" THE COOS BAY TIMES, MARSHFIELD, OREGON, FRIDAYS AY 12, 1916.-EVENING EDITION
THREE
The Central Avenue Booster
sou 1-
CENTRAL AVENUE, KltlDAV, MAY 111, JUKI.
No. 87.
..y JSEJIAUKS OK THE WAT-
( Political ) N i
. . -! mi' John Kondull fa-
' i iii' City ov Hamlon with n
" ' .... . ...ii fh' naiiio show on
' iTMOTlirtoM tomorrow night. To
' 0ut Marshtlohl would show
1C ..... ..nriiaiitv iii thulr own
loo mil i -
! Le town, an Unndon would sot
I ,, a holler at boln' the only to.vn
ttnng.
jack Kcmlnll wuz down Hi rlvor
... ! lit' Itit fiiiuV i t
Ih' other ay l" "" "
IU campaign, an' got mistook for
H' deputy collector ov customs,
djln' to a slight similarity ,ov
Mme3. mi' when Jack tried to toll
em ho wuxn't th' biuhu follor, limy
told nlm lyln" wouldn't help him
i cut none.
Charlie Lash says It ilila horo
Bodera music that sounds, llko Ohl
rem nn' Injun gits a hold on th
tuWIc, It will bust, up his mulo
nmrtct. an demands that th var
ious candidates toll th' public how
tity stand on this Important uuos-
tlon.
Uocllgloua)
Xcw tliTit llrnco Evans haa got ns
filv away 113 North llond, church
members kin lesunio thulr danclu
'lliout their louscioncos klckln' up
so lively on 'cm.
(Mineral)
Krod Wilson saya ho'a pot th'
only kind ov a nii.tomohlle in lowi
thin don't mako a teller fool llko
hit frlcnds'll git aoro on him It ho
don't 3top an' pick '0111 up.
Ulll Chandler says anybody could
lull .Mnrshfield wit, a dry town by
Jest loolcln' in tho Window at th
Cnandler hotel. Th fellcra loafln'
lu th' lobby set still so Ion,.
I read about a holul boln' robbed
nt Itoodsport this week, l'vo heard
ov lots ov robberies occurrln' fn
hotolj, but this Is th' first tlmo I
knowed ov th' loss fnllln' on th'
hotel.
Criminal libel's llku any other
kind ov sport, you hov to pay fer
it.
It wuz so cold ono day this wcok
that Councilman Emll Ilnndcl purty
near had to wear a coat tltirln th'
latter pnrt ov th day.
,THE OENTRAL AVENUE KOOSTKIt
. ,
Published Kvcry Friday In the Inter-
cslfl of Coot llnj in General nnd
Central Atciiiio lu particular.
Entered at tho I'ostofflco as strictly
Hrst-Clnss matter; thoro la nothing
Second-Class about Central Avcnuo.
Subscription Price. Your good will,
and membership In tho Doostor Club
0
orit platkohm.
Ono Street, One Flag, Ono Country,
.. ..and Ono Wife nt n tlmo
ouii delusion.
To Uo flood.
OUIt POLITICS.
More Unslnecs.
Special This Week Only
OXIjV two davs .moke
, Willi each ."lie worth of Kodak Finishing mitl ICnlircglng, Wo
Will (Ho KlthE Ono elmiieo m tho lirnuttfiil Jljrtlo Wood
I'licsl. ' our Wlmluw.
Ony a feu numbers left.
REFJFELD'S
22(1 (V11I111I Ae. Phono U7.1-.I
Messa
geof
The Best People in. Marshfleld get The Best Groceries
at the Best Store.
For Saturday wc are offering an especially large line
of
CHOICE FRESH VEGETABLES
Everything crisp and choic for the Sunday dinner.
Wc also carry a complete line of picnic and luncheon
floods that you should not overlook when purchasing
your supplies.
Remember wc carry the Famous Holsum and Tip
Top Bread. The Clean Sanitary Kind.
You will be better pleased by trading at the
Samtarv Food Store
SERVICE FIRST
1'iioxn 21a
(Formerly Xnsluirg'o Grocery.)
SECOND AND CENTHAL
THE .JUNE SCHOOL EJECTION
ON JUNE jyth will occur tho
annual Marshfleld school elec
tion. This la a very Import
ant olcctlon, nnd Is always pulled off
on schedule- wlicnovor a quorum of
voters can bo rounded up.
