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About The morning Astorian. (Astoria, Or.) 1899-1930 | View Entire Issue (May 5, 1905)
I 1 ...
FBI DAY, VAY B, 1908.
THE MORNING5ASTORIAN, ASTORIA OREGON.
The Western Academy of Music
. tlwutlon, Oratory and ,-Dramatl Art f Portland ' ,Orgon,
o- & ,- t . X j. - s.1
Prof. Adrian Cpplng
Havo oponad a branoh In
P. tsrms and tlm. apply to
e82 Commorolal Stroott Attorla.
Torino tor wfooMr. Epplnf.IJ.50; Mr. ShlelJt, $1.00.
Torino for 'Elocution, Oratory and DramaUe Art Mr. Rasmus 1180
par lesson. , . , ,
Tormo for riano, MUo lUynoUa, f 1.50 par lesson.
Join th ladLs 01. Club and Bight Singing claao, under tho Injunc
tion ox Mr. Epplng, .Terms,
ASTORIA IRON WORKS
JOHN FOX, Pres. and Suyt A- L. FOX. Vie Pre.
r L UIS110P. Secretary , ASTOUIA SAVINGS DANK, Trew
Designers and Manufacturers of
THE LATEST IMPBOVED
Canning Machinery, Marine Engines and Boilers,
' - . t - . .- .
CORRESPONDENCE SOLICITED. ,
v : Scow-Bay iron 8 Brass Work's
v Klanafactarers cn
!I ,' fr?" "Steel, 'Jfaittanff'BrohtV 'fStxagC'-"
,r, t iBeneraj.-FoundrFtnea and fattcrnmakeri
J Absolutely firstclaas
Phone 2451. 11 Corner E(i(ht?enth and FranWia
V ' The Finest Hotel fn'ttieNonhwest'; ;
PO RTLAN D OREGON. '
W. OriVS M.n.r
. Sheririatt Transfer Co.
4 IHENRY SnERMAN, Manager , 1
Hacks, Carriages Baggag Chocked and Transferred Trncks and
Furniture Wagons- Pianos Moved, Boxed and Shipped. .
433 Commercial Street Phone Main 121
ASTORIA SAVINGS BANK
Capital Paid In tl00,00a Sarplm and Undivided Profiti 35.00C ..
Tranaaota a general banking btuinew. ' Intareat paid on time depoaita,
J. Q. A. BOwLBY, O.L PETERSON,
J 68 TENTH STREET. ASTORIA. ORE.
' Prof, w. M. Rasmus
Mr, John Shields, Looal Manager, No.
$1,00 par month, oacb claaa.
Has always in stock a
fine assortment of
Boots and Shoes
BRAND RUBBER BOOTS. 2
and See. Bond Street. q
If you want a good, clean meal or if you
are iu hurry you should
go to the
,Thii fine restaurant it thoroughly up-to-
date In every detail.
- '"' t a
Pool of Fourth Street AitorU, Or
work Prices lowest
Wa aro thorooghly prepared for making
eatiinatea and executing 6rdera (or
all klndo of electrical inatalltng and
repairing. Buppllea in otock. Wa
Mil tho Celebrated SHELBY LAMP.
Call up Phone 116L
428 BOND STREET
FHiJN& rAvlUN, J. W. OA NER
Membership in Church no Bar to
" Profanlly. t ,i;
OPINION OF r, PAP PERKINS
Two Daaeon. Ct Into an Altercation
Ovim Trivial Matter and Fight It
Out by Rounds, lnt.rtp.rMd With
Cholo. Epithet and Profanity.
y" KVEHAL evenu bare bapjwned
alup. Ujo town of Jwlcbo wo.
foun'lcd to atuike It from centet
to drcumfcrence, but notliliifi
mr produced greater rxeltement fhnii
Jencon Ilardnma'a low.nlt arilnat
Deacon Goodhue.. Both were atead;
old men who were looked op to by the
community, and they bad been frlehd
rot yeara. -. v ! . -
On day Deacon Ooodhw borrowed
the otbera boe to work In tbe garden
and a few mtnnt later broka It off
run ajtd nrcaa tuft CLmrmtD tJra
JlOIXJLD OX TUB OIUSS TOOKTUXB.
at the ahank. Wbllo he contended that
It waa old and rutty and ready tc
break, be offered to bny a new one to
replace It Much to bla eurprUc, be
wa allowed to do ao, and bo went
home to any to hla wife:
'Martha, Pre known Deacon Hard
man for thirty yean and bare In.
fonnd hlra ouL lie, a human boR
and If be erer goea to bear en I want
to go aomewhere eUe."
