i IF YOU DOH'T READ IF YOU SEE IT IM 1 J I 1 The Plaindealer i Tke Plaindealer r IT IS SO. You Don't Get the News j ROSEBURG, OREGON, THURSDAY, FEBRUARY 28, 1895. No. 43. Vol. XXV. V 1 GENERAL DIRECTORY &T1TE OP t.KEGOK, c 0 . I J. It. Mltchctl J. S-boanlors j J, K. Dolph I lUngcr Hermann ) JW.lUEUls jongrcssncn .Vttorncy-Gcnyra G. B. Chamberlain ..-Sylvester I'ennoycr Ueorco V. McUrido Secretary of State State Treasurer- SupU rub. Instruction- -.rnii Mciscnan K.B.McElroy Frank a Baker Male A-nnicr Member Board ot Kg.uauia:IonA. C. Woodcock SV. A. Jloorc O. K. Wolvcrton K.S. Bean A. B. Corapsen Railroad Commissioners. J. B. Eddy i (I. A. Jiacnira Clerk: ot Kallrc-J Commission Lydcll Baker SKCOND JUDICIAL DISTRICT. Judge- J- C. Fullcrton Prusecuuns Attorney Geo. M. Brown tu s. uiso orncr, toxntcto. Receiver .P8 Scjisicr 15- M- Veatch C. S. WKATHSR Ct'ECiU. Olscrrcr. Thos. Gioson DOeS LAS COCSTY. .iMSSiF KcrreuuUv fefee Ucrk , F. W Benson iherUT. C F. Cathcart treasurer - -v. nam School Superludcnt J. A. Underwood J.A. Sterling assessor-. County Judge Commissioner. A. r. Mcarns tW. iL. Wilson JC. II. Maupln Will T. HeyJon surveyor,. Coroner- Dr. K. L. Sillier sheep Inspector, Thos. smua rrrnscr ornccts. JUillcos .John Hamlin Jons.tWcs 1LC. Slocum CtTV Or taSEKOUG f W.T. Wright J. U.Shupe M.K. Kapp I U.O. Strong 1 1. F. Rice rrosice ... Recorder- , F. JtZlgler W. F. Carroll J. A. Cox Marshal- Treasurer- couk; Etsaioss. The Circuit Court for Douelas County meets founds: The Sd Hon day ia Jlarch, the 4th Monday In June, and the 1st Monday m December. J. C Fullerton ot Eoseburz ju.lc. Geo. M. Brown, of Koscburg, prosecuiiKsauoiucy. ... , , Countv Coin meets the 1st Wednesday after tacistilonaayot January, jiarca, juij. September aid XovcmcVr. A. 1". Stearns, ot Oakland, iudre: C. H. Maupln of Elkton and W. L. Wilson, of Riddle, commissioners. i'roMte Courtis in session continuously, A.F. Stearns, ind-e. Society Jlccliuj TAOUEIi LODGE. A. Y. Jfc A. M- KEGOLAR Av mceUags the 2d and 4th Wednesdays " each month. TTSll'QWA CHAITEE, SO. 11. H. A. M., HOLD U UicirrerslAT convocations at Masonic hall on the first and third Tuesday ol each month. Visitin; companions arc cordiaUy invited. iLF.KArr, II. P. ISASosx Caeo, Secretary. riHILETARLVX LODGE. SO. S. L O. O. F.. AT T--rt -?tt-i' .t- .rnir.r nf r&rii reet at 7 o'clock in their tali at Eceebarr. Members of the order In good standing are invited to attend. . T. JawciT, Scc'y. TTSIOX ESGAMPMEST, SO. 9, MEETS AT vi odd Fellows' hall 'a second and fourth Thursdays of each month. Visiting brethren ar-; invitca ioaucsu. Feass G. Mien; i, Scribe. llAUT PAEtT, C. P. nnsrnnr.r. 1)IWP. SO. IS. A. O. U. W. K- mccu the second od foorth Mondays of schr3oain atTO p. m. at tld Fellows haU. Members of the order in gooJ Undlag arc in- vued to auenu. TESOrOST, SO. 19. U. A. C, MEETS THE -V jjjst cad thinl Thczsdayi of each mecth. WOMES'S RELIEF CORPS SO. 19, MEETS V second fourth Thuudays in each month. T?AEAl? ALLXAXCE Regular Quarterir l will be held at tirane Hall. J- Mcetiue-a BwAc-r. Uie first Fridav in Decemoer. March iH June, ana mctniru rnaay ia sepiciiiuci. D OSEBOEG CHAPTER. SO. S.O. E.S MEETS Xv n- uxund and foerth Thursdays of each a"u MADELISE B. COXKLINU, W. M. ROSEBURG DI-1SI0S SO O.5.0FL.E., meets every second and fourth Sunday. OSEBUBG R. D. LODGE, SO. 41, 1. O. O. f. meets on Tuesday evening of each week it the Odd Fellows hall. Visiting sitters and Mcthres are invited to attend. Mrss Sasaii Wixbexlt, S. G. Fxaxs G. Mictxu. K. See. A 1PHA LODGE. SO. -TT. K. OF I".. MEETS A. WrisHhr malas at Odd Fellows sr.n visiUng bremrcn m gooa saaamg