EUGENE CITY GUARD. I. k AMFHKI.I.. Proprietor. EUGENE CITY. OREGON. THE WHELPING ICE. anllng Oh lh Tri-ilirou tlUl tf Vt-w(.undliHl. ThoiiMimdH of seal are found io patches on the floes, but when one patch Ib exterminated tho men often have to wunder fur from the ship In seurch of more fUfi and It 1 then that their early trslnlng In copying corned in advantageously. Occasion ally the nealer go eighteen or twenty mi!.- away from the veol over the Ice, and in all placet It may not he equally tronj. Somotlmo the pmiH aro scattered; then the oxerieiieed copylMt will use a slab of Ice an a raft, guiding it Into the denlrcd position with hid guff, and so ferrying himself across tho "leads" or open wuter. At other timed the 'lolly'' or "sludge" Id oft, hut will bear just one foot ut a time, ho tho hunters spring rapid ly over till they llnd a more secure pun on which to take hrcuth. When they have gone far and huvo to drag their "towi" of skin a considerable distance buck to the ship, it muy happen thul where the Ice hud been nil secure on the journey out the scalers llnd a gap too wide to jump ly ing right In their homeward path. Hot even if no floating pans are within reach, they aro at no loss what to do; the "tows," each containing llvo or six sealskins with the blubber attachcil, urc Hung Into the water; the blubber causes them to (lout and the men use them as stepping-stones across the open water. Accidents, of course, oc cur from time to time, and men often go through tho "lolly" or miss their foot ing and come in for a cold bath, which, considering their lllthy condition, may not he altogether an unmitigated evil; but it is rarely that any of them are drowned, at help Is always at liund. Occasionally the whelping Ico approaches so close to the shore that the landsmen come in for their share of the spull, and then even the women and children eagerly join the scene uf carnage. In the spring of 1 MM.'I. at it place culled Kelt's cove, one woman secured tlvc-and-thlrty seals in one day, and at Twilllngulo many women killed heaVy loads of scats, the people going twelve miles from In ml on the Ice to reap this harvest. When the ice remains lightly packed for any length of time in tho hays tho seals out' times crawl on to tho land, and at Bonavlstu Hay It has happened that us many iih 1,'iOU seals have been killed among the bushes on one of tho islands. A few years ago thu seal Ice came close to the town of St. John's, and the inhabitants sallied nut to reap the bcticllt. As they went seaward In the morning some of the hunters saw a man with his gun beside him silling on a hammock of Ico not far from thu mouth of the harbor. At his feci lay a dead seal. They went on In quest of their pray, and walked so far out that it was late in (lie afternoon before they returned. Happening to uiss by the same spot they saw the man still sll tlng on the Mine hummock and the seal lying as before. They went up to him. Tim man was dead, Hitting upright Htark and star'ng, frozen hard as the Ice on which ho rested. Nineteenth Century. HIT BY A COINCIDENCE. A Mdii with Wiiutlmi I t Mi'i-la Ills lieu, I of Si nipitl lifttli r'ftiully. Thu owner of a place on Second avenue stood in his barn door on thu alloy the other day w hen a man with a wooileu leg and a crutch came along nnd passed the 11111011' day anil liuallv Midi "Say, I want you to do nut a favor. I want to leave my log with you for a few minutes." "WhyP" "I want to go around on Second live nue nnd work a house for half a dollar In money, i'vu got a pointer that the folks nrti very y ntpathctic. II I go with one leg I'm suro of it" "Very well; just leave your leg hero and I II lake cure of It" The wooden substitute was un Htrupped nnd handod over, and the cripple used tho crutch to help himself down tho alley. Five minutes later ho rang the door-bell of a house around tho avenue, to have It opened by tho man he had seen at tho bam. "YV -wha-what!'' he gasped in as tonishment. "Very sympathetic family live here!" quietly replied the other. "You seem to have met with a sail loss, and I'm anxious to help you. Hero is a wooden leg bu b iiih) lit you. ' The leg was handed over, lite man tat down on the steps and strapiwd It on, nnd as he got up ami stumped through the gate, he said Ui himself: "I've heard of coincidences over since I was knee-high to a ho-toad, but this is the first one that ever hit me with both foet at once!" Detroit Tree 1'ress. -The Haptisl (Y. (M, State Mis Umary reports that of Nlti llaplist churches In the State 741 are in the country and in village; M7 are una ble, without aid. to sustain pastors; over two hundred of them arc pastor leei from year to year, and although the membership of thu chun-lies in the Slat-has in the last fifteen venr Increased 1H.7.M, the membership in the country and smaller vitiligos has fallen off fully 5,000. There l a story told of Mr V. II. Ilowells to the effect that on one oc casion ho attended a costume party wearing the conventional evening 00 tumeof the present, here every guest ws requiris! to appear