EUGENE C1TT GUARD.
LUCAXrBUL. freprletwr.
EUGENE CITY. OREGON.
BEATING A BUNCO.
A Orn Coautrrman XtrlSM Itlf Snsp
I t'hleaa' .
It'i curloui feature In human nature
that while a man will peril his life to
assist a stranger who Is being forcibly
robbed, be will turn ahout and dolllit
in seeing that ssme mun taken In and
done for by a "akin" gumo or a bunco
man. On the next bench to u in Lin
coln Park, Chicago, one day last fall,
aat a long, Inan, lank stranger who had
hayseed and onion top scattered all
over him to prove hli hailing place, and
he gave hlmscvf away In every move ha
made. Pretty aoon a slick young mus
approached blra and extended bis hand
and exclaimed:
"Well, well, but bow are you Slo
ven?" "How ar1 ye?" replied the man, as be
looked up In a puzzled way.
"What! Don't you know mo?"
"Why, your face looksklndor famllur,
but I can't place ye."
"Can't place mo! I am William Scott,
nephew of the Judgo of prohato In
llrassvllle! I saw you hundreds of times
in the two yearn I lived with my uncle."
"Oh, yen. I thought I bad aeen you
before. And you know mo right olTV
"The mlnuto I act cyos on you."
"Ilow'a every body down there?"
"All tolcrsblo. You live berer'
"Yea. I look after about fifty house
and atorea here for a capltullst"
'Hlunlil You niunt got big wages."
"Oh, a hundred a week."
"You do! llygum! but you are smart
er than fox trapsl Meblie you can help
tig) to a Job?"
"I think ao. Indeed, I wa going to
make you an offer."
We were on to him from the Htart as
a bunco man, but had no thought of In
terfering. "Hayseed" should take the
papers and keep posted. I
"How would you like to eonie hero
and assist me at a salary of tlOO pur
month?" queried bunco after a bIL
"Je whltuknrl but you don't mean it!"
"I do." !
'tllve us yer band on It! Hay I'll work
all day and sit up all night for tfiom
wages!. Kay, . will yo bind the bargain
right now?" j
"I will. That Is, I H I
"No flunking out now! I've got a hun
dred dollar Mil hero, and I'll give ye
fifty to hind the bargain. Yes, by gosh I
I'll give ye sixty!"
"I was going to say that I ought to
see my employer II rut, but I know it
will be all right. I will take your flu,
but only for a day or two, as I happen
be a Utile short Just now. You know
where the I'ulmor Hoiiho Is, of course?"
"That all-flrod big stono tavern?"
"Yes. Meet mo there in one hour
from now to sign a contract and begin
work." i
"I'll be right thar, and I'll work ,llke
a boss, (lln me 111) out of this hill."
He handed out a bill, and the young
man scarcely glanced at it, so great was
his hurry to return the forty and get
away. I think bo mistrusted ui al
though we pretonded not to sea or hear
any When be was out of sight
"Huyteod" caiuo over to us with a grin
on his face, and queried: j
"How did I act It, boys?"
"What!" , .
"My young-man -from-llin-turnip-flelds."
"Hut you -you H
"1'ui from Cincinnati. I do a Utile
business with tho threo cards and the
shells when home. Thought I'd seo
what they were mado of In Chicago."
"Hut you gave biin a hundred dollar
bill."
"Exactly one of the counterfoils of
1874. I bad fifteen of them once. I'm
Just $40 ahead, I'm going now. If ho
should return before you leavo tell him
that 'Moven's has gono to meet him at
Mr. "V.nnr's big alone tavern. ' Two
b and red a month! Wake, snukes, but
hain't I jlst struck a goluonda w ith a
blgU!"-N. Y. Hun.
DEGRADED SAVAGES.
Thing Toltl lr I'r. Carl l.iimliults About
Uurrnilsiul Cimiillmls. i
Iteauty exists rarely 'iinngcunnihnls;
in fact, their features are distorted and
coutrac ted as It tho ligature of their
faces had been out when they were chil
dren like Umoc of the horrible Nero In
Hugo's "L'Homuie qui Kit"
It is on account of their unhealthy '
food that children are weaned late, and j
It even happen that a child Is nursed
at lis mother's breast with the next older
brother or sinter.
The advent of a baby Is not regarded
with favor and infanticide is therefore 1
very common. Horrible as it may sound
to civilised ears, mothers during a
scarcity of food will often eat their own
children.
They tattoo their children In tht
crudest way, cutting parallel lines
across the breast and stomach with
sharp stones and clam-shells, and keep
ing the wounds from healing by filling
them up with ashes or rhsrcoal. The
shoulders are cut In tho same manner
until they look like epaulets.
Cultivation of the soil Is unknown
among the aborigines; they subsist 00
wild honey, snakes, roots, lititrds and
edible beetles, with an occasional wild
animal. These beetles are broiled in
bot ashes until they are brown and Mr.
l.umholu says they taste better than a
European omelette when cracked open.
The position of women among these
aavages Is a very subordinate one.
They are expected to provide the dally
food and sally forth on long expeditions
for this purpose. If the husband gath
ers game or litards or such delicacies he
keeps the 111 fur himlf, while bi wife
and child must aubmit on vegetables
and berries.
They frequently flog their wives bru
tally, and If she runs away to some one
more kind, the husband Is privileged to
malm bor when he sees her. This la
wnat they call "marking" a woman.