cur dlaUy Invited attend. GZdSCE X. ZEOWX. rtro. rASE-Tcsns. jgBOWH & TUSTCv', Attornej-s-at-Law, Coaas7andS Taylor i Wilson Block. ROSEBURG, OR. R. -WILLIS, Attorney and Counselor at Law, "Wai rraetice in all th conrU of the EUte. Of la U Uc Covsx Uaate. DooUs eoucty. Or. Q A. SEHLBREDE, Attorney at Law, Jiotttiurg, Ortgvn. OCk over the FostoSu on Jackson street. TV. CA2DWELL, Attorney at Law, E0EBUEG, OREGOS. P E. C0FFMA1?, 'Physician and Surgeon 02ee:At Dr. Hoover' old stand on Oak Street Residence Cor. Lane & Jackson Streets. J 7AXS' n' D'' Physician and Surgeon, EOSEBUEG, OK. OSce In S. Marks i Co.'i Block, upstairs. Calls promptly ensxered day or night. JAMES BASH, Physician and Surgeon. Graduate Rush Medical College. Diseases of Women and Children a Specialty OFFICE, Rooms 9 Marsters' Bulldlnc Residence, Donrlis Street, second place cast Dr. Bunnell's. ' ROSEBURG, OREGOS. La FATrrrs Lase. ' Jcige L. Ijocouaht JQAl-rE & LOUGHARY, Attorneys ct Counselors at Law Jiotthtifj, Oregon. AV ill practice in all the court of Oregon. Of fice in the Tarlur-lVilKra ttock. MRS. Zff. BOYB7 -DEALER IS CHOICE- Family Groceries, DISHES, Books and Children's Toys. A FULL LINE OF- Frnils, Kule, Frencli Candies, Confectionery Canned Goods, Coffees, Teas, Etc IMPORTED KM WST CIGAKS. CHOICE BRANDS OP CIGAH8 ILL. P. HE YD ON, Comity tfurvoyor. nud iotnry public. Orncr: In Court House I Hnlm fnr Siirrorlni? and Field NOICI should bo addressed to Will P.IIcjdon, County Sur; vcyor, Iloscburg, or. TO. CRAWFORD, Attorney nt Law, Room S.Uarstcrs Building, - ROSEBURG, OR. BuiIncst before th U. S. Land Offlco and mining cases a specialty. Late Receiver U, S. Land Office. P. BRIGGS, U. 8. Deputy Mineral Surveyor nnd otnr" Public. Orrtci: County Jail Building, up stairs. Srcctal attention paid to Transfers and conveyances. Address. ROSEBURG, OR. JYBA BROWN, M. J., Plsician and Surgeon. Chrcaic Elssass cf Wcaea a Specialty. OKcc, Up Stairs, in the Marks Building. Itcsldence. Hi Cess Street, ROSEBU RG. L. MILLER, M. D., Surgeon and Homoeopathic Physician, fcJJ-Chnmie dunM a peeiattf. AN AFTER- THOUGHT. TO-DAY after Christmas you will iosiu!y diR cover Uiat you have Uought of evetybody and everything ex cept jour feet, as if SHOES in winter were a secondary matter! If toot purse looks weak and consump tive after the Xtnas campaign come to oar 6tore. A enm that wouldn't buy a poor pairofshoed in Eomc places buys a pood pair at our store. PARROTT BROS. EXCLUSIVE BOOT AND SHOE DEALERS 324 Jackson 5treet, R0SE8URQ, OREGON. J. F. BARKER & CO. GROCERS. TEAS A SPECIALTY. A aptciAl biand J tuudnlterated Tea, prise Oar corr Is havinz a large salt, "r styles ot Glass and Delf Ware At astonishing low int. Oar own canned Tomauea are very popular. Salem Nursery Co. W. D. AlcGEE, Proprietor. WE notr have a large stock ol fine, large, I healthy trees ol all kinds. Including Apple, Fear-, Peach, I'mne and Cherry, which I rm fmarftntrwl tniR to name and free from in-1 sects, and vi'. sold at very reasonable rates. I All persons aesinng irees soum yiij n E. L. GOODRIDGE, Agent, CANYONVILLE, OR. Fabefs Golden Female Pills. For Female Irregular 1 ties: nothlngllkethcm on tho mutet. titter jail. Successlullrused by prominent ladles monthly. Guaranteed to relieve suppressed menstruation. SURE! SAFE! CERTAIN! Don't bo humbugged. Kavo Time. Health, and money itake no oth er. Sent to anr address secure br mail on re ceipt 01 price, iiw. Address, THE APHRO MEDICINE COMPANY, A. SALZMAN, (SucccsMir to J. JASKULEK.) ' Practical : Watchmaker, : DEALER IS WATCHES, CLOCKS, JKWUMtY. AN1 KAWCY COOUS. Orouiiiiiu jtSraasiliuu JbJyo . COMH.CTR, STOCK OK Cnllety, Notions, Tobacco, Ciptrs antl SmokprH1 Atticlef. Also Proprietor and Manager of J I i We have an Exceptional Fine Line of " Pad And in fact Everything in the Builders' Hardware Iaine CHURCHILL, WOOLLEY & KNZiE mi. AGENTS STUDEBAKER WAGONS If Business is Not Good The Plaindealer's Are the Rooters for the Business Hen of Douglas County. SHEET T. MUSIC. and He 40,000 AT 10 Mailed to any address Catalogue of this immense We have also secured the agency of the Wiley B. Allen Co T, K. RICHARDSON, a THE THIRD ADDITI0R BK00K5IDE. The IToiVG Farm, ted and is now on the market 3, 20, 30, and 40 acres, ranging in price from $25 to $100 per acre. Any one wanting a or a suburban home can terms. All lots sold in First than doubled in value. The the future. More fortunes are made in lauds near a grow ing town or city than any other way. Sieze the oppor tunity. For information or Estate Office, or on Cr T. Jeweler : ami : Optician. CiiaN.scH iiikI spettieleH Uosolmrg's Famous Hai-Rain Store. r- i OCJSe door locks. .i -1 and OLIVER PLOWS. Don't Squea!, But Root. Advertising Columns It is now well understood that K. Ricahrrson is the best cs 9) tablished and most reliable Piano Orffan dealer in the State has secured the American agency and will soon receive PIEbES SHEET MtJSIC GTS. PER COPY. for .One Cent Extra. stock sent free on application be tu7 ac 7 ohseh5T. east of town, has been plat in Lots and Blocks containing fruit, vegetable or chicken farm now be accommodated on easy Brookside addition have more prospect is much better for conveyance, call at onv Rea BELtBEIff. Fropr. I Good 3r CooKiog is essential to Digest!?- in pastry you cannot have js citlicr without a goal sliort cning. Lanl has always had verv objectionable features. causitiR indigestion and blcs. Science has come to the assistance of the cook, and of weak stomachs, with the new shortening, It is composed of thschoic- & tcst beef enst and Mylity pj refined 'vcgctabl 2 oil, ia gj many respects as gootl ns gj the finest intportcd olive gi $ oil. Physicians endorse it, ? cooking experts re com- g 3' niend it, and thousands C- 2 an now using it in prefer- ij ence to any other shorten- g ing. llcfuscallsubstitutcs. 5 Bend tbrv crtta In rtampa tn X. tC llilrtsat .: C..rhleax f r Imii'l S i comiCcttclrmCocIt Itin tnniaH- )t 3 Inijrlx tiundrvvl n-cipe- -.Klt-y V nlcccmlnen: aatho." it. f 5 CottoIeaclSMktU, . fr 3 Madff c !y by I h. s. m:bl: k & co & t ST. LO'JiS end I CHICAGO, NCViYORK, B03TCN.p .socn'ufic urerii: ration a AbieliiisBulsam wiasireneaa, CahrrrilhssiriCM: 2ndSortEyts.lt K EL-nisBaftsun KfiHSWT BREAHL' by r fc' " Sold by A. C. Marters & Co. W0 L, Douglas S3 CUnlT IS THE BEST. V9 WslWEsinTFOB AKINC. S. CORDOVAN, 4.S3S1 FlKECAtf iKMEATOl 3.50 P0UCE.3 SOLES. SS?S2.V0RK!NGMN' EXTRA FINE- 52.17 BWS'SCrmSSEi LVJ3IES. "tat v. send ran catai ccur W-L-DOUGLA3 BOClCTOttMA3S. Over One Million People wear tho W. L, Douglas $3 & $4 Shoes Allourshocsare equally satisfactory Tbty give the best value for the money. They equal custom shoes In style and fit. Thtir uearlnK qualities ore unsurpassed. The prices are uniform.o.stampeu on sole. l-rssi m Uij savcaoveroiner makes. it ycur ecu unsc: supply you tre car, told by dealers everywhere. Vantcd, agent to take exclusive sale for this vicinity. Write at once. This exrri ordlnarv Ea- Coajtipatlon, Diciners, Foiling Bmh-satlont.NerT-oustirltching of ths eyes and other parts. Strengthens, Invigorates and tones tho entire svstcml JuTcnator is tno most wondorXnl discovery of tho nse. It has been en dorsed by tho men of Kuropo and America. Hudran is able? TCgO- HuSian