Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About The Eugene City guard. (Eugene City, Or.) 1870-1899 | View Entire Issue (Sept. 4, 1886)
OF GENERAL INTEREST. Tbo New Haven Register ny: "I.u article on Yslo yesterday, for 'alum water' read 'alma muter" The United State have nearly three times as many doctors as En gland, ami nearly (our times a many M France in proportion to tlie popula tion. A Chinaman recently arrested at Grass Galley, Lai., lor running an onium joint committed suicide the Doium joint ei mtrht following night following by hanging himself in the prison cell with Inn cue. A private coachman ran not bo blamed for marrying an heiress for her money, hut when a man in society Stoops so low as to do such a thing hu should le kicked. A'. 0. l'iatyune. Most of the hair that in made up In this country into hangs, braids and twists comes from Kurope, Germany and Switzerland sending thousands of pounds of It every yvar. Chicago Sun. A female in New Orleans recently caused the arrest of a policeman for calling her a woman. The judge de cided that she was a woman and dis charged the policeman. N. 0. Time. A novel summer tour along the . Erie canal is advertised as "possessing some of the characteristics and none of tbe risks of an ocean voyage, free from the cinders of a train, and less arduous than a balloon trip." Buffalo Express. An English advertisement reads as follows: "A voting man, sober and reliable, who has a wooden leg and cork arm, is willing for a moderate salary, to allow his false limbs to bo maimed by wild beasts in any reput- huiu menagerie, as an auvuiiiseiuun. No objection to traveling. In these, days, when two-headed and four-legged chickens are hatched on every firm, It is a positive relief to read that Owen Craven, of Kan dolph County, Mo., has ft one-legged Plymouth Rock chick that is perfectly ' Iiealthy and hops about on its one le with apparent pleasure. Chicago Her ald. An albino baby was born recently ntllnrrisburg, l'a. It has a shapely littlo head, luxuriously covered with hair as white as snow, of lino texture, and sutler than silk, and the indica- tions.are tli'at it will havti similar eye brows. The eyelashes are long and white and beneath them are pink eyes of wonderful brilliancy.- -FhUailclphia irm. . v irginia for a time taxed sales of liquor at two cents a 'drink, and re quired barkeepers to bo provided with boll punches lor registry. Ihe Mate bought the instruments at five dollars each and sold them to the rumsullers at ten dollars. They were afterward taken back upon the repeal of the law, ana tliu Mute has now sold them at auction for six cunts each. Chicaqo Journal. It Is estimated that twenty-five acres of grass land are necessary to Keep an annual me year round in Ari zona. The total acreago of the Terri tory is about 48,000,000. On this basis it is easy to estimate Its capacity for came raising, isut a serious drawback la water, 'lhis will have to be supplied by artesian wells if at all. As yet only about half of the grazing area Is occu pied. a. x. ittegram. A mammoth gum tree in the woods near Cambridge, Md., has for years been used by an eaglo for tho rearing of her young. Tho tree has been out down after groat labor. The nest at the top was found as large as a cart- body, and contained two young eagles nearly iuu Hedged, llio birds sur- , vlved tho shock, and have been cared for as pets. The old bird was out on a foraging excursion at the time. A special eommittco on railroad axles has reported that Iron axles are safer than steel axles; that all cranks should have tho webs hooped; that as Iron cranks appear to fail after run ning soino 200,000 miles, and steel after 170.IMK), it Is highly desirable that they should be taken olf and not again used on passenger engines; and that crank axles, properly constructed, are as strong as straight axles. Chicago Times. r An enterprising young man of Now York City abandoned the beaten paths of industry a short time ago and invented a new occupation. Ho hired small hoys to break store windows, and then ottered to protect tho windows for twenty-live cents a week. He was . clearing eight dollars a week when ambition led him astray. He. struck for double pav, and falling, broke a window himself. For this indiscretion he was sent up for six months. .V. Y. JleraU. Eternal fitness: . sailor