THE OREGON SUNDAY JOURNAL,
PORTLAND,
... . .1
SUNDAY MORNING, FEBRUARY, 11, 1012.
Health
an
CONDUCTED FCR THE JOURNAL'
saw
(T3Y LOSACLtTinLE
Questions by renders on subjects of general Interest pertaining to this col
umn will be answered gladly by Mrs. Little. All questions should be addressed
to Mrs. Lora C. Little, oar Oregon Journal, and ao trained aa to be answered
tn a limited apace. ,v-v v j ,. -. ,.-,'.-''
- . Ttc Baoy and tLe Medical Machine
;T5f)e 'Sunday Smile
V ' is Stranger ' Than , Fiction'
E3
PORTLAND, FEB. 11, 1012.
EDITED IN FUN BY.
MILES OVERHOLT
from , (or dying of) the measles. But '
Oliver must have been watching the
door, for he had seen them before they Entered at the postoffice as. second
couia araw away. W , , ; ; , y cjaSs matter but! that' f aa far as
urn people weep.ror joy. bo ao ea- the second class roes. "
f A slight forecast of whet -we are
coming to, la shown In the subjoined
true story. ' Already the reader will see
the medical machine' runs smoothly,
grinds finely, in the larger cities. Once
a. rtrUM. km . th,n hA Die, when f or even lone davi all their
so remote, so retired, as to escape 1U imemory of Mamma and Daddy has This -paper s -wire aerrica extends
clutch 1' 4; . .. ;.;,! t;y:i.'i;v, ..been one big ache, drowned :- ln; tears, from pole to pole! ; .V"-
Telegraph.
On seeing his Barents, the little fellow
AST June (1911) I was delivering cried as though his heart would break.
a series of leotures to a group
TTtnallw f BiafA In h 1st MAthaWsi affmsl Vilas
of women at; Mount, Tabor. , To CLmrtl. . . ... ., THE WEATHER: t.j
v , w- m bi t - t..- , , p nnny wnara tn lawnrnnwer wenit
T
. " f " 7-' Ottn V r1f was i-lrh tW befor
V.ZV;"J"ZS;;lL W; :.itIt wi here last fall-now,
coloring, some . flower1 f from , her na-":-v But the hour passed quickly, and then who borrowed , It? i Worse yet. Who
tive Alps. Ever at her side, an lnsep- j,ow be dung to his father! How pits- Jnea " Not you-Of course not!
arable companion, was ber little. J-y ear- ouuy he crledt With achln beartstThen who? Ah, weloday and .t
old awn.. b'vttmdi mXiSva ' they lef t him to strangers. ; - - TOMORROW- STORMY.
ence of strangers, solemnly meditative. " . ' . .,v . 'I. ..
His combination of shyness and ..Jieal. ? On the-way back ,te the elty. him pa- , ....... a .
thy nerves made him. a striking; con- rents talked, aw the situation and got :- ; EDITORIAL IJKE ' : -I
, treat' te -the average fidgety American what comfort they could out Of the fact ; ... j- : tur2 L
child. At different times the ladles that the child .was. to their Inexpert . We ,ten wonder what there ta in
present tried to -draw him out, but in - eyei, ' doing reasonably welt f To b I the general makeup of certain people
sure he was very hoarse. - And all to cause them to be SO haughty. .
those twenty-five sick children Tiad but Yesterday we asked a man for a
vain; he clung to his mother end re
fused all commerce- with strangers.
His mother said be had never been 111
a day In bis life, and as we all grew
better acquainted she told os of the
plan of her husband- . and herseir to - v . h-w . nearlv. choked to death. We
to Bwuzenana, wnen. ;;r-:V' . v""r i- ; .; -
make
visit
a single nurse, with an assistant to mafch, and the haughty glare he gave
help her, s How much watching Oliver - j . kit. '.i.
must need to keep him In bed and quiet us "used us. P'te, "r Adam 9 apple
How little he must get. " The nurse had until we nearly choked to death.; We
intHo hlr bov to his lm n appfarea -io oe a wish . pcopie woman i a mat way.
