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THE COOS BAY TIMES, MABSHFIEEP. OBEGONf. FRIDAY, JANUARY 28, 1 916. EVEWING EDITION.
t MJMWfttlMJWl.;"'
THREE
The Central Avenue Booster
CENTRAL AVENUE, FRIDAY, JANUARY 28, 11)10
No. 7U
,4l i
vol. i.
A Typewriter in the Home
.. Iiriiiiu'tilllin It'll II I'flllhllllM'ml II Unit nf lln liuull
.....iiliii for ho lii tlio office only. All eif Hint has
I 'm! To write a li'ltct- lonir hand now In to wrilo nt a tllsutl
rttV both to tlio writer nmf tho ono who receives the Totter.
I ok 'into 1,l,M 'rl,mk ll ovcl'' T,,cn col" ,n a,,cI ,""k at a
"button .Timloi tlia bnmd noiv up-todnto itiuchliio sold ami
nipcd In tlio Remington Typewriter Company, tlio largest
fwirllcr producer In the Horld. Tho price Ih -..(.
Don't bo trailer. Coiiio In on n convenient Inlior saving dev-
!.i.irli will murk you in being up to rigto. Vonr correspond-
will Ihimk jo" o"'ll li"k yourself after you liavo iimtlo
lP11. Terms? Anything that you vwint.
We'll make It so
easy '
will never think of tho cost.
Till? CENTRAL AVENUE BOOSTER
1
Published Every Friday In tho Inter
ests of Coos Hay In General And
Central Avcnuo In particular.
Entered nt the PoBtofflco ns strictly
HrBt-Class matter j there Ib nothing
Bocond-CInBs about Contral Avonuo.
Subscription Price. Your good will,
nuu membership In tho Booster Club
AGAIN .Till. GIHL
Remingtor Typewriter Company
L. W. Jacobs, District Saios Agont
Phono 1WD.J. No. TA, Central Avenue, .Mut'suricm
No.
'Saturday's Market Basket
Cabbage Squash Beets Lettuce
Carrots Turnips Rutabagas Sweet
Cranberries - Apples Potatoes
Oranges Pineapple's Cocoanuts ' Banana's
Fancy Bulk Olives Ripe and Green
Don't forget that we carry '
practically full line of Heiitf
products including bulk pickles.
Fancy California strained honey in pint jars only 25c.
All kinds of the best breakfast foods for these cold
mornings '
Sanitary Food Store
SERVICE FIRST
piioxi? 21:1
(Formerly Nusbiirg'H Grocery,.)
KKCONI) AND CENTRAL
Bring Us Your Repair Work
If your watch Isn't keeping goo'dtlmo, bring It In and wo will
clean It, regulate it, or ninka whntovor ropnlrn nro necessary. Our
charges aro most reasonable and wo guarantee- our work.
If you liavo a proclous Btono that you want mounted or tlio
mounting changed, wo can do It. And If you noort now Jowolory
for any purpose wo nro pro-pared to aorvo you.
Wilson's Jewelry Store
Wo fitiarantco our repair work.
Central Avonuo.
OTIS II. WILSON, Prop.
Don't euro to hear of Wilson,
Nor of Europo's war
Don't caro about tho tnxes,
Nor antics of Jack Tar.
Sneor at tho coming railway
For prosperity, don't give a rip
World has lost attraction
When n fellow's got tho grip,
Don't caro about tho council
(Exciibo mo; must sneczo and
bark),
Don't caro what tho loggers do
In daylight or after dark
Don't caro for tho now clock
chimes
For Joe Dennett, not a pip;
Don't caro a darn for nothing.
When a follow's got tho grip.
Don't rnro It wait In Torroll'a
Shop,
Though fifteen aro ahead;
Don't caro if rent is duo
Or if your eyes nro red
Don't caro whethor Tho Times
comes
Or If our coffco sip
Nor nbout Tho Booster
When a fellow's got tho grip.
Don't caro If collector calls
Forty times a day;
Don't caro It tho pavements broko
And streets aro mado of clay
Don't caro If tho rent is duo,
Do not glvo a flip;
Don't care If tho world should and,
When a fellow's got tho grip.
