BISK FUGITIVES FOBGET THEEft TROUBLES ; LEAD GIDDY LITE HJ
PABIS.1
Llly Marriage may be a failure, but
I am going to make some man prove It ;
to me. The New York Idea.
She (to fellow listener at muslcale) ,
What do you think of his execution?
He I'm In favor of It. Punch.
"Miss Smith has written a problem
novel, hasn't she?" "Yes." "What la
the problem?" "How to make It sell."!
Life.
"Life Is tjw uncertain," slie said. ."I
know It," he replied. "Let's get niar-
rled. One of us may die within a few
years." Chicago Record-Herald.
Wlggs Why do you always regard
blin with suspicion?' Waggs Well,
every time I see 1)1 in be linn a differ
ent umbrella. Philadelphia Record.
Teacher Miss Badger, what do you
understand by "the privileged classes?"
Coed The botany class. . They can go
out In the woods once In a while. Chi
cago Tribune.
Suitor I have the honor to ask for
your daughter's dowry. Irate Pa I
beg your pardon, sir! Suitor Kxcusej
uie; of course I meant your daughter's
hand. Vie Pour Rire.
"Marie, If James asks you to marry!
blm to-night, tell him to speak to me.'
"And If he doesn't, mamma?" "Tell
him I want to speak to him." Wom
an's Home Companion.
Newlywed My wife only allows me
three hooks In the closet to hang my
wardrobe on. Oletlmer Don't worry.
Before you've been married long one
Look will be enough for all your ward
robe. Stray Stories.
"Bllgglns says that when he went toi-rrk District Attorney, William Trav
school he was one of the brightest boys ers Jerome, may be In reference to the
In his class." "Yes," answered the
sporting man, "that's where so many
of us fall down getting out of the
class." Washington Star.
Mr. Wholesale My boy, I hope you
Have something out of your weekly sal
ary of $3. Boy Yes, Blr; I save $1
a week. Mr. Wholesale Ah ! I knew
I was paying you too much ! After this
I'll give jtm two! Boston Post.
"Papa says," remarked, the heiress,
"that you're a more fortune hunter."
"Well, now, my dear," replied the
shrewd fellow, "that's more or less true.
Your face Is your fortune, and that's
what attracts me." Philadelphia Rec
ord. "Oo-oo my!" exclaimed little Tom
my, hearing a church organ for the first
time, "what's that?" "Sh !" whispered
his mother, "that's the organ." "Good
"ness! It must be an awful big monkey
that goes with that." Philadelphia
Press. J .
Magistrate (to prisoner) What, you
liere again? I hadn't seen you lately,
and hoped you were reformed. How Is
It that you have again gone back to
your old ways? Prisoner Because I
am only Just, out of prison, sir. Boa
Vlvant.
"Deary me, John, here's another poor
feller ruuned over by one o' these 'ere
nutymobubbles!" "That alu'( notbln',
mother. They do say as In Rooshla
thousands o' poor folks are killed In
the streets along o' this 'ere autocar
cy !" The Bystander.
Cynic (savagely) They say the, fash,
lonable mother of to-day recognizes her
liaby only by looking at the nurse.
Fashionable Mother (unmoved) How
extraordinarily clever,' when one
changes nurses so often! I always tell
ours by the mail cart. London Tld
Blts. "I took out life Insurance In order
to, put something by tor a rainy day."
"Yes," answered' the cynical citizen
who has been following the life Insur
ance Investigation, "but you kuow how
little conscience some people have about
another man's umbrella." Washington
Star.
Kind Lady (to little boy with big
swelling In his cheek) Poor little
chap, he has evidently got a bnd gum
boil. Here are two sous; does your
tooth ache badly? Little Boy (remov
ing the "gumboil") Oh, no, inn'iun; I
was Just sucking a big piece of taffy.
Nos Lois Irs.
The young widow of an old husband
Inscribed the following words upon her
dear departed's tomb: "To the mem
ory of Mathurlu Bezuquet, who left
this vale of tears at the nge of 09
years, 11 month and 20 days, deeply
grieved at having to leave behind blm
the most charming and faithful of
wives." rele Mele.
. , "Where are you off to, In such a hur
ry?" "To the doctor for my husband."
