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About The morning Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1899-1930 | View Entire Issue (Oct. 26, 1906)
FRIDAY, OCTOBER so, joofl. iTIIE MORNING ASTORIAN, ASTORIA, OREGON. )0000000000000 - AN EPIDEMIC Martha McCulioch-WIUUma Copyrliclit, luufl. Iijr 0. II. BuUillff 0000000000000 "I have my opinion," Mm. March aid Impressively, "of folk that don't know no raoro'u to iflvo a candy pull. You don't o to It, Louisa; not odd tup. I've brought you op genteel and genteel you've got to Htny while you tay with nio and your pa." . "Il'mpJ That's likely to be always, the didoes you cut up," her spinster Utcr-ln-mw, Mima Mary-Bet, sniffed. -"Patience, known, if bad a girl like Loulxn, comln' on tweuty-one, ami four mora a crowtlln' Iter, I'd bo glad and thankful of any chance to allow her off. Ami I'd Ilko to lmvo you toll mo what tiM la against candy, pull? Door know, I'vo aeon botter'n you at 'am aud bavin' a mighty good time." 4 Mlaa Mary-Bet had "means;" banco ber outupmiklug. " Squire March bad charged liU wlfo never to arguo with Iter. Then-fore that lady contented herself with a wild retort. H "I can't say aa It's real alnful, un less they uieau to have play In' after ward. And 1 hopo you don't think I bold wltli them klaatu' gamea." "I don't know but you'd better," Mlaa Mjiry-lhit sld rumlnatlvely. "I ay let Loulr. go, and Mary -Bet and Bally too." "My! That would be team of Marchea," Mra. March aald, drawing down the comer of ber mouth, Mlaa Mil ry But got up decisively. "There's goln' to be four Marchea," ho announced. "I'm goln' myself. I know the Pet erne would 'a' aiked me If they hadn't thought It waant wuth while. Aud I'm goln' to take iny nlecoa and buy 'era a new frock and rib bon and shoes. Don't you aay a word, Ilnnnnht Ono old maid In the family la morVn enough," Mra. March gasped; alio waa past peech. Mlaa Mary-Bet waa commonly ao cloxo with her money ber present lltx-ml mind waa In the nature of a miracle. Hut If alio repented It aho held fniit to her word and trotted off a week later to tho Petcmcs In the high est possible rent ber. Louisa waa gorgeous In a plaid frock green, blue and purple; Mary-Bet Junior sported n ambit delnlne, and little Bally, a yellow haired fairy who I OS VtXt MINUTB HB MEABUBKD HIS LENOTll OH TUB CARPET. looked like a changeling among her high colored brunette slstors, waa In robin egg with little reliefs of white. Mlaa Mary-Hot herself waa a picture of elegance In n span now black allk. Mrs. Mifrch declared It waa tempting providence to wear auch a thing where molasses candy was ao to abound, but Miss Mury-Uet had only tossed her head and marched off with It some thing blghor than usual. She wus rising forty, also fat and fair. Her sharp touguo and masterful " ways had kept men rather In awe of her. Now that youth waa post aho began to see that the world wagged mainly for married folk, so she had mado up her mind to marry off her nieces wit of hand In spite of their mother. Loulza was not much of a problem. She was ao kindly and sweet spirited, withal so much a born economist, at least threo personable widowers were thought to bo on tenterhooks about her, each waiting tho lucky chance that would let lilin speak his wish. All of them would bo at the candy pull, and each should have his chance. "MIhs Mary-Bet had cautioned Lou lza not to bo precipitate. "Dou't lot any man have it to throw up to you that you couldn't got anybody olso," , she had raid. "You Jest listen t: till of 'em and say you gottor lmvo tlmo to mako up your mind. Then yon can take your pick. Shucks, doutrtl p.:o you won't get It! You'd 'a' bo;m v.v.r rled long ago if your m:t'd luil .tho sense of a goose. She's kept vr.i tied right to her apron string and nov?r let anybody namo courtln' that she v.T.un'l right there to stop the wholo thins" Mary-Bet junior was a handful eve; without the rod frock. Her goilmothm was none too fond of her they were too . nearly off the samo piece. Tlx J moat ellglblo of tho widowers bad shown aymptotna of wavering