'p -r ;-:-.EDIT01iVAL;piLGE ; OF . iHiS; JOURNAL
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Pm proof against that word ;
failure. IVt aeon benlnd it.' ?
' Tbt only failure, a man ought ..
to fear la cleaving to the pur--
poae rhe aeea to U beet t
George Eliot. . ' ' .
':. Q; '.: OWL CARS, ';.;';
mWO WEEKS AGO The Jour-
V.;." I ' nil transmitted to the Port-
land Railway, Light & Power
company the ',' petitions for an all
night ar service.. Beyond the verbal
statement by Vice-President Fuller
that th matter' would be taken under
consideration, the company has made
no resoonse. '' -.. ?; '- ' 1 : . -
I is indisoutable that the people of
Portland are practically unanimous
in the desire for "owl cars." in Seat
tle the cars run until 2 d'clock in the
morning and at 4 o'clock ears leave
the center of the city on all the prin
cipal .lines, the full service being re
sumed an hour or 'ao later.' In San
Francisco, up to the time of the earth
quake, n.nll-night service was main
tained, the cars running at intervals
of 40 minutes after 1 o'clock. Port-
. land people are making no unreason
able demand when they insist that
they shall have at least as good ser
vice as is enjoyed by other cities on
' the Pacific coast '
The local street ; railway officials
aeem disposed to treat the demand
: tor a late service with but scant con
' Sideration. 'Yet the public ia not in
the attitude of a suppliant -in this
matter':-Over and above the valuable
rights conferred upon the street rail
way company by its franchises, it en
joys privileges which are mere ease
ments, terminable at the will of the
people," or indeed at the instance of
any individual citizen. Under these
circumstances it does not become . the
company to assume an attitude of in
difference nor to disregard the wishes
of the public ..The relation between
the company and its patrons should
be marked at all times by the spirit of
' mutual concession and accommodation.--
- Vj
The Journal has advocated the in
stallation of a late ear service be
cause convinced that the convenience1
of the public demande it. The ex
"pressidn of the people wish is not a
: matter to be ignored fcy the street
railway company. v
-;; ViA-SEA RESTORED. ;: :; '-'i
EOPLE ' who 'remember - their
"; geography r- or-, are familiar
i K- with the topographical 1 fea
tures ; of southern . California will
' readily ; recall the region rariously
'known as the Salton Sinlci the Saltoo
-, V Basin, or the Salton Sea. To call it
' a "sea" has alwaya been and still will
Vbe technically incorrect; for though
filled again with water it is only a
, v I great inland lake. For , time out of
mindit has been a desert of stunted
'Sagebrush, cacti, and alkali, thickly
i , 'I overcrusted with sea salt; hence its
Dime; and salt works were estab
'. liihed by an oasis in that "death's
: tl valley '
I ' ' The- formation of this depressed,
, . barren and baked piece of ground has
' ' , alwty been of interest to geologists,
. -1 for it lies in its lower levels 263 feet
below the level of the Pacific ocean.
' ' To' the southward flows the great
; , Colorado fiver, emptying its luke
warm and alkali-impregnated waters
into the Gulf of California.
f Within a few years enterprising
' men have sought to irrigate a large
adjacent area by bringing water from
this river across the intervening low
f sand ridges upon an extensive plain
adjacent to this sink, and would have
done so successfully except for the
antic of that whimsy stream, which
they could not control. Five years
ago they cut a canal through the
sandhills, in a roundabout way, partly
through. Mexican territory, from the
Colorado river to thl "imperial val
ley," and two year ago dug another
canal. - - There wa a great area of
desert; there wa a great Volume- of
' water; it wa an irrigation . propo
sition; but the river wa false to
them, or not sufficiently understood,
aad apparently all their work will be
for naught, for the present at least
; The Colorado river ha at ordinary
time strong current and ft great
volume of water,; and when flood
come, as they do occasionally, it it. a
tremendous, terrible stream. In 1503
it formed a. new channel, and these
irrigating; . canals it msde use of to
flow through into Sslton Sink, .into
which the greater part of its water
are now flowing, and they cannot he
restrained or turned back. They
have, already covered an area of or
400 square miles, and are rising at the
rate of six inches a week.
- The present prospect is therefore
that perhaps for ages to come there
will be a inland sea or great lake in
southern. California, where for ages
past have been alkali dust, scorpions
and thorned cacti. Possibly the In
genuity and money of man. may turn
this water out some time,' but this
seem impossible, for a great part of
it is' absolutely below sea level " This
was one Irrigation'scheme that didn't
"pan out." -v " ' .: A , .
tf l.. .,,ii,. '.fc. .' mm., If j f V
: SAMUEL GOMPERS' VIEWS.
