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About The Eugene City guard. (Eugene City, Or.) 1870-1899 | View Entire Issue (Feb. 2, 1884)
rllnrrlet Preseott Rpofford In The Continent!
Ago comes to some people only like the
wider ojH'iilag of the rose, the gentle droop
ing of the creamy outtT petal, and one must
needs think of this In looking at Mr Fer
nalde. "I have bad niy threescore apd ten,"
she used to say. "I have had all that nature
has to give, aud now 1 am living on grace."
It was a sunny spirit that informed her, a
lightsomeness that never let the substance of
a tea. jpenetrate beneath the surface that
coul I endure nothing but happiness, iter
unfailing good ua'.urewas like a rairy wino.
that smoothed every trouble out of her way
and out of tlie way of every one about her.
If her liair was white, no great sorrow hod
tniule it so; and ita contrast with the soft
brilliancy of the black eye and the velvet
flush of a cheek unwritten by many lines,
made her perbapa a lovely as one standing
f in all the full radiance ol yomn. as ior
Fernalde-UU, dark, spare-he was by no
means unattractive, and his courtly manners
iliad a unique elegance. II lovea nis ease,
nnd annoyances, when they chanced to break
through the magic circle tils wile arew buoui,
him, vexed blm, as tbey usually do a nervous
person. For the rest, be was one of those
men who, having led a singularly fortunate
life, maintain to themselves a fancy that
they have just missed the last stroke to make
the crystal complete, who have a vanishing
ideal always just beyond the sight and
The Fernaldes were neighbors of ours.
Wealth required no exertion of them, aud
advancing age secluded them m some
I measure from general society; their home
J was alwavs cheerful; they were always in it;
and if there had been no such person as
J crabbed old Mrs. Talliafero. who had siwnt
I the last six month with them, it would have
been hard to see how heaven itself could lie
much improvement on it. However, she was
going at once, and then where would be the
crumple in the roso-leaf!
They loved young people. "The new
generation lends us a part of its freshness,"
ibey used to say. They always welcomed
any of us, and indeed made me so particu
larly conscious of their flattering favor that
I siKsnt a good portion of my time with
them, threaded the sweet little lady's needles,
read and wrote more or less for Mr.
Fernnlde, and was gradually taken into
their confidence In a way I did uot desire,
since I am about to violate it
'Could I imagine a happier old age than
this, my child, with my wife, my health, my
flowers, our birds and pete and friends f" he
said once, re)eatiug my question. "Why,
yes, my dear, it was much happier before my
wife brought Mrs. Talliafero to stay with
us. Somo old schoolmate or girl friend of
hem, I don't quite know whom, for the fact
is she nettled me so the first day sho came
that I wouldn't ask Rosalie a word about
her, for fear I should show my displeasure
at her having brought her home when she
turned up. It is astounding how an invisibly
small thorn will destroy your equaiumity.
And then this woman bos a quality that
would turn honey into vinegar, I do believe.
She has changed our quiet, peaceful, sun
shiny life, that seemed like one long day iu
June, into a sharp, raw day In JNovemuer.
There is something very rasping about her.
1 don't see why my wife invited her to 8end
such a season with us for. I wondor if she
thought that at the end of the time I should
press for a continuance I My dear, I have
counted the days it sounds sadly against
all hospitable rites I have counted the
days till I should see her consult a railway
time-table, as she did yesterday, about going
home to-day. I believe she is not in affluent
circumstances now. I would be glad to
meet the expense of boarding her awayl 1
am speiik'ng strongly. Yes, Rosalie," look'
ing at his laughing wife, 1 know you say
too stronglv. Rut it is argument, assertion,
contradiction, differing, bickering, finding
fault with the servants who have suited us
half a lifetime, questioning the expenditure,
disordering the arrangements from one day
to tbe next 1 uink of it, when she comes
into my study and declares that my wife
has the patience of the play to endure such a
den of disorder iu her house. She wonders
that I do not wear a scratch. She warns me
of indigestions, she threatens me with night
mares, she reminds me of my age, she inter
feres with my pipe I And then she wanU so
much fresh air! Thank heaven! her time is
up to-dav, aud my wife will not invite
another guest for a half year with
out giving me time to arrange a residence
elsewhere! And such a voice, tool When one
hears it, one longs for the proer infirmities
of age that dull the hearing shirp as a file,
piercing as a locust's whirr! What are you
laughing at, Rosalie f"
"Ah, you are not quite just, my love," said
the sweet little lady. "Mrs. Talliafero bas a
fine mind. She is really waking us up. She
prevents our sinking down into a jelly-like
existence, as so many at our age do. She
kueeis us bubbling."
