UICOLB COUNTY LEADER
RECOUPS, tdttar
r N HAVDCN, Maaasar
TOLEDO OREGON
The social circle must be squared be
fore one can get Into It.
The mosquito g the original back
biter, but It has some strong Imitators.
Strangely enough, the bandit of the
Yellowstone is not enguged In kenning
a hotel there.
The mnn who Just loafs around Is
never In any danger of being run down
by prosperity.
Even money that 'Abdul Hamld, when
he mingles with his people, will, keep
his boiler-plate shirt on.
A Chicago railway section band Is a
claimant for the Sen-Inn throne. Prob
ably his story will I'eter out.
Maybe the railroads would find their
business more profitable If they would
do more newspaper advertising at reg
ular cash rates.
Chicago may have a fourteen-Ftory
school building, l'erhaps It will be
superfluous to odd that the intention
Is to make it a high school.
A Wisconsin man has by fasting
cured himself of appendicitis. It is not
likely that this treatment will be gen
erally recommended by the doctors.
A hotel for the accommodation of
chorus girls only Is to bo built In New
York. It Is perhaps but fnir to suspect
that Pittsburg capital Is behind It.
A dressmaking expert asserts that a
"good figure Is a mighty fine asset."
Any figure less than $1,000,000 probably
would be considered too petite these
days.
No, Ferdinand, the fact that you rodt
In n horseless carriage In your extreme
Infancy does not necessarily mean that
you'will liave an automobile when you
are old.
Rome scientist has found that there
lire 5,200 ways In which death may
come. We wonder whether he has In
cluded being mistaken for deer by reck
less hunters?
A St. Louis woman the other day re
fused to spend $5 for the purpose of
locating her missing husband. Some
women would be willing to spend twice
that amount to lose theirs.
John P. has had his family traced
back to iXV) A. I)., when the Rockefell
ers were barons In southern France. It
is rather strange that lie did not, while
he was having the tracing done, dis
cover some connection between the
Rockefeller and Monrinereney families.
It is no organ of monopolists but nn
agricultural paper which declares that
the high price of meat is due, not to
any trust, but to the demands of young
married women, who, dreading the
hackneyed jokes about the culinary nt
tenipts of novices, have taken to serv
ing their husbands with steaks, "which
anybody can cook."
"Away with nil this superfluous
scribble," wrote the Crown Prince of
Germany on a bundle of government re
ports submitted by the minister of the
Interior. This Idea if enforced In the
United States would lie equivalent to
Baying "OIT with their heads" to a lot
of government employes, and a good
part of the business of government as
practiced Is to provide patronage for
the politicians.
To fill orders promptly, as do Ameri
cans by sudden and sensational in
creases in the number of employes in
times of rushing business, Is not the
European habit. Experience there loads
the newly arrived Immigrant to expect,
on finding a Job in this country, that It
will be his so long as he performs his
part properly. When he Is suddenly
dropped from It, often in poverty and
destitution, he promptly becomes an en
emy of all government and authority
The borderland between such state of
mind and criminality Is exceedingly
vague.
How many Americans enunciate dis
tinctly the name of the town In which
they live or of .any other town? The
heroine of a recent linguistic accident
had the excuse, at least, of being
strange to the English language. She
was Gorman, nnd lived In Pittsburg,
Pa. She wished to go to Norwalk, Ohio,
The agent gave her a ticket to Norfolk,
Vu., and she was taken there. She re
turned to Pittsburg and tried again.
This time she got a ticket to Newark,
N. J., and had to go back home again.
With her money gone and no friends,
file would have had n hard time but
for the kindness of n German painter
When she finally reached Norwalk she
had speit sixty dollars In railway tide
ets, when but for Indistinct enuncia
tion she would have had to spend only
seven dollars.
The 30,000 employes of a great Chi
cago manufacturing company are given
nn opjiortimlty to retire ou a pension
after they shall have been twenty years
in Its employ nnd have reached the age
of Co. Herein Is an assurance that a
considerable number of workers will
hnve something to depend on after their
days of productive labor shall have
come to an end. Either through the.
agency of the labor organizations to
which they belong or of the corpora
tions by which they are employed the
number of such workers is constantly
Increasing, and a grave socinl question
is a little nearer a settlement. The
recent British legislation for old age
pensions does not appeal to Americans.
Neither does the German compulsory
system. They recognize the Importance
of a provision for superannuated work
ers, but they are Inclined to believe that
time will bring with it a solution more
satisfactory than any which has been
worked out elsewhere. There is as yet
no demand for legislation on the sub
ject. Powerful Inbor organizations can
establish pension systems of their own,
ns the typographical union has clone.