stops Prefflatoeness of tho dls- crjorgo in 20 'laysT Cures LOST Hudran curcj o e o 1 1 1 1 y, Nctvonincss, Emissions anrtiJsveioHs and restores weak organs. Pains in tho back, losses by day or sight stopped MANHOOD Mil qtilcily. Orcr 2,000 pdvatQudarwments. Prcmatanaurvii means htlpotcncy in tho first stoEC. it Is a symptom of seminal weakness and barrenness. It can bo stopped In 20 days &7 tho usoof Hudyan. Tho now discovery was made by tho Special isttofthaoIdfamousHudson Medical Institute. It is tho strongest vital lzcr made. It is very powerful, but harmless. Bold for Sl.CO a pack RsoorG packages for 15.00 (plain scaled boxes J. Written guarantco given for a cure. IfyQUlwj: six Doxcsaaq aro not cnurciy curea.&ix mora will bo cnt to you fteo of nil thi Bend for rircularsand testimonials. Address OnUDSON MEDICAI, INSTITUTE, Junction Stockton, .Unrkct dc U1M St. San Francisco, Cal. Ml (nrr m 1 1' Jabbott'sJ ? -I EBST Pi I' I Corn Paint I J Curos CORNS, BUNIONS and WARTS SPEEDILY and' WITHOUT PAIW. & FOR SALE BYALL DRUGGISTS. T LIPPMAN BROTHEES, Iprep'rs, & Llppman't Dlock. SAVANNAH, OA. DIRECT ELECTION OF SENATOHS Undoabtodly. tho scundnlous rienit torial ileadloelf of thu lust fow yoarw, which left ho ln ihiiu tlirco Ktil?s only half repruKi-nlHled in tho sonato ut once, not to Bponk of novprhl uphii toiiiil election more nbituiuful than doadlockr, will yivo htrong impetus to the public opinion fast forming in favor of choiro of henatOfK directly by tho ueoplu nt yeuerul tilec.tious. This will bo a slow reform, boennse they who profit by the present sys tem "United Statos iieiiatorrf and members of Htato leiiislatnrea are entrenched directly in its path. Tho reform can be brought about only by an amend men l to tho const itntion. To make I hie, assent is reqnirod of two third of the senators ami threc fomtha of thu M1U0 legislatures. This Htsseiit will bo given only under ubsolntn popular compulsion. The house uf ropriwentatives has ! adopted twice a joint ri-s-oliilitin for ! finl)ii)isiou of htich an auiendmeut to (lie coii!.lil ut ion to the MhL-k Tho tirsl t i in. it wa. rejvclfd ty tho fien alc. and now the heualo couitnitteo on tho Mibject liaa again made an un favorable report. Xo tnatti-r how rtrge a majority such a 1 loiioiiliunj may seenru in tho lower branch, most of the sonalora will oppv it, a! thotigh'it ia not without advocates in that branch. Tho whole force of tra-.litiqu uud precedent i.sou (ho side of the existing system, and ihin ia ro 'nforced by the practical objections to a chaogo of not a few senators, who liHTo Miccecdeii in getting elec ted by a legislature, b.it do:i!it whether they would be aa fortunate if ihey Mibmilled their cJi.iin.-. di reelly ! ihn people. Tui- amtntl ineut tiwr will pas the bciiatn uiilii men ar w.it i Iiti abwilutel v .If dgi'd and iusiruct'(l lo iipnrt it. This ni'ver can l:o ilono until ih'- unwilliugnei-a of the .state l'"i--!;itiir s to see tho change mutle s-ball ! ! come bj the Mime popular mandate. Oi.j-ositii.ti to ihe change in Mill more strongly intrenched in .vute legilaluren than iu thu ena:i V- U, siuco it would take from Iho former a function always important rnd hODlluie lucrative. It tuav le taken for granted that tin le-r;sla- wnl not move 111 Ihi-. matter, except . 1 1 , . 1 as mey are unveil ty tue people. lint it is certain that popular feeling nnon this subject ia gaining strength, mill it ia probable t lint it will soon make itself felt in thu politic? of the various states. . .r Nearly every biennial ititervai wit- lie.