TRICKS OF MEMORY.
Every Otber Saturday.
IIow li it, growing old, that what we'r been
In earliest day should cling to memory
When all the Interval of lift between,
Compared to that, seems easy to forgot!
How life, in which we're fought aud fagged
and striven
Looked back upon, ihould be but empty
noma,
U'klL If Ilk. k. kin. tr... n
Bland out tbe day wben we were girl and
Doyj
A SLIGHT MISTAKE.
What rale Hid for Yaane Haa la
a Inlelllgeave Oilier.
Detroit Free Pros.
A young lady wont into an in
telligeuoe uiuoe the other day, and, a
thore wag no girl in at the time, sat
down to wait for one Khe la a Jeffor
son avenue belle aud leads the cay pro-
cession in society circle ; she ia also a
good daughter and model housekeeper,
taking all the care of a large establish'
meat off hor mother' ageing shoulders
As alia Hat and waited in tho intolli
eonee office a gentleman whom she
knew came into get a girl; alio had
met htm at asocial reception a few
niguta previous, tie in lull evening
dress, she in a oostumo of pink silk and
hnnnialt lace, with rose in hor hair,
lie had whispered sweet words of ad
miration to lior, and alio had blushed
beneath his too ardent gaze. It Was
only a rehearsal of that foolish, old
play, "Love's Young Dream," but it
Lad left pleasant memories with both.
She could not help showing she was
glad to moot him again, and hall roso.
But ho passed her to speak to the
woman at tho dusk, who supplied
"liolp'' to domestic Macedonia.
'til j brothers f tinily is in noad of a
girl, Mrs. . Can you send one up
there to-day ?"
"No, sur," said tho woman stolidly,
"tha' an't ono in now."
"Why won't this one do?" askod the
gontloman curtlv, turning upon tho
young lady, who in her plain walking
drosi and veiled turban sat trembling
with apprehension.
"La, now, she ain't no girl," said the
mistress of tho intelligence, but the
customer paid no attention to her.
"fcjoe hero, Mis or Mrs. what's your
namo," he askod abruptly, "can you do
general - housework, wash, iron and
oook ? If you can and are worth your
salt, you can got a place d'ye hour ?"
The girl shrunk hastily from his ex
tended hand, and he asked :
"Are you a Gorman or Swodo? IV
cause if you can't speak Kuirlish, we
don't want you. What's tho mutter
with vou? Ain't duaf ami dumb, are
you?1'
By this time tho indignant girl had
collected her wits, and, rising from her
chair, slio walked out, leaving him star
ing utter her.
"She will meet and alia will mini him,
There will he ouj vacant ..are."
Hut ho will never know what futo did
for him in the intelligence ollioe.
lirutallty to the laaane.
(Exchange,
At tho regular bi-monthly meeting of
tho Society for Promoting the Welfare
of the Insane, iu New York, a paper
written by Miss Mary ISrighum was
1 1. I ' I I . .....
rcau in wincu sou sum: ki uu dis
eases, the most mysterious, tho most
intricate and dillicult to treat, ami at
tho suinii time which shows an alarming
increase nmoug nil classes, is insanity.
It demands mm must receive that merit
more iu accord with tho, laws of hit'
mauity than has been accorded it, The
history of insane asylums has been for
ages one long ghastly chapter of nihil
inanity aud sickening brutality, ami
every investigation inado within the
ast decade, when honestly conducted,
i as rovo.ilod a statu of all'uirs, especially
in tho a mums of this count ry, which i
a disgraco to our boasted . Christian
civilization.
"Modicul scieneo tells us that all the
implements of torture the chains,
irous and rings aro done away with.
But what has taken their place? Are
not the straps, the cords the mull's
the blinded rooms, the chairs, the cribt
in daily uso iu our asylums? lo not
the insane suffer from tin old spirit of
tyranny and neglect? Do they not
hear tho contemptuous word, tho
cruel taunt, the iustiliinj and evnsivo
replies to civil questions? Jo not pa
tients experience the ignorance of doc
tors and the neglect and abuse of at
tendants? lo not blows with tho flit,
with sirans or with keys form the daily
part of th i unprotected life of many pa
tients iu our asylums whi are reason
able enough and seimblo enough to feel
the cruelty of it all? It was a treat
ment of punis imenU then; it is a treat
ment of punishments to-day. Tho sys
tem uiiil.'r which these asylums are
goveruinl is u system that makes but
never cures; a treatment contrary to
science aud counuou souse, aud is an
outrage on common decency and com
mon humanity, and the patients hr-vo uo
iirotaction from physicians who do not
mow a sane from au insane person ; no
Iirotcction from cruelty, abuse and neg
oct." At the conclusion of tho paper Mrs.