in the dross of cne of the chai actor, lu the novel of Scott tin being brought to book for thl Irregularity, be justified his garb by thu plea that he did represent one of the chluf character In Scott, Um otten-uppaarlnj "gaoil, reader." An euilor In reply to a young writer who wished to know which inagaxloe would give him the hlghect position quickest, advised "a powder magaalne, especially if you cuolrlbut a nary article-" A SEDUCTIVE DRINK, Tils Niatliitial 11 ' Ssmm Mm It la I eurii, t, ,1 Hospitality Ih a part of the Samonr. religion, politeness one of their chlei characteristic, and a dishonest net tic exception Food and shelter aro vouch safed to every mill entering their home' or villages, and the stranger bus but to consult his own wishes when he li ready to depart Attached to every village in a fulttint, Of guest-house, act apart for the reception, lodging and enleiliiinment or visitors, (ieiicriilly this is situated In thn middle of the vllliure. and Is also used as a council- house on occasions when the chief and llio people nsdomme lOQ.scusdsuojecii. of Importune-. Foreigners an 1 vis- itorsfn.m other villages aro at or OOndllotod to this house, del apart for thnirocctipatlon, a journey of consider hie distance often being made es pecially to meet them, when they are received by the chief of the town and the maid whose duty it id to look after the welfare of the guests. During the preliminary conversation, in whiobUM compliments of the day are ox.hungei.1 with 11 lavish expenditure of persona! Ilatlory, the kava-bnwl is produced, and while the free interohaiii:o of coin plimeiilH continued, tho bewitching nut-hi-owii maid, with the assistance of her flunky attendants, begin too masticate the deductive rout. In UM monntlmo the villagers, being advised of the arrival of thu visitors, have as sembled in another part of the village, oollm-led articli-H of food, 11.nl b'-gtlii to ing and march In procession towards the Ftlr-tutr. Hoys and girls, young and old, making a festive dldplay, llu-ir persona anointed with coconnut oil and arrayed in scanty toilets of leaves and Mowers, join in demonstration of songs ol praise and welcome. The music ol their well-attuned voices, first heard faintly in the distance mid Increasing In HWcctucHH and volume as they ap proach nearer and nearer, produces a charming effect, the linprcsdiou ol which Is long retained by stranger. In tho meantime the guests, who have remained seated ami silent, if uncon scious of what Is going 011, prose 1 fC I wonderful solemnity of countenance as each donor In turn modestly placed hi offering at tho feet of the most honored one, with salutations inimit able in gracefulness. (In hii.-Ii i a- alnim food, consisting of fruits. Unit, and sucking-pigs, is sometimes given In sufficient quantities to diistiiiu a visiting party for days anil weeks. No occasion of ceremony or impor tance lakes place without the us, of knva, a root of the pepper family, and all exchanges of sociability are con' ducted under its ii.lluonco. The con coction of the seductive beverage made from this root is attended with MOM) ceremonious observations and nooin illations of approval that an account of the customs of these people would be incomplete without reference to the manner In which the drink is prepiired. A wooden bowl, a coconnut cup, and a strainer are the implements used In making the brew. That personage ol the chief social Importance in Samoa, "the maiil of the village," is invariably called upon to brew the beverage, which ceremony, with her utton. hints, ho conducts w ith becoming dignity. After carefully washing out hor mouth in the presence of nil assembled, dim scuts herself up on the matted Moor with the howl lu front of her, and with resigned milliner and preoccupied countenance U'glns to masticate the bits of root handed her by the altendiintaV Piece after piece Is chewed until tho mouth I full and the cheeks bulging, when tho mass Is ejected into the palm of her hand and, w ith a graceful swing, deposited in the howl. This operation U repeated until tho proper quantity of tho root is secured. Then her hands aro washed scrupulously cleitn, nnd ait attenilaut having poured the required amount of water into the howl, tho maid proceeds with the compounding. With u graceful rolling and twisting inurnment of the bauds she mixes all tho undissolved portions of the root In tho "foil," or strainer, which, nfier wringing, is shaken out, and the strain ing repealed until thu brew is finished. Century. LOVE OF NATURE. Tii PtaMr uf Havlai Kaowa m Galley hiiuil llreiika, llllla Mild lee There urc tunny pieces of sheer good fortune for children of luck In this world: it Is well to hnvoltcoii Intra rich or handsome. Of to have the talcnti which command tho prizes of life. Hut It is perhaps no less happy am) supreme a gift to have been horn a child of the universe; lo have known lu early childhood brooks, mountains and sea: lo have felt the companion ship of the sky, and in listening to iti thunder to have heard deep calling unto deep. There