MANYti even among working
' men, will ; not sympathise
'very heartily with Mr. Sam
uel Gompers in his opposition to the
employment of. Chinese on the Pan
ama canal.' If there were not abund
ance of other work for all American
laborers; if the work could be done
by American labor; if the wages were
Sufficient tdtempt and hold American
labor-to do that big job in that nasty
climate, 'then the, sentiment against
the employment of Chinese there
would be much stronger; but under
the circumstances the course of the'
government in - employing Chinese
will find many defenders, ' 1
Turning to another : subject, ari
Mr. . Gompers' views thereon, every
intelligent honest citizen should be in
entire accord with him. In view of
the contest now in progress between
oriental labor and the leaders of the
Republican party, it is interesting to
know what Mr. Gompers thinks of
the v standpat slogan. . Speaking be
fore a committee "of '.. congress last
March Mr. Compere said; ' ' . 4 ; :
V ' . mm .m -
i ininx mat an through history
you can find that 'same appeal and
plea made by everyone, who profited
by the unjust conditions which ob
tained at that time. Those ; who
profit by injustice, those who profit
by mal-administrat!on, those who
profit by . unjust laws, r those who
profited by human . alavery . in all
cases -and in all - agee hare urgred
those In whose power it was to make
a change, to " 'maintain Jthe existing
conditions." It has been the repudia
tion of such claims that has made for
the progress of the world, and that
ha established een the republic of
our country. ; ; Every corrupt poli
tician, : every .overwhelming-; boss,
every greedy corporation, every dis
criminating . railroad, every trust,
every man who profits from a wrong
ful condition of affairs will urge the
advantage of maintaining existing
conditions." . : , ,
In this ' utterance Mr. 'Gompers
struck the nail on the head.
SAN FRANCISCO'S FRIENDS.
AMONG Jhe sweet uses. of ad
versity i the discovery! to
miviiu vi uicir iincere
friends. The terrible distress of San
Francisco has revealed to her aome-
thing that she did not know that she
stood among the first in the national
love, and that the national heart bled
in the knowledge of her misery, y
-That there ' has been some hvnoe
rlsy in the revealed sorrow and that
many of the tears shed over San
Francisco's ashes have been of the
crocodile .sort, there is no doubt . but
the people of the stricken city have
been able to tell the true from the
Pecksniffian regrets." It wa charged
that some of the cities of the north
coast-Hind, the towns named ' were
Portland, Tacoma and Seattle were
not so sorry as they- professed to be
st San - Francisco's plight, in which
they were represented to see an op
portunity to build themselves uo en
her lost business. : The Journal some
days sgo - denied : the,; aspersion on
Portland' sincerity, and denounced
the writer of the calumnies as a false
friend to San Francisco and. a libel
lous enemy of this city., and our re-
marxs nave appealed to the fairness
. ' a a . . .
of the San Francisco Chronicle, which
says: . '. .
"The Oregon Daily Journal assures
us that the people of the city in which
it is published have the kindliest feel
ings for San Francisco, and that we
make a mistake in supposing that any
sinister meaning can be attached to
the misrepresentations of the con
ditions existing: here. The Chronicli
has no reason whatever to doubt the
assertion of The Journal On the
contrary, it firmly believes that the
people of Portland have' too' much
acumen to take any stock in state
ments which the records and other
facts amply prove art untrue." i v
Henry Westerman, an incorrigible
adulterator of'mjlk, has been over
taken by the misfortune pf another
What Ia Portland's Greatest Need?
MEMBERS OF CITY COUNCIL TELL JOURNAL
WHAT WOULD IMPROVE ROSE CITY.
Hard Pavements: R, A. Preston;
R. Preaton of tha Mrat ward ba.
Viaraa In hard pavamaata. In order to
pay tna. paver hm would bond the prop
erty fronting on the a tract and allow
the owner to square the coeta on the
Installment plan. ' J.
."Ona idea, I have alwaya had abent
mo aireat queatlon la that we should
have a hard aurfaca pavament throuah-
out." said Mr. Preston, "I know of no
areattr need of tha city than this. I
believe ths property owners should be
compelled to put down some sort sf a
hard surface pavement soma fcavsment
designated hy the city. In Beams they
nave line streets because the owners
are compelled to surface them properly.
- "By hard surface pavement I mean
bituminous paramenia. The city should
aro ahead with tha work and five the
property owners a - ehane t pay by
bonding; their property, so that they will
nofbe compelled to pay tn a lump sum.
I. would pare the whole city, In that
way. We have a few blocks nrouerly
paved, but by the present method It Is
very slow work. - The only way it an
bs dons Hunt is to -provide for ths
bondlnar i of ths , property.' X always
hoped that some .'plan looking toward
this and would be brought up. I have
talked it over with other members of
the counoil and I am convinced ithat
How Wc Get Some
BY J. B.: HORNER.
