FRIDAY, AUGUST 18, 1905.
HIE MORNING ASTORIAN. AbTOMA,OHE.1
THE MORNING ASTORIAN
Established 1873.
Published Daily by
HE 1. S. DELLINGER COMPANY.
SUBSCRIPTION RATES.
By mail, per year 00
By mail, per month 00
hy carrier, per month 5
WEEKLY ASTORIAN.
1 'nail, per year, tn advance ..SI 0
Entered as second-class matter JunXfl,
1SW, at the posUiffice at Astoria. Or son,
under the act of Coujrres of March S, 1?7.
- HrOrcVr for the deUwiiMr of Th Morxisq
ArroMAX to ilw rwidwoe or pb of buwiw
M p made by pom) card or through trte
rhtwe. Any IrrwfcuUrily to iMlwy should b
buaediately reported to the offlc of publication.
Telephone Main M1.
C. M. Schwab is going to Europe to
learn shipbuilding. In view of the mess
be made of the shipbuilding trust he
needs the schooling. Perhaps he'll be
gin by "Sohwab-bing" down the decks.
The report that the Hon. Hinky Dink,
touring Europe as the fit type and rep
resentative of the Chicago council, has
disguised himself is denounced as a base
canard. He only took off his horse
blanket weskit because of the heat.
Now another sensational autoit is
rlaid up for repairs. The speed bacillus
seems to- have emulated the historic
worm and to have turned. When these
experts cannot run machines safely what
can be expected of mere amateurs?
The head of the greatest life insur
an company in England one against
which no word of scandal has ever been
breathed is paid only 2-3,000 a year
salary. Comment? What's the use.
tJcary law to its utmost. It may, "(
cuiuxe, seem a little unjust that the
riiim!u trailA tw to California rather
than to Oregon and Washington, or that
it is not more equally divided between
the three commonwealth. However, the
bulk of the trade goes to Valifoiniu and
o far as we can oca it will continue to
go to the Golden state. The annual
trade with China aggregate approxi
mately $100.0t,000. We greatly de
plore that Oregon does not ahar this
trade with California. Yet we realize
that our glorious ftate is not o fortu
nate, aud do not countenance an ad
vocacy which can only reult,in jwpartl
king the interests of our very shh1
neighW on the south. While California
merchants have, convened and recom
mended that congress make om modi
fications in tlie exclusion law to jx-rmit
bona tide nierehants and students enter
ing this country with the assurance
that they will be free from molestation.
Californuuw have never at any time
suggested that the coolies lie permitted
to come here, to enforce the exclusion
laws without some change means that
the boycott will thrive, that hundreds
of agencies, representing the fabulous
investments of Californians in China
will hava to suspend operation and
that the nation will retrograde com
mercially to the extent of $100,000,000
a year. Let Governor Chamberlain and,
in fact the people of Oregon ,bear in
mind that when the Lewi and Clark
exposition was nothing more than a
Urge sized country fair and promised
to be an utter failure, California was
the first fcta'te to come to Oregon's aid
and appropriated $!H),000 for participa
tion. in the Centennial; that the Cali
fornia promotion committee sent sev
eral buudred of California's representa
tive merchants to the fair as a further
manifestation of good will and that
Oregonians onV the rostrum in Festival
hall, at the exposition, in the presence
of the members of the promotion com
mittee, spoke enthusiastically over the
the closer relationship of not only Cali
fornia and Oregon, but of California
and the whole of the Pacific Northwest
and cherished a desire for mutual ef
fort that would result in a greater Pa
cific coast. There is only one decent
thins to do assist California to the
best of our ability in preserving this
trade with China.
In the good old days of the Buckeye
Serenaders and the Christy Minstrels,
audiences always laughed when the
pompous interlocutor asked: "Xow,
Br'r Bones, can you tVd me what river
runs froo Philadelphia ?" and when
Bones replied: "You're mistaken, sah!
Nuffin rumvnbo- Philadelphia." The
minstrel stage lias undergone a great
change since then. .The interlocutor,
"bones," the impossible plantation negro
and the singer of sentimental slavery
day songs have made room for a new
class of comedians, but the Philadelphia
joke is still doing service. Its day has
come, however, if the reports from that
city may" lie relied upon. A -patrol
wagon, so the btory goes, was recentlx
called to take a man who had dislocated
his shoulder to the hospital.' The horses
were driven so quickly and the- injured
man was bumped and shaken to
such an extent that the dislocated
bones were brought into their normal
positions and the man arrived at the
Loepital considerably ruffled up but re
quiring no surgical aid. The unusual
treatment will hardly become popular
and will not take the place of methods
now in vogue, even in Philadelphia,
Where the remarkable cure was effected,
but it knocks the props from under a
shopworn joke which for years has had
no foot to stand upon. Something does
run in Philadelphia.
When a dahk mauV lookiu' fcr a
bundle; v
But come a time of settlement you're
nigh unto that date,
For do duhk man' lookiu' fer a
bundles
Of course tn pony up to hfm will not
be very nice,
But better make your mind up ere he
ask you more than twice,
For every time he queries, he just add
unto de price!
