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About The Eugene City guard. (Eugene City, Or.) 1870-1899 | View Entire Issue (May 2, 1885)
DUDES UNFASHIONABLE. to lie Succeeded by Ouletly-Ureeeed Men of MUtely Mien. "The dudo? The dudo in N. G. lie has gone out of fashion," said a fashion ablo tailor on Saturday. "Tho correct young man this winter will be stately, intellectual-looking and quietly dressed. We are golug to approach somewhat to the elegance of manner and apparel of the old school. The dude really re mained In vogue- longer than any other typo that 1 have dressed during my ex perience with wonted and tweeds. ascrilie tlmt to the fact that tho ladies really doted on him. Young men used to come to my establishment weary of the old Inane type, but they hesitated to abandon it, because they were afraid of losing tho admiration of the ladies. But I tell you some of my dudo custom crs were great as owners of clothes." "For cxamploP" "Well, I mado one of them thirteen overcoats and two ulsters in one season, Ho had his head full of something he called harmony of color and circum stauccs. Mo used to wear certain col org on dark days and other colors when tho sun shone. Then he was alwavs very particular that his overcoat should harmonize with the color of his trousers and coat Ho thought it absolutely noccssary, too, to wear an overcoat of a certain color when he went out to dinner and ono of a different color when ho simply mado a call. True, ho took oil the coat when he reached Irs destination, but all the same he had the notion lhat a certain color ought to go with a particular ooensbn. That was ono of tho things he called the har mony of circumstances. Another cu tomer of mino, the son of a man who had mado millions and millions during tho war, told mo that ho had ii'-'O suits. J. wo rooms In his lather s house were nsod solely as store-rooms for his dry goods. All tho same ho had no moro idea 01 what good dressing was than a Hottentot His dad seemed to mo to always wear tlx) same old-fashioned suit, but looked at heart like a man with a level head. my nest-urosied customer was a young man who never got more than three suits a year and was not fool enough to pay top-notch prices, either. He had tho eye nnd tasto of a gentle man. Besides that, he had a g.'tiius for combination. He could make ln.t year's trousers go with this year's coat In a way that made the arrangement appear as II it ought to be the fashion if It really were not. Ho didn't have much money, but ho went in a swell set, and thero was not ono of the i-ons of millionaires with whom he associated that could come within a block of him as a well-dressed man. It Is the taste either of tho customer or of the tailor that must toll. Any experienced tailor, If ho Is allowed to have his own way, will make up for tho want of taste in a customer and make his patron look at least presentable. Madly-dressed men have only tliom-olvos to blame. They haven't tho first Idea of taste, hut they, nevertheless, insist on having their own ideas. In such a caso it Is the business of tho tailor to obey orders, even if ho knows his customer will look like a fool. If you havo any doubt as to your own ability to choose "that which will be ut onoo fashionable and handsome, leave everything to the tailor. He will turn out tho proper thing. "-Baltimore Jkrald. CHEAP DOCTORS. London I'liyaldnna Who Mk Their Vlalt for Uuerter. As in America, so In Kngland, con sulting physicians mako tho most money, although their fees will appear tiii nil as compared with those of such men as Dr. Hamilton ami Dr. Shrady, of New York, and Dr. Agnew, of Phila delphia. Tho Usual fuj of a consulting nhysielau In London Is calculated by the mileage covered in visiting n pa tent. One guinea per mile Is the charge paid, but, of course, when a man of tho standing of Clarke, Kerrier, t'ritchett or Humes attends a consulta tion In tho country, the fee is enor mous, as any of those men would not probably bo away from Ixuidon for Iwontv-four hours for less than $'U Tho foe of any ordinary practitioner for visiting a patient at his or her residence may he set down at live shillings. 