for sea. Ami spinmnr lor tea, A lawyer for tulkinjr ml a Soulier for light- I A Imliy for nnlne, And a circus tur bovs, And a tvpowr.ler disu to do autograph willing. A bunker foroh'nk A lid ft iiriiiti.r fur mlr A leopard for spots and a wahir for sticking! n umt' uit-n IW Ulllgor, OH l'l IIIKtT, l A shot gun, a mule and choir for kick ingJ Ihutlttlt I The velocity of light is so tro mendous.that asthejlluflulo Commercial Mverti.nr tigures it out, "it moves round the earth's surface, a distance of nearly twenty-live thousand miles, iu one-eighth part of a second." We re peat these ligures, says the New York. Fribune, for the benefit of the messenger-boy of the period. Ho would do well to cut thera out and paste them in hi hat. Not that he can ever hpo to cope with light in rapidity of move mont, but that tho contemplation of the feat of traveling twenty-live thousand milea in an eighth of" a second may stimulate him to break his own record of speed. Girl' Secreti. . The moment a girl hu a aecret from her mother, or hu received a letter she dares not let her mother read, or hu a friend of whom her mother doe not know, ahe Is in certain danger. A aecret is not a good thing for a girl to have. The fewer secret that lio in the hearts of women at ary age the better. It la almost a test of purity. She who hu none of her own is best and hap. piest In girlhood hide nothing from your mother; do nothing that, if dis corered by Your father, would make taf bluih. 1'ann and Firtsidt. IN ARGENTINA. lotrnttoff Arromrt if ths ' TrlouJIta.cc,;Ii'.'feHn Isfurtuttlon ConMrn(n( the One Mneta In llueoot Ayr: Argentina is the cream of South Tem perate America. It stretches through thirty degrees of latitude a distance of 2,300 miles, with an average width of more than 600 miles, covering a plat of 1,200,000 square miles. Spread this field out over the United States and it will cover all the territory east of the Mississippi river, and have enough left to carpet England, Wales, Ireland and Scotland, nnd the German empire. It could nearly house a second protestant ism. Walking through the capital IJuonos Ayres one can easily imagine himself in almost any city of sourthern Europe. Most of tho languages of southern Europe are falling upon his ear. One can hardly enter a store without having goods offered In four or five languages, till one is found that will best tit the customer. German was usually tried on me first. In tho hotels everv "tongue is spoken about one except English, and that also in a few of the best hotels, but little English is needed. One often hears in a group of six or eight persons conversation in Spanish, Italian, trench, Portuguese, German, with occasional English. Whilo much of the business is in the hands of English-speaking people, they have taken up the languages of the country to reacn tne peqple, who learn the kindred languages of the south of Europe but seldom learn English. One meets edu cated people who handle tho English with great succors, but theso are tho exceptions. There is a saying down hero that "the English and North Americans get on so well in life because they learned the English; after English, nothing Is dillicult." Tho 3. 250,000 that make up the aggregate of the population of the Argentine Kepublic, are distributed as to origin in tho following pro portion: Argentines (not including tho children of foreigners), 07 per cent.; Italians, 12 per cent.; Spanish, 6 percent.; French 5 percent.; English, I per cent.; Germans and Swiss, 2 per cent.; all others, 6 .per cent. Theso figures will indieato what changes are to be wrought before English becomes the langungo of the country. Tho largest and most powerful English colony of tho world is in this city pf Piuenos Ayres. It does much of the business, and publishes two daily news papers, with an aggregate circulation of less than 3.000. On our journey to Paraguay we found not one person able to speak English, though our steamer wu crowded with shifting passengers. Two lads returning to college In Corri entes said they had studied English three years. When we asked thera what they had read in English they re plied, aftor considerable choking and twisting of the throat; "Check Spec," by which they meant Shakespeare, lhat was the only English they could speak, and they wero unable to under stand, a single word. Tho little Spanish community in New York, with its Spanish paper, will make North America Spanish a soon u the English community here will make South America English. Reckoning the children born in Ar gentina as natives and there is no reason for not so reckoning thorn there are 17 por cent of foreignera in the population, as compared with 13 per cent, in tho United States, 8 per cent in Switzerland, 8 per cent, in HrauII, 2 per cent, in Chili and France, nnd 1 per cent in England. Immigra tion is rapidly increasing. In 1860 there nrrived o,6.r6 immigrants; in 1865, 11,767; in 1870. 