Pay de dahk man lookiu fcr a
bundle! -W.lt. C.
A LATER DESD0M0NA. i
I Vaped the springe of Kosamondj
Somehow contrived to miss
The lure of Nell, and nimbly shunned
The.net of Coralys;
From Mabel I made shift to fly,
Averting utter route;
And timeously did fortify,
When Philippa came out.
Use breeds a habit, says the bard
Againt the charm of Bess,
I've steeled a heart, already hard.
With flattering success;
And yet, the less I yield, the more
Her smile are on me cast;
I think that she must love me for
The dangers I have passed.
-Puck.
A Touching Story
Is the saving from death of the baby
girl of Geo. A. Eyler, Cumberland, Md.
He writes: "At the age of 11 months,
our little girl wa in declining health.
with serious throat trouble, and two
physicians gave her tip. We were al
most in despair, when we resolved to
try Dr. King New Discovery for Con
sumption, Coughs and Colds. The first
bottle gave relief. After taking four
bottles she was cured, and is now In
perfect health." Never fails to relieve
and cure a cough or cold. At Cha.
Rogers' drug store. 50c and $1 guar
anteed. Trial bottle free.
Iff LIGHTER VEIN
Governor Chamberlain in an address
before t!ie Trans-Mississippi congress at
Portland Wednesday declared himself as
bitterly opjiosed to the modification of
tle Chinese exclusion laws saying that
the "influx of a horde of Chinese coolies
into the Pacific coat was too high a
price to pay for the trade some of our
Pacific cw-t merchants are at present
enjoying with the Asiatic country." To
gether with the tenor of the dispatches
reporting 'the meeting which speak of
Governor Pardee as referring "laconical
ly" to the question of exclusion it is
apparent that the states of the Pacific
Northwest are allied against their
neighbor on the south, California. Why,
puch an attitude is assumed we are at
loss to understand, unlfe. the executives
of Washington and Oregon are prejudiced
because tly-ir commonwealths do not
enjoy more than a small share of the
Asiatic trade. The coolies have no place
in the preent discussion of Chinese
immigration. Of all the states in the
American l"iiion( there is none so bit-
terly opposed to the introduction 'of
Chinese coolie labor-as California. The
Jeary exclusion act was conceived in
California and it was largely due to
Californians that the enforcement of
the exclusion laws was so rigid. Cali
lornia has had more than its share of
Chinese labor and invariably has taken
the initiative in efforts to pu&U the
HIS SENSITIVE POINT.
Leader of School Lttle Fishes
Come on, fellers, let's go and jolly the
old octopus.
New Little Fish That'll lie fun. How
do you do it?
Leader of School of Little Fishes
Oh, we all get around him and point
our fins at him, and yell "Trust!" t
makes him crazv. Smart Set.
EXPLOSIVE JOKE.
They were drilling at the, safe. Said
the first cracksman to his pal:
"Wot's de- difference, Bill, between us
an' de hayseed farmer!"
"Dunaj," replied his partner.
"W'y, he tills de land an' we land de
till."
At this point the safe blew up.
Judge.
CREEPING BRANCHES. '
"Wonderful foliage clown here," sa'id
the, man as he loked off across the
barren Arizona desert.
I could see nothing in sight but sand
and eight little pickaninnies crawling
in it at play. I asked him what he
meant.
"I was referring," he replied as he
pointed to the pickaninnies, "to those
Virginia creepers." Judge.
Comforts the beart, strengthens the
mind. Is good ill or well Makes the
face bright as the summer morn. That's
what Hollistcr'a Rocky Mountain Tea
will do. Cures when all else fail. 33
cents at Frank Hart'a drug store.
BehnRe-WalKer
Business College
If you are thinking of attending bu
inesB college you can not afford to ig
nore the best In the northwest,, Our
equipment is unsurpassed west of Chi
cago. On account of our rapidly inrreas
ing attendance
WE WILL MOVE
October First to 'our elegant new quar
ters in the
Elks Building
now being completed at Seventh and
Stark streets. Our graduates are all
employed. Placed 207 pupils in lucra
tive positions during the past year.
Send for our handsomely illustrated
catalogue. Free. Address all communi
cations to our present quarter in the
Stearns Building, Portland.
DR. CHARLES
FLESH FOOD
1 iiraiii m
Forth Form ana) Complexion
Km Imi Ka.f;ti7 fi I "!
wk.r.rr ttDlla H I Uatantty etarb4
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REMOVING WMNKUtt
aatf by auntie, mm appneat Im aftea ahowtat
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I. Chart Push rood U alttvr tk
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For Dovotoptni tko Boat
r Ha MffMMitt attfcj law kat
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SOLD BY OVaJLTatMTBTOMM ARB
DIUOOMTO.