M. Kug uiia Berry, tho Booretary, ex
plained tout Miss lirigham had been
confined iu nn asylum, ami that upon
her release her ropiesontatiuns to tho
authorities of Massachusetts had been
made tho subject of an oitlcial iuvrstiga
lion.
It Dwarr All F.lae.
I Prof. Swing.)
To have all the gatoj of the bjuso
suddenly closed, to hear no lougor tho
call of friend, to be oblivion to the
city's street aud to day aud night, to cease
to be a mail and to become a palo mar
ble form in a eollu, this is the amazing
pecUolo of our world. The seven
wonder are as nothing compared with
this ono marvel. It duurfs all olso.
Brooklyn Fag'.e: "It ever I marry I
shan't seek for uiiud mind's too cold.
Ill choose an emotional womau."
"Don't do if," eagerly exclaimed his
bald beaded friend, "don't do it, I iiu
plore you. My wifo's an emotional
woman.''
J. A. Macon: A shot-gun kin out
vote a good size' OJtup'ny o' water
million hunters.
THE HAWKEYE MAN.
Robert J. Bardelte Telia a Reporter
Aboat Moms ef lis Early ttras
lea.
Louisville Courier-Journal.
"What lecture will yon deliver this
evening?" askod the reporter.
"I don't know what they want yet,
but I'll give 'em anything in my shop
that they 11 call for. J suppose it will
le the old 'Rise and Fall of the
Mustache,' however. That seems to
be the most popular of my lectures."
"How often have you delivered it?"
I don t know, indeed, bo responded
with a laugh
"I have been hammering
away at it for seven years now, and it
onght have been killed long ago, but it
lsn t. "People like the old things best,
ana inougn i ve goi new ones, mev
hardly ever call for them. I've pub-
lished them, too, but no one seems eon-
Burned with anxiety to read them."
They want to enjoy your society in
your lectures," suggested the reporter.
"Thank you, thank you ; it's possible
they do. As 1 was saying, tlio "Mils
taclie' is probablr more popular, but
thon I have a number or othors. 'How
the World Looks to a Funny Man,' the
'Bright Hide and 'Advice to Young
Men.' I chuck the young men full of
tho lost, and they remember it while
I m talking. Then there are two others,
but these are the principal ones.
"I don't like lecturing," he rattled on,
with a hearty laugh punctuating his re
marks every now and then. "You have
to wear yourself out traveling' around
ovor the country and speaking thosamo
thing over and over until you are sick,
It's not like law, and it ain't eqnnl to
journalism. I have boon in tho lastbusi-
uoss over since I could do anything, hav-
iug commenced my career of infamy as
a proof-reader. 1 got to reporting
afterward, and I tell you, for a wild,
free luxurious, lotus-eating existence,
thero's nothing like it. At work all
day and all night, when other people
aro awake and when they aro asleep! I
used to run all ovor town hunting up
dog-tights, and thon when I'd go home
at 3 o'clock in tho morning if I started
to sing a little I'd ho collarod by a
watchman. I tried to explain to him
that people made all the noise they
could whilo I was aslocp, and I wanted
to equalize things, but it didn't have
any effect upon him. Then there was
the strain of having to look up news.
It was so bad, and tho trouble of in
venting items was so great that it was
probably tho cutiso of ' my prcsont
wrotched occupation
"Was that beforo you started vour
paper?"
"Ao, indeed; i must confess to that
crime, but I repented it sincerely, he
lievo mo I have. JJid you evor start a
daily paper No? ell you ought to
try it. Fulling down stairs with a stovo
on top of you is nothing to bo compared
to it in point of excitement.
"The name of that paper was Tho Re
view, and it was started to till a long-
felt want. Jerry Cochrane was mv
partner. There were sovornl very com
forting things about that paper. For
instance, Jerry and I always knew on
Monday that wo wouldn't liavo enough
money to pay tho hands oil' on Satur
day, and wo never did. Tho hands
knew it, too, and so their nerves were
never shocked by a disappoint
ment, wo ran mat way ior awhile,
getting more deeply iu debt
all tho tiin". At last, one morning, I
entered the ollico and found Jerrv
looking rather solemnly. Morrv,' s ivs
1, 'you want u partner.' 'Yes, wo need
a new one, Bob,' he rejoined. 'A busi
ness man,' snid 1. 'One with exeeutivo
ability,' said he. 'A financier,' I ob
served. 'A man who can take hold of
the thing and turn it into money,' he
concluded. 'Then 1'vo got the man
you want,' I said, and introduced Frank
Hitchcock, tho sheriff. Jerry said
Frank was tho vory man lie had been
thinking of, so we installed him at once.
