THE OREGON SUNDAY JOURNAL. PORTLAND, SUNDAY MORNING. JANUARY 21, 1912.
Health and Efficiency
' CONDUCTED FOR THE ' JOURNAL y LULJTYLE,V
' Questions by reader on subjects of general Interest pertaining to this eol
' mn will be Answered gladly by Mra. Little. All question should be addressed
to Mra. Ixj ra. c. LJttlepaj-a Oregon Journal, and o framed a to be answered
in a limited apace. .. . .L --,-''s v 's
1
Truth T6
pl)& Surtdd? Smite
Js Stranger - Than Fiction
VOL. 1.
NO. 9.
rORTLAJfDr JTAJT. 21, 1012.
T'
EDITED IN FUN BY
MILES OVERHOLT
I IB woman In Newark, New Jer. you.- turn away from them. In every
seyf who tha other day took her circumstance, condition or person along
life ly wallowlns; 18 grains Of your pathway, there la somewhat that Is
eulnlna la far from belnar tha rood and agreeable to you. Think on
first person to be killed by. qui- that and let tha unpleasant part of U Enttred at the postoffke as second-
nine. ; ene ainerea iron wi usuai qu- '"""f- . X,L" Z,,,t :..;: '..;clas matter but that' as tar at
him victim . ana wo nw o" .. ". the arrnnd rlim Mrs.
all at one and i intent, much. Do not talk too much, and when tBe got-
while the usual thin Is to takajt in or , ?MV7 pracuOT This naoerV wire efyic extendi
,... - ..." ,....- .,,-.-, t. breathfna? -exercises thla la a surer . ' uapct a wue bcitjvw ,
rw- '. ii.h. ' :"rhi..M Keep this up. day In and day out, year i ,
rif m3c wbV have T maie out. If you do this you V Telegraph. '
rr7i f therh. ln oJ time win tha health and
such study of drug polaoalngr that ha .tren.th veu osir. if ro hav. taa THR.WltATHF.P-.
Tasbieln the Km of taking .4 in cum? l'T iThere are quit a few turkeys and
T lodged. . Ho asserts that it was not ao . .,, nf n tanM,k! ik,t , r. and the dealers are offering some rare
SSJf -!.Sad LiWMnL.rifii Wnd- Maaticat. thoroughly bargains, so .it looks like you could in
v...v. ... . " J' :Z L. ........ ana Brink nothing- at meals or for two a pmcn can it - i - ,
' -' i'il" Vh! in. tf.t hour, afterward, rollow tha seasons FOWL WEATHER. , -
homa insane, as It was tha quinine that , aUaif that at rood that Bea., ;
was fed to them to ward off malaria. ,0nabla. But beware of too much sea- , - trnrrnDTAT T Ttrw --
; it is only two years ago last month sonlnar of your food' , - EDITORIAL LIKE.
' that a carload of erazy soldiers fronrth " " 7 . ' -r - . -
Philippines was taken from San Fran- o 'JL. - w " A man may lose his" fnendj, his
- cisto tbaTemment saylumatAna- ,,TVy,Pap.lar ' . . ANNA K. fy his reputation.: and then
linIi iwmT r7 ; nrinZ.,; I " ' cross oyer the lint into a foreign
; cupl1loaTAhafn country and Wl hi, .coffer, from
and V finally, accumnjate
J? ,nlna? lmo,t M rwrrly : " loua, But this does not touch the que, .happiness again; he may lose an eye,
?MrJi .ni-LivL' oriera tlon of hot water drlnklns; In caaes of Twit when he is separatedfrbm his
, eaa of quinine polaonln that andad In "7 Jjj .J 'luKVeJLr about,', and v words of comfort nd
InU sJTS wiirS.lLSK eTby a .wSH. was noseless.
eause of hi. whole trouble. Tha patient -f" " the coroner to sit oiKile remain
" ,"!:h1!: his face.He:had leaned oyer a
' T-v-t.w.n in.. f tff butas ln' w,thout th "P"4 to th tomacii. calf that was jnst learning to support
5Tw21 itself with the aid of a pail of milk,
pected It was hurUng met 1 was as VJZ.Jl! and. in a manner pecuHar to calres.