Two wivea ia the usual matrimonial
equipment of a warrior, and some hsve
five or six. A girl Is delivered over to
her husband when she 1 nine or ten
years old, and aa long as they remain
young they are sura of good treatment
N. Y. Journal.
"Money talks." of course; hut a
couple of ulckcl In tbe contribution
box from philanthropist In the front
pew make mora noise than five-dollar
roles. N. 0. Ilcayjne.
It I not thoiwlit to make much differ- j
ence h t'ier a hoy' sk n is clean or not, i
jiiilin from the genernl cnr m in bet
ing l'.ut this ia rontrs-y in (u't.for it
hsa u aii!v Je'iionriMtrJ that sn au !
imal wnh a clean ikin dt Lot ronvitue
aa nm h one n kept clean and give j
better riura for the lood eaten. I
DCNRATBN RANCH
A Story of American Frontier
Life.
By OapU CHARLES CTN8, U. a A,
Author uThCotonr$ Oaughttr Trent
(As Runkt." "Tht Drltr,m SU.
And now those hounds who were out
on the right flunk are up In line with tbe
very leaders, and bounding along the
level at the side of the ravine, yet keep
lug wary eye upon the chase Ho. too.
the horsemen. Making a deep curve in
the ravine five hundred yards ahead, and
confident that Hunny will blindly rush
along his winding track, they strike out
across the prairie, gaining twenty horee
lengths hy the move, and now, with two
or three of the oldest hounds, I'arke,
Dnna and Mrs. Belknap are darting on
breast of the chase. "Keep out there
to Uie left, some of your ahouu Dana.
"He'll spring up the other side quick as
he sees us. Drive him back." And,
obedient to the signal of his waving
hand, two of the leading troopere breast
the slopes to the east, cnlling hulf dozen
hounds with them. Darting around a
bend, Bunny's agonized eyes catch sight
of the hound and horse on the right
hank, and like a flush he whirls, scamp
er up the opNMite slope, and shoots out
on the prairie aguin just In time to meet
the hounds and troomr who havi an
ticipated the move.
Now he I wild and demoralized.
Once more he dive Into tbe ravine and
end the dust flying Into the very faces
of his pursuers, for now the leading
hound are so close that the foremimt
jaw are anapping the air at his every
bound. A quick turn to the right and
up the eloe throws these leader far
too fur beyond; they sweep around In
long curve; but, though he ha thrown
them off. the hunted, senseless, helplcn
wretch has forgotten the trailers In the
rear; they spring across the angle he ha
made, and are close aa the original pur-
uers, and much the fresher. Wildly,
madly now he twist and turns, first up
one bank, then the other. Far to the
rear the coming riders see the signs of
hi breuking down, mark the scurrying
to and fro of horse and hound. "Come
on! tliey shout. "Lies gone now, anu
w can be In at tho dentlil" Mr. Law
rence on one side of the ravine ia as far
to the front as Mrs. Hoik nap on the
other. One of them must lose the brush;
he cannot die on both aides, at once.
The dark beauty ha had more thnn one
rasping disuptioiiitmeiit In the lust two
days; it would be intolerable now that,
after all, Mrs. Lawreuce, and not she.
should prove the victor.
Hunny makes one frantlo rush up the
slope to the right, and, with half a dozen
hounds at his very heels, spins In front
of her eyes, catches sight of two fresh
antagonist fronting him, whirl sud
denly ahout to the right, and almost
dive under her horse' heaving barrel as
he once more plunges into the ravine,
down the rugged alnpo, up the gentle
ascent to the other sldo. There half a
dozen long, lean muzzle gleam close be
hind hi in; he fuller, wavers; a sharp
nose 1 thrust underneath him aa he runs,
a quick tons sends him kicking, strug
gllng Into the air, and In another lnrtu.nl,
wllh piteous but liiulfectual xiueuk and
pleading, he la the center of a tumb
ling, anapping, fung gnashing group of
hounds, and his Utile life is torn out al
most liefore Grulium can leap from hli
saddle, heut thorn buck with the visor ol
his cup, then, seizing the still quivering
body by the legs that would have saved
could that empty head only have direct
ed, holds poor Hunny aloft in front of
Mrs. Lawrence a snorting steed aud pro
claims her "(Jueen of the Chase.
And this, too, has Mrs. Holknup to see
nd strive to smile, while down In her
heart she knows that it could not so Imvs
nappeuud hud I'erry come.
CnAITEIt XL
re noon, somew hat
comforted in oon
acience because of his
elf denial of the morn
ing, Ned I'erry scanned the distant prairie
in search of the hunk It was nesrly lun
cheon time, and he expected to llnd th
party making Ita way to the little stream
whither the Uutketa, boxes and hampers,
had been dixilched by wagon aom
hours liefore; but w hen he sighted th
quartermaster driving homeward In hli
buggy he learned from that bulky vet
eran that rabbit after rabbit had been
run, and that the whole party had dually
decided to give dog and horses a coo)
drink down In the Monee valley before,
aturting northward across Hie prairie.
"They must be getting down Into th
valley two or three miles east of the
ranch just about now, and will go due
north from there, unless they stir up
more guuie along the Monee. If I were
you," said the quartermaster, "I'd rids
over to the lunch stand. You won't gel
there much before the crowd,"
I'erry thanked him forth Information,
but, m far from accepting hi advice,
th young ofllcer turned his horse's hrsd
in the direction of iHinraven, and wa
speedily riding thither with an alacrity
that he himself could hardly explain.
in his brief talk with Hie colonel after
parade on the previous evening I'erry
had told Mm what he could of the char
acteristics of Messrs. Mallland and Ewen.