The great corporations will gradually
make provision for the pensioning of
aged employes. There will still be a
host of workers not Included In either
of these categories. To them the com
bined Industrial insurance nnd annuity
plan recently put lu operation in Mas
sachusetts ought to commend Itself.
The State branch of the American Fed
eration of Labor has strongly advised
tbo workers to avail themselves of It,
and the indications are that they will
do soT A wage earner may make his
own provision for old age by setting
aside a smnll sum out of his weekly
wages. If he shall also get a pension
from an employer or a union, so mucb
the better.
. A bill which at first excited onlj
imusement and derision, but has since
ecelved serious consideration, has been
passed upon favorably by a standing
committee of the Rrltlsh House of Com-
nons, although it Is not likely to bc
onie law. It is known ns the "day-Ighr-saving
bill." The mirnose of It Is
to make It easier for the general public
to get up early In the mornincr. and
therefore to finish its day's work In
time to enjoy n reasonable amount of
outdoor recreation by davllirht. Tim
bill ns amended provides that nt two
o clock the morning of the second Sun
day In Anrll. standard t! mo ahnll la
advanced one hour, and set back an I
hour on the second Sundnv In Snntem.
ber. It Is an nttempt by leglslntlon to
induce or compel n new recomiltlon of
the old adage:
Enrly to bed nnd early to rise,
AJnkes a mnn healthy, wealthy and wise.
London olllee hours are late, ten
o'clock being the usual time of begin
ning business, Instead of hnlf-nnst pte-hf
or nine, as In American cities. The new
plan would therefore fix the beginning
of office hours nt nine o'clock, which
does not seem unreasonable. Since It
Is not projoscd to change the length of
the working day, closing time would
come an hour earlier during the months
which are lest adapted to outdoor
sport. It has been urged on behalf of
tne Din that this would hnve n consid
erable moral effect, since it would tempt
young men nwny from theaters and
other modern evening nmusements, and
send them to the golf links, the cricket
field nnd the river. Interesting ns the
plan Is, there are serious objections to
It which will occur to every one. Chief
among them are International obliga
tions In regard to mails, and the diffi
culty of keeping domestic railway
schedules In accord with the changing
standard of time.
IllliikN.
Rllnks, after inviting his friend Jinks,
who has Just returned from abroad, to
dinner, Is telling him what a fino
memory his little son Hobby has.
"And do you suppose ho will remem
ber me?" said Jinks.
"Ileme-mher you? Why, ho remom.
hers every face that he ever saw."
An hour later they enter the house
nnd after Jinks has shaken hands with
Mrs. P.llnks be calls Hobby over to
him.
"And do you remember me, my little
mnn ?"
" 'Course I do. You're the same feller
that pa brought home last summer and
ma was so wild nhotit It that she didn't
speak to pa for a whole week." Jluuinn
Life.
A Ilerllner.
On the theory that might goes before
right the Herllner fights his way past
old ladles nnd tired women Into crowd
ed tram cars nnd ruthlessly Jostles
from his path tho passerby in the
streets with nn obstinate Insolence
that goads the visitor ncciistoined to
the higher civilization of other capitals
to impotent fury. Iterlln Cor. London
Outlook.
After n country town gets the Idea
that it Is a city, the people stop call
ing the old people "Grandma" and
"Grandpa."
1
"I'm goln' to
live anyhow till
1 die," was the rather
terse way In whlcA a
nnrnilar nnflr nf fl
pressed a on "i
sound philosophy. It
furnishes an expla
nation of the happy-go-lucky
air that
characterizes most
nien engaged In dan
gerous lines of busi
ness; and a cursory
examination of the
employments that
many men choose
apparently of their
own free wills lends one to believe that
It is really a widespread sentiment.
On what other grounds, for Instance,
can one explain the extreme non
chalance with which the circus per
former follows his profession? He en
dangers life and limb continunlly in
billboard "thrillers," which grow every
year more nerve-racking. The loop the
loop Is already a thing of the past, by
far too tame for the up-to-date circus ;
and it is no longer sufficient to have
men place their lives In the balance,
but young women must needs be Im
pressed also. Take Miss Isabel Butler,
for Instance, who day In nnd day out
looped the gap in an automobile, turn
ing upside down in midair.
