.60
THE MORNING
ASTORIAN
EstaMlshid 1573,! K
Published Daily tfept Monday by
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WMKLY ASTORIAN.
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Entered as second-ciass mauer jui,
'30, 1906, at the postoffice at Astoria,
Oregon, unaer
Marchi, 1879. . -
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tr place of business may be made by
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mediately reported to the office of
publication.
Official paper of Clatsop County
and the City of Astoria.
TELEPHONE MAIN 661.
SOANDINAVIAN-AMEBIOAN
SAV. BANK
Courteous and Accommodating
Liberal Methods . Conservative Management
THE WEATHER
Western Oregon and Washington
Rain.
Eastern Oregon, Eastern Washing
ton, Idaho Showers.
DOING THINGS RIGHTLY.
When a civic institution, such as a
town, city, county, state or nation,
conceives the idea of doing some
piece of work that shall be an inno
vation and 'an improvement, and is
meant to typify, a perpetual purpose
and . become a fixed attribute of the
public service, the first rule of common-sense
would inspire the right do
ing of it, the use of the best materials,
the employment of the best skill, upon
the most wholesome plans framed to
meet the larger expansion of the
work with the normal increase of
population and the steady demand for
its extended application and opera
tion. In other words, wisdom dic
tates the building for the future and
not merely for the present
By way of illustration: An English
paper just at hand, contains the fol
lowing: "To provide for vessels of the
Lusitania class the Liverpool Dock
Board will, construct a floating land-
ing-stage nearly 2000 feet long, to lie
iq 40 feet of water, while a dredger is
to lift 10,100 tons of sand from the
bar in a single hour."
This is the scale upon which prac
tical people construct such commer
cial attributes; and there is a lesson
in it for Americans who are far too
easily satisfied with the meagre meet
ing of the demands of the hour. We
are inclined to cheapen our greater
expedients in such lines as this and
render them abortive after a brief
season of use because of the expand
ed demand that cannot be met shorter
of reconstruction upon the huge
scale. This is a costly policy, both
in time and money and the depriva
tion incident upon the waiting for
the new instrument of service. Take
our deeo-sea dredgers, for instance.
There is not one of them that
amounts to "shucks" as an endurable,
adequate and lasting proposition;
they are of restricted capacity, illy
contrived, poorly builded, short "of
power, with every limitation that
should have been guarded against;
and the people are up against the
eternal proposition of building all
over again at vastly increased cost
those things that should have been
carefuly and permanently constructed
in the first place.
Years ago, when William Reed was
secretary of the Portland Board of
Trade he pleaded for such dredgers,
but he was laughed to scorn, and the
Columbia river service was equipped
with the two "bum" specimens now
supposed to do compensating work
on that great artery of commerce; one
of them rotting at her moorings with
her boilers, less than five years old,
utterly useless from a dozen material
'defects; the other, doing a limited
service, of questionable value, and
vaeuest possible results. Yet hun
dreds of thousands of dollars have
been scent to put these discreditable
things in commission, and upon which
thev have not earned the paltriest
percentage of profitable increment
since the days of their launching.
"TURN ABOUT IS FAIR PLAY."
The people of Astoria have been
cenerous to the Astoria Electric Co
in the matter of franchises, privileges
and opportunities for the realization
of those profits the company was en
titled to in the course of its own ad
ministration, and advancement gener
ally, and there are those, in ample
numbers, and of influence, who think
it about time the company was do
ing something tangible for the city,
by way of extending its lines west
to Smith's Point, east to Alderbrook
and south over the hills, and opening
uo territory that needs just some
such impetus to become valuable and
interesting as home centers and busi
ness sites: as well as contributing its
direct service to the hundreds already
located on these outlying sections
and eager for the utility such exten
sion would afford.
The company cannot plead that
there is no business in sight; else its
original policy in seeking and using
the franchise was but an unknown ven
ture. It has built its own business,
and a good one, by drawing people
and homes along every foot of its
lines east and west, and the proposed
extensions would serve the same pur
pose, only in a larger degree, since
there is a far wider area to build into,
on the three lines suggested and
more engaging sites than the original
district offered.
