TRICKS DFTHE TYPES
'' ft'1.'. "'"'' r l" . : '" '., . ,
kicked Deeds Done by the Imp
of the Perverse.
AMUSING ERRORS IN PRINT.
.i;;jfj Hfty'V"' ' " '' y
Example of What It Liable to Happen
) Whan tha Compositor Blunder or
; Whan tha Usually Alert, and Cart
t ful Proofreader Node. , , ;
' Sometimes the proofreader noda, and
la this . connection the ; late - Lord
Ooschen told at a public dinner a story
of a reader s who worked for his (Lord
'Goschen'B) grandfather and who, In
answer, to a denunciation from his em
ployer, cried; V''",'l "
"Let eoine other man work at cor
rectness of typography. I despair. . My
own thoughts often hinder roe as they
seize and hold the authors otherwise
than they ought to do. It Is quite pos
sible that niggling about words and
iayllables may often go to Jhe wall
when my soul cannot tear Itself loose
from some thought or picture. Errors
ihave been found In sheets which I
(thought I had worked backward And
forward with the greatest particular
ity. I read always as It should be."
i It Is when a reader Is In this soulful
eondltlon that the general public are
permitted . to; read, as; then ld one
sq a morning paper not given to humor,
(that a celebrated politician, to a
iepeech, described som one as "sitting
tat the feet of the game bird of Blr
ingham," instead of "Gamaliel" In
,the tame Journal, too, the following
WtarUlng announcement ' appeared nn
,er the heading of "Births:"
KICH0L80N.-On the 12th Inst, at Bu
tton load. Bldcup. the eon of Alfred Nlch
lalaoa, of a daughter.
J la another newspaper a most pathet
ilc account appeared of a doctor who
idled owing to having accidentally In
fected himself while injecting some
iplagne Tiros into a "gnat" The mys
tery was solved the next day, when an
japology was printed explain ting that
tie word should have been "rat"
, "Come over and" try some new
ioup," a lady novelist did not write;
rsongs" was the word. "It Is a sickly
opJ of the real article" was perhaps
xcusable. It appeared In a paper
aluruur the Boer war.
; These mistakes are curious enough,
tint they pale Into Insignificance before
come of those that never reach the
printed sheet "
"Cold milk, fatberr once demanded
m compositor in cold type, and he was
aggrieved to have to alter It to "Caed
enllle fallthe!? "Brer Fox" was made
'Boer Fox" that was also during the
South African war. , ;
. On a hot summer's day another tired
typesetter turned "The Ides of March"
tato,"The Idea of Work."
In a sermon a celebrated divine was
made to say, "And they erected a ma
rine store at' the mouth of the sepul
cher." "Massive stone" were the cor
lect words.
1 Abbreviations are at times the bane
f the compositor, but he had no ex
cuse In Betting up, in an account of a
Mansion House function, that among
those present were "Old Isaacs and Old
ffteloar." He should have known that
rAKL" was an abbreviation of "Alder
man." . In the same "take" of copy the
"Lord Mayor was received with , a
rash" (should ; be "eclat") and was
fkIlowed by the sheriffs In their "mar:
parine (mazarine) gowns."
"Let the gulled Judy wink" appeared
In another first proof, and the proof
reader wearily made it the "galled Jade
wince," "Die, lusty platter!' has quite
a transpontine flavor, but the "copy"
aid "Die Lustige Blatter" (a German
weekly paper).
"Pignut of the enunciation" does not
eem convincing; "figment of the Imag
ination" is better. "Petticoats long on
Sunday morning Is a disgrace" Is all
right , when the first two words are
Bead "Petticoat lane." i :"
In a police court assault case the
prosecutor was made to say that the
erisoner had given him "twins." What
the prisoner really did was to give the
prosecutor a "turn" (a fright). 'The
government were suffering from men
tal aberration," must have been set
up by a compositor of the opposition
politics. The real charge was mutual
admiration." , , ; ...
