:..v - ii V-r -"-c. J OREGON CITY o Vol. OREGJOIY CITY, OREGOX, SATURDAY , FEBRUARY 1, 1S6S. lie False One. J BAD POLICY TO PAY RENT. f OVERLAND SCESERl . FARMER STATE $)c taJcdilij (Enterprise. o 0. IRELAND, V. the Court Howse, Oregon City, Oregon. Term of Subscription. Oat copr, one year in advance $S 00 il delayed 4 00 T-wm of Advertising transient adrertisements, per square (12 linesor less) first insertion ---2Y ' "For each subsequent insertion 100 (Business Cards one square per annum ' payable quarterly " JO Oite column per annum Ij'J w On half column " 0 One quarter " " - - : 'J Legal adTertising at the established rates. :SoFanOobPrinting ! rpilK EXTEBPBISE OFFICE wii pvat-v reauisite for doimj . superior style of work, and is constant- ly acciwnUtin?tsw and beautiful styles o of material, and is prepared for every Tariff ty of POOK ANT) JOB PRIiVTIlVa! AT SATISFACTOKT TRICKS. 353-The Public are invited to call and examine both our specimens and facilities for doing wort. PROFESSIONAL CARDS. Dr. F. Barclay, M. R. C L. (Formerly Surgeon to the lion. II. B. Co.) OFFICE: At Retidtnee, Main Street ?- Oregon City. Dr. CHARLES BLACH, Physician, Surgeon and Accoucheur. OFFICE Corner of Washington aud Front streets, Parrish's Block, Portland, Oregon. RESIDENCE Washington street, between Fourth and Fifth streets. 22.1y 0. P. MASON, iAttoexev and Counselor at Law, 102Q?ront St., Portland, Oregon. -firiM. ATTEND TO BUSINESS IN ANY VV Court iu the Stats or Washington Territory. Including business under the JSankrup't Law. S7.IJ D. 111. McKENNEY, Attorney and Counsellor at Late. V9 Uh ATTEND PROMPTLY TO ALL W business entrusted to his care. O-ricu One door north of Bell &. Parker's irb store, Oregon City, Oregon. 3:ly .A. C. GIBBS. C. w- PARRISn, Xutiry Pullic and Com. of L'ecds. GIBBS. & PARRISH, Attorneys and Counselors at Law, 0 PORTLAND, OREGON. OFFICE On Alder street, in Cart;r's TKvr Brick Block. n3 w. c. jomxsos. r. o. ii cows. Notary I'ublic. JOHNSON 6lo1IcC0WN, OREGON CITY, OREGON. ' Z'-T Will attn5 t all business entrusted 4. our care in aiy of the Courts of the State, f.illect money, egouat-e teaus, 6ell real es Stite, etc. Of rpai ticularttentioH gireD to contested Irtud cases. l vl r. RfSSSLL. F. DAXTOX. RUSSEl-l- & DALTON, jAiorneys and Counselors at Law, Solicitors An Chancery, and Real Justais Ayents. Will practice'tn the Courts of the second, uird and fourth Judieiitl Ttstncta, and in the tJuprerae Court of (Sir pen. I-?"" Speiul attention piven "to t?te collec tion of cluiwis stall poiutsin the above nain d districts. Otlice in ParrislTs eriok "bcilSing, Albany, Orcnon: (? K. HITCDKLL. J. S. tH.IH. A.SMITH. G Mitchell, Dolph & Saitb, Attorneys and Vonnselhrs at Law, Solicitors in Chancery, and Proc tors in Admiralty. t5f Oflice o-er the old PostCfBce, Front atreet, Portland, Oregon. BENTON XILLIN, Ortgon UT Ortgoa. (Ec in Charmau's Brick Block, up tairs. (5)-.t0 JAMES M. MOORE, Justice of the Peace tfr City Recorder. Office In the Court House and City Council Room, Oregon City. Will attend to the acknowledgment cf - deeds, and all other duties appertaining to 'the uliice of Justice of the Peace. 2:ly " J. B. UPTON, Attorney and Cocnselor'AtLaw, Oregon City, Oregon. lf OfTice over the store of Pope & Co., MiiiOtreet. 4-.tf C. A. DOLPH, Attorney and Cocnsellob at-Law, f5jr- OlGce 106 Front street, Tortland, Ore gon. (40.6m C. P, FERRY, (Late Ferry & Foster,) ZC ( J31&. JBB2 No. 108 Front street, Portland. Agent North British and Mercantile Insurance Company. And Manhattan Life Insurance Co GOVERNMENT SECURITIES, STOCKS Bonds, and B)Cal Estate bought and old on Commission. f 3 : 1 J J. A. MacDONALD, Green Street Oswrego, Oregon. Post faster and Dealer in G E N E 11A L MERCHANDISE, r Orocrrlrs, Wines and Liquor t ' Fred. Muller, Original Paxaratta -n Uecs to announce 10 nis oia V customers and the public, that His New Restavrant, - . BUSINESS CARDS. CLIFF HOUSE. 5ri- Main Street. ml nil lira Nearly Opposite Woolen Factory, W. I WHITE, t - , T.W. RUOADES, ) Proprietors. Oregon City, Oregon. We invite the citizens of Oregon City, and the traveling public, to give us a share of their patronage. Meals can be had at all hours, to please the most fastidious. 