" nalernal arandmother and other rela-?P0,1 child and almost Impossible to If they only knew it, they could have
uT The trip was8 to tagto when theP , ed. Perhaps that , account- a whofe lot more fun with us by treat
.lectures Twer. over..p . - - ' fJ chu'nL'" 'Cw ingus for the time being aa an equal.
' Accordingly. late In June the young t n Son. t XVXZg?Z B it is that way wherever we ffO.
couple with their child began the long l t-' Tt Wego to a hotel and timidly ask for
Journey.-, From Denver, eestwaro tney , iCk and i troublesome children, under a roorp. and the clerk will ing out:
i.rjw. a-".?' J"?J :.TJ th..' "Boy, show this mutt up to the gar-
d.n the dTthe heat was Intense. S:- SJT
rm.& . . in th i tr on a Kacur- rrk.i- u.i . .t , irai orutr- iut ticm. muuuu .uc
av and booked their passage for the dr m A .1.1.1. h. ...ix .. would
his wife and get a suite of
foUowing Saturday. In the Interval there was no way to help it The ma- rooms on the first flow for less
they would look about the city and es- ,chne rroun1 on- ., money than we pay for the garret
tabllshed themselves In 'oor" l The next day they went to an official We go into a restaurant and beg the
Eighth avenue and Fort,-thr w toava the power of release and waiter to bring us a prune andaa nap-
Coming from the ,coo ellmate 0f quarantlna over an .tooee unfortunate. kin, and he- waits ,a Vouphj ofVurs,
Portland, all felt the neat greauy, anu jn tne hospital, and - they explained n, nA i tn r1
the baby complained so much of being their case to him. Jfhey told him bow then 5ome,aCk W . nt 9
tired that bis father purchased a go- they wished to sail, and how they felt peat the order. Another man comes
-cart In which to convey him about they -could take caro of their child 1 and blusters around and the pro
through the streets and parka: Finally, without endangering anyone. And he prietor waits on him and then fires
on Friday, the ' day b'orju that -on Bald-WelL , if he seems to be getting the cook if the man asks him to do SO.
which they were to sail, little Oliver on all right. I will release him so you We s-et ao discouraeed sometimes
roa-doocutnor that M'VMnu took h,m -ttrs ss. $&Xfiz
Now this step was the most natu- So the- mother spent the next few fore we. can atop. ; , :
ral thing In the world to do; five- days in hope and , eager anticipation. A . , . : -
sixths of the parents of this country As the time approached she e;ot his A lonely poet began to die;
would have done tno same niag ia uu gmrmenis au reaay to areas him rie started in to perruy,
LOCAL AND KIND-OF
. . PERSONAL .
E, Henry Wemme, the veteran auto
man, while out in the country the
other day. met a pilgrim who wasn't
exactly what you could call a success
at operating his car.' The machine
would go first rate for a minute, then
it would dash into a bank, alongside
the road; then, it would stop and as
suddenly start! E. Henry was of the
opinion that the machine or the driver
was kind of foolish in the head.
' Your machine s kind of nuttr.
isn't itV he remarked pleasantly to
the driver. "What'a the matter with
it? Locoed?"
The man looked up. a painful smile
on his f ace.. "Sure, it's locoed," he
said. "It's a Loco-mobiler
"The only bonified sale . in' Port
land," says a sign on a dry goods store
on Seventh street And after looking
at the long, angular salesmen, we are
inclined to believe it's the truth. -
circumstances. But, marm aiu wm
the fatal step. In that city the pri
vate physician no longer exists. Kv
ery doctor there has become a cog in
the medical machine, and once the ma-
chin rets Its grip vfpon you. you can
not escare: you are drawn
ground through the machine,
In and
10 sail across the water to
grandma. Thursday aha was
until
A telegram came Thursday evening
summoning them to their child's bed
side.. That meant they knew, that be
was dangerously 111. They started at
once for North Brother Island. ' but
his He went stone blind, did this lone-
nappy, orne bard. "
And he murmured low:
hard."