The demand for this increase of
urban service is not extraordinary nor
irrational; many citizens feel that it
would be as profitable for the com
pany as for those whom it would
serve, on the ground that every home
established on its route stands for a
perpetual patron of its service, and J
the service would urge the steady in
crease of the homes. "Turn about is
fair play," and the, Astorians would
be glad to see these three lines start
ed in the interest of local develop
ment and general advantage, believ
ing the increment would fall as hand
somely to the enterprising company
as to the anxious citizens with homes
to build and already builded.
BETWEEN TWO THIEVES.
San Francisco has been crucified
between two thieves, and in the very
midst of her own bitter realizations
she sees the two scoundrels parolled
and taken down from their crosses,
for the moment, while she herself re
mains suspended in the agony and
shame of her fearful sacrifice. Schmitz
and Ruef are rejoicing in the techni
cal reprieve that has come to them
and are certainly going to make the
most of it in preparing for the
longer and harsher campaign of
prosecution that will surely be in
augurated against them on the unused
indictments at hand.
The eventual success of these men,
technical though it be, will be a direct
insult to the civilization of the day;
and there is surely wit, wisdom and
wealth in the Pacific metropolis to
carrv the task of reprisal to com
pletely successful issue. Else, we, of
America, had better voluntarily yield
our ambition to typify the best of
modernity in governmental and social
science and take our place in the
ranks of the boorish and helpless pro
letariats of Europe. If San Fran
cisco and California, knowing what
they know, fail to pursue these men
and their vile colleagues to the utter
lines of all that is due them, that city
and state will be amenable to reproach
and confusion for all time to come.
Before the People
Cards of Candidates In the Coming
Campaign.
IGN LANGUAGE
A FINE S
Droll Incident In the Reign of
James I. of England. ;
-r, .'I
A TRICK ON AN AMBASSADOR
I ' K.i
For Diseases of the Skin.
Nearly all diseases of the skin such
as eczema, tetter, salt rheum and bar
bers' itch, are characterized by an in
tense itching and smarting, which
often makes life a burden and dis
turbs sleeo and rest Quick relief
may be had by applying Chamber
lain's Salve. It allays the itching and
almost instantly. Many
cases have been cured by its use. For
sale by Frank Hart and leading drug
g sts.
Early Tendencies.
"Do you believe boys often turn out
as their youth promised?"
"Well, theyvdo sometimes. There's
Carver. He was the village cut-up
when he was a boy. and now ne s tne
leading surgeon In a hospltal."-C'hl-
tago News.
For Congress,
T. T. GEER
Candidate for Republican Congres
sional Nomination in the Second Dis
trict. Liberal Appropriations for
Waterways, Equal Opportunities and
Privileges for Labor and Capital, and
Governmental Control of Corpora
tions. To The People.
In submitting my name to the elec
tors of the Fifth Judicial District for
their consideration for the office of
District Attorney of said District. I
desire to say that if I am nominated
and elected, I will, during my term
of office, honestly, vigorously and
impartialy perform all the official
duties pertaining to said office, with
out fear or favor, endeavoring always
to accord to every individual, irre
spective of party, politics or person
alities, a sauare deal under the law,
keeping always uppermost in my mind
the interests of the tax payers of said
District and State.
E. B. TONGUE.
A BIT TOO SHREWD.
It Is not only In politics, but In other
things, that many men think they are
too smart to be honest-St Paul Dls
patch. -,
COFFEE
You can buy something
called "coffee" at 10c lb
with 3000 miles of R R
freight from the roaster ;
don't ;
Year fnett returni row BflMT U ton Coat
Ik Schilling'! Bait; m m htm.
One Venture In Which the Captain
Overreached Himself.
One of Uncle Sam's customs officials,
noted for his success In unmasking
smugglers, said the other day In a dis
cussion of a customs officer's duties:
"One must be shrewd, but not too
shrewd; otherwise , one overreach
oneself, like Captain Harrow of isle
borough.
"Captain Harrow of lalcaborougfc
was trading at Key West In a small
vessel. Business took him up the coast
to Tampa bay, and be bought, twenty
dosen chickens from a farmer at $4 a
dozen.
'The chickens were all sixes soma a
few days old snd no trigger than ca
nary birds; some fat and large, like
turkey gobblers. The captain expect
ed to make a lot of money out of
them. lie was very shrewd at a trade
"Well, at Key West a hotel man
eame aboard and looked the chickens
over.
" They are fine birds,' he said, 'now
much?'