Sir, he proved to bo all wo had antici
pated, and ho ran the paper with the
greatest success until he had turned it
entirely into money. When we wound
up tho concern there was nothing left
but two pusses-one to Cincinnati and
one to Burlington. We divided them,
uud went in dillcrcnt directions.
"I got to Burlington feeling pretty
bad. 1 was about two hundred thou
sand miles in debt, having managed to
owe everybody I knew. 1 would have
used the straugm's, too, only I had no
way ... musing v ueir acq .am a ce. urn,
day I remarked to Mrs. Burdottothat I
way of making their acquaintance. One
believed I'd go over and see if I couldn't
get a job on I he llawkeye. I post
ponod it for awhile, and one day the
business manager camo over to oiler mo
a place. 1 could have hugged the man,
but I didu't want to bo demonstrative,
so I held back rather coyly. Ho asked
mo li l naa anyuung in view, aim now
him I did. It was the truth, as I had
an idea of goimr out to tho poor
house, if I could get a rido on the cars.
1 was too proud to walk. AVcll, bo
urged mo, and I finally agreed to tako
the matter into consideration. 1 was to
go in at li o'clock tho next afternoon,
and I bid him a chilly good-day. For
fear I'd miss the train, I was down there
at a quarter to 4, but when I entered
The llawkeye ollico I walked in liko a
lord aud called the business manager
'Charier.' slapping him familiuclv on
tho back. I tell
you his offering mo
tho place gave me a great moral ad-
vantage, and I used it, tho result being Henry Clay which has had somo singn
tliat 1 a as allow ed tho usual princely lar fortunes, having been meturaor
aalary of a reporter. phosod in a western paper iuto an ad-
"1 worked along for awhile, and finally
got an iuterost in The llawkeye, which
thon increased its circulation. A curious
thing happened after a while, which has
caused me to laugh mauy a time. There
were four of us on the editorial page,
Frauk Hatton, Johu L. Waite and John
Burdetto, my brother. Frank was tho
first ono taken from that glorious band,
and he became first assistant postmaste
general. John Wait followed by Ik
; .;.. ..i
VVIUUIK irvntiunoivi vi imii ailiKVUii. tali I
my brother was then appointed I collector
in the First internal revenue district of
utuo, r rank was born in l odu, aite
in Ravenna, and my brother in Cinciu-
nati, all in tho same statd. I was from
Pennsylvania and didn't get anything.
It takes Ohio men for omees.
Do you think of publishing another
book Boonl" I
"rerhap I Will. I've published! two
or threo already, but I bavent bought
a yacht with the proceeds. Lecturing
pavsjiottor, as the following incident
will show:
"IwasatTalmage'ihouse lost sum
mer, having delivered a lecture at the
Tabernacle. I spent the night with
him, and be mentioned that he wrote
an article once which be offered
to sell, with the copyright, to a
magazine for $25. It was refusod;
so he went to another, and
still another, with the same result.
He didn't know what to do. I
wasn't a sermon, and it couldn't lieaold,
so he turned it into a lecture. It was,
'Bright Hide of Things,' and be said
that, at the lowest computation, it had
already bromrht him in t2.r.000. and was
bis proporty yet. That shows the dif-
ference betweon printed and spoken
lanmiaao.
"Come in and soe me again when I'm
around. I'm going home to Mrs. Bur
dette and son. If you will go, good-by.
You are about to forget your umbrella,
I'm traveling and don't nood it: so you'd
better take it along. You are rich, I
suppose, and can afford it"
GIRLS WHO 00 GUNNING,
Heir a Con pie of California Iaasea
tiring Daws Feathered Ciaaae.
Vallejo Chronicle.)
A solitary sportsman, roaming over
the Alvarodo marshes on Sunday last
in pursuit of the ducks, which were few
and far between, bethought himself of
an artesian well in the distance where
he might slake his thirst When he
reached thedosiredspothesaw two girls
seated on tho margin, dressed in a pe
culiar and striking costume. They wore
tunics extending to the knees, longrub-
ber boots, hunting coats and caps, and
were provided with an exeolloiit brace
of breech loading shotguns, uesuie
them lay a pile of teal, widgeon, and
rail, ample testimony to their skill in
the use of thoir weapons. The hunter
raised his hat, and, presuming on the
fraternity of sport, inquired if the la
dios had good luck. Ihov pointed tri
nmphantly to their birds, and then
claimed sympathetically at tlioir inter
relator's lluccid game bag. Both were
unusually prottv girls, their cheeks
brown from exposure, showing that it
was not their first excursion, and tho
hands with which they dubbed tho cool
wator upou thoir heated faces wore
whito and dimpled. They confossod
that tho oddity of their costume made
thorn shun the male hunter, though the
sportsman confossod that he had never
boliovod that rubber boots could look so
cunning,
Just then a bunch of teal came down
the wind w.th lightning speed, and both
Kirls snuuttod on tho marsh in a mo-
mcnt. Along s.vent the birds, bang
went both guns, aud three birds fell to
tho ground. Ihoy picked thorn up,
and, with a generosity altogether un-
Kliown to tne mine s norisiunii, uiioreu
him a brace of the birds, as he had tho
courtesy to ullow them to do tho shoot
ing.