The ' cosmopolitan : theory" of. the
brotherhood, pf map prevails In Europe.
Upon this -theory men are correct In the
belief that they have the right to live
where they eal) accomplish the most for
themaelvea "and . those dependent on
them. Accordingly vast numbers de
siring to improve their condition, seek
some Mecca, and,when they : consider
all the Inducements offered abroad and
listen to the- atory A of the Puritans,
the Huguenots and those who followed
them. tbey. Infer that America tn his
tory a well as tn name sounds much
like Mecca, and they naturally turn
their faces aoroaa 4he -Atlantic-Theso
people, therefore; like those who ' pre
ceded them, have rights" which temper
ate notions . must- accord to them, -So
whlla It Is possible to discuss but one
part of Europe 'in- a brief article, let
that part be a synecdoche the . part
for all to' Illustrate tha situation, y '
One hundred Immigrant chips run be
tween Italy and America. These ves
sels, therefore, form the great. Italian
bridge to osr country. ,W say Ital
lan'brtdge advisedly, because the bridge
Is principally owned and .operated by
the Italians.- Since there ere so many
Interests in common the Atlantic bridge
between ths two. nations should-be the
Italian-American bridge, meaning that !
me naijnns si me two enas- ox ens
bridge should possess and szerclse ths
right to ' determine wh shall cross
Over.'; .' t, S i. . ''..;; . . -t'.
. Statistics -show, that 115.900 Julians
oame . to .America last year.' Figures
also show that of the 70,000 conscripts
called, IrrtS Italian service during the
same 'time; ( per cent are - Illiterate,
which is to say that they can neither
read nor write. In some localities the
Illiterates reach. 70 per cent. Nor do
the . people themselves see the reason
why men who dig require an education,
since they are merely subjects la a land
where tha government idee the think
ing for them. It Is fair to Infer, there
fore, that half of the Italians who corns
to - America ' are Illiterate, hence re
quire much careful training to develop
them Into a people whoss vsry homes
are little . republics, so that erstwhile
subjects of a kingdom may naturally
and easily grow into intelligent,. -eelr
governing cltlxens of a great Ce public
It Is reasonable to say, therefore that
only the -better classes are dealrabie Im
migrantspeople who will, be self-sup
arrest So often has this pervert been
cnargea wun anuiing mi mux mit
grave suspicion attaches to retailers
who buy from him. On his next con
viction he should be sentenced to I
diet of his own concoction and un
doubtedly would be, if it were not for
the milk-and-watery constitutional in
hibition against cruet and unusual
punishment.' v - r , : '"'
r '1 . , , , '
" Sullivan somehow , that name
seems familiar may be able to rent
all the hotels in Peoria but ;wbat
does ' Peoria amount to, : anyway ?
There are bigger towns, and bigger
halls and Bryan has a world-wide
tongue. '? , . j,'.'
And while the Portland Railway
Light 8c Power company is putting its
wires underground, interference with
similar action on the part of the tele
phone r and telegraph corporations
would be regarded as an impertinence.
The Giant of J;he Coast league4are
home again with ..the' percentage of
winning games in their favor, and we
do not crowd hyperbole'when .we say
that Portland expects every man. on
the team to make a home run today.
' .,'.- : .'. . J '." y..
The best political joke of the day
has its delicious humor In the serious
statement that the MTeas He pub-.
Iicans.have had a split." Over wlist?
The right to be worke.dV5- 'fv
- - .
, Mr. Kipling's latest - poem, is a
study in geography dashed with a
flavor of the stockyards.y
That's right; put the wires under
groundas fast as possible. It must
be lone. '!-: -: ' ' 'v, .- -
Some Statistics.
If all. the money saved annually by
the women of ths United States at ths
one-day bargain sales wars to be di
vided eniong ths J7.7I7 turpentine farm
ers and laborers in 'the united States
eaeb would receive Jlil.ll, or 41 mere
READERS
1 1 . 1 . '. 'V
R. A. Preston.
something will bs dona. . I will see my
self that ths matter - will be brought
UO." . r. .
of tlie Immigrants
porting, -peepls who-eaa read and will
read and think for themselves, and
study our system so that they may be
valuable;-law-abiding cltlxans.
From afar off, one might suppose
that this stream of Immigration Is
carefully strained In the presence of
the buyer as well as the seller. . But tt
would Je,dlffIoult -.indeed to strain tha
Columbia: and evidence of the buyer's
presence at the Italian and of the bridge
.Is wanting.' But it. Is said the officers
of the ehlp look to this. It ts an open
Question whether- the , Italian captain
is longer really master of hie ship.. ' It
la" true that fee eigne ' papers - and - re
ceives - his commission, but that com
mission Is from a government that
seeks1 to rid itself of certain criminal
and Indigent classes. Also ths govern
ment appears to be close 'to the trans
portation companies that have, so It Is
said about 1.000 - agent - throughout
Italy receiving a bonus of II a head
on esch person thsy decoy out of the
country Furthermore aa an additional
Induoemer.t SO per cent discount, -and
even more at times, Is allowed by trans
portation lines to the nearest .seaport.