Is often an incom municable and half-unconscious sense of these thing in tho heart of child, wholly apart from any training or habit of observation It jj a seed which any soil vv ill quicken; the commonest landscape will be food for It a- tine as the Alps In fact, there it sometimes with the child a with thu artist n -ort of instinctive selection of the humbler phase. Among the incut orles of a journey through Switzerland lu my childhood, that of a woodland bunk at Kosenliiui. covered with most and with liny pink Bowers, remains to me as havlig nfforded at least a- keen a pleasure it tho glacier itself, nnd the Imago of Mont lllanc had no power lo efface the dcltghu of the "spring lot" The Ktwer upon us of a si e of thought lien partly In the extent of out Intimacy with it Atlantic. A messenger "boy," aged seven ty, U in the ample v of the Western t'nlon Company at Bradford. Conn. A luoevcnger boy of that age ha prob ably gone on at least a doen errands in hi earner. -I'Uuhurgh Chronlclo Telegraph, Thsi "good old time." jeorgy. were the days when your great grand father was worklag (tHirtcarn hour a day to get a corned-beef dinner and pay the mortgage on the farm you have cut up Into city lot. Ciuctn natu wa a better man than Nero; but ha didn't have o much fun. - rnrJIATIC INSTINOT. Vta Ou.ir l'.i leateeaee " t Ra kalllatiliig MrtUaary smri. There aie many people who an neither dramatist nor novelist bjr profe-islon. but who yet have such a keen eye for "effect" that tbujr may ho said to be both. Mae fane-writers, such people are quick to see a "situation." and, If neces sary, to make one, in order to indulge in a little cheap theatrical display. It would not be difficult to show that al most every man of genius or poetlo temperament has Indulged more or U,a iii litis at nuitv: iii fnanv crises. doubt,,.Hi whh(mt llltendln)r Hiiy harm 1 by ,h Hnll,8l01l or untruthfulness, m)o veuUlfd U) rfin)ln(1 Aixhll. d).e J)lniM th4t H KW!rdoie had ,tr,(.tly , ,.,.,,. ance with the truth. "No.' he said frankly, "it wa not, I know; but the itory was nvor so muoh better ad I told It." The same desire ha influenced, nnd will Influence, thousands of er sons lu embellishing a story. Uuiug a novelist, Duma may erhapd be ex cused for giving play to hi imagination for the sako of heightening "effect;" and the dame excttdo could be urged In favor of those novelist who, in record ing their "personal exerieuce," hardly over allow one to low sight ef tho fact that they are Htory-tollurs by profession. So much of their time I spent in contriving situations that it i not at all surprising that they aro often tempted to stray from tho path of absolute truthfulnoss. The general public, however, ha no such excuse. Yet so keen I the dramatic instinct with many people that they contrive "situations" with a fertility of re source that would make many novelist wild with envy. Hut tho dramatiu instinct is mostly displayed in the tell ing of stories, in connection with which "truth is," no doubt, "a sad hampcrer : of genius," because it la comparatively rare in real lifo that experiences lit lo wUh preconceived notions. These--w'nether owing to lunate ideas or from a loving study of fiction is more than need bo determined aro frequently ro mantic in tho extraamo. Kit. Hoodls confessed that in ail the comedies and romances he had read tho hero hail al ways a go-between a valet or humble follower who performed the intrigue of tho piece; and consequently he se lected some subordinate to carry hit letters to Minna liwe, notwithstand ing that ho might easily have given her them himself. There may he u good deal underlying this little bit ol satire. In private life the love of ef fect'' is generally pernicious. Kvery laxly remembers that tho Immortal I'ecksniffalwayscontrivcd to inform his daughters of the coming of any viiitor in order that they might he found suit ably employed; and vntj body remem bers, morcovor, that those charming girls were greatly surprised and blushed furiously when the visitors ar rived. Chamber's Journal. DANIEL BOONE'S COMRADE. in , hi, ( Man vv I,,, rnufht Indlaa wltli II111 Kentucky ritmr. John L 1'. McCune, who waa the oldest mini in Clark County Ind., died recently at the homo of his daughter, Mrs. C. C. White, at Chnrledlow n. He wild a native of Jessamine County, in this Slate, and was born March A, 1798, lie served in the war of ISIS, He par ticipated in the battle of Tippecanoe, and was in the light at Thinned. Octo ber 10, 1(19, where he saw Tccumseh fall. With Daniel Hoono he was on the most intimate terms of acquaintance, un. I mu.le many Indian tuts with him. After settliug ut Chai-lcstovvu he learned the trade of shot-making and followed it for a living, making foot wear for many of tho most famous law vers, judges, doctors and other pro fessional men of the early history ol Indiana, When QenareJ William Henry Harrison visitmt Charlestovvn Mr. Mc Cune, who had heard of hid coming in advance, made an exceedingly line pair of boots for him, which were presented to the old warrior. In