BE eitttwel ! w 99tL MB wjeim Tje HJhptQpn B Wmtm. - ,, - ty.--.m- -tssjwmh. ,- u . M,IWI"''W""WWIWlfaMWMIIWMMMMcMlt i . - VOL-.MM. ii i T. !. ("Ji,0CSSHILLEMlEGOS, SATURDAY, MAY 1, 1858. j r Independent on nil duff ecH. and ifiJ to the best Intirtflt , Soulhtrn Orrgtp, Published T.'vury Saturday, O.T'rAUOT.Sitor&frtfrklir. TUKIUSt Jno onr,8 O'JjSIx Meittb, $8 09, aurcu Aionius, &. UU. AlVfelttHRmntttH. Ono Square- of flwcho lines or lew, rst la- St OU ' WOSCejWBKlBSief UCfl, tr'tfit NO. 16. I1,KM 0-mos,Mhquiro.or mo yw, A liberal discount rWtocrsonTwliHtasj toadrortlso to the eiUntoffjur "SIITIIH" Job Printing Office. r Iir. Proprietor, having a goad Tart 1 cty of JO!) T1TU oa haad. I r pircd todonllklndsof PLAIN AND ORNAMENTAL. JOR PRINTING, On the SHORTKST NOTICE, anl on Hn i-ot REASONABLE TKRMB J eueh m Hook, n rampulots, Circular, Handbills.. Showbills,, Concert'Dllls, Programmes, Ball Tlcksta, Jllll Heads, Address Can, UuilneM Card, tfrc, $:., $:. Job work done la AXD ma, mw& oa intuit to suit customers, Orders wlWted, Business GTar&s "TbiTdorado 1UIWARP AND DRINKING SALOON, conxE)orcAMrORUAxuoRx(HxinrttCETi!r JACKSONVILLE, 0.. nr DBSBbKHEHB" HrVHHnnaLsLLDLLLLBfiiK. nflBH HrWwiLmBLLHLLHH wIiHIHb' wpvw ffl .tIv1' WmWTt.' , JfjHH 4tf& 9BrTK3MHHWli riPilmH&j&JaB v M iijLLLLVQBXsPrr' tVwT flE1 iW fBBH aWBBflaBflaVBaHBflaWV sY 1W I TK. . V "iBaW MTBHBaVBmBPliFK TW . T i- MHLBBBYWlBa tfti , aw.ni-k'yuiw.n'ffr?HOMWi EFi T KvGftv tiij 'H immM RvaHpn im 7v'HpCV'1iLILLHf 9HflsiiflMr ;; ; XBiuuBn. 9WkvOL :,rtalSaw5j (MHOi a . nHMBJHmHsW M5u2flfljfljiB IrSBSrk JWHBtTKIMMM JHrtHt el tk Jl(t!Htloil. " tV "" "ijJ- y ,'.AlfcHlancc 6cutWtihHn!i tlio gloo- fiot 1770-7. W4&JMW not found way Ul alttotler. 'aLMc ) wo copy i.'m tMMber f mJfmei'rat!c lle U u eflBMHaaaTlM Swiy tlurlnc (loa, ybMi aaiiMMj'tP bo provl I fttlotRiMts la nt fevr. Tlio wrl hr rMtfred tbo nccouat ef )l fmm n son of I IMmtI M, Lu, and freM'frftaclit Mglilfoot i, wi were measitw of CfUgrcw, nnd rhlUdrlUavaiIMUQio. Tbeso jnMaattM.Riu(Ion Itos IMllinlniit RilMWir or their "aalfy r . iWhaa UmnA W44fl 111 wts retreat Ing ttroogfci4 Jarocy hi t &Ur of 177C-7 wi W CfMitii Mm rfawvrels lend and Md. Marly MM, noi ho would le bU, wllhwit a.cDWera)o supply, to mM tat VrlllUnt ami anful more- mha ricoTarwl Ke Jifioy, nnd ro- tfeo aauatry wlkfc hw lionc nnd SnaWam In ttlf Caawaaa-larJii-Clilcf In that aarktit hour of Hi war Congress lnd erery tfutl to wf.'o somucb. artkla. ll Mm bad that could bo found k pabltc sl aflrak akecs tin.il been eMalncd. led tacsja atn melted audi Hwiiilati lorn froai'tfMMMfeofhouiciij but illl a mdaII qwHa;a4jr ionl'd Ik obtain- I. Juit thw In aw 4aHtel moment ofi X F1W1 Wltll tlio l'. Tho folbTtlng. wo think, wns pnbllshfd In the Gol n Kra scvernl yenrs ngo. No mat ter; Ills worth sending on another Journey through ncntpaperdotn. It Is certainly tho most Ingenious specimen of nlllternttnu In the langungo, nnd quite throws tho "SlfRii of Ilclgradc" Into tho ihmlo. Tho tltth) folks, nnd some of tho older, will rccogultc It ns a fanciful rendering of tho old story of "llcnuty nnd the Ilcnsl:'' A famous flih factor found himself father of flro flirting females Fanny, 1'lorcncc, 1'rrnnndo, Frnnewca nnJ Kcnclln. Tho tlrat four wcro ilnUfcnturcd, Ill-favored, forbid dlng-f.iecit freckled frumpi, fretful, flippant, foolish nd fiountlng, rcncll.t was n (Inn featured, fresh, fleet-footed flry frank, free, nd full of fun. Tho fisher failed, and win forced by flcklo fortune to forego I1I1 footman, forfeit his