All this Is transacted In. the name of J
Business; nut wnere mere is any re
striction whateysr one on the ground Is
unable to observe. ..v;-4 - .,
" Whan we consider how long -It re
quires to make a Yankee of the Ameri
can, one la led to inquire, how long
will it . require to, make , Xsnkeee of
thess - untutored classes? . Hence -the
urgent necessity for care. . -,! -f
. James . A. Garfield understood the
situation fairly well, and Introduced a
bill In the house of representatives
calculated to correct soma undesirable
conditions of, immigration to America.
The salient points of the bill were
these? - . - 'iJ'',"i:
V l.t Health -on board oif ships. . v'
" t. - Prohibition of the transportation
pf criminals and paupers. y
I. Appointment of International -sf-flelsls
at the chief sesports. .' - -i
4. Good treatment of Immigrants. '
I. National . reoord . annually . pub
lished of every declaration and final
naturalisation., , - '..;
Although the bill tailed to become a
law, times are ripening for an asser
tion en the. part Of Americans' as to
what phass 1 of heredity will , be per
mitted to cross ths bridge for assimila
tion with the genius that emanated
from the Pilgrim and the Huguenot.
than ths value of the vote of Vermont
at $10 a vote, and there would be a
balance of. $71.11. .'which would be
enough to buy 'each of the tB$ camels
In'Western Australia a nose ring worth
I .cents. . v 'i''
' 4f all the stogl made. in Wheeling,
West - Virginia, Irt -April and May, ISO,
were rolled Into one stogie, it would be
17.141.10- ihchis'.i long, '. (.144 . inches
thick and' would- weigh 111,17 ounces,
troy weight?' A- man would have to have
a Jaw TSf feet from ear to ear. meas
ured through his mouth, to get It be
tween his teeth, and If he smoked it up
be would be so sick that It would re
quire the services of ' 121 physicians,
1,700 nurses and 141 attendants II
years 11 months . 11 days. It minutes
snd II seconds to get his stomach In
order again.' Ths araoke from ths stogie
Would form a cloud ItlK miles long by
4T 1-1 wide, obscuring the sun from
Msysvtlle to Monessen, Pennsylvania,
If ths cold feet of- the men ahead of
the game in all of the poker seances In
Chicago on an average night were to be
collected. It would glvs a frigidity equal
to that of ll.T15.400 pounds of artificial
Ice manufactured annually in flt,- Louis,
and If a percentage of thle Ice equal
to the duty on candles Into that part
of ths Oold coast of Africa west of ths
river Vol ta were to be; used in high
balls, It would cool I4.6H.140 of these
drinks,-which would furnish 10 such
drinks dally for - one year to each of
the 11,471 stovs, furnace ' and grate
makers In ths United States, leaving
I, 161.710 drinks to. spare, which would,
if sold at two for a quarter, provide a
sum sufficient to buy three pairs f
sock worth $1 a dosen" for each of the
II, 182 missionaries in the world. , ,
.: 1 1 ! ;
Circulation Reversed. ' ' , f
It Is claimed at the university of
Chicago that Professor - Guthrie and
Cavlel, after a long aeries of experi
ments with a dog, have succeeded tn
reversing ths circulation of tha blood
byvarious msthods and form of trans
posing the vein and arteries.
- It Is declared that the transplanting
of vslne upon arteries has produced,
from a functional point of view, ths
transformation of those veine into ar
teries, which at once adapt themselves
tosrterlal function and transmit the
blood Indefinitely. -. ' ,' 'v C ' '
gome medical men believe that In the
future this system of reversal will be
come so well perfected and-understood
that various diseases may be cured by
its means as, for example, in cases of
sof tsnlng ef ths brain, red blood - may
be sent surging through that organ, re
vivifying ths brain cells and restoring
the patient to a normal condition. , It
Is else hoped that reversal of the sjrc il
lation In a vnan may ba found to ours
gangrene, which ha been a serious ob
stacle U the healing of internal wounds.
A Little 'Nonsense
-'v. . The Peril of Speed. ' - . -
aayor MeClellan of New Tork. who
so narrowly ascaoed taking toe flym
path-London train that waa wrecked
last manth, waa dining In London at the
Carlton...:-..' .
. A mi re bar ef Arasrloan were In the
f tenable restaurant, and thsy all
took ooffee together in the foyer after
dlntas. seated at UtUe table on the low
white V balcony, near the orchestra,
which- affords so fins a visw of restaur-
taurant aad fovor both.