For two wecka after that the two
deacon, nodded coldly to each other
whenever they met, and It gradually
became known to Jericho that their
relntlona were .trained. Then one
morning Deacon Goodhue aet ont to
drlr five bog. over to tho weighing
acaleo. II bad to paaa tho other dea
con'a house, and aa bo camo along the
gate waa open and all tho hoga made
a ruab for It Ha waa trying to drire
them out of Deacon Hardman's yard
when tho latter cam ont and aald:
"fir gum. Deacon Goodboe, bat tbia
la goln' too for too fori Ton opened
that gate and drl? your hoga In on me
"I never did, and yon know I dldntr
retorted Deacon Goodhue aa b. panaod.
In bta nnnlng. , , ,
Tea, yon did." . H-' -m. .-
Ko, I didn't". . .
"Do you call in a BarT, , .
Tea, if yon call m oner . ,
"Take It back, or 111 mop the grotmd
with your , .-, . v . .
"Com ont bora, and I'll make. you.
aeoataren. ,. -: ,
, Then and then the deacons clinched
and rolled on tbe graaa together, end
they were choking oacb .otfier . and
breathing bard when Mosea Schemer
horn came along and 'aeparated' them!
Deacon nardman weut atralght to Jus-
tic Somerfleld and awore out a war
rant for assault and battery, and two
daya later tho trial cam off, and Jerl
cbo had a acutatlon to beat a laddslide
or a volcano.
Both mou bad their friends and the
public was divided. The only person
who had wltneaiied the fracas was Dea
con Hardman's wife, but there were
other witnesses sworn.
.. Old Mrs. Taylor swore that she bad
always suspected Deacon Goodhue to
bo a man of violent temper and that
b only needed to be kicked to become
murderer. Moses Hunt waa a mile
away that morning looking for his
cow, but bo swore that Deacon Hard
man was the sort of man to lose bis
temper and do awfnl things if he found
a strange bog rooting up bis holly
hocks. Abner Crossman, who bad
known both parties for thirteen years,
swore that b bad known Deacon
Goodhu to fall off a haystack, get
mired In a swamp and fight bumble
bees for half an hour without losing
the smile on his face, and he could not
beller that he bad begun thla fuss.
Opposed to htm waa Trnebeart John
Son, who said ba bad aeen Deacon
nardman kicked bead over heel by a
cow, ran over by a hog and knocked
down by a ram and that he preserved
a humble spirit throughout- and oven
asked tho cow to forgive him If be bad
hurt her feelings. - ,
v Mrs. Hardman's testimony was that
ah waa waahing the dishes after
breakfast when she beard her husband
$fio followed fifuj 16 tfie'Swr aud'neirl
and saw all that subsequently passed,
Oiouh In sucb a nervous state tUat tbe
coold not be sure of anything. She felt
almost sure that Deacon Goodhue takl
by gum' snd "devil" and "old crank,"
tut ah wouldn't b poaltlv of H.
gb was Slmost a sure that her hat
band started to sing a hymn snd made
some gcrfptsrs! quotation, but she
bight have been mistaken. 8b was
sot aor who grabbed tbe other first,
bat she coold swear os the living Bible
that they bad trodden aU the cveun
bars Into the earth and broken down
most of br tiger Ulles. ftbe ended by
saying that she had bad rheumatism
for twnty-ig years snd that when
ever sb returned a cap of borrowed
sugar aba always heaped tbe measure
It took two days to try the case, and j
meanwbiM all business, Including the
nawinlll, waa suspended. Tber was
so jury, snd when almost everybody
m town had sworn on on aid or the
other JoAtlce Bomerfleld put on bis
most dignified look and aald: : .