Hie odd letter which had been sent by
them had given the commanding officer
cause for much thought, and he was de
sirous, evidently, of gathering from
lerry'a observation a complete an Idea
as was possible of their fife and surround
inn. And still Perry bad found it Im
possible to volunteer any dwwription of
Vise Maitland; he could Dot bear to speak
if her until until he knew more of the
I oc tor's purpose in hia visits to the ranch.
He had been detained by hia commander
just long enough to mats it nscesMtry
Vr him so go direct to the SpntgutV
without leaving hia helmet and lr at
out. They were wailing dinner tor
lim aa it was, but air. Iklknap took do
AViittV?f'J& UMNO eastward Just
I.iai" bof.
Vte o7 that eircurnrfance; whul she aaw
s-as that he had avoided even pawling
within hull of her puuza both UrforeaoJ
ifier parade
Now. though conscious of no Intention
( avoidance, I'erry rxle lorlli W the
neeling of this day with some little mis
Wing. In llu (li st place, h- knew tliut
ie must sir! ve to make his rear with
Jils slialuud lady: and yet. in view of
til he hud seen and henrii l:i the pal
forty fight hours, how utterly dwarfes
lad that affair hi laughing flirtation
with Mrs. Ii4-lkriu Iss.-omel Had any
ne told him his utlciilions to her and
jer marked preference for his sis-lety
were mailers that cople were beginning
10 talk of some with sly enjoyment,
tliers with genuine regret he would
Save been grateful for the Information,
instead of resentful, us, with most men,
would be the case ninety-nine limes out
11 a humlred. Hut lie knew nothing of
;his, und had too Utile experience losus
pect the c.-immeiits in circulation, bhe
was uiost iiiien-sting up to the day be
fore yesterday; he loved to ride or dance
with her; he enjoyed a chut with her
more thnn he could tell. A most sym
pathetic and attentive listener wo Mrs.
Belknap, and her voice wus low and
in eel and full of vublly caressing tones.
Hm bail mado him talk to her by the
hour of his home, his hopes and ambi
tious, his pmfi-Hsion and his prosccta,
tnd had held him in 0 silken boudagt
that he had no desire to escape.
And yet, as ho rode, out on the breezy
plain this brilliant day, he found ull
thought of her distasteful, and his ryes,
fur from searching for the flutter of her
trim habit in the distant riding party,
would go roaming; over the intervening
ilmdcs and shallow down in tho Monee
valley and seek the bare, brown walls of
Dunraven far across the stream. It was
Mid indeed that he should have sought
this, the longest way round, on hi ride
in quest of hi companion from tho
fort
Unco agnln he looked at the isolated
clump of buildings from his post of ob
servation on the bluff; once again he
iw across the stream and through the
triK S the liarU-d liurri'jr that hud caused
both him and his mm .ch laceration of
flesh and temper; once uuin ho saw the
ibullow vulley winding uwuy to the
touthtast, decked with its scrubby
fringe work of Cottonwood and willow;
hut this time, three miles away, It ao
OUHtomed solitude was broken by groups
of riders and darting black spocks of
dogs, ull moving northward onco more
snd already brcju-ting the slopes. He
ihoiihl have tin tied away eastward and
ridden across country lo join iheiu, but
down here in the valley, only a short
distance away, ulmorlicd in watching
the hunting party, sat Mr. Ewen on a
pawlej; und excited bay. Whatever
oooluexs liis riilcr'iuight fuel at this dis
covery, it was not sluircd by Nolan; he
pricked up his ears and hailed his fel
low quadruped with cordial and unaf
fected pleasure, a neigh that the English
bred horse was so utterly uninsiilar us to
wiiirl nlsiul and nnswer with corro
iKiiuling warmth. Kwen caught nt his
heavy Derby and jerked It off his bullet
bend with an air of mingled embarrass
ment nnd civility, replacing it with
similarly spasmodic haste. Perry coolly,
hut with a certain easy grace, raised his
forage cup in resKiiise In the salutation,
and then, seeing the manager xlis I. Hik
ing nl him ns though tie wanted to say
something und did not know bow to I lo
gin, gnve Nolan his head mid rode, dow n
to short hailing distance.
"W'o meet 011 neutral ground out hero.
Mr. 10 wen 1 siipHwu your exclusive
employer over yonder can hardly pro
hibit your answering civil inquiries after
his health?" And, though he meant to
be distant, Perry found Idinself smiling
at the oddity of the situation,
"Do you know, I was just thinking
alxuit you," answered Kwen, "nnd won
dering whether you w ere with that party
dowu yonder? Tim old gentleman is
better, thanks. He had two pretty bud
nights, but is coining around slowly."
"And Miss Mitillumi-how is she'f"
"Hither seedy. She bus hud good
deal of cure and vexation of late, I fancy,
id this ia no place for young girl,
afivhow."
"Well, you have some appreciation of
the true character of Dunraven us a resi
dunce, after ulir'answerry Perry. "Now,
if you can give 1110 uuy gixfcl reason why
she should live in this uttorly out-of-the-way
place, you will lift weight from
my mind."
