mllea of land only one-,
white man, an American missionary, JstV
resident. -:
"With our money changed we began -to
look about to spend It for Loo Choo
la tha bome of tha ..red lacquer! ware ..
famous throughout the world. Much of
It la eximrtad. and tha finest of the'"
boxes, bowls, trays, tables, eta, which f
are In daily use in Japan and China and
sold to tourists throughout the Orient.
come from the little city of Nana. or-r
Bhurt. Its neighbor serosa the hills. The"
lacquer ware, when first made, Is a
dull brown, but really first class pleoes
Improve with age and anon change to?'
a beautiful vermilion, becoming brighter"
and clearer the longer they are used.
"When we came' to buy lacquer we r
were greatly surprised to find that bar-,,
gaining had no place In Loe Choo. WUh-3,
out exception, the first price asked fot
an article was the one for which It was,;, -sold.
Never In the Orient had w mat.,,
with a similar condition." Iu
According to government estimates U.
is believed th,at a complete exploration
of the national forests In southern..
Alaska will show that there la k quarter ". ,
- M 1,1, . . . . . . .. . ' .
ot a miuion norsepowvr oi unaavetopea
weterpower possibilities.
im
position as strong man In a clrcua Ha
could lift an elephant as easily as you
or I a puppy dog. for he had the
strength of his giant relations without
their else, and I should not be sur
prised if you might see him soma day,
end If you do, will you ask him the way
to Boreogungsree, for I myself should
like a peek at that Olant Kingdom.
Youll ' know Tom by hla white teeth and
red hair. Be watching when the next
circus comes, 'cause Tom Thumb Giant
ia surely one of 'em.
flinrenc
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MOONLIGHT DANCE
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The Puzzle Corner
Although the Forgetful Poet is too
old to go to school himself, he evi
dently haa It on his mind. Can you
gueaa-what be la talking; about?
Hefioel Hsspue
Now, Just put en your thinking raps
And find these school supplies
Another name for sovereign ...
Will give oust Z surmise. .
A form that medicine comes In
Wilt give some more, I think;
A small incloaure still another
Lon't forget the
A room will describe
What each scholar moat do.
And the noise from a 'gun
What the teacher gives you.
Behoofs not so worse - .
Jut you take It from me. .
There's a let wf old friends "
I'm. Just era ay to see.
Frm rVf
Morrison Dock
TONIGHT
9:00 P. M.
Sharp
On Portland's Palatial Pleasure Boat
BLUE BIRD
Spend a light-hearted evening on the moonlit
Willafnette. , Enjoy a dance on spring floors,
with ;
The"Famotu New Orleans Jazz Orchestra -
For your comfort are check rooms, comfort
cabins, lunch countermand easy chairs.
There won't be many more such nights!
50cfeCptilIionHaIl,Sepfc8
Two Public Excursions Labor Day under personal
I airecuon or m. m. tungier
AT 2
P.jM.
Leave West Morrison Dock
At 8
P.M.
-s'' .... - ' r
THE WORLD
and . -
I HIS WIF R r 3
A naming Romance ' " 'j s ! " -;fx
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