"This case teems to go back to the
bo and to Deacon Goodhue's garden.
Was there any need of tbe deacon
working in bis garden that day What
bad become of bis own boe? Waa tbe
borrowed boe rusty In tbe shank or
was it not? If Deacon Gooilhu bad
not bit s stone with it would It bav.
broken? He offered to buy a new bo
to reploco tbe old one, but wasn't he
hoping that Deacon Ilordman would
refuse It? Deacon yardman bad bad
that bo for ten long years, and was
be gbtd that It was broken and that bo
bad s chance to get a new on In It
"Then ther wer tbe hoga. Any man
who had ever et out to drive on bog
along the road, to say nothing about
Ova, knew that the animal wouldn't go
straight for a rod at a time. He
couldn't spy a bole in tbe fence without
wanting to see If it was a fit Ho
wouldn't be a bog to paaa an open gate
without making a rush for the open
"Then the deacons confronted each
other. They were feeling edgewise
about tbe boe, and it waa to be in
f erred that it didn't take much to get
their backs ijp. As to whether the lie
was actually given and who gave It
first 1 a matter in doubt Tbe same
la true as to who grabbed first but
there can be no possible doubt that
many cucumbers and tiger Ulles were
destroyed and that Deacon Ilardman
emerged from the conflict with a skin
ned nose. Taken full and by and back
and forth, it waa about an even thing.
Tbe costs will be divided between
them, business resumed at 7 o'clock
tomorrow morning, and If either has
any bard cider in the cellar be will be
expected to treat the other, and both
make up and let boea and bogs go to
grass forever mors." . M. QUAD.
Gtvia.tr Uim VacU.
A young man with a swelled head
made a peremptory demand for an
Increase In salary. Tbe bead of tbe
concern did not dispute hla argument
that he bod done much to build np the
business of tbe firm, but tried to con
vine the young man that every one'a
position could be filled.
Suppose, for butane," aald be.
"you should die. Borne on would take
"Oh," replied th young man, "that la
Then yon may eupposn yourself dis
charged," waa the answer of th em
ployer, "and you will find that la
bard fact" New York Press.
A L4y f ImtHtrtvae.
After a panic stricken search Doro-
tky'a mother bad found her three-year-
old seated In state in th village sta
tion with her doll -held tightly la her
arms. .... v '
."Why, Dorothy, you naughty little
girl, to get loatr scolded ber mother.
Dorothy drew herself up with s fine
assumption of dignity. "I m not lost.
she Insisted. "I know wbere I am; I
am a big lady, with my baby, waiting
to, take th train."
Tk laatrnmvat Thr f.
"Ilavent you got any toothpicks?"
asked the tourist In tbe Arizona res
Toothpick?" queried tie cashier.
"what's the matter? Didn't the waiter
give ye , fork y Catholic Standard
and Times. j
; A Literary Hrait, ' ,:
"Let roe Introduce you to that debu
tante," said the hostess. "She la a
poem." . , J
"Yes," answered the eligible man.. "I
feci that she Is one of tue poems I
ought to know." Washington Star.
Foreigner Why do you call him your
American Ob, he has originated so
many sensational ways of sending hi
money. Brooklyn Life.
Hie Maxim flood.
Tbe game was proverbs, and when It
was four-year-old Harola'a (urn he of
fered, "It la never too late for men."
Now York Globe.
-iai. - '
We are Bovine, we are tnovtng I
Nee4 I mention aU our woeaT
I will limply mv the meaaure
. rreeen (Sown ana overflow.
X hav hearS aome folks oemplaliung
I a saejUMr saoat Mlwtae-
That ther cannot take their treaauiM
' To their taanstena ta th kle
But th fact that wa take nothing
Bvetaa to em the beet of aU
Juat to move anil find your bate
. On th. hatraok In tbe hall.
Bachelor Atjempb is Dictate to
;s Mother; . "
MEVER HAD AfiY BUTKNOVV5
Bli.VM the Mother, of th. Count";
Hav. no Proper Conotption of tbe
Proper Traiting and Eduction of
Th.ir 8n. and Oaughters. '"'
, A bachelor of observation Is antLor
lty for tbe statement that no more
:aan nail th mother in civilization
(ring up their children properly. Does
s mother slap, cuff or jerk the tender
little beings confided to ber care? Doe
she nse abusive - language to them?