"Oh, they don't live hero, you know,"
poke Eweu, hurriedly. "She come
hero only when her father docs. It I
her own doin. She goes with him
everywhere, anl will not leave hint.
She's ull ho has, don't you know?"
"1 don't know anything about It
You Dunraven people soeui averse to
any expression of Interest or courtesy
from your fellowmen, but I'm freo to
say I should like to know what on earth
there Is in American cavalrymen to
make them such ohjis-ts of aversion to
your muster; and I would be glad to
know how it is such a girl as thut i
drugged into such a hole as yonder."
Ewen s;it in silence a moment, study
ing the young fellow's fuce.
"You deserve a belter welcome there,"
he presently answered, "and I don't
know thut 1 can do better than lo tell
you ih milh what 1 know of it. And
let uie tell you that if the old mau knew
nf my sS'uking of it to any one, I'd lose
the most lucrulive but least attractive
place I ever had. Do you sec?"
"Then perhaps you had better not tell
me. I do not care to pry into secrets."
"Oh, this is n secret. Il wus thut Hint
drove him here; everybody knew it in
England. You were mighty shabbily
treated at the ranch, and you requited it
by preventing what would have been
bloody row, and by lending us a helping
bund. Even the old mun recognize
that; and I thiuk he'd be glad lo say so
to you, and see you, if you were not Just
what you are a cavalry officer."
"Why. what on earth can we have
done? If any of our cloth have wronged
Mr. Maiil.md In any way, it is our right
to know il and take it up."
"it wasn't your chilli, old fellow."
said Ewen. th.-twiug visibly, "but it wus
the cavalry all tbe Mine that broke hi
heart and his pride, and made his life
the wrwk it K and drove him from his
borne, shunning the si.-lit of his fellow
men, all these vears xiling her. t. In
the prime of her young life Mr IViry,
there ar only three or four of us at
Dunraven who know the st iry. but
have only sympathy and pity nold.une
for him. though he is the hardest
vaster I ever served."
"How did it happen?" "led Perry.
"All through his son. There had been
nor of them, but there was only th
one Archie when the Lancers were
ordered to South Africa, il waa a
rounder, only 17, they tell me, and be
naJ fust Wen gazetted to lib) Cornetcy.
The old man wus all wrapped up in bim,
for of the three boy the eldest had died
only the month liefore the regiment wai
ordered oh foreign service and the ec
und had been killed In India. Both
ilieae two who were gone had mad
tJiemselve fomou mong their com
ude by their fearlessness and high
character, and the old man, of course,
could not ask Archie to quit the aervlw
just when order for dungerou duty
came. The boy went to the Cape with
hicorprf nnd got into the thick of tht
Zulu war just at the time of the massa
cre of tbe Twenty-fourth nt Isandlwhani
and the fight at Itorke Drift I wai
at home then, and all England wai
quivering with grief over uch needles!
sacrifice a wa made of that regiment,
and ull ready to full down and worshlr
such fellow a Chard and Ilromhead
who made th nipcrb light almost at till
same time.
"Theysuy old Malifnd wanted to gc
himself, as volunteer or something, with
Lord Chelmsford, but It couldn't hi
lone. His father had fought at Ainu
nd Inkerman. and his grandfather hud
d the (iuards at Wutcrloo. The whoh
rilie were soldiers, you know; and now
A rchie waa with the Lancers in Zululund,
and the Lancers were going to wipe out
the disaster of the first fight of th
campaign, and Archie wo to uphold tin
grand old lighting name and come hoim
covered with glory. He was the heil
now, and Mis (Jladyt was but a littli
girl, i have Inurd it all from Mrs
Cowan; she was their housekeeper it
those duvs. and a sort of companion, too
to Mrs. Maitland, who was very delicate.
The old man was very fiery and proud
and full of licrce denunciation of every
thing that had gone wrong in the cam
paign;and be offended some people bj
the way he condemned some officer whe
was a friend of theirs, and there wen
others who thought be talked too much;
but he fairly boiled over when the newi
cume of how the prince imperial hud
been abandoned by his escort, and that
British ofllcer and a dozen uien had rut
two miles ut top eod from a lieggarlj
little squad of niggers before they dared
look round to see what had become ol
their prince, whom they hud left to flghl
the gang alone. Thut was old Maitland'i
text for u month. If any son of his bud
ever lieen of that party he would disown
disgrace, deny him. forbid him his sight
cut him off forever. And right in tin
midst of it ull a judgment, some peoph
laid there came the awful news tlia'
Jornet Maitland of the Lancers was to Is
urt niartialed for misbehavior in fac
jf the enemy.
"Of course the old man only raged nl
first, said it couldn't be true; 'twas al
mcfotil invention or ridiculous blun
Jur, but he ran up to London and saw
somclxHly nt llie Horse Guurds thal'i
vnir war olilce. you know and cuun
o.ick iHking a century older and simpli
vriished to earth. Mrs. Cowan says they
jhowed him the ofliciul rejiort of a gen
Will ollh'cr who wus called upon tocx
plain why he had not sent certain troop
1 the ri'lief of un advanced and threat
ned kisI, and ho replied that he hat
tent the order by Cornet Maitland. of tin
pincers, bad given him an escort of 1
dozen men und strict injunctions to pusl
through by night, at ull hazards, thougl
the way was beset with Zulus, and Ilia
be neither went through nor returned
hut was found hiding nl a kraal twodayi
ifter, only twenty miles uwuy. Tin
j-mirt returned, and after much cross
sxaminutioii had told the story, separate
rand collectively, thut the young office'
dad IsH-ome utterly unnerved toward,
liiilnight by the reK)rts from scoutiiu
parties and others; hud declared to then
tint it was simply madness to alteins
j push through; they would be massu
.ird to a man; and, though they an
tumiiced that they were stanch and ready
lie refused, nnd ordered them to bivouni
where they were for the night, uud ii
the morning he bad disapeured. The
declared they supKised he had gone bucl
to camp, and after waiting a day the
returned, rcorting him lost.