Thovcxpla ned how they camo to lio
hunters. One was extremely delicnto,
and, after graduating at a woll-known
seminary m Alameda county, was roc
ommemied outdoor exerciso hv tho doc
tors as tho only ovapo from consump
tion. Tired of objectless strolling, tho
girl, under the kindly tutorship of hor
uncle, learned to shoot, converted, a
companion to tho sport, and both are
now passionately attached to hunting
They visit tho best duck passes in Ala
meda county, where snipe aro to be
folmil, tho good quail covers, and sol
1 . .'.I L - I . .
uom return whiioiii generous ous.
He Hiild lllniM-ir Cheap.
Oaubury News.)
A hat finisher in ono of tho hat fao
tories here applied for n pension, and in
his application stated that on account
of disease contracted in tho ormy ho
could not do more than half work.
Ono day there appeared in his shop
a long, lank individual in a long, lank
ulster, who took quite an interest in hat
making. He was especially pleased
with tho finishing, lie camo around to
whoro our friend was at work, and after
watching his motions a moment said :
"Aro you new at fio business .'"
"Newt What makes you think I'm
new?" hastily asked our friend.
Nothing," said tho long, lank man
pleasantly, ''onlv that I thought you
tlion i w oi k as iasi us uio uuicrs.
Fast ns the others!" gasped our
friend. "I'll bet $"," ho added with
t .tlt I Can finish more hats than
' '. . , H .
any other man in this shop.
A few days later tho rapid hat fin
isher received word that his petition
for a pension was refused.
Tho long, lank man in tho long, lank
ulster was a detectivo in the employ of
tho pension bureau.
Moaie lioat 1'oem of Whlttler.
Harpor's Magsimi&j
Many poems thrown off at moments,
and of which the author thought
so lightly ui no included them
in no collection, aro now lost.
Among these are "Isabella of Austria,'
written when ho was but 'UK and said to
bavo a grand ring to it; "l'alo Alto,"
which, assuming to bo the translation
of a Mexican lament beginning with tho
words "Bio Bravo I Kio Bravo!" never
did appear under his name; "Bolivar,"
a copy of which a revolutionary general
commanding in Venezuela has lately
requested of the author; and a poem on
dross to Mr. Benton, and again read, ou
the occasion of a publio welcome to
Vicksburg given Sergt. Trentiss, as tho
effort of an admiring southern poet, and
still later appearing in the shape of an
apottropho to Smith tho Mormon.
"
A L . 001 .,''"'p
i kT" i i .
T.en h hh, ho?1 ir nt to
Julio,. to spend a week at riianksg.v.
iug sno wrote a lunor va Amjumc.i
. aI a. !
t!,J ?TS u
",e e,rrt f rU,.a 1,er n'nK:
f ; : . . . ,
P1"1, Utc? the f
Izl"7 .c ...r-
Amy a atUl sick.
J. M. T). ; A true nhiiiwmhv nf lifo
fnnM tmh that it u .r.ir Ar:h
m - hila tn liv in. an ttmiunliDM nf wnrrr
.linnl matter whioh nnnt .n.
troL
PABTHEB3 15 A "EE3TE22iY.w
Twa Colire1 4;railrmea Who II si
Taken Lntnnuu la the V laaaeial Art
ef Bteir-Vrreaae.
Arkanww Traveler.)
Brorliyjohn and Government Pete, two
colureJ gentlemen of eminence, raised a crop
of cotton together, ami with tbe profit,
moved to town and twtublUned a restaurant.
Wben the first of the mouth came, John
went to Fete and said :
M VVuut we gwinter to pay off wllf
"Blame 'fl know."
"IV'hut we gwine ter eat ter mor'f "
"Blame '11 know."
"Wall," said John, after perplexed reflec
tion, "bow's we gwiuter run die beah res
terrawf "1 doesn't know dat, nuttier.",
"An' yer doan seem tor be much consarned
bout It."