Ths talk turned to- high speed aad its
perils the perilous high speed of motor
cars., eapmss trains and the tiae.
Mayor MeClellan smiled and said! '
' "There Is, undoubtedly, always some
thing dangerous about - speed. When J
was a etedsnt at Princeton, there was
a - middle-aged oook, simple-minded
woman with a rood deal- of money
saved, whe suddenly got herself sngaged
to a horse jookey. -i'.
' T saw the cook standing looking out
ef her kit oh en window with a' dased
expression one morning, and I 'said to
her: . j. : -
. " 'What ts the matter. Hannah T " "
" "Why, sir,' aha said, "with my hus
band that Is to be. everything goes with
sucn lignum speed that It's eonrusin'.
Day before yesterday we got acquainted,
yesterday we was - engaged, and today
I find that he already owes me $11."
'- - So JVould We AE, -
- Connls Mack, ths noted baseball man,
waa talking isr"?hHdelphla about the
Importance of silence. . ' 1 ' .
"No ball pUyer," he said to the
group of, young men-around hlaa, e
eompllshoa . anything by being noisy.
If a decision goes against a player. If
the umptrs is unfair; let him keep quiet.
Let him refrain ' from oaths, -shouts,
accusations. Noise, in the midst of a
game, only damage the Ill-treated play
er's ease. . . , -..
"To tmpress on my men this doctrine
of silence. I orten tell . them about
marriMl -(-Annie - --.
v rthe wife in the middle of the night
was awakened by the loud snoring , of
her husband. , She endured the 'horrible
racket as long as she could. Then
pinching the man sharply, she said!
."Herbert, you'd make less noise if
you kept your mouth shut.'
"Herbert, sleepy and surly, muttered:
.- " "Bo would ; you. , ; .- . ;
;-;j''y CM Pride Indeed.
r dvis pride," said Lincoln Staff ens,'
the reform writer, "Is all vary well la
its way.-.- Humility; though, and dis
content usually . lead to better . thing
than pride and complacency, and when
ever I - hear any man boasting over
much - about his city's excel lenoe . X
think of the civic pride of an old resi
dent ef Peebles, v
. "To this old mai, who regarded Pee
bles as A finer town than Paris, a oopy
of Shakespeare's works waa onoe loaned.
The old man iread ' the- Immortal plays
for the first time. Hs enjoyed them
mightily aad. on being asked what he
thought of them, he, slapped his knee
and saw In a loud, enthnslastlo voice:
"They're finely They're glorious.
They, far surpass alj jny expectations.
Why, sir. '.there' aro - not 20 .men In
Peebles who could written .those
plays!'.?- - ;- - .
..C'wtiov
Sim Bra'all. ' the evangelist.' whom Xr.
Tonrey reoonverted, . was talking in .At
lanta ebon human 'nature. v
"Ifumart nature," ho .said, "ha a lot
of cussednsss In It. .' Men like to do bad
thing rather- than good' things. . They
even, take a-pride in being bad. "They
boast .'about t,he!r Wickedness. They
eem to be born that' way.
!'T once saw a handsome, bright little
chap of l of e sitting under an apple
tree reading a book.
. " There- a ' fine llttie - feHowM
thought, a clean-minded, manly little
chap. I'll see -what his ambition, la.'
"And X aproached the boy, ' patted
him on the head; and said; '
- !WslI.r njr t young . friead.: what - Is
your ambition T ' - ' .?. , ,
-Td llke,'.'aaid e- bOy: to have
people tremble like aspen leave at the
mere mention of my name.'"
...-.'.'v i'-:-. .
:'l Poet-fo'r VttH Eaters. J '.:
; James B. Reynolds, famous in the
packing-house exposures, said tf vege
tariantem in Washington t
"VegeUrlanlam ' is . ths more logical
as well as ths most comely and humane
dietary. Isn't It .v ':.,.-',
-"Vegetarianism -f- uperiority"- fom
the humane 'and the logical point of
view was once Indicated to me by a
child In Jew Tork. - , .
"While I was engaged In settlement
work In New Tork a little child In
one of the classes asked: '. -
- Why do we kill llona,.and, tigers f
Oh,' said X. that is because ths
bad lion and -tigers kill the ear HtUs
sheep '"0 1. . -.jcV,-; . ..... ,
" 'Why, then.' said ths - little ehlld.
don't w kill the butchers r '
v Judged; by His Otnbfwf':
j ,': From, the New TorkfliA'- '-s "
certain New Tork man whose bank
account Is so fat that it fakes sift fig
ures to messure It used to go around
looking reprehenslvely shabby. . One nay
hs went into J.'Pierpont Morgan's of
fice and asked to see Mr. Xing, who' looks
after some of the. oharity affairs jn
which Mr, Morgan is interested.