-MT, two tt lUt'ee. Uea.lIot'KS, m uliioh the puti'is- l)nine-H siilferj trout me niiiii- ul i';iii in irui'ie'.s iialloiimg. and li!. mote from ihe absorption of mind-, m tho fcuat-iin ami lutngmtig ttiatg-ion Irom .ify A 1 T . to tiny, it may no rogantea cs settled that no legislature ill do the wo:k of lawmakiiii; mi well when it bus In eleel a renator and does not reach a choice promptly, a in a se siou when no snch or.esliou is np. Moreover, a seuatoria! deadlcok may be prolonged to ihe enn of the ses sion and leave a state without oie of its senators for t wo years, ihis hap pened iu three stales iu 1893, and nnd may happeu in two or three this year Tho pojplo will not endnre this mfliciion far long. They will issuu a mandate to both tMrties to consent fo election of senators bv popular vote. Oregonian. Tlir. WHEAT OUTLOOK. Call: It ij au open secret that the last active work of ihe late Ex-Sena tor Fair was studying the pospects of the wheat market, and calculating now tno taeis woum atiect prices when they became generally known Thneo wtio keep clo?t watch of the figures are aware that the ayerage nainiiil coiisumjitiou of bread-eaters being 4 38 bushel- per head, the quautily required for the world's consumption in ISOo.flti wtil l2.fr2i 000.000 bushfls.'Jt!. against 2.177,000,- 000 required iu 1S81 S2. To supply this increased demand there has been an incren.-e f the votlti'.s uheM growing area of 5,G0O.O(Kl acres i.nly wnicu, at uie asceriaituii aveagt yield, w.l! give an ivciease of 70.UC0, 000 bushels, whieh is 27S,0C0,0O0 buslUds less than the increased aim , ... ot consumers win remit re. ll-te !. a jfrospect of a detieii. which will be pretlv s.iio to exhaut an tin'silo reserves from the hnnnttfu! crops the pa-t foiv tehVv Jf we hml, closer into d,-tnil ti same comlitious cou.'iout tw. One, tue ieavon a.-signo. t tor iiio le-ioie in wheat which tins mi.v laie-l for year was the aiiiioiinc.ciueiii il-it ih, Fronch crop of c!H was uiiniiilly Itrge, auioiinting li..".'1.0iH),(:0J bush eiH, or anout as mucli a- l ranee con Htuues. lt! now the Freneli trade journals announce that the fl ntr con tents of the wlieat is so low that the crop is equivalent only to one of 305,000,000 buhels of sound grain, so that France will still be obliged to import from California and III" grain status east of 'Mountains. Then again it was announced that the Argentine crop uf 1S9-1-5 was only 8 per cent short of that of 1893-04, but now it turns out that tho short age ia fully 25 per cent. In viow of the dullness of wheat at the late un- prccedentoii decliiio theso Ugutea lire iostrtictivo aa showing how slow cote- mercinl markots are to respond to the lav of snpply and demand when ihe snrronndiug circumlances nre nu favorable to bnoyane Whent iq Helling at Chicago and-New York and San Francisco for less than tho cost of "production, when the figures of supply and demand show that it hould be yielding a handsome profit o the farmer. MYSTERIOUS EYES. ColonclJagsoagavo his friends and cronies a terrible, shock lost week. Tho colonol had celebrated the dying of tho old year in trno Jagsonian Btylo and started for homo when tho infant 1805 was only threo hours old, carrying a load that was heavy even for so expert a vehicle as tho Jagsqn anatomy. Then tho surprise came. When tho old boy appeared later in tho day and took his usual scat alongsido tho old. guard, a tumbler of "straight"- was at once, brought All tho others raised their glasses, murmured "Happy New Year I" sinking the last syllablo into tho glasses as they quaffed tho rare old brew, and then looked at Jagson. There sat tho veteran, but his hand bad not touched tho glass. Silently ho reached forth, and