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nflLI ouuSTJH'MlWEbTTWKKSHnHL-DrORGON, WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 23, 1908.
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COOS BAY TIMES
An Independent Republican news
faper published every evening except
fiuaday, and Weekly by
do Coos Bay Tiiiieft Publishing Co.
Entered at the postoDl:e tit Marsh
field, Oregon, for tr nsmission
S&rougk the malls as second class
eeall matter.
M. C. MALO.VEY. . .Kditor Md Pub.
PAV K. MALOVKY, .New Kditor
UBSpiUPTION RATES.
In Advance.
DAILY.
One year 6,00
gtx Months .'.'.'..$2.50
Less than 6 mnn'hs per month. .50
weekly.
as Year $1.50
Adaress All Communications to
COOS BAY DAILY TIMES
Marr-3rlU - Oregon
s
The Dollcy of tue Coos Bay T jus
will b iiepubllcan tn politics, wph
the independence of -"hich Presl lent
Ecosevelt is the leadlnz exponent
PRODUCTION'.
When extreme protectionists tread
the ghastly lanes of a nightmare and
extreme free traders shake the finger
of warning, it is a relief' to turn to
-the solace of the contemplation of
the resources of this land of ours.
Here are figures that run to ex
tremes, but anyone is a wonder who
can read nightmares in them or the
awful warnings of Fate:
The United States annually prod
uces more corn than all other coun
tries ot the world combined 2,927,
000,000 out of 3,888,000,000 bush
els. The United States annually prod
wees more wheat than any other
country in the world 034,000,000
out of 3,10S,000,000 bushels.
The United States annually ex
ports more wheat flour than all the
other countries of the world com
bined, 15,000,000 out of 2C.000.000
oushels.
The United States annually exports
more wheat, Including wheat flour,
than anv other country in the world
146,000,000 out of 040,000,000
toushels.
The Unitpd States annually prod--uces
more oats than any other coun
try in the world 754,00,000 out of
3,582,000,000 bushels.
The United States is the third
largest annual producer of barley In
the world, 153,000,000 bushels
only 7,000,000 bushels less than
Germany, with Russia leading.
The United States annually prod--oces
more cotton than all the other
countries of the world 13,000,000
nt of 20,000,000 balss, and a'.so ex
Tiorts" more cotton than dors al' the
rest of the world 9,000,000 out of
13,000,000 bales.
The United States annually exports
more cottonseed oil than all the
other countries of the world com
bined 42,000,000 out of 52,000,000
gallons.
The United States annually prod
uces more tobacco than any other
country in the world 690,000,000
out of 2,201,000,000 pounds.
The United States annually prod
uces more flaxseed than any other
country in the world 25,000,000
-out of 87,000,000 bushels.
The United States annually prod
uces more hops than any other coun
try In the world 57,000,000 out of
211,000,000 pounds.
The United States annually exports
more oilcake and oilcake meal than
any other country in the world
2,063,000,000 out of 4,913,000,000
jpounds.
The United States annually exports
xnoro rosin than all the other coun
tries of tho world 717,000,000 out
of 840,000,000 pounds.
Tho United States annually export
more spirits of turpentine than all
the other countries of tho world
1C.000.000 out of 24,000,000 gal
lons. Tho United States has more (22,
244,446) dairy cows than any other
country In tho world; more horses,
23,000,532; more mules, 4,056,399;
inoro swine, 57,97C,361; and (except
British India) more cattle, 73,246,
573. Among our other great crops may
T)o mentioned:
Potatoes, bushels 308,038,000
"Hay, value J743.000.000
lllce, pounds 529.400.000
Jleets. tons 3,767,871
Beet sugar manufactur
ed, lbs 927.256,430
Cane sugar, long tons . . . 1,532,954
QUARTERS HOODOOED?
According to an observing coin
collector, superstitious persons who
believe in the "13" hoodoo should
liavo nothing to do with a quarter
dollar, for-tho unlucky 13 Is much In
tevidenco on tho coins of that deno--mlnntlon.
He has noted that on tho
faco of tho coin there are 13 starts,
and if It happens to bear the date
1903 those figures total 13. On the
roverso side there aro 13 stars above
liho eagle, 13 letters la the words,
Heart to Heart
Talks.
By EDWIN A. NYE.
Copjrricht, 1308. br Edwin A. Njr.
O
AITU TUP
OAST AND TEA J
--4
GOOD EVENING.
0
HOW THEY GET THE BUNS.
Morris Drown, crippled urchin of.
N'ew York city, smashed the window
of a baker's shop and was arrested.
Morris, who is fourteen years old.
was sent by his mother to buy buns.
At' the shop be met another boy who
was on a like errand. Morris saw
that the other boy got one more bun
for his money, whereupon he protest
ed. There was a debate with the
baker, and Morris was thrown out.
pursued by the baker's dog.
The smashed window was the se
quel.
"De udder kid. he got more buns 'n
tne and got more sugar on his buns."'
was the plea .Morris made to the judge.
Which was a good plea.
The newspaper account does not gi-
the outcome of the matter, but the In
cident and the boy's plea are sug
gestlve.