Tho usual program Is nhout as
follows: Matt Stonliolm goes Into
tho Central School about 7:110 mid,
rings tho bell. A lltllo later J ml go"
Hall and tho three school directors
clump lu, Superintendent Tledgen
arriving about tho sanio time. Then
they sit nround wnltlng for tho
voters to bogln to ajsoinblo. About
eight o'clock Judgo Hall goes up
htiilrs to tho tolcphoiio and calla up
a dozen or so good cltlcns, lu or
der to obtain a quorum ot seven, as
required by law.
j Thus a grateful public pays Its
It llnito to the solf sacrificing work
or throe directors who servo with
out pay, and an underpaid clerk.
Also tho public discharges, In tho
same hearty mnnner, Us duty to It
self In scolng Hint tho right kind ol
men are always oloctnd to office.
It any ono wants to put lu a
dark home, all ho I1M3 to do Is to
tip off to about n dozen peoplo on
tho qulot what Is up. Out of this
uumhor uo inoro than eight or Kino
persona need to romombor tho dato
and bo thoro lu ordor to elect any
one they may Iibvo In mind.
Thus the public allows Its rchuKo
or approval, aa tho caso may be, to
fall upon tho policy of tho school
board by tho voice of a handful.
The puoplo learn about tho election
next dny, when tho result lj pub
lished In tho papers. All tho
frlonds of tho defentod candidate
(If thoro Is a contest nt all) toll
him thoy aro sorry, nnd ho fools
that thoy aro vory good to him.
Tho Doostor haa no candidate It
la not Its provlnco to enter Into
controvoray. All that stuff Is left
to tho editor, who rosorvoa to him
self tho most Important Bpaco In tho
paper, right under tho subscription
rates.
Hut tho Doostor would like to sco
tho public take moro of an 1 11 to rust
lu au election which Is aoeond lu
Important to no local election. If
tho policy ot tho present Bchool
board Is satisfactory to tho majori
ty, tho majority would rind It to Its
Interest to say so at tho polls, and
retain the prosout hoard. If It 13
not, It Is equally Important that no
mlstako bo made In olecting other
men to tho office. Wo don't say
such mlutukos liuvo boon mado lu
tho past. Hut thoy might 'bo, and
they could havo boon, any tlmo, for
all tho Intoroit tho public has dis
played. Tho Doostor trloa to bo nil its
uamo Impllos, and It would bo tick
led almost to death If n real, rop
rcsentatlvo voto could drag Itself
out nt tho next school election.
Lets mako a real tlmo of it, like
they do lu Portland.
I
! CEXTUAL A VS. SAVINGS
.lack Kendall would rather bo a
live Republican than a dead Moos
or. What Arthur K. Peck Isn't learn
ing about, politics, Isn't.
Although Frank Cohan knows a
lot of thlngj about vines and roses
and Is assiduously cultivating a
small tract of ground on West Cen
tral Avonuo, ho has never been
able to grow a cabbage that will
make good Jelly.
As yet tho dog pound hasn't been
located lu Don Cbandler'a back
yard.
Although some tlmo off Al Noff
haa started to put away a row dol
lars each wcok for Christinas.
Never In hla llfo has Hoy Law
Iiorno boon so 111 that ho couldn't
glvo the high sign.
Don Klslior Is willing to bo Pres
ident, or Governor or Senator or
Congressman or Cnnslnblo or Po
lice Judge or 'urdon of tho Pon or
Sheriff or Cashier of a Natloual
Dank. Ho says so himself.
Kalph Mntson Is all tho time
making rush promises but he never
comes to bat. Tho only time In
hi j llfo ho waa real near to a wed
ding was whon Peto Duo got mar
ried the other night. If italph
keeps up his present gait, ho will
fooii bo known among his fair
friends aa a piker.
Tho plcturos printed on green
backs greatly Interest John Kergu
son, hut Frank Cohan aaya they
look like moving pictures to him
thoy move so fast after ho sens
them.
Just now the name of Krod Kid.
Icy Is almost as ' well known 011
Central avonuo as Harry McKeowu.
Of nil tho peoplo Doe Hoiuoworl'i
hates n hot-air merchant takes tho
prize.
While J. T. liirrrlgan has been
out campaigning this week Seng
Btnrkon has heon circulating stories
about Gorman victories. Neutral
f 1 lends any that It is taking n menu
advantage of u complicated situa
tion. JL.
Central avonuo wnn to tho front
again this wock with n ' midnight
marriage. You havo to stay up
pretty late as well as got up early
to got ahead of Central Avonuo.
It takes a mighty smooth guy to
put ono over on I.em Schmltz. Dut
onco - oh, we etui keep n
secret. f
W. J. Conrad wishes thoy could
change tho color of orange pcol.