"Wheu found ut the kranl he was do
llrious with fever, or pretended to be
said the general, and he was brought it
under arrest and the trial was to pro
cccd. I don't know how it turned out
He was not court niartialed, hut jierniit
led to return to England. It was said lit
'Id a very different dory; that he hat
lagged the brigade major who detuilec
the escort to let him have hulf a dtizel
of his own Lancers instead of the pad
of irregulars they gave him: he did no:
trust them, uud feared they would ubun
don him ns they had the prince; but tin
stuff olliccr said the order couldn't Is
changed these men knew the country
and nil that sort of thing, you know; and
there was one fellow in the Lancers win.
stuck to it thut he believed Maitland nun
tried bis I nut to get through alone. Ilui
'twas all useless; somebody had to U
held resionsililu, and the failure was ul
hcaHsl on him.
"Meantime, there had been fury at
home; old Maitland had written casting
him off. repudiating cursing him foi
all I know and the next thing then
came a messenger from the captain ol
his ship ul Southampton. They brougln
his watch, his ring, bis sword and port
uianU.tiis. and a letter which U writ
en on receipt of that his father sent
am a long letter, that the old man
it-ver read to any living soul, but broods
iver to this day The young fellow lade
hem all good-br; he would not live to
lisgrace them further, if that was what
vas thought of him at home, and leaped
iverboard from the sterner the night
ifter she w eighed anchor no oneabourd
xhiM tell just when, but be was writing
11 his state room as she cleared the bar
xir, and the steward saw him undress
ng at 0 o'clock In the morning every
hing about bis belongings wus found in
perfect order his letter lo the captain
)f the ship, the portmanteaus, watch,
ring, clothing, etc., just as he dcM-rilied
in that letter and he was no more seen.
Il was the conviction of all thut he must
have hupcd ov, rlswrj in the darkness
when far out at st-a.
"Then Mrs. Maitland bowed her head
tnd never lifted it again. Then, all
loin, nnd fiercely rejecting anything
tike sympathy, old Maitland took to
travel came here lo America, wandered
tround the world, shunning men as he
would th. prairie wolves, and wheu
lie Ii d in pi in England he would see no
ste luit tin-attorneys and solicitor w iih
w in -in Ih- bad business. Here al Dun
rairn Ih is more content than anywhere.
htsMtiso he is farther Iroui the wwld
Here Cl.tdy hi queen 'twas she who
named it. two year ago. for her mother
wus a connevtion "f the earl' Hut
11 tit'..nd even here hale to have his
name mentioned, and that is why I uy
he li fers all buMnrsa lo me and keep
hi:iiM lf out of everything. Do you sm
lut a.weighl be carries?"
T cotrroti-ioj.
THE ARIZONA. KICKER.
obis of lbs nrro nd Joys of Wester)
Killtorisl Ufa.
We extract the following from tht
last issue of the Arizona Kicker, which
was only a half sheet, and which seemed
to have been printed on a cheese-presa.
Exi'LAXATobv. We owe our reader
an apology for tho hape and appear
ance of the Kicker this week, and shall
proceed to give it. Last Sunday we went
t.n Kilter Ilend to ee tbe boys and
i rake in a few subscriptions. Our office
I was left in charge of a chap just from
' the East who claimed to be tieorge Al
j fred Townsend. As we bad never met
George we did not fool like calling the
stranger a liar.
We intended to return Tuesday morn
' lng, but in this country man propose
' and mules and other things buck against
hlra. Tho Infernal, lop-eared, stiff
! legged, pig-headed, limb-spavined beast
I which we rodo-a fit counterpart of our
1 contemporary down tho street threw
I us nine times in going thirteen miles,
and we arrived at the liend badly used
I up. We hadn't yet raked In a dollar
j when Lew Smith, pug-ugly whom we
, assisted to run out of our town four
weeks ago, sounded his war-cry ana be
gan to encourage the liendors to hang
us. Most of 'em were on a drunk that
day, and tbe proposition at once found
favor.
Under the protonse that we, as editor,
publisher, proprietor and city editor of
the greatest weekly In tbe West and
which runs as an annex, but undor tbe
same roof, a grocery, butcher shop, feed
store, shoe store, hardware and cutlery,
had been seeking to break down th
social barrlors of tbe mighty West, thoy
hunted up a rope and selected a troe.
We appealed, but It only added to their
desire. We tried to arguo, but they
wouldn't have it Our editorial person
was laid hold of and hustled alung to a
rope dangling from a limb, and as we
looked over the crowd and failed to
catch a sympathetic eye we felt that our
time, bad como.
The boys were white about one thing.