his dav Mr. McCune was a great fiddler, and upon a still evening the .notes from his violin could be heard nil over the town, as he sat in his front door playing upon hi favorite instru ment. He nits u familiar figure at the annual meeting of the old settlers, and was always, down 011 the programme for an exhibition of his skill on the violin. At these gatherings he lu variably played two pieces, which were his favorite. "Washington's Wedding March" and "Martha Wash ington's Lamentations." At the meet ing Inst fall he at tempted to carry out his part, but his strength hud so failed him that only the faintest sound could be hoard a his stiffened arm drew the bow across tho strings of his fiddle. A few years since his wifedied. This wits n great shock to him. and so sure was be that he would soon follow that he made all preparations for his death, even lo buying mid having set up his tombstone, with all the engraving done upon it but the date of his dentil. It Is located in the extreme western portion of the Charlivstowu i-ometory and attracts the eye of every stranger w ho enters the ground. The peculiar part of it is a small type of Mr. Mc Cune, which is surrounded by a glass covered frame and set in the marble. He is divssed in his shop garh. and on his knee is a partially mended shoe, w hile in his hand Is a hammer. The peculiar attitude and the fact that 1 live man hail his picture adorning the tombstone which wa to mark his grave was frequently commented oil. lxuivillo (Ky.) letter. A ritlsliurgh doctor says he can diagnose ailments by examining a single hair of the patient Two young men, as a joke, took him a hair from a bay horse. The doctor gravely w rote a prescription, and said hi fee was twenty five dollars, as the case was prwuriou. They were staggered, but paid the fin-, and after they got out, laughed all the way to the apothecary's. The latter look the prescription and read in nimuemcnt: -One bushel of I, four quarts of water, stir well A'nl giv.. three times a day - and turn be animal out to grass!" Then the W-.- t-wuued lauvhUi THE GHEtK ACTORS. tow Tli.r lrd J Huw Tb"r -altl 111 ll VI '"' It was customary U increase the tatureof the actor, by the ' tl...rnu.orbu.kln-a kind o h gh loot, ornamented In front and having .layer of ,lc some three Inch, s thick. I'he cothurnus was P"'" lhU,me nloraH.be robe worn. In addition ..this, masks covering the whole head ,ml face were used, tin the top. over C forehead, was a lofty front b t o onlcal form, which must have added jonsiderablytothe stature and dignity f tho actor: Inside the mask there went, to have ton UM oontrivun." lor strengthening the power of the ,olce to enable ll to fill the Immense .pace of the auditorium. Hell-shuped fosselsof hroiae are said to have Iss-n 1 ..( tb ihontci- j.laoiKl in various para I, reflect the sound, and the actors wen. subjected to a severe course o. I ulnlng both as to power and modii hUlOtl ol voice. Many of the actors t.ore inc.. of position nnd ln ' nonce in Attic society. Ud more than one had been intrusted with diplomatic and other mission-. II ...,..il ii.es 1 he ooct himself played m I is own compositions, as Acsohv his ll laid to have done. It may inlnv-i I .me of the ciaft ol tho prcdt-iil day to urn that as 11 uch as a talent (n.-ai i.v ootids, has been paid to an actor cf nolo for two performances. There were only three performers in sH-uk-Ipg parts, the others were silent: ln ffeed, they could not have spoken hud Ihev tried, for their masks had th- ..a 1 Lll. i.rillce of the mouth closeu. vviiin I bote worn by tho principal actor and iis two subordinates were constructed with tin- mouth oKn in tho shape of un O. No women were allowed lo net. Ihe female nulls being taken. Its III Shakespearean Union with us. by boys in- young men, not only on tnc stage ilseif, but in tho chorus. Sophocles, when u youth, was selected for his VMM and bounty to lead the choral dau. c at the festival given in honor of Ihe victors at Sulnmis. The dNHM worn on the stage la.ro no resemblance lo the ordinary Athenian costume, but were probably a modification of the festal robes worn in the old Dionysitic procession, anil consisted of flowing robes of purple and yellow ami other brillhint hues, crowns or ohaptete, and TO Oroide red girdles. These rob -s were lengthy as to cover the feet, and were common to all characters, male as well as female. Chambers' Journal. The Future of Russia. Not only Is Kussia the great eel military power In the world, but she the EuropeM power with the 1 largc-t homogeneous population nnd the greatest expansive force i'er rltorinlly she has the largest empire, possessing a vnel share of the old world, and hero is a people full of patriotic and religious spirit and so well disciplined that all except un in- Hnitoomul minority obey cheerfully and without question under nil circum dtanees. whether good or evil, the will of a single man. Yet, although sub ject to what, with our parliamentary itleild. Wa urc disposed to style despot ism, the Kttssinn people lire full of spirit unil