when tr be found hlmaclf In Mary-Bet Junior's vicinage ha waa under thirty. If Loulxa bad the bad taste to pre fer one of the others, Mlaa Mary-Bet reflected, tho wandering and waver ing might be turned to account Henry May could hardly be called real widower be bad but married bla weetheart on her deathbed for the privilege of soothing ber last fevered Lours. That Kaa Ore years back, so lie had been wonderfully constant It was only this Inst year that be bad been aeon anywhere but at church. Bully'a blue eyea were still those of child t least to tho casual glance, Looking to their depths, there was eoruethlng more. ' Sally bad light, email foot aud moved like thlatlodown In summer alra. When the playing began she was the star. 8he bad not ahono In the candy pulling; it waa bard work, and, besides, alio bated ber pulling partner, Handy Rolerts, It made lot almost sick' to touch bands with him In tho folding of their candy kelu. Afu-r the first time abo bad let go the randy,-thereby fivhsj; Sandy fall or ao. Ite meant to get even with ber In the playing by chooslug ber out of tho very first ring and kissing ber not once, but many times. roaalbly Bally suspected aa much, Certainly abe fought ahy of any ring where be atood up. Since bo waa a one alnger and a ready leader, that cut ber oat of many things, but abe did not very much mind. Sitae Venn, the oldest and ataldeat of the widowers, aomohow took her under his protection and aaw to It that abe waa not lone some, Mlaa Mary-Bet chuckled to see It "Thinks he's aamo aa in the family and beln' good to little 81s." abe said to herself, adding after a breath, "but unless I. miss my guess, be'a goln' to got the aack. Loulza looks like she plum' wroppod up In John Trotter; bo's been telllu' ber all about tho clr cuaea be'a went to ever slnco the call come to pull candy." ' -Evidently John was much flattered Ho talked on and on through "Swing Old Llaa," through "Mister Bluster," through "Onta, Teas, Beane and Bar ley" and to the beginnings of "Snap." "Snap" forbids conversation, albeit it la deetltuto of singing. Loulza was beautiful runner, a awlft aud sure catcher. What need to add that abe waa futbleaaly enapped on to the floor almost aa soon aa ever aho eat down? Sandy Roberts, In especial, got her out whenever he could, and since be waa tho life of the game that waa very often. But when, In tho course of play, abo became part of the etump, he thought It would bo great sport to get himself Irregularly the pursuer of Sal ly. He caught ber, of course, although abe mado bun pant for It and would not let ber go until ho had given ber a resounding smack. ' The nest minute bo measured his luugth on the rag cat pet Sllna Venn's fist had sent him there, and Silas himself stood over bim with eyes Hint snld plainly, "Come out eldo and settle It." Then something happened; something to talk about for at least a generation. Loulza, tho meek and mild, the gentlest creature living, Hew at Silas In a rage, shook bim hard and whirled hltu aside, then BtwDid over the oroBtrato Sandy. 70MEN'SNEGLECT 8UFFERIHGTHESUBEPEHALTY Health Thus Lost Is Restored by Lydia B. Plnkham's vegetable Compound. Bow many women do you know who are perfectly well and strong? We bear every day the aame atory over and over again. ' I do not feel well I am ao tired all the tlmel" More than likely you apeak the aame words yourself, aud no doubt you feel far from well. The cause may be easily traced to some derangement of the fe male organa which manifests itself in depression of spirits, reluctance to go anywhere or do anything, backache, bearing-down pains, flatulency, nerv ousness, sleeplessness, or . other feCj mate weakness. These symptoms are but warnings that there is clanger ahead, and unless heeded a life of suffering or a serious operation is the Inevitable result. The never-failingremedy for all these symptoms ia Lydia B. Plnkham'e Veg etable Compound. Mlsa Eate MoDonald of Woodbrldge, N. J., wrltea : Dear Mrs. Pinkham! " Restored health has meant so much to me that I cannot help from telling about