15 Notice to the Public. I HAVE this day closed the Barlow House in favor of the Cliff House. Hope mv old customers will give their liberal patron age to the above well kept house. They will tind Messrs. White fc Hhondes always on hand to make guests comfortable. WM. BARLOW. Oregon City, August 1, 13G7. OREGON HOUSE, Main Street Oregon City. JACOB B0EHM, Proprietor. ESTABLISHED 1S57. REDIXTIOX I3f PRICKS t The undersigned wishes to give notice that from Saturday, October 5th, 1S67, prices at the above house will be as follows : Board and Lodging per week 5 00 Board without Lodging 4 00 Board and Lodging per dav 1 00 JACOB BOEHM. Oregon City, Oct. 3d, 1867. 50:tf AMERICAN EXCHANGE. X. 84 Front street, Pcirtluiul Oregon. L. P. W. QUIMI5Y, Proprietor., (Latt of Western HvUl.) This house is the most commodious in the State, newly furnished, and it will be the en deavor of the proprietor to make his guests comfortable. The Baggnsje Wagon will al ways be found at the land'ng on the arrival of steamships and river boats, carrying bag gage to the house free of charge. 17.1r OSWEGO HOUSE! OSWEGO, OREGON. JOHN SCHADE Proprietor, IS now prepared to receive and entertain all who mfiy favor him with their patron age. The House is New and the Rooms are Newly and Neatly Furnished. The Table will be supplied with all the delicacies of the season. The House is situated near the steamer landing. The proprietor will at all times endeavor to give entire satisfaction to all who may favor him with a call, and would respectfully solicit the patronage of the Traveling I'ublic. 41:tf. Board per week J 5 00 Board and Lodging 6 00 Simile Meals 50 ImpcrjU&i Mills, OUEGON CITY. KEEP CONSTANTLY OX HAND FOR SALE : BRA N A XD CHICKEN FEED ! Jf Parties wanting feed must furnish their sacks. SO.tf john hTTcITram, Manufacturer and Dealer in SADDLES, HARNESS, etc., etc.. Main street, between Third aud Fourth, Oregon City. r"MIE attention of parties desiring anything 1 in my line, is directed to my stock, be fore making purchases elsewhere. (ly) JOHN H.SCHRAM. AV. F. HIGHFIELD, Established since lSl'.i, at the old stand, Main Street, Oregon Citt. An assortment of Watches, Jew elry, and Seth Thomas' weight Clocks, all of which are warranted to be as represented. Kcpai rings done on snort notice. and thankful for past favors. (37 I. S. ROSENBAUM & Co., No. 45 Front st., Portland Oregon. WHOLESALE DE.VLBR3 IX Tobacco, Cigars, Snuff", Stationery, Yankee Notions, and Toys. Orders promptly attended to. (4.tf A, J.! MARSHALL, Vagon and Carriage Maker, Main street, Oregon City. Wagons made to order, snd all work in this line executed in the most satisfactory manner, at reasonable rates. if All kinds of country producetaken in exchange for work, at cash prices. Give me a trial. 47:tf William Broughton, CONTRA CTOR BUILDER, Main street-, Vrpen Hjiiy. Will attend to all work in his iir.es Con sisting in part of Carpenter and Joiner work framing, buildiDg, etc. Jobbing promptly attended to. (52 SHADES SALOON, West Side Main, Street, between Second and Third, Ortgon -CU-p. GEORGE A HAAS Proprietor. Tfec proprietor begs teav to inform bin friends and the public generally that the above named popular saloon is open for their accommodation, witha new and well assort ed supply of the finest brands of Wines liquors and cigars. 52 J. c. mans. tiios. Least. Fashion Billiard Saloon. Main street, between Second and Third, Oregon City. MANN & LEARV Proprietors. THE above long established and popular Saloon is yet a favorite resort, and as only the choicest brands o( Wines, Liquors and Citf-ars are dispensed to customers a share of the public patronage is solicited. N. H. Families supplied with the choicest Liquors, English Ale and Porter in bottles, on the most reasonable terms. A. H. BELL. X. A. r-ARKEBU BELL &, PARKER. I RUGG1STS, AND ?AIEM IN Chemicals, Patent Medicines, Paints, Perfumery, Oils, Varnishes, And every article kept in a Drug Store. S3.) Main Strest, Oregon Citt. L. ZIGLER & SON., : rv jt rn "sn ir a cr J J W Jtt. JCj A 9 Oregon City, Oregon. THE UNDERSIGNED ARE NOW PRE pared to make all manner of ware in the line of cooperage, from a well-bucket to a hogshead, of both bilge and straight work, on short notice, and at reasonable rates. Call and examine samples of our work, as it is itown recommendation. 