The boy voiced the American flea of
a "square deal." It Is not fair that
one loy or one citlren should ppt more
buns and more sugar on hl buns than
another.
One of the pressing problems Is the
equitable distribution of wealth.
We say the American Idpa It thit of
"equal rights for all. special privileges
to none." and yet we know that cer
tain special Interests have been given
undue advantages. These Interests
have had more bun's and more sugar
on their buns than they are entitled to.
Therefore the righteous protests of
the Morris Browns.
When the little cripple's case was
called In the police court the baker
was rei resented byapaidattorney.bat
Morris had to depend on the mercy of
the court.
And here also the analogy holds.
The special Interests that secure spe
cial privileges extra buns are repre
sented in the courts by high priced
I-iwyers. The people elect young at
torneys who are Just beginning to prac
tice and pay them a small salary to
pnwute the rich criminals.
That Is why If a man steals a loaf of
bread to keep the womnn he loves
from Rtarvlng he goes to the penlten
liary. while the banker who steals a
million and robs widows and orphans.
gets off s"ot free. Eminent attorneys
find technicalities, and the rich man
get away with the sugar buns.
The case of the baker ngainst Mor
rW 1-rnwn Is a typical one. If you
will think o,ver the incidents and the
plea of the young citizen you will dis
cover one cause of tho "social un
rest." It Is t-ecnuse of the buns.
SHORT CUTS.
Though today may not fulfill i
i All thy hopes, have patience X
still,
t For perchance tomorrow's sun S
Sees thy happier days begun. H
H Selected
0$3$
i
If You Take the Long Way Round
You Never Arrive.
Let women who lime swallowed
wholesale the proverb that short cuts
are bometluies longest forget It. This
Is u day of short cuts. If you take
the long way tound you never at rive.
Cuts to be bhort need not be poorly
done with n liluut kulfe. The clever
'st surgeon is he who can perform thu
biggest operation with the shortest
gash
I.e.ira to do things quickly, but well.
Potti'iiug Is ii uiiiil tabooed In the up
to date lexicon.
In this hustling world the woman
who does not "get theie" on an air
Hue never lias a name to re.-t.
Take to rouvursutlonnl short cuts.
She who rambled beats about the
bush, proses, bores her hearers nud
uses up her own nervoui energy. If
terseness were a habit doitors would
never have to ordT for their women
patients periods of Trapplst silence.
Be a housekeeping shwt cutter.
Avoid nonesscntlils Spend on labor
savers rather than on frills. Get down
to a system and hold every one else
In your household to It. This way lies
the solution to the eternal strvant
problems.
Ilunt short cuts with the needle
Many women wear their lives out with
constant stitching. Flue hand work Is
a luxury. Take to a machine for
steady wear.
Digging Is for the specialist, the
scholar. Tho average busy mau or
woman to rend at all must seek short
cuts. Itevlews und abstracts are not
admirable, but they nre better than
total Ignorance. Literary culling Is not
the old wny. It seems to be the only
way In these days of varied Interests.
Be a short cutter In business. Learn
dotatls. then study to eliminate them
tf yon would have time and strength
for bigger things. The swiftest rond
to success has tho fewest curves.
"B Plurlbus Unun," whren appears
on tho scroll held in the eagle's beak;
13 horizontal bars on the shield; 13
arrowheads held in one claw, while
tho branch hold In tha other claw
has Just 13 leaves, and the letters of
tho name "quarter-dollar," at the
bottom count up 13.
HAVE YOU seen tho Stein way
Piano now scale at Sherman, Clay &
Co., Coos Building, Marshfleld, Ore.
SHERMAN & CLAY have COME TO
STAY.
Warranted silverware and Jowelrj
at tho RED CROSS.
About Due.
The good old gift cigars
That father flags
Are older than the stars
As Christmas gags.
Yet they must duty do once more
The Jester needs them as of yore.
The cotton-batting beard,
Another pest,
Is what I call a weird
And jaundiced jest.
But it must duty do once more
And all us weary mortals bore.
The good old Christmas jokes
Are all in line.
We can't escape them, folks,
So why repine?
They all must duty do once more,
As they have often done before.
A Pessimist.
When They Are Engaged.
Say his friends: "What can he see
In that awkward maiden, slim?"
Her friends say: "What a silly
To throw hersolf away on htm!"
Exchange
Never do any worrying today that
can be put off till tomorrow.
"I never dreamed I would, either,"
replied the dazed youth, who had
just been accepted.
Many a man who. loves his neigh
bor as himself would be In serious
trouble If his wife knew it.
Tho trlrl who eets married during
leap year must be very beautiful In
order to escape suspicion.
We have watched it a good wny
years and there Is always something
wrong with' the man whowaniu to
carry the girl's parasol:
A New York court has decided
that a young man can't compel his
fiancee to return his gifts. Neither
can it compel the fiancee to return
the kisses.
The average man's ideal way to
live would be in a cozy little cot-,
tage away off In the country with a
cigar store, drug store, theatre and
club within four minutes' walk.