... i ., 7 . . T. . I. wui grow quiet" - i suaueniy.raiseu us ncaa. ana wncn
w-""1 ifSiifc'-IS! Ia"eeton In adulU may be treated the farmer tried to feel of his nose
fiom . to see how badly it was hurt, he had
to render myself Immune from the fever f w'" " dllfl to reach undeMha granary to do it ,
I took quinine dally In l" " to ye editor.!
?XrllZZV' nofe . great deal
sleaaed. -We wera told by our doctors fl" !rJw0f wt1? nU,h. anyway but. I had become sortiof
that the drug wa. a fin. preventive Jer a hot bath' This In a measure attached to '. it, and in a way it was
ringing In the eara. headache. dlMmeaa, wB7f
. grlP and biliousness. I became ,Tery yoTotltl n Wearin il whether U w" in tyle
nervous and l y .lgt failed me to such athm 5 wiii'no",, or not As I say. J nerer really had
fi'iliA1!?! 1 T". L, UJ "tro"e digesUon. but quite T the reverse! much use for it. and it used to et
furlouah aidJhavanever returned. l"Yrr'WW
' n .evfr fully r th lL. was prevalent, but
effect. of that campaign. I have auf- j V" !T'wrwu"mTO7 v at the same time I didn't want to
, t LOCAL AND KIND OP
PERSONAL
Charles . Harum of Seattle, a fat
man, was with us last week. . Char
ley is one of the fattest men we ever
got dose enough to to talk to,; too.
He said once when he was a boy he
went out stealing , watermelons with
the fellows and the farmer came out
and the I. other boys ran. Charley
couldn't run: he Was too fat. So he
laid down in the - melon ' patch and
acted like a melon, and the farmer
came along and thumped him.- All of
which sounds reasonable anyway. ;t x
Mr. ' Coffee of ' Tacoma and Mr.
avra-of New York were amongst us
last week. They had good grounds
for being here.' they being traveling
salesmen. " -r ' "
f fThe joke. " " T "
Henrir Bloch. a hotel manaeer of
Seattle,- was knocking around the
town Thursday. Henry say he was
born i here "just 'around the corner
on Second street," which doesn't seem
possible, but Henry says it's the truth.
What tnakea.it ao difficult to believe
is that ' it seems ' somehow like he
would be -too young to remember the
location. But mebbe he does, mebbe
he does.
fered , greatly with indigestion, consti
pation and heart disease. 1 am very weak
and nervous, excitable and- Ill-tempered,"
ao hasty that on tha spur or-the mo
ment I could commit murder or suicide.
TIT
HEN ' doctors differ let common part with it just yet, unless I could
. .n . jf(. ..... w... 1 ii . . T . t i . . 1
wu 7v uui dw gei mure man it was wona lor ii. .
? 'p .wr?.n- Vr- W. A.Evan. You can see with the naked ere
xiw conaucung- a neaitn aepart- -j. . . .. r
... - . that the benefit to mr face is scarce-
"rTT,1';1"! trentt of H. frequently -aya a goThlnff. thZgh Jy noticeable since the panic took
mind that I fcava left to keep ma from htk ,Z2 tnn l .55 ia I n. AiA hv. I f,r. th,
Z c"l "JlvV"",rr. ' t.ri health board foMe-rol: but there la a was fall of beauty, as you might say.
He came to my desk and called my at- ilxonSiZ ' J would geKfoohsh over and monkey
tention'to a mistake ln my accounts. nh m w with, and now I am afraid it "will
Suddenly I became so angry that I sh2iS32ort
lifted a heavy Iron Inkstand ready to 1,7 poor farmer softly raised
atrik hlm. At. tha critical moment ths du to Uria- . two fingers and said he would take
enormity or the deed flashed upon me too ry." ajittle ayrup in his'n, and we genUy
.i " . - ,r,: il er that tho doctor mlatabe. drowned a couple of bale of sorrow
riiaJ?. ..0 boand let it go at
1 ..rfo?rh.. sup.ernet what
clare. the doctor. The mora refined PWo"w! armomouaiy uT.iffletu you preach, remember the Equitable
-.,-axp.rl lheold
becomes in the suppression of acute dl- jn it skJn MtttWu caa be cured by down recently, was not insured." said
If,rUiy ,ffn."tioL tUh ata? w?ii the food supply, ana without a natural born fool to this here scribe
aurgval mutilations, tho, greater will m , .imn.ni,..i. A .1 a t a -
be the Increase In cancer. Insanity, tu- iT;,",,,! .7. 7v" .J T ih--:: ",cA."l,r "V- ful.u"V wu "
wrong, anvwav
Study the vital statistics
of
recent Wn,.M t ....