3.tO L ZHiLCR Jr EO ill The Forsaken to tUc False O I dare thee to forget me ! Go; wander where thou wilt, Thy hand upon the vessel's helm, Or on the sabre's hilt ; Away ! thou art free, o 'er land or sea. Go. rush to dangers brink But, oh! thou canst not fly from thought, Thy curse will be to think 1 Remember me, remember all My long, enduring love, That linked itself to perfidy, The vulture and the dove! Remember, in thy utmost need, I never onee did shrink, But clung to thee confidingly ; Thy curse will be to think I Then go! that thought shall render thee A dastard in the fight : That thought, when thou art tempest-tost, Will fill the with affright! In some dark dungeon niayst thou lie, And counting evch cold link That binds thee to captivity Thy curse will be to think! Go, seek the merry banquet hall Where younger maidens bloom, The thought of me shall make thee there Endure a deeper gloom : That thought shall turn the bitter cup To poison while you drink And while false smiles are on thy cheek, Thy curse will be to think ! Forget me ! false one, hope it not ! When minstrels touch the string, The memory of other days Will gall thee when they sing ! The melodies I used to love, Will make thy conscience shrink, Aye, every note will have its sting Thy curse will be to think ! Forget me! no that shall not be ; I'll haunt thee In thy sleep ; In dreams thou 'It cling to slimy rocks That overhang the deep Thou"lt shriek for aid, my feeble arm Shall hurl thee from the brink ! And when thou wak'st in wild dismay Thy curse vill be to think! Influences of tlie Moon. The moon is thouzht by old wires to infl ueuce the life of a child. Thus the child born on the first day of the new moon is fortunate in all its uti- dertnkings, and will live long; one born on the fifth day will be vain and deceitful; and one born the sixth will live long; one born on the seventh will have a life of trouble; one born on the ninth will be rich; one born on the tenth will be a great traveler; one born on the eleventh will be a devotee to religion; one born on the sixteenth will be grate ful and unfortunate; one born on the eighteenth will be brave; one born on the nineteenth will be full of malice; one born on the twenty. first will be strong and healthy, but selfish; one born on the twenty-second will be cheerful, bnt inclined to low society; one born on the twenty-third will be ungovernable, will forsake family and friends, and wander in a foreign country unhappy through life; one born on the twenty .fourth will have extraordinary ability; one born on the twenty-fifth will be desperately wicked and come to a fearful death; one born on the twenty seventh will be amiable; one born on the thirtieth will have the acme of all good gifts, temporal and spiritual. A baby's nails must never be cut till it is a year old, or it will be a thief. A child with a blue vein across its nose will never wear its wedding clothes; should it chance to outlive its infancy it will bring sor row and disgrace to all belonging to it. A babe that cries at its christen ing will live rong$ if you bathe it on Sunday it will be sorrow free if on Wednesday it will grow beautiful; if on Thursday it will grow fat; if on Friday all its sins will be forgiven; if on Saturday it will be unhealthy. There are certain other superstU Irons applying to grown people If you cut your nails on Sunday, it provokes Monsieur le Diable to such a degree that he'll shave you all the week, and lead you into mischief. If you clip your hair at the hew moon, it will grow long at the full; as the moon wanes your hair will fall out. If you don Dew clothes on a Sunday youll be happy; if on Mon.. day they'll tear; if on a Tuesday, they Ml bum; if on a Wednesday, you'll have plentyj if on a Friday, you'll be unlucky; if on a Saturday, you won't live to enjoy them. Every one, silently or openly, is a little suspicious regarding Friday yet few could give a reason Among the signs of growth iu Italy is the application of the co operative system in