Don't caro of tlmos aro good '
Or whether they aro dull;
Don't caro It birds sing
Or If thoy'ro liko tho gull.
Don't caro It tho sun shines,
Or If wcoplng cloudlets drip
Don't caro If wo should die
When a follow's got tho grip.
ANON
, SM I LE-A-WI 1 1 LI?
AN APPRECIATION, WITH FUR
THER CONTRIIIUTION TO
Till? SUBJECT
Table and Kitchen Ware
Just glauro nt our window and notlro tlio fino attractive China
at U10 low prices, either by sots or separate pieces.
We have homo fine aluminum cooking utensils that suvo
voik and money for tlio housewife.
Conio In and lot us show you the merits of our Kitchen ranges
Marshtield Hardware Co.
Tho host in tlio Hardware lino.
Uroadwny and Central Avenue. I'hono 31
Advertise in
The Booster
Havo you got anything to soil
or swap? Do you want to buy
anything?
THEN TRY A AD WITH US
D'egest and only Nowspapor on
Coutral Avonuo.
Advertising rates furnished
JfHh great cheer. Simulation
books open to nobody.
You'll Have to Take Our
Word for It.
DON'T BE A
TITEWAD
Pay up yoUP Dack subscription
t0 the Boo!ter and thus fill" a'
lns felt want on our part.
NEWSPAPER ON HOT AIR
AND COLD POTATOES
v' S. if Wo are not In, leavo
money wUh our wlfe next
door,
!;.
. A. TUYE,
DENTIST
"ou" 9 to l2; 1 to 5.
A Good Place
If you ask anyono on Coos Bay
who knows tlio places for a good
placo to drop In to while away a
few hours In the evening, tlio nns.
wer wlil ho:
"THE SMOKEHOUSE"
Good billiard tables, good pool
tables, comfortnblo soats; tho best
cigars, 'tobaccos and tho lato magazines.
Join the Good Fellows at
1 The Smokehouse
Central Avenue's popular meeting
placo, ' "
When Jn
Want
of Fire, Life and Ma
rine insurance which
insures, see
SENSTACKEN
the
Insurance Man
Mr. noostor Editor:
YOUIt editorial on tho "Grlppo"
which apponrcd last weok do-
serves a poramanont placo in
literature, along with Do Qulncy's
"Confessions of an Opium Eator."
Your correspondent wna delirious
hlmsolt onco, Tind although ho was
not ablo aftorwards to sot down his
reflections, your thesis recalled viv
idly many of his Impressions at tho
tlmo.
Whllo you covered tho subject
thoroughly, leaving llttlo to tho Ima
gination, thoro aro a fow reflections
loft regarding cortaln aspects of tho
dlscaso which may almost bo said to
glvo It n "brlghtor sldo."
In (ho first placo, It Is a mark of
civilization. As small pox and yel
low fever bolong to a past ago, no
grippo and appondlcltls boiong to
tho present. Evon bo lato a work
as Woodrow Wilson's History of
tho United States makes no men
tion of it. It is not ovon now
found among inferior racos. Tho
benighted Esquimaux nover heard
of it.
Then, liko tho rain, it falls nllko
upon tho Just and tho unjust. It Is
a lovelor. Tho dlfforenco Is that
the unjust are usually so "heeled"
that they can manago to stay In
out of tho rain; but they cannot
escapo tho grippe. Doctors, law
yers, railroad officials and land
lords havo it. Evon tho County
Assessor had it.
It Is an educator, above all mal
adies. Tako tho old fashionod
man who "was never sick In his
life." Ho declares that a llttlo
common senso, and a few simple,
old fashioned remedies, beat all tho
fool doctors' theories and pink med
icines that woro over sprung on a
gulllblo public. A llttlo sulphur
ovory spring for tho children, a
bottlo of gooso grease for tho
croup, and a korosonod rag for
colds, Bufflco for the medical nec
essities of( his family. He'll havo
no foolishness.