"What's up with him?" "He tells me
lie has got hepatitis, dyspepsia, rheu
mat I sin, enteritis, gastritis, nppcndl-
cltls, nephritis and cerebro-splnal-men
tngltls." "Holy terrors! Where did be
get all that?" "Why, a man Induced
blm to buy a medical dictionary, and
he's Just beguu readlug It" Brooklyn
Citizen. s
" "X
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I I R I ""racism
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Whatever the plans
criminal prosecution of the central
figures In the great American Insur
ance scandal, it Is patent to all Paris,
writes a correspondent In the French
capital, that no fear Is entertained In
the mind of James Huzen Hyde, former
vice president of the Equitable Life
Assurance Society, or Richard A. Mc
Curdy, who was ousted from the pres
idency of the Mutual. For more than
a year now these two ostracized mill
ionaire votaries of high finance have
luxuriated In the distracting atmos
phere of Paris,
Hyde, who Is really better known In
Paris than he was at any time p ew
York, Is living an easy life. His most
serious effort at tW present time Is to
become known as the king of the Paris
Latin quarter. To this end Hyde, is
spending his money lavishly, and the
wide circle of Bohemian painters and
litterateurs, which he has gathered
nround him, regard him as their pa
tron saint.
Hyde lives In a beautiful and mam
moth mansion In Avenue Henri Martin.
In -the spacious salon of his beautlfif
home Hyde gives regular entertain
ments, which are the very acme of epi
curean splendor. His favorite pastime
Is to entertain large parties of his
giddy friends upon automobile excur-
NEW SWIMMING GLOVE.
A swimming glove to aid man In his
progress through the water Is a recent
Invention. It gives the swimmer the
assistance the duck derives from his
weblfed feet Greater speed and a great
er distance covered,'' with less, fatigue
than with the naked hands, are claimed
to be the advantages the wearer of this
glove will enjpy. It, flts rf tnu - hands
tightly and Is slipped! on In the ordinary
way. The webs are strojig .pieces of
cloth, running from,,llttle finger.' to
thumb. Every stroke of the swimmer Is
WEBBED BUBBEB MITTENS.
thus effective, the Increased area kof the
surface that strikes the water sending
him forward with the Increasing speed
that a boat driven by a paddle takes.
The woes of the beginner In the aquatic
sport are lessened ; the pleasure of the
expert Is Increased. Technical World.
Every time a woman gives a party
she Invites two or three that she really
wishes would decline. '
.
sions In the south of France and else
where. By these and other means Hyde
has at this time successively blotted
out, so far as Paris Is concerned, the
which followed
eonnec-
tlon with the Insurance revelations. He
is the hero of the impecunious horde
of long-haired youths of the boulevards.
Hyde participates fu'ly In the free and
easy life of the Latin quarter. -At the
last artists' ball, Hyde made a big hit
Impersonating an Arabian gypsy.
Recently Hyde has shown a tendency
to re-enter aristocratic French society,
and among the fashionables of Paris
his princely wine cellar 15 exciting won
der and admiration.
Richard A. McCurdy's existence In
Paris has been quite the opposite of
Hyde's, though It Is well Intended to
blot from the memory of the former
Mutual president the disagreeable ex
periences of a year and a half ago.
McCurdy's life In Paris has amounted
almost to (monastic retirement He Is
surrounded by an exclusive circle of
personal friends, and he Is devoting
himself to simple diversions which car
ry with them ho distasteful memories.
He Is never seen In the gay centers of
Paris, and he Is entirely unknown In
society. He reads ' no . newspapers.
When an effort was made to Interview
him he seut word that he would feel
keenly any further notoriety In connec
tion with the Insurance scandal. At
this time It Is learned from a personal
friend of McCurdy's that, while he Is
attempting In every possible, way to
eradicate memories of the scandal
which enmeshed him, be finds It diffi
cult to have any complete comfort In
his life.
James' W." Alexander, ousted presi
dent of the Equitable Life, who was a
third prominent figure In the Insur
ance scandals, Is on a trip around the
world with a party of friends.
SENTENCE TO PEISON SHIP,
One Declared to' Be l'anlly Enough
(or Worst of Sailors.
"The serving of one sentence aboard
a prison ship Is usually enough for the
worst of sailors," said L. H.. Dunlavy,
who. has Just concluded his term of
enlistment 1 the hospital corps of the
United States navy. . ' He served as
nurse for a time on board the United
States naval prison ship Southery at
Portsmouth, N. II.. . .