Venice. A pla card has just appeared oa the walls of that city inviting the working classes to join a co-operative store. Its primary object is to buy oil, flour, rice, and other provisions at wholesale prices, and then to sell them at a small profit, pledging that the money will be refunded in a giv en time s-.v thirtr tear. We do not mean if you agree to but bad policy to agree to do it Any man who is able to pay rent can build a house. This will strike you as a bold proposition, and one hard to prove bat reason with us. It is hardly our interest to discourage che renting of houses, but we will waive interest and go for principal. First, You say you have no lot. Lease one then, or buy one on time. You have no lumber or material. You are paying from $100 to $200 per annum torrent. When you pay it it's gone, and at the end of two or three years you have paid out enough to build a house, but still you are a renter. All you need is to anticipate these payments say for a year bor row out of a bauk or otherwise, and give your rising building as security for enough to buy the lumber put up the frame for : say four rooms finish one or two to live in, instead of paying rent. Now, finish them one by one, as you are able, and in two or three years time you can be gin to pay for your leased lot and own it yourself. Next, You are afraid of mortgages you say. Why, mortgages are the poor man's friend. They are like the life boat to a wreck, for a man who is debt. They build all our railroads, and great internal improvements They are perfectly harm.es?, if you only understand them. Mortgages are foreclosed sometimes but then, you have time in which to redeem, and any kind of a financier, who will work, can keep ahead of them. If you will pay the interest promptly, which yon can do easier than to pay rent, your mortgage will not be apt to be foreclosed. It you are sharp you can play with them like Ilerr Dries bach and the lions, and they won't bite you. Moreover, robbing Peter to pay Paul is not robbery, if Peter is willing, and will lend you the mon ey on a new mortgage to pay off the old one and there arc always Peters who live by doing just this kind of business. The process of knocking an old mortgage oa the head, whenever it grows ugly and threatens violence, is a familiar one to all good financiers. Use your wits. Work more with head, and you need not work so much with your hands. The richest men in the world are those who commenced on nothing and have lifted themselves up by their boot straps. Localize this proposi tion if you please pick out the most wealthy in your own immediate neigh borhood, and then say we are not correct if you can. These i4the!it men have all of them financiered like our Radicals without money. Issue your bonds, give the road-bed and superstructure of your new house as security and gO ahead. But here again, some nice yoiYng man answers that his richer associates and friends will snub him if he lives in that style. Here is a great error of young men, and we wish to call particular attention to it. They can not stand to be " socially tabooed." Our experience shows that the taboo ing are generally inferior in brains to the tabooed. It is in the highest de gree foolish to even wish to commence life in as elegant style as our fathers lived after twenty .five year's hard la bor, and yet, this is the too common error of the age the prolific sonrce of celibacy and bachelorhood which operates as a fraud upon good looking girls, who are cheated out of hus bands by it. Young friend but more especially our young married friends act inde-pendently--take a longer look at things--$wJ the znubbers, mnd make ihim sick of it-! and ia five years or less you will be bowed to and courted by the same class of men. The good will of such is purchased at too dear a price. It is not worth having. You are a coward a toady. You are willing to sell your home and in dependence for weak and unmanly sentimentalist!!. afe to follow your own line of policy, if it is honest,and for your interest to do so, and not al low weak aud snobbish pride to con sign you to hard labor for life-, as the tenant and vassal of your landlord. By following this advice