3!l,(i67; in 187.5, 42.066; In 18H0, 41,618; in 1883, 63,200; In 1884, 71,400; in 188., tho returns, not yet published, an) expected to reach 100,000. Theso immigrants taken to gether for ten years show Italians, 70 per cent.; Spaniards, 10 per cent.; French, 10 per cent.; German and Swiss 4 per cent.; English 2 per cent.; others 4 per cent. Among the for eigners the birth-rate is higher and the death-rate less than anions? tho natives. These facts indicate a tendencv toward a change In the diameter of tile nconle of this country. llislwn Fowler, in Chicago A'ctci. JUVENILE KINGS. O... of tl.. r.u.M of the Itoyal I..e.,l.y Mr True I rlviiiUlilp. Boy Kings aro not whipped, they j any; but neither aro boy grocers, 1 nowadays; and, if restrictions are use- f.il, there may bo as many of them in a palace as anywhere. "Your Majesty must not make mudpics." Tho his tory of young Princes is usually a his tory of over-restriction, carriod in cases one has heard of to the vcrgo of the pathotio, the sense of responsibility weighing Incessantly not only on nurses and tutors, but on the closest relatives. who not infrequently regard calumny m to their treatment with a paralyzing dread. No ono is so little forgiven m mo momer oi a rung wno is a failure; the memoirs of her child' reign are sure to begirt with sniteful anecdotn. of her and her possibly imaginary mis- iiinun-iun uu iuo unijr real evil oi this kind a lad so placed must neces sarily guffer from is a certain want o! freedom in choosing companions, which Is nearly unavoidable, which slightly closes the heart, and which is? we fancy, one cause of that incapacity for friendship which close observers have reckoned among the faults of Kincs. They choose favorites, and not friends; aim mo unucuay oi nnding equals, or men who feel themselves their equals, Is not the only reason for that failure. Other boys brought up in too protected a life show precisely the same peculiar ity, a Want of belief in tha f rionrlMr. of" which they have no experience the menosuip, u ii is, in which there is the element of self-generated and inex plicable personal fancy. The ideal friends are not the friends you are ad Tised to take. Th4 Sitctator. A veritable "sink." akin to thai nf the Humboldt river, in Nevada, is in process of formation at the mouth of tha San lxren.o in California. Where for merly a Urge stream cut its way through the shifting sands to the ocean but a small ktream. easily stenoed ovnr can bo seen. NEW ZEALAND VOLCANOES. r.arih's Ureal Volimnlo K.rtii Only a few week ago ML Etna's eruption threatened Nicolisl and the surrounding fortilo valleys and vine yards of that region. Now the news conies of volcanic disturbances in New Zealand, tho antipodes of Etna, and of great loss of life resulting therefrom. New Zealand Is, by tho fastest ocean and railroad communication, about thirty days removed from Chicago. The steamship linos run from Auckland to San Francisco, and soma twenty-five days between these two points is con sidered good time, or nearly three t mus longer than the modern trip from New York to Liverpool. The group or cluster of islands composing New Zealand is divided into two main parts, known as North Island and South Island, Tho well-known city of Auckland Is on the North Island, w hich with its fine harbor is on every chart. Tho Islands are quite mountainous, go that the most intelligent and observant travelers and writers agreo that one tenth of the surface of the North Island and four-lifths of the South Island are occupied by mountains. Among tho extinct volcanoes of New Zealand tiro Ruanchu that is 9,100 feet high, and Mount Egiuoitt that is 8.3(H) feet high. Tongariro, which is o.SOO feet high, is occasionally active When .Mount Etna began to pour out smoke, ashes