Sooner or later this worthy man
"don't feel right somohow." "Must
have got hold of some cannod food
that was no good." Ho won't ;-.lvo
up, but finally feels that It wouldn't
hurt him to rest a bit. Ho doesn't
feel like smoking. When his eyes
begin to look liko a opuplo of au
tomobile lamps, and ho complains
that his feet aro frosted, and has
threatened to eat ono of tho child
ren, his wife Bocrotly sends out for
the' doctor. Sho Is mortally afraid
Father will throw him out of thn
house, but ho doesn't. Ho lets
him stick a thermometer In his
mouth, poke him all ovor, aud ram
n big powter Bpoon down hla
throat.
Tho doctor Bays its a touch of
grippe, and he can tako his choice
between the quack medicine, aud
staying In bed a week, or working
a hardship on tho Ufa insuranco
company.
After a few days of treatment,
ho gets up, feels like an anaemic
rubblt, and realizes that medical
skill had saved iilm from tho maus
oleum. After that, ho respects
modern sclonco, and calls a doctor
Iho minute his plpo begins to tasto
wrong.
It Is also a groat boon to tho
doctors. No matter what form an
ailment takes, a physician Is always
safo In diagnosing It as grlppo.
Ho tells you It Is taking that form
this winter, Just as tho salesman
assures you "this Is what every
body's wearing now"."
If rccovory follows rapidly, you
aro nono tho wlsor. If, howover,
symptoms cnBtto which unquestion
ably label tho troublo "mumps",
or "paresis," then tho physlclnn'has
only to say that it followed tho
grlppo ns a "complication." Per
fectly easy.
It is a matter of prldo to noto
that Marshfiold has Just as many
cases of grlppo por capita as any
of tho ontcrilrlslng cities of tho
coast. Wo nover lag bohlnd, In
anything.
Formerly, when n man claimed
to bo "grlppy", ho was always un
der the suspicion, nt homo, of hunt
ing up an oxcuso to get soaked.
But Blnco Oregon wont dry, and tho
emergency supply of liquors has
rapidly disappeared, ono may com
plain of grlppo, ,nnd oven bo real
sick -with it, and still como off
with n character.
Thus wo sco that, It wo look for
tho brlghtor sldo, thero Is nothing
that might not bo worso than It
Is, and wo can bo thankful ovon
undor affliction. Things might bo
lots worso; wo might bo engaged
In n campaign' of ndvortUIng our
cllmato to Induc'o pooplo to como
to a roso carnival.
A VICTIM
SMILE-A-WHILE
CENTRAL AVENUE SAYINGS
HOES VS. HOSI?
Al Noff stopped 'across tho Utroot
Into tho Hub Dry Goods storo tho
othor day without his hat on. Just
then a lady camo in and seeing Al
with his hat off, thought ho was
ono of tho clorka, and, stepped up
to him saying:
"I would liko to look at somo
hoso, plonso."
Al thinking ho was in his own
storo, nnswored promptly "Yes, Ma'
am. With or without handlos?"
SMILE-A-WHILE
THE AV1SK IlKMAKK
"Thoro nro no Buch things a3
ghosts," remarked Frank Cohan In
n discussion at Tho Owl.
"Maybe not," replied Will Chand
ler, "but tho avorago wlfo con io
through her husband."
8MILK-A-WHILE
PESTS
Thoro Is a man on our street, tho
Ivory headed pup,
At 5 a. ni. ho hauls tho logs and
wnkes tho neighbor's up.
C. S. HOFFMAN
Thoro Is a man on our otroot, and
his brain muBt bo straight
grlstlo;
Ills ono delight sooms Just to boo
how darned loud ho can
whistle.
ANON
Thero Is a pest on our Btroot, I
8omehow can't got ustor
At early mom from Cathcart's
barn, I hear tho noisy roost
er. J. T. HAItRIGAN
NOT SO GREEN
XcvtH Scarce. News Is very
scarco In our midst this week.
Perhaps there will bo nloro of
them next week. Let us hope so.
A Tlinbcrinaii. W J. Conrnd Is
well known as a timber man but
that's no sign that ho chops tho
kindling at home.