'"They have no cells on the ship,"
Dunlavy said. "The prisoners are lock
ed, at night In the forward and afteV
berj decks. They are compelled to
work, every day except Sunday In the
navyv yard. Sunday they, have to at
tend, religious services. They get rath
er to liking Sunday too. , , '
"It gives them a chance to let out
their voices when the hymns are be
ing sung. Their working hours are
from 6:30 to 11 o'clock In the morning
and from 1 to 4 o'clock In the after
noon. That Isn't all they have to do,
They are required to atteud a school,
The common branches only are taught
The recitations are held at night. From
0 to 7 o'clock at night Is the dally
study hour and they have to stiidy too,
"A marine guard of eighty; men 'po
lice' the ship and do sentry work over.
the prisoners while they nre at work,
Ordinarily there are about 250 prison
ers on the ship. Very few escape. Oc
casionally one tries to run by the sen
tries, but It's a big risk, for marines
carry rifles loaded with ball and have
orders to shoot any prisoner attempt
ing to get away." Kansas City Star.
If a man prefers chewing tobacco
to smoking, he always says chewing
isn't so Injurious to the health.
If any one gives you more than he
gets In return, rest assured It Is coun
terfeit
I
Dough Ralaer,
A heater especially Intended to raise
bread by means of the beat of a lamp
has been recently patented by a Wis
consin man. As
.shown In the Illus
trntion, the casing
Is of sheet, metal,
the' lower portion
haying openings
for 'the admission
of air. The casing
Is bottomless. A
partition havlngflu
opening In the cen
ter divides the ud-
UAKES BBEAD BISE. nD(j ,ower g.
tions, a lamp being placed below this
Opening when' the heater Is'ln use. Sup
ported above the opening Is a deflecting
cone, the point of the cone being directly
over tbe lamp. Near the top of the up
per nared section are -a number of
holes. The sides of the bread pan are
flared, the edges of the pn neatly rest-
ng and fitting on the edge of the cas
ing. The supposition Is that' .-the hot
air from the lamp rises and Is deflected
by the cone, so that It reaches the sides
of the bread pan and escapes through
the boles at the top, preventing excess
heat around the pan. The time saved
by the use of this heater will be In
stantly recognized. ,
Hashed Brown Potatoe.
lnere .are TWO Wflvn rt nmnnplnff
thnoA ...... I ... .1 i ,. , . .
- . . . .J V. . . I'll I 'll 1 U
iucctc. uuc nit-Lium is lu uasu mem in
cream sauce and bake in the oven. The
favorite way, however, for breakfast Is
to doii potatoes In their skins until
they are Just tender and no longer, peel
them and when cold chop very fine, sea
soning to taste with salt and pepper.
Put a little butter In a frying pan. and
when hot put In the hashed potatoes,
packing them down smoothly; then
place on the range, when they will cook
slowly for fifteen or twenty minutes.
Do not stir them. When a nice brown
color on the bottom and dry and floury
looking on top, they are done. .Fold
them over carefully, like an omelet,
turn out on a hot plate and garnish
with parsley and grilled tomatoes.
x Pear Parfaft.
The, most delicious of All pear des
serts Is a parfalt. Stir slowly Into the
well-beaten yolks of four eggs one cup
ful of sirup draiued from preserved
pears and cook It over hot water unMl
as thick as custard. Remove from the
fire and beat until cool. Fold In lijrht-
ly bne pint of cream which has been
whipped to a dry, stiff froth. Press
into a plain mold, cover tightly, pack
In Ice and salt, and let stand at least
three hours to ripen. Invert on a pret
ty glass or silver dish, when tim- to
serve and -garnish with a wreath of
whipped cream dotted with little
mounds of red currant Jelly.
Hickory IV at Dropa,
Mix one pound-of chopped hickory
nut meats, two cups of brown 'sugar.
two tablespoonfuls of butter, three eggs
beaten a separately 'and five .tablespoons
of flour with oue teaspoon of baking
powder sifted In. Drop in half tea-
spoonfuls (very thinly) to about the
size of a dollar on a buttered pdri and
bake In a moderate oven. Add the
hickory nuts last ".
Whole Wheat Bread.
One cup milk lukewarm), 31 cups
whole wheat flour, 2 cups white flour, 1
teaspoonful salt, 1 tablespoonful sugar,
three-qpuarfers tablespoonful molasses,
one-half cake yeast "Beat half hour;
do not knead. Set' to rise until It dou
bles In size; beat again and put In
greased tin ; let rise until It doubles In
size again; bake- in moderate oven
three-quarters of an hour.. .