the thous ands of dollars you would give away fer rent in ten years, and have noth ing to show for, will give you a home of comfort and elegance, with a wife and family, and all the " influence" of our respected citizens. " This is the way, walk ye in it." It leads to inde pendence, respectability and honor. No person who has ever crossed the plains, from the Missouri to the Pacific, has the least scruples about saying that the scenery on the overland route outrivals the most fa mous of Europeau note: Speakiug of the "Niagara of the West" the Desret Evening News, published at Salt Lake City, says : A week ago, Mr. C. R. Savage, of the firm of Savage & Ottinger, went north to obtain by photographic pro cess, pictures of some of the finest scenes at and around the vicinity of Snake river falls. The result of his trip appears in a series of views, which are entitled to rank very high as works of art for their delicacy of outline, and the exquisite manner in which they are toned, the manipula tion being very superior. But apart from their superiority as works of art, these views are interesting and valuable for the scenes represented. The great west is still to a considera ble extent unexplored ; and its beau ties and sublime scenery, now com paratively unknown, will in a few years attract the attention of thou sands of sight-seers, tourists, and earth-wanderers, who tired of the oft looked at scenery of Italy and Switz erland, will seek the wonderful and sublime in nature now hidden in the Rocky Mountains, yet to be devel oped. Here, in the views before us, is the " Niagara of the West," the great Snake River Falls, the savage grand eur and wild sublimity of which are almost indescribable. Snake river, or the Lewis Fork of the Columbia, winding its way in a north-westerly direction, suddenly reaches and dash es over a full of thirty feet, its vol ume being broken into half a dozen streams by dark rocks rushing out of its flood. A little farther on, di viding into three streams, It bounds down a wall of rocks some sixty feet in depth; while still a li'.tle farther on, its waters suddenly narrowed to about four hundred feet, the v. hc'.c river leaps in one unbroken body down a precipice of two hundred and ten feet. The ever rising mist, with its changing prismatic hues the wild leap of the mad river down into the abyss beneath ; the frowning and jutting rocks of black and grey, which cast their shadows over the sluggish, leaden-looking water, that seems ex hausted after its desperate leap; the dark look of the towering banks which rise a thousand feet above the river; and the deafening rear which ever meets the ear, combine to form a picture of nature's power, sublimity and grandeur, before which man can only stand awe-struck, filled with rev erence and admiration. These Falls are four miles from the crossing of Rock creek, on the coach road be tween this city and Boise-, the capital ot Idaho. Another view is that 'Of the rising of the Unknown river a marvel in nature which will attract many a tourist. It pushes out of the bank of Snake river Valley, hear the Over land ferry, with a volume equal to that of Big Cottonw'ood, and empties into the river. Then follow scenes at and round Bear river bridge, including the bridge, the hotel of Godbe & Ilamp ton, and the office of Wells, Fargo 6z Co., at Bear river north. The hotel is as much fioer looking building than one would expect to see in such a 1c cality, being bUiltof rock, two stories high, and beautifully finished; and is presided over by our well known citizen, Ben. Hampton, Esq. The bridge, also erected by Messrs. Gods be of this city and Nichols oF Box Elder, is a substantial looking and apparently well built structure, judg ing by the sharp and well defined photograph of it, which has been made. But the points cf greatest interest are those first mentioned, least kuown, and now for the first time photographed, though, we believe, they have been sketched before. Messrs. Savage & Ottinger deserve credit for their enterprise in giving to the world, for the first time, cor. rect views of these scenes and marvels of nature, which may be expected to be soon much sought after by those