Modern psychologists declare that
Tlolent contrasts and great nervous
shocks are craved by a large proportion
of the people. It is to satisfy this
craving that the circus managers search
the wide world over for men and wom
en of daring, to introduce the "thrill
ers." One of the latest has been a
Norwegian, who travels the country
exhibiting In "n leap for life on slender
skees." From a platform more than
100 feet almve the ground, he coasts on
narrow wooden runners, eight feet In
length, down a long slippery runaway
tilted nt an ajrle of 4r degrees, to with
in hardly a yard of the level of the
arena, nnd then shoots out one hundred
feet through space, describing In his
flight an arc S3 feet high at the center.
The high diver who plunges from an
elevation of 50 or 00 feet Into a tank
of water as shallow and as narrow. It
would seem, ns can be built and still
nllow one chance for life to remain. Is
of course a constant attraction. Few
of those who follow this mild pastime
live to make use of nn accident In quite
the same way as did one Edward L.
Tune. After receiving an injury to the
fifth vertebra which raised a lump on
the back of his neck, he toured the big
cities with two confederates to serve
ns witnesres and mulcted street rail
way companies for large amounts In
damages by fulling off their cars and
simulating the actions of a man whose
spine had Just been injured.
Steeplejack and Iron Worker.
If their managers are to be believed,
men and women that perform these
feats receive proportionately high sal
nrles, and nre thus In a measure repaid.
But the steeplejack and the structural
Ironworker labor in really useful fields
for day wages which, to the ordinary
prosaic mortal at least, seem not nt all
commensurate with the risks they run.
Only a year or two ago a nonchalant
steeplejack climbed up and down the
face of tho Flatlron building In New
York City with no other aid than that
of his hands nnd feet for two dollars.
No less heedless of their lives are
the Ironworkers, who, In the every-day
course of work, run around on narrow
Iron girders loo feet and more above
tho level of tho street, throwing red
hot rivets from one to another, nnd
driving them home with giant swings
of sledges that would cause the ordin
ary man to lose bis balance even on
terra firma. Not content with these
risks they often ride through midair
on tho long Iron beams that the der
rick raises from the ground and lowers
Bgaln Into position ten, twenty, stories
above. High In the air without, visible
means of support, they engage in mimic
fights for the lx-neflt of the open-mouth
el bystanders. They have even been
known to stand on their heads on the
very highest upright of a skyscraper.
The Pliiciil Well Shooter.
The business of well-shooting. o-
serves mention. Here the perils center
not so much nbout the men that do the
actual work as about those who carry
nltro-glycerln to the wells. With a few
dozen cans of this extremely high ex
plosive on his mule wagon, the driver
sits placidly beside a catastrophe com
parable only to the crack o doom
Driving through mountainous country,
he Is lu constant danger of Mug blown
to atoms; for the slightest Jar is like
ly to cause nn explosion.
A few years ngo, one of these mule
teers approaching the town of Newton
Pa., along a straight road, halted his
team nnd alighted, Intending to be gone
only a moment. Left without gftidlng
fcaud, however, the mules became fright
i ll if
ened, and started toward the town at a
wild pace.
Some one saw them coming, and rec
ognizing the danger, turned back to
ward the village, shouting to the Inhab
itants to flee for their lives. In the
very center of the town the road
swerved In a curve, and It was Impos
sible that the mules could make the
turn without upsetting the wagon. The
Inhabitants, expecting every minute the
destruction of their homes, fled In hope
less confusion toward the woods, for
getting that at. the curve In the road,
right In the path of the disaster, stood
a schoolhouse filled with children too
young to make their escape. The
schoolmaster, who had been apprised of
the danger, saw that It would be Im
possible to remove them in time, and
seized the only alternative. Grasping
his umbrella, he rushed down the road
toward the advancing team, flapping It
in their faces. It was one ehnnce In a
hundred and It proved to be that one.
The mules slackened their pace until
one of those who had not yet left the
rph
THE STfcEPLEJACK.
THE lllOIS'WOKKEB.
scene was able to catch them by the
bridles and bring thein to a staud-
till.
niaka Ron by Logten,
In nil rural communities on the edge
if civilization, life is a matter of
chance; for the men that take unon
themselves the upbuilding of the fron
tier nre a brawny, hardy lot. They live
and work only by the sufferance of
their companions, nnd when one be
comes In any way objectionnble he had
best make precipitate tracks for some
other settlement if he does not care to
take up his abode suddenly in a six-
foot plot of ground. Their sports nre
rough, and their work Is rough.