forefather's lino field, nnd UnJ a forlorn furmhouso in a forsaken forest. Tho four fretful females, fond of figuring nt feasts In feathers nnd faihlonnblo finery, fumed nt their fugitive father. For saken by fulsome, flattering fortune-hunters, who followed them when they first flourish td, Fcnulla fondled her father, lla-ored their food, forgot her flattering followers, and frolicked In frlcio without flounces. The father, finding hlmielf forced to furngo In foreign parts for a fortuuo, found he could m II. I. IITIIH' Billiard Saloon, Oppoilto Iloglo Motel, KEKUYVILI.E. O. T. .nusry I, 1&j8. llf DRS. BROOKS & THOMPSON, riiysicians and Surgeons, OFFICK 'Jackionvlllo Drug Hiore" oppoiia Union llouso. Qy'A constant supply of Drugs and 1'iimt MeJicines always on hand. Tke PrallKMl' Kefttra. Hard by tartsbold sat the rite, .jnoBaa tfMtt ka not nor For eeoraa on BMatory' sstiifafal toa " " IsaalM j ., '- Wcro bfaatalac of l aateatM.ftoaiHMM A willing exll, Maws aloat Tht eh Wil. hmlU ulMxl tJm, . . "JiTT "' -.:.- V .'T.' 135" . m .i ;, B IIIIIMON', lata of Sacramento. II. J. IJIUTT, San Fraucleco. nAHHON & LADAH. LAAV OFFICE, Vomer of Montgomery awl Commer cial Sitrttti, (Over Hanks & Hull, Hankers, Hun Frnucisco, Cnl, , 'II. J Lab att, Commissioner for Louisiana novUbnlbtr It. B. SNELLING, ATTOUNEY-AT-LAW, OFFIOI--On Main Street, four doors south or tho l'ost Office, Yreka. &r Will practlco In tho District Courts of Jackson County. O. T. 2 29tf R. HAYDEN, Attorney mid Counsellor at Late, Wll.l. ATTEND TO UU8INESH in tho Third Judicial District of Oro gon. OFFICE At Kerbyvillo, Oregon. Janua llf W. G T'VAULT, AUornoyand Counsellor at Law. nd Notary rubllo for Jackson Co., Will practlco in the Supreme and Din. '(riet Courts of tho Territory. Dfiico adjoining the I'rinting Office, ffackionvillo. O.T. llf D. H BEENAN, ATTOTliNE Y-AT-LA W. frFFICK At his resi'dnca, Jsrkson. ville, O. T. 13 AND A5BBBWt?2. Aro takeu by IPETER BRITT, On the tho Hill, near the old Parsonage, JACKSONVILLE, O. T, Utf With untiring gazo his eye li bent Far o'er the distant plain, Ills ear to distant sounds nttent, As If ucre beard again The echoing of coming feat Nay, nay, 'twas but wicrd fancy's cbcatl Yet lore wltbln that old man's breast Keep eager watch to-night, And will not glvo tho eyelids rest, For, surohls tea --dimmed sight A distant shadow doth descry A speck, u sbapo that drawcth sigh I Oh. fond embracol oh, gushing tears I Oh, loro that finds not rprrch I Ob. lote that counts not days nor years, liut through all timo doth reach I Oh, lore that question not tho past, Hut welcomes back to homo at last I S. l Bulletin. With 11 Bottlo of Cider. Old friend, accept this bottle Your mouth then open wider, First to Imbibe, then to oxclalm Hy Georgol what glorious elder. Perhaps romo fair young damsel. Whoso looks hare no'er belled her, Will not object to take a swig, When you aro down be elder. And If she thus Indulges, You may bare to cutdo her: But sbo will say it is owlnir to Tho stuff which is in elder. Distrust. And shall we all condemn, and all distrust. nccause some men are raise, ami some u nustl Forbid It, Heaven I for better 'twere tc,be Duptd of the fond Impossibility Of light and rodiuDco which elcep'd vIons Than thus to lire suspicion's bltler slsve. J)iri. jvoritn. fiTho Atlantic Monthly snyst-A young minister who bod made himself con spicuous for a severo and denunciatory stylo of preaching, went to an old minister to in. qulro why he did not have more success. 