scor'ne, lava., etc., tho first to suiler severely were those whiifi:ViA vatod the vineyards thttf prodtieifct.tm'. rich friitag.t that grew on tho hillsides and in the valleys there. So the first hi New Zealand to fcol tho terrible rains and t'irrenU from tho suddenly awakened cr.u -r have been those who inhabited tlx: districts in tho immediate neighborhood of the disturbance. The mountain p -aks of New Zealand tiro ulio.it the same altitude as some of tho great Rockies back of Denver and I'lin-cniie, and would hold their placo biside Cloud Peak, tlie crest of thu Big flora range, and thus the valley aro t.i-ily commanded by them. 1 The natural wonders of New Zealand suggest a parallel with tho National Yellowstone Park. New Zealand has n it been visitud by any serious earth quakes or volcanic eruptions for somo thirty years. Tho last severe, earth quake "occurred January 23, 1855, but it was not attended by any fatal results. Three prominent places on the earth are mentioned where geysors exist with marked characteristics. Those are Ice land, tho North Island of New Zealand and the National Park in the Rocky Mountains. Geysers may bo described as volcanoes in which hoatod w.ttor, Inst a I of molt 'ii rock, is forced out from tho vent by tha escaping steam, and they occur in great abundance in districts in which subterrrnwin action is becoming dormant or extinct. The significance of tho parallel will bsssjn when it is stated that there are three active volcanoes in New Zealand. The thiory of a lvancod scientists is that th?re are groat bandi or systems of volcanoes, which are ranged along lines of fissures; and s mio also hold that the great 'fi;ar bands of volca noes, which stretch thousands of miles, havo had their positions determined by great lines or fissures in the earth's crust. Tho greatest of thesv band extends from the Arctic Circle at Bullr ing's Straits to the Antaretio Circle at South Victoria, and this incliidos more than half the activo volcanoes of the world. Tho gr tat focu or center of this intense vulcanic action may bo re garded as lying in thi district betweon Borneo and New Guinea. A largo number of lines radiato from this cen ter, ono of which embraces South Vic toria, New Zealand, tho New Hebrides, Santa Cruz, the Solomon Islands anil New Britain. Related, as it is s -en to be, to tho great volcanic system, it is not surprising that earthquakes, are re corded as having visited tltesn islands. Although, as already intimated, there havo b.-eii no serious shocks felt there since 1H.V, yot in Wi alone twenty eight shocks are mentioned, ten of which aro recorded as "smart," and tho I remainder as only slight tremors. Chicago In'er Own. I LINCOLN MEMORIALS. furniture and Hooks from the Old Sprlng- r Muld tloue and l.mv-Ortlcp. , w . flirninpIl. n, s " v - r""r iicm. in., uui now ot m:s city, lias fitted up a room which ho calls tho "Lincoln Memorial Room." All of the furniture was used by Abraham Lin coln, either in his house or his law ollico in Springfield prior to his de parture for Washington, D. C, to bo inaugurated President of the United St ites. In tho collection there is tho o.d ollico desk and b;ok-easo, tho old inkstand, ton well-thumbed law books; ono rolumo of the statues of Indiana, the first law-book that Lincoln ever read, and which belonged to David Furnham, his friend and comnanlnn In Indiana from 181!) to 1831; one leaf from his exercisn-book and his boy hood signature; six hair-cloth parlor chairs; ono marble-top table; ono mirror gjt in a gilt framo; one hearth rug; ono walnut cupboard; tho old mahogany-veneered sofa which was made by hand at Springfield in 1837 by Daniel E. Kuckel, on Mr. Linooln' or lor, and used by him until February, 1861; tho old hickory chair in which ho was seated when informed of his nomi nation to the Presidency; one carriage cushion and a photograph taken of him in May, 18o8. during tho cele brated campaign botween him and Stephon A. Douglas. The photograph represents him with his hair very much rumpled, and tho story in connection therewith is to tho efl'oct that when in tho photographer's studio one of his friend observed that hi hair w combed remarkably smooth. "That's a fact," he replied, "alid the picture won't look like mo." With that he ran his hand through his hair and made it look natural. Mr. Keyes only