"No, I'se restln' easy. Dun got 'nuff ter
eat fur one week, an' ef I al'ers feels as full
I done now, I doan want nutbin' ter eat"
"Ver's a fooL Pete, dat'i wbut yer Is."
"Oh, no, j-erse'f de fool, 'case yer's bod
derin' 'bout su'thlu' what yer hain't got I'm
gwine stay 'rouu' an' beah, money ur nc
money, I bet by de time de u Ider fokes glU
'nuff ter eat I'll be chawin' iu thin .
"Yaa, Poto, but slier our money's dui
gone."
"Data all right Wa wss de ones whit
spent it an' we aiu' got no room to complain.
(- in away an' study flosofy."
8xi i afturward John slipped luto the home,
Uaj tne toe of a stocking from a bole in the
wall and mused: "Thought times would git
bard, so I jes put a little lu'tnin' aside for
myse f.
Shortly after John went out, Pete slipped
in, took an old pocket from under a box, and
aid to himself, "sorter thought dat a dark an'
rainy day would come Youn' bimeby, an'
thought I'd better look out for ole Peter. Ole
Pete, lemme congraterlate you right beah,
ain't a man ter fool 'way his time. Donn Lk
ter fling 'splclons on a man's carockter, but it
doan seem tor me dat ole John is er bonus
man nohow."
Fanny t'rrn and family.
I told Mr. Derby, the veteran publisher,
bow dttlighted I used to bs when Finny
Fern's bright meditations ufed to come out
In The Boston Olive Rranch.
"Yes," be said, "Tbe Olive Branch paid hor
13 for each article, with which ho
barely managed to support -herself aud
her children in a miserable manner. I
thought I saw merit an 1 money iu them.
They wen? widely circulated, and Tlia Ho ne
Journal used often to copy them. Her
brother, N. P. Willis, the brilliant editor of
that paper, associated with Morris, aw uoth
ing iu Fanny's writings. He gave ber no en
couragement, an 1 sent ber word that she had
better go to nmkinj filing; but Gen. Morris
liked her work very much, and so did the as
sistant editor, Jumei Parton. The latter
gave Blad hospitality to many of
her fugitive paragraphs. This led to
his acquuiutanco with ber, aud I think
it was after be had married her
that Willis w.-u served up in ber novel as
Appoll i Hyaciuthe. Be.-Art husband was
Churles Elili'idge,of Bosion, but wiieu heUied
she formed nu ill-assorted marriage with a
Mr. Farriugton, whom she was obliged to
leave. About tbe time that her writings at
tracted my attention Robert Bonner made
her the splendid offer of f lot) a column for
The Ledger. I went to Boston an I got her to
collect her 'Fern Leaves,' which had a great
circulation. Khe accepted a royalty l.istead
of the 1,000 down, which I offered" her, and
she made $10,000 the ill's t year.
"Af Ur she became famous and independent
her brother, N. P., began to recognize her iu
a gingerly manner, aud toward the close of
Ins life, when he became sick and morbid, she
went and took cure of him and did all she
could to comfort his declining years. Shu
constantly contributed to The Ledi-r a!iiust
to the last day of her life. By the way,
Funny Kern's daughter, who married Morti
mer Thompson (tWtieks), afterwards con
trihuted to Tho Ledger, and the Miss Ellle
Thompson, who now writes for the same
paper, is Fanny Fern's gnuuldaugliter."
Ilean Mauley's reuniaiishln.
A correspondent of The Manchester Ex
aminer says that h'j once received from Dean
Btnuly the most Inscrutable epistle he ever
beheld. It was written upon jwor blue pa
per and in two kiwis of ink, the hut r r-or-tion
iu black and the former in ink about
tho color of brown vinegar. The writing
Iwd a thin, scratchy look aud suggested the
thought that it had been written with nn old
pen with only one prong, or with the point
of au old stocking-neeulc. There were no
distinct letters as such, hut a series of nerv
ous jieeks at the papr with something
smeared with ink.
"1 tried over and over asaiu for several
days," says the correspondent, "to decipher
the missive, but to no purp.we. I procured a
magnifying glass, and was simply dismayed
at the result I held it up to a strong eas-
light, and tried to rea 1 the front throtuh
tho t nek, and I bo back through the front I
tried to road it perpendicularly, horizontally
and from each of tho four corners diagonally
and at last flung myself full length upon the
hearth-rug, sprea I the tmializing docu
ment uism the fender, and sought a friendly
revolution from the glow of the fire, but iu
vain. As a last resource I took it to a clever
schoolmaster, who, after looking carefully
over It from beginning to end, somowhut dis
couraged me by askiug me who it was frou:
and what it was about. He labored at it
more or les f jr five weeks and then eravely
a.-su.vd me that the man who could read
such writing was not yet born."