"There, there, there, my dear! Don't say
another word about your Mrs. Talliaferol Oo
and sjieud a season with her at Saratoga, if
you ever want to see her acy more. I'll go
to Richfield. Bubble! She'd make sulphuric
acid bubble out of the sands of the desert!
I've no doubt she worried Tulliufero, poor
man, into the grave! But there, I've said too
much," he added directly. "I beg your par
don, my sweet, if I hurt your feelings about
an old friend, but really Now, Rosalie,
my love, if you dont care to go over
these accounts, our young friend will.'
And then Mrs. Fernalde tripped off
with as light a foot as a girl of 17,
and I drew up the great folding-screen
around our chairs, stirred the fire a little,
and took pencil aud paper to add up the
figures Mr. Fernalde was to read out to me.
But Mr. Fernalde was in a brown study for
a little, and I let him stay.
"It was strange you should have asked rae
that question, child," he said at length. "I
used, at your time of life, to imagine a very
differeut old age from this, if I may so call
that imagination, for, -in fact, old age never
entered into my calculations. I imagined
nothing about the passage of time, only of
the continuance of a condition. And that
condition was the perpetual paradise of
"Rosalie, you mean," said L
"I beg your pardon," said Mr. Fernalde
shortly. "I mean Alicia."
"Alicia, who, when I was twenty, was the
light of my eyes and the loadstir of my life,"
"I don't know what you mean, sir."
"Of course you don't, of course you don't
I've half the mind to tell you, though. It's
a long time ago a long time aud no harm
done. Oae is perhajie a fool at 70,"
said Mr. Fernalde presently again. "I'm
not quite 80. One is certainly a fool at
20. L was, at any rate, but I didn't
know it and I walked in a fool's paradise.
And to be a fool and not know it! Is there,
on the whole, any farther paradise! Pretty,
pretty as a peach!" he began again, after an
other pause, "Ah! that sounds to us like
profauity. That heavenly fair face, those
eyes like the stars in a blue midnight! that
smile of exquisite innocence and purity 1 I
used to tremble before ber sometimes as be
fore some young saint stepped from a shrine
one that I dared to desecrate by loving.
Ah, how I loved her! The sight of certain
flowet i brings her back to me now! When
the applo trees are in blossom, that pink and
white snow, that ineffable delicacy of ier
fume, calls her before me like a revelation!
There are times when this eternal smooth
new of things iu my life palls me times
when I cannot bear the sound of evening
belU coming across the water. It so renews
for me that evening that evenin ; when I
lost her when I lost her if I found Rosalie!"
"You lost her thenf" I said, to break the
silence that followed.
"I will tell you. The two were In
separable. If I walked or role or
sailed with one, the other was not far
away. Rosalie was a little gay, toniiKiitiiig
nitrite. Alicia was a pensive saint. It was
Alicia's home; her father was a man of
wealth, and Rosalie was visiting her. Roe
alie had no homo, no fortune; she ha I just
finished school and was to be governtws,
(.reading it as a butterfly might dread lioing
broken to harness, dreading it all the more
for this gliini8 of luxurious life iu her
friend's home since school. I myself had a
fortune in my own right, and had been
guilty of the follies of most of the jeuuesse
doree of that period, which, if comparatively
innocent were troublesome enough to the
authorities of my college to need discipline,
aud I was pausing a year of most unliappy
rustication in the place adjoining Alicia's
home. Never shall I forgot the first moment
in which I saw Alicia running down one of
the orchard aisles with her white garments
fluttering about her, and her fair head bent
over the branch of apple blossoms in her
band. If lightning had fallen, the revolu
tion that seized me could uot bare come more
quickly. I seemed to be changed in a
twinkling, to have been borne Into
another planet I felt as if sun
shine had pierced and penetrated once im
penetrable gloom. When I fell asleep in the
grass of that orchard, and woke with that
heavenly creature bending over me, I rose
only to walk ou air. The little brown face
of Rosalie, with its carnations, with the glint
and glance of its great brown eyes, with its
flood of brown curls that had a touch of gold
on them, with the glittering teeth of its
beautiful laugh, was just over her shoulder,
but I merely know 1 saw it by remembering
it afterward. Sho was only a shadow to me
in those days; and as for me, I was only
Alicia's shadow myself. She lived and
moved In some exalted atmosphere, to my
perception. She does now. Her father wore
the front of Jove; I could not say that he did
not carry the thunders. I felt myself a mote
in the broad beam of their sunshine, as
though I were something hardly visible in
their lurge range of vision, as if it required
an effort to make myself jwrceived by them.