1 ho semi-fashloiiahlo physician's fee will bo double that amount, while the shining light of the profession will not visit a patient under two guineas, though they will treat one at their otlico for half that Mini. Thero are hundreds of doe tor in London, however, who will pay ' a visit to tlie hoioo and prescribe for the patient for half a crown, and mira bile dictu, thero are scores of fully qualified and able medicine men in London who will pay throe visits to a sick person and provide him with med icine for tho absurdly small sum of fifty cents. By tills It will bo seen that competi tion is as keen here amongst members of the medical profession as it is amongst business tucu and thopkecp crs. Iho cheap doctors 1 havo spoken of keep dispensaries, chemist shops, In fact, and hero they attend for several hours daily and see persons three times a week, (hiding all medicine, for the bagatelle of twenty-five cents. I am aware that this statement must sccra preposterous to American reader, but I ran vouch for the truth of It. I firmly believe, top, that many of these doctors are far more successful in the treatment of diseases than their more exper'encod brethren. These men see diseases of every variety and In every stage, and In a single day treat as many persons as their high-timed brethren atteud in the course of a month. To my mind, then, it stands to reason that these doctors are likely to be more successful than their orthodox brethren, as surelv as ex HTienoe in the study of medicine, as in all other kindred matters, must prove of greater value than mere reading and theorizing. London Cor. St. Louis !' publican. m m The children of London publlo schools are surely coming to a happier estate. The philanthropists who be lieve them to be suffering from over pressure on the part of the teachers are quarreling with the philanthropic who believe them to be suffering from tinder feeding on the part of their pureuts. The result Is likely to be that they will obtain more f oJ at home and be gheu lea to do at school- Current. ENGLISH COURTS. Uow They Were Conducted Half Cent ury Ago. Among the Judges and front bench of counsel thero was a grim priggish' nc.s calculated to strike terror in the hearts of juniors. The number of Queen's Counsel was comparatively limited. Serjeants possessed the mo nopoly of thj Common Pleas, and proper attention to the process of eat ing beof and mutton, with the occasion al addition of apple pie, qualified the student to take upon hira-cii the re sponsibilities of tho bar. Competitive examinations existed only In the womb of time, yet tho students, who nowa days would be considered seml-educat cd lads, had furnished through past centurlos a line of accomplished Judges, splondid advocates, and a sys tem of judicature certainly surpassing that of any other Kuropcan country. It may be doubted whether, if tho present restrictions had been in force, the pub lic and tho profession might not have lost tho services of such men as Krskine, Wildo and Thesiger, with others who, wishing to join the profession at a com paratively late period of life, had .neither time nor disposition to plod through tho studies of boyhood. Legal .habits were earlier in the morning and later at night The courts commenced at nine, and consultations were, I may say, almost Invariably conducted at the chambers of leaders in the evening, and sometimes continued until a late hour, I remember being at a late consul tation witn Mr. Serjeant wildo up to twelvo o'clock at night Sir Fred erick 1'olloek told mo that durin tho terms and the sittings, summer and winter, he reached his chambers at live o'clock In the morning, lighted his own lire when necessary. At the Uld liaili the sittings continued from nine in the morning until nino at night. Tho Judges upon circuit, during a heavy assize, sat until very lute; and ono can scarcely wonder at tho cxhaustod jur iry Ur. men, who, during tho address of Al Crowder, ono of the most amiable but certainly not liveliest of men, lapsed in to a sleep which displayed itself in notes somewhat antagonistic to tho elo quence of counsel, and, when awnk ened and sternly rebuked by tho Judgo, is reported to have said plaintively, "Well, my Lord, 1 havo stood as much frowdcring' as any one!" And it must bo admitted that at this period the Western Circuit, notwithstanding the occasional Hashes with which tho futuro Chief-Justice enlivened its pro ceedings, was, It distinguished by Its law, equally so ny the ponderosity with which certain of its advocates dovcloivd It Serjeant lioinpas has lost Ills name and Is only remembered as Serjeant iiuzfuz, in Dickens s famous trial