"Mr. King Js no in now," said one of
the clerks. "If you will coma in this
time , tomorrow you may be able 'to
eatoh him and possibly be will help you
a little." . - 4
. The habby-!ooktng man thought that
closing eentsnce sounded rather queer.
' "Thank you." he said,, "you are very
kind," :-' -' ";- -.-.,.. . - ' - . ,- -
.' "Oh, thara all right," replied the olerk,
compassionately? Tr been broke my
self and know, how tt goes.? .', .
The a)habby-Iooklng maa saw - light
then tn earnest. ' "Oh," he said, with a
dubious downward, glance, at' his own
clothes. Since then the 'shabby-looking
man has eessed to be Habby.
'if 9 ' 1 1 ' '
'', The Ohost of Memory.' ,
:t;- ..aoftnet' -''.,.'
X know not, what tt wa, a look, a'word,
. -Ths way you movsd your cool, allur
' ting hand-, . 'V ' '
Roused ' In me memories" of deserted
. lands .. -
And day forgotten, t wonder, had you
heard ,. , -
Anything of me, .that ; my heart waa
y , - 'Stirred
So strangely f - There lie one whe un-
pars tend - -.- t ' ..'. - I ,
And used o lovn: him the dreary
. eand (' ' - - - .
Of Styx and Lethe claim. ' ' Perhaps 'a
- bird '- . .
ant from Persephone' throne ha
eom to you . ,
And toucht you with the magle of Its
wings - - ''
That thus you waks In me Imaginings
Of days when 1 was valiant and true
And had not left the company of kings,
I X who am Slavs .to penitence and rue,
BIRDSEYE VIEWS
. cf TIMELY TOPICS
-: SMALL CIIANQ3.
..-.:. . -.- . .. , . . ;
Qoln' to the clreusT .
. ..: - , s . .; .:.-,-.:, "
Bast climate on earth In Oregon.
. . v " -j e : ' '.
Welt Teddy, really, are you a stand
patter?. .- -
. The . Portland oarsmen' made a big
record, anyway.' . . .. ,t , . -'
Hermann's trial may or may not od
our before he dlee of old age, ,
'.''',':'-.' '-, . e--.. '':..'' -i'
How would it- do for five . or ten to
olub togethsrand aead In a dollar t
. ''-' ,': , : e .- . -',' - ; '
Woader how Russell Sage and Jay
Gould are getting along together now. ..
'.''-. A e . , - .. . '
What fun for the Democrats It would
be, to he. sure If .Uncle, Joe could be
beaten., c '.'.-.'.; -
' v..''-, S'- e- - - '-':
- If he had td do It 1o4 $1.10 a' day the
President would not like pitching hay
SO well. ,i,
.. . : ,) S S - -rf .
Looks like Teddy : will . have to run
again. It la nearly time for him to re
fuse again. . . . ...''..
We hope, and doubt not, that our dear
Ringer Hermann la greatly enjoying his
European trip.-,, i --,- . -
Those Russian strikes seem te be a
good deal like a lot of Oregon railroads,
mostly on papsr, - 7 - ... ; i. ;
Bryan made a mistake by paying ao
muoh attention. to that fallow Sullivan
of Illinois, anyway, .y , , , , '. .
' -.-,. ; ,- .' j'
The Dingier tariff may bring hop up
to a profltabl - figure. Last .- year ft
sulked the darling tariff. v
-It 1 sometimes dlffloult to teU
whether the fellow whe lags along or
the on who butts In will best succeed.
You've certainly got a dollar; don't buy
grub with It: send It Immediately to
Sherman) he seeds It - He wants' to ge
on a vaoatiou.
It la suggested .that the torture "of
the warm plaos eonaists largely In ths
repetition of the question, "Is It hot
enough for youf ;-.
--r - , , r- . mm.: t .. ... . t .
A' fellow named Mlddlesky says he
wanta to fight JUn Jeffries. Probably
wants to be knocked Into the mlddlesky
ef next weeksky. ... . .-, ,,. .
Now If you see a buck' dser In your
back yard before sunrise, yeu can law
fully kiu him. Get up early, .and be
sure your . gun 1 loaaeo. -1-
- The - northwest is ' erring for-' men'
who will work. St. Paul News. ' No,
ths northwest is' too 'big to cry. The
women will save the orotis. .-
Shigene Guards? Tne Salem "journal
intimates that H., W.. Boott and T. B.
Wlloox may '. become candidates for
United State senator before the next
legislature, and no one would be sur
prised If this prediction 1 verified,"
A Little Out
THINGS PRINTED TO Mt
:. Pointed Paragraph, p.?
A kiss in time Is fine. '"5
' True friend seldom eom In bunches,
luif-made men don't alwaya make
themselves agreeable. . r. . , ... ,
Thera la no task too nam ror a lasy
msn not to attempt, . ' '
. Tmm Aionao. there are soms fair slng-
ere who are not blondea,' .
fluceess la often a hundred-to-one shot
that the talent overlooks. . .
