JTIIB MORNING ilSTOlUAN. ASTOHIA, OitEGON.
SUNDAY, FEBRUARY 9, 1908.
h
if
if-
V
i
i i
' ; 'I
Jhe Old Folks
Matrimonial Exchange.
(Original.)
An elderly lady with a pair of short
gray curia oo each temple stepped into
the private office of rhllander Shanks,
merchant Mr. Shanks rose, bowed,
pointed to a seat and asked her what
he could do for her.
"I have come to see yon, Mr. Shanks,
mi very peculiar mission. I bare a
plan which I must preface by a bit of
explanation."
The lady paused and looked as If she
was hunting for some place to begin,
then went on:
"There are two parte to life for those
who live to be our age. The first
half Is entirely unlike the second. In
youth we know nothing of the loneli
ness of old age. Many a man and
woman up to forty Is absorbed in that
which has nothing to do with provid
ing companionship for old age. Then
perhaps suddenly a realization comes
to us of the fact that we need the
home. We remember the lost oppor
tunities of youth to form a connection
which would have resulted In sons and
daughters trowing up about us and'
"Madam," interrupted Mr. Shanks,
"you are describing me. I have built
ap a fortune, but have neglected to
build ap a home. I have reached the
time when I would gladly give the
fortune for the home. What Is there
for me when I leave this office? A
miserable existence tUl the next morn
ing, when I resume my duties. I dine,
alone, spend a lonely evening at my
dub, and when I go to my desolate
apartments"
"And I," interrupted the lady-"l
Mvt In a room by myself. I manage to
get along during the day, since I am
Interested in several charitable associ
ationspresident of one and secretary
f another-but when evening comes
how can I go out alone and where can
i gor
"Does your plan aim to relieve soch
conditions, madam?"1
"It does. Too have made it very
easy for me to propose it I knew you
were a bachelor and past well, past
Ifty."
"Fifty-five, madam."
Therefore I knew you would sympa
thize with me. I propose to establish
an exchange for those elderly people
who would like to marry, but have no
eoe to marry. True, the major part of
the deficiency we can never make up
the children. Dear little things, how 1
would love to have them always about
me, with their funny ways, their"
"And grown, madam. I would give
my check for a million for a son to
succeed me in this business."
, "And If I had had children when I
was from twenty to thirty I should
ow be petting my grandchildren. I
love them best from eighteen months
to four years, from the time they are
learning to walk and to talk Oil they
begin to crave playmates."
"And think what a fine thing it is to
watch them while they are being edu
cated the boys growing strong and
manly, the girls good and beautiful."
, "But we are wasting time without
coming to the point. I will enter my
name as the first woman charter mem
ber of the exchange. I would like you
to enter yours as the first man mem
ber." "Gladly, madam." regretfully. "We
cannot, as you say, surround ourselves
with families. We are too old. But we
nay make homes for each other. No
nan can make a borne without a wo
man. ' "You will need some funds, madam,
irst for stationery for your notices and
Invitations, then to secure a place for
meeting. I trust you will permit me
to furnish a little fund for a starter."
lie took a check book from a drawer.
"What name, madam?"
"Spinney D. A. Spinney."
"What a coincidence!" remarked Mr.
Shanks, oauslne in bjs work, . laylns
down his pen and looking at tub rauj
through his spectacles. "Do yoa know,
nindain, had it not been for one of
those asinine conditions Incident to
youth I might have had a home with
a lovely girl by the name of Spinney."
"We all have those memories. I one
day parted In a pet with a man"
"An ass prolmbly you mean."
"lie took me to a ball. I noticed the
name of a girl on his card of dance
engagements who I thought was try
ing to get him away from me. I told
him that he must either strike off that
name or strike off mine for the five
dances I had agreed to give him."
"Stranger mused Mr. Shanks. "Do
you know that that very same thing
happened to me? A girl made the
same requ.lrei.ueut, aud I drew my pen
cil through her own uame wherever It
appeared on my card. I was a fool.
The fact that she wouldn't brook a
rival was proof positive that she loved
me."