"I am dying
To the parents of the little sick Ore- learned at the ferry that
Speaking of spring hats:
The next scene, ladies and eentle-
" wo men, snows tne great American wo-
it
gon child, tne ew xur ' i," " I. " " " man in that husband-busting, drown-
"He has the measles, and I have no re- have to wait until Friday morning S-man scene entitled Grasoing at
course but to report the case to the There was no sleep that long nlsrht for m5;m 8ceno n"ea rasping at
health department" ' the ?nx,ouf mth'. Next mornlng-on a Straw.
Observe, that when the doctor reports IJ?hh12 'heJLnch,W tto "w onc
. rnoA 0f measles he naa Yinumj m-
Hnoithed the case. Contagious dis-- The nur explained that be seemed
eases are under the care of the health be doing; well, when she left blm the
rtrnt and the doctor is merely f befcra, and when she returned to
v.I iV.V .moil rnr wara, ane naa round nun In a re-
the first small cog.
A doctor from the health department
soon put in an appearance and arranged
to have the child removed to the quar
antine hospital. Next day In the af
ternoon along came ona of those rickety,
horse-drawn conveyances which New
' Tork city still utilises for the convey
ance of her sick, and wlth.lt in addi
tion to the driver, a young sprig of a
near-doctor.
In consenting to have their sick child
Placed in a hospital these parents had
not dreamed that hie mother would be
separated from him for a moment And
when they saw that she could not go
lft the ambulance with him, they
strove to pacify the child 'with prom
ises that she was coming right after
him, and that tt was only for a little
while. For they decided to follow in a
car, and thought to reach the hospital
nearly as soon as the ancient ambu
lance. , -
The young doctor wasted rto time.
The child was placed on a mattress
on the floor of the conveyance, and
handing the hospital card to the par
ents, the doctor entered the ambulance,
. ordered the driver to drive on, and car
ried away a child frantically crying for
his mother, from whom he was now
torn for the first time. Just when In
all his little life he oould bear It the
least
Anxious to rejoin her sick baby, , the
mother hastily examined the card and
hurried to a telephone to learn how
da vail . treti tn . Vi fenanltfil Wfolnh
she now learned was on North Brother
Island.
lapse. She was astonished, knew of no
cause, etc., etc.
He lived until Sunday.
Among the things these parents have market.
uovcr Deen aoie 10 learn, are:
What killed their beautiful child T
Was he, too, vaccinated on being tak
en to the Island of death f
What waa the treatment glwen hint
thereT .
Was he, a mere baby, for want of at
tention, allowed to run about on the
bare" floor until he caught cold and
the measles "struck InT
Why la the cruelty tolerated that
separates a little sick child from the
comforting presence and tender care of
a loving mother?
IT DIDNT SMELL EXACTLY
LIKE A DAISY YESTKR
N DAY, EITHER.
COLUMBIA RIVER
SMELT TODAY
Sign on a Morrison street meat
Gus Newbury, a lawyer-like pilgrim
from down Medford way, was in our
midst last week. : Gus looks like Abra
ham Lincoln and acts like he doesn't
care if be does. Once Gus was en-
Jaged as an attorney for a man at
acksonville who had been arrested
on a charge of stealing a sack of ap
ples from a neighbor.
"Did vou steal the apples?" Gus in
quired of his client.
"Sure," replied the man.
"What did you steal them for?" in
quired the lawyer. "Haven't you
plenty of apples at home?"
"Sure," said the man, "but these
were worthy applies. I stole 'em to
get the worms for fish bait."
And then Gus resigned. He said
his client was' the better lawyer of
the two.