Snow on Central. Thoro was a
heavy fall of tho beautiful bhow
on Central Avenuo ono day this
week but wo can't recall which
day.
Shops Early. Frank Cohan did
his Christmas shopping early. Next
Christmas he is going o giro
away tho prcsonts Ho received last
Christmas.
Extral Extra! Wo uro unable
to confirm a report circulated lato to
day that Tom Donnctt wob nbout to
institute suit ngalnst tho City because
tho snow on tho streets lntorfcrod
with tho logging operations.
High Finance on Ccntrid. Yo
Editor has been trying to ralso
monoy to pay Interest on his mort
gage It ain't tho mortgago that
bothers yo Ed. but it is tho In
terest. Slippery Steps. If you nover
saw nnybody wallt a tight ropo
you can 'got tho exact offoct by
watching any Contrnl Avenuo res
ident walk down his front stops
theso cold mornings, whon tho
porch Is good and slippery.
Tlio Weather. Wo hear lots ot
kicking nbout tho weather lately,
but whon wo run It down wo nenr-
py nlwayn find Its tho man who Is
usually saying "goo, but I got
tired of theso winter rains; I wish
I could seo a good old Eastern
snow storm onco."
What's tho Usc Thoro can't bo an
awful lot of unemployed In Marsh
field, or somebody would ho nftor a
Job cleaning snow off tho sldowalks.
Art Itohfold Bays It would bo ot no uso
do clean tho walks, though, ns It
would snow again right awny, and it
would all havo to bo done ovor again.
Tako Kew O'Yoursclf Wb aro sor
ry to loso Chas. Van Duyn from Con
'trnl Avonuo. Chas. thinks ho needs
a rest just bocnuso ho lias workod
steadily for six or seven years. Truly
tho mon of this generation nro a soft
and pampered lot. The next thing we
know Judgo Uutlor will wnnt a vnca
Hon.
Epidemic Among Docs, Thoro
scorns to bo a opldomlc among tho
Docs of Central Avenuo. Doc
Housoworth hns tho grip and Doc
JohtiBon Is Biitforlng from an In
fection on tho hand. Somo of
Doc's friends havo becomo ularmod
about hi in, (""I kaVQ Urgod hint to
consult somo good physician.
Physician Ileal Tliysolf. Doo
Housoworth ain't boon very well
lately but Doe don't complain any.
On tho contrary ho suffers in sl-
lonco bocauso ho knows It ho ad
mitted, ho was sick folks would
naturally point tho flngor of scorn
nt him for not bolng ablo to euro
hlssolt with his own modlclno. It
ain't a very good recommendation
for tho pills and powders Doc gives
otjiors whon ho can't relievo hisselt
With B0I110.
, SMILE-A-WHILE
"You nro tho first girl I over
kissed,"
Ho swore and bowed his head.
Tho girl looked up and moved
away,
"I am no prep school, sir," she
said.
CLAUDE THOMPSON
SMILE-A-WHILE
TEHSONAL MENTION.
.
DIl HOUSBWORTH SAYS: "Tho
worst dlscaso tho docs havo to
deal with Is tho Imagination.
"DAD" WELSH SAYS. "It tho
suffragettes keep on protty soon
they'll bo saying "Awoman" at
tho ond of each prayer.
I. S. KAUFMAN SAYS: "It is
pleasing to hoar a man say that
tho country Is on a wave ot
prosperity, ovon It ho doosn't
' . ..
pay tuo rent,
A. T. HAINES has boon complain
Ing of tho grlppo. Thats a vory
good thing to call It, but wo
aro afraid Art has beon attend'
UOOSTEH WANT ADS 1
4 -
WANTED For summer, a Coos
River cottage for a small fam
ily with good drainage. Ad
dress "Summer" Care Booster.
FOR SALE Bull dog, will oat
anything, very fond of children.
Frank Cohan.
WANTED A boy to bo partly out
sldo and partly behind tho coun
ter. "Storo" Booster.
FOR. SALFv Several blocks of per
forated" paving. Apply City
Hall.