it for the take of other suffering women. " For a long time I suffered untold agony with female trouble and irregularities, which made me a physical wreck, and no one thought I would recover, but Lydia E. Pink barn's Vegetabla Compound has entirely cured me, and made me well and strong, and I feel it my duty to tell other suffering women what a splendid medicine it is." For twenty-five years Mra. Pinkham. daughter-in-law of Lydia E. Pinkham, has under her direction, and since her dooease, been advising sick women free of charge. Her advice is .free and always helpful, Address, Lynn, Mass. I Miss KateMDonald half sbbblng: "If-lf beHurt'you,'7-J; kill blml (lot up, Sandy, darlln', 1 don't care who know now." Sandy rose to bis feet to the occasion, "There's a mix got to be straightened up, folks," be said, catching tight bold of Loulza's hand. "We're goln' to mar ry next week, if wo bave to run away. I've been woltin and waltln' till aho said I might tell the old folks. They don't like me, but they'll bave to lump me." "Sandy, I beg youn, pardon! Sbnkel I thought you were after somebody else," Silas Venn said Joyously, edging to Sally's aide. "I'm goln to apeak out too," alio said. "If Sally won't have me I'll stay a lone widower till the end o my days. How Is it, llttlo gair , ' "Humph! Look at ber face. Sbe'a been levin' you since she saw you cry so at your wlfe'a buryln," Mary-Bet Junior, tho Irrepressible, broke in. "And I ain't ashamed to ssy I've loved Hen ry Just ss long. He-he's Just now found It out But it's all comln' right"- .,- ;'.- "Except for me," John Trotter Inter rupted, crestfallen, , John waa thirty-seven, if be did ad mit to only thirty-three. He bad, more over, a flock of girl children. That waa why Loulza bud been aet down ao much' bla special benefaction, He look ed speculatively at Miss Mary-Bet. After all, she didn't show the five years between them. , "I wonder If you'd look at a fellow my size and ahape," be murmured un der breath. Miss Mary-Bet shook ber bead at bim, but aald In bis own key: "It must be marryin' Is catcbln', aame as measles. Come, and lei's talk it' over some other time." Want la on Abraufct This question Is answered In a most Interesting manner by George Leland Hunter In an article entitled "The Trujh About 'Doctored' Bugs" in Coun try Life In America. He writes: "Abrasli Is a most interesting word. In Persia If father, son and grand son have Roman noses, then a Roman nose 1 the abrasb of that family. If gluttony Is characteristic of genera tion after generation, then' la gluttony tho hereditary nbrash. If It hi a strawberry mark on the left shoulder, then tho strawberry mark Is an abrash. The abraxhes of a rug are the stripe or bands that run, parallel or entirely across the pile. Wbeu seen for the first time by Americans accustomed to admire and Insist on the deathlike uni formity that characterizes machine products ahrashes are apt to Impress them as defects, particularly If wide. It takes experience and acquaintance with the art Industries to grasp com pletely the significance and artistic fame of Individuality." Going to Lnaeheon. How a man goes: Glances at the clock, drops his pen. Jumps from his chair, grabs bis hat bolts for the door, says briefly, "Going to lunch," and Is gone. Time, one-half minute. How a woman goes: Glances at the clock. Wipes ber pen carefully and places It In the pen tray. Arranges pa per neatly on ber desk. Goes to the mirror. Remeves four or five combs, as many pins and possibly unties a bow from her balr. Combs up her pompadour, puffs out the sides, combs up the scolding locks, replaces bow, plus and combs, then surveys result with hand mirror. Washes ber bands and cleans her nails. Dabs the pow der rag over her face to remove "that shiny look." Applies whisk broom to dress. Puts on hat and thrusts Into it flvo long hatpins. Consults band mir ror again. Puts on veil. Uses hand mirror once more. Investigates sun dry fancy pins at back of neck and belt Pulls on gloves. Gets her para so). Gives one more look in the mlrroi and goes. Time