"If you pick them out yourself.'
said Captalu Uarrow shrewdly, Til
have to charge you $0 a dosen. If 1
pick them out, I can let you have them
for $3.'
" 'AH right You pick them out,' said
the hotel man.
"Captain Harrow picked out a dosen
chickens of the canary bird size.
"'Here you are, twelve prime broil
ers,' he said, with a leer.
"Go ahead,' said the hotel man calm
ly; 'another dozen.'
The next dozen was of necessity
larger.
" 'Go on,' said the hotel man. 'Keep
on picking them out'
"And the third dozen was larger still.
The captain looked at bis patron anx
iously. , '"Keep right on.' ,
. "The next dozen was fine and plump,
and the next comprised the biggest
and fattest of the chickens.
"Keep right on picking them out
captain.', , ,
"Then at last Captain Harrow saw
how be had overreached himself. The
hotel man bought bis whole lot of
chickens at $3, and thus the captain
lost on the speculation 20 In cash, to
say nothing of feed and labor."-Cin-
dnnatl Enquirer.
' LOVELY WOMAN.
Ihe tot Into a street ear on
A freezing winter day.
She left the front door open oh,
What did the people say?
She bravely took a hammer, and
She tried to drive a nail.
The catastrophe that followed
Made every one turn pale
" Lovely woman!
She started to a party Just
A half an hour late.
At the door ehe asked her husband,
"Have I got my hat on stralghtr
They got her In the courtroom, and
They asked her, "What's your agef'
Says ehe. "I'll own to twenty-flve."
Now that was pretty sage.
Lovely woman!
She bought an automobile veilf
A hundred Inches long.
She'll have an automobile when
lltvy rw limine
. She worked and read and talked aU flay,
As every woman ought.
At midnight, when her husband came,
She told him what she thought
. . , Lovely woman!
, She's not at all athletic, a , , . ,
You've often heard her say,
But she'd Jump on the piano If
, A mouse should come her way.
Can she keep the men a-hustling? You
Can simply bet your lite!
Still we wouldn't do without her
As sister, sweetheart, wife. ,
Lovely woman!
Bomerville Journal.
Tht Different Interpretations of the
' Same Aets Performed by a Croshety
Spaniard and a Hard Headed and
Canny Old Sootoh Butoher,
It Is said that King James I. on re
moving to London was waited upon by
the Spanish ambassador, man of eru
dition, but, who bad a crotchet In his
head Dint every country should have a
professor of signs to teach him snd the
like of blm to understand one another.
1 The ambasdnr was lamenting ono
day before the king this great desider
atum throughout all Europe, when the
king said to blm: "why, I have a pro
fessor of signs lu the northernmost col
lege In m$ dominions via, at Aber-deen-but
it Is a great way off, perhaps
600 miles."
, ."Were It 10,000 leagues 'off I Shall
see him," said the ambassador, "and
am determined, to set out, In two or
three days." The king saw he had com
mitted himself and wrote, or caused to
be written, to the University of Aber
deen, stating the case and desiring the
professors to put blm off some way or
make this best of him. The srobasaa
dor arrived, was received with great
solemnity, but soon began to Inquire
which of them had the honor to be pro
fessor of signs.
Being told that the professor was
absent in the highlands and would re
turn nobody knew when, the ambas
sador said, "I will wait his return,
though It were twelve months,''
8eclng tbnt this would not do and
that they had to entertain him at a
great expense all the while, they con
trived a stratagem, , There was one
Geordy. a butcher, blind of an eye, a
droll fellow, with much wit and rogu
ery about him. lie was got, instruct
ed to be professor of signs, but not to
speak on pain of death. Geordy cheer
fully undertook the role. The ambas
sador was told that the professor of
signs would be at home next day, st
which he rejoiced greatly.
Next day Geordy waa gowned, wig-
red and placed in a chair of state In
a room In the college, all the profess
ors and the ambassador being In an
adjoining room. Tne ambassador was
shown Into Geordys room and left to
converse with him as well as be could,
the professors awaiting the Issue with
fear and trembling. .......
Tne ambassador bead op one of his
flngen to Geordy; Geordy held np two
of bis. The ambassador held op three;
Geordy clinched his fist and looked
stem. Tne ambassador then took an
orange from his pocket and held It up;
Geordy took a piece of barley coke
from his pocket snd held that up.