J "De mortar ivil nice loreum" would
trouble a Latin scholar. "De mortuls
nil nisi bonum" is more correct "Jim
Che Pieman" Is easily recognizable as
the hero of a play, and "Putty Polly,"
the ' racehorse, would throw up her
pretty head in disdain to see herself
so described. 'f ,v. ....',;''
For "a pair of scandals completed
the costume" read "sandals," and for
"Here, Is Indeed a sundial" substitute
"scandal." He lived in the 'hubbubs"
. should, be "suburbs," and "Call her,
Herr,' In" Is understandable .; when
printed "Caller herrln." f
A well known descriptive writer was
startled to read in a rough first proof
that he had described the fields sur
rounding the Derby course as "covered
with boots and shoes." He was pla
nted when Informed that it had been
altered to "booths and shows."
, Columns could be filled with the
amazing and amusing blunders of tha
compositor, but here space forbids of
Bore than a final "howler," which Is a
Classic In the printing world. "0 tem
poral O mores!"! wrote a leader writ
er ai ten minutes u x iu iue uwiums.
"Q Moses, indeed!" ' exclaimed the
proofreader a. quarter of an hour later
when he "caught and bowled" the com
positor who had Improved the phrase
Into "0 Tennyson! O Moses" London
Emress. ' - .' '
QOEER LIZARDS. -
Thaaa Have tha Power of 8pout1nf
B'ood From tha Eyet.
That certain' lizards have the power
to emit a stream of blood from their
eyes has been a tradition of the south'
west from time out of mind, but many
scientists have classed it with the Jew
el In the toad's head and the hoop
snake. Raymond Lee Dltmara, curator
of reptiles in the New Xork Zoological
society, made exhaustive research to
ascertain what foundation in fact, It
any, there is in the tradition of the
blood spouting lizards. He had nearly
made nip his mind that tt was purely
mythical when he' came upon a star
tling demonstration of Its truth. He
had received a particularly fine speci
men of the Mexican horned lizard and
after photographing It proceeded to
measure it The result he tells In his
"Reptile Book."
"The latter process," he says, "seem
ed to greatly excite the creature. It
finally threw the head slightly up
ward, the neck became rigid, the eyes
bulged from the, sockets, when there
was a distinct; sound like that pro
duced If one pressed , the tongue
against the roof of the .. mouth and
forced a small quantity of air forward.
This rasping sound, consuming but the
fraction of a second, was accompanied
by a jet of blood at great pressure.
7Jt hit, the wall four feet away at
the same level as that of the reptile.
The duration of the flow of blood ap
peared to be about one and a halt
seconds, and toward Its termination
the . force gradually diminished, as
noted by a course of drops down tha
wall and along the floor to a position
almost under the spot where the rep
tile had been held. . The stream of
blood seemed to be as fine as hone
hair and to issue from the eyelid,
which was momentarily much swollen.
' "For some time after the perform
ance the eyes were tightly closed, and
nothing could induce the lizard to open
them. Within two minutes after it
was. placed on the ground the protrud
lng aspect of the eyeballs and the
swelling of the eyelids had disap
peared.. '' ' ,V.y..i. -
"Most surprising was .the amount of
blood expended. The wall and floor
showed a course of thickly sprinkled
spots about one-eighth of an inch la
diameter. There were 103 of these
spots." Philadelphia North American.
CLASSIFIED ADVERTISING.
HELP WANTED.
WTANTED A COOD BOY. TO DRIVE
bus. Apply Northern Hotel, Eleventh
and Duane streets .7 1; 10-16-4t.
WANTED A GOOD GIRL ABOUT 12
or 14 years of age, will give her a
good home. Address Mrs. L. Beneke,
Jewell, Oregon. ; . , , , xu-ia-at.
WANTED A TEACHER FOR SCHOOL
district No. 11, Skamokawa, , Wab
klum county, Wash. term, nine months,
salary $50 pW month j don't answer this
except prepared to fill position at once.
" -: ":;.; v .-. 10-10-7t.
WANTED A POSITION BY A YOUNG
lady of experience an stenographer.
Address to Astorian office. 10-0-121.
SITUATION WANTED.
POSITION WANTED A GIRL OF 14
wants a home in Astoria while going
to school; will work for her board.
Telephone Scandinavian Cannery. . 16 2t
SITUATION WANTED IN WARE
house, dry goods store or hardware in
city where willingness to work will make
up for inexperience; object not wages,
but desire to gain practical experience;
aged 42; married; speaks American,
Finn, little Norwegian and , Swedish.