Drunk as they were, thoy had sense
enough to realize that a groat editor
could not wind up hi earthly affairs in
a satisfactory mannor under fifteen min
utes, and on motion of a half-breod, who
once succeeded In borrowing half a dol
lar of us, the time was increased to
twenty. We wanted to argue the caso,
but it was no go. We started In on a
speech, but they whooped us down. By
the time that we got down to buslnes
five of our twenty minutes had Bed.
During our editorial caroer we have
assisted at several amateur executions.
We had always supposed that if the
crowd was sutisllod tho victim was bound
to bo. It nover seomed much of an ef
fort for him to lot goof earthly matters,
and we have sometimes wondered wby
more of them didn't come forward and
ask to be pulled up to a limb. Our Ideas
underwent a great change as we sat on
a meat-box under a dangling rope, while
the minutes hurried away like a jackass
rabbit taking tho lead of a prairie fire
on a windy day. Any man who bollovos
he can do business undor such circum
stances U mistaken. Ho fnols restless
and unsettled, and his mind seems to be
distributed ovor acres of space.
It was only after wo had lost twelve
minutes of our time fooling around that
we started '.n on our last will and testa
ment, and we hadn't wrliton threo lines
of that before we suddonly rocolloctod
that WM wcro without a blood relative
on earth. As to leaving the Klckor and
its annex to any galoot in town was not
to bo thought of, and wo finally mado
out a bill of sale to that Individual
known as William of the Hill, who has
several times appeared in our town and
attempted to run the city government
with a broncho and two revolvers. We
didn't expect him to maintain its high
literory stundard and great moral excel
lencn, but wo know ho d kill tho post
master and make a sieve of our contem
porary tho first week of his editorial
career.
When time was up the noose was
placed over our heal and tightened un
der our chin, and It admonished us to
observe the apparent enjoyment of the
crowd. They scorned to feel in as good
spirits as an army horso turned out to
buffalo gaass, and their Impatience to
make, a pendulum of our body was an
other queer feature of tho convention.
We had just been drawn off our feet,
and our editorial Ideas were becoming
rapidly mixed, when a lot of passing
cow-drivers happened along and broke
up the candy pull on the ground that
they were waiting to hang us the first
time wo came up there. We were saved
to bo hung at I'hujnlx if we ever show
up thero.
We are just able to crawl around. We
have chills, sore throat, pains in the
back, headacho and a general foellng
that wo don't care a copper which party
elects the next President We apologize
for the appcaranuo of things this week,
and promise not to be lynched sg iin it
In our power to avoid it Detroit Free
Pros.
PRESENCE OF MIND.
It tVas Shown bj a flnld-lltvr Vnittt
Trjtliif Ctrrumatsncmi.
I have heard of many striking exhibi
tions of presence of mind in the face of
udden danger, but here is an instance
of it which beats every thing of the kind
that has ever come under my notice. I
can vouch for tho truth of the story.
An Australian "forty-niner," who had
truck It fairly rich at tho gold diggings,
was taking his nuggets and dust to Mel
bourne. He was walking alosg by the
side, of his team with bis rifle under his
arm, indulging in pleasant speculations
concerning the good time he would have
after he bad sold his gold, when
stranger appeared on the road, and ac
costing him, said:
"liive us a piece of 'baccy, mato."
Those were daysnheo people, espe
cially those who had been to the dig
gings, didn't stand on ceremony. Sus
pecting no Ueachery. the miner thrusta
hand into his pocket to get chunk of
tbe much-prized weed.
Ia a moment the muzzle of a pistol
was thrust against his forehead, and the
stranger shouted:
"lUil up'."
The stranger was a bush ranger, and
that was the way bush rangers ordered
their victim's to throw up their hands
before going through them.
Without pausing an instant although
he knew that the bush ranger had only
to exorcise a little gentle pressure with
his forflngvr to blow him into eternity,
the miner bawled out at the top of his
voice: .
"llobr
T;ere was no "Bob" around there. It
conceived by the miner ia
the fraction of second and immediate
ly put into execution to distract the at-U-oUon
of the bush ranker. It worked.
The bush ranger thought th miner was
calling a companion to hi assistance,
lie looked around to catchy film pea of
the fictitious "Hob." Thai wa the
njiner'sopportunlty. Quick a flash
he swung his lefturm and knocked tbe
pistol out of tbe bush ranger' grasp.
Then be brought bi rifle to bis aboulder
aud leveled it at the bush ranger'
bead. In much less time than it tukes
to tell It tho situation had been com
pletely reversed. The bush ranger was
at the mercy of the miner.
"Now," suld ho, "you scoundrel, just
fold your hands behind your back and
march ahead of me; if you move or try
to runaway I'll save tho hangman a job
by letting daylight through you."
In that way tho miner escorted tho
hush ranger Into town and banded blm
ever to tbe police. Toledo Illado.
THE LOVE OF HUMBUG.
How th llumsn Ksmilr I llrgulled by
Nlistns mikI rrecenilers.