Itawlar ria, 11 CO a baa. tort to alt wkol
tak aStai of this WrXClAl OFM
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koatavia plaia rrapat
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DR. CHARLES CO. TOW
1
Tb
Smith Premier
is the simplest and strong
est of all writing machines.
It does better work, does
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Let M lend you our fittl book telling
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The Smith Premier
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24? Stark St., Poitiuuu Or,
TO A CHUNK OF ICE.
Sparkle, sparkle, little chunk,
In the summer sTiine
What a thrill of joy you bring
To this heart of mine!
W10 would think, oh, little chunk,
Melting on the mat,
It was cold enough to freeze
You as hard as that!
Detroit Tribuncf,
LOOKUP FEB A BUNDLE 1
Have a care, good Mr. Witte, as at
mouth you sojourn
Dar's a dahk man lokin' fer a bundle!
And for that package heavy, why, his
fingers fairly yearn
He's a dahk man lookin' fer a bundle!
For long he's fought a goodly fight, and
kept you on the run;
It hasn't been a sinecure; it wasn't any
fun;
Yet all the while the little man Las
stayed behind the gun
Xow, de dahk man's lookin' fer a
bundle! ,
)
A bluff will hold 'em for'a while, and
sometimes carry weight,
Given Away Free
to
Everybody
Them All
Oar Beautiful
American Talking Machine
Free to Everybody ,
Purchasing our
Teas Coffees Spices
China
Crockery Glassware
Greatest Offer of the Age
CUp this Coupon out, bring
it to any of our ctorea.
Its value la
$5.00 worth of Coupon
toward getting you the
Talking Machine Free
Boys, Girls, and Young Ladles
this is Tour Chance -Come
and See V
Great Amcricaa Importlni Tea Co.
StorM EYtrywhare
571 Commercial Ktreet,r Astoria.
K
San Francisro's leading con
venience a.'iJ family hutel
centrally localeJ. Con
venier.t to a'J car lines, and
places of amusement and in
terest. Cafe and Grill at
tached. Rates $ l.CO per day
nd up. Street cars direct to
hotel Horn and to all depots,
HOUSE
San Francisco, Cat.
CHOCOLATE
SETS
in dainty designs
from $3.75 up.
Just the thing for
a Present.
Yokohama Bazar
628 Commercial Street, Atorl
The
Astoria i.
Restaurant.
I' you want a gool, clean meal or if you
are in a hurry you should
. k go to the
'Astoria, Restaurant
This line, restaurant .i thoroughly up-to.
date-in every detail.
EXCELLENT MEALS.
EXCELLENT SERVICll
ASTORIA IRON WORKS
JOHN FOX, Trrs. and Snyt.
F L DISUol. Secretary
A. I,. FOX, Vlre Pres. I h -
AHTU1UA SAVINGS BANK,Treas
Designers and Manufacturers of
t THE LATEST IMHIOVED ; ; if
Canning Machinery, Marine Engines and Boilers,
Complete Cannery Outfits Furrmhed.
correspondence; solicited.
Foot of Fourth Htrret.
PRAEL 0 EIGNER TRANSFER COsi
Telephone 221.
D RAYING 0 EXPRESSING
LIVERY STABLE
AllBoodaehlpid toourearawill receive ipeclal attention.'
709-715 Commercial Street.
-T9
The MORNING ASTORIAN
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BENTON'S NEW VALVELESS
GASOLINE MARINE ENGINE.
Simple and Reliable. Latest Cut.
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THORNBURG
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Hir.en 1 to 10 II. P., Hlnirl I jlltuler. KNAPPT0N,
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FOUR CYLINDERS TO ORDER TO fOOi'HORSE POWER.
THE ILLINOIS CENTRAL.
Maintains unexcelled at-rvlce from th'.
west to the east and south. Making
close connections wlih train of all
tranMcontlnental lines, passengers are
given their choice of routes to Chicago,
Louisville, Memphis and New Orleans,
and through these points to the far
east.
Prospective travelers desiring Infor
mation us to the lowest rat's and best
routes are invited to correnpond with
the following representatives:
B. H. TRUMBULL, Commercial Agent
142 Third St., Portland, Ore.
'or Kidnev
uiaaaer
troubles.
Cures in
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URINARY
DISCHARGES
bears thnm-l0
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Study the Map
Thirteen states and territories of th Middle
West are traversed by Rock Island lines. There
are more cities of 25,000 population and upwards
on the Rock Island System than on any other
Wtsttrn'roadt From Minnesota to Texas, from
the Rocky Mountains to the Great Lakes, it is
Rock Island country. The Rock Island System
occupies a strategic position in the western
railway world.
Going somewhere ? Get a Rock Island folder
and study the map ten to one your destination
is on the Rock Island or reached by way of it.
Note our several offices maintained in the
Northwest:
- Portland, Seattle, Spokane,
Butte and Salt Lake City.
The Rock Island is reaching out for busl-
, . ness and solicits yours.
a." h. Mcdonald,
General Agent, Rock Island System,
HO Third Street, Portland, Ore.
I
I.TSBr
HI 1 '