Editorial' pAGte
OF 1 HE JOURNAL.
l
THE JOURNAL
' ' AM HSirtllDUIT '""
IX . JACKBON.
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la judging others, mas
; labors to no purpose, com '
monly . cm. Bad easily sins;
bat In examining and judging
, hlrnaelf, he is always -wisely '
and usefully ; employtov '
Thomas altemple. -
INEFFICIENT DETECTIVES..
SIX MONTHS AGO Julius Kuhn,
.'Van cast side saloonkeeper, was
. murdered in cold blood by a
masked man who entered the saloon
-v. and shot him down. As in so many
' other instances of crimes of violence
committed . in , Portland in - recent
years, the police failed to discover the
murderer, A few days of half-heart
ed search, an arrest of a man who
. was subsequently declared innocent,
-. and then the quest was. abandoned.
' Kuhn V murder was , placed . on the
, long list of -. "unsolved mysteries"
, which reflect so much discredit on
' Portland's police department Even
j. the reward offered for the detection
f, the murderer failed to stir the de-
tecthres to anything like a prolonged'
, or intelligent effort to bring him toJ
justice. ;..:;:,,.:.:.'Av-.;
. A few days .ago, when six months
had rolled by and the acent of the
murderer had frown cold, a spas
modic effort waa made to revive the
v case and gather up the clues: which
the - sleuths' ' had allowed to - slip
through their" fingers at the time of
their first investigation. But , even
this belated attempt ' to " solve the
crime, has now been' abandoned and
all' hope of bringing the murderer to
- justice seeme to be at an end. Un
, less' some unexpected chance should
"accomplish what the police have, been
unable to do, the crime will go un
' punished. -. . . . - , , , ',r -
As in the Van Dran case, there ws
aa utter lack of thorough, intelligent,
1 -VBtematie search Immediatelv - noon
' the commission of the crime.. Suchl
search would in all probability have
aolved the mystery of both of these
. murders. '; Until there is a radical
change in either the methods or the
personnel , of "Portland's detective
. force, it is' Idle to expect any better
results than have been obtained in
- the past
RAILROAD PR0MISE3.
ffTHE PEOPLE of Oregon long
I . became wise enough' to
. .readily interpret some of the
phenomena of the transportation
.business, of their atate. They
knew, for instance, when their- docks
.were groaning under the tons of mer
chandise waiting shipment to foreign
' points that a high official of the steam
ship company would appear with a
flattering tale of the growth . of the
commonwealth' and a story bright
with the hope ofjncreased tonnage to
' Jbesr' our products , to remunerative
' markets. 'When the farmers' wheat
lay at the railroad crossings and aid-
' frigs, far from the elevators for which
they were destined,' the same airen
aong has been sung: "Oregon's mar-
' velous development is the wonder of
.- the nation, and cars will be provided
to transport her rich harvests. ' -
'.When? 1 , -
When the markets cl the country
are gUttled with the products of other
states; when prices have fallen in in-
... evitable response to the law of sup
ply and demand.
- A few daya ago a high official of
' one of our railroads told the people
of Oregon that he was astonished at
our evidencea of prosperity, and that
hia corporation had in mind an im
mediate betterment of, transportation
. facilities. What this "'"was to be he
left to conjecture, but the public
looked about for evidences of a car
' shortage arid it. appeared.
' Lane county it Buffering' from a
. lack of transportation facilities. Her
great timber industry is threatened;
hundreds of men , are ' likely to be
thrown out of work; and one of
the chief sources of her prosperity is
endangered because there arc no cars
to take the lumber from the, tnilla.
This condition followed immediately
On the avowed knowledge of our won
derful growth and the need of better
transportation facilities. .. '
. . The coincidence f promise and
thortage has been noted for, .years.J
a- , v ' - V--
The people of' Oregon have come to
note with alarm the pretence here of
the i officials of our transportation
companies inevitably hardship fol
lows, as the seven lean years succeed
the fat years in Egypt. '.V . .
What are the people going to do
about it? -That is what the trans
portation companies .ask. The peo
ple of Oregon ahould . repeat the
question to themselves until . it' an
swert itself. , , ''v '. .
THE - IRRIGATION CONGRESS.
HE next .national irrigation
congress will ' meet in Boite
on September 3. '.' A :. -v.--.
Oregon ahould be well represented
there. In our, Lewis and Clark fair
few states were so well represented
aa Idaho. '. -
Its building was one of the most ar
tistic in the whole fair and .visitors
were received with most cordial hos
pitality. It is but fitting that Oregon
should ' show ' its appreciation by a
generous representation in the com
ing congress. :
We cordially indorse what the East
Oregoniaa taya: '
The Mont of Idaho ahould have the
haartlcat co-operation of tha peopla ot
Oracon la entartainlne the National Ir
rtratlon congraas which maaU at Bojsa
on Septambar I.