A man nsvsr realties the goodnes of
his neighbors until he is sick. ,
Don't expect to tower above your
neighbors by standing on your dignity.
About the only way rou can erouae a
mean man's conscience Is te eatoh him
at It V ..' - ;
A. rule that refuses to work at all
of ton gets ths best of one that works
both wsys.- ... ',' ,' ' '
Some airls who think thsy can sing
ought to - patronise '- a - correspondence
school of thought. . ' :i . , t ., ,
; Inventioti for Horse. : ' ' .
A poor man went about In Nebraska
looking for work. ' He obtained a lob tn
a villa gs sawing wood. Ths sawysr in
terested hla employer, ana rmally con
fessed the reason of his ;povertj. He
was an inventor and had spent hi sub
stance -on a device te keep horse off
barbed wire fenoes. The idea seemed
promising to the Nebraskan, and hs fin
ally palad $1,000 for the right to sell the
devloe in hie state . Tha sample wa cent
later. . It waa a signboard to be hung on
ths fenoe, and read aa follows:
J V''"NOTicB TO HORSES.'" I f
1 .-...' Dengarous Keep Away.''V" : '
With the signboard came a pair of
spectacle , for the use of near-sighted
horses! -. . . ' - .' , -.
' Bridge In Indla.':'.;vl
Ths Indus In India Is orosssd in seme
of Its remote reaches by rope brldgea
The Ingenuity of the natives In making
these bridges ' with no material - but
twisted twigs, yst strong enough to hold
the weight or any number of- coolies
With their loads, and long enough to be
swung from ollff to .cliff scrose the
great river, 1 a source of wonder. Such
bridges s re composed of three strands of
twigs, ons for each, hand to grasp, on
to guide the fset They sag gracefully
from the tops of ths mighty ollffs that
flank ths rlvsr, occasionally swaying
slightly In ths wind, but are ss firm and
safe a a bridge of Iron or atone.
I?
, Making' VIrtue.Ridlculoua. ;
Anthony Comstock- has dons good
work In keeping down ' real offenses
against decency, but he Is constantly
bringing his society Into disrepute by
such absurdities a the senselss raid on
the Art Students' leagus of Nsw Tork.
A logical extension of this sort Of busi
ness would be the raiding of hospital
and medical school and the seisure of
work on physiology and anatomy,
whoss Illustration are Just a propsrty
"obscene" end "lewd" as are those of
the league's catalogue. The old lsdy In
the familiar story objected to the dress.
ne-room ef ths ban grounds being lo
cated directly beneath her window, be
cause she coujd sea the player robing
and disrobing. When ths dressing-room
was 1 removed te , the far and,' of the
- .. ,
nn
oreoon siDzucirra.' v v.
' , -. - " 111 ' -- - '
' St, Helena may save a furniture
factory. h- ,,. .' ,-'- V . -., ( - . .,
O.' . .. " e ,, . , . "
Kent Is no longer water dry; has' a
100-foot WSll., , t J : '
White eedar brings tl per thousand -'
la Myrtle Point. .... " - v : A , - r '
:.e.- ..-V "t. '4- ,. :t
Heppner Is grouchy; too many baohe- '"'
torsr -says ' the Gaaette.. . i.- .. . ...
' . . . e --1''.
-Wheat running from 46 to 61 bushel '
an aore around Adam. ; , ; '
".i..'. .V'';'-'.--'.- -: e- .,' '.-.' : ,
A Jordanman had l.EOO bushels
grain than "he expected. - :
v . e ev . ,'," ;
' Jackson eounty I getting - many
stretches of good rwads.
-. . -' .s e .'-.s-:
Many strangers In Rainier, moat , of
thera looking for locations. v -- -. -;
,'...' . ": S . s
On aooourit of two new rallroaSs out
of Ontario, (that town a booming. .
-; it''-' : ..' e - e .- ' ... . m wi.; '
Several farm near Athena average
6) bushels of wheat ah aore, one (5.
- ' ''-;?--''.'""' e e .. - A
: Dry as Newberg is some men. there j
get "under, the Influence "occasionally. . '
': " '' - - '"' -:. ', "
Dayton bualnese men are not la the.'
least discouraged by the -recent fire
there.' ' -.; -y-l . .-.,-
. - ;e,;e .',"-,..-.- .-5
"; A North Powder woman aged 60 years -gave
birth to her thirteenth child last 1
ufeek. r- -v"'- "
- , V..'j ... .;' ' .... - -,,-
.. 1 Miiflh nmmr Wat4 IS Wm' IAA
acres-ef apple orchard.' The owner will
gst rich, of oourse. - - ' . ';
:' - - .v.' -;,-s . e V '-''-." J '
The Independence Enterprise tells bf -:
Isdies In the harvest fields around there.
