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About The morning Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1899-1930 | View Entire Issue (Nov. 4, 1906)
THE MORNING ASTOHIAN, ASTORIA, OREGON. 8 Brother Gardner's New Dream Book UN DAY, NOVEMBER 4, 1008. Ho InvcnU One For That Fa moui Organization, the Lime kiln Club. M Copyright. ltM, by C. II. Hlrt.) rreun," wild Brother fJartl nei president of the Miue kiln club, iin ha rose tin In 111 llllU'8 nf the lUHt tlll'i'tlUH of that fuuioim organliatlon, "I novo boon (loin' my best for do Inst tou year Id riiiivliiriMt 'ciiU'd race dat rtnr was iiuthln' in ilii'iiiim ninl signs. I Una spoken, mid I Iium written. I hn ben thrcnli'iiMil t . end member f dltt chili wli. M .l In lii'llt'vlii'. Flmlln' tint II illl n .. . to talk uud wrlto and Out do cull'd mini mid WO' man wouldn't let u" of dolr NtipcrNd buim, I Imii adopted i!iiKldr cciiime. "I bold up to your view a pamphlet. It nut entitled 'Itruddor iiinlncr' Drciini mid Wgn Honk. All Ihvmv Explained. All Hlgim Interpreted.' At de rlon of d meetlu' I w tut II lie linpiy to aupiiJy miy or nil of you wld din "a white noun ciuaix' a iilac. cow OIIKIl A flllKKN mUIX)W." pamphlet At de mill) of 25 rent. For your oiillKliK'umiMit mid dnt you iiiuy know wlia t you urn luiylu' I will rend off ii few of d contents: "AH T I Ml HAMS. "If you dream dnt you saw a white boss chiiHla' u Muck cow ober it green meadow toward a blue bum It signi fies dat do next time you ko out urter poultry a policeman mn gwlno to be dar to iinb you. t have do utime of litiiulriMl person who liavo dreamed din (Iron id mid been collared 'kaso doy didn't obey de warnln'. "If you drown dnt you xaw a possum lode top limbs of a persimmon tree and dat you couldn't clliub up artur him oil account of bavin' two wooden lain It Igiilflos dat your aunt am gwluo to expire and leave you money. "To dream dat you are trabblln over atony keutry In rain aud darkness and dat you Htuldctily ran agin de borim of a cow and wait loaned up Into a mulborsy tree signifies dat you will euruiouiit your present trubbluit aud come out on top. "If you no to aleep wld three dugs under de bed and de baby cryln' wld de colli: and de old woman llcklu' de rest of do cblll'en and dream dat a watermllyon you mn brlngln' home auddenly tftriJM Into a yaller cnt who fplts In your face look out for yourself. Burglars am gwlue to break Into your cabin, llghtnln' am gwluo to strike du chimney, mid your landlord am com In' around for do back rent and act mighty ugly about It "To dream dat you am skatm' on Ice In de Hummer signifies dat good luck am coiulu' to you next winter. At de very least your uncle will die and leave you a mewl. "If you go to (deep tlilnkln' of angels and golden harptt und dream dat you am a member of do IcglHlnturo und havo been offered a price to vote for a aartln Mil, be mighty keerful for de next two week, Slch a dream signi fies dunger. Don't alt under a dead tree or walk across n shaky bridge. "Brudder Calamity Jones of din club dreamed one night dat bo was rldln' through de darkness and rain on dc ahoulders of a witch woman and dat alio suddenly kicked up and frowed him off Into n quagmire, where ho was sucked down. Ho como ober to my house at 3 o'clock In do uiawulu' to ask uie to Interpret dat dream. I told him dat It algullled a change of luck, und do very next day ho found a dia mond ring In do road. "To dream dnt you am trabblln' ou foot and have stopped at u wayside hotel kept by a red headed man havln' u cross eyed wife and a yaller eyed dawg and dat In de night do landlord came up to your room nn' killed you wld n crowbar signifies dnt your ole woman nin tlilnkln' of riiniiln' away wld n cull'd man who am attached to a sideshow of a circus. "To dream of falling from a great height and comln' down on top of a picket fence and havln throe pickets run through your body would seem at first sight to signify a calamity. Dat am a mistake, however. It signifies dat you will meet a cull'd man from de kentry and Invite him to shoot craps wld you and clean him filter $25. Try and dream dls dream as often as you kin. It will enable you to lib without hard work. "One jQlatt, six montb&jasa. Brad- Come to this Store for the Very Values in All- Wool Blankets Underw Vha Announcement of a Week Ago . in Which We Gave Details of Our First Great Woolen Goods Sale Created a veritable sensation, and well there might be a sensation, for values like these have never before been offered