Thla eonaraaa will brine to tha north
west one of the flnaat bodies of a.atarn
ers that it is poaalble to ft toerathar la
a common purpoaa. .fubllo ofilclala,
vovornment azperta, prominent laglala
tora, laadlna journaliata and foralm rep-
rajbfttAlvaai will . all flAnmMlfe. t
Botaa to take part in tha prooaadlnaa or
thla fronareaa. - t
Thla maana advertlaemant for tha
weat , Brary ona of the dalefatae-atnd.
visiters who coma to Bolae and see
Irritation at !ta hairht In tha splendid
dlatrlcte of Idaho, will baooma a booatar
for lrtlaation. It maana Influanoa In
eonaToaav advartlsament from tha press
of the aaat and atronrer friendship be
twaan the aaatarn and weatern paoplla.
Whatever oomae to Idaho from the lr
rlaatlon oonrraaa will ba aauallr ahArad
by Oreron and other arid atataa. Tha
Intaraata af tha arid atatea are Identical.
Therefore tha entire weat, and especially
the state of Oregon, ahould Offer Idaho
every aaelatance and fullest eo-eparatloa
la entertaining- tha visiters.
Tha Oret-on dalegatea ahould organise
before leaving- the atate and go to Boise
with an organisation and a purpoaa. Tha
atate association should call tha dele
gates from every portion of tha atate
together, either before going to Idaho,
or else at Boise ton tha day previous to
tha opening of tha congress, and then go
Into the congress with oolora flying and
forces organised.
It is with the liveliest feeling of
gratification that we read the inter-J
view with Mri. Longworth.ln which
that close student of the cauaea of in
ternational comity .Informs us that
Europe's love for America amounts
to psitionate worship. Mrs. Long
worth's opportunities for discovering
the 'inmost ' secrets of, the European
heart were, far greater' than . those of
her 'talented " husband, whose . pes
simistic observations ofl the effect of
our canned foods on the royal tem
pers are unworthy of 'serious consid
eration. . ...... V: Y4' . V '
: t i '- ;v.
. A' railroad president, who is natur
ally Irritated at the congressional im
pertinence that would meddle with
his business, says if the people , do
"not like to pay present rates, the
people can walk." From his stand
point, hit conclusions are clothed in
wisdom.- At the aame time, a little
healthy competition along the right
of way of Mr. Milton H. Smith's line
would change his viewpoint, and this
would be especially true if Uncle Sam
were the manager of the new road.
While the Jews sit amid the ruins
of their dismantled homes, - nursing
their wounds, and mourning the
children who Are not, they watch the
Russians kill ' esch other, and say:
"Let brotherly love continue."
; It is said that Walter Wellman hat
given up hit idea of making his dash
to the north pole this year, which
tuggetts the thought thst something
mutt, have delayed the preparationt
for tending out the relief expedition.
The Louisville Post must be cred
ited with this squib: "It was real un
gallant of that Virginia woman not to
accept ,ihe apology of the man who
waa hanged for killing her husband."
Portland fint will be interested Jn
knowing that all the latett books on
social etiquette ' say the spectators
should not go for to tlug the umpire
at any stage of the game.
1. ;; " . ';'-:
The caar ahould amend the laws of
Russia, declaring a closed season for
policemen.' '. - - , ' .
' -Thia silence of Teddy' Is terrible.
And Bryan is still opening his mouth.
Where,
Shaw? ,
O where, " is Secretary
It's Bryan, the Man.
Democrat at Work.
The weetern division of the Demo
cratic congressional campaign commit
tee has opened headquarters In Chicago.
James T. Lloyd of Missouri Is In
charge, nastated by Congressman Henry"
T. Ralney of Illinois. The territory In
eludea Ohio and all northern atatea weat
of It and ail autre weat of tha Missis
sippi rtver oaaeot' Texas. Arkanaaa and
Xaoulslaoa, . '
What I Portland". GreatcR Nee j? '
MEMBERS OP CITY COUNCIL TELL JOURNAL READERS
2. . WHAT WOULD IMPROVE ROSE CITY. . ( - -' -J
Irtprovementa: D. J. Kellaher.
"More parks, water and good atreeta,"
aald Councilman IX J. Kellaher. "Steps
ahould be taken immediately to- aeeure
tha SO acrea on top of Mount Tabor for
reservoir and para . purpoaea. xne
propoeltioB should be aubmltted to tha
people at the June election. We need
thla traot and now la tha time to get It.