I hesitated to make the effort I worshiped
from afar. When she spoke to me my heart
beat so I had hardly voice to answer; when
she touched my hand it thrilled me through
and through. And I asked no more. I
thought of no more for a whilo than just to
continue so forever; to see her from my win
dow walking under the Ion? aisles
of the low-branched orchard, lire
some mediievnl picture; to walk
besides her sometimes; now aud then
to veuture reading from tho same jwige with
her; now ami then to be her partner in tho
dance. That Rosalie should be about with
me, riding here, strolling there, walking to
church, reading with the old pastor, in whose
charge there was a Action that I was, and so,
in a way, studyiug with mo that was all a
matter of commonplace; she was sweet, she
was fresh, she was charming. But what
was all that when an angel was in the room?
"One night I was on the gallery just out
side their drawing-room, looking in at the
long window, and Alicia was singing. Ah,
how delicious was that voice I The cherubim
and seraphim who continually do siug, if
I ever hear them, will not sing so sweetly.
I wonder to whom that voice is singing now I
Besides her, that night, was this scamp who
had come to the plnce more than ouce, a
proud, commanding fellow in his undress uni
form, a man whom her father plainly in
tended she should marry. I can see the scene
now the rich aud dimly-lighted room full
of purple shadows, the air laden with the
scent of flowers; Alicia 1j her white drapery,
more mystical, more beautiful, more
holy, as she sang, than if revealed in the
glow of her beauty; outside the violet depths
of the sky, and tbe moon just falling, like
some great golden flower, low in the west;
and as Alicia's voice became silent a choir of
bell tones coining far and flue and free across
the water, like echoes of her song in heaven.
My heart swelled with a fullness of rapture;
life seemed too rich, too sweet, too sacred;
and then I saw that man stoop and kiss her
brow. ' The action turned me to stone for a
moment till he came sauntering to the win
dow, and I knew no more what I was doing
than that bronze Perseus in the comer would
if he moved. I lifted the hand that had
seemed stone, aud as be passed me I struck
him on the mouth, tbe mouth that had doue
And Mr. Fernalde was quiet a little while.
"And that was the end of all things," ho
resumed. "The fellow laughed at me for a
mad boy. Her father launched one of the
thunderbolts, and forbade me the house.
What a stricken day and night of wretched
ness! What a week of hopelessness, of anni
hilation! But perhaps Alicia felt otherwise.
Why Bhould I not discover Why should I
suppose she had any other sympathy with
that creature than the sympathy of the star
aud the worm! And if my glad hope perad ven
ture were true, why then we could fly from
these places that should know us no more;
the world was before us, heaven's gates were
0ien to us. Aud I wrote, my hand trembling
at its sacrilegious daring, just a dozen lines,
without address, without signature. She
would know what it meant And I sent it
by the parson's boy. And I waited for her,
lying on the grass beneath the orchard trees,
in the deep gloom just gilded by the influence
of tbe unseen moon. There came the rust
ling of garments, the tripping of a foot; my
heart beat, my eyes grew dim. Was it she
coming up behind me, as I lay lifted on ray
elbow, kneeling and putting her arms about
me, raining swift kisses ou my face f wild,
sweet kisses in that shadow; wild, passionate
whispers in that silence! And then a great
pang smote me, and I rose and went out with
her into tbe less dim darkness and it was
"She never knew," said Mr. Fernalde, "she
does not know to-day that I died that night
I can't say how I lived through those mo
ments even. They were but moments she
had stolen away. She had to return at once.
We parted at the foot of the mock-orange
walk, aud I went to my bed and lay there iu
a trance of despair. Perhaps sunlight
brought some relief. The parson told
at the breakfast-table tbe news that Alicia
was betrothed to the army officer I had seen
over the hedge. I wrote a word, saying I
was callml away, and I was gone a week or
more. But in that blank I must have some
thing to love me to have an interest la
Better Rosalia than the absolute negation of
those days. She thought nothing of my ab
sence after my return. She was as full of
romance as a flower of nectar. And, to sum
it up, if she was not tbe rose, she had lived
with tbe rose. One day we married, and
here we are. A long life, a happy life, and I
have never regretted the day in it that I made
her my wife. After all, one cannot
marry among the angels clay must
mate with clay. What do you
say I Not love her, my child I
You never were more mistaken. I love her
tenderly, absorbingly. She is a perfect
woman she has been a perfect wife. Slie
has made me calmly and completely liappy.