began his purchases some mouths back and has already gotten togethor a creditablo collection, which ho takes groat pleasure in ex hibiting to his frionds. Several letters from William II. Herndon, Lincoln's law partner, attest the genuiuenoss of a number of the articles. UUcaji Tnlunt, NERVOUS COUGH. An Affliction Who Tru Nature Is Not I'niTeraallr I'nderstood. One may have a bard, dry and vio lent cough, and yet the lungs, bronchial tubes and larynx be in a perfectly nor mal condition. Says Flint: "In most of the cases of this kind which I have seen, the cough ba,s a peculiar barking tone, and the pitch has been low, showing that the glottis wm dilated at the instant of coughing. In some cases, however, the tone is shrill and the quality of the sound croupal, showing spasm of the glotiis. In a case recently under ob-M-rvalion, the cough consisted of a single, short, hoarse bark, often repeat ed several limes a minute. It is some times in paroxysms, having a resem blance to those of whooping cough. Tho peculiar sound of tho cough, to gether with its frequent recurrence, and sometimes its violence, renders it dis tressing to those whose sympathies are excited, and annoying to others." It is mostly confined to femaics of hysterical tendencies. It may be in duced by involuntary irritation. A school for girls was once broken up by iL The slightest chango of tempera ture excito it, as do also penetrating odors. It is constantly attended by sneezing and snulling. Shadewald, who has recctilly given it special attention, found il could be pro duced by gently touching a ccrtainpoint within tho nostrils. This point is the termination of one of tho filaments of the trigeminal (or trifacial) nerve, and il is to its irritation that Shadewald re gards this cough as due. Hence he calls it the trigeminal cough It bears a striking resemblance to nervous asthma, nnd the latter is now thought to be the most pronounced form of trigeminal cough, with its scat within the nostrils. Ramifications of the trige minial go to the pharynx (tho back part of tho mouth), and also to a portion of the car, and hence this cough may some times be duo to trigeminal irritation in these parts, but it is most frequently met with from irritation of the nerve within the nostrils. Of course no treatment directed to tho throat or lungs will bo of any avail, nnd its persistence against nil ordinary remedies may cause tho gravc.-t fears, liut the peculiar barking tone of tho tough and a certain nervous character of tho patient may suggest its real na ture. The medical attendant should at onco suspect its trigeminal origin, if ho fails to find any organic explanation of it. All treatment should be directed to tho nasal nerve, and the main object siioum uo to lessen its undue excita bility. Galvanism is warmly recommended. Cauterization is often effectual, and so, for a time is a slight bleeding of the parts. The copious secretion to which iodide of potassium, administered in ternally, gives rise is helpful, by wash ing out tho irritating particles. In lighter cases, this and the inhaling of vapor nro often suflicient Youth' $ Companion. m 9 m NEW YORK FASHONS. The Tery Select Styles In Elegant Lace lioai and Straw BonneU. The new lace boas aro both useful nnd ornamental, nnd black and cream lace are alike useful in their manufac ture. Tho laco is arranged in such a way that it forms a rouleau correspond ing in size and shape to the fur boa. Most of these are about two and a half yards in length, nnd nro tied with rib bons a few inches below tho chin. Keady-madc, theso novelties aro expen sive, but a lady of taste can easily con struct one at about one-third the cost of thoso sold in the shops. Very expensive lace for their make is to be eschewed, because, when soiled, tho boa must bo discarded. They aro charming adjuncts to sum mcr toilets, and give a finish to nny pretty summer dress worn out of doors. Moreover, tho boa will be a protection for the throat when drivinc. coming out of church, or on any occa sion where one feels the need of slight extra clothing. Small d:irk straw princess bonnets, with the brims edged with a pulling of velvet, nnd a high coronet above," of hawthorn blossoms, lilacs, hedge roses, clover heads, snowballs, Jacquo buds nnd other line French flowers, nro fav orite head coverings, with tailor-made costumes