Captain 'Smeltneck of the steamer
Eltonia was on the river last week.
He does not operate a fishing smack.
REMARKS OF JOHN EAGLE
FEATHER :
Newspaper hini tell: .White squaw
hold pow-wow, yell heap "Vote for;
squaw." Ught ,.vo.-;: , '
Long time 'go mebbeso twenir,
thirt' year Injun ' squaw him tell:
"We eo waroath. all same Iniun.
Wear era war - paint,: scalp white
man. Papoose no good, Injun no
good. We pikeway."
Injun man, him say "No.", ,:V
No good, squaw pikeway, mebbeso
thirt', fort'.
Medjcine man, him tell: "Injun
pikeway, lose um squaw t
Injuns tear down wickiup; pikeway
mebbeso fiP miles. Me stay watch.
'b?fred;c.iibiLy.
TIT
w
(Copyright 11; by Fred C Kelly.)
1 AEHTNOTON, Feb. JO. Conrressman Legare of South Carolina was
passing the time of day with a constituent la a small town where he
bad gone to make a speech.-, -.?-'v-r '-.v, :'l '
-How's your wlfer- asked Legare. ;:. : y : -v .,
A pained look came over the man's face. "Ain't you heard of my
great loss," he asked, swallowing lugubriously. ..r. , 2 , :
' No. Jim, I hadn't" murmured Legare. - -., - , f '
-wny, 1 lost my wire nearly two months ago." the man told him. a
'That la Indeed too bad." said Legare, sympathetically. "Had she
SICK long!" : - ..- , , ( ;...,.;..'!...
"Oh. she always was kind of" frail Ilka," said the bereaved husband.
then-he added: ' r;
"The one I've got now seems to be good and strong, though. . '
been
And
ICverV tnembp of ! thr hrtutr.li nf pnn arrnmm anA aaua.. - Y. .
been swamped during the last few weeks with' calls from constituents who
JBymeby, mebbeso two sleeps, woo employes. - r. ... ......
squaw come back. Mebbeso lone
some, mebbeso hongray. Heap cry.
Two sleeps, me come, say:
warrior - now? Want scalp,
fight?" . - -
All tell: "No. trot blentv."
"Plenty good squaw now, betchu."
Kit snow 'um trail to wickmn.
"You
' hunt
Tell:
nnpiwnwun uim.mii ui jinuiavnav koi urea 01 neanna so mucn woa ana
put on his hat the other morning to make a round of all the government bu
reaus in town, hoping to corral a few jobs for some of his people.
There was absolutely nothing doing. Dixon returned to hia Office about
1:80 in the afternoon, greatly disgusted after his fruitless quest On his desk
was a memoranda that one bureau chief had called blm on the phone.
Without waiting, to call the man. Dixon rushed back to that bureau. . Doubt
less he was on the trail of a Job or two at last , ,
"Just wanted to say," remarked the chief, "that X was so busy whea you
were hers this morning that I forgot my manners. I might at least have of
fered you a smoke. Here, try one of these," And he handed Dixon a stogie. -
hite squaw all same. Got nlentv
t,..i..i.: . ... - 1. neni
k-.5: ?"inl .olVr .R.e,my tr as rear admiral of the Swiss navy.
wt-ou. nut uuugu, a cu . , want veracity
VOte. Ugh I Swiss naw at all. but it is considered a fine take amonap th dlnlnmaiM fnttr tn
'What for?" white man say. address Mr. Martin twlttlngly aa "admiral." Martin, who la one of the best
roller skaters in town, is good natured about it but would Just as soon turn
Squaw heap glad.
Wr,
Henri Martin, first secretary of the Swiss legation. Is known In diplomatlo
clety aa rear admiral of the Swiss navy. Strict adherence to one's coda of
veracity makes it necessary to state that young Martin isn't an admiral of the
, ji . ...
-ause, ten white aquaw.
" 'Cause what for?" say white man.