If ouce in a while the old hoie, the old divam
of a passior. arises and sweeps before me iu its
bloom aud light, it is because it means youth
to me that youth which we do not know till
we are old-U itself the ideal tliat it holds up
for worship. Yet rfeet as my wife U, fifty
years of this smooth life with her w ear some
thing of the commonplace, aud if across their
dead level of same content sometime gleams
the shining of Alicia's face, it is uot in any
disloyalty to her. I often wonder what be
came of the lovely creature. Once I could
uot bave spoken of her. At seldom times,
when I sit alone by the Are, site comes a dsits
besiJe mo, and gleam of light and shadow
uiake free with her sweetness, hor beauty,
her pensive and etherial graej. Deir girl! I
suppose she sleej in her grave by this, but
she is a shaft of the light of heaven iu my
And Mr. Fernalde rose, walking to the
window, just as the screen began to tremble,
and a smothered cough and then au undis
guised one, betrayed to me, if not to him,
that Mrs. Fernalde had heard the chief port
of the mouologue.
"And I had heard it in fragments aud
sections more thau once before," she after
ward told me, with her pleasant smile. "I
know it means nothing that be is just as
wholly mine as' I am his that our love is the
imjwrishahle sort that we are welded into
oue by llfty years together. And perhajw it
was ignoble of me to break the pretty bub
ble, to take away his little ideal, with which
he has found comfort whenever I would have
my own way too much. Yet I thought it
was about time."
But she said nothing of this at all as she
camo bustling round the corner of the screen
"There is such a gale blowing outside," she
said, "that the dust really rises in the house
fit to choke one."
"You haven't caught cold, Rosalie r said
her husband, turning in concern.
"Not the least, but I shall if the hall-door
U open another moment. There sho comes
now. Make haste, and bid Alicia good-bye,
my love. She is just going."
"Who!" he cried, suddenly owning his
cvos liko lauijis in their deep settings.
' "Alicia Mrs. Talliafero dear. She mar
ried nguin, you know. Oh, it has been a line
jest," she cried with her low laugh, i "to
think that you should uot have recognized
Alicia in all these weeks aud months!''
Mr. Fernalde was quiet for a few moments,
lookiug at the sweet littlo la ly before him,
with her color like the halt-tarnished rose,
with tho soft brilliancy of her placid smile.
Then he crossed over tlw hearth before me,
and he took her. hand and bent down aud
kissed her mouth.
"My Rosalie," said he, "will you not make
niy adieux to Mrs. Talliafero youself ( Tell
her tell her I have gone to the fuueiul of au
old friend !''
Chinese Intercut In Mor.tliuiii Stisnr.
For 2,000 years sorghum has been profitably
grown- in China as a cereal, but has never
been utilised as a source of producing sugar.
The experiments made in this country by
well-known scientists iu this direction have
attracted much attention in China. The peo
ple of that couutry nre uot slow to see that if
the clour gain of its sugar value can b) added
to the seed crop it will prove a matter of vast
importance to the empire. Accordingly,
some weeks ago the Chinese embassador and
his two secretaries were among a party of
visitors to the Rio Grande Sugar company's
works, for the purpose of learning what they
could from observation of tho processes em
ployed in the manufacture of sugar from
sorghum. Concerning the interest evinced
by the shrewd and inquisitive representatives
of the Celestial kingdom a eorresioudeut of
The New York Tribune says: "If they had
been sugar experts, inclined to purchase the
whole concern as an investment, they could
not have studied the methods and machinery
more closely or more intelligently. They
watched tbe cauo through the rollers and
followed the expressed juice as it was clari
fied pud boiled through the vacuum pans to
the centrifuguls, and by their searching in
quiries kept Dr. Collier aud Supt Hughes
constantly explaining every detail through
the entire process. When the day was over
there is little doubt that they had a more
comprehensive knowledge of sugar-making
thau any of the American visitors." That
the Chinese ambassadors wont there for a
purpose is evident enough, and the next
thing to be expected is that one of these days
China will be largely engaged in the success
ful manufacture of sorghum sugar.
Jlanaslnx a Illrd Dog.
The average amateur gets his dog talk
from books, and says "To-ho," "Down sir,"
"Down charge," "Retrieve," "Hi sir,"
"Bring to bag," "To heel, sir," etc, etc. if
we ever forgot ourself and lent our dog to
any amateur and he went through this lingo
the dog would come iu at night and try to
sny "Say, pard, that inau you leut me to
this morning must have been drinking, for
he called me a lot of worse names than ever
you did when you licked me for being too
fresh and running over two or three gangs
early in the day." And we wouldn't blame
tho poor dog. We don't hold auy long con
versation with our dog; it takes his mind
away from business. Vhen we get into a
field we say "Yup" and wave our huuds iu
the direction we want him to go.