years snd you wlllflnd that this Is pre- ."IT L .l' ,1" ZT: " One dav I took a oaotfr uo
aSS s.. cohn y eur' meVey Ty eUmlna ml T&t Jay upon the sofa; ' .
acute diseases are proclaimed con-read and B f th dIeUry And I sat down to read the new
IH'J1. Acidity of the stomach and constl- While I was parching coffee. '
Stf .MvlB,fm u',-.rj: mo8t 'riuent cause, of "Poetry" in Milton, Or., Eagle.
XSlJLi.-. .i,- cause of scarlet fever and smallpox
fTV"' ir",6 y u. ? Th administration of Antitoxin to th.
school doctors themselves ought to put wK)d oonjmonIy. produces a rash. Con-
' them (. on "their guard against the sup- trary t0 the doctor's assertion, there is
FI f m'k'T bf-JruB8 an would th0 moat utlmate relation between the
. h",:uC?uli bu5. get.Br !"0ugb awy th. blood and the condition of
tiviu mo.r icWg w w"iw the ahin. 1 hava seen fnt fir R M
Torn Richardson has now reached
the pinochle of fame, a cigar having
been named after him. If it takes as
much breath to operate 'em as Tom
disoense .tegular. ttkewe.surmise a
jrs
fWFREDC.KBILY.
FIFTY YEARS FROM TODAY.
Mrv W. Snobbens, mayoress, has
hov. m7,irBSr Si . n.V,Un,S Copyrtghted. H12. by Fred C Kelly.) ons day Jeff Davis ,ot p and aaM:
DOys must be off the Streets by 7;30 , f W jASHINOTON, Jan. tft. Samuel "That man with th. wooden legt Ah,
p. m. Many instances have come to 1 A I Q- Btytha, political eavant and yes. poor fellow a lost his good
her knowledfre that V?r1 Vl omedUin for th. Saturday Even- lea; In a sawmill."
the atra I in t . 1 ? 1 I " m tatttog not long M And after that th. ' wooden legged
wie streets at all hours of the night i V - ago to Arnold Bennett, th. Eng-man might have talked watii Alton Ii.
nave been Mffncfiim l. At..'li4ii tAu.H.r Th. . ti iiAi-.i
age of 20,Vand the mayoress is de- tn "ho.P-nd Bn"tt remarked: . . I
tvrmnA . ... "wen, ui only way i can wora: is l
Ifi. -J Puf top to this condi- to .tick right at It. and I must say I
, , u ','"'";'.vw;,--:'-''!;V.tbat I turn out a tremendous amount- O
' - - in i in . ef mnv mrv- VMr. TVTiv. T nrrwfnrA
A fire in the 4(Vatnrv lVJt1nmf about SEO.OOO worda a rear!:
building wa .quickly ouenched last Tn dn t atartie Blyjthe, a.'
itaiT it
nisrht bv an atJncrr..; .ku .i.. h novelist expected them to.
v - -- " IBUlkt UVi
rroT" tne central fire atation,
damage. 7
W..1. rrv - i,hA...il .
O words a day h. remarked, candidly. .
'; , "That doesn't aeem Ilk. very much."
Not very much!" echoed the , Kn g-
4 The pioneers who came to his city Uhman. "WTiy, man, ln England they
in 19H will hold a reunion within a tnrT1 tot producing so much
"Tt. ..... . OMW . ......
tew uaj. neT win exnioit at that T f.v
time a dozen tve. said to he th nnl
ones in captivity. V, ' - , ?. r . '
n. , (fie UftTt71 , ... ..' ; 4
, . -VlAAMI"H.L 1 ayrf ft 1 .