for breach of promise. I havo heard him upon two or throe occasions an earnest advocate, with a stylo certainly not lively, no had a large business on circuit Serjeant Batlanline, in Tern pie liar. HUSBANDS. Ron They Nhnuld lie Cooked to Make Thru Tender and flood. Miss Corson said at tho Baltimore Cooking School that a Baltimore lady had written a rocipo for "cooking hus bands so as to mako them tender and good." It is as follows: "A good many husbands are utterly spoiled by m:s management Some women go about li as It their husbands were bladders. and blow them up. Others keep them constantly in not water; others let them freeze by tlioirearolessnoss mid indiftor- cnee. Nuno keep them in a stew by Irritating ways and words. Others roast them. Some keep them In pickle all their lives. It can not ba supposed that any husband will be tender nnd good managed in this way, but they aro realty delicious when properly treated. In selecting your husband you should not bo guided by the silvery appear ance, as in buying mackerel, nor by the goidon tint, as it you wanted salmon, lie sure to select him yourself, as tastes differ. Do not go to market for him, as tho best are always brought to your door, it is tar better to have none un less you will patiently learn how to cook him. A preserving kettle of tho II nest porcelain is best, but if you havo noth ing but an earthenware pipkin, it will do with care. Soo that the linen in which you wrap him Is nicely washed and mended, with the re quired number of buttons and strings nicely sewed on. Tie him In tho kettle by a strong silk cord called comfort, as the one called duty is apt to be weak. They are apt to lly out of the kettle and be burned and crusty on tho edges, since liko crabs and lobsters, you have to cK)k them while alive. Make a clenr, steady tiro out of love, neatness and cheerfulness. Set him as near this as seems to agree with him. If ho sputters npd fizzes, do not be anxious; somo husbands do this till they are utiito done. Add a little sugar in the form or what confectioners call kisses, but no vinegar or pepper on any account. A little spice improves them, but it must bo used with judgment. Do not stick any sharp instrument into him to see if lie is becoming tender. Stir him gently, watch tho while lest ho lie too uat aud close to tho kettle and so become useless. You can not fail to know when he is done. If thus treated you will tind him very digestible, agree ing nicely with yon and the children, and he will keep. as long as you want, unless you become careless and set him In too cold a place." Bnltitnort Anurican i At an cxeiso suit tried recently In a Justice's Court in l ister County, N. Y., a Newburgh brewer swore that he could drink sixty glasses of lager in a day and an evening and still Do "perfectly sober." Anot her citizen swore that he could "take twenty whiskies straight day in and day out, and feel all right." Ono of the jurors said he was of tho opinion that when a man put his um brella to bed and then Mood all night in tho umbrella rack in the hallway, he was not sober. v J. smn. Hira Bates and wifo. of South Hanover, Conn., are over eighty-eight years old, and, what is an uneoraruon coiucldence, were born on the same day, August 5, 171HS. within a few hours of each other. Harry's history of Hanover says that they were married February S4, Hartford CouranL A CAT DONATION PARTY. The Experience of IWt-Tormeoted Fm lly In Montf ornery County. An. incident occurred a few miles from Norrlstown the other day, within Montgomery County, which fairly ri valed In ludicrousness the Imaginary experiences of Max Adder's Censho hockeu married couple who celebrated their iron wedding, and whose friend presented them with two hundred and lifty pairs of Hat-irons which had been bought at the liquidating sale of a foun dry's stick. Tho materfaniilias, who may be des ignated as Mrs. Smith, is a garrulous, good-natured lady, who retails her tri als to all sympathizing visitors. Her principal gr.evance lately has been the rapaciousness of a colony of rats that tool possession of the house. Figura tively speaking, the family have hud rats for breakfast, rats for dinner, rats for supper and rats for a nig'ut-cap at bed-time. All hor friends and she has many ha 1 heard about her rat troubles when she g.ivo a dinner-party. About twenty p oplo were invited. The first arrival yo'. out of a carriage and