When be comes to a point, if he seems to
be nervous we say "Yo-o-o," just as we
would to a nervous horse, and if by any ac
cident we manage to kill a bird when tho
covey rises, we simply say "dead" and that
settles it He gets tbe bird, brings it up to
us; sits down and at the word "drop" lets it
fall out of his mouth and hies off again to
fresh fields and pastures new. If be runs
over a bird we yell "Hey! you darn fool f"
and he drops down aud remembers that if be
does it again he will get a corn stalk across
bis flank. And so we go and the longer in
the day he hunts the less we have to say to
him, except to invariably pat hts head and
call him a "good old suoozer" every time he
brings iu a bird.
The I'oreau "Jenkins."
Soh Kwanfl Pom, secretary of the Coreau
embassy at Washington, has made the fol
lowing observations in this country: "The
women of America are all far more beautiful
than any others we bave seen. I notice most
women wear black clothes; many wear blue,
and when the weither is warm, while is very
commonly worn. Some women wear their
bats and bonnets tilted back, showing the
front hair, while others wear them squarely
on the head. Of the two, tho former style is
the nicer to see."
.Unhappy Peru! She not only has the ex
fcirtionute demands of Chili to settle, but she
has :'M generals, 1,400 colonels, 2,-'10 majors,
4,000 captains, and more lieutenants than
anybody can count " waiting for back pay.
She thinks some of selling out at a total
'ew Orleans Picayune: When a giraffe
wants a drink, he knows what long-felt
THE ASTORS Of TO-DAY.
The Itpnrmrntativra of the lirrat
r a mi I. v and Fortune t onmleu uy I lie
New York C r. rittsburp PisaMi.
William 13. Aittor lived a quiet, un
eventful life He wan married t a
daughter of Gen. Armstrong, President
Madison's secretary of war. There nro
six children, three son and three
daughters, lie died in 1875, and two
years later a marble memorial altar
costing $'200,000 was erected in his
honor in Trinity church. It is esti
mated that his estate won worth at least
$40,000,000. He left f 200.000 to tho
Astor library, nnd largw sums to vari
ous public charities. T every member
of his faiuilv he left a. handsome legacy.
The bulk ol his fortune he bequeathed
to his sons William, and John Jacob,
and tatween them h divided equally
the fortune left him by his father. His
third son, Henry, hud retired to a hand
some conntrv seat en the Hudson, ear
ing little or tu possession of great
William and John Jacob nre thnsleft
the present representatives of the ereat
family nnd fortttne founded by their
grandfather. They are to-dny worth
probably more than $70,000,00;) each,,
nnd their wealth is steadily increasing.
They nre interested in no business nnd
own not a share of stock in any cor
poration. AU their wealth is in real
estate, in this city mostly. They own
block upon block in tho richest busi
ness part of the city, and block npon
block of tho finest brown stone palaces
on Murrnv hill. Their sole business is
hi cnlWt tlipir rents and biiT more
property. They never sell. 'Ibey nr
good landlords; that is, they keep all
their property in the nest of repair,
and are attentive to all the wants of
their tenants. Hut on the other hand
they nre very strict iu tho collection of
rents. Like their father nnd grand
father, they are plain and unassuming.
They live in twin brick houses ou Fifth
avenue, which are plaiu and unpretend
ing in appearance, but spacious and
richly furnished. There is no show or
parade about them. The two brothers
are liberal benefactors of the church,
of various charities, of all public enter
prises of merit, and are liberal patrons
of musical art.
The present John Jacob Astor lias
only one child, William Waldorll' Astor.
He lms figured more prominently bo
fore the public than any other member
of the family. He was graduated with
honors at Columbia college. He served
two terms in the state legislature,
where he was conspicuous as a consci
entious reformer and a painstaking,
intelligent lawmaker. He is now, by
President Arthur's appointment, United
States minister to Home, and may bo
reckoned among tho rising young men
of the ltepnblienn party. He was
married several years ago to a beauti
ful young lady in Philadelphia and has
William Astor hns had four children.
Tho oldest, Mrs. Van Allen, died two
years ago at Newport. The socoud is
now Mrs. Roosevelt. The third is Mrs.
Drayton, aud tho fourth, Miss Carrie,
only "came out" in society last winter.
It w as she who broke down the barrier
between the Astors and the Yonderbilts
by persuading her mother to ac 'ept in
vitations to the famous Yanderbilt fancy
dress ball. She is much courted by the
aristocratic young men of this city and
by ninny scions of tho old world nobil
ity, but as yet her hand ai d heart are
free. She has several times expressed
herself as determined to wed nono but
nn American, and it is understood that
sho does not care much for a fortune as
au appendage to a husband.
t'attenina FowIm' Liver.