"Nevertheless she had no right to
make such a demand unless she was
engaged to you."
"But for that tilt I have always be
lieved she would have been my wife."
lie handed her the check. She looked
at the slguature. and her eyes seemed
riveted to It. Without raising them
the said:
"I dldu"t know your first nam was
rhll-I mean rbilander."
"It is. But why do you notice that?"
"Because'-she leaned back In her
chair and covered her face with her
hands "because mine is Douilda."
The cllcke y click of a typewriting
machine iu t e next room was all that
was heard 'or some moments, and
when Mr. S anks spoke It served to
drown his w nls.
The propo d exchange was nipped
tn the bud b the marriage of the first
man and w wn charter members.
ROSALIND HOUTON.
More than two-thirds of your life
you wear shoes. Did you ever think
of that?
The Dr. A. Reed
Cushion Shoe
Was built to give your feet comfort
two-thirds of your life; the rest you
sleep.
TheJW. L Douglas
Shoe
Has a world-wide reputation. Wear
one and be op to date.
S. A. GIMRE
543 BOND STREET.
Opposite Fisher Bros.
Best kinds of logging shoes, ham
made, always on hand.
MONEY TO LOAN,
MONEY TO LOAN ON GOOD
security, at Scandinavian-American
Savings Bank, Astoria.
Money to loan on good security.
Scandinavian-American Savings Bank.
F. I. DUNBAR
307 Astoria Savings Bank Building
INVESTMENTS
Loans, Bonds, County and City
Warrants. Agent State Land
Board for Investment Funds
Insurance
Resident Agent Globe & Rutgers'
Fire Insurance Co., of New York.
Read the Morning Astoria n.
The Louvre Concert Hall
FIRST CLASS LIQUORS
AND CIGARS
SEVENTH AND ASTOS STREETS.
Rooms in Connection.
Vic Lindbeck, Prop.
CLASSIFIED APVERTISIENENTS
NOTICE.
FOR RENT 9 ROOM HOUSE;
corner Jerome and 17th streets.
Apply to Capt Ferchen, 330 17th
street -u'
J THE TRENTON
I
X First-Class Liquors and Cigars
X 602 Commercial Street. H
J Corner Commercial and 14th. - ASTORIA, OREGON j
THE GEM
C. F. WISE. Prop.
Choice Wines, Liquors Merchants Lunch From
and Cigars - 11:30 a. m. to 1:30 p. m.
Hot Lunch at All Hours. 35 Cents
Corner Eleventh and Commercial.
ASTORIA OREOOI
TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN:
Northwestern National Insurance
Company's insurance policies Nos.
126 to ISO, inclusive, of the Astoria,
Oregon, agency of this company,
office at Astoria, Oregon, and this is
to notify any person or persons hold
ing the above policies that the same
are void and of no effect. North
western National Insurance Co., of
Milwaukee. Wis. F. N. Clark, Agent.
HELP WANTED MALE.
MALE HELP WANTED -MEN
and women to learn watchmaking,
engraving, jeweler work, optics; easy
terms; positions guaranteed; money
made learning. Watchmaking-Engraving
School, 1426 Fourth avenue.
Seattle, Wash.
SITUATION WANTED.
SITUATION WANTED BY A
youmz lady of experience, a position
as stenographer; has own machine.
Apply this office. 2-S-3t.
SITUATION WANTED BY MARRIED
woman as housekeeper) good cook,
fond of children. Address Housekeeper,
Astorian office.
FOR RENT.
FOR RENT 3 UNFURNISHED
rooms: best location; suitable for
office or housekeeping. Apply "K.,B
Astoria. 2-7-tf.
FOR RENT 2 UNFURNISHED
office rooms, near court house. In
quire 386 Commercial street, up
stairs. --
FOR RENT-A NEW MODERN
dwelling house. For particulars en
quire of Van Dusen & Co., or Phone
Black 2351. ' 2-4 tf.
ROOM AND BOARD.
Holden House Room aud board,
$5.00 per week and up. . Corner Ninth
and Duane. 2-7-7t.