A Dangtrona Weed.
Fannie Brigham Ward.
Everywhere in Mexico one And Mm nnin.
ous weed toloachi, though it grows most
wiruiy m tne tropical lowlands ot the tierra
calicute. Ib is a harmless lookiui nlant
much rosonililintr nnrtlurn milk inul
quite too dangerously common in aland
where suspicion rules and jealousy amounts
to madness. It does not kill, but immediately
acts upon the braiu, producing first violent
insauity. and theu hopeless idiocy. A few
drorwoftho tiutelM fluid mir,l with
or other food, does tho diabolical work with
luexoranio certainty, and cannot be detected
eicent in its efTm-fx. It i n-hknAiwi fhf
poor Csrlotta bat bandy lauded at Vera
Crux, ou her sorrowful mission to this coun
try. before it was aJinm!ktired to h.T an,!
her deplorable fate is cited as one among
many inxuiuce. ui all file dangers in Mexico
tills is one of the nu,t huiikIImit An nn.
utical enemy, jealous rival, or credo, may
uiiu reve nge uunseu, m a mors neuuisn man
ner tban with tbe stiletto, and without tW
of detection.
Chlraco Veraea.
Philadelphia Call.
Contributor: Your verses bwrlnnintr.
"Two little feet so small that both nestle in
one warm buffalo robe," are declined. We
never print Chicago poetry.
'Xo. sir." said a nractintl InwWn nn
brioabrac on tbe mantel for met It's a
nuisance. W hem's a man to put his feetr
Col Urn : Most of our niiafortunm am mnm
supportable than the comment of our
upon them.
LONDON'S GIN-PALACES.
Heeaea la the Urrat Clty'e Thoroach
fareTbe Depth of llaasaa Uld
eaasaeaa.
0. R. Sims in London News.)
A Saturday night in the great
thorouorhfare adiacent there are three
eorner publio'houses which take as much
money as tho whole of tue oiner Biiops
on both sides of the way put together.
Butchers, bakers, greengrocers, clotn
iers, furniture dealers, all the caterers
for the wauts of the populace, are open
till a late hour; there are hundreds of
them trading round and about, but tbe
whole lot do not take as much money
as three publicans that is a fact
ghastly enough in all conscience. Enter
the publio bouses and you wui Bee mem
crammed. Here are artisans and labor
ers drinking away the wages that ought
to clothe their little ones. Here are
the women squandering the money that
would purchase food for the luck of
which their children are dying.
One group rivets the eye of an ob
server at once. It consists of an old
gray-haired dame, a woman of 40, and
a girl of about l'J with a baby in ber
arms. All these are in a state whioh is
best described as "maudlin" they have
finished one lot of gin, and the young
est woman is ordering another round.
It is a great-grandmother, grandmother
and a mother and her baby four gen
eratious together and they aro all
dirty, dishevelled, and drunk, except
the baby, aud even the poor little mite
may have its first taste of alcohol pres
ently. It is no uncommon sight in
theso places to see a mother wet a
baby's lips with gin and water. The
process is called "giving the young 'tin
a taste," aud the baby's father will look
on sometimes and' enjoy the joko im
mensely. But the time to Bee the result of a
Saturday night's heavy drinking in a
low neighborhood is a tor the houses
are closed. Theu you meet dozeus of
poor wretches reeling homo to their
miserable dens, some of them rolling
across the roadway and falling, cutting
themselves till the blood flows. Every
penny iu some instances bos gone in
drink.
One dilapidated, ragged wretch I mot
last Saturday night was gnawing a
baked potato. By his side stood a thin
clad woman bearing a baby in hor anus,
and iu hideous language she reproached
him for his selfishness. She had
fetched him out of a public-house with
his last halfpenny in his pocket. With
that halfpenny he had bought the
potato, which he refusod to share with
her. At every corncr tho police are
ordering or coaxi g men or womon to
"move ou." Between 12 and 1 it is a
long procession of drunken men and
women, and the most drunken seem to
bo those whoso outward appearance
betokens tho most abjoct poverty.
, Turn out of tho main thoroughfare
and into the dimly-lighted street and
you como upon scene after scene to the
grim, grotesque horror of Inch only
the pencil of a Dore could do justice.