Aw. pshaw." said Blytha. thlnkinar Parker la alecteA BraidanL but avarv-
of hi. newspaper days, "I used to write on. would still thtnk h. lost his leg
about 2,000,00 0- words a year and tel- in a sawmill. - - -n
graph. U all and yet my employers , . , . .r
never, aeemed to b. worried about ma tTncl. Jeff one. referred to a ludco
seeking' a Democratic nomination a
man of northern btrthaa a "Tank.
OUR OWN WALT MASON-
I asked. a man why he looked an wrkl t0 hw-
m A TIa oU It,1. H -i - tn . .1 i "''
hi? 1 P. M ' ? -Tr l. "C - Hand It to Senator Jeff Davis of Republican." Wflon Democrat thougH
naa. tie Said: ."1 cant light up my Arkanaas, for "unconventlonality. Lack he was, th. man might as well have
phlx; it is built wrong, mate: that a Wl praoeoent worne. jerr jjstis aoout knocked off bis campaign work right
what it is" And a T T,hK,A m f muoh as th. Parisian dope ln th. there and devoted th. rest of his time
w2LV i t,. 'IT 1 t -jTm :t7la book" worrl Igorrota. Just to playing charades with the children,
thought right then; I Said; ."111 can for Instance: Ha could hav. circulated facslmll. af-
this am il nff nn " ": T I ,M '."IS- On one of his aoeechmaklna- tnnra flH.vlta hrnnrhu v
- nr$$ Hl r
lot of people will awear off smoking
up about Lewiston way, that being
the burg the cigar are manufac
tured at. ' r
C W. Drinkwater of Drewsey was
splashing around in this town last
week. Mr. Drinkwater is aw, you
get put. He wasn't either.
Captain John Leader, a British sol
dier man. who was here 'tother day.
says Portland, S. A., and Moscow,
r-U-s-S-i-A, are the two greatest cit
ies in the country. Thanks for them
kind words. Cap. Same to you. and
lots of .'era. Lunnon is a pretty fair
hamlet, we are reliablv informed, but
have it your way, old top, have it
your way.
G. W. Hibbard of Index. Wash.
was here last week. Index, says Mr.
Hibbard, is right at-the front: which
we surmise is correct. We've always
found it so.
people cannot grin--if their looks thronrh Arkansas an admirer mad. him without convincing anyone that be
won't let the sunshine in whv let 'em prMBlt of. oat 14 w "t an An- wasn't a Yankee Republican, - Just aa
look like thev I hhTw J rm t-t Pln.' every day No. Uncle Jeff aald h. waa. w ,
iook like they dad-Wame please-- 7 goat of commerea, and of little valu. , v
tney own their looks: it is their own except as a keepsake. Jeff DavT haa Of another opponent Unci. Jeff said?
cheese. . So when I see a pilgnm "wer gone in for goat collecUng; !n "Why. If you were to pick up that f4
frown like a country jail in t toun-ct- h. care, almost nothtn at all fpr low by th. heels, you eould shak out
try town, why I never slao him oil Bat. But h. wished to be polite and" 100 railroad peases. If you elect many
the back and say; "Old ton take ud ST nis appreciation of the memento, men like him th. cost of Ilvln will be
the slack, and in a arin li W hrf 1 h.f lei him ro't nt h into ao high that HH cost tl to twist a
i;ir.V. J 1 ouha.d h b with Mm when h. drov. to pig. talL" . -
?",?'t! 1,,T POcketW.vnth a pair the .tatlon ln th. town where he had And strong men tn the mudlanoa sol-
ot lit. I pass htm by with his look hn speaking, and then and there omnly nodded their heads.
of woe for fear he'll tell me where Phued said goat in the baggage ear, - ,
to go. And so I say, if you've got to ?ound 'or.Lu.M Rock- n hl "rlTOl. v Admiral George Dewey ha. Just en.