of those qualities which wu i-oii'ider specially Anglo-Saxon "pluck" and "go." Ktissin has ab sorbed with rapidity, hut with com pleteness, tho greater part of central Asia, has drawn steadily neurcr and nearer to Our frontier and has made herself extremely popular with Un people she ha-conquered. Her policy throughout the century has been up pareiiVy fixed in object, hut pursued with patience: and while there see in to be no reason to suppose any prob ability of a speedy collision, which F.nglnud will do nothing to provoke, it is impossible for thine who are din ged with the defense of India to shut thuir eyes to tho poaalblUttts 01 even the probabilities of 'he future. Fo tnightly Review. Electric Mountain Railway. One of the most interesting achieve incuts in modern engineering is the electric mountain railway reoently opened to the public ut the Hurgcn stock, near Lucerne. The rails de scribe one grand curve formed upon an angle of 112 degrees, and the sys tem Is such that tho journey is made as steadily and smoothly as iiH.n am of the straight funicular lines. The Hurgenstock is almost pertendiculur. from the shore of Lake Lucerne to the Hurgenstock is 1,880 foet, ami it is '.'.Mtiifoet above the level of the se t The total length of tho line is 888 me ters, audit 10111mc11.es with agradi-nt of 8S per cent., which is incrcasi d 68 per 0011L after tho first 4il meters, this being maintained for the rest of the journey. A single pair of rails i MSjd throughout, and the motive pow er, electricity, is gouc rated by two dynamos, each of twenty-five horse powe , which aro worked by a water wheel of nominally 12.". horse-power, 1 reeled upon tho river Aar at its mOUth at Htiochs, three miles awm, the electric current being conducted by mentis of insulated copper wires. The loss in trnnsmission is flit I mated at twenty-live fuf cent JL Y. Sun. The president of Michigan Uni versity remarks in his annual report mat a larger proportion of women than of men are taking by choice the ' full classical course," for the practical 1 reason Hint there is a demand for their services in teaching (ireek in prcpara- I torv schools. - The girl who can't play on the ! piano, and wont play on the piano. ' deserves bnkM medal, anyway, fui not trying Somerville Journal." I be 17, hie has to he printed In went) nine different languages to sup t.u 1.... . 1 , . . !-.. aaa. "l'pie living In IVtlnsy lv ania. 1 M largely varied industries of lVim vlvnnia attract to that State a more cosmopolitan population than any tttkW Mate in the I'nion. Ihe "highest price on record" for a SMtaRt stamp was real. .-J recently at the mart, lokv-nhouse-yard. .,don when an unusual 4-otml Hritt,h (iutana stamp of IK. was knocked down to dealer for S2.VI. The aame gentleman also bought a similar stamp, wnlch however, had bee,, through the pit, HrHSJ THE AUSTRIAN FORCES. Mmfakfii wttl roves taall Aim Ml l.rlllr l taMWSaMM! It is 1 hnrie n ri-t c of Austria that, while every body i convinced that war is coming, the F.inpoi-or 1 holding duilv councils with the chlofs of the army and navy nnd the delegations are convened to pa-s war loans. Austria Is making herculean efforts to furnish her tfUOpt lH vv repeating MM. I'1'9 factorv at Sb-vr. where the oeratlves have been raited from 4,000 to 7.000, b now employed twenty-four hours a day on the Manlicher rifle. Everywhere extra drills ure being imposed: troops are being moved to frontier stations; the lines are crowded with munitions of war. In Hungary grand popular on thuoUum prevails; the volunteers for the landsturin are already tripling the mmila-r required by law and the women are forming hospital societies. Austria Is reported to have summoned hor land wehr outside of the country to return Immediately and join their colors. She has made during the last few year greater sucrifi. os than any other nation in RtirOpe. Her military educational es tablishments and systems of training, both elementary and professional, for officers and nun are of a very high order. Austria, like (ionnany and ltus sin. talks pence but ucts war. The military council at Vienna has decided in favor of spending 88.000,000 of florins on tho defenses of Galicia which Is threatened by Kussia, uud Qermany approTtM th move. The Austrian Cabinet expreeiM tbo belief that good relations with Prussia will bo maintained, hut all the same the rival powers hold the dogl of vvnr in loose leash. Count Ivulnoky is a peace minister, but even he felt that a cate gorical answer must ho made to the de mand regarding Kussian intentions 00 tlte frontier of (iali.-ia. With regard to Kussia, Austria and Germany are act ing as one nation. Austria will take no steps without (ierranny's approval. While not during to lesson her military preparation she will choose to face the fortunes of war rather than face con tinuously Magyar dlaoontent and Mus covite hatred. Austria has been termed the "com polite'1 empire. She has had tin dis astrous campaigns, yet Francis Joseph is as completely the sovereign H Will iam 11. is in Prussia. No minister lives for a day und--r his displeasure: every order of importance Is referred to his will, uud when he has decided discus sion ends. The strength of the Haps burgs was laid centuries ago in a mili tary autocracy. Of tho live great states of Europe, Austria is supposed by some to he tho one most loosely knit, hut of the live it is tho one which It Would in- tho htwdeat to sever. The animal instinct of extreme danger binds the units of Austria together, and in. luce tli.