. " 'Cause me no got it," tell white
squaw.
over bis Impromptu title to some chieftain of the Salvation Army,
Two Wisconsin members of the house sat In a Capitol restaurant the other
"Alt.. Uk.L l . ... nma, wusnuig niwrviiy nw m propvBiuon xnm. one OI Mn naa JUSl OUlllnea.
Alter rercn-mn vote, whatr" white The two are great frltnds, and there wouldn't be anything noteworthy about
man say,
"No sawy." tell white
"Mebbeso whiskers."
them sitting together and laughing while macerating their food, except that
squaw. the7 are soon to be rival opponents ror congress. . Their names are Nelson and
Kopp, and they represent the Second and Third Wisconsin districts. The
state legislature, reckoning not of their friendship, merged the two districts.
and now Messrs. Kopp and Nelson must fight it out They both like It first
rate here in Washington and would rather spend their winters here than in
THE FULL DINNER PAIL
laxe it iron) me, I am fond of the Wisconsin, but one must return home st the end of his present term and stay
COOKS,
To tell you the truth, I like what
they make:
My poetic soul may hanker for books,
But I put 'em awar when thev
brinflr in the cake.
Believe me or not, I am stuck on my
cats;
there. Every few days Kopp and Nelson take lunch together and laugh over
the schemes they are going to resort to against one another when the cam
tal an ooens uo. -
Senator La Follette can work long hours without much show of fatigue, in
consequence of a rare gift of being able to will himself to sleep on short no
tice. He can drop off to sleep at any hour of the day or night that he desires
to sleep. . If He Is on a long, tiresome speaking tour, and with nearly every
moment occupied, and finds himself with 20 minutes to snare, ha'll mmv Wr,
Sentiment's good when the dinner m3r chance 'or a little sleep." And within a minute he'll be slumbering like a
is o er;
cat behind a stove.
After a quarter of an hour dose nicked ud In that manner
Drinkinz's all riirhf when r.KJ h feel" "freshed and is good for 20 hours, if need be, of hard mental toiL :,.
wnnKing s ail ngnt wnen somebody La Follette says he hss cultivated his knack of willing himself to sleep
n.. ;,VwL. j .1. r lmPly because he has to. He can't arford to get "keyed up" over his work and
But pudding and pio is the stuff I waste time with insomnia. ; : .
adore.- tv;t,4.;: :
Any old way I'm a fiend for 'my feed, Talking about sleep recalls the sad case of James R. Mann, the bouse mi-
jrrunes . ana potatoes will both "oniy posmuun. wum. nnin u ruauy laceo, towneaaea Dane, once
rhyme with me.
Plenty of food is all that I need
J.o keep me contented, though
riches mav flee.
Take it from me, I am fond of my
grass;
Feed me, then take everything that
I own:
No need for chloroform, ether or arai:
r . . . . , . . . Bill V UtUQr UIKU
rmK on me ear, tnings ana leave entered for two years.
me aione.
Mana sleeps nice a ruddy faced, towheaded babe, one ha
gets started, but In order to relax his mind before retiring he is obliged to read
a current novel every night He has a standing order at the Library .of Con
gress to supply htm with six quick sellers a week.
"And." laments Mann, "nine tenths of the novels era rotten. They may be
better to take than bromide tablets, but it's tough to have to read such stuff."
Besides consuming all these popular novels, Mann reads one book a week on
gardening.
Seid Bing. it teems, was killed bv
a pair of tongs.
AS THE CARTOONISTS VIEW CURRENT EVENTS
Senator Jonathan Bourne Jr., of Oregon, Is going to try an experiment prob
ably never before undertaken by a candidate for the United States senate or
any other high office. He will run for the senate In a state that he heajiot
He left Oregon in the fall of 1910. and does not olad
to return there until some time after the election In 1912, at which time be will
oe a canaioata.