depends on the worn an and the length of her gloves, but anywhere from twenty minutes to hall an hour. New York Press. Old English Coal Record. There is a record, dated 852, of the receipt of twelve cartloads of fossil coal at the abbey of Peterborough, and this was assuredly not the first case ol production and delivery. Tho deeds of the bishopric of Dur ham contain records of grants of land to colliers as far back as 1180 In va rlous parts of tho county. In the yeai 1230 a charter was granted by Henry III. to the freemen of Newcnstle-on Tyne to dig coal in the fields belong lug to the castle, and It was in or about this yeac that coal was first sent to London. Very early in tho fourteenth century evidence abounds of a large consumption of coal by smiths, brewers and others. Already the sraoko nul sanco appeared, and a commission ol Ed.ward. I- l&Ylod,flnesJojeyent it A Wedding- Invitation. Mr. Slack regrets that he Must impart the information That he can't accept with glee Mrs. White's kind Invitation. Candidly he must avow, Risking being thought unpleasant That his means do not allow I Of the purchase of a present. Mr. Black, too, would remind Mrs. White, without evasion, That they've met, through fate unkind, Only upon one occlusion, As for the prospective bride, Her no doubt delightful daughter, If her form he'd ever eyed Something he perhaps had brought i her. Mr. Black must, therefore, stated Taking all things In conjunction. That he can't participate In this fashionable function. ' , He is neither millionaire Nor a dog inclined to mangers; He's just on who cannot spare Charities for perfect strangers. 1 London TrlMiS Breezu Paragraphs' From the Kicker A Political Discussion That Came Near Ending In Murder. Copyright UOi, by Eugene Parcells.J H R. JIM HELLSO (who la our- mself; wishes the Kicker to deny in the most vigorous language that he is thinking of resigning his position as postmaster of this gulch. He dies now and then, but be never resigns. Mr. Jim ncltso (who Is ourself) paid a abort visit to Denver last week and did not blow out the gas. Mr. Jim Uellso (wbo la ourself) blew down the barrel of a new shotgun on exhibition at Kramer's the other day. It wasn't loaded. i ., Mr. Jim Uellso (who is ourself) in forms us that alterations and Improve ments to the Hellno Opera House will cost 12,000. One hundred pounds of lead waa dug out of the celling last week,': Mr. Jim Uellso (wbo Is ourself) baa asked the Kicker to deny In thunder ous tones that be contemplates organ ising a wild west show and taking the road next summer in opposition to Buffalo William. His show baa been right here In Glveadam Gulcb for the last eight years. It is quite true that the editor of the Kicker and the governor of the territory met at Florence the other day and bad a long and confidential talk, bnt there la not a grain of truth In the statement that they played poker for ten hours on a stretch and that the result was bad for the gov ernor. We and the governor were on our dignity all the time. Had be sug gested poker we should bave discour aged the Idea. Colonel Joe Skelly of the Big 4 ranch Informs us that be felt and counted ninety-eight distinct shocks of an earthquake last Sunday. We have not the slightest hesitation In pronouncing Colonel Joe a liar. If be was sober enough 'to feel or hear anything t was one of bis old mules rolling on the grass. Edward Jones and Peter Howard, both of this town, met on the street last Sunday and resumed- a political discussion, with the result that guns were drawn and ten shots fired. No one waa killed, no one wounded. The TEN SHOTS FIBED. men stood and looked at each other In astonishment for a moment after the firing and then each ran in the opposite direction. Oh, yes; Arizona will be ad mitted to the Union, when the robins nest again! There Is neither law nor ordinance In this whole territory against speed ing automobiles. They can skip along at a rate of 100 miles an hour. On the contrary, there Is no law against any citizen taking a pop at a chauf feur with his gun if he feels so