The top of "Mount Tabor Is (00 feet
above the .city. An excavation of SOt
feet would be aeeesaarr to construct a
reservoir and that would leave the wa
ter. 400 feet above tha city. Another
pipe line should bo brought In from Bull
Run and . with . thla accomplished wo
could get enough power . out of that
400-foot head to furnish electrlo lights
for the entire .etty.
- "We need the park room also. It Is
practically the only available place In
the city for a park. '-The scenery there
grand.; better -even than at the City
park. I think It Imperative that the
people act on this matter In Jane.
"The biggest difficulties with our
streets' are that those leading to and
from the' east aide are in deplorable
condition Tha atreete leading In from
the east side suburbs have been neg
lected, and In many oases not opened at
alL All the streets ought to be opened
through from the river to the city
limits.
"OuV graateat Improvement has been
the Ilia All the property that has
been Improved by permanent fills has.
quadrupled In value. Thla haa been
demonatratad, and It aeema strange that
any person should object to this sort
of Improvement when It la of such great
value to his property.
"But we need only to continue these
Improvements and do away with the
elevated roadway a and the aaat aide of
the city will take care' of Itself. In I
Wkat Rockefeller CoulJ; Do
OPEN LETTER TO
Opes lveets te a femioaatra.
Norway. Or- Aus It. To the Editor
of The Journal I send herewith, dupli
cate of a letter I will mail to John D.
Rockefeller and truat you eaa make use
of It Bespectfully,
CHART.KH A KEBAB. :
Mn John D. Rockefeller, Cleveland. O.
My' Dear Sin I read In recant press
dispatches of . your return tej America
after a few tnonthe apant abroad In
quest of health and of your determina
tion to give up tha control of the Stand
ard Oil company, and to and your daya
among your neighbors on tha golf links.1
The aama authority credits you with a
desire to cultivate your fellows And with
having made the observation, that there
la mora good tnan baa in tno woria, ana
that everything la for good In the end.
even, trusts. ... -
rent enis 1 am pnvuegea xo inrer
that you have awakened to a proper ap
preciation and realisation or your power
for good and of the obligation placed
upon you to make tha most -of ' your
stewardship while your wealth Is atlll
in your hands, to the and that tha whole
world shall profit by your philanthropy.
In fancy I can see you attempting to
out-Carnegie. Carnegie In aoma great
benevolent enterprise made possible by
the . acquisition . of 11.000.000,000 and
rearing great walla Of masonry tTer-
petuate your name- among your fellow
men. ... .. ' - ' '
If I have rightly anticipated yon. I
trust that you will not make Carnegie's
mistake of rldUig a single hobby and
of having strings tied .to each bequest.
In the desire for personal aggrandise
ment Carnegie has overreached himself.
and the great common people, who have
little leisure In tha struggle lor bread to
patronise bis libraries, give him no
credit of . an ' eye single te their bat-
Urm.nl. and avow that., tha money
should have been returned to tha work-
lngmen who - earned it or expended for
their personal benefit.
, If you could only be made to feel the
pulse of the labor world and ba filled
with the desire to do the greatest pos
sible good with your glgantto fortune
that any man could do, I can foreshadow
for you a name that will live In history
forever, tdke the Dioscuri of old. when
you leave this mundane sphere you can
take your place among the stars, the
brightest In the constellation. -
MAn alive, what a power tor good you
do bold, and how potent can ba your
Influence If your money la only properly
used and yon fulfill the obfllgatlone
thrust upon you! .
Other great financiers have felt It
obligatory to do something for society
and have reared glgantlo piles of marble
and granite Intended as. an. Institution
of learning for struggling young men
and- a monument te tha thrift and good
fellowship of the donor, but In every
case the men who have made It poaalble
for them to amass such great wealth
have been overlooked and derive no
benefit. The Chicago -university Is a
monument to the thrift and enterprise
and benevolence of Philip V. Armour,
the great porkpacker. but It'a dollars
to doughnuts that none of tha real pork
packers of. his yard has profited by his
philanthropy. ' " -
The Iceland Stanford university Is a
mammoth structure reared to the
memory of a rich man's son, but only
rich men's none were enabled to attend
it, and the fates, aa if deprecating auch a
Chinese Marriage Superstitions.
From the Washington Star.'
No other country hss so many super
stitions about marriage aa China. The
Chinese never marry within a hundred
days after a death haa taken place in
tha family of either tne Driae or groom,
Tor If they do they believe domeetle
troubles ere sure to follow. .