taking a tumbler full of water ho slow ly drank. Consternation but feebly ex presses the feelings of tho old guard. -Jagson drinking water, and that, too, on New Year's dayl What had hap pened? Eager inquiries brought no satisfac tion to anxious friends. No; I've not sworn off," said Jag son. "Never coins to drink any more?" asked tho old guard in chorus. I may, replied tho hero of many a tusslo with old red eye. "Sick?" again camo from tho chorus. "No," camo from between tho colo nel's tightly compressed lips, and with a curt "Good dayl" ho strode Majestic ally from tho cafe This action brought dismay. The old guard's ranks were already depleted. Only four now rendezvoused daily, and Jagson's defection meant more to tho survivors than can well bo understood by outsiders. ISeverthelcss, despite all tho efforts of entreaty and solicitous inquiry, tho colo nel remained a total abstainer. He came daily to join his comrades, to gossip and swap stories, but never once did ho be tray, by word or sign, tho reason that led him to abjnro tho winowhen it wa3 red or tho bowl when ft was flowing. Thus affairs ran on. Tho Old Guard was troubled, and Colonel Jason look ed worried nnd acted like a man over-! burdened with serious thought and a deep financial disorder. Tho fear that Colonel Jagson was caught in tho finan cial stringency induced General Soake to tako his wifo into his confidence. With that tact and intuition that arc woman's chief charm she went at once to call cm -Mrs. Jagson, and -with tho usual result sho got tho root of tho trouble in short order, ilrs. Jagson was positively radiant. Tho colonel was al ways sober, tho household allowanco had been increased, tho table boro mora deli cacies of tho season, her wardrobe and bonnets were new, and ilrs. Jagson be gan to think that tho declining years of her married stato would bo happier than tho earlier period. "And how did it all come about?" quoth Mrs. Soake. Now, Mrs. Jagson knew that Mrs. Soako had suffered from tho same rivalry that sho herself had endured, and that soft pity to which femininity is so prono swept over her, ,and sho gavo tho cause of the reforma tion away to her menu. "You know, my dear Mrs. Soake," began Mrs. Jagson, "tho colonel camo homo just before daylight on New Year's morning and was not quito himself. Tho conviviality had proved too much for his equilibrium, but after much fumbling ho got tho door opened and came up stairs as softly as circumstances would permit. Contrary to my usual custom, I had pnt tho light in his ream entirely out. Ho seemed unablo to find a inatcli and evidently tried to go to bed in tho dark. Faint rumblings and mutterings caught my attention, then a wild roar. I rnshed in to find him on tho floor craspinc at tho carpet. When tho gas was lighted, ho became quiet, went to bed, and I left him in tho dark again. "A second tinio ho called and asked mo to sit with him in tho light I did so until ho fell asleep. Tho next morn ing ho felt that socio explanation was due, I suppose, and told mo that bright spots liko twinkling cyc3 had peered at him from tho floor about tho bed, and when ho tried to grab ono nothing was there. You may bo assured Colonel Jag son was badly frightened at tho effects ,of his overindulgence, and from that day to this ho has not tasted liquor of any kind." "But tho explanation, my dear Mrs. Jagson!" cried tho excited Mrs. Soake. "Well, you must keep it secret If tho truth bo found out, tho colonol might go back to drinking again. It was this way: Yon see, I'd been having tho colonel's room cleaned and fancied, only fancied, yon know, that tho bed might