'Why, man," said tho doctor, "can't you tako a lesson of the fisherman t How do you go to work if you want tocatcha trout? You get a little hook and a fine line, you bait It carefully, and throw It in as gently as possibly, and tbcu you set and wait and humor your fish till you can pet him ashore. Now you get n great cod book and ropo line, and thrash it Into tbo water, and bawl out, IJItoor bo dawned!' " .sir A New York punster challenged n sick inan'ivoto at a recent election, on the ground that ho was an legal voter. Perhaps It -was the same person wIk chal lenged a squint-eyed voter, because he nas not natural tytt-td. jar "Please, sir, I don't think Mr, Doslra takes his physic reg'lar," said a doctor's boy to his employer, "Why so?" "Cause vy, he's getting ell 10 prcclout fast!" UsjiondsnDy, fcc-bart XcVrlswho has been j "fr'11 n farlll'nB to hl fondlings. Tho first sllul the "HaaacWr" of tW Kovoliillon.li four wcro fain to foster their frlvolty with andwhoMCXteMtfecraiMt ibd mercantile1 'f"J f"" "t to flnM. their father's transactions In EarasVaad wboso unfllnch- fluani ; Fcnelln, fearful or flooring him, log devotion to ale country, las laid thatli k10'1 n tmc' for a rul1' fttth ,lo,vcr' Folc conatry aadr Berar-cmiB, obligations,'1'""1"10 "'wor for n few day, when wcTtdal4UrllrosB6neorUl.lIwvl,IM,, "e ibii in wiiu u log ins laitmul J-Vleifi bad escaped Use WrltU tfalswa-lnformlng1 r,,ollUr Altered, nnd foot-fnllcd He found hlmtaatthq vaml wsa'.wltfcki tbocnpei,l-''Ira,c,r,n front f fortified fortress. Find. nig 11 lurraKcu, auu lecllug lilmsctr rceblc nnd forlorn with fasting, ho fed on tho fish, flesh nnd fowl he found, frlccassed and fried, nnd, when full, fell flat on tho floor. Fresh In the forenoon, ho forthwith lluw to the fruitful field, nnd not forgetting Fcnclln, he tlicrica a ralr flower; when a foul, frightful, fiendish flguro flashed forth: "Felonious Macrk a4 saatqr satsaaiw repaired to the' , fingering my flowers, I'll finish you! wbatfaKsbMat; laaktsirMit for tho eirect- 1 uo' ' ,arew your fine felicitous farn 4 vtai. IFarsaaMMsM abUld not np- and would raaeh l'filWjU nt such n mi " ww a(Mif tvm lean, nuu ataaaaWas; le a vkjt UffsqHwitlty. This kMw'Hw iwaiteta.Wefris fr such wo do. lit to aatl bias systvaJ lata In the day, and altar CaagraatlHHl s3jwnd. He Joy oaaly lasWaiaa, Uta 'taWrfio could see bafera uwrakf. 3brly tbe atnt morning, aaar. TM.iaiiuaswfaastsid la tho hall with "aau smsswass,aajl anitlio oisenib H tea IiaM, ta IsataV af Morris was ral, aad UMlUd-sW'sHaalv.was enircrlr afrcteu. iltrria wa laaTxlous to ro asaln In hU seat ta'HsaTlIewa? and bo ro- it. iu Hia wLarr, atrataiBf tus eyes iionn the river. At length tho goodly vessel heaves la sight, and her owner recognises 100 stnrs and stripes. Tho nows spreads rapidly through tho city and reaches Con- gresj, nnd a scene of Joyful emotion Instan tly succeeds, and the hearts of these clari ons, bdorcd men, send up to heaven their gratefU tbanksgitlng, for the rellof about to be received Iu the hour of despair. The ihlp arrived, tallailed with lead, which tie Captain of his own apparent will, (but niour fathers piously believed, by tho leadlngofn good Providence.) had for tho Mint tine, resolved to use for that purpose iiy uocs overruling provldenco the vessel escaped the perils of storm and capture, and arrived at tbo exigent moment : a largo uppl of lead was Immediately obtained, and our great Commander ro-crossed the felon-arc, and saved our couutry. Lms Deo. WiMTru'a RKPonts. Ono evening, not nany years ago, while