Paris Cor. San Francisco Chronicle.
Ducks and geese have to undergo a
very cruel treatment in order to pro
vide us "monsters" with thoe o excellent
foies gras that are found nowhere so
good ns in Paris. The unfortunate am
phibious bird is fastened down to the
lloor of a dark cellar where a high de
gree of temperature is kept up aud is
fed to repletion on a preparation of
oatmeal, barley nnd corn. In a few
weeks its liver attains an extraordinary
size, and then the bird is killed. It is
with this liver that is prepared one
of the greatest gastronomic deli
cacies. These livers sometimes
weigh four pounds apiece. Such livers
readily command from 111) to 40 cents
apiece" for ducks and from 45 to 110
cents per pound for geese. These gi
gantic livers for the most pnrt come
either from the south of France or from
Straslmrg, those from the last nnmed
place being the most highly esteemed.
Somo also come from Austria, but these
do not command such high prices.
The difference in the price between
the livers of ducks and geese is that
the former lose very much in volume
when placed over tho lire and not ou
account of any difference in the deli
cacy or llavor of the dish when made.
An Old Nuertitlon.
A curious story comes from Brent
ford, England. A servant of Dr. Terry
was sent out to carry a message. She
was short-sighted, and failing to return
it was feared she had fallen into the
canal. It was dragged, but without
success. Several days later an old
barge woman suggested that a loaf of
bread in which some quicksilver had
been placed should be floated on the
water. This was done and the loaf be
came stationary at a certain point. Tho
dragging was resumed at this point
and the body found. The superstition is
said to be centuries old, but no one hud
seen it tried there for many a year.
The Trouble of a Trxn Kditor.
j Ijnuzales Inipiirer.
Sickness ut InMne lias left us little
peace of mind. Our foreman has b.-cn
sick all the week, and we had to get up
out of bed to prevent total failure in is
suing. Wednesday came, and our
junior assistant, Mr. Sidney Smith, rose
to the exigencies of the occasion and
worked the press, although it is too
much for his strength nnd size. Our
paper is like a picked-up dinner.
Chicago Herald : A Buffalo man has
gone insane from the contemplation of
the "awfulness of space." His malady
began while acting as night e litoroof a
A ('stored Treacher Defend Wife.
Corn. Philadelphia Times.
Tore is annuder matter wo is noted
for, beating our wives. Now dar do
scriptur cums in agin. De good
book says: "Husbands, keep your wives
iu submission." And how is you gwine
to do dat thing? Why, beat 'em, to bo
sure, 'case dy aeods it. Yea, geiumon,
we is de kings, of tho y earth nnd wo
must rule do women, 'case if we don't
rule them, doy is mighty'' app to rulo
us. Duu, agin,,, wo i the salt of tho
yearth, and w e Is got to keep pretty
sharp to keep do yearth salted. Den,
agin, if you giro a woman an inch she
is more app to take au L. So I 'vises
ynu all to do your duty aud keep tho
women in. hand.
"Now, sisters, I aiat in no wise 'posed
to you when vou don't try to got yond
yourselfs, so 1 will close dis here lec
ture by wishing yott all good luck and
'vising you to devote yonr time, your
eddicatiou uiul your Vomplishments to
us common,, case as I said aforo, we
oro'do kings of the yearth, and you
can't bust that fai' it your tongues are
longer and your heads pretty strong. I
'spects I don' made yo;i sorter mad, but
fucs must be spoken, aud, as I tolo you
aforo, the salt got to bo rather sharp to
keep dis yvartli salted, and it don't do
iu no wise to let de women think doy is
nowhar nigh tho equals of we gommeu,
case dey is monstrous easy to Bpile, and
if dey gets do upper hand dey is more
'au app to keep it.
"I speaks from 'sperlence, and speri
cneo, my frens, brodrcn and sisters, is
a goal teacher, caso if any of yon had
my Eliza Jane for your w ife you could
tell den why I 'vises you to rulo do
women iu do 'ginning, caso, 'fore do
Lord, when doy get do start you had
just ns well try to move a mountain ns
to rulo a woman what you is 'lowed to
got sot in her ways."
The Lower 4'oluiubln lllver.
The scenery nt tho Cascades is very
grand, to the mountain pamorama and
the chlT-lined shores being added the
striking feature of waterfall nnd tho
roaring rapids. Tho water boils and
hisses among rocky masses at tho Cas
cades, and as tho train stops on the
high bauk above wo look down into a
seething caldron of waters, brokou here
and there by uplifted crags, around
which tho foaming currents rush and
swirl, and hero andthero by swift sheets
that pass through occasional channels.