After congress adjourned last summer Bourne purposely avoided setting foot
in Oregon, in order to pile up an absence of two years in the Interest of his
sxpertment
Senator Llppltt of Rhode Island thinks Anthony Trollops la probably the
world's greatest author. . .
HE great deficiency in publio ta
bles la the shortage of veget
ables cooked and raw, but par
ticularly raw. It should be
possible for anyone to order
some kind of uncooked salad veget
able, without dressing, and In any
quantity desired, without having to pay
therefor more than ten times what It
would cost at the grocery. It ought to
be possible to order a soup and not be
compelled to eat a porridge. It ought
to be practicable to get cooked veget
ables, either slightly salted or not
salted at all. It should be possible' to
have fresh vegetables in their season
and not take the bensoated product of
a tin can. Economy in salt, baking
powder and grease would Improve
much of the pastry.
' No doubt- the restaurant people have
.their
triiaJKIngg JilrAsarf Kn f r hara , las
Imagine her dismay on learning thafa faat growing element among their
she would not' be permitted to be- with
her baby, nor even to go to sea where
he had been taken. She was told that
visiting day was Friday was coolly in
formed that she could go.' to see him
next Friday. .
. "But the card says Sunday and Fri
day," phoned the anguished - mother,
"Can't I go to see him tomorrow 7"
"No," was the reply, "the regulations
have bean changed since the card, was
printed. Friday is the only day In th
week we admit visitors,."
1 The ,. wheels of - the machine were
grinding! They had her and those she
loved fast In their grip. Friday! A
whole week, and baby sick and crying
.himself sicker , for her,, and she could
not know what treatment , was -given
him, nor how he was cared for, could
not be by his bedside to sooth him, to
see that his pillow was comfortable, to
be Bure that all his little wants were
attended to. And oh, how wild he must
be to see her,, and how frightened and
hurt by the care of atrangera, the dear,
little tender, mother-baby that he was!
But. she tried to be brave. and she
kept as much of this Inside as possible.
tier mroat acnea, but sue crowded back
. the teara and went with Baby's daddy
down to the ferry landing, and stand
ing there, they looked brokeY heartedly ,
1 of f at the island where thefr loved one
had been taken, and where now on a
hospital cot they, knew he was tossing
iwlth fever snd crying his little heart
-.out for his mother. ! , ;
The, week that followed was an in
terminable hlghtmare.V When, after
. jong ages, .j naay morning came, and -the
hour for admitting visitors, Oliver s
parent took the . ferry for the Island.
On- landing, they were' first conducted
to the office and there they were In
formed that; they could not be admit
ted to the hospltal untll they were vac-',
clnated. V Both had 1 : been vaccinated, -
rears Derore. ana nennpp wininv -
to-submit again to the operation, but (
rf It-was the price of seeing their baby,
that settled It. Hot plowshares could ,.
not f have stopped them. .They bared '
their arms 1 and took their dose of vl-:
rus; It was but another turn of tha ,
'Wheels, :,';w;y''',''.','--''7,V . -it-Before
coming they ; had talked it
- over and agreed that if they couM take '
'a peep afv Baby and not let him serf
them, they would do it. They would,
spare h Ira'' the distress of another part
lng If fney could. .',:" -'''
-wflofhe door was opened, Just a crack,
Into tha two connecting wards where
iwemy-uva oouareo were - recovering
pauuuv iui lifts ouisruwn ilia oiu i
style fatstarchsnrandmeat comblna-'
tlon, and .what is more, it will not long '
continue to patronise the -tables that
have nothing else to offer. The naw de
parture costs ho more, but It Involves
a change, and restaurant people, like
some others, shy at making changes.
WENT to the music hall with Mrs.
Sawbuck this afternoon," said
Mrs. Jameeworthy, "nd we
heard a splendid address by Prof.