tho Supremo.Court Eras holding Its session In Somerset county, lown In tho State of Maine, some of tho le gal brethren were warming their legs before a blazing fire Iu a rural tavcru, nnd conver sing upon various matters pertaining to the profession, U J, liacon. whose long silence indicated that his inlud was in travail with some great thought, broke out by asking If any or his brethren could relieve him from tls trouble. "I wish," said he, "to comraenco an action against a boy who was caught stealing ap ples. 1 una no case of tho kind in any of our Keports, ana I am at a loss for a prece dent." The landlord overheard tho question, nnd Informed tho verdant youth that he knew a case Just In point. "AM" said Dacon, "in whoso Reports shall I find it t" "In Webster's," said tho landlord gravely. "Webster's Reports!" replied Bacon. "Well, now you speak of It, I think I do ro member something like it there. Do you know tho volume I" "Yes, I do; I havo a copy In the house, if you would like to see It." "I would be greatly obliged to you for It. as I have left mine nt home." Tbo landlord stepped out, and soon re turned with Webster's Spelling Book I and, turning to the story, "An old man found a rude boy ou one of his trees, stealing ap ples," passed the book to his legal friend, who threw it Into tho-flre, iu the midst of roars of laughter, and speedily mode his exit." fe(U A man's happiness is said to hang upou a ttireau. inn must uo mo thread that is never at hand to sew ou tho shirt button that Is always off. Hy, nnd face mo In a furtnliiht 1" Tho faint- hearted fisher fumed nnd fullered, nnd fust was far In his flight. Ills five daughters flew to fall at his feet, nnd fervently fcllcltnto him. Frankly and fluently he uuMdcd his rate. Fcutlla, forthwith fortified by filial fondness, followed her father's footsteps, and flung her faultless format tho foot of tho frlghful figure, who forgnvo the father, and fell flat on his face, for ho had fervently fallen In a fiery fit of love for the fair Fo nclla. Ho feasted her till, fascinated by his faithfulness, she forgot tho ferocity of bid face, form und features, and frankly and fondly fixed Friday, fifth of February, for the affair to come off. Thero was festivity, fragrance, finery, fireworks, frlccassed frogs, fritters, fish, flesh, fowl and fermentry frontignao, flip and fare fit for the fastidious; fruit, fuss, flambeaux, four fat fiddlers and flfera; and tho frightful form of thefortu nato and frumpish fiend fell from blm, and be fell nt Fcnella's feet, a fair-favored, fine, frank freeman of the forest. Behold the fruits of filial affection I C'iiii X Help You r Can I help you I Just nay tho word. There speaks the whole-souled, whole-hearted man tho mnn whose very shadow Is worth more than tho whole body, soul and estate, personal nnd spiritual, of two-thirds of our human race bearing the name. How he lifts the desponding spirit of his brother In troublo ! All day ho had mot with cold eyes, cold smiles, cojd words, cold bows nnd cold sympathy. Men fly blm because they have heard ho was unfortunate; nnd boa villain, a thief, n murderer, snys tho world In action, -but duu't. be. unfortunate. I'll lend you ten thousnnd If you hro worth fif ty 5 Ifyou'rc unfortunate, I'm poor myself would help you could have dono so three days ago, or threo hours ngo hut positively haven't got three cents, nor shan't bo In pos session of that nmount while your misfor tune InMs. ir your old aunt dies, or your old uncle, or In fact anybody who