Phone 74 Por
Drug Store
Needs
WE DELIVER IMIE
DIATELY You huvo tho same sat
isfaction as though shop
ping In person.
"The Owl"
Wo Dolher Immediately
Tho Central Avenuo Drug
Storo
Phono 74
ing too closely to business, and
has contracted hay fovor,
AL MYERS Is the only man In town
who wns, long headed enough to
keep his lawn insldo, and npw Hint
everybody elso's Is covered with
snow. Al's shows up grcon and
flourishing, and is n pleasant sight,
LIONEL GORDON scared away a
lot of trado from his store this
weok. Ho had an ulcerated
tooth, and his faco was so en
larged that his customers didn't
rccogntzo him, and couldn't bo
porsuaded that tho placo hadn't
changed hands.
J. T. HARRIOAN Is out for Coun
ty Commissioner. Wo aro glad
to seo Central Avenuo going af
ter moro offlcos, but wo havo
had n number ot pooplo toll us
thoy would liko to know how
Jack stands on supporting- tho
noutrallty ot tho United States
beforo they can dccldo to support
him.
SMILE-A-WHILE
H&MUdMlMAiil
iMMMtMlMiGbSM
-
HEALTH HINT
CENTRAL AVENUE OMAU
And when Frank Saccht you shall
pass
Among the cows thoro scattered
in tho grass
Aud in your errand reach tho
ono Oiat gives milk punch
Draw mo a foaming glass.
DORSEY KRBITZER
SM I LE-A-WH 1 LI?
Last night friend wife, In fresh' air
frenzy,
Throw ope tho window, an ln-flu-
enzy.
A. L. H. SB TH
. Just Received, Fine
Line of Office
Stationery
and Supplies
Our prices are right,
.' see us before you
Order Again
MARSHFIELD
T, NEWS CO. ,
(Formerly Frizcon's)
Gabrlelson & Jarvls
Contral Ave. Marshfiold
"Everybody Is Doing It Now"
80 ARE WE
Tho greatest, most stupendous, marvelous, overpowering, Clos
ing Out, Soiling Out, Going Out of business, Removal, l'ro-lnvontory
After-Inventory, Remodeling, Reduction, Smoko Damage, Water
Damage, 1'lro Damage, Red-Tag, Marked Up, Marked Down, Over
stocked Sale. AU combined In ono grand offering of
Fire, Accident and Life Insurance
nt prices so low 'you cannot afford to go without fall protection on
everything you own. Our of Geo lias hcen closed nights for .10 days
preparing for this sale. ,
Tho Sale starts TOMORROW MORNING and will continue until
further notice. '
Phono and mall orders will rcrelvo prompt attention. Wo fur
nish Revenue Stamps with '.every Policy and make deliveries any
wlirro.
Coko, Building
E. I. Chandler
Marshflcld
We Specialize In
PICTURE FRAMING
iVnda
KODAK FINISHING.
Rehfelds
Special Order Work a Specialty
220 Central Avenue Marshfiold
me You a Savings Accout?
IP YOXi HAVEN'T, YOUR ROAD TO COMPETENCE AND 8U0
CEBS WILL RE HARD
START ONE WITH US TODAY x ' -l
Avoid posslhlo loss of monoy, nilvups over receipts and other troiw
bleu in mooting your monthly accounts by paying your bills by
check. Como In and open u savings account and do business In
u buslncss'llko way.
The First National
Bairak?F0co0os.BAy
BE PREPARED to show PROSPERITY A JOYOUS RECEPTION
and CONTINUOUS WELCOME. You can't entertain prosper
ity, anybody, or enjoy Ufo properly yourself unless you havo inuslo
in tho homo.
SEE US AT ONCE. f
Thomas Music Company
Consolidation of Wiley R. Alien and W. R. Haines Music Stocks
0:1 Central Avenuo.
PLAN TO TAKE
Suimday Dinner
AT THE
Chandler Hotel
jy The Huh of
AGpowMENv " yJ wri$mmGmkri-AmUx
-- ' "
;
.. -. rt, euue. Marshf leld