There seems to be ne reason for this
belief, And the Chinese do not attempt
to explain It out are willing te let It go
as an undisputed fact "
a Chinees bride mar be Brought te
the house- of the groom while there Ie e
coffin In the house, but not within 100
days after It haa been taken out
If a bride breaks tha heel of her shoe
while aha fa, going frpm her father's
to her husband's home it Is ominous of
unhapplnese to her new relations. -
, Increase of Exports. ''
The department of eommeree and la
bor calls attention to the fact that al
though the exports from the United
States during If 01 exceeded those of
any prevloue ' ysar, tha exports of
that part of tha present fiscal year of
which statistics have been received are
$io.ooo,eoo in excess of those of the
corresponding period 'of 1001.
The Imports of the fiscal year of IIOI
ware also greater than In any previous
year, yet the Import figures for the eight
months ending with February, ltOt, are
l7A0poa00. greater, fhas these Pi M"
w 'xavj'' .a,yjseye)K-swy
D. J. Kellaher.
fact unlaas It la badly abused It will
more than take care of Itself.
"And while we are getting a park and
reservoir an Mount Tabor and perma
nent fills where elevated roedwAya now
are, we ahould have a ehaln of boule
vards extending all around the city.' The
boulevarda era for tha moat part In ex.
latence now. - All they .need le Improve
ment and care, and we ought to. give
them that" v - . '
A BILLIONAIRE. :
useless waate of money, have caused Its
walla te crumble, and fall to tha earth.
Uow faw among tha breadwinners ot
the country ean take advantage of tha
philanthropy of Stephen Otrard. George
Peabody or other multi-mllllanatrea who
have established' or -endowed colleges I
. Now,, suppose you bear all this In
mind and become the friend. of the la
boring man by erecting working men's
and women's colleges In every state In
the Union. At an outlay of 180,000
you eould erect a suitable rock or brick
college for the accommodation ot 400
students and 150.000 more would endow
It with It scholarships for four yearn.
Other millionaires lu the tooallty fa
vored would assist other deserving la
borers and fill the college. . By the ex
penditure of 1100,000.000 you eould thua
establish 1,000 Institutions of learning,
an average of 30 In each atate and ter
ritory, and local prtda would keep them
up after you had furnished the nucleus.
Think of tha benefits . that would ac
crue from thla wise disposition of your
wealth.'. " v 1 - -
-Fifty million -more eould be advan
tageously expended for the -erection of
1.000 buildings to be used aa combina
tion night schools and boarding-houses.
The board money would pay the run
ning expenses of each school. - Equipped
with baths, gymnasiums, libraries and
parks, these .Institutions .would be pa
tronised by all self-respecting young
laborers who have no homes of their
own. - t would be preferable to the or
dinary boarding-house ' with Its ' ill
ventilated sleeping apartments and Its
other poor accommodations and food.
And you might gain a victory for tem
perance and morality by requiring the
occupants to abstain from the use of
alcoholio beverages and tobacco. -
Another fSO.OOO.OOO could be wisely
expendsd for walled temperance villas
in each atate, where the Inebriate and
his family eould find a safe retreat from
the vlcea and temptations of the city.
An unlimited amount of money eould
be apant In establishing eoldnles ot
worklngmen la the suburbs of Industrial
and manufacturing cities industrial
communities connected by motorllne
with the factories and. tha trade eentera
and need for residence purposes only,
with the addition of parks, baths, gymna
siums, and reading r6ms for tha recrea
tion of the tired workers. With saloons
and gambling houses prohibited, the ef
fect of these homo craft villages would
be salutary.
If you accomplish all ' of this with
your, millions, can you not sea the ulti
mate result T Tou will ba hailed as the
financial savior of the world. More
than that, you would be the lever that
would- lift the world up out of its hoDe-
less rut of selfishness, greed, gain, pil
lage and crimes of every character to
the light of something grander, nobler
and truer. Everybody would get a bet
ter conception of Ufa and be persuaded
to make the most Of It while they live.
Can you map out for youraelf a great
er mission than thlsT Such great wealth
as you have been privileged by fate to
amass was never Intended for relatives
to quarrel ever and expend la riotous
ness and high living. - ,- - ... .
Tou are the rook from whloH other
atones can be atrewa that will enable
the multitude to step heavenward. Ood
grant that you will be able to see your
power and act accordingly, and I be
speak for you a name that will live in
song and , story until time Is lost la
eternity. O. A. REESBL
corresponding pertodT of the last fiscal
rear. ., : .- .
The exports of manufactures were
Ht.000.000 in excees of tha total for-the
corresponding period of the prevloue
year. The Imports of . manufacturers'
materials for use In manufacturing
products In the United Statee shows for
the eight months ending with February
a total of 1104.000,000 agalnet 1214,
000,000 In the earns months of the pre
vious fiscal year, while the class ' "ar
tlclee wholly or partially manufactured
for use as materials la the mannfacturea
and .mechanic arte" bhows a total of
111 J.OOO.OOO against 11,000,000 of the
same months ot last year.