to the Astoria public. This sale is inaugurated mainly for an educational purpose. It was begun with the idea of having everybody in this city and vicinity know that a WOOLEN MILL STORE is the most logical place for BUYING WOOLEN GOODS. Judging from the crowds which thronged our store all week, Astoria people are eager for this sort of au education an education which tends to true economy buying the best at least cost. MEN'S AND WOMEN'jLJjMO ALL-WOOL UNDERWEAR AT 95c Nil r.w i i ict We can conscientiously guarantee this to be the best un derwear bargain that has ever been offered in Astoria. This underwear is pure wool, perfectly made, comes in gray and iu light brown. The actual value is 1.50 per garment on sale at 05c. This is only one of the many underwear bargains in store for you. We have underwear for men of all callings, including some of the best imported makes. All these on sale at prices which are much less than are asked elsewhere for similar qualities. SALE PRICES OF MEN'S WOOL SOCKS Men who from necessity or inclination wear woolen socks will find the very lest values hereall weights, light, medium and heavy, SPKCIAL AT u'jc, 2oc. 35c, 50c. All Wool Oregon Made Blankets Needless to go into lengthy praise of the quality of the Blankets on sale here. When you are told that they are "Oregon Made" and all wool, that's "praise" enough for doesn't "Oregon Made" when applied to Blankets mean all that is good? Prices run down hill like this iust now: $5.00 Double All-Wool Grey Blankets, at $3.75 $0.50 Double All-Wool Mottled Blankets, at $5.00 $8 50 Double All-Wool Mottled Blankets, at $0.00 $8.50 Double Lamb's Wool White Blankets, at $0.00 $10.00 Double Lamb's Wool White Blankets, at $7.50 3 I MM. U BROWNSVILLE WOOLEN . .11 L Mill to Man Clothiers 684 Commercial St., bet. 15th and 16th Ml rnrr 1 1 1 1 1 ti ii in , . . iv vk. nnrrTrnrrnT r- fMMr"-wMi i-t- ar-r . -rrm --mii in mm 1 T""rr,rrrJ ii vrrr A'ilviw..v.1...J, hj..-,...v3M......... 5iSSfe:. .&k?r. SSfaiM - 11 r ..-...TT-...-w..y-..-..i. 1TTWjam.- I . . -V-'- npr WiyavwTT'ritbe' ot dk 'cllin'went to ulccp doorln n thunderstorm and 'learned i!nt be had turnod Into a ipot t1 d.m- nnd wn nhout to b killed f r pork. D tnitclior already bad blm !)- li bind la Ik nnd do water was ready t"s"i:lil ilo brlKilin oIT of 1:1 111 wbon be awnlii- In n cold swwit. It wn Jest Mi!Uult;lit urn! at do sumo mlnlt an owl tioott'd und 11 daK liowlod. Itruddor Itclict' Hturtod fur my limiso on n dead run to nsk mo to explain. In five mlu utvM I tl'Kcred It out tint bo had nun thin' comlu' to blm, uud, lo, only three duyti had piiHHfd when one of his ctill l'oii sot de Iiouho nil re wld a limtdi nml It was buruod to de ground, lkud dor Itehee had about a hundred dollnnt' wutb of furniture. It wua Insured for four hundred and fifty, us plight hiive been expocted from nidi a prudent man n him. lie Kt ebery dollar of It from de Insurance company, and dat'g de reason his fnm'ly am uow wenrlu' din uioiid pins and llbln ou do fat o' de land. "AS TO SIGNS. "As to Rlgns," continued the pre.sl dent, amid most profound stillness, "you havo 'em yore In pfenty and on ( should commit each nnd obery one to memory. ir you see n diuck ent clinsiu' a white duwff ulonir do road nnd doy pass u cock eyed man ns dey ko, dat In n sIku of n hard winter to come. Look around you and locate do nearest wood pile or eon I yard. "If a yaller duwjr bowls at midnight under your winder nnd won't po uwm.y after you havo pelted him wld sticks of wood, but keeps right at It until you go out and threaten to lilt him wld de whole front fence, make up your mind dat a calamity am at hand. You may be nrr'csted befo' you get b:)ine wld do next chicken or wuteruillyou or ouo of do chlU'u 11111 Rwlne to full down do well or off do roof. "If the sun comes up In do muwnlu' like a ball of tire aud de wind mn from de west nnd a humpbacked man passes your cabin wld n bunch of cat nip under bis arm don't leave do house dat day. It am a sign of mad dogs. Sit 011 do doah steps, wld a pile of brickbats beside you, and be prepared todlogamo. "If you sit down In a eauury colored street kyar wld a rod dashboard and find yourself between u elnbfooted wo man and a knock kneed man git right out as soon as possible and befo' de conductor has taken up your fare. To remain dar am to get a hoodoo on yon. "If you am suunterln' out some even- In' and by accident approach a field In which dar am a watermllyon patch squat down by de fence and wait for a sign. song near If a whlppoorwlll breaks Into tar by it's all rlii tari.de bbz- gent iiieioiin diif'pTitcir'niuI'y'uufs. 