preach, don't talk to all within your iVJ? c t7. tfcl" JefC dr0T hu a11 n takm oar. of hia health,
reach. Go find a crowd that is feel- Vl1 up ,n.to th ,ront 1 ot th r' For tw" ram "T atays away from
in fit- tell "eiS f,n.,!ll . P8t"vrf Pwiger. who were doing more dinner, than any prominent man
11 IL 1 u ttnnT y"n 1,11 the7 eurfw-shall-not-rlng turn with strapa. ln Washington. He desires to ltv. for
wu-n mcy ve poi a groucn, ana oaa. u atana aiongaia. of the mo- aome years yet, and haa figured It out
give your thought a twist; tell mor- tonnan. Now, goats, without permits, that tho best way to do this la to keep
bid tales like a Socialist That' the wer discouraged from riding on street awy from formal dinners and lead th.
way to hit the highest points as you cfrE b.a"a" c d such tn th. simple Itf Each r week his desk is
creak through life with your achinor fi" rkaM; but n. Uvlng human ewamped-wlthlnvitatlons to dinners,
ioints. I?s the cnrV road thA ll t?er!aboUTtl.wj;u14 bav Optioned th. not only In Washington, but at various
rPh u7 II i r 1 llKht I 3'" Davl to brin ,ft rxlnti over th. country, and h. turn,
reacn success. Huh, dont I know? borne In a sttet car, drosky, Pullman thera all down. Every once In a while
Weilr-A-rather-guest 1 compartment, palanquin m rT thr ha gtt Invl'd to a dler that ba.
vehicle he might choose. Ii Vnel. Jeff really wishes he might attend, but h. "
LAY ON THE PRUNE. ' w,r " on traln averybody would stay away rather than "break hi. rule
A lonely prune in a boarding-house " .7 '"-v1 ifr?ttent,r ?,r,n to dinner engagementa.i If ho
On a'mirht when furies walked rtve through the struts of an Arkan- went to on, dinner and declined to go
aZV- "T7.. . ?M town with a party of chickens, to the next one. peopl. would aet mad.
aVa i. 1. s m a . J,i Y Douna tmcb ch- wung careleasly at him and accuse him of being Htuck
I say it rose from its liquid bed
And said O sure, it said: y
Trn a spavined, locoed piece of fruit
That was once as bright and arav
1 . . 1 - - . 1 uwui. n 1 Mam xHij, .-Anai ana an occasions 1
Asa winsome lass in a new spring suit, would be as t utile as trying to explain acceptance ot a White House Invitation
vsq a origin sunsniny aay:
Once I was happy, joyous, free
As the bumblebees that hum,
And folk would gaze into my tree
And call me a green gage plum.
But I fell like Adam fell, by heck,
When they picked me for a orune.
And a gmk took me by my childish navnr.iosi ma regular leg while fight- Tea." aald -Williams, "I am going
neck ,a v onieuerai. army, a leg to ravor it tor two reason. : First, be
On a summer afternoon. ,"uc,.c,I2!im"t,u,e!! tIon the treaty haa not been lived up
Then thev made me drr as a desert I ' JL.70.r Bd h m,ght hVB to- na con1. hecaus. the treaty haa
inen n,,a me arf flesert been saocessful ln his campaign, but been lived up to," . ' . ,
Till a landlord pounced on me:
He $ot me stewed in a hi-yu style .w
With folk from my family tree.
Ah, that was three long years sgo,
But no one wants me now;
That's why I'm all chock full of woe
Like a corn-fed mooley cow.
Nobody loves me, hully gee;
That s whv I keen this souse.
Twas cruel fate that carried me .
To a cheap-skate boarding-house."
on top of hi. back. People along Mis up.'
ngnt or way mow that he has simply There la just one dinner that Dewey
received a token of esteem from aeon- Is certain to attend, and that is th.
stltuent annual banquet held on May 1 of th.
. ManUa Bay society, made up of .ffi-
To question the tpoken or written ear. who took part In tha battle rt
word of Jeff Davl. ln his bom. state Manila Bay. That and an occasional
iu uiniun( t magasin. poerry. J.n compn.. tn. social life er this war
can aay pretty much anything ha care, hero who would be one of the greatest
to and his constituents merely 00m- social lions ln town.
tnent about as follows: -.