of dove-gray nlbatross, mauve cashmere, silk-dotted veilings nnd the like. These nre charming. The ninny light-wool fabrics for tho tailor-made dresses nrc uncommonly clcant this season, and if artistically cut, which is a sine qua non, they aro tho perfection of summer wear. Emphasis must be given by repetition to what has before been said, that there is no street gown in which a woman looks better dressed than a costume of this d OSCritlt inn. tt'hon perfectly fitted, adding grace to a rounds cd form and roundness to a slender one, as many dressy additions have been made to theso bodices of theso gowns, which at lirst were too seyero and un adorned to prove becoming to all fir. ures. It is now quite tho fashion to make tip semi-transparent muslins over lio-ht foundations of batiste or sateen. Those look very dressy, more especially if a few knots of colored rib! on are added, and if the hat be trimmed with flowers to correspond. Dark blue and golden brown rough-and-ready straw hats are generally worn with such gowns. Tink and pale lilac India muslins are ex hibited with tiny flowers scattered over their surfaces, which arc to bo made up over foundations of plain pink or mauve. Ulack velvet ribbon is more used upon dresses of this sort than the quantities of lace that loaded tucm last year. .V. Y. Evening 1V Few people w.ll accept the remark able view on opium Miioking expressed by J. G. Scott, the traveler, in his book on Toiiquin. He averts that opium used moderately is at lctust no more liarnitiil than tobacco or alcohol, and that Ihe opium pipe is a positive blessing nftcr a hard day's march, or inconntries where fever fumes ri.-e thick out of the marshes aud jungle. He savs that it is only when a mail puts himself to sleep with a half dozen or more pipes that it becomes a curse. The opium habit is cry prevalent among the French sol diers in ludo-China. UNK'L ISAM'S STORY. ' How Good Bradder GaVl Divorced u 111- Matched Couple. "Ilitwuz dishyer way," saidUnk'l Isam, "I bring tor 'membunco, dar wuz Tildy an' Bob wuz dat luvin' an' fool tel nuthin' wad do but they mus' git may'd. "Now, olo Miss wuz mi'ty ticklar 'bout her niggers; sho Mowed dey mus' be quality niggers, des lak she wuz quality white fokes, an' she couldn't bide dese low-down ways uv doin'. So ole Miss built us n leetle frame church, nn' had us a for-trewginny wine preach er. Yes, ole lirudder Gab'l wuz sar tinly a good olo Methydis' preacher. When'st he tok a noshun ter hold a 'vival, he'd wake up dat whole planta shnn wu-s'n do 'hoopin'colf. An' sing? He could sing yo' po' soul plum ober do Kibb'cr Jordan. "Well, ble Miss sez, scz she: 'Ef Tildy an' Bob boon' tcr get may'd, let Gab 1 ma'y 'em by do book, an' I'll gib 'em a supper.' "Dat's do wny olo Miss wud do, fer she t'ought jis' as much 'n her niggers' souls cz dey bodies. She scz ter me of'n, scz she: ' "Isam, you's proud 'cayso you cos' yo' master three thousand dollars, when sum of do man's lak Peter fer instunz, only cos' two thousand dollars.' " 'Dat's nachul, olo Miss; dat's nach nl,' sez I. " 'But you mus' 'member dat Fetcr's soul is wufl'jes' cz much as yone.'ter de Lawd.' " 'Cose I couldn't argify wid ole Miss, but I 'low'd ter niyso'f dat 'twuz lucky do Lawd know'd a boss nigger when he 6eed Mm, an' olo Miss went on Member, ef yo' bodies is wallvblo yo' souls is much mo' so dey is white,' siio sez, ' ez whito ez mine; an she had us as sassy an' pompcred up 'bout our white fouls ez a struttin' peafowl. Oh, sho wuz wun bleesed 'oman. "I ain't got time to tell 'bout de wed d'n' dat ain't de p'int. Do p'int am dis," said Unk'l Isam, solemnly: "Dat ar sav-a-mony wuz spoke by book ober Tildy nnd Bob by lirudder Gab'l, tin' day wuz pernounccdman an' wife. "Fur nwhilcs T.ldy an' Bob livo liko bars what dun fouii' a honey tree wid no bees in it an' lots cr comb. "Arter whiles dey 'gun ter growl nn' spnt'cnsionally, an nttersix mont dey waz a scannel tcr tie whole plantashun, nn' dey cabin wuz lak dishyer one mos' t mes you pass dat er way. Kara-a-ty-blang Tildy scrcecbin', Hob cussin, do wool a-flyin 'twus awful in de sight ob de Lawd. "Ole miss talk ter um Bruddcr Gab'l 'spute wid um hit nebber fazo um. "One Sat'day nite Brudder Gab'l's Eashunz wuz clean tuckered out, an' e tuk holt on 'cm in arncst '"Cum np yer, ye fool niggers,' sez he, 'I'll stop dish