After which the ambassador bowed to
him and retired to the other professor.
who anxiously Inquired his opinion
of their brother.
"ne Is a perfect miracle," said tbo
ambassador. "I would not give blm
for the wealth of the Indies."
"Well." snld the professors, "to de
scend to particulars."
"Why," said tho ambassador, "I flntt
held up one mixer, denoting that then;
Is one God; be held up two, signify!)) c
that these ore the Father and Son. I
held up three, meaning the Father, tho
Son and Holy Ghost; bo clinched bin
fist, to say that these three are one.
I then took out an ornnge. signifying
the goodness of God, who gives his crea
tures not only the necessaries, but tuo
luxuries, of life, upon which the won
derful man presented a piece, of brend,
showing thut it was the staff of lire
and preferable to every luxury." .
The professors were gind that mat
ters had turned out so well; so, having
got quit of the ambassador, they next
got Geordy to hear his version of the
signs.
"Well. Geordy, how have yon come
on and what do you think of yon
man?"
"The rascal !" says Geordy. "What
did he do first, think ye? He held up
one miner, as much as to say, Tou
have only one eye. Then I held up two,
meaning that my one eye was perhaps
as good m both bis. Then the fellow
held up three of his fingers, to say that
there were bat three eyes between us.
and then I wns so mad at the scoun
drel that I stroked my nelve and was
to come a wbnek on the side of his
bead and would, ha' done it, too, but
for your sake. Then tho rascal did
not stop with bis provocation here, but
forsooth, takes out an orange, as much
ns to say, Your poor, boggarly, cold
country cannot produce that ,1 show
ed him a whang of a bear bannock,
meaning that I did un' care a farthing
for him nor hl trash neither as langs
I ha' this. But, by a' that's guid," con
cluded Geordy, "I'm angry yet that I
didn't thrash the hide o' the scoun
drel !"-London T. P.'s Weekly.
Fisher Brothers Company
OLI AOBNT1 ' '1K .''.!
Barbour and Plnlaysoit Salmoii Twins and Netting
Social Dance.
Oliver Chilled JP loughs
. llaltholdRooflnf-'vf'J
Sharpies Cream Separator!
Raecolith Flooring
Storrett'i Tools
Hardware, Groceries, Ship
Tan Bark, Blue Stone, Muriatic Acid, Welch Coal, Tar,
Ash Oars, Oak Lumber, Pipe and Fittings, Brass i f
Goods, Paints, Oils and Glass j f I
Flshtrmea'a Pure Manilla Rope, Cotton Twin and lain Wsb
We Wont Your Trod
FISHER BROS.
, v.i . ) J..M 'BOND STREET ,
BOOKS
"Uther and Igraine," "The Leopard's
Spots," The Chief Legatee, 71 V
"The Filigree Ball," "The Choii Invisible,"
TThe Battle Ground," "Lena Rivers,"
"Graham of Clayerhouse" ffJ7
O. W. WHITMAN
SUCCESSOR TO E. A. HIGGINS CO
BOOKS
MUSIC
STATIONERY'
STEEL & EWART
( ,;! iff - V i ) '
I 1.. , .-. T- a m Hi
Electrical
Contractors
;'!-fl.v :! ! I -
l ( 'I V''-"'')l''i f .- '(
CALL AND GET OUR PRICES
426 Bond 'St. ' Phone M3881
A social dance will be given Satur
day, March 14th, at The Uppertown
National Hall, Franklin avenue, be
tween 28th and 29th streets. Music
bv the Pacific orchestra. All cordial
lv invited. . 3-12-3t.
,
Millinery.
Mrs. R. Jngleton has Just opened a
nice line of ladies' Eastern bonnets,
and Saturday night will give a sale
bearinnintr at 8 o'clock. Mrs. P.
Ingleton, Welch block, opp. Budget
office. . ,
John Fox, Prei. , , F. L. Bishop, See. Astoria Savings Bank, Trtas.
' " Nslson Troyer, Vice-Pres. and Supt . n J , r .i
ASTORIA IRON WORKS
t. ,.v.- i DESIGNERS AND MANUFACTURERS u a
..... -i. OP THE LATEST IMPROVED . . . ? ;
Canning Machinery, Marine Engines and Boilers
COMPLETE CANNERY OUTFITS FURNISHED.
Correspondence Solicited. Foot of Fourth Strttt
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