LINCOLN COIM LEADER
Cr.SOUU.Pitblblrar
TOLEDO..
.OREGON
There's no denying that aa a conver
Mtional topic .the trial marriage is a
lure success.
People who need the advertising now
merely have to offer Count Bonl a Job
at a liberal salary.
That dentist who has been robbed
four times in three years should here
after go armed to the teeth.
George Bernard Shaw doesn't think
much of the Ten Commandments, but
it is too late now to change them.
If Kipling's critics don't soon stop
he will be Justified In once more writ
ing something that Is worth reading.
Fortunately for Eve, she Is spared
the pain of knowing that her diary has
been excluded from the shelves of the
Worcester public library.
A German singer committed suicide
because a married American woman
wouldn't marry him. Probably her
husband wouldn't let her.
These long evenings are being bright
ened and made profitable by the game
of guessing what Mrs. Sage is really
going to do with her money.
philosophy, for six years a lecturer on
sociology in Barnard College, daughter
of a rich banker and wife of a Con
gressman, proposes this "startling re
form" In a book, "The Family," Just Is
sued. "Trial marriage" certainly Bounds
sensational. But as prosulc matter of
fact, the commonness, cheapness and
respectability of divorce has rendered
all marriage "trial marriage." "It is
difficult to Imagine greater facility in
the annulment of marriage than now
obtains in most of the States. No
"reform" is necessary to bring about
precisely the condition, In effect, which
Mrs. Parsons proposes. The reform is
needed in the other direction. We
need to get rid of the feeling that mar
riage Is a mere experiment Of course,
all couples at the time of marriage
expect to live happily ever after. Trial
marriage could mean nothing to them
at that time. People who do not feel,
for the time at least, that they can
take each other for life need no "trial"
to prove they are not fitted. The ab
sence of offspring during "trial" would
be a powerful cause of failure In many
marriages that might otherwise have
been successful. But that would be
nothing new. It Is the case now and
always has been. Until there are chil
dren to tie the heartstrings together
there is no real trial of marriage. We
are too apt to forget that most of the
laws which operate toward successful
marriage are provided by Nature.
Human statutes provide for failure
and, alas i there are too many of them
already.
The Cuban army is reported to be
getting restless again. Why not quiet
that army for all time by setting up a
free soup kitchen for it somewhere?
Let us have politics without preju
dice, without selfishness, without graft,
etc., pleads an exchange. And while
we are at It, let us have the millennium.
There are times when it becomes a
matter of wonder bow this country has
been able to grow so big and prosper
ous without taking the advice of the
cojlege professors. .
Kind-hearted housewives should be
warned that It is toq early to feed
every tramp that calls at the back
door with the plea that he is a poor
Standard Oil magnate out of a Job.
There con be no further doubt that
Mr Harriman is of the opinion that
much greater ability Is required to run
the railroads of this country than Is
needed to successfully run the country
Itself.
A negro was arrested, tried, convict
ed and executed, all within a space of
two hours, in Texas a few days ago.
Surely they can't bring up the law's
delays as an excuse for lynching after
this. '
Persons who, may have felt like ask
ing Mrs. Russell Sage for enough mon
ey to, get a start in life will do much
better by saving the price of the post
age stamp and maklug it the nucleus of
a bank account
The one hundredth anniversary of
the birth of Henry Wadsworth Long'
fellow is to be celebrated by the Cam
bridge Historical Society. A special
bronze medal will be Issued in honor
of ' the event copies of which it is
hoped will be preserved In libraries
end museums. Longfellow wrote many
lines which will be preserved In the
popular heart longer than the bronze
will last This is one of the reasons
for celebrating the anniversary of his
Most people have their weak spots,
Few are roundly normal. Some slap
their friends on the back, some whistle
in public places, some keep barking
dogs, some speak monologues and think
they are "conversing" and so on, but
there is some hope for a tendency or a
habit that Is not deliberately designed
to be mischievous, such as the playing
of pranks on newly married people,
These Jocular outbreaks have under
gone various "refinements" and they
have now reached the point where a
honeymoon voyage has been anticipated
by a "bill, of particulars" printed In
circular form and distributed among
the passengers of the ocean liner. The
discouraging thing is that the propen
alty does not "refine" Itself out of ex
Istence. It is, generally speaking, as
perverse in its latter day manifesta
tions as It was when the uncouth but
equally well-meaning country folks sur
rounded the house of the bashful bride
and groom on their wedding night and
made the time hideous with the beating
of pans and old copper boilers with
what was called a "belling."