'If Instead n cricket gives sefen bud chirps don't you git ober dat fence. I; you do tie owner will tire a char;;o ol salt lut i you and let bis bulldog mnk a meal otT'u your lalgs. "If yon hear a tick In' In de wal. while you mn lyln' In bed don't be tvc seconds jjlttln" out o' dat. If you con tlner to lay d'tr mid de ticker cotitluei-: to tick you wj.II be Invltlu' a stroke o paralysis. "If you mn staudlu' at your gate am u red headed white man comes alon;. and offers you half a dollar to drive 11 black cow to a snrtln place turn away from him in scorn. Out cow will kick a fat woman mid git you Into n law suit, mid de white man will beat you outer de price. "If you mn sittln' ou de fence In dc artcrnoon and wlshln' you was rich and three crows fly ober you mid yon bear u horso whinny nt de same time go right off and buy a ticket In a lot tery. You 11 in shore to bit do capital prize and have money t burn for eber after. "lint's all, my friends all until you git de hook. We will uow break de meetln' In two, mid y.ni can gather rouud me nnd pass up your money. If you will persist in bellevin' In dreams and signs, take mine and no other. Pey mn jest as good us anybody's, und my old woman needs do money to buy new goose leathers for de beds uud porous plasters for her lame buck." M. QUAD. MAORI HOSPITALITY. In Time of Peace. In the first months of the Russia' Japan war we had a striking example of the necessity for preparation and the early advantage of those who, so to speak, "have shingled their roofs In dry weather." The virtue of prepara tion has made history and given to us our greatest men. The Individual as well as the nation should be pre pared for any emergency. Are you prepared to succesfully combat the first cold you take? A cold can be treated much more quickly when treated as soon as It has been con trneted and before It has become set tled In the system. Chamberlain' Cough Remedy Is famous for Jts cures of colds and It should be kept at hand ready for Instant use. For sale by Frank Hart, Leading Druggist. . Bigger and Greater bargain than ever to be had at the Great Retiring Sale of C. H. Cooper. Call now be fore it Is too late. 11-1-tf Itrenoonn Welcome Intruded rnrly of Travclrra. A traveler lu New Zealand tells of a native welcome. His party drew near to the central l:o:ne of the tribe of Maoris. "As we rsiol beneath the pv.rnpets ve wers startled by a horri ble yell, and round the corner of t!ir Ftockndo appeared a ferocious tigure, tattooed, red painted, befeathered and naked, except for a very brief waist frlnjre of dangling palm liber. His eyes rolled till the whites only wc.-n seen; then lis thrust or.t a long find snaky tongue and grimaced fearfully. Shaking n wooden spear In his hand, be swiftly cast it nt us, then turned uud rushed toward the village. Jus! as the Fpearsnian turned one of o:ir young men who had rapidly divested himself of nil but his waist slnwl darted out in pursuit, and we followed nt a more dlguilied pace. The entrance to the village was barred by a body of armed men, crouching still as death. ou one knee, each holding a gun, butt on the ground, barrel sloping toward us. We advanced until we were with in twenty paces of the warriors. Then all at once, at a wild cry from a cliief on the right, they jumped to their feet. leaped high In the air, with their feet doubled under them like deer, and with one voice literally barked out a thun dering chorus. This way und that our martial hosts bounded, brandishing their loaded rifles iu time to the chant. Halting abruptly, with an earth shak ing thud, they tired a volley of ball cartridge over our heads. "Another volley reverberated from bill to hill and the bullets whistled over us. luen the brown warriors fell back and n gayly dressed baud of women, with green leaves wreathed about their brows nnd waving shawls aud leafy boughs, advanced with a gliding semi dance nnd chanted their ancient wel come song. When the women's song ceased out to the front danced six girls n group of vividly barbaric, yet not inharmonious, color appareled In loose crimson roundabouts and short gowns of gorgeously flowered print, their brows bound about with red handker chiefs, which held lu place the black and white plumes of the rare bula bird and the Iridescent feathers of the long tailed cuckoo, their cheeks dabbed with ; an at once tbe' enant