If one may bo Indulged in the use of
a little slun', It makes a wise man tired
to see bow persistently his compeers run
after and are beguiled by the latest
shams, and seom nover so hnppy as when
they are being deceived. Especlully Is
this trait noticeable In tbe matter ol
physical ailments. Tho family physi
cian may measure out his prescrllcd
doses of qulnino or senna, give tbe
patient a pluin, practical talk, and de
part with theconseiousncsiof duty done
and the certainty thut tho subject will
leave the powders untouched on the
mantel, unless be l.:omes frightened,
and that his reputation as a physican
will suffer in consequence. Hut let
some traveling fakir como along, pitch
his tent swing out his flag, with ringing
of bells and blowing of horns, and lo!
the public is at his feet ready to lie
healed, willing to swallow tho most
nauseous mixtures, If only they be
christened with unpronounceable and
untranslatable names, anxious to pay
doiiblo the fees of a respectable, respon
sible physician, and bold to assert after
a wuek's diet of bread pills and rain wa
ter sweelened with molasses, that they
are perfectly cured of imagined ail
ments, and are urgent that their friends
shall share in their good fortune.
(science doesn't always receive the
support of tho universal puollc; hum
buggery does. Tho street wizard, with
tangled hair and picturesque garb, can
extract teeth painlessly by tho same
process which nearly murders tho
patient if performed by an educated
dentist, dressed in nineteenth century
clothes and located in a well-appointed
olllco. Tho nohlo aborigine, in war
paint und feathers, dealing out mystic
oils, will carry off all tho spare change
of a community, whilo the vlllago phy
sician grows poverty-stricken. The
dealers in patent medicines roll In
wealth; tho vailed sibyl who prescrllie
to her mystified devotees from a dark
ened 1 losct gathers In the shekels; and
If tho commonplace physician means to
hold his own ho will soon bo competed
to label Lis vials with cabalistic char
acters, consecrate, them with mystic
pa-soi and mutter "abracadabra" over
tliem as ho gives them into the patient's
band. The common sen.-e which a man
uses in tho selection of a suitable coat
or but seems to des -rt hiin utterly when
uny trifling ailment attacks him. His
Intellect wavers, and superstition, that
cunning fiend always lying In wait for
humanity, betrays bim unresisting into
the toils of tho mountebank. Wo can
not chango human nature with our ex
ordiums, but wo can ut least make it
alive to its own weaknesses and incon
sistencies. Milwaukee Sentinel.
CHROMO MANUFACTURE.
Uow lleitlly ArtUlln Copies of rulntliiKf
Am rrotlui'iMl.
All chromos are not works of art by
any means, some being most ntr.wious
daubs, but a really g.iod chromo Is hut
little inferior in artistic valuo to the
painting of which It is a copy. To
p-oporly produco a chromo, a litho
grapher matt be himself an artist; he
must analyze tho picture and fully real
ize tho combinations of colors and tho
Bp.rltof the work.
Tho lithographer begins by preparing
a stone for each ' separate, color, and
thoro may be as many as twenty. Then
he makes a delicate and elaborate ink
tracing of tho picture; not only its gen
eral outlines, but tho minute and intri
cate touches and shadesof color of which
it Is composed,
Tbe tracing paper is chemically pre
pared, so that the lines upon It can be
reudily transferred to stono. A press is
employed to transfer the impressions on
tho paper to thn stone, considerable
pressure being used. Thousands of im
pressions can then ho taken from the
stone by simply running an ink-roller
over It
The tracing thus transferred forms
what is known as tho "key stono." Sup
pose there are twenty colo.si in the
chromo. This number of Impressions is
taken from tho key stone and each care
fully dusted with red chalk. A dim
copy of theentiretracingisthen pressed
on each one of these atones.
Tho drawing then begins, and often
occupies many months. Each stone is
to be printed )n a separato color, and
therefore must contain not only all that
Is necessary of that color of the picture,
to tho minutest dcUil. but all of the
compound colors, mado by printing one
or more over others.
A variety of gradations of color from
its full strergth to tho faintest tinting
can bo produced on each stone, just as
In using an ordinary pencil or crayon on
drawing-paper. Tho various colors are,
of course, worked up in bla-k hy the
artist, and it Is the printer who applies
tho colors. Tho lines on each separate
stone are etched with the wash of nitric
add an 1 gum arabic, and are ready for
the presses.
Tho printer must be as skillful as the
artist in applying his colors, au I must
fully realize the blending and effect of
each color. As fast as each color Is
printed it is suhmitfd to the artist
who has thus a progressive proof of the
work.
It has been probably noticed that
lines cross each other on the margin of
a chromo. These ar, tne registering
marks, an! enable tho printer to place
the sheet In the sm relative position
every time a new stone Is used and a
new color applied.
These lines are drawn in the original
tracing and app ar on each stone. When
the first color is printed very small
holes are punctured in each sheet at the
intersection of these line, very fine
holes are also drilled in corresponding
positions on eich of the ub-quont
tones, anl tbe holes in the paper ara
to correspond precisely with the holes
ia the stone, and thus as each additions!
color is put on. a perfect register is
cured and each color falls just where It
belongs. i
The next process Is to make the
chromo have a rough surface like an oil
painting. A atone is now prepared
which has rough surface, similar to
cafivass. The chromo is raon W.Z upon
It snd passod through s press with
besvy pressure. Whon it comes forth,
it is an exact imitation of the painting.
It is then varnished, and thus you DT0
tbe chromo ready for the market.
An expensive part of ohromo-maklng
Is the lithographic stone, A bid of
lithographic stone has been found In
j Tennessee, and there are small quarrloi
In France, England and Canala, but It
I Is all of a coarse quality.
There is only ono reauy nne quarry,
and that Is In liavarla, and tho stone ui
worth thirteen cents a pound.-Ooldea
Day.
MISCELLANEOUS.