The coroner who investigated the
wreck on the Baltimore and Ohio rail
road near Woodvllle, Ind., In which
sixty-one lives were lost, made a report
in which he fixes the blame In the
most positive manner. He finds that
the engineer of the first section of the
passenger train did not properly give
the required signals and note the re
sponses to them. Consequently he Is to
be held to the grand Jury for man
slaughter. But beyond that the system
by which the road was operated provid
ed no check for any such Individual
neglect as that of which the engineer
was guilty, and consequently part of
the blame was placed by the coroner
upon the road Itself. There was a
time when it would have been unrea
sonable to ask railroads to Install elab
orate systems for the safeguarding of
their trains, because the traffic was too
light to Justify the financial burden,
and so light Indeed that the evil was
not great. In those days when a wreck
of this character occurred all the blame
was properly to be attributed to the
guilty employe. Now, on many of the
roads which do the heaviest business,
the burden has shifted so that It ,1s a
question whether the employe Immedi
ately at fault Is more to blame or
whether the greatest responsibility
falls upon his superiors who left the
door open to his carelessness. Before
long a time will come when the great
weight of the burden will be trans
ferred to the shoulders of the railway
administration, If Indeed that time has
not come already. It is purely a ques
tion of danger versus cash. The meth
ods of making such accidents as that
at Woodvllle impossible are well
known. Some form of the block sys
tem, especially the form which uses the
"staff" as an entrance key to each
block, would reduce the ordinary em
ploye's fallibility to a minimum. The
Woodvllle accident is simply one more
reason or, better said, it Is sixty-one
more reasons why the railroad com
panies should be required to spend the
dollars which will save the lives.
"It would therefore seem well, from
this point of view, to encourage early
trial marrlRge, the relation to be en
tered into with a view to permanency,
but with the privilege of breaking it it
;roved unsuccessful, and, In the absence
of offaprlng, without suffering any
great degree of public condemnation."
Roland for His Oliver.
In a suit recently tried in a Virginia
town a young lawyer of limited experi
ence was addressing the Jury on a
point of law when good naturedly he
turned to opposing counsel, a man of
much more experience than himself,
and asked:
"That's right, I believe, Colonel Hop
kins?" Whereupon Hopkins, with a smile of
conscious superiority, replied:
"Sir, I have an office In Richmond
wherein I shall be delighted . to en
lighten you on any point of law for a
consideration."
The youthful attorney, not In the
least abashed, took from his pocket a
half-dollar piece, which be offered
Colonel Hopkins with this remark:
"No time like the present Take
this, sir, tell us what you know and
give me the change." Harper's Week
ly.
6 ?' A- i
V
WHY MARRIAGE IS TEE GREAT LOTTERY.
By Helen Old field.
Marriage essentially Is a partnership, the
closest possible association known to human
ity, and as such necessarily implies commu
nity of Interest between man and wife. In all
legendary myth woman is said to have been
created as mate for man; and In Genesis we
are told that the Lord God, saying "Is is not
good for man to be alone," made Eve as "an
helpmeet for him." "And they twain shall be
one flesh;" the halves of one harmonious whole. For
which cause no marriage can be a happy one In which
there is not complete and thorough sympathy between
the two who are Joined in the "holy estate."
It Is cause for wonder that so many marriages turn out
well, rather than that some are failures, when one re
flects how often a young girl stands at the altar to utter
the words which bind her for better or worse, for good
or evil, with only the most superficial knowledge, If any,
of her husband's past ; of his real character ; his true dis
position. If only women knew men as men know men,
and If men knew women as women know women, there
might be fewer weddings, but marriage would cease to
be a lottery, and be a pleasant game in which all prizes
and no absolute blanks would be the rule.
BEWARE OF FIRST STEP ON DOWN GRADE.
By E. O. Mlnalck.
Tb "down pmrte" wems to me to be nn apt
expression. It means an unsuspected slipping
down the hill in life. I Imagine that there
are few people who have not bad a little ex
perience of it Millions get upon the down
grade, and slide far enough to find themselves
in awkward and uncomfortable positions as
more or less failures In life.