"Chess, checkers and whist are
marvelous inventions," says the phil
osopher of folly. "They enable a
man to waste his time and still have
the feeling that he Is accomplishing
something intellectual."
"That house that you finished a
few weeks ago is the biggest of the
lot," said the real estate agent,
"Perhaps that's why It's so hard to
find a tenant."
"Yes," answered the builder, "It's
last but not leased."
Photographer (to young man)
It will make a much better picture
If you put your hand on your father's
shoulder.
The Father Huh! It would be
much more natural If he had his
hand In my pocket!
Miss Inland You certainly have a
charming country place here, and
of course you have given It some
pretty name?
Mr. Bondholder Oh, yes! Mrs.
Bondholder calls It 'Udlemoment-by-the-Sea,"
but I call at by Its right
name, "Moneysunk."
: v - t
I am making out my list,"
For of cash, I've not a fist,
And nobody must be missed,
Oh, dear me.
For the list It stretches so,
I agree with those who show
More elastic now should grow
Currency.
Up Against It.
A little girl had been told by
her teacher to stand with her face
north, and her right hand would bo
at tho east, her left hand would be
at the west, and her back would be
at the south. Starting to go over
It, the teacher asked, "Now tell me
what Is in front of you?"
After some thought, the little one
replied, "My stomach." .
a-K-a-a-a-a-a--a-a-u-a-::-a-aH-ra-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-H-H-
ioys
Ioys
Toys
On tomorrow, Thursday, we are going to sell the
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remainder of our large stock of toysTr
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at a discount of
9 S
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75 cents will buy $1.00 worth of toys at our store, Everything is marked in plain
figures and from these prices we will deduct 25 per cent: -
Express Wagons, reg. $2.25 - :;l- .:. $1.70
Express Wagons, reg. $2.50 r :. $1.90
Velocipedes, rubber tires, reg. 5.00 lai $3.75
Velocipedes, rubber tires, reg. $5.501 l'i $4.10
Velocipec'es, rubber tires, reg. $6.25 " "$4.70
Velocipedes, steel tires, reg. $3.50 Ll $2.70
Velocipedes, steel tires, reg. $3.75 1 !" -. y $2.60
Dolls all prices from 1 1 20c to $8.50
REMEMBER THE PLACE AMD SAVE MONEY.
V
HARVEY GO,
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COMPLETE HOUSE FURNISHERS
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a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-aa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a
NORTH FRONT STREET.
a
MARSHFIELD, ORE.
the family plot or cremated. In the
course of the discussion the mother
said weepingly to her son:
"John, what do you think?"
"I leave it to you, mother."
"I make It sp-pades," was her reply.
"It Is astonishing what faith the
old school farmer used to put in his
almanac," said a farmer of the new
school, a graduate of an agricultural
college.
"My father was an old s,Aool
farmer, and In June he would con
sult his almanac to see If we were
going to have a clear Christmas.
What though the almanac usually,
went back on him? Sometimes its
predictions were true, and one ac
curate prophecy counterbalanced In
my father's mind 50 mlscues.
"Once I crossed the ocean with the
old man. We sat at the captain's
table, and the first night out my
father, laying down his spoon, said
anxiously:
" 'Captain, hev ye got an almanac
on board?'
" 'No,' the captain answered.
"The old man frowned and shook
his head.
" 'Then, by gosh,' he said, 'we'll
hev to take the weather as she
comes.' "
Cramer
tock
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Gornp
ny
POOR MAN TO GET
FORTUNE OF $700,000
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Can
at Masonic Opera House
stmas Night, Dec, 25th
n "A Southern Jack Rose" I
Saturday and
Dec 26t
Sunday Night
h & 27th
For Bargains In Candles, see COR
TIIELL'S AD. ,(
The father of a family, all of
whom were devotees of bridge and
much given to talking the game and
holding post-mortems over badly
played hands, died rather suddenly.
There was a difference of opinion as
to whether he should be burled In
NEW BRITAIN, Conn., Dec. 18.
From a comparatively poor man to
be one of the richest in the city is
the sudden change that John Worth
ner, engineer at the Traut & Hlne
Manufacturing Company, has under
gone. Mr. Worthner has just fallen
heir to $700,000, his portion of an
estate of over $3,000,000 left by his
brother. . George Worthner, a manu
facturer, who died at Schandau,
Saxony, July 28, of the present year.
George Worthner was the sole own
er of a large establishment which
manufactured surgical and optical
Instruments.
George left two brothers, John of
this city and Jacob of Wurtemburg,
Germany, and an adopted daughter,
who will receive one-third of the
estate. John Worthner will con
tinue In the employ of the factory
here, where he is held In high esteem.
In VAUDEVILLE
EVERY MEMBER OF TIIE COMPANY APPEARING IN NEW,
HIGH CLASS STUNTS.
Sweats Now on Sale at Butler's
i-a-a-a-a-a-r-a-a-a--8- -a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-;
Christmas Kodaks at the RED
CROSS.
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:-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a--a-a-a-a-a--a-a-tt--a-a-a-a-a
Diamond Rings
AND ' ' '.:
Jewelery
AT
TOWER
The Jeweler
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