"If. trua too. Didn't Jeff Davl. aay John Sharp -William, was asked by.
so himself r on. of his fellow senators If he pur-.
In on. eampalgn a candidate on the poaed to vote for the resolution to abro-
opposition ticket had a wooden lea, gate the treaty with Russia. . .
AS THE CARTOONISTS VIEW CURRENT EVENTS
1
tlve.
Pratt refers to It aa typical) Inflamed
Her is what Dr. Mark A. Rodgers of k. . r.nm.n
Tucson found (Charities and Commons:) ,0wed bjr a MVere diarrhoea,. Blood ana
After an experience In the desert cover- Mel.vw, together simply transferred the
ing eleven yearsi and severs thousand d,BeaM ft. 0M ,ectloa of tne akln t0
cases of tuberculosis, he noted-that a ,nother for mucous membranes ar.
- large 1 percentage ui 1110 case aevoiup skin.
ayrmg conva escenc. irom typnom pneu- Rashe. are sometimes brought out by
monU. pleurisy, grip, malaria, measles, ,edlcines. such as saraaparllta.
whf puny5h' ,cr,et 'ever' 1,Ihtnerl" A case of this kind once caused a whole
aud childbirth. t - . lu" sale vaccination raid in Philadelphia. A
It must be remembered that these are negrxk feU j need of aprihgf medicine
convalescences after drug treatment, ahd wallt t0 a drUB8tore and purchased
rather than natural : treatment t The a bottj. of ,areapariUa and took several
acuta disease must be checked by ome ,arKe d0,es of ,t Tha M,ult wa, a
unnatural practice beforft It can b, glorious rash, and relief. Th. health
transformed into tuberculosis, or, any oflo9 discovered Im. vaccinated him,
other of the advanced forms of disease. huiitied hint to th pest house, and lm
Aoute diseaae is simple; needs, fasting, mediately on a beautiful spring morn
rest, quiet air and water. These na- lng (May 6 19e8) a Sunday mornlns
Jural, agencies asaUt th. organism An wnen peopl, alept jater than usual, a
Its cleansing effort Drugs paralyse the cordori of police with ropes surrounded
.organism, and this paralysis is taken a dosen Philadelphia "squares" and vac
for eure When th. system ralltoaW is c,nated every man. woman and child ln
y t0 on IT0"10 tor ide the enclosure, some fourteen thou-
'TwJi iZ VlAcnZm i th,l fe,:r,tjr,0f md People all told. The actual facta
tha blow that has been dealt to the vital i.win.i , ...
Iff
HAT ahall I eat to gain flesh
writer and given to the world ln a Phil
adelphia weekly at the time
and strength? I hava always
, been more or . less troubled
with constipation.?: Two years i
ago i was operated on for ap-
. pendltltls. Blnce then iwaa lor A-tlme-
- on a diet like that given to consump
tives, chiefly raw eggs and milk, though .'
I am told my lungs, are . sound, and I "
hava no cough or foverj My figure is.
sllknT and,-1 am not strong. My age -V
Is ts,,;;:F;.-;;:v S?. MTRAR.
)'.''' ..V-Vj-'r-'- m 1 'A
Tour problem la not a mere question '
.of what to eat: It ia a question of how
to extract nourishment trom your food. "
.Tou must positively discard corsets and ,
belts and go to work, to enlarge your
chest and walBt, by breathing exerolses
and by abdominal exercises in addition -.
to abdominal breathing. Work your ab
dominal muscles by their own action In
all possible ways. .Practice deep, slow
breathing for fiver minutes at a time,
several times a day,. Sleep all you cd
Work Out doors If possible s Or If not,
walk for half an hour twice a day, at a
brisk gait chest up and legs firm. Drink
lx to tenlaiflea cf-yater. In the aiL
hours, the larger part of It before you
eat breakfast. . . Make your breakfast
Upon fruit, or fruit and mtlk or cream.
