The Eugene City guard. (Eugene City, Or.) 1870-1899, May 11, 1878, Image 1

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WHOLE NO. 549.
$2.50 per year IN ADVANCE.
OFFICE-In Underwood's Briclc Building,
ovorCraln' Jewelry Stow. r
oua ONLY
UverU.em.nU inserted as follows:
m. mum. " OT V". UM lnrti011
1vjMi.nt insertion 11. Cash required in advance
J?m. .lv.rtir. will b. charged at the followia.
-ates: '.' '
mewmare three month
m Ana mr
... I 00
,.. oo
... 1 00 aotios. in local column, eanUper tin.
Jt nub insertion.
v Wertwin bill, will be rendered quarterlr.
ill fob wo- mustbersiProeoaPauvKat.
us ITour.-Frim a. m. to p. m.
tftil ..-rives I
? ' u ',Lv7h. mnth I leave. oin north
To . Arrfw. tarn th. north , . . 1 "
... itk t 113 n. n. r omi.iw, t"- - t"
..,1. Cmp Creek ant Browu.vill. at I .
. nl of trains. Utter, ahould be left at tbe emoe
ru. ., bsfore ""'S! PATTEB80S. P. V,
j. tl k V and A
rutliew unit', i-w ...
y-t. flrat anil third Wslnesdays ia e
H.anraa Bona Tdo No. t I.
O. f. MeeU every Tuly evening
nr . VkinaajfJUVWT No.
MMtsra th. 11 and th Wetnwlys in each moa'
Citw. Oreeon.
(Late of the firm of Smith Cleaver, Albany
nnnuoiwrn fiRAKO!? iWE. fir
KVJ W .'in J rm, . . - .
, rfnnr t.i the richt. ud st drs. former!
olti.-eofC. W. Fitch 1
Produce taken in exchange. vtfo
Office on Willamette street, Eugene City.
J. C. Bolon,
J3 33 BT X S T J
OFFICE-In Underwood's brick buildinu,oveij
tlie expivsa ottice.
OIHee n Ninth fttreet, ppoalte the ,
T.harlea lletel, sud tt Healdesice,
Dr J. 0. Shields
J vices to the citiwns of Eugene City and
.,... :.. Snpial attention iriven
nn.ritntIC!AL CASE and UfER-
1E DISEASES entrusted to his care.
Office at the St Charles Hotel
idence when not professionally engaged.
Office at the
Re'l-nee o Eighth street, opposite Preshy
teriaa Church.
Purchasing Agent,
Clocks, Watcnes, Chains, Jewelry, etc
Repairing Promptly Executed.
tarAllWerk Warranted. J3
j. s lc;kby,
Ellsworth Col's brick, Willamette Street
TtTTTX DO WO CHEAPER than any other
If ibwp ia ton.
Wttaew material, nHrouai. Besetting old shoes
i Casta.
All warraate f 1t aatleUetUsi.
Shop on Eightli at, ofposi Ham
phrey's Stable.
JLLgoa, where he respectfully offers his ser
vices to the eitizenU of that place and vicinity
ia all the branches of hU profession.
M and Stationery Store.
City. I have am hand and am constantly
receiving u, amnrtment of the Bert School and
Miscellaneons rVk. Stationery, Blank Books,
Portfolios, Cards, Wallet. B1"0"'
aes, etc, etc A. S. PATTEK6U.V
aH He branches at the old stand, offerinc
tBcreaeed inducements to enstoaaers, old aad
ew. As heretofore, the moat
Careful attention pven to Prescriptions.
iM t wr Vewgbt in Fnfwe, at
ALEXANDER, J. B.-Juntioe of the Peaos
South Eugene Precinct; office at Court Home.
ABRAMS, W. H. & BRO.-Plalning mUl,
sash, door, blind and moulding manufactory,
Eighth street, east of mill race. Everything
in our line furnished on abort notice and
reasonable terms.
BENTLEY. J. W.-Private boarding house,
southwest corner of Eleventh and Pearl sts.
ette street, second door south of A V. Peters
ft Co.