Does abe break ber promises to them)
Doe she scare them into fita by telling
them the policeman or tb big, bad
man will com and carry them otf If
they do not obey ber? Does ah ever
tell them a He? Does ah allow their
sweet little bodies to become untidy?
Then that woman la not fit to bav
children, do matter who or what she Is,
declare tb bachelor. Boya learn rod-
nes and violence from their own moth
era. How can they b other than 111
bred, destructive young savages? Lit
tle girls bear tbelr mothers tell petty
falsehoods; they bear ber scold vio
lently; they see ber rude, impolite and
untidy In ber own family circle. How,
then, can these little girls become
sweet tempered, sincere, neat and high
bred women? Are tbe son. of Quaker
mothers ever found among tb gangs
of young street ruffians? I am report
ing still the opinion of tbe wise bache
lor. Bo fully convinced la he of th
truth of all thla that he Is sure it
would be a atep forward for tb race
if tb training of little children were
taken out of tb bands of their moth
ers and given to women who have made
a scientific study of It Tbe scientific
rearing of children is-quite compatible
with love and tenderness, with "good
manners, good temper and good mor
ale. So says tbe bachelor.
;', st st
Don't let as put on airs, not sny of
os. It la quite possible If we. could
trace our distinguished family back
only two or three removes that we
would come upon s grandfather who
picked his teeth with a fork.
Nothing win 'wake tbe women of
Busaia to the need of their sex par
Cclpatlng In public affairs Ilk th In
human war against Japan, with grand
dukes driving woman's best beloved
to be slaughtered for a quarrel whose
cause they do not know. Not long
since th women of Moscow sent to
Empress Allx a petition begging ber
to try to stop tb war. It la on of
th most pathetic documents on rec
ord. "Oh, sovereign," It said, "moth
era whose hearts are breaking cannot
remain silent Our best forces are per
Th Russian revolutionist party In
Its manifesto to tb emperor mad de
mand for a "universal equal and secret
ballot for male snd female cltisens."
Put that down to tbe credit of the Rus
Italy baa s woman orchestra leader
of distinction. Her nam la Palmira
Orso. Recently ah led tbe orchestra
during a great performance of tho
opera "EroanT st Llvorno.
' . t H
I don't know wbo wrot th story or
I would. give her credit I am sure
It was a woman. ' Once' a gentleman
and his wife. spent considerable time
studylna American ; Indian life and
customs? During a walk, they saw
au Indian chlefa family "moving
Tbe chief himself stalked ahead, ma
jestic as an eagle. He waa an exceed
ingly chesty chief. He stuck up his
chin and threw out bis breast as If be
owned the universe. "See bow splen
didly that chief carrlea himself," said
the gentleman. VYes," replied the lady,
"and see how splendidly bis wife car
rlea that stover
In th vast and varied field of Indus
trial electricity are many openings for
women. Prom tbe running of an elec
trical engine to tbe manufacture of
electrical Instruments there la employ
ment for the woman wbo baa qualified
herself to do It
. at ll
Have yon noted recently th number
of alleged wis men Who feel s call to
lay down tb law as to the proper
spher and duties of women? 8och
would b authorities on women folk are
plentiful aa grand duke in Busaia,
How many years, pray, bav these men
been women that they should know all
about It? Let them wait till they them
selves hav been women awhile before
taking It en themselves to Instruct tb
feminine sex as to what Its spher H.
Stupendous Is th eonotit of the mascu
On of th most promtotng sWras ef
tb times la tb sight f young, wealthy
and beautiful wexneo on every hand
turning from the eanpry pleasure of
fashion and society to tale oa thesa-
selvcs, aq'ld, rueful work for tbe 1gn
rant' aul unfortunate." Never before)
were so many rich women engaged ta
real philanthropic work, not mere os
tentatious charity. Early these hav
discovered that no lasting bawls
can be found outside of useful work.