Clam Shortcake.
Sift three cups of flour, two teaspoons
of baking powder, one teaspoon of
sugar and one-half teaspoon of salt
orit iu iwo lauiespoous uuner witn
the tips of the fingers. Add enough
milk to make a soft dough. Bake In a
quick oven. Split, butter while hot and
serve with clam filling. .
. ' Vanilla Sance,
Moisten two tablespoonfuls of corn
starch with a little water and add one
half cup sugar. ' Place on stove and
add one pint boiling water, stirring
constantly. Remove from stove, nnd
when nearly cold add two well-beaten
eggs and two tablespoonfuls vanilla ex
tract ,. To Remove Splaahe of Paint.
The unsightly splashes of oil paint,
which are liable to come on window
panes' during painting operations and
which are very difficult to remove, will
disappear when treated with black
soap; turpentlle oil and soda are not
sufficient
BLIND MAN WILL BE SENATOR.'
The Democrats of Oklahoma have' se
lected as one of the United States Sen
ators to represent Oklahoma, Thomas'
P. Gore, of Lawton, who Is totally
blind. 'Ills nomination Is equal to an
election. This Is the first time iu the
history of the. United States that a
blind man has eyer been sent to the
Senate, as Mr. Gore will be when state
hood Is accomplished under the present
proposed constitution.
Mr. Gore has been 1 politics all his
life,, beginning as a page in the Mis
sissippi ' Senate when he-was but 11
, '
THOMAS P. GORE.
years old. It was during that time that
he lost his eyesight by 'an accident
with an arrow gun. Three years pre
Ivously he had lost his left eye, a play
mate, In a moment of passion, striking
him with a stone. "
Mr. Gore is but 36 years of age. He
lives at Lawton, has a wife and four
children, and is a - lawyer by profes
sion. His memory Is a wonder. When
his father prepared to send him to a
blind school, he refused to go, saying
that schools for the blind did not fur
nish him the hooka and opportunity he
desired. So he went to the public
schools and college, getting through by
reason of his acute memory.
Watery Eyes. Relief may be obtain
ed by bathing the eyes several times a
. day with a wash consisting of ten
'grains of pure borax and two ounces
! of camphor water.
Rheumatic Knee. Try salicylate of
soda, five drams ; Cincture of nux vom
ica, three drams, and essence of pepsin
enough to make four ounces. The dose
for an adult Is one teaspoonful every
two or three hours.
Superfluous Hair. A growth of hair
Is annoying to a girl who wears short
sleeves. Depilatories are dangerous and
electrolysis, the only sure cure, Is an
expensive treatment To minimize the
trouble dark hairs may be bleached.
Wash the arms with a weak solution of
ammonia and water. Then pour a lit
tle peroxide! of hydrogen In the water
and apply- with a piece of linen. The
bleaching process will have to be re
peated from' time to time, but peroxide
Is harmless to the skin.
Nasal Catarrh. In the treatment of
this persistent and often Intractable dis
order, good results .have been obtained
by the internal' administration five or
six times each day of one-half teaspoon- .
ful doses In one-half ounce of water of
a mixture of one ounce of specific echin
acea and two ounces of stllllngla. The
latter Intensifies the action of echina
cea In Its Influence upon , the mucous
surfaces. Tincture of gelsenilum, two 1
drops' eveVy hour during the day,push
ed to a physiological point, will abort a
catarrhal, cold: Three grains of salicy
late of strontium, added to each dose, ,
reinforces It If rheumatism Is suspected.
Neuralgia. If the neuralgia is In the .,
right side of the face the left band
should be placed In a basin of water as
hot as can be born ; or if neuralgia Is
In the left side of the face, then the ,
right hand should be placed In the hot
water. It Is asserted that In this way
relief may be obtained In less than five
minutes. The two nerves which have
tha crroaffMit nn.iiK n ..it i j i
are the fifth and the medium nerve.
As the fibers of these two nerves cross
any Impulse conveyed to the left hand
will affect the right side of the face,
or If applied to the right, hand will
affect the left aide of the face. This
Is on. account of the crossing of the
cords. .
Other people'a happiness gives a pea
wmlst a headache.
1 ll 'H