Address, "A. J," 127 Seventh St. l0-7t.
FOR SALE REAL ESTATE. , .
fi 0B 8AUWCWO LOTS IN ASTORIA
and one in Warrentonj will sell cheap.
Address "J Astorian office. V '.,
A BIG BARGAIN 100x100 FEET IN
center of city on Bond street Apply
to Western Realty Co.
THE PAY CAR.
Its-Coin Rack, Crammed With Yellow
Boys, a Tempting Siflht
The good old days are gone. In these
heathen tltnes railroad men are paid
by check. Of the pay car and Its luxu
rious travels C. F. Carter writes In the
American Magazine as follows: v .'
"A metal coin rack crammed to the
FARM FOR SALE. $2250160 ACRES;
six acres cleared, good house and
barn. Western Realty Co.
MISCELLANEOUS.
' MISCELLANEOUS. "
PROTECT YOURSELF FOR $1 PER
month against accident, ilokneis and
Jeath; furnishes dootort, dentistry, med
icines and hospital service. Call or write,
National Hospital Asn., room 3. Page
block. . i 0-8-tf.
HOUSE M0VER3.
.AMUSEMENTS.
PLEASANT HOUR
, ; . OF . , ' . ,
ENTERTAINMENT
NOTICE TO STOCKHOLDERS
Notice is hereby given that a special
meeting of the stockholders of the
Portland, Oregon, Seaooast Railway
Company will be hold at the Company's
office, 670 WorcesterDuildlng, In the.
city of Portland and State of Oregon,
it 3 o'clock, on Saturday, the 26th day
of October, 1007, fot the following pur- REDRICKSON iBROS-We. make a
Roseaj ' f , .,. iipeolalty: of house moving, earptntera,
FIRST. To increase said Company's tractors, general jobblngt prompt at
capital stock, now $500,000, to $1,100,-1 tentlon to all orders. Corner Tenth and
000, and when such inoreae of capital ; putne,
Is approved by said meeting of stock
holders to issue not more than 11,000
shares in all of $100 each for the flftt
100 miles of rallwey to be built and
owned by it, apportioned as said meet
ing of stockholders shall direct, f
SECOND. To ratify, confirm and ap
prove of contracts heretofore made under
authority from aald Company's Board
of Directors for the sale of 100 miles
of this Company's first mortgage five
per cent bonds, and alo of the deed of
trust or mortgage securing payment of
same to the holders of said bonds.
THIRD. To ratify, confirm and ap
prove in whole or in part of contract,
or any portion , thereof made by said
Board of Director! for the construction
of this Company's first 100 miles of
railway, commencing at the Lewis and
Clarke river, and at Clatsop station
Oregon; westerly therefrom and east
erly to the Willamette river near to
Portland, and f
FOURTH. To transact and consider
whatever other business may be brought
before said meeting, of which notice
la hereby given to stockholders of said
Railway Company. '
(Signed) H. HAWGOOD, of Los An
geles, California, President.
William Reid, of Portland, Oregon, Sec
retary of Portland Oregon Eeacoaet
Railway Company,
Dated at New York, September 13, 1907.
FOR ' SALE STORE 22x40, AND LOT
25x125, Warrenton, Price, : $1600.
Western Realty Co.,495 Commercial St
FOR RENT.
FOR RENT A SUITE OF FURNISH
ed housekeeping rooms. 677 Exchange
street. 10-ll-7t.
LOST AND FOUND.
LOST-aAN OPEN FACE GOLD WATCH
Elgin movement. Finder return to this
office and receive liberal reward. 10-16-St
at Cosy
charges.
Corner Saloon
and paying
10-15-4t.
MISCELLANEOUS.
T?rTTVTLTTAMnvn TiYTKET' OWNER
SSS?. JSTJi canhavesame by calling on Paddy Lynch
j ciiv vv wv; Of uuuatu n tui ou v vs. ( uuu
on the dekeebind It a very large
wooden tray, on which were long col
umns of yelJow coins d'ye ever see
anything so pretty in all your life?
No wonder your eyes stuck out until
you could have used them for hat
pegs.'. ; 7'- '" ".