BAKER, R. F Wines, liquors, cigars and
billiards Willamette stree one door north
of St Charles Hotel
BULO.N. J. U Sunricaiand Mechanicall) n
list, Underwood's brick, over Express Offo.
BOYD RENSHAW Meat Marlcet-beef.
mutton, pork, veal and lard Willamette
street, between Eighth and Ninth.
COLEMAN, FRANK Wines, liquors, cigars
and billiards, Willamette street, between
Eighth and Ninth.
CLEAVER. J. W.-General variety store and
agricultural implements, southeast corner of
Willamette and Seventh streets.
CHAPMAN, E. F. Gunsmith repairing
promptly done and work warranted, Eighth
street, between mamette and Olive.
THOMPSON t BEAN-Attorneys-at-I
street, m.. n -
Underwoods brick, Willamette streeioy
VA V HOTTTEN. B. C. -Agent for the
Kritish and Mercantile Imuran re Comkny,
Willamette street, at Express omce.
WINTER, J A. Photographic artist, X
V Ulamette street, riciura wmlcu
finest style of the art, at low rates.
WAT.TON. J. J. AttbmeT-at-Law.
Willamette street, between 8even
Tr-TTTVn J T Ttnekskin dresmna
highest price paid for deer skins, Eiglh
at Bridge.
UNDERWOOD. J. B. General brfcerage
knnneM and wrest for the Coon it In
nnnM ComrjanT of Hartford WilmetU
street, between Seventh aad Eighth.
ofWAP. '6SDrH.
From the Commercial Reporter, May 2.
There was a time when merchant!
acted at party men, but with to much
extravagance, malfeasance and also.
in many cases, unfitness for the post
tion to which eleoted,in public officials,
the temper ol the majority of business
men is being lost and a njore aotive
ioterebt is displayed to elect to office
those whom it is thought will best
perform the duties thereof, regardless
of mend or toe. 1 be coming election
in this State will not be an exception
to this new order, for we look to
more interest being diplayed by mer
cnanta in the securing ot good me
than ever before, as tbey reoogn ce
the very important fact that laws
hare a very great bearing on trade
and commerce, besides a wilful! ex
penditure ot publio funds make more
taxes necessary, and all business is
now laborinc under as heavy a load
of expenses as it can possibly bear.
1 be candidates nominated by the
two political parties for the various
state offices are. with two or three
exceptions, good and exemplary citi
zens, but the well-known act naturally
presents itselt viz., in the private
walks of lilo they may bu all that is
wanted, bui when foisted to office
their knowledge of political economy
or lack ot experience in other ways
may be formidable barrier to a suo
cfosful term of office. 13y taking the
two tickets in comparison we have
the following: For Congress, the
Republicans have placed in nomina
tion Rev. II. K. Hines and the Demo
crats Hon. John Whitcaker. On the
first impulse we were disposed to fa
vor Mr. Hines, but on a careful invea
ligation ot his qualifications we are
convinced that a more upright and
conscientious man should be elected,
for our wants are too many and press
net to be jeopardized by the sending
of a representative to Congress against
whom so many crooked ways are
charged. His competitor, Gov. Whit
eaker, has a reputation for honesty of
purpose that has given bun toe com
pliraentary sobriquet ot Honest John.
A man who makes truth, right and
justice his watchword, will carry
great weicht tor anv measure advo
oiled. Both Mr. Hines and Gov.
Whiteaker are thoroughly informed
on the resources of this State and the
great want to develop the same, so
that in thu respect they are probably
equal ; the ouly difference is in their
For Governor the Republicans
have placed in nomination C. C. Deck-
man, and the Democrats Judge VY.
W. Thayer. The former is very
highly spoken of by those who are
acquainted with him. His qualifica
tions so tar as we can learn, are hon
esty and a faculty tor making money
by shaving notes at a good, round
percentage, or commission, " for
trouble," etc. He has lived in Ore
gon over twenty years, but was never
in the Witleme'ltu valley but ouce,
and then only for a short time, and
cast of the Cascades, we are informed,
he has never been. His dealings are
all south and in California. We
should think, even with superior
qualifications, he is far too ignorant
f the State at large to be its Gover
nor. Judgo Thayei is well known
.i this valley, east of the Cascades
nd also south. His reputation tor
pnesty is second to no one, while his
lalificatioos, and also his knowledge
all parts of the State are such that
y Governor should have.
