FAQS TWO. THE MORNING ASTORIAN. Established 1873; RATES. ij mail, per year 16 W By mail, per month 50 B j carriers, per mouth 60 THE SEMI-WEEKLY ASTOKIAN. By mail, per year, in advance $1 00 ASTORIAN PUBLISHING COMPANY. OUR WAR THAT DID NOT HAPPEN. There is a striking similarity betwen the feelings f the Russians toward Americans at the present time and the sentiments of Frenchmen 100 years ago. "Ungrateful Americans," the Russians call us. The Frenchmen used harder names. For what France did for us in the war of the revolution our gratitude always was and always has been profound, hut it was perfectly well understood that France's larger part in American affairs at that THE MORNING ASTORIAN, SUNDAY, MAY 1, 1901. . 13, tion but yourself, and the sooner you answer it and act upon your decision the better it will be for you. Make up your mind to do something that will 1m? honorable, and do it quickly and persistently. Re member that every record to true success runs through a high and righteous purpose. Dou't wait for something to turn up like Kieawber did, but go out and turn' it up. That something is waiting to be turned up, and if you do not turn it up, someone else will. The world admires and applauds a hustler, and there is no promise anywhere of success to either the lazy man or the coward. Courage is as necessary to success in the peaceful pursuits of life as on the battlefield, and . in neither . place can victory be achieved without it. "Lives of great men all around us, . We can make our lives sublime; And departing leave behind us Footprints on the sands of time. "Footprints that perhaps another Sailing o'er life's troubled main; A forlorn and shipwrecked brother Seeing may take hold again. "Let us then be up and doing, With a heart for any fate Still achieving, still pursuing, Learn to labor and to wait." 3 ears We perspire a pint a day without knowing it; ought to ; if not, there's trouble ahead. The ob structed skin becomes sallow or breaks out in pimples. The trouble goes deeper, but this is trouble enough. If you use Pears' Soap, no matter how often, the skin is . clear and soft and open and clear. Sold all cvwr the world. Dr. VAUOIIAN, Dentist. P)ll,Un Building, Astoria, Oregon. Dr. T. L HALL DENTIST Kl Commercial street Astoria Ore. Dr. W. 0. LOGAN DENTIST 678 Commercial St, Sbanalian Building ROBBED THE GRAVE. A startling Incident li related by John Oliver of Philadelphia, m fol lows "I wm In awful condition. My kin waa almost yellow, eye aunken, tongue coated, pain continually In back and aides, no appetite, growing weaker day by day. Three phyatclana had given me up. Then I was advlaed to use Electrlo Bitters; to my great 1 J 1 1 ..- . . time was due very materially to a desire for revenge, me worm is iuu oi ucnwui . .u v,u flp9t boUJ made a deo,ded m. wlio get Uiere Dy courage, inuuiirjr unu uvucsigr, pr0vement upon the British. And right well did the plan work. Still, it was. a good thing for America that France took a hand in the game. Frenchmen helped to win Torktown. But gratitude, however sincere and generous, can never keep down those mere sturdy promptings of the heart. Genet, their first minister, came over, tried to drag us into another war with Great Britain, and acted as if he owned the country. It was quite necessry that he should go back home. Then, when this government made the Jay treaty with Great Britain, France expressed her anger, ordered our minister to leave, and began to capture American vessels. Our commissioners, sent to Paris, were ap proached with requests for bribes. The correspond ence with the French officials on this subject, after ward published in full, carried very high the popu lar cry, "Millions for defense, not one cent for trib ute." Indeed, matters went so far that an army was raised; Washington, then 68, came forth