also took out a bag. "My dear Mrs. Smith, how do you do? You aro much troubled with rats, and sd anxious for a good cat, that I thought I would bringyou a couple of cats. Here they are, and the bag be ing o;ened n Tom and a Tabby leaped fort'i mid ran around the yard. The second guest I. rough t a cat. The third l.rought a couple of eats." The fourth brought a very young kitten. Tho lifth brought a new family of kit tens. The sixth brought a bag full of buck-alley cats from Philadelphia, whose nppetites, accustomed to fat sewer-rats, might bo expected to result in the annihilation of scrawny little country rats in almost no time. The seventh guest brought two quiet old tire' sido cats. Tho eighth brought a beau tiful Maltese. In short every ono of the twenty guests brought at least ono cat and generally several. Tho ho-t and hostess began to look dubious when the tenth truest arrived. On the fifteenth arrival they began to wonder which would eat most, the guests or tho cats. On tho nineteenth they meditated killing some of the cats to fee I the other cats. On the twentieth arrival tliey felt like putting somo r.it poison into tho food of the guests. Persons in want of cats can Iuquiro of anybody in that part of the country. bornslown llvrald. "GRANDFATHER'S CLOCK." Why It Is Superior m a Time-Keeper to Modern Time Pieces. If it were not for wlint may bo desig nated as meteorological changes, the problem of the accurate measurement of timo would bo solved if we had heavy pendulum driven uniformly over a small arc. lint here aro two "ifs. Wo will take tho second of them lirst, as it Is more easily disposed of. Pos minting at the outset machinery in the train very nicely exocuted, and with jeweled bearings so that it will act uni formly, or with the least possible vari ation, we have before us the question of propelling It uniformly. That the best power for a clock is wolght, is be yond dispute. Tho Invention of tho co:l-spriug camo near annihilating tho race of good common clocks, "brand' father's clock," with its wooden wheels and other crudities, is still tho superior oi tno grandson s ciock as a tunc keeper, for "grandfather's clock" had the great advantago of a uniform power suiucionc and just stillicicnt to projicl tho clock when it was properly cleaned and oiled! Tho grandson s clock has a coded-spring as a motive-power, hav- ing, when it is tightly wound, not less than thrco times tho amount of power required to drive tho clock, nnd dimin islung In amount, thereby altering the rato of tho clock with each successive hour. The grandson's clock will march on, oiled or unoiled (and therefore usu ally unoiled), until it comes to a prem nture end as complete ns that of tho "ono-noss shay. Iho "grandfather s clock," on tho other hand, which de clined to go unless Its rations of oil were doled out to it onca in n year or less by the peripatetic tinker, is good for another century, since its bearing have been saved from cutting them selves away from lack of oil. Iho kitchen-clock of to-day can only be miuLi to keep respectable timo by so regulating it that tho gain it makes when tightly wound shall bo onset by tho loss as it runs down. Theodore B. Wilson, in Popular Science Monthly. WILDCATS. Commodity Which Hid Not Fin I liemly Hnle In ritUburgh, A rugged representation of Westmore land County, named Lcighton, chilled the blood of a small party of gentlemen yesterday by sidling up to where they were standing on Smithtield street, and calmly inquiring if they wanted to pur chase a pair of wildcats. " ildcats!' remarked the gentlemen In choru as they fell back with a vague' fear that the Westmoreland man might have the animals concealed under his overcoat "Yes, wildcats," replied the stranger, "and they're jiin dandies, too, you Kin jest let on that I caught 'cm up in the foot hills las' week. They're up at Blairsvillo now. The male is' the finest one 1 ever seen in my life. He weighs twenty-three pounds, nnd is the fiercest cat iu the State. Whew! but he's a sassv critter." "How did you catch them?" asked a number of the party. "Tracked 'em into a big holler pine tree and chloroformed 'em. Wal, sir, they was the most astonished animals you ever looked at when they found themselves in a cago, my meat" "Aro wildcat phuliful up your way?" "Wal. ye, thar's quite a number of 'em. I had a tame one once. Ho was a great pet You could hold a pieeo of meat