"And all the time an exquisitely mu
sical tinkle, tinkle, clink-clink' welled
up from coin rack and counter In re
sponse to the calls of the assistant
WANTED SEVEN HUNDRED VOL-
lars on good security. P. O. Box 761,
Astoria, Ore. ; .. 10-17-3t.
paymaster. Talk about Beethoven's
symphonies! ' r -
"If it werfe not for that strong wire
screen you could have touched that
fascinating tray. For the infinitesimal
fraction of a second a wicked thought
flitted through your brain. Then you
almost fainted as your roving eye
Btared down the barrel of a monstrous
revolver. It was only In a rack, but It
was within easy reach of the paymas
ter's hand and most eloquent for all
that Half a dozen of its fellows lay
in the handiest places, while as many
Winchesters lying on tables and set
tees came in strong on the chorus..
"Hurriedly your vagrant wits busied
themselves with all' the Sunday school
lessons you had ever learned. As your
subconsciousness : perceived' that the
head of the road's secret service de
partment stood on the platform with
his eyes intent on every man in the
car at once, while Conductor Llnken
pln stood on the ground outside very
much alert, with his coat tall bulging
suggestively, your bosom swelled with
pride over the watchful care the com
pany had exercised to bring its honest
toilers their bard earned money."
Long Winded.
"It takes you a pretty long while to
shave yourself, doesn't It?.' .
"Not so very long. I can shave my
self quicker than my old barber oould.'?
"I don't believe it."
"It's a fact. You see, he stammers
terribly."-rhiladelphia Press.
Studying how to help and benefit oth
ers will build up your own fortune.
Baltimore American.
It is what you are not looking for
that gives the spice of variety to liftv
Detroit News.
it
NOTICE ON ACCOUNT OF SICK-
ness, Tong Kee, the Ninth street laun
dry man, has disposed of his business
to Hong Hing. All persons owing long
Kee are requested to call at the laundry
and settle their bills. Hong Hing will
not be responsible for any debts con
tracted by his predecessor. . 10-9-5t.
REPRESENTATIVES IN EVERY Lo
cality, to sell our teas, coffees, baking
powder,' etc, direct . to the consumer;
good pay to right party; wagon equip
ment and splendid inducement, as aids
to secure business, furnished free of
charge; no graft; investigation solicited.
Address, stating experience and refer-
. m tin t-tt .
ence. Grand union xea jo., o vvasn-
intrton street. Portland, Oregon. 10-15-2
o -
ASSESSOR'S NOTICE -EQUALIZA-Uon
of 1907 Assessment. To the Tax-
VAUDEVILLE AT THE LOUVRE
And Vaudeville that really
Amuses and Interests you.
Weekly Changes of Pro
gram and Each Change an
Improvement
SPECIALTIES THIS WEEK
LITTLB MISS FRISCO
v Song and Dsnee Artist
THELMA BECKS ' "
Balladlst
' ALMA PIESCB
Swedish Nightingale
PRINCESS 0 ME ANA
The World's Wonder Don't Fall to
ADMISSION FREI
VIC LINDBECK, Prep.
BUSINESS DIRECTORY.
RESTAURANTS.
TOKIO RESTAURANT.
831 Bond Street.
' Opposite Ro, Jllgglns & Co.
Coffee with Pie or Cake so Cts.
FIRST-CLASS MEALS.
Regular Meals is Cts. and Up.
U. S. RESTAURANT.
; 434 Bond Street.,
Coffee with Pie or Cake 10 Cts, '
First Class Meals ij Cents.
OPEN DAY AND NIOHT.
ASTORIA RESTAURANT
MANO HINO, Prop. '
U'hone 1081 Main. OIW Ilond St.
The Finest sjc. Meal Served in Astoria,
-Game in Season,
Your Patronage Solicited.
.Courteous Treatment to All.
PROFESSIONAL CARD.
ATTORNEYS-AT-LAW
r--iJiaiiir'iiiiJiT-in n m s - -
JOHN C McCUE, , . , ,
Attorney-At-Law.
Deputy District Attorney.
Page Building, Suite 4
HOWARD M. fclOWNEU,
Attorney-At-Law.
Office with Mr, J. A. laUa, at Ne. 4S0
Commercial St, Astoria.
DRUGGIST.
Colombia Drug Co.
' Dr. Charles C. C. Rosenberg
(Successors to Dr. Linton's Drag Co.)