and com manded it; warships were built, and Truxton cap tured two French frigates, all of which led to a bet ter understanding in which France did the proper thing and ceased her high-handed proceedings. Frenchmen have never quite excused this chapter in American history, and a few of them are inclined to call it American ingratitude, forgetting that any ether course on the part of the people would have been the surrender of their manliness and independ ence. Fortunately, the strain between the United ' States and Russia is nothing like so strong as that "between the United States and France, but because Russia gave the union moral support in the civil war her statesmen conceive it to be our duty to sympathize with her in her present trouble. Unfortunately, they do not understand that our , president, and secretary of state, and congress, and all our other bodies have not influence enough, or law enough, or authority enough to control that in definable but potent something called public senti ment, even if they so desired. It has been interesting to watch the expression of this sentiment in America since the war began. At first it seemed to be largely the feeling that goes to the little fellow in he fight. Then Japan's success and Russia's unpreparedness had something to do with its increase and the outburst of the paragraph ers, who undoubtedly wield an influence upon the surface though and conversation of the day. But as the war has settled down to business there has been a calmer canvass of the situation, and on the whole Russia has small cause to complain of America's fair ness. Indeed, the warmest hope among our people seems to be that this government shall not get into any part of the quarrel. Saturday Evening Post DEFINITION OF A KISS. Kiss is a noun, it is a name; proper noun because it's the proper thing to do when they are ready and the heart is willing; plural number because two per form it, common gender, because it is performed by one of each sex, possessive case, because it possesses a delicate infatuation for the human race and agrees with the parties performing the act. Kissing is closely connected wth "buss," which is a good old backwoods expression meaning a kiss that is highly enjoyed by two greenhorns who have powerful lungs to perform the act with. In this case buss means one kiss; rebus means kiss again; plunbus means a num ber of kisses; hornibus means to be caught by the old folks; nierriribus means to steal a kiss; sympli bus means to kiss the hands instead of the lips; blunderbus means to kiss an old maid by mistake, and omnibus means to kiss all present, including the mother-in-law. Exchange. J TO YOUNG MEN. The young man of today is asking the question: ;mat shall I dot" No one can answer this ques- I contlnuerd their use for the shores of time are strewn with the wrecks of three weeks, and am now a welt man lives who lacked these winning qualities. Success I know they robbed the grave of an u i, f , ,w nf ,mn,. n,l ha who snciwds other victim." No one should fall to KilVvni av IJiiV vtws. v v'v;vj ....v. . . . i l a! t . aV I Wiem. JIUJ Of vemn, welcomes it ana emoraces iw umumj t Char,e$ Roger,.( drU8glBt while he who fails m the battle or. nte naa not uie tn PnfPr the fiold and strve for the prize. The Northern Pacl.lc Railway Com j pany wm pince rouna inp ucneis irum Dnrttnn.4 in St T Jin I a nmt return on A small Japanese force has succeeded in crossing nt of the W0l.iu.1( fttlr on ,ttie a8 C. J. TRENCH A RI) Insurance, Commission and Shipping. CUSTOMS HOUSE BROKER. Agent Wells-Fsrgo and Northern Paolfto Express Companies, Cor. ELEVENTH and BOND 8TS. JAY TUTTLE, M. D. MUSICIAN AND 8UHOEON Anting Assistant Burgeon V. 8. Marine Hospital Hervtee. Office hours: 10 to II am. 1 to 4:10 p.m. 477 Commercial Street, Ind Floor. Dr. UIIODA 0. HICKS OSTEOPATHY Mansell lildg. 