. The rapid growth In the exportation
of manufactures la ahown In tha fact
that tha February exports In 1100 were
nearly three times as great aa those of
lift and 17,000.000 greater than thoae
of February, IMS.
- . Oam a Bird 'a Board. ,
' One of the most amusing eases ever
tried In Delaware eame up before Mag
istrate Broman In Wilmington. - Moeee
Holmes, A negro, iued Anderson Toung.
also a negro, for the possession of his
game cock. 'Toung admitted, possession,
but demanded It cents for the "board
and lodging" of the fowl. , The magis
trate looked through law books- galore
and waa nonplussed. He compromised
the esse by making Holmes pay. 40 eents
for the fowl'e board, The testimony
wm Wery anJmeedv
A Little N
onsense
, .Contempt. to Burn. ' . ,
A John Philip Souse was condemning
the law that allows oertaln talking ma
chine companies to make records of his
famous marches and sell them broad-
oast without paying him a single penny
lor tne privilege . .
-J have only contempt for such a law
as that," aald the great bandmaster,
"When I think of the Injustice of it I
boll over with contempt- I remind my-
self of a washlngtonian who was baled
before a magistrate for committing a
uulsanee. .
f "Tha Waahlngtonlan had eommltted
no nuisance, but nevertheless the de
cision went against him, and he was
naturally Incensed. Forgetting himself,
he told the magistrate-what he thought
of him. and was fined IS for contempt.
"lie produced a 110 bill to pay the
line with. The clerk took It : searched
his drawer, then made aa If to hand the
bill eeehr-egmin. . . : , ;:v.
T have no change," he aald.
""Oh. naver mind about the change.'
snorted my friend. 'Keep It I'll take
It out In contempt' "
; 8he Gave Herself Away. '
Robert ' 'Watchorn. the well known
commissioner ot Immigration, haa made
a aympathetio and thorough study bt
the Immigrant .typea that reach New
York. .. , - .'
Discussing these typee the other day,
ne saia: -
"The most -naive are the Germans
from ' the smaller and remoter statea
They have the eharmtngly simple and
quaint minds of children. -
A beautiful i German girl dlsem
barked - here the other day. She waa
tall and strong, blue-eyed and yellow-
haired.. She wanted to know at once If
there were any letters for her..
The ' postmaster at - the pier, after
getting her name, said, by way of a
joke: . ," 1
""la it a business or a love letter
that you espectr - r
-"The girl faltered:
"A buelness letter.' ,
"Well, there's nothing here.' said
the man,- after looking ever the assort
ment .- . . 1 .-
"The girl hesitated. Then, blushing
aa red aa a rosa aha aald:
' "Would you mind Just looking among
the love letters now, alrf " --
'.-' V
Popular Need.
"X like Socialism fine," said the hon
est and apparently unromantio me
chanic, "but I don't want to give up my
Sunday paper." v-
Qlve up - your Sunday paper." said
the agitator; "I don't see how Socialism
la going to affect your reading, matter r'
"Maybe It' won't yours," replied the
victim -of capital, "but I've got so ac
customed to reading 'Snappy Doings In
LPraart Setr-Thoy Bump the Bumps In
the vandergrouid - Dlnlng-Hoom, and
"Mrs. Astorbllf s Gems; She Hse Enough
to Fill a Wash Basin.' and 'Life His
tories of the Eighty Peeresses Who
Ware Members of the-Original Floro-
dora Sextet' end all such like., that I
dunno what I'd do If you was to remove
the pampered classes." . . , , .
Thanka. ; 1. '. ,
John Rldgley Carter, secretary of the
American embassy at London, was pilot
ing some American friends through .the
museum at Hastings, when he observed
an unhappy attendant wearing a mili
tary uniform, with a helmet from which
a ehln-strap hung, at whom an Inquisi
tive tourist waa firing all manner of
silly questions. , . -r--The
tourist's last question was, "Say.
what Is that strap under your chin forT"
The attendant sighed. "The strap Is
to reef my Jaw when I get tired an
swering questions," said he. ,
Graceful .and Gallant
It Is reasonably safe to assume that
tha. late Henry Harland, the novelist
was seldom kept after school in hie
boyhood. - ' i . ,
Among . Harland'a early teachers was
a charming young lady, who called him
up In class one morning and aald. to
him: ..... ..
"Henry, name some of the chief beau
ties of education."