up for him twenty-two f-et away and he'd sail right over and grab it at one jump." The Westmoreland Nimrol made quito an effort to sell the animals for forty dollars, and seemed to regard hi street acquaintances as deficient in a proper appreciation of the beautiful when hu offer was declined -Ml-burgh IHtpatck. THE COPTIC CHURCH. Interacting- Description of Religions Or- gultlon Flourishing lu Egypt. The supreme head of the Coptio Church is the Fatriarch of Alexandria, who, however, lives at Cairo. Ho claims direct apostolic succession from S . Mark, the founder of tho Egyptian Church, who is claimed as having been the first patriarch, and who is held in the same reverence as is accorded by the Western Church to St Peter, The other Coptio ecclesiastical orders aro bishops,, arch-priests, priests, oca cjiis and monks. The priests are all expected to marry, but the patriarch must bo a celibate. Ha is Invariably chosen, either by his predecessor or else by lot, from among the monks of the convent of St Anthony. There are twelve Coptic bNhops, and the patriarch nominates the Metropolitan of Abys sinia. Though the Copts are remarkable for their general detestation of all other Christian sects, their principal tenets assimilate with those of the Latin Church. They acknowledge seven sac raments, enjoin auricular confession and extreme unction. Tho latter is ad ministered not only to persons at the point of death, but to person who have done meet penanco after thd co:ninis sioii of grievous sin. Evil spirits aro exorcised "with candlo, with book nnd .wit'i bell." In celebrating the Holy Eucharist leavened bread is used, which has previously been dipped in wine, The Copts are moro r goroUs in their observance oi last tiays. nosiues every Wednesday and Friday in the year tho Lenten fa"t is prolonged to fifty-five davs, during which no manner of am mal food is allowed not even eggs, milk orclueso. Somo rit's, however, appear t bo borrowed either from their Moslem or Jewish neig ibor. Thus cireumcis on is deemed essent'al, in ad dition to baptism by immersion. The frequent services of the Coptic Church are conducted in modern Ct n ic, that is to say, in Greek Coptic, which, a'thougn not spoken by the monk, is understood by them all. Hut the true Coptic, the language of the Pharoahs, is literally a dead tongue. rather Vansteb, who visited siout in 17G;l, states that ho then) had tho priv ilege of seeing tho Inst Copt who understood his own language, and with whom it was to d o. Being eighty years old, and very deaf, he was not ablo to give his' visitor much useful informa tion. Some portions oi tno service such us the do.-pel, nre first ro id in Coptic nnd then explained in Arabic, in order that it might bo understood by tho people. Naturally, tho lives of tho saints oc cupy a largo place in Coptio literature, aud the place of highest honor, next to the Ulessed Virgin and St Mark, is ac corded to St George whether to tho real St. George, England's patron saint, or to that evil Ueorge, also born in Cappadocia, who headed tho Arian heresy iu Alexandria, and from time to time superseded St Athanasius, is not clear. Which of tho two is revered by tho Copt I can not say. lint I know we wore much interested whon visiting a very ancrent Greek Church in Cairo, dedicated to St George, by watcli ng a sisterhood of Latin nuns who, like our selves, were doing a little sight-seeing. Tho kind old priest did tho honors of tlui tiiimt tvlth ohnrminn. OMin-tnuv nvnn pioduclng his veritable tiead for inspeo tion. Harper s isaznr. STRONG AT EIGHTY. David Dudley Field's Recipe PreiervtIon. for Silf- "My recipo for self-preservation is ex ercise. 1 am a lirm believer lit exercise, I will tell you my mode of life. I am a very temperate man, and have always been so. I havo taken caro of myself, and a I have a good constitution I sup pose that is the reason I am so well. You must nsk the Almighty why I have lived so long, nnd how long I shall live. I am perfectly healthy nud strong, and, though 1 have nominally retired from tho law, I am busy a you seo from morning until night Another reason 1 am so well is that my mind has always beeii occup.ed. t am nevei idle; in fact I havo no time to bo ill. "When I was a young man I had very sovero headaches. in 1846 1 bought a horse, and I havo not had a headache since. Every morning I arise at six o'clock. I have done so for forty years. Itako