171 Commercial St rilONK BUCK MIA, O. W. BAKU, DENTIST Maoaetl Building 573 Commercial Street, Astoria, Or TELEPHONE RED 20(11. Vtnr oo to "Oouumm" TO LEARN DOON-HECrlNQ a I a . pinnfi f 1 a or tnrf a e.va nomn WMka for l or HUTt'SB MOM KT I rmmuff riMITIO, tittl fWwi tilt) VHk NUN. hT. I hut. tu pUK V VV t "tltnwilKUi ' MA ' .. WlHTtt. J. n. (HMlliWIM, tiJM-rt 111 llrtlMtWIOT, . tit MA v xxMataal, Kvm the Yalu river and effecting a lodgment on the Man- follows: churian side of that stream. The Russian opposition to the crossing does not seem to have been either very fierce or prolonged. It is altogether probable that the Russians would be glad to see the Japanese cross the Yalu in considerable force. There is no bridge as May 11th, 12th and 13th. June 16th, 17th and 18th. July 1st, 2nd and 3rd. August 8th, 9th and 10th. Sept 5th, 6th and 7th. October 3rd, 4th and 5th. The round trip rate to St. Louis and GASOLINE ENGINES a- i . . , 't- Marine and Stationary. From l.S t' so Horse power Ad ahsiilately FirslClius ENGINE at Reasonable Trioe. lM tno send yott a catalogue and prlcva. R. M. THORNBURG. KNAPPTON, WASH. vet across the Yalu, and a wide and deep river be- return from rortland will be tuo. . .. , , . Tickets will be good for return via any tween xne Japanese army auu us u-u umu uui direct M an ideal condition of affairs for the Japanese army. A round trip rate of 172.50 win also With their usual free talking, Russian officers have M made from Portland to Chicago and :x i ' i 4U .1 l 1 u T., return, given ii oui si-verai ihiict uu.i uk) yx uw u ft genger deg,reg t0 take )n both anese would cross the Yalu and that they would not Chicago and St Louis the round trip verv seriously ooDOse the passace. although, of rate will be $75.00, course, they would inflict all of the damage that they could do. It is not likely, in view of this, that the All tickets will be good for 90 days from date of sale. Tickets will De trnrA erlr an ilflVI fmm tint flf fl !l Japanese have fallen into any Russian trap as yet. -too-over can be had They have a small flotilla of torpedo vessels at the on the golng trlp and on tne return mouth of the Yalu, and it is quite possible that, if trip passengers can stop at their pleas- they do effect a landing in force on the Manchurian ure west of the Missouri river or' St. side of the stream, they will keep in touch with their Paul. These rates apply via direct Wr nml tnUish n tipw W t imi nf thn harbor llne8- but ,f Pse"r wlBhe8 t0 re- , , . . , , , , , . ... turn through California tickets can be on the Manchurian side, thus shortening anew their flprr,InIrlv. hllt ftt ftn lncrea.ed line of communication. - rntn-nf tirriA aApa nbove. , For any additional Information de- Salmon packers are quoting prices for this sea- sired, call or address A. D. Charlton, son's catch of salmon, despite the warning of the Assistant General Passenger Agent, , , , i. ....I t i i c Uorthern Pacific Ry., 255 Morrison sage xnai ciucKens khuuiu uui uc uuuiiit.-iiin.-u ur.ivivi they are hatched, street, corner of 3rd, Portland, Ore. "Without any sense of humor life would be a cold, cheerless waste. It would be like traveling over the rocky road of life in a buggy without springs to it. Some women are fond of fine horse.?, and some are !ond of their husbands. The fact is, women are fond of most anything they can drive. It is said from good authority that cigarette smok- . 