who admire nature in her wildest and most sublime moodsv The public will be interested in knowirg that tho great Shoshone falls, or Snake river falls, and the ab sorbingly interesting natural wonders which abound in that region, can be reached, within a short distance, by Wells, Fargo Sz Co.'s regular coaches on the northern line. FARMER STATESMEN'. Nearly all the successors of Wash ington, in the Presidency of the United States, both the deceased and the livinc, passed or are passing their closing years in the dignified tran quility of rural pursuits. One of the most distinguished of them, Mr. Jef ferson, invented the hill-side plough. Adams, Calhoun, Clay and Webster, forgot the collossal anxieties, the stern contentions, the herculean la bors and the thankless sacrifices of the public service, in the retirement of the country, and the calm and healthful pursuits of agriculture. One of these four great men it was not my fortune personally to behold in the enjoyment of these calm and ra tional pleasures,said Edward Everett, but I well remember hearing him say with a radiant counlenace, that there was nothing in the triumph or honors of public life so grateful to his feel ings as his return to his home in Carolina, at the close of the session of Congress, when every individual on his plantation, not excepting the humblest, came out to bid him wel come and to receive the cordial pres sure of his hand. 1 was often the witness of the heartfelt satisfaction which Mr. Adams enjoyed on his ancestral acres, especially in con templating the trees planted by him self, thousands of which are now scattered over the estate. While he ministered in this way to the p-ratifi-cation and service of other times, he felt that he was discharging no small portion of the debt which each gener ation owes to its successors. Adopt ing a tree a the device of his seal, he added to it a3 the expressive motto, the words which Cicero quotes with approbation from an ancient Latin poet, Alteri saculo. Mr. Adams took particular pleasure in watching the growth cf some white maples, the tteds of which he had gathered as they dropped from parent trees in front of that venerable hall in Philadelphia, which echoed to his honored father's voice in the great argument of American Independence. At Ashland, in 1S20, I rode over his extensive farm, with the illustrious orator and statesman of the WestJ and as the "swinish multitude," at tracted by the salt which he liberally scattered from his pocket, came run ning about us, in the beautiful wood land pasture, carpeted with that fu mous Kentucky blue grass, he good humoredly crmpared them to the ofiice seekers, who hurry to Wash., ington, at the commencement ol an administration, attracted by the well flavored relish of a good salary. Mr. Webster, reposing on his farm, at; Marshfield, from the toils of the fo rum, and the conflicts of the Senate, resembled the mighty ocean, which he so much loved, which, after as saulting the cloudy battlement of the sky, with all the seething artillery of his furious billows, when the gentle i south-west winds sings truce to the elemental war, calls home his rolling mountains to their peaceful level, and mirrors the gracious heavens in this glassy bosom. Cromlech. M. de Closmadeuc has discovered, writes the New York Tribune, in a small desert island in the Bay of Morbihan, France, a very fine Cromlech, containing more than sixty obelisks of granite, forming a regular circle of 180 meters in cir cumference. A curious fact is, that only one-half of this Cromlech, which is supposed to have been a Drudical altar, is now on dry land, owing to the encroachment of the sea. M. de Closmadeuc has made large excava tions in the neighborhood, and dis covered an enormous quantity of pottery, similar to that found in Celtic monuments, several hundred flints worked by man, as well as a large number of stone hatchets. The manufacture of artificial fuel from Consolidated coal-dust, al though commercially unsuccessful in this country, has met with a very different result abroad. Twenty es tablishments in France produce an nually 500,000 tons. In Belgium seven manufacturers turn out 400,000 tons, while