an ice-cold bath, dress myself, jump on a horso at seven o'clock, and ride for an hour. I then breakfast and work at niv house until eleven o'clock, when I walk down-town, a distanco of four miles. I remain at my otlico until three o'clock, then walk home, and dine at six. At seven I sleep for half an hour, after which I am ready for anything. I retire between ten and eleven o'clock. I have dono this for over forty years. I attribute my hardihood to horseback-riding. Have I ever taken a drink? No, sir, never, except a glass of claret at dln nor. Liko Pere Hyncinthe, I must have my claret at dinner. Whisky, brandy, or any liquid of that kind I never touch. "My advice to young men Is to get eight hours sloep every night and nnk only chocolate, coffee and tea. The young men of to-dny aro too fast The candle can not burn at both ends and last long. I have never smoked tobacco in any shape and neer wilL Do as I have dono, and you will be strong at eighty, and probably at ninety. Air. t leld was at his office busy with some details of his civil code, now be fore the Legislature. "The code," he said, "is favored by a great number of lawyers. There are some old fellows, to be sun', who are opposed to It What they want is a large library. They seem to think that a civil code is an alteration of existing things. Hy no means; it is a condensation, and is cal culated to save much labor and re search. These old lawyers have learned the law in ono wav, and they believe in a civil code about as much a a Moham medan believes in Christianity." X. 1'. lommerctiU Ativtnuer. Mr. Seth Green, the authority on all questions of pisciculture, has taken the ditonal chair of The Ameru-an Analr, published in this city. A". Y. Independ ent. MOW HlTMANAUtL) II. TKin nrooklrn Man nnd Chtcage Millionaire' Well, how many of the people in this mntrnnolis axs worthy only so far as a mere veneer makes them so? Here is nra tnlnrn.tin(r trUB storV. and I am sorry to bo obl'ged to omit the names. There lived iii a Brooklyn boarding- house a gentleman, his wifo and their pretty daughter. He was a salesman in a IWdwav drv good house, and his salary was $3,000 a year. Ho had saved in ism in the nnurse of thirtv years of hard work. Last summer the wife and daughter went to Dridgehampton, Long Island, for a little recreation, and there . .. fMni fhinafri wlin met a young mnu u" .i.w, instantly fell completely In love with the young woman, lie seemeu w uc d the father was sent for to nnmn down nnd look him over. The man of business ascertained in naif an 1 I l L 1 .... n .1 ji. r a .1 tl ,nn ff uour iuai me juiiiis,1u a rii.h mnrphnnt. who was rated among the millions by the commercial agencies. Indeed, tlie Chicago ruercnani ana nis wife were at that moment in Uridge- hampton. Tho Brooklyn man formu lated a scheme and hurried to Brook Ivn tn nut if into evecntion. In that city nf nliurehes there are to let full appointed mansions, in which aro not only furni ture, but bedding, tamo-ware, suver service, china, lace curtains, piano and library. The best of them come high, to be sure, but they are exceedingly sump tuous, and to live in them is to enjoy life as thonirh vou owned them. Our Broadway salesman at $3,000 a year hired one of these elegantly furnished houses for six months, paid two months' rout in Hilvnnen. moved in and sent word to his wife and daughter to invite tlie Chicago folks home with them. The Chicago folks accepted and came along. . 1 Tl They found their ncw-mauo crooKiyn acquaintances living in one of Brooklyn's finest dwellings. The practiced eye of (he Chicago merchant saw that it must require an income of nt least $15,000 a year to even live in such a house more 111-..!. U ...... .1.1 IrtllMa ft, lit. filini. The Brooklyn man evidently was very rich, and Ins daughter was aotiDticss well worthy to be the wifo of his son. Tho bov pressed his suit. Ho was asked to come ogain in a few weeks nnd get his answer. He did so, and was ac cepted. The girl could not then be married too soon, and December was named. Accordingly, just before tho kolidays there was a grand wedding in tho mansion. Thero was a big handful of Chicago guests who congratulated tho young man from Chicago on his good luck in getting so pretty a bride, and one apparently wun sucu weu-io-uo mirmtt,! It triN u vnrv flilfni.aflll U'flil. ding, and tho brido is" very happy pre sumably in her Chicago home; but