1 1 At. . . .A. I ing injures tne mmu, oui ine average cigarette smoker has not got a mind. OREGON SllOip LINE BT1r ,m.i Via Mrl 7t hoars frem Pertlasid to Chicago. Ne ohange ef aara. It is useless for you to pray to God to take the root of evil out of your enemies as long as you keep cultivating the old stock. Dspart A man should not marry for money, but he should not let a girl become an old maid just because she is rich. . . GhJoage rvuui st. via Huat-I MsltUks, Daavsr, Ft worts, uunaba, Kan- as Clu, Mi Levis, Ckisuge aad tbe East iMS Kxsreas "As righteousness tendeth to life, so he that pur- " sueth evil pursueth it to his own death." Solomon. Love is said to be blind, but marriage is an insti tution that sometimes opens the eyes of the blind. St. Past rant Urn 7:4 p. ol la Spa-kaae '1IMK W'HEUl'LKB Krom PORTLAND sit Ike. Denver Ffl worm. uinbft, Kan- via UnV-Su City. Bt Laali, uuicagoana uwi Walla Walla, fewls too, Hookane, lllone- polls. 8tFul, Uulutbl Miiwsusee, vnieago, sad Cast Arrive ANDREW ASP, BLACKSMITH. Having installed a ltubWr Tiring Maohine of the latest pattern I am prepared to do all kinds of work in that Hot at reasonable prices. Telephone 291. CORNER TWELFTH AND DUANE STREETS. HOTEL PORTLAND The Finest Hotel In the Northwest PORTLAND. OREGON. rxxxxxrxxxi H crxzzxxzzxzx FRESH AND CURED MEATS Wholesale and Retail Ships, Logging Camps and Mills supplied on abort notice. LIVE STOCK BOUGHT AND SOLI) WASHINGTON MARKET - CHRISTENSON Q CO. VYTTTTTtttt?TIITIIirTTTTTYTTTTTrrrTTTTItTIITTtttttTT'T Somethiiig New Ranges, Stoves, Iron Beds and FurnituTS of all iinds Also a good assortment of Second Hand Goods at Lowest Prices. L. H. HENNING5EN Q CO. 504 BOND STREET, ASTORIA, OREGON. PHONE, RED 2305 Scow Bay Iron 8 Brass Works Uaafittirers of Sdtai Mass I:Mm An engagement is as good as a marriage, and in I many instances it is much better. OCBAM AMD RIVER SCHEDULE Fr ens Astaria AM aaallBg tates subject to ehaage. For Sasi Prancisca avary five days. He is surely most in need of another's patience who! EJL'J'IS.. hfla t, Viw nwrt Sfllftr-ted. ' aWamlUndlngs Icolomkla River to Pertlsnd uud Way 4am Daily ex cept Hon Staaaaer Nahcatta leaves Astoria on They always talk who never think, and who have tide daur except Bunday tor nwaco. the least to sav. Prior. otaU there with trains for Long w f I Beacli, Tioga and Nona Beach polnte. liie average mail wxii uuiutca tuuauvw aiiucci t a . I?, ii I iu years 01 ms me. TkraasA Usketa U aai (ran al prin- I - steel tirapeaa at ties. Coneress has adjourned, but its political thunder! yr . Roberts, will Hvft on 1 Aatat, Ore. Iran, Steel, Brass and Bronze Castiags. General Foundrytncn and Patternmakers. Absolutely nrstclass work. Prices lowest Pbene 2451. Corner Eighteenth end Franklin. The Werlfs Fair Route. These aattotpatlng aa eastern trip, r a TMt te the Louisiana Purchase expoaltloa at St Louis, eaJinot afford te everloek the advantages altered by the Mlssurl Paciflo Railway, which, on aeaisvnt ( 1U various routes and gate ways, haa beea appropriately named The Warld'a Fair RouU." -Paaeengera from the northwest take the Missouri Paciflo trains from Den ver or Pueblo, with the choice of either going direct through Kansas City, or via Wichita, Fort Scott and Pleaaant Hill. Two raataa dally frdm Denver and Paebla to St. Louis without change, carrying aU alaaaes of modern equip- meat. Including electrlo lighted Obser vation parlor cafe dining cars. Ten dally trafeaa between Kansas City and Bt. Lamia. .Wrtte sc sail aa TV. C. MeBrlde, gen eral agent, 114 Third Street, Portland, tor detailed mfostnatlon and Ulusttat ad Uteraftere. ASTORIA AND COLUMBIA RIVER RAlLTvQAD LEAVE PORTLAND ARRIVE l:Mam 7:N p mj Portland Union De pot for Astasia and Way TtntM U:ltin. :40pm ASTORIA. 7:ttam 1:10 p m for Peril and and Way PelnU U:Mam 10:M p m IXAIIDE DIVISION 8:U a ml 11:18 am 1:61 p m Astoria for Wareo- 7:40 a m ton, Plavel Port 4:00 pm Stevens, Hammond 10:4S a m land Seaside 1:11 a m t:Ham eanlde for War-I renton, naval. Hammond, Stereos) at U:Mpm 7:30 pn Fortl :16 am Snadey only Al trains matte etoaa semaotioM at Sows wttb aa Karmsrn Paatfks train, to and fraen M Bast and Sound potota. J. C. Mayo, Ckmeral Fra8tet and Pans. Agent