' 1 H ..; ';'; i
Note-Professor James It Tufts
tb co-ed University of Cblcsgo asks)
hi class In ethics tb following pertt
sent questions: "Do yon toll whit)
lies?" "Do you tell harmless but out
landish and untrue stories r1 "Do" yoa
band your far to tbe conductor after
he baa paawd you without seeing yon t
Do you? .... .
. ELIZA ABCHAttD CONNER,
The prize contest la Indians tedse
for gwd attendance la proving a sue-
cess and bringing th members to
gether In weekly conventions. The
prize for tbe best average attendance)
for the term are: For tbe C. C, a dia
mond studied charm valued at llS;for
tbe K. of R. and GL. a .diamond stud
ded charm valued at 85; for tb M. of
P, a diamond studded charm valued
.. v-v-: , .,,.
' Recent reports show tb endowment
rank la growing in the Indian Terri
tory aa never before In it history.
Welcome lodge of Muncle, Ind, re-',
cestly dedicated a new castle hail and
on that occasion Initiated a class of 100 '
The endowment rank is In a flourish
ing condition and enjoying a aubstaa-
tial growth. It ba resource In excess
of liabilities of 1887.000. ' a . r;
A class of 100 candidate was recent
ly Initiated la Buffalo, N. Y. .
Lat4ls ef the Meaera Bfaceatwea.
New hives have been instituted ta
Butte, Mont; Seattle, Wash.; East To
ledo, o, snd Taylorsvtlle, IU
Hlv No. 870 of Rock Island. HL, re
cently initiated a class of twenty can
didates. Two new hives were recently htt
toted In Cincinnati, O.
ltraj Xclshbor mt Aaawvteaw
Recent reports show the Roys) NelgJs-
bors have a beneficial membership m
good standing of 86,000.
The Illinois jurisdiction now ha a
beneficial membership of over 21,000.
1 A Ckut. '
Her loveliness eompelUnar
Threw m Into a trance, '
And I eaverlr accepted
When ah offered me a chanoc
- - . , . .
And thoturh sh offered other saett
; A chaac I didn't car.
Tor ah waa Utn( chanoe
On raffl at a talr.
."V". - . Jod
CIard for Action.'
When the body Is cleared for action.
by Dr. King's New Life Pills, you can
tell it by the bloom of health on the
cheeks; the brightness of the eye; tb
firmness oC the flesh and muscles; tbe
buoyancy the mind. Try them. At
Chaa. Rogers drug store, 23 cents.
ID MEII OIlLIf
' : . ,. :
lluch That Every Woman Desires to
Know About Sanative, Antiseptic
Cleansing and the-Cara of tha
Skin, Scafp, Hair, and Hands.
. does for: women;
' Too much, stress cannot be placed '
on the great value of Cuticur Soap, '
Ointment and Pilla in the. antisep
tic cleansing of tbe mucous sur-'.
faces, and of the blood and circulating .
fluids, thus affording pure, sweet, and
economical local and constitutional
treatment for weakening ulcerations, ''
inflammations, itchings, irritstions,
relaxations, displacements, pains, and
irregularities peculiar to females. .
Hence tbe Cuticura remedies have a
wonderful influence in restoring
health, strength, and beauty to weary
women, who have been prematurely
aged and invalided by these distress
ing ailments, as well aa such sympa
thetic afflictions aa anaemia, chlorosis,
hysteria, and nervousness.
Women from the very first have
fully appreciated the purity and sweet
ness, the power to afford immediate
relief, tbe certainty of speedy and
permanent cure, the absolute safety
and great economy which have mad
Cuticura the standard humour rem
edy of the civilized world
Cured by Cutlcar&u
1 suffered five years with a terrible
Itching eczema, my body and face be
ing covered with sores. Never in my
life did I experience such awful suffer
ing, and I longed for death, which I
felt waa near. I bad tried doctors and
medicines without success, but my
mother insisted that I try Cuticura.
X felt better after the first application
of Cuticura Ointment, and waa sooa
. entirely well. . Mrs. A. EUon, Belle-
tp, OfvtmsjBi taxi TITti an M tferassi
ttM Iff Cba. Corasjlantsrwasl
fhc wrkL Potter