j'eryowlin'. "Tildy an' Bob wuzskecred, an' cum. " 'Stan' up yer!' and Tildy an' Bob 6tun up, nnd I'm blest ter grashus ef Brudder Gab'l didn't whip out do book an' read dat ar say-a-mony back'ards ober dem fool nigga's an' tun 'cm plum aloose ag'in, ter go shet uv wun a nud der fer ebbcr an' ebbcr, amen. "Now,' sez Brudder Gab'l, 'you is no longer man an' wife, an' ain t got no showin' ter hack an' lum awav on wun a nudder lak may'd fokes duzf Ef yer eber goes anigh dat gal ag'n, Bob. may do firy charyyit cum down an' tak yer ter de lake bun'in wid fire an' brimstim. Tildy, I spec's ycr'll lit Bob erlonc, least 'wise tel dat wool grows out ag'in, what he dun naehally grabble of'n vo skull!' 6 1 "So, ntter dat. dere wuz neesn nn dnt plantashun, an' ef do uther niggers feel bleczed to claw wun a nudder some times cayso dey wuz nuthin' but human Cieetcrs attcr all, dey tako keer not tcr 'sturb do whole settlemint, ncr let ole Miss, ncr Brudder Gab'l ketch onto hit Fer Brudder Gab'l wuz dat rambunc tious, nn' dan'gus ter fool long wid dat ho mont cr had do whole endurin' lot ov 'em stannin' 'em two rows on each side ov do plantashun, lak do sheep an do goats in do good book; an' you know, honey, dat would jis cvcrla t in'lv er wo' 'cm out." "Well," said the small darkey, "why cayn't Uunk'llko nn' his old 'oman be read back'ards, too, an' turn't aloose, fo' dey minales ono a 'nuiher?" "Oh, said Uunk 1 Isam, "dese t;me ez changed fer niggers now dcys km beat on dey wives same ez white folks, nnd dere ain't no ole misster put ill fer 'em now." Detroit Free I'rcss. REQUESTED TO SKIP. IIow a Young- M. I. Ruined Ills Pro.ipectt In Dakota Town. A young physician who recently began practice in a Southeastern Dakota town was approached by the mayor of the place, whq said: "I believe you were sick a few days last week." J "Yes, I took a severe cold which was followed with fever." "That's what I heard. Now is it a fact that you sent down to Yankton and had a doctor come up to see you?" "Yes, you know 1 couldn't tell how gcvere ." "That don't make any diflcrence. Afraid to take your own medicine, hey?" "No, but I thought ." "Darsn't try what you load us up with, ch?" e "That isn't it, but- .' "No use of talking any more about it. You set up here for a good doctor with a diploma from a big school where they make 'cm, and now the first thin you do is to send for a other one to fix von tip, and all tho time you'r experiment ing on us! The best thing vou can do is to just move on before" I have you arreted for attempting to .do great bodily injury!" Esttllme (D. T.j ell. ; The Archbishop of Philadelphia has published in his diocese the decisions on the recent plenary council, of Balti more, in regard to tho sale of liquors on Sunday, and announced that all lloman Catholics under his jurisdiction must cither abstain from selling iutoxi cants on Sunday or leave thechurch. Should they d.sregard this injunction tlie priest will refuse to grant them ab solution, and thus deprive them of the sacraments. A'. Y. Times. MISCELLANEOUS. . -More than 4:.,000,030 tt , passed over tlie Brooklyn, brirt '' it was opened t) travl Union. rHi J The last revolutionary ... , died at Clarendon, N. t f1"1' eighty-four years after tho'cW vM.-Biiffalo Hxpresi. H The main building of the f leans Exposition was put ud at ! ithe other day u over hi. million Hollars, but tho hiirh 7 noivfid was .t!l.(i:,(l V n 9,. sl N j It has just been discovered tl,,,,, jcomcteries in Wayne County v r have during tin past twoyoJ, systematically robbe I. At le-utt hair or tlie bo lies interred have L Istolen. JJuffalo Express. I Colored depositors in CharW laecording to tho News and c, 'have tm,m on deposit in tiVOi! , banks, the largest S'ini belong 'J1' person being G,517, and tho gV.il; ono dollar. , "; : Ono inning of a recent cm,, .base-ball in Atlanta, Ga., preL .curious feature. Atlanta had thrit'2' !to bat. , Each ono of theni.wiWrt ' liis baso on balls, and each one thrjl out while stealing bases. Them, not a ball struck iu tho inning, nnd" every baso was filled nnd no run "' scored. A strango nrcidont happened consignment of heavy cattle 8 ,ld (j Shipment to England. Hough wua(J: was encountered on tho vovao ,,, the stanchions to which the cattle t, tied gave way, forcing the stock .to fti other side of tlm ship and caiisiii"it1 careen so mu