havo somo of thoso little pests lurking in tho crevices, so I told tho girl to nso a phosphorus powder, 'and she carelessly let somo sift onto tho car pet. Of course, in tho dark it shono bright, and that is all thero is to tho 'eyes' that haunted tho colonol." "Jnst phosphorus bedbug powder!" exclaimed the wifo of tho old guards man, who had not stopped sipping tho cheering bowl In more than 40 years. "Just think of it I Broken from a habit of so long a timo by 25 cents' worth of bedbug poison I I shall go and get'somo immediately." Thus bubbling with eagerness tho lit tlo woman rushed into tho chill atmoa. phero of tho outer world aiu into tho arms of her dearest friend, Mrs. Major Evcrfull. So tho secret was told to ono uioro a.nd was received again with rap ture. Things began to look sad for tho old guard. With theso deterrqiis,ed women on tho trail, and ono man already in captivo chains red eyo bourbon and ap plejack, were doomed. Tho next day, when tho -roup of old tiniors were gath ered for tho morning nips, General Soako said to tho waitor: "Guess I'll have somo apqUinaris. km't feel very well today." Don't feel very well today. uufcauu BKiugur .no uauiswasasnoci:, ; Or. Strango ami have it done by an ex Soako falling a victim to the mineral, j perienced and skillful dentist. All work habit was a calamity, but 7hea Major guaranteed and at very reasonable prices Evcrf nil calmly, but with a quiver in his voice, said, "Vichy, please,' the bottom dropped out of everything. Everfull sighed and put his hand wearily to his eyes, as thouglt to blot out somo horriblo sight Jagson leaned forward, and gazed at the major, and General Soako seemed fascinated by the trivial action of his friend. One moment wa3 given to thought, and then Jagson blurted ont: "Do your oyes trouble you?" Thus encouraged tho general looked from tho major to the colonel, then from tho colonel to tho major, and in a hoarse whisper breathed: "Seen anything queer?" Tho major and colonel stiffened and seemed like wooden men. Their aston ishment was so great they just bad strength to gasp: "What did yon seo?" "Spots, by Georgo, sir, shining spots, liko devil's oyes last night in my bed room." "So did I," quoth tho major in alarm. "I saw them days ago," chimed in Jagson. "That's why I stopped drink ing." "Gentlemen," interjected the fourth member of tho Old Guard, Mr. Deep tank by name "gentlemen, my wife yesterday received calls from Mrs. Ma jor Everfull and Mrs. General Soake, and later in tho day Mrs. Colonel Jag Eon came" "Nothing rcmarkablo in that," said Soake. "Old friends, ain't they?" quoth Jag son. "What's that got to do -with devil's eyes?" put in EverfnlL "No offense, gentlemen, no offense at all, I assure you, but I think X seo the solution of this mystery. I am willing to sacrifice myself on tho altar of loyalty to you, and tonight I will go homo so ber hem but will pretend I'm a little bit hit iu tho weather eye er will stumble up the stairs, just acting, you know, gentlemen, but on my honor I'll be clear in tho top story. A sacrifice to do it, gentlemen, but tho circumstances require forgctfulness cf self." With wonder tho party broke up to meet next morning. What has Deep tank discovered that will lift this awful pall? was tho thought of tho threo af flicted men as they wearily toddled home. Could tho world ever come right again? Meanwhile tho shades of night hjd fallen, the hours crept on apace, but Mr. Dceptank thought not of home. He had a mission to perform, and, though sit ting up until 2 a. ia. was nothing to him, sitting up without grog was de cidedly unpleasant Nevertheless ho fought