-m. with a political wisdom for w hich they get insufficient cn-.lt, to leave their executive, like their army, one and undivided. Tho Em peror is tlte pivot. Unquestioning obedience is paid to his orders. Chi cago l imes. RED TAPE METHODS. Tlie Rldlealeui Way III Wlili li Sums lliitr matenl Baslaaai is frmuaetasl, 'There is one thing tho Administra tion ut Washington ought to do," said Congressman Crain of Texas, at the Actor House the other day. "It ouj;lit to make a clean sweep of the ridiculous, expensive and slow red-tape methods. For half a contury tho methods have Ikm-ii growing complicated until at last the head of ti department is ut the com plete mercy of clerks w ho have been trained in these complications. Ke cently a case was reported to me which indicates thu absurdity of the system that waste the time of employes and delay publlo business, A man wrote to tin- PostofHce Department, inclosing a two-rent stamp. He said ho had used a stump that had not been effect ively canceled and his conscience troubled him, nnd therefore ho sent this stamp in payment Then, here is what happened: "The letter with the two-cent stamp was entered of record in tho book of 'letters received' in tho Posttnastcr Qenerml's offioe. The chief clerk, put his Indorsement on it, and a messenger carried it to the Third Assistant Post- tnaster-Ueneral, There the notice ol its arrival went Into another hook of "letters received,' and then the Third Assistant referred it to the finance di vision. The chief of tho division took the two-cent stamp, pasted it upon the letter, drew his pen twice across the stamp, wrote under it 'can celed.' and signed his name. A clerk signed below as witness to the transac fft.11. Then the letter went into the tiles to be preserved for future genera tions of offloeholders to marvel over. Now, what do you think of such busi ness as that?' "Well. Unit Isn't My thing," siid one of the Signal Service offloers employed neat- New Y'ork, who happened to be present. "Just look at us. The Ave hundred men in the Signal Service corps arc paid monthly their army pay proper, commutation of rations and commutation of quarters mid fuel. The Paymaster tieneral sends each nmn a check for his pay proper, for which he signs duplicate vouchers: the Commis sary Uenerul semis each man a check for his commutation of rations, for Which he signs , iplicate vouchers, and the bureau semis wach man a check for his commutation of quarters and fi Al for which he signs duplicate vouchers. Here are three aWOtMata where one ii BOUgh ; three letters inclosing thre checks, and the employment of a num ber of uttneivssary clerks, simply ts pay u our little monthly dues. Red tape? Well, yes: and it is expensiv, to the Sovernment and troublesome U us as eU."--N. Y. Star. Sermons nt 11 ome. - Kcal goou man (to his minister) -' It seems to me that I take cold when in church -used to warm. dry. sunny rooms, you know, and if you don't object I should like the privilege of having a telephone aiiactiment made lo your desk so that when I rear to venture to church I can at least bear the sermon " Minister (delighted I "Certainly, certainly. Have it fixed at any time." Ri al good man (tue following Sunday "Ja-son, wnai i mat lallc? Jason (a valet) The sermon In your sounding telephone, sir." -Oh. I forgot Put a blanket over It-' ' ' THE WOMEfi OF CUBA rassals netasw ' Unlsyse Type - jreaslnlas Le valines The women of a country aro a'way objects of great Interest and curloaity to strangers. Those of Cuba have 11 reputation for being botWalfuL It Is even suid that no other civilized coun try prOdOOM so many generally comely, in one way this is true, in another it is not, for the kTtrtfe Cuban beauty, outside of Cuba, would be consideted any thing hut lieniitl ful. Ah the background is skilfully contrived to bring out the picture, so tho tropical clime seems to have been especially designed to show to the liest possible advantage tho tropienl bounty. She appears to have been created to lie In a rocking-chair and lazily wield a fan to and fro with a graceful charm positively bewitching. Her thin, gauzy garments i-eveHl to the best possible advantage her exquisitely-molded form, her loose, tangled black half, the Oriantul splendor of her big, dark, almond-shuped eyes, which blaze, and sparkle, uud glow, anil soften, and send forth wonderful lights, and never, never fade until the end. Her face is oval, if not rounded by a superabundance of flesh; he.' mouth smull, full, red; her teeth little, and white, und even. Her hands and feet are liny and well ibtped, but