FOR SALE.
FOR SALE AT WARRENTON 5-
room house: 50-foot lot; in best
condition; $1500; you can double your
money on this. "J.," Astorian office.
FOR SALE-5000 HARD BRICKS.
Enquire Geo. L. Caldwell, 453 Ex
change. 2-7-ot.
WOOD FOR SALE-PHONE RED
2186. 2-5-tf.
TWO SECOND HAND TYPE-
writers for sale cheap. Call at office
of the Astoria Abstract, Title & Trust
Co., 186 Eleventh street, Astoria,
Oregon. 1-24-lSt.
FOR SALE THE STOCK AND
fixtures of a general store located a
few miles from Astoria; very clean
stocK, and will invoice about $7000.
Particulars at
WESTERN REALTY CO.
ONE HUNDRED-ROOM HOTEL
for sale: doing a splendid business;
good opportunity for a first-class
hotel man.
WESTERN REALTY CO.
FOR SALE ONE-QUARTER OR
one-half interest in a summer re
sort hotel doing a fine business; over
100 rpoms and always engaged 'way
ahead.
WESTERN REALTY CO.
FOR SALE-THE FURNITURE
of a large lodging house; rooms
always full; low rent.
WESTERN REALTY CO.
PARTNER WANTED.
WANTKDA PARTNER IN SMALL
sanitarium; $100 required; gentleman
lady. Address Dledrloh, Astorian
dice, 1-M-tf,
LAUNDRIES.
Those Pleated Bosom Shirts
The kind known by dressy men in
the summer, are difficult articles to
launder nicely. Unless you know Just
how to do it, the front pleats won't
iron down smooth, and the shirt
front will look nmssy. Our New
Tress lroner irons tltcm without
rolling or stretching. Try it.
TROY LAUNDRY,
Tenth and Duane. Phone Main 1991
PROFESSIONAL CARDS.
ATTORNEYS-AT-LAW
CHARLES H, ABERCROMBIE
Attorney-at-Law
City Attorney Offices: City Hall
JOHN C. McCUE
Attorney-at-Law
Deputy District Attorney,
Page Building, Suite 4.
HOWARD M. BROWNELL
Attorney-at-Law
Office with Mr. J. A. Eakin, at 420
Commercal St., Astoria.
DENTISTS
DR. VAUGHAN
Dentist
Pythian Building, Astoria, Oregon
SEAL ESTATE WANTED.
DR. W. C. LOGAN
Dentist
Commercial St. Shanahan Bldg.
OSTEOPATHS.
DR. RHODA C HICKS
Osteopath
Office Mansell Bltlg. Phone Black 2061
5' 3 Commercial St., Astoria, Ore.
MASSAGING.
Massaging
IN ALL ITS BRANCHES; WARM
baths if necessary; thorough com
petency is assured.
MRS. M. HEYNO,
87 W. Bond Street, Astoria.
BUSINESS DIRECTORY.
RESTAURANTS.
Columbia
Restaurant
3381 Bond St, Cor. 8th and Bona.
First-Class Meals,
Reasonable Prices.
Our Special Dishes.
Noodles and Chop Suey.
Everything First-class.
YEE YICK, Manager.
TOKIO RESTAURANT.
351 Bond Street.
Opposite Ross, Iliggins & Co.
Coffee with Pie or Cake 10 Cts.
FIRST-CLASS MEALS
Regular Meals 15 Cts. and Up,
U, S. RESTAURANT.
. 434 Bond Street
Coffee with Pie or Cake, 10 Cts.
First-Class Meals, 15 Cts.
"ARM WANTEDCOULD PAY $800
on small f&rmi 20 acres bottom lanJ
balance tornisi must be near Astoria,
on county road. Address P, 0. Box 8,
Warrenton, Ore,
HOUSE MOVERS.
FRKDRICKSON BROS.-We make
a specialty of house moving, car
penters, contractors, general jobbing;
prompt attention to all orders, Cor
ner Tenth and Duane street.
HOTELS.
mm
II. a Porker, E. P. Parker,
Proprietor. Manager.