Having lost an "important part of
.your Internal, economy assuming that
i your appendix was really removed
you must see to It that bowel cloRglnv
food and hablta are not Indulged In. ' 1
,Two mula a day besides a fruit meal
should be your limit henceforth. : Cul
tivate a happy frame of mind, by dwel
ling on the thin, you- like and avoid
ing! thought of the things you dislike
or fear. V.'bou the Jattar rl-- before
.IMU"" 'raaaa -M r
;,, - ATLANTA. JOTOKI, " , CltlCAOO EVtKTMO -r:'A ' ' V" i 1 --
I J
' U whose portrm ; --i: ' i 'sSfy . .Vv- cAaws--.
weigh about half a ton too much, town. ; I managed to climb up on the'
doctor," said Balderdlsh, "and I load,1 although It wa. about 40 feet
want you to prescribe some dope high, and when I was nicely settled
that will cut down my circum- in the hay something broke about th.
7, ana in. nam ran away ana
"Common sense treatment Is the only upset the wagon, and the whole load
thing for obesity," replied the doctor, same down on top of roe. and th.
There' no use of taking drugs. You'll wagon on top of th. load. Tou can
have to diet yourself and take plenty argue for three montha, doe, but you'd
f exercise." never convince me that exercise Is vv
"That's the same old dreary cheat- curs for obesity,
nut I hear from every doctor. What's "After I got over that experience I
the u. of your medical science if you started for another ramble ln the counJ
-can't mix up som. liniment that" will try. I was bound that you shouldn't
take the fat of ft Last spring you be able to aay I had neglected your
sprung that exercise gag on me, and advice. I hoofed, It about H miles and
I went and blew myself for a horse and was completely out of wind, so I
buggy and took a ride every evening, thought I'd take a -short eut back'
and It didn't do a bit of good, I gained ' through the fields, and a bull took af tr
flesh rather than lost It" me and chased me all over tho county
"Riding ln a buggy Isn't exercise, and finally pushed ma through a, barbe.i
Tou should take long walks." , wire fence with hi. horns, If yon could
"That's what you told me last spring, have seen ma when I got back to town
I wa. anxious to oblige, so I started you wouldn't have offered 10 cents for
out early one morning to walk five me. t If I had kepi up that walking
miles In the country, I hadn't got three exercise a few more day. I'd hav. been
block, before a motorcyclist ran over In a box."
(me and .left me a total loss. I was "All you . ten ' me, Balderdten, is no:
In bed for a week. When I was on my argument against walking. Yon
feet again I tried another long walk, mightn't have another . accident In 10
being anxious to give your treatment years. Tou don't have to go to the
a fair trial. I pushed myself about 10 country. Walk up and down th. street.
miles Into the country, and then played In town." I
out, and a farmer cam. along on a "I tried that, too, doc, and It dldnt
load. of hay, and offered me a rid, to work. I didn't want my friends to see
: : . ... ; me chasing myself around as though I
naa gone catty, so I took a few walks
after dark. Somebody on Lemon ave
nue had left a coal hole Open, and I
walked Into It. It was a pretty largo
-eoal hole- and I wwttr -right through-rt -and
landed on a pile of empty boxes. '
and the racket brought the police, who
puuea me out and then gave me a ride
to the police station. .
f "The next night 1 tried It again,-and
walked until I was tired, and then
leaned against a residence to get my
breath. Somebody thoughtlessly dropped
a photograph album from a window
overhead, and I caught It with my dom.
i of thought The cover of that album
had brass corners. and I can show
you the dent In my skull where thv
bit It No, sir, I've had all th. walklnaj
exercise I want. , Tou'll have to pre
scribe something easier." .
"WelU . let's talk about your diet
What are you eating now?" t ,
'"Never you 1 mlml what I'm entln.
You waint to get a list of; the thlnas
f I like to eat and then you'll tell nut
to cut them out and eat baled straw.
' I don't want any advice about exerris
or dieting.- I -want a bottle of dor.
so I can take a teaspoonfui after ex-h
meal and before retiring, and lingi:i
'I'm getting willowy."
, v "Go home and take a, good long !rfn' ,
from .th. kerosene can," said tt i'-.
i tor, impatiently, "and then set fire l
your breath,"
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