chooses to lenvo you n fortune, why, Just call on mo; I'll mnnngo to havo a llttla change on hand. But look I yonder comes a broad-sboul-dcrcd, frank-browed man, who meets a poor brother with n slap on tho shoulder, and, Can I help you ? just Hay tho word. Don't bo nfrnld now wlint'a your trouble I Out with It, nnd if you'd llko ft llttlo ensh, just say so. Don't bo down-cast 5 what If you havo fulled In your expectations once, twice, orthrlcol Haven't soma of our most suc ccssAil merchants, done tho samo thing? mado the samo mistakes ? And where would they have been If they hadn't found friends? Come, what do you want how much T Ho don't clap his hands In his pockets with a Styx-llku frown, that says ns plainly ns If hu had brawled It out In your car, No en trance here. lie Is not one of those dyspep- that squeezes a slxpenco till It squalls, and rends a nowspnper with a greedy, voracious eagerness, for fear he shall not get his two cent's worth. He lives for something olsu than mnn, than gain. Ills passport-to Heav en Is written on bis face, his religion on the hearts of the downcast and sorrowing In tho homes hu has mado happy by his benev olence "Cnn 1 help your" Write the words In golden letters, for they are only heard on rare occasions. The sneer, the scorn, tho doubt, the refusal they come with every night-full and sun-rising. Nig gards grow llko mushrooms, but ntigels nre. scarce. Mggards can never look beyond themselves their own comfort their own convenience; no matter who starves next door, they scatter curses in discouragements and blight over, God only knows, how many gentle hearts. They caver say, "Cnn I help him!" but, "He's doan-let's kick him." But tho angelic ministry of thoso helpers they consist In nn exhlbl'Ion of the person, they arc llnble to bo attended with vanity, nnd to extinguish the blush of youthful tim idity, which is in young Indies the mot powerful of their exterior charms. And I am nlso satisfied Hint, If a young1 woman cannot partake af the amusements of n ball room, except nt tho expense of bcncrolrncc. of friendship, of sincerity, of pood humor, she has no business there. The recreation of others may bo innocent, but to her It Is sin." AnotT a CniLn wuo Reap 1 Yei.iaw CoLonmi PniLiCATioN. Soma years ago w 0 knew n beautiful little girl, who tvns resid ing with her parents In San Francisco. She was tlicn thirteen ycurs (if age with n faco fresh, bright nnd pure as tho budding rose- fa form graceful, nnd Instinct with Innocent ( life hair luxuriant, and golden ns the sun light. I.lttlo Mary was beloved by all who I know her tho sweetest flower in the thriv ing nursery of Mr and Mrs.. Every facility of education was afforded her, nnd jtho displayed extraordinary capacity. No .touch upon the piano sounded so dollcato ns 1 hers j no volco so pleasant 1n the slmplu 'melodies In which she delighted ; nnd no ex pression seemed so sweet as hers when shu J looked up trustingly and confidingly In our faco. and smiled or wept ns we told her sto ries of good works accomplished and terrible sufferings endured by brave and good peo ple Well, wo loved little Mary; but one day her father failed, nnd she was taken nnay, and we heard no more of her during four yenrs though we often thought of the child, nnd wondered whether we should ever know her again as wo used to know her. jTho other evening we heard of her. Wo Iwcre sitting In our room, and by chaucit thinking of tho little glrl.iu'hcn n note was tic, cross-grained, surly, moneyed machines .brought