PARKER HOUSE
EUROPEAN PLAN
First-class in Every Respect Free
Coach to the House. Bar and Billiard
Room. Good Check Restaurant. Good
Sample Rooms on the Ground Floor
for Commercial Men.
ASTORIA, OREGON.
NORTHERN HOTEL
Astoria's Newest and Best Hotel.
Eleventh and Duane Streets
Rooms, Single or cn Suite, Steam
Heated. Baths, Running Water in
Every Room.
Rates, 50c to $150; Special by
Week. Phone Main 3911.
MRS. J. COLLINS, Manager.
SPRING GOODS
ARE HERE
Order your spring suit
now while my line is com
plete. Some beautiful effects
in tans, slates and London
smokes. A perfect fit guar
anteed and prices within
reach of all.
Carl E. Fransecn,
ASTORIA'S LEADING TAILOR,
179 Eleventh Street. Phone M&Jn 3711
"If it's from Franseen it's right"
Read the Morning Astorian 60 cents
per month. Delivered by carry ler.
MEDICAL.
Unprecedented
SueoesMt ' of
I.C-
TEE GREAT
CHINESE DOCTOR
' V vtrkn I.
throughout the United
wis
jfM$$r$i suu on oirat of
mt&m wonderful eum.
No poisons or drum usee. He guaran
tees to cure catarrh, asthma, lung and
throat trouble, rheumatism,' nervousness,
stomach, liver sod kidney, female com
plaints and all chronic diseases.
SUCCESSFUL HOME TREATMENT.
If you cannot call write for symptom
blank and circular, inclosing 4 cents is
stamps.
THE C GEE WO MEDICINE CO.
162) First St., Corner Morrison,
PORTLAND, OREGON.
Please mention the Astorian.
HOTEL PORTLAND
finest Hotel in the Northwest
PORTLAND, ORE.
European Plan Only.
H. C. BOWERS, Manager.
FISH MARKET.
Seattle
FisI
He
77 Ninth St., near Bond
'Fresh and Salted Fish.
Game and Poultry.
Groceries, Produce and Fruit
Imported and Domestic
Goods.
P. Bakotitch & Feo, Proprs.
Phone Rd 2183
FURNITURE,
Hildebrand & Gor
Our clearing sale runs
the year through,
BARGAINS AT ANY TIME
467 Commercial Street.
WINES AND LIQUORS.
Eagle Concert Hall
(320 Astor Street)
Rooms for rent by the day, week, or
month. Best rates in town.
P. A. PETERSON, Prop
Morning Astorian, 60 cents month.
Delivered by carrier.
Mini
PLUMBERS.
.1
PLUMPER
Heating Contractor, Tinner
-AND-
Sheet Iron Worker
ALL WORK GUARANTEED
425 Bond Street.
UNDERTAKERS,
J. A. OlLHAKlll & CO.,
;Uiittrtukr ttml Kmlmliiiera.
l'KerltiioMl l,ny AsslNtMiit
When DcsirtMl.
Calls Promptly Attended Day
1 ; or Night.
TnUoii Ildif. 12th ami Duane HU
AHTOICIA. OUK.UON
Photi MnliiUlit
BOAT BUILDER.
T, L. DriscoH!
BOATBUILDINQ AND REPAIR
I NO A SPECIALTY.
22nd and Exchange Street
TRANSPORTATION.
The "K" Line
PASSENGERS FREIOHT
Steamer Lurline
Night Boat for Portland and
Way Landings.
Leaves Astoria daily except Sunday
at 7 p. m.
Leaves Portland Dally except Sunday
at 7 a. m.
Quirk Service Excellent Msala
Good Bertha
Landing Astoria Plavel Wharf.
Landing Portland Foot Taylor St
O. B. BLESSING, Agent
Phone Main 2761.
TRANSPORTATION.