tho battle and won the fight Faithfully ho refrained from nightcaps, and when the hour of 3 arrived hn heaved a mighty sigh, buttoned his coat and made a line for home. When with in sight of his domicile, ho pnt on as natural a jag gait as ono would wish to sea Ho knew Mrs. Deep tank had often told him sho could see Tiirn staggering along, as sho put it, and now she should havo a chacco to see him stagger. "Too bad to deceive tho wife of one's boiom, ' ' met toed, tho victim of loyalty. "Too bad, bnt it's a good cause," and then ho began to ascend tho stops with an imitation of profound alcoholism as realistic in its effect as any pen nine Deeptank jag ever was. The keynote was finally found, and Deeptank began to havo histrionic aspirations. Thero was no ono as yet to appreciate his abili ties as an actor, but within himself ho felt that elation which great actors say is tho highest reward cf tho art Dceptank was tho last to arrivo the next day at tho meeting place. He took his whisky plain, as usual, but about his oyes was an unusual twinkle, and in his hand he carried a small round wood en box. "Gentlemen, " ho began in his snare, apologetic voice, "I havo made a dis covery. A deep conspiracy has been laid by our wives pardon me, gentlemen, but hear me a deep -conspiracy, I say, has been hatched to break down tho cus toms of our friendship, to destroy our pleasure in life. As you know, I had a theory yesterday. That theory today is a fact Last night I saw those shiny spots liko devil's eyes, bat I was perf etrt ly sure of my senses pardon mo agan, gentlemen and called upon my better half for an explanation. Sho couid see nothing, of courso, but after msnffer ings, gentlemen, I was not to 1 pat off that way, and as a result I hold in my hand tho solution of tho mystery. My wifo confessed to tho wholo plot when she discovered I was not qv under the influence. Tha spots wcra made by sprinkling phosphorescent powder on tie floor. Tho powder is not made to ifval tho Keeloy cure, bat for tho destrostion of tho bedbug. Hero is the box, bearing its own inscription." Silently tho box was passed to Gen eral Soake. Ho adjusted his glasses, read tho label, and in tones loud and clear yelled, "Waiter, my usual decoc tion!" By tho timo tho drink was brought Colonel Jagson had perused the catered inscription, sniffed at tho contents of tho box and accepted the explanation, and ho demanded of tho waiter why his usual drink was not there. Then Major Everfull tumbled into, line. The toast wtis drunk in silence, but tho cye3 of- threo of tho party were turned with thankfulness, tp the hero who had mado life again worth living. That night Mrs. Jagson realized that tho surest way to have a secret kept is not to tell it to ono's dearest friend, but tho Old Guard is happy and nover,speaka of phosphorus. Now York Sun. I Bound to HaTo It, Mrs. Gotthere My dear, pardon my frankness, but really I fear your daugh ter can never bo a social success. Mrs. Owtsydo Why? Mrs. G. Well, she, has no no aplomb at all. Mrs. aIs thai all? She shall have one. Mo and John will spare no expense with Molliov Sho shall havo tho best articlo of, tip whatover it is that can bo had.-r-Pittsburg Bulletin. Wayne Jones is special tsrm agent for the "old re'iabh" Coaiiaeiital Insurance Company of New York, which hasbeeu tested by j:iii; through and raying all of itfe losses in that reat conflagration of Chicago in 1S71, by which oyer one hun dred companies equal in the State Insur ance Company n( &eMn, Ore. failed. A word to the w rse is sufficient. If vo want the best oJ dentistry go to Western Breach, Box27,rOETLAND, on