The "down grade" to unhappiness in the
home is found by thousands. Bluebeard,-1 expect com
menced his course gradually, and I dare say that he nev
er realized that be was not a husband of a tender dispo
sition. As to extravagant wives, I have known a woman
who managed once on a time to keep house comfortably
on $750 a year bring ruin to her husband's head when
bis Income was $5,000, all through not being able "to
make ends meet," and who could never believe that she
was extravagant
An occasional hour or so of self-questioning would
lead to some wonderful revelations of the most useful
character to most people. It would save them also from
a great deal, and afford them many hints aa to the best
course to pursue for success In life. Many people have
a dread of being "Impertinent" to themselves. They re
mind me of the man Mark Twain described, who would
never look at himself in a looking glass without he had
kid gloves on.
BACHELORS ARE ABNORMALITIES.
By Benjamin Ide Wheeler
In the long run, .what upholds the family
will uphold the state. The state cannot ex
ist without the home. If the home is left
out none 'of that solid moral fiber can exist
in the nation which must come from home vir
tues. Good morals are nothing less than the
regularities and the ordinaries of social life
between morals and religion. There can be
no dividing line. Good morals are a constit
uent part of life.
Individualism is danger to the state. Bachelors and
club men are the bandits, guerrillas and outcasts. I
would be in favor, if it were possible to do such things
by law, of a special tax upon bachelors. They don't take
part in the moral work of society. They are abnormali
ties, and abnormalities should pay the taxes. The unit
of society and the state is the family. Beware of the
doctrines which base themselves upon false conceptions
of Individualism Instead of the family, which is the
only social unit
"NO WOMAN POLITICIANS."
By Pope Plus X
The church blesses every movement tending
to raise the intellectual and social level of
humanity. We ought all to work, and why
should not women do their part? They should
study everything, with, of course, the excep
tion of theology. They should become law
yers, doctors and teachers. The care of the
poor is in all its forms a woman's calling
above alL What Is the exercise of Christian
charity except maternity In the widest sense of the word?
Women in Parllameat ! The idea is preposterous. Men
there make blunders sufficient At most, women can exer
cise as Indirect Influence on politics in urging their male
kindred to vote arlgnt But, before all, they should bring
up their children in the consciousness of their civic du
ties. But let us have no women politicians !
TWO GODS.
A boy was born 'mid little things,
Between a little world and sky
And dreamed not of the cosmic rings
Round which the circling planets fly.
He lived in little works and thoughts,
Where little ventures grow and plod,
And paced and ploughed his little plots,
And prayed unto his little God.
But as the mighty system grew,
His faith grew faint with many scars ;
The Cosmos widened in nil view
But God was lost among his stars.
Another boy In lowly days,
As he, to little things was born,
But gathered lore in woodland ways,
And from the glory of the morn. .
As wider skies broke on his view,
God greatened in his growing mind;
Each year he dreamed his God anew,
And left his older God behind. '.
i
He saw the boundless scheme dilate,
In star and blossom, sky and clod;
And as the universe grew great
He saw in it a greater God.
New England Magazine.
Then he sat down and thought It
erfer.
Next morning Mrs. Ames heard an
awful crash In Billy's room, and ran to
see what was the matter.
"Here!" he gasped. "Telegram fath
er better coming to see wife Ellen la
country!" He rushed to the window.
"Father here now. Getting out of car
riage! Mrs. Ames, you have got to be
my wife !"
"I couldn't!" she exclaimed.
"You've got to!" Insisted Billy, and as
he spoke, his father entered.
Mrs. Ames hadn't been kissed co.
thoroughly for years. The old gentle
man bubbled with Joy over his son's
acquisition.
"What made you 'marry so quickly?"
he demanded.
"Now, father," blurted Billy, "we
haven't a minute. Run, dear, and get
ready for the train. One moment
I'll go with you. Excuse me a moment,
father?" and Billy leaped after Mrs.
Ames to Induce her to keep it up.
No sooner had they gone out of the
room before a gentleman entered, In
army dress.
"Looking for my wife," he said.
pleasantly. "Little surprise for her
oh, I beg your pardon!" This to a
they hid themselves obediently, as Bil
ly returned with his rather unwilling
bride.
It was an astonishing tableau that
greeted Billy a momenj: later, when he
saw Ellen returned tq the city, and a
rather upset officer who called himself
Captain Ames, so, as there was nothing:
else to do, he owned up.
"What a boy!" cried Mr. Blake.