h tout to lighten n, vessel the cattle were thrown overbojrd a loss of 1:5.000. Little John Alexander and teig. panion of Newport, Va., thmrht u 1 .. i... .: ., iimu ii'ia ui iuu Hu.ll lll It CierKWVj slept in a store. So they scrap.il ot tho door with n bit of iron, and clerk thought burglars were trying get in nnd lired his revolver, ami went through tho door and enteral Johnny s licatl, hurting lum very bad , Young girls havo taken a sudW craze for donkey carts this season, tin uoiiKey, .lor s,ino reason, bavin awakened to find himself fashionably no tiouiit greatly to his own nbm, nient. The small ponies are no lontt in demand, but in their stead tha uoiiKey is sought aucr with a persist ency that bespeaks him moro popuW than he will perhaps be when the hit purchasers become more familiar with 1ns tricks aud manners. Albany (X j.) journal. An jnuian lunerai procession Eastern Oregon is thus described: ."The t'.cfunet had been set upon i horse, nnd a stick had been lashed along cither sidd of his body to keep it in nn upright position. The head wu not supported in any way, and as the horse trotted alone: the body seemed bowing in every direction and the head shaking in a horribly grotesque man ner. The widow, dressed in her mourn ing paint, trotted along behind oni lazy mule, to which sho kept vigoroiulj applying tho whip." Tho Genesee river, in New York, f is surprising uianuiaciurers awn its banks by its increasing volumej o? water from year to year. Somo ruin ago, in common with other stream tn the State, the water diminished an tho mills and factories that had dv pended on its power were obliged tt use steam. The Rochester Demxrti says that mills who have not iised their wheels for years are getting back to them, much to their financial advan tage. No explanation is given tor this coiuiuion ot tue river. i Ba'l-players in Pittsburgh are tail ing about tho smart young catcher ol an amateur club, who was rcmarkabto for catching batsmen out on foul tip! even wh n the bat didn't seem to strike within three or four inches of tho ball An investigation revealed that the catcher hud a gum band attached to his glove, nnd when ho' des'red to foul out a man ho would raiso the band with ono finger, and when the ball passed under the bat released it, Tho band would snap against tho glove nnd all within hearing would hear a suppossd foul tip. r.i.iburjh Foai. Frederick Barkman. of Wilming ton, Del., owns a dog. Recently while this canine was busily scratchingout something from the ground Mr. Bark man thought it would bo a g wdjoke to crawl up behind, give a snarling l ark nnd suddenly grab the industriom animal by ono of his hind legs. Mr. B.ukman did so. Quick ns thought the dog turned nnd grabbed his jocular master by the proboscis, making hi! teeth meet through that prominent feature before ho saw his mistake. Mr. Barkman sensibly acquitted the dog of all blame and did not punish hiin. A'. Y. Tribure. THE WHITE HOUSE. I What Its Maintenance Costs the Country In Connection with the 1'reHldcnt. Most people believe that the $50,000 a year which tlie Fresident gets as his salary is the sum total. This is a mis take. The estimate of the amount which Congress is to appropriate this year lies beforo us, open at tho page relating to the President We seo that $36,084 is asked for him, in addition to his salary of SoO.OoO. to nai the s and clerks, . .. j xj . nig auuuiuiuabl.o aiiu v.-. His private secretary is paid $3,250, his assistant nrivnto annritarv 2j0. v.v,.v.....i7 his stenographer $1,800, five messen gers each $1,200, asteward, $1,800, two door-keepers who each gi t $1,200. four other clerks at good salaries, one tele graph operator, two ushers getting 1.200 and $1,400, a night usher getting $1,200, a watchman who gets $900, and a man to take care of fires who receives $864 a year. In addition to this ther is set down $8,000 for incidental ex penses, such as stationery, carpets and the care of the President's stables. And further on, under another heading, there is a demand for nearly $40.0u0 more. Of this $12,500 is for repairs and furnishing the White House, $-50i) for fuel, $3,000 is for the green house, and $15,000 is for gas, matches and the stables. Tho White House, all told, costs the country, in connection with tho President, considerably over $123. 000 a year. San Fran.ico World.