maid ed, and he Is pretty sure to feel that way. If you own an auto and arc looking for a paradise, come this way and get a free burial. A Chicago man who was looking for real estate In this locality went over to Lone Jack the other day to buy a large block of town lots. On visiting the graveyard be found that only twenty-one people had died In three years. He did not buy. He realized that a town that couldn't do better than that was a slow town and had no future. We understand that certain mem bers of the only church choir In Glve adam Gulch object, to our. leading the singing because we play poker, own a race horse and a fighting dog and take a nip with the boys occasionally. We don't suppose It Is exactly accord ing to the eternal, fitness of things, but until society bus safely passed through the chaotic state and can stand alone we shall stick to our Binging job and back It up with two guns. Meanwhile we shall slug with ardor and with as much reverence as we can. At the last meeting of the common council Alderman Adams offered a reso- njhat the name Glveadam Gulch be changed to Crescent City. Such names as Roost High. Last Stou, Angel's APPEARANCES Often a person is sized up by his appear ance; by the tone that surrounds him. And more often a business house is sized up by the stationary it uses. A cheap letter head or a poor bill head gives a mighty poor first impression and makes business harder to transact. Good printing costs no more than poor printing. The first im pression is half the battle in business . You wouldn't employ a "sloppy" sales man; why put up with "sloppy" station ery, that gives a wrong impression of the importance, of your , business. Let us do your printing and help you to make that ten strike. . , ' . . The J. S. DellingerCo. ASTORIA IRON WORKS JOHNi FOX, Pres. F L BISHOP. Secretary Designers and Manufacturers of THE LATEdT IMPROVED Canning Machinery, .Marine Engines and Boilers Complete Cannery Outfits FurnisfbJ. CORRESPONDENCE 'SOLICITED SCOW BAY IRON & B RASS WORKS ASTORIA, OREGON IRON AND BRASS FOUNDERS LAND AND MARINE EKCiNEERS Cp-to-Eate SawMIU Machinery Prompt atteDtionrglTenJal. repair vork 18th;and Franklin Ave. Tel. Main 2451 00 CENTS PER MONTH Wl-e 9Jtot!'HHCj Guarantees to its Advertisers A Larger Circulation Than Any Paper Published In Astoria OUR BOOKS ARE OPEN TO INSPECTION BY OUR ADVERTISERS Rest arid Hell Bent were" 'substituted, but all were voted down, and the al derman finally withdrew his motion. Glveadam Gulch It was and always wlll.be. There Is nothing euphonious or lingering about the names Denver, Omaha, Buffalo, New York, Boston, Baltimore and Philadelphia, but when you come to Glveadam Gulch you pause and think and remember. The editor of the Utah Weekly Moni tor, wishlug to emulate us and become famous at Teheran and other places, drew a gun ou a stranger the other day and made arrangements to start a private graveyard. His machinery skipped a cog, however. He received two bullets in the body, and the doctor says he may not pull through. . The Imitator seldom succeeds. The Blue Hills Banner calls us the Caesar of Arizona. Thanks Yo have seized about everything In sight that promised to he n good thing, and have let go of nothing. We started out to take car of ourself. and tho editors now in tho porhouse needn't walk down to the gate to look for our com ing. M. QUAD. ASTORIA, OREGON Nelson Troytr, Vice-Pres. snd Snpt. ASTORIA SAVINGS BANK, Treaa Foot of Fourth Bfaeet. ASTORIA'S BEST NEWSPAPER Wounds, Bruises and Burns. By applying an antiseptio dressing to wounds, bruises, burns and like in uries before inflammation sets In, they may be healed without matura tion and in about one-third the time required by the old treatment. This is the greatest discover? and triumph of modern Burgery. Chamberlain's Pain Balm acts cn this same principle. It is an anti-septio and when applied to such injuries, causes them to heal very quickly. It also allays the pain and soreness, and prevents any danger of blood poisoning. 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