"Well, we'll forgive you, eh, Captain
Ames? Billy, here's your wedding pres
ent with this stipulation the first youv
spend of It must go for a dinner for ns
all, Including "
"His wife for five minutes !" laughed
Mrs. Ames. Kansas City World.
His Wife $
For Five Minutes
Aromatic Petit Larceny.
"I hope you notice how sweet I am,"
smiled the girl when they were out on
the street again. "While the man was
wrapping up the toothbrush I was try
ing all the perfume on the counter. He
looked at me awfully hard."
"I should think lie would have had
you arrested," remarked her companion
severely. "What If everybody tried
all the perfumes like that? How much
would he have left to sell?" New York
Press.
Every woman takes aa much time la
getting off a street car as If she
thought her destination was aa far aa
-lira, Elsie Clews Parsons, a doctor of , the car expected to go.
944444444444444444444444
IT I X , . , I 1 1 . 1
q) sat looaing aisconsoiaieiy
O) out upon the chimney tops.
"I never dreamed I co,uld owe
so much money !" he groaned. "I guess
I owe all there Is in the world $1,500 !
Here I'm engaged to Ellen, and the old
gentleman writes he will give me $5,000
the day we are married, and I shall be
dead of starvation or in Jail, one or
the other, long before that And Ellen's
gone to the country, and oh, hang It!"
"Morning, Mr. Billy!" cries Mrs.
Ames, a pretty little wqman who lived
in the next room, her army husband
having been sent to some particularly
Inhospitable country. "Why, you look
real comfortable and miserable."
Whereupon Billy told her all about It.
adding that his father had written hlra
he was confined to home with the gout.
"So he's sure to be In a bad humor,"
he added. .
"Nonsense," laughed Mrs. Ames.' "If
you had that $5,000 you could pay all
your debts and have money over,
couldn't you? Listen!" She was open
ing the door to go out "You are already
married married this morning. Think
It over," and she was gone.
Did he dare? He must! It seemed
reasonable. Ills father could not como
to the city. He would risk It
"Dear Father," he wrote. "Circum
stances In my wife's family made it nec
essary, so we were married this morn
lng, and leave for our honeymoon to-
I morrow. Please send check. Billy."
ffli r "711
"TELEGRAM FATHEB COMING."
very pretty girl who was standing in
the hall, a puzzled look on her face.
"I am looking for Billy Blake," she
said.
"That's my son,' said the old gentle
man, "We are engaged," said the girl, ap
proaching him confidently.
"Engaged ! Bless my soul ! Why,
Billy's " ' There came a sound of
voices approaching, and an Inspiration
dawned on Mr. Blake. "Here behind
the door, both of you," he ordered, and
INVENTING FOR THE INVENTOR.
T. A. Edlaon Learn How He Hade
Great Discovery.
In a certain New York State factory
given over to the manufacturing of
electrical appliances visitors are of
dally occurrence and guides a necessi
ty, says Lipplncotts. A guide named
Steve took such pride In the work that
If surprise and enthusiasm did not al
ways respond to his personally con
ducted tours he would promptly Im
agine various things, to awaken what
he believed to be the proper emotions.
One day, with an unusually undemon
strative man In- tow a man seeming
ly not even Interested iu the "features"'
shown him, while he paid close atten
tion to details of apparent insignifi
cance Steve began on the subject of
the Incandescent light.
"It was discovered purely by acci
dent," said he. "Mr. Edison says him
self that he would never have thought
of the thing If he hadn't seen soma
lightning playing around a fork that
had been left In an empty pickle bot
tle." The visitor looked up rather oddly
at this Information, but still so quietly
that Steve, to cap his climax, added:
"And so was born that boon to all
mankind, the Incandescent light"
, At tBat Instant a passing employe
caught sight of the visitor and, com
ing up to him with hand outstretched,
exclaimed: "If it Isn't my old boss I
How are you, Mr. Edison?"
Steve sat down on the first object
handy and, with his head in bis hands,
tried to recall what he had said and
think quickly of some way out When
he looked up the "Wizard of Menlo
Park" had departed, undoubtedly wis
er than when he began his tour round
the factory, but also undoubtedly con
siderate of Steve. And a fortnight
later that gentleman received from
West Orange a book on electrical sci
ence, "written down" to Juvenile read
ers, and on the fly-leaf, beneath a
sketch of a fork in an empty bottle,
were written these words:
"And so was born that boon to all
mankind, the Incandescent light!"
A child's first Impression is usually
made by the paternal slipper.