in other countries the produce, though lessj is very consid erable. Sir Frederick Bruce usually de sired to ride in other cars than those filled with smokers and chewers. Whenever he travelled he was under the ludicrous necessity of taking his cook with him as a means of obtain ing admittance to the ladies' car. " That's the rock on Which we split,'' said Charley to his wife, when he asked hicn to rock the cradle. ."SOLD. Fun is always observed on board a steamer where there are jolly of ficers. The following is no doubt true, to the core, and is so like some of our good natured acquaintances ; on board" that it might almost as well be adopted as an Oregon joke: The story is that a popular co median, of whom nothing turther need be said than that he is fast los ing his early pretensions to shape and beauty, and that his name is Tom, once npon a time and, if there be any curiosity as to season, we might as well say " during the Fall'' was descending the Mississippi, in fine spirits, and a sporting coat. There were divers queer characters on board of the steamer, with whom Tom, while amusing himself with their peculiarities, was withal a great favorite, but none of them " cottoii'd''' to him more kindly than an elderly " hoosier," from the innermost depths of Indiana, who was visiting New Orleans for the first lime This russet-looking antique, whether it was from the coemdian's sporting buttons, or his habit of concluding a controversy with " I'll bet you," etc., fully made up his mind that Tom was a " gentleman sportsman," and wherever he raw a " small game" going on he was careful in noting the skiil and quality of the players, the " size of the pile," etc., and bring ing Tom the items. The ''gentle man sportsman" was very much obliged, of course, though 1-3 didn't exactly know what to make of it, when, one day, the confidential hoosier took him aside, told him that there was a " smart chance of a pile" on one of the tables, and that, if he liked, he (the hoosier) would " go in with him in cahoot'' Tom was very much amused at this, but told his proposing partner that he was mistaken; that tha fancy coat covered not -a " sportsman,' but a player. "Swan to grccicus!" exclaimed the old contriver, ''one of them fel lers that tumbles! Seen 'em, once, raore'n half naked, cuttiiv up, down to Madison-!''" Tom didn't trouble himself much ia explaining the difference between a theatrical show aud a circus show, but told the story of the cards, etc.. about the boat, rendering the old fel low quite an object of interest to the passengers. Next to the card-plays ing, tha object of anxiety to the hoosier was a very large and singu larly shaped nice box, which lay in the "Social Hall," containing noth- ing more nor less than a big fiddle, and which was owned by a very re served and gloomy-looking fjerman, on his way South, professionally. " Plass," aid the hoosier he was thrice familiar with Tom, after learn ing that he belonged to a show " what on airth hev they got in that box It's the onhnmanist shape I ever see in all creation!" " Hush," said Tom, mysteriously; " don't you know1?'' " No! I'm nighly dead a gu'essin'!" Bodies!" whispered the come dian, with a Strong expression of Joathing. " Bodies!" echoed the startled in quirer; "not ra'al human bodies!" " Bodies!" repeated Tom, at the same time applying his handkerchief to his nose; " taking them down for dissection; belong to a doctor On board." The hoosier tuVned away, opening his eyes and shutting his nose. At length, he inquired if they were " Niggers." " White woman and two Children," was the reply ; " one on each Side of her accounts for the shape of the box." At this moment tho haggard, un shaven violinist approached, and the thoroughly " sawed" victim made way for him, as if he had been the cholera incarnate! " Goes about diggin' on 'em up, does he?" said he, between his teeth, aud in a suppressed voice: " Why t'll breed pison!" and out he went, on the "guard"' to take a long breath. Tom told this joke, also, amon?; the passengers, who carried it on, highly amused; making wide circuits whenever they had to approach the box, using their handkerchiefs, and expressing much indignation