In her zeal to whiten her skin that it muy afford a proper con-ira-t to the negress or muliitlo who atte.ids her she daubs It over with n quantity of rice powder until the effect in many cases is positively ghastly. She has another weakness which is ap parent, und that Is jewels of all kinds ind descriptions. With these she lit erally bedecks herself, winding long BhainS about her neck and SITUS, stick ing brooches, and pitta, uud peut-ls in the meshes of her long hair, and tilling her slender lingers with rings which weigh them down and her ours with big stones which almost hide them from view. The graceful mantilla of Spain is in universal use. It is fast mnd also by jewels and held in place by a OOmb placed high on the top of the head The Cubanu. in her rooking uhairand loose-flowing, flimsy gown, would be eonsidcrc 1 nothing more or less than a shiftless sloven in un American Northern home, where thrift nnd energy un 1 neatness prevail. Hut in Cuba, beneath the silvery branches of the spreading palm, where Blustering Orange trees glisten in the sunlight and w here the orioles Hit like Hashes of gold among Ihe nlivo trues, there she finds her natural surrouad ings i.nd makes perfect a tropical pL-t-ure which would bo Incomplete witti- 9tlt her. Ha van.-. Letter. BE OF GOOD CHEER. in. Bteadjr, Provident I , 1 Never 1 ..ii,-- to Art mil Wiii "A limner never crossed the thresh i.ld of our almshouse." So said Mr. King, the superintendent of u Ma sa ihuseltl almshouse, in the lariiters' meeting at Poston recently. The itatemeul is significant, fu'l of mean ing. It can not he said of all the ii'nis houscs of tho country, perhapi, but the exceptions are not numerous enough to disprove the rule. If u farmer goes to the poor-house it is be-i-utiso he has been improvident, lazy, intemperate, or (in one case in u thousand) peculiarly unfortunate. The stendy. industrious, provident hu-incr never comes to actual want. This is 11 fact, nnd it is one thai ought to give Mmfort and comparative content to thousands ol husbandmen who to-day are disheartened and almost ready to give up the weary struggle of years. You may have a heavy loud to carry; bear it bravely, it will lighten. The energy born of determination und sustained by manly pluck will alone make it easier to carry, and in good lime will enable you to throw it off. It is the final charge that wins tho battle. No one ever yet succeeded by losing heart in the conflict. The weak succumb at the first appearance j! trouble, und all is then lost; what worse could possib'y result if you struggle bravely until overcome? You may bo apparently hemmed in by lowering difficulties. 1 ut there is a way out, and it is your duty to find it. Do not sit down in desnair und nnrav , listlngly let your burdens crush vou. In. . . Mien a course is weak, unmanly anil lurely disastrous. Stand up like a man. made in the imago of Cod. and bravely face your troubles. Attack them with all tho force and will of your being. It Is tho only way to suc OCed, and the only one worthy of man hood. Ohio Farmer. The World and Chance. How often might 11 man after he had jumbled a set of letters into a bag lling them out upon the ground before they would full into un exact poem, yen, or so much as make a good dis course in prose. And may not a little book be as easily made by chauco us this great volume of the world? How long might a man lie sprinkling colors upon canvas with a careless hand be fore they could huppen to make the exact picture of a man? And is man easier made by chance than his picture? How long might twenty thousand blind men, who should bo sent out from several remote places in our country, wander up and down before they would meet upon the Itappahannoek and fall into rank and file in the exact order of an army? And yet this is more easy to be imag ined than how the innumerable blind parts of matter should rendezvous themselves into a world. N. Y. lA-dger. To the true-born Westerner, in whom the instinct of moving on t0 finj a more desirable country never dies, not even the IVif c ooeau can be a barrier. A man of this class, who had lived successively ina number of StaUs nnd Territories between his native Ohio and his present home in California. one day luul a revival of his migratory ' longin ' He most b 1 , - - . hi- 1 1 p anil "go west" -But howcan vou get anv farther west than California?" he was Stat. -Pbaw!" he answered There t.lentv of west l.,ft -ii .1 I through Mexican California and South . A 1 r 1 . -. TV. ' - ll . . reru ow ,j jV(j I "ood de' the mines down I there I tell you. sir." he cried, warm I 2 i h Ms subject, mutK , I Htv oou.u, Peru!" IN TUT ,., '"ACK How ft MMeavte si.ulll b " - ,,! 1 1 I I .ll I i.i'it ,. OaW TO follow him to ih ni-ti, nu .k.n . 8 ndj ... The .all. power,,,,, I!"' -11. 