A. Y. Myers Is taking a corrw
pondonco course lu wireless tolo
rnphy. Jake Hllletrom will bo mlnsed on
Central Avonuo nlllio Tho Doosler
hopo3 his first contract will ho ic
palrlngvtho western section of Cen
tral. S.M I I.E-A-WH I I.U
O.N THE POWEDS LINE
, ii v ECENTY n passenger leaving i
I l-c Powers nt 0.10 a. in. on the
. Portlnnd-bound train waa so
! struck with tho luxury of tho
new railroad equipment, compared
I with tho old rolling stock, that ho
! committed this, the first poetic of
fense of a fnlrly normal llfo:
There's a difference you'll be
finding,
When you ride upon tho winding,
Hulling, humpliiK ballast of tho C.
D. It. & E.
Thoro Is Just as great a pound-
l"K,
Tho so much of its not 'sounding,
Whon the enr has got the label of
the old S. P.
Tho soaU are green and led
plush
And Kardoll Is on a dead rush
To get you through to lteedsport,
whero Eva waits for lilm.
Not so ninny springs aro broken
And tno woodwork onco was oak
en; The lamps, tho highly polished, arc
In tunncla for lovo dim.
There's a "Ladles" and a "Gents"
too,
Which don't even ralso tho rents
due;
And you'll seu it little stove at both
ends of the car. I
The engine's awful funny,
Tho It hcoius quite aa "runny"
As tho ones which didn't spread
lliolr funnels near so far. ,
Don't think I would bo mocking
For Its far ahead of walking. !
Under weight of heavy grlpa along
the roaring atrnm; 1
And while we let this gn3 go, . I
Wo rejoice that Cornwall's Gasgo
No longer has to bear us four hoiira
to Jarvta' sand.
SMILE-A-WIIILE
TAKES CHANCES I
"Sir, I wish to make your daug(i-
tor my wife," said the young man.
The old limit hesitated. "Hadn't!
you better 300 hor mother first?",
ho naked gently, thinking a moment.
"l'vo Beep her mother, nnJ It!
doesn't make any difference. I'll
tnku tho chances." I
SMILE-A-WIIILE
Said Arthur llnliies, "I often won-,
dor why
So many klckoia In llfo'a path
wo meet."
Ltuu Schmidt replied, "I never
, could make out,
! I'nless its Just bocauso thoy have
cold feet."
I CENTHAL AVENUE JOTTINGS
Succosvful OiH-iiliig. George An
Ickor had an awful rush nt Ills grand
opening Wednesday evening. Georgo
says the Idea worked out so well
Hint he Is thinking of having n grand
opening ednesday evening. George
Uoub Lyons playing the clarinet
mado n very ottructlvo window dis
play. 8MILE-A-WIIILE
Can' Gel tVcd to It. Ever since
they began to patch up the pavement
at Fourth and Central residents of
West Marshfleld 'have been doing
rcguinr Charles Chnplln stunts reach
ing for the holes from force of habit
ami not finding thorn there. Four
teen fell down Inst evening.
SMIL1MA-WIIILE
Mllil lly Comparison. Deputy
Sheriff Laird bits been hnving some
hard trips up the country serving pn
pars 011 fanners, diut ho says he'd
lots rather do it than try to round up
a bunch of Marshfleld women to
testify bofore a grand Jury. That's
hnrder yet.
BJUIE-A-W1 1 1 M5
1MVOIUTK QUOTATIONS
(Colby Perry's who doesn't like
music.)
"If you have nny music that may
not bo heard, go to't."
(Sliakespearo)
SMILE-A-WIIILK
That Kinney property's a tangled
mess.
We wonder If tiey'U over got It
straight.
Sometimes we hope, and other
tlmea wo think
Perhaps Its Just another caso ot
-SMlLE-a-WHILE-
ItOSISllUHG Dr. F. D. Strieker
ot Grntits Pass was clcctod president
and Dr. A. C. Sooloy ot llosoburg w.ta
elected secretary nnd treasurer of
tho Southern Oregon Medical Associa
tion In session In tho city.
UNUSUAL DELAV
Cheer Up!
Though HilngH did not go right ullh
JOII
Today my mmi do not feel blue.
Cheer up, nnd when you lilt the hay
Tonight, Just miiIIo mid Miy
"Tomoriinv Is another day."
And I run get nil El Itiillnii In light
my Hay."