"Schoolmistresses," tha boy answered,
smiling Into his teacher'e pretty eyes.
Letters
For the Boys.
' Portland. Aug. 10. To the Editor of
The Journal In last Sunday's Journal
the question, "What, would you do If
you had Sage'B millions!" was discussed
by several prominent eltlsens la a very
Interesting way.- The . thought 'sug
gested by Judge Fraxer, of Investing
part In making better .- conditions Xor
boys, appeals to tne. .
I have often wondered' why men of
wealth did not aee the possibilities for
good-la establishing manual training
Schools for boys; but why wait until
the boys ere bed? Try the' "ounce of
prevention." Teach' them how te do
thlnge that are wortl while, from, the
boys' standpoint
A movement with this end In view
would meet with the hearty approval of
mothers, for who understand better than
they what a problem It le to bring an
active boy through the temptattona that
are on every hand and have him reach
the years of manhood a cltlsen to be
proud off - Employment for hand and
brain would ,savs ' many a boy from
ruin. ' - ...
Fathers are absorbed In business or
In the struggle to support the family,
thus leaving the training of the boy
largely In the hands of the mother. , A
mother with tact and a large amount of
common sense succeeds fairly well with
the boy until he reaches an age where
he realises, as doea tjie mother, that he
needa to know aoma things that the
mother eannot teach him. Here the
manual training aohool might be of
great assistance. ' . . . "--'.,'',
There are many positions open to
boye; but how much better' for the em
ployer as well as the boye if the latter
haa had training for the special line of
Work which he la to do,
' Nothing will give tk boy more con
fidence and self-respect than to know
that he le - fitted to do the work ex
pected of him. Possibly I manual
training school Is one of . Portland's
greatest needs. i :" L -'
Will It payt Tee, In every way If It
helps the boys te be better cltlsena.
I j 7 A MOTHER. ' ,
A Useless Sentry.
A sentry hss been stationed every day
for IS years in the corridors of theoourt
of cassation In Paris, and somebody haa
Just discovered that he has been useless
all that time.
Formerly a staircase led from the
Conclergerle prison to the corresponding
eorrldor In the old palace of Justice, and
a sentry was put there originally to
guard It, but the edifice waa burned In
1171, during the commune, and when the
courthouse was rebuilt the staircase wse
omitted. But the ssntlnel was kept In
Jthe corridor justths same, : ,
BIRDSEYE VIEWS
cf TIMELY. TOPICS
' SMALL CHAN03. -
'Tlsn't a Bull August a Portland. ''
' '' ' v a a r ' .- '.;'.'...
Never depend en a weather bureau.
. . .
How to get a vacation: Oat aa Office,
e a . i i. ..
Teddy will probably etay by Bristol
iuw. . - ...... . .... .
..' v, e. a - ' :
Hake a lot ot aood roads, after bar.
The automobllea a amoA thltiar
misused..',.
: ..- . - ' . . .e a ...: . :
Farhana Bryan will ma aaraln In 1 tl
eio. ': ..... v -.' ' '.. ....
-. i . . . a e . . ' !
How many acalne haa Han a mat t
this timet ' . , ,.::. . -
.-. .. -a- a ,; " .:'!.:
There nnlarfe. a feiiafe aa,' 4m vamv
beck yard If you get up early. . , , v
Clark for vice-president 1 well, we
hope not , He'd miss the dollar. :
,, '. e, e.- ... - .--.,.-'
- Take your rubber clothing lf you ao
hop-picking. Tou may need 'em.
- - , e e- :
Are all four of those normal schools
te be maintained T Two' are enough.
Maybe Hermann will settle In Ger
many and help the kaiser run Europe. .
And how Is Mae Wood getting alone?
We yearn to hear about that aweet maid.
, : .- '. e, ,e - -, ".
A whole lot of people are now wish.
Ing that they hadn't taken any vacation.
Really, next month la the best time
te tske a vaoMloa and - then . next
month. '. ! . ....... '-. ; -.
' e a . '. I.-'
Wouldn't It be fun to listen te a law-
and-tongue contest between Bryan, and
Roooeveltf -
s . - a e . : ' . .... -.
A young woman haa gone to Africa to
study tha ape-language. Couldn't aha
get Into sassletyT
Prescription: If - you eat "' e ackers"
eanned meet take atryehnlne after-1
warns to ee. aura. . .- .
If you haven't been Indloted. and naver
atola any land, don't become euddenly
affrighted by Heney and hla band. . u
Maybe the aheriff ahould be allowed
IS per week for feeding prisoners beafia.
We'd hate to see a good man loee money.