Drugs, Medicines
! ; : Toiiet Articles.
Prescriptions Carefully Compounded.
payere of Clatsop County, Oregon:
Notice is hereby given that the Board
of Equalization for Clatsop County,
Oregon, will convene at the Clerk's office
(at the court house, In Astoria, on the
list day of October, 1907, the same being
the third Monday in said month and the
time fixed by law for the meeting of
said Board of Equalization, which will
continue its sessions from day to day,
exclusive of Sundays and. legal holidays.
until the examination and correction
and equalization of the assessment rolls,
m ! . - l.1t l. .-n.nl.J. ..hint. ' ' , -t ,
-a jr - u """iDr. Rosenburg will
a... nAa will ahn . inn. in .huam vnr i w
one month from said date, unless the
labors thereof are sooner completed.
Petitions or applications for the re
duction of a particular assessment shall
be made in writing, verified by the oath
of the applicant or his attorney and
filed -with the Board during the first
week it is by law required to be in ses
sion, and any petition or application not
10 made, verified, and filed shall not be
considered or acted upon by the Board.
T. S. CORNELIUS,
Assessor for Clatsop County, Oregon.
, 'V 10-6-tf.
PROPOSALS.
NOTICE OF SALE OF SCHOOL WAR-
, Mints Notice is hereby given, that
School "District No. 1, of Clatsop county,
Oregon, will receive sealed bids from the
bona fide ' residents 01 saia scnooi ais-
trict, at the office of the Clerk of said
district ,in the City Hall, at Astoria,
Oregon, until 12:00 o'clock (noon) of
Monday, the 21st day of October, 1907,
for the purchase of nineteen tnousand
dollars, par value, of interest-bearing
warrants of said distwet, bearing in
terest at five (5) per cent per annum,
payable semi-annually, which .warrants
will be dated November 1st, 1907, and
will be payable as follows: ' $3000.00 in
one year, $4000.00 in two years, $4000.00
in three years, $4000.00 in four years,
and $4000.00 in five years. Said bids
may be for warrants in amounts from
fifty ($50.00) dollars to nineteen thou
sand ($19,000.00) dollars, and must state
the terms on which the warrants will
be taken, whether at a premium, at par,
or at a discount. Each person will be
entitled to but one bid, and all bids
must be addressed to "A. L. Clark, Clerk
of School District No. 1," Astoria, Ore
gon, and must be endorsed "Proposal
for school district warrants,". All bids
will be opened at the office of said clerk,
on said 21st day of October, at 2 :00
o'clock p. m., '
: Dated. October 10, 1907, at Astoria,
, Oregon. , . . 1 - . .
A. JU UUAK1V,
Clerk of School District No. 1, Clatsop
rniintv. Oregon. ., , 10-lM0t.
' - ; d
LAUNDRIES,
THOSE PLEATED BOSOM SHIRTS
The kind known by ihessy men la the
summer, are difficult articles to launder
nicely. Unless you : know just how to
do It,' the front pleata won't Iron down
smooth, and the shirt front will look
mussy. Our New Press Ironer Irons
them without rolling or stretching. Try
it. Troy Laundry, Tenth and Duane.
Phone Jkfaln 1991.
B7 Morning Astorian, M tti far
month, delivered by carrier.
it
. . . JT. .T;i
give coniultations
and examination free.
is Eleventh Street :
Telephone Main 1171, " Astoria, Ore.
UNDERTAKERS.
w U n 1 w a trt au. a.
O, At UlbUAUUU Oi. VV.,
Undertakers and Embaliuers-
Experienced Lady Assistant
When Desired. ;
r.rr '
CallH Promptly Attended Day
, or Nlglit. ,
Patton Bdg. 12th and DuoaeSts
ASTOKIA, ORE.OON
Phone Main 211 J
WINES, LIQURS AND CIGARS.
Eagle Concert Hall
' , (320 Astor St.)
- Rooms for rent by the day, week, or
month. Best rates in town. -
P. A. PETERSON, Prop,
HOTELS
TAKE YOUR CHOICE.
SMALL RANCH, 45 ACRES, 20 CLEAR-
ed; small house and barn 7 good
milch cows, sell 10 gallons daily $ 2 good
farm horses,:; 30 j sheep, 75 . chickens?
plenty good wood and water) 10 miles
from city, 21 miles from RR. depot; for
cash or half down; easy ternis for bal
ance; best bargain in this county.