THE IIEST CIGAHS
THE I J EST DILLIAIIDS
THE IIEST UASEHALIi
nt
1 fits
Smokehouse
"TliiilV the Place"
III I ' '' '
1 VVVBHHBBM ,
rnxmrn M W
'GRAVEL
We are now prepared to furnish GRAVEL In nny lumtltlei
from Pile In our yard or In carload lots, at following prices:
om pile on ground, $2.?6 per yard.
' Canoad lota, taken from cars, 12.00 per yard,
notall Department.
C A. Smith Lumber & Mfg. Co.
vppoilto Fos-OMlei).
Fhot ISO.
Get
Kodak
Films
"Ho tried to kiss 1110 tho second
tlmo ho waa with mo," said a Cen
tral Avonuo girl yostorday of a
I young man under dlseuaslou.
"What", asked Harry Goidou,
who was present, "what waa tho
reason for tho delay?"
SMILE-A-WJIILC
nt
Oregon's Greatest Fishing Resort
Ten Mile Lake
VOU can find all the modem conven-
iences and comforts at the TEN
MILE HOTEL
E. SMITH, Mgr. Lakeside, Oregon
! the 1
THE KODK STOItE B
I The Central Ave. I
I Drug Store I
DHOWNSVILLE Gladys Leo, 11
1 domostlc lu the homo of Charles
Troutmau, was fatally buruod whon
fire destroyed tho house.
DK, W. A. TOVE,
t DENTIST
; Hours 9 to 12; 1 to 5.
Itociiu ()!, Irving Itldg.
Central Avenue. Marshfleld
FRECKLES
j Dou'n Hide Th1 111 With n Veil; He-
mom Tlifin Willi lllc. Otlilno Pro-
M'l'll(loil
This proscription for the rotuoval
of freckles was written by a promi
nent physician and la usually co suc
cessful lu roiuovlng freckles and giv
ing a cloar, beautiful complexion that
It l sold by any druggist under guar
antee to rotund tho nioiioy It It fails.
Don't lildo your freckles under u'
veil; get an ounce of otlilno and ro
movo them. Even tho first few ap
plications should show a wonderful
Improvement, somo of the lighter
freckles vanishing entirely.
De suro to ask tho druggist for tho
double strength otlilno; It Is this that
la sold 011 the money-back guarantee.
A FITTING CLIMAX to a good din
ner is- so satisfying to a particular
hostess. Take home a brick of Orange
Parfait or Princess for your Sunday dinner
ANICKER.'S
Formerly Stafford's Central Avenue
Remington Typewriters
and Supplies
Service (lint Mil Mies. Atuiiy on (ho Job to make good nnd
JnliM (hat make good nnd iimi'liliics that more than make good
That's Jacobs and .IiicoIin (hat's me. Iot. me show you.
L. Wo JACOBS
7!l Central Avenue. Ilinno -.ID-J.
SoiithucMeiii Oregon Iteprcsentittlro for The Dictaphone
RANCHERS ATTENTION
USE'S SANITAIIV DAIItV PAILS Soldciod Insldo and out
side. Chin us and Separators everything you need fruui a tin
cup to a pilch fork. Ami everything at reasonable prices and n
guarantee goes with ever) thing uo sell.
Marshfield Hardware Co.
ilromlwny nnd Central Avenue. Phono 111
DEW DROP INN at Sailer's
AND TItV A DLACK EVED Sl'SAN SPECIAL
IOII ICE CHEAM OK OCALITV ALL THE TIME TItV SAUTEIIH
SARTEK'S DEW DROP HNN
Central Avenue Don't Forget the Light Lunches
You Want Good Insurance
Thfat's the kind I write. Prompt adjustments of
all losses.
Fire, Life, Accident and Casualty.
Unto JiiNt nddeil to my Hue ono of the leading llvo-Mock In
Niirauce companies in the Culled Slates.
E. I. Chandler
Coke llulldllig
Marshrield
Teach Your Children to
Save Money--
It's the First Step in the
art of getting ahead. See
that they have a Savings
account IN THIS BANK
First National Bank i;
HOME OF THE SAVER
Marshfleld, . Oregon
BE PHEPAHEI) to flimv PHOSPEIMTV A JOVOUS DECEPTION
ami CONTIXl'Ol'S WELCOME. V011 ran't entertain prosper,
lly, unyboily, or enjoy llfo properly yourself unless you liuvo inuslo
lu the home.
SEE US AT ONCE.
Thomas Music Company
Consolidation of Wiley II. Allen nnd W. II. Haines Music Stocks
Oil (en Ira I Avenue.
PLAN TO TAKE
Swnday Dimer
at the
ChaimdlleiT Hotel
The Huh of
Central Avenue
A (IOOI) menu