at the captain for permitting that descrip tion of freight to be brought under the hoses of his passengers. Some talked of leaving the boat, and others of lynching the doctor, till at length the captain, who had also been put np to the fun, approached the crowd, then gi the red about the bar. " Phew!" sniffed the captain, " it . very warm here, gentlemen; phew!" and he pulled out his handkerchief. " Gentlemen, isn't there something unpleasant about here!" " Pretends not to know what itisP' muttered the hoosier aside. " Barkeeper," continued the cap tain, " what the deuce is it phew so queer here!" " Reckon you don't know?" ex claimed the hoosier, stepping forward, and almost quivering with indigna tion. " Know! certainly not," said the captain, " Wall, you've got that box too near the stove, that's all!" A perfect scream of laughter rath er stomped the old fellow; but a re moval of " the lid of the coffin" was necessary before he could be con vinced that the body, indeed, was only that of " Old Rosin the0Bow." He paid ' the liqnors" willingly, " cussin" his old cat for not remem bering that " Plass" was one of the " show-folk varmints!" Very Dry Joke Iu Easton, Pa., lately just as a performance in the public hall was about to end, two wags o put themselves in front ofthe door with an umbrella and waited for the oatcoming crowd. It was not rain ing at all, but when tha first persons of the audience had reached the door and seen the warning umbrella, scores of hands were thrust out, coats were buttoned closely, and dresses taken up, while quite a number remained in the hall, refusing to come out on account of the rgm. The"seL" was complete. A good story is told of camp meeting John Allen: At a social gath ering of ministers of different church es, a Baptist brother made a display of objections to the Methodist pol icy because, as he said, "there was too much machinery to it." "Yes, responded brother Allen, "there is a good deal of machinery, but it don't take so much wster to run it, as the Baptist dees " o Sarah Jenning?, wife of Marl, borough, wrote to the Duke of Son erest when he offered her ejnarriagei q " If I were young and handsome as I was, instead of old and faded as I am, and you could Jay the empire of the world at my feet, you should never share tV.e heart and hard that once belonged to JiShn, Duke of q Marlborough." "What do you call this?7' said Jones, lapping his breakfast With his fork. "Call it?" snarled the landlady, 'what doyott call it ?" V.Weil, really," said Jones, reflect ively, "I don't know. There is hardly hair enough in it for mor tar, but there is to much if intended for hash." A little girl was vtry fond of preaching to her dolls. IIermother heard her one day reproving one for being so wicked. "Oh, you naugh ty, sinful child," she said, shaking the waxen limbs, "you will just go to that lake of brimstone and molasses, you won't burn up--you'll just siz zlel'1 - lhe latest improvement ira stock is a new breed of cats in Ye mont, which have tails only an &iclt long. The advantages claimed for such are, that they caunot get under a rocking chair or be stepped uponP and that the door can be closed quick er when they go out. What can be a more desolate spectacle than an old maid sitting on an inverted half bushel, in a coldo kitchen, with her feet on the brim of a slop bucket, paring her corns with a case knife, by the light of a tallow candle? The ancients tell us that during the sojournment In Paradise, heaven sent down twelve baskets of talk, and while Adam was cueing three of them, Eve snatched up the other. nine. Connecticut is forming a cora paay to manufacture a wood-sawing machine and grindstone combined. When the saw gets duli it is, sharp ened on the grindstone. o . A damsel in Boston lately bor rowed five hundred dollars, and gave- herself as " collateral.' The note ha one year to run. o o -The Austrian Emperor's effort to keep tho schools independent of the Catholic clergy have made hint popular. . , Paul Weber, formerly a Phila delphia painter, is now teacher o drawing to the Princess Alice, t i , I o (2 O 0 O O Two doors frora Alder, on First street, Fort V 1 nd, is now open. V; f i o f I