CANADIAN PACIFIC
TKMPRC 88" Lin of th AUantlo
LESS THAN FOUR DAYS AT SEA
During the summer season, the
Empresses sail from Quebec to Liver
pool; fast and luxurious. Nine hun
dred miles in sheltered waters of the
St Lawrence River and Gulf. Short
ocean trip. Use this route and avoid
sea sickness,
Summer sailing lists and rates now
ready.
Apply to any Ticket Agent, or
James Finlayson, Agent, Astoria, Or,
TRANSPORTATION.
TIME CARD
Astoria & Columbia River R. R. Co
Effective, Ifonday, September g, 1907 Pacific Tims.
uh r. hi 1 .ill 1
t
B
0
$
a
J
.US
TM
.
8.411
8.4H
8.4
8.M
ai
iS.ro.
it
'i
Qa
M
9.15
0 85
p.m.
8 60
a iu
m
6.!
8.2tl
t.m
24
p.m
n.uu
7.31
1.M
T.W
8.0ft
H 13
ft. HI
S.W
11.40
8.00
9.211
t.ar,
U 67
10 OS
10 v
o:m
10 M
II 4ft
11.4.',
U.OIil
il.4
ih.H
M.9
ft.
'2.8
71.
78.7
09.8
W.8
106.7
S.ftftl 0.461
S.I810.1H
9.16 10.25
9.H010 80
a.m.H.m
6.401
7.11
7.20
7.25
p.m.
12.051
W.l
12.40
W.4n
p.m
TosT
116.7
118.1
119.1
Lv.
Ar.
...X '1W LAnuTii"M.i .
Lv OOH1.K4 AIT
,. KAINIKIt
MAYUr K
OUINCV
... CXATHKANIK JUNCTION!.,
.WKHT10KT.
(jUKTON
Ar AKTOMAt ;lv
Lv AHTOHIA Ar
Ar. WAKKKNTON 1,V
Trtj.rTEvTrrrrrwAiiiiPNTCKt af
HAMMOND ,
Ar. FT. HTEVKNH Lv
Lv FT. HTKVKNM Ar
HAMMOND
Ar WAItU K NTON Lv
Lv WAUKKNTON ...... Ar'
..UKAKHAKT
....MKAHIDKt
Ar. IIOLLAIMY. .... Lv
119.1
79.7
78.S
M.I
69.8
M.S
47.9
40.4
191
111. 8
18.4
17.9
MS
IS 4
84
1.0
0.0
m
.161
10.661
10.401
10 16
1005
9.62
9.81
9.16
0.00
8,40!
S.261
7.69
7.50
7.4d
7. iS
7.04
1. aw s.i
8.16
7.661
7.46
7.44
7.41
7.88
T.2S
t 67
6 46
urn
TM
6.08
6. on
4.66
p.m
-co
M
11.00
6 Nil 9 46 I
6.8ft 2 IWI0.40
s.ioiio.at
3 atjlO.HS
fl.OOjlO.J
n.2,Vio.oo
12.10110.11
(1.261
10.6'jl
10.461
10.88
m
10.
9.
.41
9.H
a.m.
Hoi. 20 and 28 run from Astoria to uiatsop ueacb via Ft, Stevens. No. M
runs from Portland to A"toria and Clatsop Beaeh direot. No. 24 runs frosi
Portland to Astoria only. No. 80 runs from Astoria to Clatsop Beaeh direot.
Nos. 21, 25 and 29 run via Ft. Stevens. No. 23 runs from Clatsop Beaeh to
Astoria and Portland direct. Additional train will be run from Astoria to It
Stevens and return on Sundays, leaving Astoria lli30 a, m., arrive Ft Stevens
12:20 j. m. Returning leaves Ft Stevtns 2:00 p. m., arrives Astoria 1:40 p. as
CONNECTIONS At Portland, with all transcontinental lines. At Oobls,
with Northern Paclflo Railway Co. At Aatoria with steamers for San Francises
and Tillamook and Bwaco Railway k Navigation Co.'i boat and railway.
Through tickets sold to and from all points in the But and Europe, "for
further particulars apply to. R, tt JENKINS,
Qn. Ft A Paasngr. A el,
. ASTORIA, OREOON.
in t ,'
1