They are else women, -of eourse."
.-- ;,r t, :.. . . . e ..- s ''.'--"
, The liextngton Wheatfleld offers , a .
year's subscription to the bne bringing
In tha largest sack of potatoes. That .
editor won't etarve. , .. j , .-
. A ' Pendleton man whu had spent at
night la Jail went around with the mar
shal next day to all the saloon aad '.
had himself blacklisted. : ' -,.
Gold Beach Globe: If you wast to
ees good looking - and assart - school
teacher eom to town,' but don't be
watching the men all the time.
':'. -e - e .-. , ' ': '.
A Benton eounty woman returned" .
from Independence dead drunk. . Xnde-io
pen dance ought to be proud of that kind,, -
of prosperity, aaya the Albany Demo'
erat. . ,. -.. ,; - . .y, '..?"
Wearing hie ordinary reading glasses
and using an ordinary steel pan, Fsther .
Hoberg of McMlnnvtlle,- nearly 10 years " .
old, has written 1.101 words on' a card
the alas jnf a. postal card. -.The card eon
tains . ths Lord prayer, tha apostle's
creed, ten commandments and various
psalms and passages .of Sortptur ar
ranged in circle tha slse pf a dollar '
down v to -the - smallest . ooln- andtn the ,
squares and angles between. ,..;. ;":;'' ' )
T
of , tte. Common:
AD WHILE YOU milV
' When Many 'Marrltd., '
Ton can always tell whether a man 1
married or single whe you see him go
through a screen door, say the Wel
lington (Kan.) .News. If he ie married
he approaches the . door . cautiously,
glance nervously around, then takes erf
his hat and swipes It up aad down the
door two or three times. Hs then quiet
ly open ths - door about two Inches,
squeeaes himself through and elosee It
with a quick snap. The length ef time
he haa been married may be determined
by the degree of fear and nervousness
indicated In hla countenance. , .y . .rj
Real SoliUry' Confinement V-v; '
' There was a little touoh worthy et
Victor- Hugo la the bald . story of hi
captivity told In London the other day
by a Russian - -"political,' Nlkallaff Pe
trovlch Stersdvosky, who was rsleased
lately at 49 after II years' In SS. Peter
and Paul and the Bchlueeselberg.-.
The endlsnee got Its fullest sense ef
what solitary confinement meant' when
he told of watching tha keeper carefully
craping out ' the - marks of hi shoes
when ha had taken hla dally exerolse.
Not so much a a footprint la the sand
should 'ba left, to give comfort to the
next dead out".,':' '; $'-. ' j ;
'f . A Bit of Fiction.
If all the villains killed by all tha In
diana novelists In 106 had been killed In
reality, the death rajs of Indiana would
have been Inoreased 1.14 a thousand of
population, and tha cemetery association
at Lafayetts-would be forced 'either to
erect a crematory at a eost of $2,944.11. ,
or purchase two acree and three square -rods
additional. . . i . : ': . .. " 1
;; '' Highly Disgraceful, :V ''
Says the London Times' of Mart llOlt
"A decently dressed women was last
night brought out Into SmlthfJeld for
sals, but the brutal conduct of the bid
ders Indueed the man who was,, or pre-1
tended to be, her husband, to- refuse t? .
sell her; en which a sosns or riot and
confusion highly disgraceful -to our po
lloe took, place."'-. -., , .'. i,;,-.
Sleep.
"God bless ths man who first Invented
- sleep!" . . .. ' ;'(-. - . ; .
So Sancho Psnso said, and so eay 'I!';
And bless him, also, that he didn't keep
- His great discovery to himself, nor try
To make it as the luckjr fellow might
A closs monopoly by pltent right. , ' ; ';
- '.. -. ' ' -"-J.-'G. Ssxe,"..
ground she wrote Vh managers; thank. .
Ing them for their1 effort 4o .' remedy. -matter,
but saying that ltwa quite '
useless, a aha could still see the play- '
ere with tier 'Opera glasses. Anthony
Comstock j will not gain any sympathy
either for hie ..cause or hlffiself by
placing himself In the old-woman etas.
t . , 11 1 . ,
:. A Rich Negro. , ,
Philip A,' Peyton Jr a ftew Tork ne
gro, who msde $1,000,000 In Harlem real
estate, ha started the Negro Fifth ave
nue, neer One Hundred and Thirtieth
street. He hss . organised the Afro- ' '
Amerlcen Realty company, which now '"
owns SO apartment house. The whites
are movlna- out ranMlv mii ih.
section win soon be Decupled by wsll-te-
St
-v
(J
-: - '4' . ' .-.''':vr'..'..:i.'
i
V