Few modes of life, for instance, are
less gentle than is that of a loeelmr
camp, and few trades call for more
nerve, strength and agility than that
of the logger. In driving timber down
steep nnd rnpid streams he must be
able to walk or run across a bobbing,
shifting field of floating wood, many
sticks of which are' of themselves too
smnll to carry his weight. He must
often be ready to stand In swirling,
eddying water almost on the brink of
a cataract to free a log jam, with the
knowledge that nt any moment one of
the logs is likely to break nwnv nn.l
carry him with it down the stream.
Once he loses his footing, the logger
Is lost. Yet so expert do thev hnn
that. a man Is considered Incapable un
less he can ride on a single log without
getting wet.
, Perhaps not quite so spectacular as
logging, but certainly just as precari
A DANGEROUS
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iNEUW St'ILMIST MAKl'S DltAUIVC i.i," u.t i- it,.,,.. .7"
.... cs ixr,-
Mr. Head, woo made n wonucnui series or drawings of animals' eyes ran
n greut risk when he examined the eyes of the Mississippi alligator. The of
ficials of the Zoological Gardens drained the tank for him, and the alligator
was held by a rope passed between his jaws In order to prevent him winpping
at the investigator when he was using his ophthalmoscope. London Graphic
ous, Is the life of the diver. T: modern
times this calling has beon deprived of
much of the romanticism that surround
ed It lu earlier days before the diving
suit was brought to its present state
of perfection, when sunken galleons In
tropical waters were nn attraction for
the adventuresome. The diver usually
finds his lubor nowadays in busy har
bors where be Is no longer under the
necessity of battling with sharks and
cuttlefish ; but he still has to undergo
dangers enough to satisfy the most
daring spirit Once attired In his suit
and below the surface of the water he
Is helpless and absolutely dependent
upon his fellow workers above at the
air pump. The slightest carelessness
on their part, a failure to read his sig
nals aright, a mistake in the supply
of air, and his life hangs by a thread.
Nevertheless, though loaded with al
most two hundred pounds of lead and
copper, with an air hose and a life line
easily entangled dragging about after
bin; wherever he goes, and with his
head Incased In a ponderous and Im
penetrable helmet, he goes about his
work with all the gaiety of the butcher,
the baker, and the candlestick maker
in the old rhyme.
Indeed, divers have, been known who
had such a distaste for work that after
making a descent they would pick out
a soft spot In the river bed, or wher
ever they happened to be, and lie down
foi a nap. Alone under the water, they
were safe from the prying gaze of any
employer, and could dlsjiose of their
time as they saw fit, until the Invention
of nn electric system of signals.
If he wishes to sing or Joke over his
work, the diver must be his own audi
ence ; for from the moment the heavy
helmet Is fastened to his shoulders
until It Is taken off again, his loudest
shouting nre Inaudible to his comrades.
If an accident occurs, he can only pull
nt his life line, nnd then wait while his
rescuers are at work, unable to offer
the slightest suggestion.
Life Kilned SloTtl? Array.
In VMH a diver lost his life at the
Boonton, N. J., reservoir, and though
a single word spoken to his comrades
might have lieen his salvation, the hel
met effectually prevented Its utterance.
He bad lieen laboring under seventy
feet of water to close the opening of
a large Intake pipe with a huge ball
of wood and lead weighing several tons,
when In some manner his leg was
caught between the ball and the flange
of the pipe. The force exerted on the
ball by the suction of water was so
great that the divers who came to the
rescue were unable to overcome It, and
the unfortunate man could only lie
there on his back hopelessly waiting,
his life slowly ebbing away. For three
days he lay Imprisoned, and during
that time until he died his only com
munication with the outside world was
a handshake with the divers when they
came down, or when they flitted Into
the green haziness above.
The sense of separation from human
companionship that forces Itself upon
the diver In such a position is also a
part of the experience of the aeronaut,
and Is even more complete. The world
below him is only a minlnttlre toy
world; nil famillnr sounds have died
away, and he Is In the midst of a grent
silence. Round him nre the uncon
trollable forces of nature, and there Is
no hand to aid. He Is at the absolute
mercy of wind and weather, and can
trust only to his lucky stars. What ever
precautions he may take In the con
struction of bis balloon, his parachute,
or airship, there are always a thou
sand sources of unforeseen danger. Yet
the aeronaut goes about bis task with
the greatest equanimity Imaginable,
denying that there Is any danger, and
insisting that his profession Is the
greatest of sports. Montreal S!ar.
It looks ns If fifty years from now
children will be sung to sleep by some
one turning on the phonograph, Into
which mother sang before going off to
her bridge whist.
EXPERIMENT.
, T