Looks like Mr. T. T. Gear ought to
have that collectorahlp. Who haa storied
mora for tha G. O. P., or' more eloquent
ly, than het ,
A Little Out
THINGS PRINTED TO READ .WHILE YOU ,WAtT.
v The Language of Umbrellas, ;
.. From Spare Moments. ; ' -
. There ie a language of umbrellas as
of flowers. : For .. instance place your
umbrella in a rack, and It will often
Indicate that It will ohange owners.
- To opetrtt quickly- In the atreet
means that somebody's eye . la going
to be la danger.
To Bhut It qulokly signifies that a
hat or two will probably be knocked
eff. - -.' - '
An umbrella- carried over a woman;
the man getting nothing but the drip
pings of the rain, elgnlf lea courtship.
When the man haa the umbrella and
the -woman the drippings, It Indicates
marriage. . 5 -. . .- ..
To ewlng your umbrella ever your
shoulder slgnlflee "I am making a nui
sance of myself." -. .
To put an alapaea umbrella by the
Bide of a silk one signifies "Exchange
la ne robbery."
To lend an umbrella Indicates 1 am
a fooL"' -
To return an" umbrella means well,
never 'mind what- It means; nobody
evor doee that . -
Who Should Write Our Stories?
It Is Life that aake "Who ehould
write our stories?" and then answers
the question after this fashion: -,
The love story Twain. '
The English etory London.
The tearful story Paine. '.,
The creditor's story Hope. ..
' The baby story Howells. -t
- The newly wed story Batcheller. . :
The young bud etory Flower.
The sarcastlo story Cutting.
What's the objection te adding:
The hopeful etory Ade. '
The tempersnce story Wells.
i The sleepy etory Chambers.-
The incendiary 'etory Burnett ' V
Tha traditional story Chaatnutt -.
The Blmple story Green.
-' .' A Screen From Human Skin.
The sultan of Turkey Is said to pos
sess a fire screen, 200 years eld, made
from the tanned aklna of II faithful
slaves who rescued a former sultan from
a biasing palaee at the cost of their
own. lives. , .; -,, .:.,"-',
, Earliest Strike Fund. .. V
. .-.
. The earliest mention of a atrlke fund
oeeurred In the walkout of the Paris
ian stocking weavere In 1714, when a
crown a day was subscribed tor every
; Spying by Airship.
i ' From the London Globe.
Is the - airship already beginning to
tend Itself to purposes of military
espionage? An Incident that seems to
point in this direction la reported from
Cognac. At ebout o'clock on Friday
evening a balloon passed over the town,
sailing low, and came to the ground
about . thrse quarters of a mile away, near
Combe-des-Damee. - It 'contained four
men who spoke German and admitted
that they were from Strasburg. On being
asked for their papere they showed only
a pencil note. Indicating that they were
engaged on an official mission. VAt the
gendsrmery they asked for the Swiss
consul, but they are believed by the
French police to be German officers.
Submarine Navigation.
The success which hss attended sub
marine navigation In the French navy
haa led the German navy to carry out
experiments with various acoustio appa
ratus destined to give warning ef the
approach of submersible boats. Thus
ths German admiralty has Just carried
out in the roadstead off Kiel official ex
periments Ith a new apparatus Invented
by a naval lieutenant, end these expert
mente have been most successful. With
1
' OREGON -SIDELIGHTS.
Dufur creamery nearly 'eeenpUted. . '
1 e e -. ... , '
.Great erope of apples and peara In
Curry county. -
.... . , -. ' e,e v.. ... ..- :
. The mall service of Wallowa county
"la a peach," declares the Loettng Dem
ocrat i ...,- ,-.'- . . -
! , '-. e e-' y- "'! , ; ""
Soma . fellow with nothing . useful te
do is going to organise a band ' la
Madras.-.'...' ' TV? :" ;'fY ', vC ,
' Enterprise ""city dads" have a' notion
of "taking the bull by the homs,'V and
prohibiting cowe running at large. .
.-' ;.,...- ,' ... . .. '.-
In the gray-gold of the morning.
When you awake, , n -.V J
' Then la the Mother Earth's adorning
, Her toilet she doth make.
'.' - ' a ,' e.. ' V - '
The Bend country ie destined to be a
great fruit country. Manr hundreds af
fruit treea, berry bushee and strawberry-
piants wsre planted laat spring, says
the Bulletin, . ,. 3
-. a e .
Milton" Eagle: ' The Eagle waa In er
ror Ust week In Stating that Mrs. It X.
Bean's baby had five teeth. The num
ber ahould hav been six. We were mis
Informed and cheerfully make the cor
rection. ,
f V . ...