to us-a note directed In a light. Hint ........... . .lr..... till It ...II. ....l'l. ... . trembling hand, as though tbo writer wan under tho Influence of some strong emotion or settled misery. Wo opened It ; it won blotted with tears, and tbo scrawl was Irre gular nnd almost Illegible. Wo Anally mado out the contents to be about as follows: Mv Di:An I-'niKsn. I may -call .you dear, yet. though I am lost nnd sunken, now. Lost nnd sunken degraded Oh! Stretch ed on a bed from which I feel I shall never rise again. Oh J my dear, dear friend, you used to love littio Mary whcu.hcr.rya was bright and her faco fulr; you will not desert her now, though sho Is withered nnd worn I brought down very low by dishonor aud lianio. Como to me tho bearer will no ( company you. Prepare to bo shocked I I can't write any more. Minr . On that Monday night wo went to n wretched room on one of tho streets of San - Francisco, and thero wo found illttlo Mary au. A correspondent in the army Is re sponsible for the following : "While our army was In Mexico, Gen. T was walking In the plaza at Taronlco. when a Mexican offered to sell htm a One Mustang pony, which the General, who had n keen oyo for horses, was desirous of pur chasing; but as the owner was Ignorant of English, and tho General's Spanish did not extend beyond if aud tamos, they made slow progress towards a trade. The Gen eral called an orderly to him, a genuine Irishman, and asked: "Orderly, do you speak Spanish t" "Nlver a word, sur." "Theu go and And me some ono that does," Off went the orderly, nnd soon returned, dragging after him a full-blooded and thor oughly frightened Mexican. "What aro you doing with that man?" demanded tbo General ; " what has ho dono ?" "lie has dono nothing as I know of, sur." "Then why do you bring him here t" "Wasn't it a man to spake Spanish Hint tho Olneral would havo tne to bring wid rae?" "Certainly it was." "Will, thin, I thought him the very roan for your honor, for I am sure he can spake nothln' but Spanish at all, at nil !" The General was obliged to admit that the Orderly had obeyed orders to the letter, but It was uo help In buying thomustung. Biikach or Fiiomub. Things get to an awful pass when men In "high places" are reckless to their own engagements) And wo arc sorry to find that tbo chief Magis trate of our NatUnal Union is charged with such an aggtsvdtcd offence. Au exchange says ; "A young American lady la Paris threat ens to sue President Buchanan fur breach of promlso j she says that dining at her father' table years ogo, ho said to her 'My dear Miss, if ever I should bo President, you shall be mistress of the White House.'" 1. i.n..n. . i.- -11 .1 I how ultcrcd. how nenltuut. we cannot toll 1 entrusted with tbo powers tho gods might that nnd tho story she told us,.must remain envy, that they might be used to somo good ,ft ,ccret t0 M but ono who ,s ,n ntcr ,iuim, uui mis wo must say, in a lono 01 solemn warning to hundreds of dear child 'rcu and loving parents that hor ruin was brought about by oue.ycllawvtrcd publi cation. This she sold (his -she charged I us to proclaim. Sho Id buried now. Gold en Era. purpose what shall we say to them ? how glvo them the burning prnlso they merit ? Oood, whole-souled, generous man. tho an gels and God himself emtio approval when, with beaming eyes and hopeful words, said to tho dispirited brother, "Can I help you 1" Exchange. A Cooi. AvoLOur. They had ji ball down at Wavcrly tho other night, which brought out somo remarkablo experience. Amonc other