tho Brooklyn man's leaso of the mansion ran out on tlie loth of this month, and ln is now leu k in the hnnrdino'-hntise. and still selling goods in the Broadway house at $.1,000 a year. Almost all of tho $10,000 ho had saved is gone, too. But he has married his daughter to the - Q son of a millionaire, nnd she has prom ised to i a kc careoi nun. iv. i. uorre ipomlcnce I'tica Observer. AFFECTATION. An Artlllrlnt 2trb Assumed by Thoe Who Make I'reteiisluns to Quulltlei They lo Not Posses. This evil propensity, for such we un hesitatingly designate it, has, alas! a deep nnd wide-spreading influence. From tho sublime subject of religion down to the slightest punctilio of de portment, what is there in any way noble, "lovely, or of good report," that affectation is not impudent enough to counterfeit? But happily for the inter ests of simplicity nnd truth, the counter feit is us different from the reality as the onltrv tinsel from the uure and solid gold, and though the ono may glitter nnd dazzle for awhile, yet the other will only stand the test of time and trial. Tho triumph of hypocrisy is short, and even when at its highest glory tho flimsy disguise reveals moro than it con ceals. But this is a fact of which those who wear the mask are probably not cognizant; for had they the power "to see themselves as others sco them," they would cast the disguise aside. This idea is eminently suggestive of tho source from which affectation springs, namely, a heart that has never been sub jected to the scrutinizing process of self-examination. Hence we shall find that an affected person is invariably a self-ignorant person, and ono who pos sesses a mean mind. Philadelphia Call. An Imitative Cat. William Ewing, of Concmaugh, is a highly respected gentleman of sixty years of age and is a member in good standing of the Disciples' Church. The necessity for these statements will ap pear right away. In Mr. Ewing's house were two clocks, one down-stairs and the other up, which had not moved for two years. A tinker was recently called in to repair tho down-stairs clock. While he was at work Mr. Ewing's cat a very intelligent animal, jumped upon the table on which the clock stood and closely watched all that was done. After the clock had been fixed and made to strike again the cat disap peared. Some time later the clock up stairs wivs heard to strike. The mem bers of the family, in great surprise, hastened np stairs and were astonished to find that the cat had opened tho clock door and, by inserting its paws among its works, hail actually over come the obstacle to its running. They stood and watched it and saw it strike the pendulum with one of its front paws, just as the tinker had done with the down-stairs clock. The cat did not set the hands, for the reason, perhaps, that it did not know the precise time. Johnstown (Pa.) Tribune. It has been discovered by a Dutch scientist that the gum which collects on the branches of certain trees especially the cherry, peach, plum and others bearing stone fruit is due to disease of the tree. The disease is produced by a highly organized fungus, whose action causes the formation of gum, and it is quickly reproduced in sound trees when they are inoculated with pieces of the gum containing any of the fungus. PERSONAL AND LITERARY. ( It is a peculiarity of all French! eyening newspapers that they aro dated! the following morning. j Kufus J. Childress, a poet and' magazine writer, and a well-known resident of Louisville, Ky., has become' insane. Novels constitute nine-tenths of tha, books read in England, and nineteen-! twentieths of the books read in the wholo world. ( - The London nowspapers have a curious etiquette forbidding one to either quote or comment upon anything that appears in the columns of another.. -The London Stand trd declares that, the opinion steadily grows that Nathan iel Hawthcrno was the most consider-1 ablo literary personage that America has yet produced. Rufus Choate, when somebody threatened to challenge his vote on the, ground that he could not write, an-' swered: "If you do I will give you a specimen of my handwriting, and chal lenge you on the ground that you can! not read." X. Y. Commercial-Advertiser. Mr. Sarony, tho New York pho tographer, although over sixty years of, age, rich and very fond of sketching in charcoal and chalks for the Tile and Salmagundi Clubs, of which lie is a membir, still attends