Bend Bulletin: Much "complaint Is
beard this season regarding the damage
dona te crops by chipmunks. They are
vary numerous this year and In a ehort
time ean do great damage te the. potato
and grain fields.. Settlere report that
they are more numerous this season
than they have been for years. . ' . v
' ;, ., e. e ..:.f'1'
Madraa Pioneer: Crane Prairie, which
ilea along tha Deaehutea and la covered
with a fine growth Of -native grass that
ean be cut for hay. Is said -te be at
tracting the attention of the landaeeker.
elnee the recent act of congrees which
permlta entries upon agricultural lends
In forest reservea. Theae prelrte lands
are well watered and will produce a ton
or mora ot hay par acre, without any
cultivation whatever. - They lie eloae te
the mountains, and the hay, f lnde a
ready market , . ... - : ..-..- y-,-. ,: v..
. ..... e... .v ... .. ..
, MoMlnnvllle Telephone-Register Sat
urday as the freight stood at the depot
our attention, was caned to .two . flat
care . loaded with" timbers. ' Investiga
tion revealed the fact that the "sticks"
ware II Inohea square and to feet long
without a knot These timbers were
eawed at tha Willamette Lumber com
pany's mill at Falls elty. and were on
their way east These Umbers' contained
4,471 feet of lumber each, at lit per
thousand, the selling price, will bring
I1TS.7S. No wonder there are ao many
land grabbers lq .Oregon-, v 1
of tKe Common
striker and all blacklegs were merci
lessly boycotted, says the London
Chronlole. The blggeet strike under
the "ancient, regime" was that of the
silk faotory hands at Lyons In- 1744.
whan 11.000 men went out on a strike
and so alarmed the mayor that he con
ceded everything they asked. No more
Btrlkes were heard of untir 1710.
";! '''..''': DeflnitJona. ' - r ':';,'v.. ;
- Proas the London Tribune. ' -
Tailor's goose A bird with an ab
normally long bill. .
Philistine Generally, the man next
door.- ., . .-..- m
Gratitude One tenth of the interval
between two favors.
Temperament Aa apology for charac
ter. - -
Rising elocutionist Ths elooutlonlar
who,' never acquires the art of sitting
down, . .
- Race A run for your money. . X
Bookmaker The recipient of money
for your race. '
, Dyspeptic Philosophy. "
From the Philadelphia Ledger.
' Even the doctor len't la buslneee for
his health. , ' .. . ,
- Extremes meet.' but they don't al
ways speak aa thsy pass by. ,
Hero worship Is generally so grati
fying to the here that he lias to par
ticipate 4n it ' .
Any man eaa lie, but It requtree con
stant practice to do it successfully.
If It wasn't for the eynlo a fellow
would never know how happy - he
Isn't ' . "
- Courage.1. v".-;;.
Write on you doors ths saying wise and
rm old, .
"Be bold! be eoldr and everywhere
"Be bold: , , . ,
Be not too bold!" Tet better the excess
Than the defect! better the more than
lees; t..'.... --
Better like Heetor In the field to die.
Than like a perfumed Peris turn and
X' " 'fr'. ' ' Longfellow.
. ' . Judicial Opinion. ' f
j' "A Chicago 'woman aued a neighbor
Whose unmusxled -dog chewed up .one
of her children. , Justice Callahan, In
pronouncing Judgment said:
"Fox 1 terriers are snappy. I know
them. They ehould all ba thrown Into ,
the lake One poor little chlld'e Ufa la -worth
, all tha dogs In the world." -
, ., . a
a view te teetlng the new microphonic
apparatus a bell weighing 141 pounds,
and with Its clapper moved electrically,
waa aunk near tha Gabelfleoh lightship
to a depth of to fyt which la tha aver
age depth at whlcnaubmsrlneaare navi
gated. By meane of a -"microphone de
tector" it was possible to. fix with, cer
tainty up to a distance of three and
three quarter miles the actual poaltlon
of the bell, while He tonaa eould be
heard elearly up to a dlatanee et five
and five elghta miles. "
y
A Strange Disease.
An extraordinary case, entirely un
known in medical experience, haa' en
gaged the attention ef Budapeat sur
geons. - A railway conductor named
Ladlslaus Nagy, while at work waa eud
denly seised with violent cramps which
took a most peculiar form.. Nagy
turned . continuous somersaults which
nothing' seemed able te stop. The am
bulanee corps was sent. for, but could
not stop the contortions, and he was
taken to. the Roehue hospital. On the
way 'the pettent continued to turn
somersaults in the ambulance wagon
and kept It up for twe houre after reach
ing the hospital. Then be fell into un-.
eeneelousnssB from which' the doctors
had difficulty la restoring hla, -
V