events, the following lnstanco of a cool apology took place 1 Bill P. Is kuowu all over, and Bill was nt this ball In all his glory. All of his neces saries for pleasure were 011 hand good mu sic, pretty girls, aud excellent whisky. Tho evening passed off rapidly, ns It always does, and Hill had at about one o'clock, be come pretty happy. Stepping up to a young lady, he requested tho pleasure of dancing with her. She replied she was engaged. "Well," said Bill, "aro you engaged for tho next sot ?" Sho suld sho was. "Can I danco with you the next, then ?" 'I nil) engaged for that, also." "Can I dauce with you to-night ."' "No, sir," with some hesitancy. "Go to Boston," said Bill, highly indig nant, and turned on his heel. After a few moments Bill Is accosted by the brother of the young lady, nnd charged with insulting hts sister. Bill denies, but professes himself willing to apologize, if he has done wrong, and accordingly steps up to tho lady, when tho following conversa tion ensued : "Miss h., 1 understand I have insulted you?" "You have, sir!" "What did I say, Miss L?I' "You told me to go to Boston." "Well," said Bill, "I hnvo come to tell you that you needn't po " A VAUunu: Opinion Mrs. Washington, the wifo of him who was "first in war, tlrst in peace, and first in the hearts of his coun trymen," ucd to say, "It is perhaps wore desirable that young ladles should play. sing and dauce, only so .well as to iimusc themselves aud their fristWs, than to prac tlco arts In so cmluoot a degreo as to aston Mi the public ; because a great apparent nttentlou to trlvinl accomplishments is lia ble to give 11 suspicion that more alunble acquisitions hne bvin urglccUd. Aud as A CiunGK as is a CirAnaK. Judge Jorah Joles, a Western judicial dignitary, recently delivered the following charge to the jury, In tbo case of L'llm Crunch, on trial for stealing: "Jury, you kin go out, and don't show your ugly mugs here till you find a veidlcf. If you can't find ono of your onu, get tho ono the last jury used." The jury retired, and oftcr an absence of fifteen minutes returned with a. verdict of "Suicide in tho ninth degree and fourth verse." Then Judge Jonah Joles pronounced upon Crunch this sentence : "Ellin Crunch, standi and face theWu slo. You aro found guilty of suicide for stealing. Now, this Court sentences you to pay a fine of two shillings, to sliaicyour head with a bagnuet In the barracks, nnd If you try to cao In the heads f any of the jury, you'll catch thunder, that's all. Your fatowillbo a warning to others; nnd, lu conclusion, may the Lord have mercy on your soul! Sheriff, git nioaj.lut of red eye 1 I'm awful thirsty!" Qpitk a Mistake i.v ak Elopkmknt. A novel mlslako lately occurred in a love af fair at Duancsbiirg. A couplo of young persons agreed to elope together, nnd by somo mistake In the preliminary arrange ments, (he gentlomnn put his ladder up to tho window of the room next to tbo one in which lib sweetheart slept, aud which pro ved to lie that Iu which her anxious mam ma, a handsome w Idow, reposed. She turn ed the wltTc to her own advantage got into his urms returned bis affectionate cm braces was boruo by blm to he carriage, and by preserving becoming alienee until daylight, kept him blind of bis error, and by tho potent power of her blandishment, actually charmed him Into matrimony with herself. We glvo these fuote on tbo author ity of n respectable correspondent. The old lady evidently thought that marriaga was not gord fur her children "it night make them sick." I S.