eudeVrSnTin un expected high note and the performers stopped, breathless and glowing all over with their self evolved emotions. Bipnd flax mats were spread out for us on the green and after speeches of greeting we were regaled with pork, preserved birds, wild honey and pota toes, in quantity sufficient to have sat isfied a starving garrison." Chicaso News. PAINFUL 1 HANDS Jnmt Haw tn Tin I. Advance to the inner door and give! three distinct raps. The "devil" will attend your alarm. You give him your name, postomce address and the nura ber of years that you are owing for the paper. He will then admit you You will advance to the center of the room, address the editor with the fol lowing countersign: Extend the right hand about two feet from the body, with the thumb and index finger clasp ing a ten dollar bill, which drops Into the extended band of the editor, at the same time saying, "Were you looking for me?" The editor will say, "You bet." After giving him the news you will be obliged to retire with a receipt for the obligation properly discharged. Kingman (Kan.) Leader-Courier. Billiards at Sea. "Can you Imagine playing billiards In a heavy gale?" said the captain. "Do you wonder that our great liners, with their elevators and telephones ami gymnasium, don't have billiard tables as well? One ship once had a billiard table, the Great Eastern. The wonderful Great Eastern bad a billiard table on a swinging deck. This deck was supposed to counteract the ship's motion and to keep the table steady, but it failed to do' so, and very re markable were some of the shots made on the Great Eastern's table in rough j weather. Nevertheless the able was kept for years and was a popular insti tution aboard the big boat, but no oth er boat before or since has ever both ered to Introduce billiards." . Suffered for a Long Time Without Relief Had Three Doctors and Derived No Benefit One Doctor Was Afraid to Touch Them Soreness Disappeared and Hands Now Smooth After Application of CUTICURA SOAP AND CUTICURA OINTMENT Money Made No Difference. A poor but worthy old couple had a rare stroke of luck. Some relative died and left them a fortune of 20. The night of the arrival of the lawyer's let ter telling them of their good fortune they sat up late, discussing the future and what thov wppb to dn with the red ocner paint, greenstone pendants great BUm they ha(1 inherited. When aud shark's teeth hanging from their; they had done and were rising to go to cars- bed the old man said, with a grand air "These barefooted nymphs, hands out 0( magnanimity: "Weel, I suppose, hips and heads thrown back, glided J janet, this'll mak' nae difference. We'll into the measure of a danee to thej jU8t Bpeak to the neebours as before." music of a shrill monody chanted by London Standard. . a white haired, tattooed old lady, Then ' "For a long time I suffered with sores on the hands which were itching, painful, and disagreeable. I had three doctors and derived no benefit from any of them. One doctor said he was afraid to touch my hands, so you must know how bad they were; an other said I never could be cured; and the third said the sores were caused by the dipping of my hands in water in the dye-house where I work. I saw in the papers about the wonderful cures of the Cuticura Remedies and procured some of the Cuticura Soap and Cuticura Ointment. In three days after the application of the Cuticura Ointment my hands began to peel and were better. The sore ness disappeared, and they are now smooth and clean, and I am still working in the dye-house. "I strongly recommend Cuticura Soap and Cuticura Ointment to any one with sore hands, and I hope that this letter will be the means of help ing other sufferers. Very tridy yours, Mrs. A. E. Maurer, 2340 State St., Chicago, 111., July 1, 1905." MOTHERS!' MOTHERS! To know that a warm bath with Cuticura Soap and a single anointing with Cuticura, the great Skin Cure, and purest and sweetest of emollients, will afford instant relief and refreshing sleep to skin-tortured babies, and rest for tired and worn-out mothers. Sold throughout th world. Cuticurk Soap, 25c., Oint ment, 5Uc., Kolvent,fi0c. (In form of Chocolate Ctttod Till!, tie. per vUl of IM). Putter Drug Chtui. Corp., Sol Propi., Burton, Mane. M-Malled Free, " Uow to Cure Ecsenu" and "All About Ike gain, Hoalp, Hair, and Uaudi." Need a good cathartic? A pill is best Say a pill like DeWitfs Little Early Risers. About the most reliable on the market. Sold by Chas. Rogers, Druggist.