Women with hideous distortcd faces are
rolling from sido to side shrieking
aloud snatches oi popular songs plenti
fully interlarded with tho vilest expres
sions. Men as drunk as themselves
meet them, there is a short interchange
of ribald jests and foul oaths, then a
quarrel and a slio vor of blows. Down
from one dark court rings a cry of mur
der, and a woman, hor lace hideously
gashed, maltes across the narrow road
pursued by a howling madman. It is
only a drunken husband having a row
with his wife.
The KnsliNlunaii'a Determination.
Detroit Free Press.
Obstinate as a mule, stubborn ns a
bull-dog, the dillicnlties in his path will
net but as incentives to him. He has
traced himself a programme; nothing
will prevent him carrying it out. He
leaves England with his diary written
beforehand. He has settled to be at
the top of a certain mountain at a cer
tain time; he is bound to bo there, and
I promise you that, if he has not rolled
down some precipice, thero you will
find him. (Jen. Wolsoley had an
nounced to his co.tntrymen that he
would subdue Egypt in twelve days.
Ho took fifteen. It was high time;
John Hull was beginning to grumble.
I was walking ouo evening on the
quay at St. Malo. It was blowing a
furious gale. Tho Southampton boat
had just started, notwithstanding.
Camo two Englishmen, breathless.
"Where is the boat?" they asked.
"Cone."
"Had her; she is still in sight; we
are bound to go 1"
" Surely, geutlemon, you are joking."
" Well, then, can you get us a sailing
bont to take us to Jersey?"
" I have one," said a sailor, ' but the
sea is very rough; I must charge you
200 francs."
" Never mind ; got her ready."
"But, gentlemen," cried the" bystand
ers, "you will be ill and endanger vour
lives."
' What's that to you?" said they, with
a contemptuous glance at the crowd
around.
Anrntot er the Commodore.
Cor. Cincinnati Enquirer.
Tho writer was once standing in the
office of Congress hotel, ia Rochester,
N. Y., when old Cornelius Yanderbilt,
father of the present great railroad
king, walked in accompanied by sev
eral magnates of tho New York Cen
tral. "Hand me down that box," said old
Cornelius, Bpcaking to the clerk behind
the cigar counter and pointiug to a box,
each cigar of which sold for 1.
The old man selected four cigars, and,
throwing down a $5 bill, again said to
the elerk, "Hand me down that 10-cont
box." The clerk obeyed, and tho old
man clawed out a hand.'ul and tossed
thera to his companions, saying:
"Here; these are good enough for
you."
-Far the Offleea."
Chicago Herald.
Tho Mormon church now includes a
president, 12 apostles, 68 patriarchs,
3.883 sentinels, 3,153 high priests, 11,
000 choirs, 1,500 bishops, and 4,400
deacons. In Arizona there is a mem
bership of 2,262, in Idaho twice as
many, and Mormon missionaries are at
work all over Europe and the United
States.
CONFEDEEATE COTTON.
Ita nemorillxInK laflaeare apoa
Army Ofllrrra. and upoa Politic.
"Oath" in Cincinnati Enquirer.
"Give me an idea of that cotton business
during tbe wart"
"After we got into tbe strict cotton belt,?
said Gen. Herron, "in the state of TennesesA
and further on, the price of cotton had V
enormously advanced by cutting off the turf j
ply from America that it may Ucliald to baf
been as valuable as gold. Then was a
pressure from every part of the world to get
at such cotton as our armies relieved. The
blockade of the southern ports prevented the
Confederates sending it out, and tbe Con
federate government seized a great deal of
their own cotton as the capital to conduct
the war. Tbe moment wa captured Nash- .
viUe, and pusned up and down the rivenu'o
tbe south, there came into our camps, )J
vided with abundant money and with all lb
presents and inducements that sharp traders
carry, men representing Manchester, New
York, Rouen, Saxony, and a single bale of
cotton was quite a prize. The tendency wni'
greatly to demoralize the officers of the ai A 1,7 -V
and you can attribute some of tbe demoraliza
tion in our politics to that very cotton-buying,
which first tempted some of tbe officers
out of their honesty, and finally threw them
into politics and tbe lobby at Washington.
"Now I will give you an instance on the
other side. After tbe capture of Vicksburg
Gen. Grant sent me up the Yazoo river with
an expedition to capture Yazoo City. Tbe
Yazoo lies In a bottom, and is a magnificent
cotton land all the way up. The rebels had
fortified Yazoo City, and it was necessary
for Grant's operations to drive them off to the
east and north, lest they might reinforce tha
Confederate! at Jackson, Miss., against
whom another expedition had been sent. 1
went op to Yazoo City and captured lbs
place and found there about 3,000 bales ot
cotton, all marked as tbe property of tha
Confederate states. Borne of it was in boats, .
but most of it In warehouse. While I pursued
the flying Confederates off to the east I left
orders to have that cotton put on steam
boats and sent down to Vicksburg as tha
property of tbe United States. When I re
turned from tbe expedition it was all ready,
ana I took it down to the river and turned It
over at V.cksburg to the chief quartermaster.