CHOICE LOTS FOR BUIIDfNGS.
12( HOUSES AND ' LOTS, VALUES
from $4000 to $1000, or even less; afl
on easy terms.
NORTHERN HOTEL
MRS.' J. COLLINS, Prop.'
Steam Heat, Baths, Nw and Modern.
Running water in every room. ' Rooms
76c, $1.00, $U0. . Suites V the week. $5
' Eleventh and Duane Streets.
ASTORIA, ORE
Phone Main 3911
hotel Portland
Finest Hotel in the Northwest
. .... PORTLAND, ORE.
TIMBER CLAIMS.
TID
k LANDS. "
BALANCE , LIST CALL
' over. ' ' ... .
AND LOOK
O. F. MORTON.
430 COMMERCIAL. , '
:,,.v JAPANESE GOODS.. ;
INEXPENSIVE
JAPANESE FIXINGS, MADE OF BAM
: BOO, LIGHT, STRONG, r HAND-
MADE, TABLES, STANDS, CHAIRS,
'' WHAT ?N0TSr BOOKCASES, SHELV-
ING, ETC. ' l'V - -
Yokohama Bazaar
Nl25 Commercial St., Astoria.' w
STENOGRAPHERS.'
LENORA E. BEN0IT,
Public' Stenographer,
Telephone 3031 . 395 Commercial St,
Dictation called for.
DENTISTS.
Dr. VAUGHAN,
DENTIST '
Pythian Building, Astoria, Oregon,
DR. W. C LOGAN
DENTIST
Commercial St. Shanahan Balldln
OSTEOPATHS.
wsaWai
: DR. RH0DA C HICKS
OSTEOPATH
Offlca afanseu Bid. rnone Black lell
171 Commercial SC. Astoria. Ore.
MEDICAL.
Unprecedented
Suoceises of
D. I U
TEE GREAT
CHINESE D0CT0S
Who la known
tbrousbont the United
j States on account of
jihla wonderful niree.
No polsona or drugs used. He guaran
tees to cure catarrh, asthma, lung and
throat trouble, rheumatism, nervousness,
stomach, liver and kidney, female com
plaint and all chronic diseases.
SUCCESSFUL HOME TREATMENT.
If you cannot call write for symptom
blank and circular, inclosing 4 cents in
stamps. '
THE C. GEE WO MEDICINE, CO.
102 First St., Corner Morrison,
Portland, Oregon.
Please mention the Astorian. v
TRANSPORTATION.
rnitKnuini, rnaiUMT.
The KM Une
:SLkM 1 iriitDi'iNM1 if1 v-
n-y Hi i ,, 1 JZr I- M
rVfitfWMB- Kr 4
'SjA"VinT ),m 1 -i - 1 n 1 .'. ii.ittnT1'
Steamer - Lurline
Night Doat'for Portland and .
Way Landings.
Leaves Astoria daily except Sunday at
Leaves Portland Daily except Sunday
as 7 a. m.
Quick Service Excellent Meals'
; , , Good Berths, .:;..!.
Landing Astoria Flavel Wharf.
Landing Portland Foot Taylor St
-.'lism -fir:!
' 0. B.' BLESSING, Agent
Phone Main 7Ji. ; sK;;
', Steanien:::?:',r,lt?';T
TEtEGRAPH
The only Steamboat maklm
eiceptTnunHlay between Portland am
a ronnd trip DAILY
d Astoria
and atv nnlnadl
NO WAY POINTS ON SUNDAY f
"Portland Laodlnii, Alder Btreet Dock
Astoria UodlDg, Oallender Dock
ImrtToftimA T:00 a, m.( arrive Astorla,l:89
p. m, Leave Astoria 2:30 p. m.: arrive Portland
V ; SUNDAY EXCURSIONS
Leave Portland B a. m.t arrive Astoria 1 p.m.
Leave Astoria S p. m., arrive Portland 9 p. m.
REALESTATEWANTED.
WANTED TO BUY HOUSE AND LOT
in Astoria. Address "H I.,! core At
Wrlaa office; Give full particulars. ;