1, in - aitirou 111 u suit of allrk r S i..u, t .. "I'D ii "I lilt! h In,, I . ... , . . ul , story com DOUSt In n da a 11111114a i 11 11 , 1 I. I -ii... nun u 1 ' - :i .... .:..... . " V S . Kong district of Cla -k sires t N The watcher as wid t. .. ....i i 1 aua . awake uie sinuous tutu nol vet cloj, "t niirbt. -"Ufa. night It was evident ho win m mini. L- . .. roiii-igoig 1 ruin tbe ..ii.. , lowed stealthily the object of h J suit, like a sleuth-hound on 7Ha its prey. Mot-Ins alio,, 1 '' of the buildings and haltin ! . then, but never relaxing fr , "S siani ms eager WatOhfulnssi h k his man in sight for nearly an J1? Down Clark to Harrison ' iitli 1 isuii ill 1110 llVyr n,.,. II lo..- . .1.. , bridge to Canal, up ('anil t jj J , " - "reel torfflll, and mini, a weary block tnotwi t singular-or rather plural-,," sion. "He little thinks in in f.t. IIIW lfn. H-.ii-, mi ti,, t . I Ik. .ilTl '"USS 1111111. .. i, aua icciiiiess pilr-t shallow mm to tils bur now wif.lt tab. till the next centennial! At last the man whom he a. l lowing halted at a modest tl,'. . opened the gate Hint afforded entrjr,,, to the little yard in front, and a ! auruev 10 ciose 11 nis im-e, pluinlv loio 111 tUB glare 01 a street la... ,, by, was for one brief moment to the hawk-like gaze of the mvs. oils pursuer in the durk blue nth, L hud crouched in the shadow of H k ly Indiuii cigar sign acro-sthe,av 1 tie nexl msliint lie bud dlaa vv 11 1 1 1 1 1 tue noiise. With 11 smothered cry of exultatka sue eager watcner look nut lata book and pencil and jotted dots 1 memorandum. His Sogers tremb with excitement. "I saw his face!'' he said, In a hvv torionl whisper. "I was not mhu And now 1 have Ms Street and number. At last I am on the trail. If he f.nj, out any thing about that mystertoal disappearance I'll know ju,st where h goes to got it. Hal At lust! Ai Ijgf. a a . He wns a high-priced detective shadowing a fifteen-dollar a week new spaper reporter to see f ho omu Bad some clew to the latest tnyttvi that was baffling lbs entire iuiw. Chlcago Tribune. GRAND CANARY FUNERALS. 1 he pen'ah liuriut Oereainsi smi Cn, mat 1111 liy Quekllmft, Slowly the head of 11 funeral nrSMS sion appeared from the street h, tea Bishop's palace uud began to glide lie- tvv.-.-n the promenade ami th t chares, Four laughing ncoiyb-j in scarlet est socks, with eriiciliv js ar 1 gihlisl lam; on staves, came Urst The nriesl file his book ottpto '.-',xt. attended on ssci side by a bjy v i n a lamp to illuminate Ills pages. Uj sang the service sske stiinibieil over the uneven itOlAtSl I lu- street. The body, under 11 pall, curried by four men, who were, at tecded by a knot of others for their re lief, followed the Driest, and thru, in long parallel linos came the friends and relatives of the deceased, with lamps interspersed among them, in the number of about two hundred, The heavy lava portal of Hie cemetery bj tho seashore hears the InsortpOost "Do not be deal to the voice that Islli you nil is illusion except death." Here all the lamps siv two wore pnffedOSi by the boys, and most of the m ttn turned on their heels, and, with frwh cigars between their lips, returned to the city. Ton Or twelve of us. however. K tximpanied the chief mourner vvitiim the gates. A man with n sack nf llaw on his shoulder and a pipe i ah month, walking with the arrogance tk one proud vvitliout cause, precedents coffin as it was lifted from iron stair-rim- tt. stair-oase until we reached tti particular niche In the high "oolosv barium" which wns to receive it. 1 hen it wns iet on tlio ground, the lid 'us removed and the man with the llaw elliptic , ho contents of his sack over the deceased woman, methodieslajf spread ing and pressing it until tMv ing wns visible of her except the siniill. well-shod feet. He kept his pipe iii'lis mouth during this operation- lit chief mourner, while minutely watch ing the process attendant upon tli" bit rial of his mother, found time Ifl light u cigarette and chat with hU friends, and the two remaining aeolvte grinned and played tricks by boWhl their lumps so that curious shadow Buttered over the (lend woman and the lime-mun. At length th- latter loos up with an interrogative grunt: ,'Are yon siitisfied. sei.or?" -lVrfc-tly." W plied the chief mourner. Tho lid was replaced, the coffin run energetically into its spfwtl groove, and ull wns ended IweBkJ" four lioucti ago the d'-ceascd was ulive and well; twenty-four hours beOCS -h" will bo half cremated. -tiibraluu Tlmea, -A tVisconsin man has patentsd fence for inten-epting Utieeta. H made with Imards jointed togetbertat their ends, with a tarred rope it their upper edge, and an outwardly estSSO' laig boartl made to form a channel, whereby bugs will bo prevented fro passing from one field to another, will be resvived in a receptacle where they can be destroyed. Gladstone once remarked that if h were a foreigner obliged to learn the Knglish language, he would go insane. It is no wonder foreigners tnink the Knglish language so difficult to nnwie' when we think of the great chan; that a single letter makes in ihe pro nunciation of it. The letter t changes lover into clover. makes a crow s crowd, k makes eyed keyed, g ejsnafte on into a song. I transforms a pea inu.a pearl, s changes a hoe into a shoe, f make hough bought, 10 -lters o'uee into aumen.