personally to posing the sitters in his great establish ment M Y. Post. The now book, "The Money., makers," which is said to be a reply V, "The Bread-winners," has just been: published, and it has been generally understood that Congressman Martini A. Foran, of Cleveland, is the author;, but that gentleman denies the report,' and there promises to bo the same mystery about the book as there was about "Tho Bread-winners "Chicago Inter Ocean. The late David Kimball, of Ports mouth, N. IL, had on several occasions1 during his lifetime the rare experience; of seeing tinder the roof-tree of the old house atTopsfield, Mass., seven gene-: rations of his own blood, namely, hisi own great-grandfather, grandfather,; father, mother, his own generation, his own and his brother's children and grandchildren, and his brother's groat, grandchildren. Boston Journal. Policeman Richard L. Eldrodge, ofj NewYoik, has boon retired from tho, forco and will hereafter receive a pen sion of fifty dollars per month. El dredgo has been iu coutinuous service for fifty-two years, and is now eighty seven years old. IIo was ono of the four men who stood guard at Castle Garden when General Lafayetto was re ceived by the citizens of New York, and was tho officer called by the mob nfter the murder of Helen Jewett many years ago. It was he w'jo found the hatchet with which tho murder was committed and tho cloak of tho murderer. X. Y. Sun. HUMOROUS. The priucipal seasons illustrated at the roller-skating rink are "fall" and' "spring." Some of the remarks they provoke are summery. Xorristown Herald, "This bed is too short," said the tall man, on being shown to his room. "You must remember," said the boy, "that when you are in there will te two feet added to it" Merchant Trav eler. "Joseph Marmaduke Mullally, how dare you, sir!" exclaimed the indig nant mother of a St Louis boy. "Tako your sister's ear muff off your feet in-, stantcr and find your rubbers. Don't bo so lazy.sir!" Pittsburgh Chronicle- Tele graph. "Look, here, this . piece of meat don't suit me. It's from the back of the animal's neck," said a man to a German butcher. "Mine fricn', all dot Beef vat I sells is pack of dot neck, ere vos nodding but horns in front of dot neck." X. 1". Independent. Do you manufacture trucks aa well as roller skates?" "Oh, no." "But I was down at your factory this morning and saw several put together." "Oh, those were not trucks." "No!" "No, they are the kind of skates wo aro shipping to Chicago." Boston Post. S you didn t succeed very well. with your school in Illinois?" "No;l I had to give it up at tho end of tho first month." "Did you use the black-; board much?" "No; it was too large.; But I used all the other furniture about; the room that wasn't nailed down." V. Y. Graphic. "Bill" Nvo invites tM Prineo of Wales' son, wuo has just come of age, to be his guest when he visits this coun try. "1 tender you," he writes, "tho freedom of my double-barreled shotgun' during the prairie-chicken holocaust. I know where the angleworm grows rankest and the wild hen hatches her young." "Aunt Jane, is it quite true that a lady may ask a gentleman to marry her if it is leap year.' "les, my dear.. it is quite true. ' "But if he don't want to marry her, Aunt Jane, what must he do then?" "He must give her a new black silk dress, my dear, and then sh understands." "Oh! Aunt Jane! Aunt Jane! Now I know why you have sO ..i il 1 1 j ..uua .... at mount. "Mary, what does this mean? I find a bill for the use of hose." "Sure,; marm, a man called to know if you used hose. I told him you did and ho left that bill." "Why did you tell him we used hose, Mary? We never do." Mary's face showed surprise, distrust and reproach: "Why. we do, marm!" -with vehemence. "Hose? Mary, we haven't any." "Why, m-a-rm! What does Pat take up the weeds with?" Boston Transcript, Barnacle was forty-two rears of age yesterday. His wife presented him with a handome pair of carpet slippers cost fifty cents. Barnaclo was grateful but thoughtful. At last he exclaimed:. "Times have changed!" "Why. dear?" asked Mrs. B. "Well, before we were married, you gave me slippers worked in floss and silk, embroidered, mono gramraed, scalloped in morocco and patent-leather with wool soles, at a cost of wveral dollars ah, times change!" "Well John, replied Mrs. slippers charged to you. I thought you ouiun ( want to pay for a costly pair. Proridenu Xews.