The picture is oue of strange and savago
grandeur. A canal is being constructed
around tho Cascades. It is a vast work,
requiring $5,000,000 or more to com
plete. When finished tho canal will
permit tho passage of river steamers to
tho Dalles, foi tv miles above.
Five miles above Danes City wo
reach tho Great Dalles, a marvelous
gorgo in tho mountain rungo, w here,
sunk in beds of adimantine lava, tho
Columbia passes iu a singlo narrow
channel to the westward. On the shore
of the river nt this season of the year
ono poos nothing but forbidding Holds
of black lava between him and tho fur
ther shore of the rivor. But a short
walk with many a climb over tho rug
ged surface, brings ono to tho brink of
a stream sixty-live feot wido. Tho cur
rent Hows in a narrow cut, close 'to tho
Washington shore, silent, mysterious,
fathomless. To this narrow spnn has
tho mightiest river on tho continont
beeu confined. A boy might fling a
stone across it, yet human ingenuity has
failed to discover its depth. It has been
well said that this is tho Columbia river
turnod up on its edge.
Above tho Dalles the scenery becomos
wild, forbidding, treeloss and savago.
Tho bluffs are truncated cones. Tho
banks are lava beds partly covered with
sand, and above these rise the grim,
wind-worn forms of basaltio cliffs aud
precipices. The Columbia bolow tho
Dallos is picturesque and grand. Above,
it is still wondorful, but almost horrible
in its forbidding grandeur.
Depended on lllinnelf.
Tho Bev. Whangdoodlo Baxter re
cently met ono of the male members of
his (lock, and at onco nddrossed him:
"Why, Mose," he snid, "how stout
yuso gittin'. Yuso gittiu mighty stout
an' corpulent; in mighty fino order, I
tells yer. Dar's nullin' lean about you,
lizzie-ally, but spiritually yuso thiunor
dan a rail. You doan lean on do Lord
"I kiu 'splnin all d it ar," said Mose.
Tow does you 'splain it, Mose?"
"I did lean on do Lord, an' ebbery
Sunday I listened ter your preaching,
an' I got as poor as Job's turkey."
"But how does yer 'splain it? How
does yer Vouut fer do transformation?"
" Why, doan vou see? Yo' furnishes
de 'ligion, an' 1 does my own fatteniu'."
Deceiving (he Home.
"I engaged," said a burly lawyer, "a
chaise at Galway, to conduct me a fow
miles into the country, and proceeded
some distance when it came to a sudden
standstill at the beginning of a rather
steep incline, and the coachman, leap
ing to the groin I, camo to the door and
opened it. 'What are you at, man?
This is not whore I ordered you to
ttop?'" "Whist, yer honor, whist!"
said Paddy, in an undertone. "I'm
only desaving the sly baste. I'll just
bang the door, and the crafty on Id
creature will think he's entirely got rid
of yer honor's splindid form, and hell
be ut the top of tho hill in no time."
A Xew Gaillnic Hun.
Among the most recent inventions in
gunnery is a (iatling gun which can
throw a battery of lo4 cartridges with
effect either upward or downward at
any angle. Not only can a fort or in
trenchment within 3,500 yards bo thus
rendered untenable, but scaling parties,
should they ever bo introduced into
warfare again, nould have a new ter
ror. The new pun is a base-loading
machine, worked by a spiral, and is
now in tho Colt annorv, Hartford.
Tho language of flowers : "You ore
not quite so large as a whole city," said
big sunflower scornfully to an humble
violet. "No, sir," said the violet mod
estly, lowering its head, "I am only a
A CITY OF HOMES.
Philadelphia' Chnrarterlatlr Con-
irnxirn nun inrixmn rrmnrrs-..
A future full of I'romUe.
Philadelphia has the marked pcrul
iarity of being a city of homes. This
means moro than the average reader
will understand. It is not merely a
place of shelter that is homo. New
York has largely adopted tho French
flat system. These can hardlv bo
called homes. They ore economical
contrivances for passing such time as
cannot be put in elsewhere, rood,
sleep, aro the necessities, but the broad,
generous ide of home rarely invades
thoFreio'i flat Tempi r iry shelter is
tho leading idea. And tho influence of
this, in the unhomulike features it pos
sesses, has a molding power over those
who occupy Hats. It is generally con
codod that tho hwk of home sense in
Paris is tho result of this form of life.