Twenty-one tramps met In. Decatar
Neb., and ordered meals at a restaurant
After they had eaten they compelled
the proprietor to accept ten cents as pay.
ment in full.
A Frankfort Ky.,man Is training hi
hens to lay their eggs in the kitchen,
where ho has placed a cradlo for their
accommodation. This saves the labor ol
hunting the eggs.
A burglar at Cincinnati, who re
mained curled up undor s bed for hours
waiting an opportunity to rob th house,
was obliged to sneeze, when ho was dis
covered, pulled out and banded over to
the police.
It has beon assorted that chewing
wooden toothpicks sometimes produces
small ulcers In tho mouth, and that even
the stomach has been similarly affected
by the action of the small particles of
wood detached by chewing.
A New Yorker was about to drown
In tho surf at lleach Haven last sum
mer, when bo cried out that he would
give S-'i.OOU to tho man that saved him.
Ho was saved, but bo wouldn't pay, and
the other day settled the matter for $15,
alleging he mount to cry out that figure
and no higher ono.
A French paper proposes, in time of
war, to make carrier pigoons photograph
tracts of country by attaching to them
miniature cameras, In which tho thin
spool of sensitized papor shall unwind
and bo exposed as they fly over the
country. The pictures can afterwards
be enlarged.
A few days ago as a class at the
Cincinnati Collegoof Mo licino was about
to dissect the body of a man who had
died of drink, a young man rushed into
tho room and threw himself on the sub
ject crying: "My father! O, my poor
father!" This recalls tho fact that some
years a?o President Harrison found In
the Ohio Modlcal College tho body of
his father, John Scott Harrison, of North
Itend, Ind. These horrible incidents
emphasize tho fact that there is a vast
deal of unpleasant rouunce in actual
life.
A searcher among old deeds and rec
ords In London lately came across a
statement that Mr. Samuol Wilson be
queathed a sum of 'J0, 001) which was
considerably increased "to bo lent to
men who have been Set up ono year, and
not more than two years, in somi trade
or manufacture In tho city of London,
or within three miles thereof, and who
can give satisfactory security for tho re
payment of same." It has not boon
claimed for many years.
In Switzerland and other mountain
ous countries tbe goat leads long strings
of animals daily to and from the moun
tains, hut it is in South Africa that it U
regularly kept and binployed as a leader
of flocks of sheep. Should a blinding
storm of rain or hail drive tho silly
slit-op bofore it, or causo them to huddle
together in a corner so as to suffocate
each other, the trainod goat will wake
thorn up, an. I. by methods best known
to himself, will Indues them to follow
him to u place of safety.
Some idea of tho care necessary to
preserve the great oil pipo linos intact
is furnishod by ono of our contomparar
ies. It appears that track-wulkors pass
over every mile of the line each day,
about fiftoen miles lining assigned to
eoch man. Every walker is a telegraph
operator and Is supplied with a pocket
instrument. Should he discover a leak
in the lino he Immodiaioly telegraphs
the division superintendent At stated
Intervals along tho telegraph lines wires
run down tho poles into locked boxe9,
the key of which is carried by the
walkor. Oponing the box, he attaches
his instrument and wires report to
headquarters.
AN HISTORIC INCIDENT.
William IV. Vets Stuck While Heading a
Rperrh from the Throne.
King William IV. had a rather em
barrassing time in reading his speech st
the opening of Parlir.mont February 4,
18M. The day was a dark one, and his
eyesight was so poor that he had diffi
culty In reading his own production.
He made a desperate effort to get
through with his task, frequently cor
recting himself, hesitating, stammering
and blundering. Whon he finally got
stuck completely, and appealed to Lord
Melliourne to deoipher the word he
could not mako out the situation was
almost painful. Ho was persistent
however, and continued to toil on until
he got ahout to tbe middle of the ad
dress when the librarian brought is
two wax candles. He then paused, and
looking at theLordsand Commons male
this littlo apology: "I have not been
able, from want of light to read this
speech In the way its importance de
servos, but as lights are now brought
me, I will read it again from the com
mencement, and in a way which I trust
will command your attention." These
words, tho historian takes pains to sdd,
werespoken distinctly and without em
barrassment. The King, though fatigued
by the struggle in the darkness with bis
manuscript then began again at the
beginningand read the speech through
to the end in a stylo worthy of a teacher
of elocution. This trifling incident h
been thought worthy of record by British
historians because it came near disturb
ing the gravity and dignity of what I4
usually a very solemn and impressive
occasion. Chicago News.
Mlntrln of Artistie Beautr
The new brocades continue to he
miracles of artistic beauty anl endl?1
variety. A length of pearl-colored bro
cade in a shower of lilies of the valley,
a delicate cream ground hidden in
tangle of tiny roses, a mass of soft
yellow silk scattered over with wheat
ears all await the moment of inpir
tion in some master mind to be com
bined in wonderful creatiens for lb
enl.ancin? of same rareb".ty'i;'!i',T""
Even staid woolen materials havecaa?',
the craze, and blossom with anemone
and Japanese chrysanthemums of black
on terra cotta or gray surfaces. Suit
ble complements of these gorgeous ft'
rlcs sre the girdles of pearl sometim
thrown among their folds in the shop.
pe'vrl Medici collars, garnitures of P-"
pink poppi. s and roes, with velvet
petals and ceiatures of black pissame"
terie with long fringed ends of let" '