There were something over twenty-nine
hundred bales. Years passed by, and tbe
southern claims business started up.
Curiosity led me tp examine into the settle
ment of that particular prize of cotton, and
I found that our government had paid for ,
twelve thousand bales, or more than nine
thousand more bales than I hod seized."
Patience and Perseverance of tbe
Chlnean Noldlery.
Hong Kong. Cor. Philadelphia Press.
Tbe Chinese are good soldiers. Patient,
obedient and long-suffering, they share with
other Orientals a certain contempt for death.
Their officers are stolid, determined and ath
letic men, who are accustomed to boast of
their endurance. They may not be capable
of many brilliant strategical movements, but
they make up for that defect by cunning and
determination. They tlx a certain object in
their minds and go for it, no matter how
ong it takis them to accomplish it
The campaigns against the Panthays in tbe
southern portion of tbe empire and the Kasb
garians iu the northwest are notable exam
ples of this peculiarity of Chinese officers,
and suggest the great difficulty which the
French will have in overcoming the pertinac
ity of purHe which seems to. tuke no
thought of time. The Panthays were Mo
hammedans, who tried to assert their inde
pendence. The Chinese army left Pekin and
moved along so leisurely that the Panthays
enjoyed for many years the belief that they
were to be permitted to enjoy their freedom
unmolested. One flue morning, however, tha ,
Chinese army npitnred in Yunnan. They
swarmed Uon the Panthays in such num
bers that very few Mohammedans were
left in the country.
Again, as regards Kashgar, the Chinese
troops performed a similar feat. Yakooh
Beg, a bold Turkestan adventurer, carved
for himself with his sword a kingdom out of
tho northwest of the Chinese empire. He
reigned for yeai, and established himself ai
pureutly so firmly upou his throne that he
was recognized as nn independent sovereign
by tbe government of India, which sent him
vuluab.'e prcsenta and distinguished em
bassies. All these years, however, the Chi
nese soldiers were moving against him
slowly but surely. They would bait
in their march when they came
to a fertile spot, erect their tents,
put aside their weapons, and go out
into the fields and sow them with grain.
Then they quietly waited for months until
the crops had grown. Reaping the grain,
they would repleuisb their supplies and re
sume thoir march. Iu this way, year after
year, they marched and sowed, and reaped
and marched again, until at length they ap
peared in Kashgar in irresistible force, slew
Yakoob Beg, destroyed his army and retook
the territory. It was one of the most re
markable campaigns, uot only for the length
of the siege, but for tbe patient determina
tion which it displayed on tbe part of men
and officers.
How Tom Ochiltree Has Chansed.
National Republican.
"There's nothing changes a man like being
elected to congress," said an ancient friend
of Tom Ochiitree in WUlard's tha other
night "He and I used to be inseparable when
he was in Washington before. It was 'Tom'
and 'Joe' between us then. He's a member
of congress now, and he calls me 'Mr. .'
He used to wear a muslin shirt with pink
aud b'ue borse-shoes on it as big
as trade dollars. He would tuke
off bis coat and vest, and tbe people wouid
gather in crowds to look at the resplendent
shirt while be would play billiards. He never
comes into the billiard-room now, and the
other day when I went to his room I bod to
send up my cord first be was being dressed
by four colored boys, body-servants, be
called 'em. One was shaving and another
was putting on socles, and he was ordering '
the otber two around the room for a shirt
with more starch in it and a stiffer hair
brush and a bottle of perfumery and a mani
cure set and an embroidered pocket handker
chief. He just sat there and let those four
boys dress him." , . 1
Why the Dogl
From the FreB
Gentleman (in barber's cS
notices a dog
who sits close by him reg
,g him with
fixed attention) What is thy
dog staring at
me that way for)
Barber (indifferently) That dog is always
there. You know, if I happen to cut off a
piece of an ear
Geutleman Weill
Barber O, well -he eat it
lie K He Cenld Celebrate.
Chicago New.
An editor was once Hear Remark that
although he Had Los'.iven Dollars at
Poker, bad been Indicux for Libel, and
Suffered excruciating Agonies with a Soft
Corn, he was still In a Mood to Piously cele
brate Thanksgiving in Spirit and in Trot,
having just Learned that the Editor of k
Loathsome ContBfnDorarv had Pallon don X
Flight of Stairs and Broken his Leg.
L
1