Kostaurnnts take tho place of homo as
resorts for food. Unsottled and wander
ing, tho Hat renter leads largoly an out
door life. All this is known, and tho
volatile character of tho French popu
lation is largely tho outcome New
l ork, ns a cosmopolitan citv, is pos
sessed of many traits similar to Paris.
But Philadelphia has entirely differ
cut characteristics. It not only has many
niodorato houses and from theso
through all intermediate grades up to
palatial residences but the number of
artistic, comfortable, roomy houses in
increasing. The fact tlut capitalists
are spending largo sums on such prop
erties proves two tilings: That tho
mass of our peoplo are so improving iu
circumstances as to bo fully able to live
with an approach to luxury; and that
with this all tho comfort of real homos
is domanded. Houses with from eight
to ten rooms, finished in natural woods,
with all modern conveniences, adapted
to artistic furnishing, aud perfectly
iiped and drained, are what are in
largest demand. All this has its evi
dence of the advancing prosperity and
tastoofour people; but it also proves
more than tii.s. The character of a
population is molded by its homos. If
these aro such ns to inspire elevated
taste, and a sense of mental as well as
physical comfort, the population is sare
to advance in nil the elements of thrift.
It is from this standpoint that wo re
gard the future of Philadelphia as so
full of promise. All it gains it keeps.
It is not subject to wido lluctuations.
All its grow th is solid and permanent.
But when people grow iu tnsto, com
fort, the sense of refinement, and so of
intellectual power, it is the best of all.
This is tho marked feature of Philadel
phia. Its advance represents a rising
intellectual griulo. And with rapid
transit, which is a coming- nocessity,
it will show tho finest suburbs of any
city in the world. Along its northern
and western borders, these already ex
ist. But their number must increase
rapidly. Tho soil surrounding this
city is peculiarly adapted to the finest
rural homes. Pnsturago, lawns, gar
dens, and all that adds charm or ad
vantage to rural homos enn bo hnd.
And elegant places, comploto in ap
pointments, will soon bo a marked
feature in tho surroundings of our city.
So with tho poor woll housod, aud tho
bettor-to-do with an approach to ele
gance, nnd grand suburban homss,
Philadelphia will bo Uh great home
Instrnrtloni on How to Fall Asleep.
Cor. Chambers' Journal
I had often noticed that when en
gaged in deep thought, particularly at
night, there eocmed to be something
like a compression of tho eyelids, tho
upper one especially, and the eyes
themselves w ere apparently turnod up
ward, as if looking iu that direction.
This invariably occurred, aud tho next
moment that, by au effort, I arrested
the course of thought, aud freed the
mind from tho subject with which it was
engaged, tho eyes resumed their normal
position and the compression of the lids
ceased. Now it occurred to me one night
that I would not allow tho eyes to turn
upward, but keep thorn determinedly in'
the opposite position, as if looking
down ; and having done so for a short
time I found that the mind did not
revert to the thoughts with which it had
been occupied, and I soon fell asleep. I
tried the plan again with the samo re
sult; and after an experience of two
years, I can truly say that, unless some
thing specially annoying or worrying
occurred, I have always boon able to go
to sleep very shortly after retiring to
rest. There may occasionally bo homo
dilliculty in keeping the eves in the po
sition I havo described, but a deter
mined effort to do so is all that is re
quired, and I am certain that if kept iu
the down-looking position it will be
found that composure aud sleep will be
The Hones of the Dead.
Gerald Massey's Lecture.
From the earliest glimpse we can get
of cavemen wo can see that they clung
to the skirts of their departing friends
and kept such relics as they were . able
to preserve. Tho primary type of
permanence was the bono, and tins was
the first thing that could be saved.
The bones of tho dead were carefully
embalmed long ages before the body
could be preserved", as it was in Egypt
and iu Mexico. The Bushmen, Hot
tentots, Maoris, and other races still
clothe the bones of their dead with a .
coating of red earth. This, as we
learn from Egyptian thought, was a
modo of refleshing tho bones of tho
dead in tho likeness of the living; and
this was the practice of the men who
buried the bones covered with red
ochro in the British shell-mounds of
Before the flesh of tho dead could bo
mummitied it was religiously eaten, and
this was one causo of cannibalism. The
Mosaic and other sacred writings con
tain no annunciation of a mere doctrine
of immortality, and the fact has excited
constant wonder among the uniu
structed. But the subject was not
taught of old as a matter of written
precepts, but as a matter of fact.
"How could vou think of calling
auntio stupid? bo to her immediately
and toll her you are sorry." Freddie
goes to auntie and says: "Auntie, lam
sorry you are so stupid."