Schwartzendorfer, who - comes
from one of the big German uni
versities. Sbme of his statements were
startling. , He says that the average
American housewife 1 wastes enough
In a day to feed some foreign families
for a week." "
"Well, I haven't much use for a man
who calls himself a professor aa a
general thing," aald Jameeworthy. "Such
a man nearly, always wears sldewhis
kers and says 'eyether for 'either and
parts his . hair down the back of his
head. But In this case your fiery un
tamed professor was handing out an ex
cellent line of truth, and I hope you
profited by his remarks. It Is-notorious
that the American housewife is tha
most wasteful creature on earth. That
is the reason why so many unfortunate
husbands are sitting around under the
trees at the poor farm.
"The other day I got a bill from the
AN ARROGANT MONOPOLY. w lf" Sj
'V "The lowa ldea
" iiSiSis ill I
1 mi nssrrssssnnr 1 ct.atttx. -b-.. . ....... .
jT ; , i. . 1 1 Bg 1 ' " " v f - unamnEMCEE, - ,
7 J rtXOASO K'COVD HfRALD , sr', Til... 1 L
k s & - v SI a (mn 0-&iSnv
cheerful corsair who runs the meat mar
ket and when Z looked down the Hat of
things charged against me X felt like a'
man who has bean denied a reprieve by
tha governor. There , waa nothing in
sight but porterhouse steak and pork
tenderloin and all the fancy brands of!
meat. There wasn't a soupbono or a
pound of beef liver on the MIL i Then;
I sat down and recalled tha grand old
days when I lived at home. ;
"Mother ' was a woman ' of the old
school. She didn't care three whoops
about culture elubs or bridge, clubs or
anything of that-sort but when it cams
to managing a household and fatten
ing a family she was a four horse team,,
with a coach dog under the wagon. She
used to go to tha meat-market person-'
ally and she examined every thing she
bought with tha eye of a Daniel come
to Judgement - She had - made-a study
of all the plain and fancy varieties of,
meat and the designing butcher could,
not sell ber the neck of a horse and say;
- It waa a haunch of venison. He couldn't
work off any old India rubber rooster
for a spring chicken. .. Mother was on
to every one of his curves, and if he
tried any funny business she read the
riot act to him In four languages.
"She , wasn't looking ' for the high
priced meats. She ' would come home
with a hog's backbone or a soupbone er
a lenghth of a cow's tall and get up
stews and rsgouta and soups that would
make a man'a whiskers cleave to the
roof of bis mouth. No family ever had
- better grub than we had. and when tha
butcher presented his bill father didn't
fall over in a swoon.
"Things are -vastly different now.
You never go to the meat market to
see what i. the dealer has on his rem
nant counter. You call him up by tele-.
phone and ask him to send out a quart
vl (fviiciiivuiv ana cnarfi tc tu
Mr. Jamesworthy, and when that afflic
ted gentleman sits up to eat the steak. ,
in question he doesn't know whether lis
a section of a doormat or a cork sole. -I
am not blaming you, my dear. You
are just like the rest of the women who
are playing at keeping house. Real
; housekeeping went out of fashion when
our mothers cashed In." '
- "Well, I'm going to try to do better,
since bearing the professor," said Mr.
Jamesworthy. v "Ha explained Just how
the American housewife can cut her ex
penses in two without sacrificing any
thing in the quality of her bill of fnre.
I am going to make an earnest effort
to follow his advice." . ' :
"You deserve praise and 'encourage
ment Mrs. Jamesworthy. As I aald. t
usually shle at professors, but It 1
possible that this one wears his he!
right side up with care. Any man who
goes around advising women to cut
down expenses la a success, whether hn
wears side whiskers or not:"
"Oh, I'm sure the professor Is a fin
man and all the women present "
Impressed by what-he said. I am ?;,
to try to- supply the table t rn'u .
lower expense. Of eourae 1" would in..
a better chance If I had that -
to the kitchen ",
' Buffering swlcooks!" r" r1 J
worthy. "Am I nver rot" v in .,r t ,
last of that extension? ' -re t"t t
bat end everslioesr