Ightto be
In, but wbe
liat source i
Pap-Fko Joubnals. Newspapers
exponents of publio opin-
ben wo understand from
the Republican papers in
iis territory mainly draw their sup
rt, this view will admit of a very
aterial modification. To commence
itb we have the Olympia Courier,
e leading organ of the party. This
per is owned by C. B. Bagley, and
same Bagley is deputy collector
internal revenue, for which he
iws a yearly salary of 11600, and
idersno service whatever. Next
be Seattle Tribune, owned by Tom
sch. This man is one of flat es'
il service reform postmasters and
ucka the public teat to the tnne of
11500 a-year. -Nearer home is tbe
Union a sweet smelling journal
edited by Captain P. B. Johnson, re
gister of tbe land office, whosn per
quisitesstealings not counted are
fully up to $2000 a-year. Theae
papers are pr excellence tbe organs
of th Republican parly ia Washing
ton Territory, and all three of them
subsidized. Tbe Great Fried who
usurps a place in tbe white house
early in bis administration issned an
order prohibiting government offi
cials from interfering in local politics,
and yet we bave here three pap-fed
officals installed as the organ grind
ers f the party. Truly a nice speci
men of civil service reform I Bah !
W. TF. StaUman.
I. is said that the spire of Antwerp
Cataedral is vifih'e tt a dif-fsneeof
150 mi!. '
He was a red -nosed wild eyed man
from the head waters of Sage Run,
and lookei as it he had not been in
town since oil was discovered. His
pants were several inces too short for
bim, and he carried half a dozen coon
skins in hi hand.
At the post office he met a South
dlll a a a ...
pmo iaay, ana stopping her by hold
ing me sKins in trout ot her. said
"Can't I sell you soraethig nice to
make a pair of lura out of?"
The lady soreamed, and shot aoross
to the ether side of the street
"Does any ol your neighbors want
to buy anything of tbo kind ?" yelled
tne red nosed man.
The lady screamed again.
"Now, what's the mailer with Han
nor. remarked the red-nosed man as
the lady disappeared in a door oppo
a moment later tne man veered
a .a
into a bank, and threw down his hides
at the cashier s window.
"Got some A. No. 1 coon skint that
I II sell cheap. Not a scratch or
tooth on any of 'em. Ketched every
ft I M
one oi era in a oox irap."
"We have no use tor them, said
the President, politely, as he cast an
oblique glance at the goods.
They'll make you a nice vest," said
the red nosed man. "Two hides Ml
make you a vest, and one '11 make
you a cap that '11 wetr you as long
as you live."
"ily dear sir, replied the Presi
dent, somewhat confused; ''we don't
want hides here. Take them else
where, please."
"Met be your wife would like a set
of furs and these is"
"No, no, no," replied the banker
impatiently, "take the things away,
they aro otlensive. '
"What's that?" said tbe red-nosed
man sharply.
"lako tbe blamed thincs out ol
this," exclaimed the exasperated
hanker: "Thev smell like a slaughter
"I'll take a dollar tor the lot."
"The people next door buy coon
skins." put in the cashier; ''tuke tbem
in there ; take them up town : take
them down town ; take tlitm across
the river : tske them "
' Gimme fifty cents for the lot.
persisted the red-nosed man.
"If you don't get out of this I'll
kick your head off," yelled the infu
riated banker.
"I'll take thirty cents for the six,"
said the red nosed man. "D'ye say
the word ?" and he dangled the bunch
by the tail.
ibe President started for the out
side. Tbe man with the skins started
for tho sidewalk, and after having
reached it, hu paused and said:
"And this is the boasted Oil City,
is it? Gre-a at Godfrey! If seal skin
and sable were selling for a cent a
car loud, the hull town couldn't buy
the sand papered end oi a ral's tail.
Oil City Derrick.
Arrest. Somo
years Jgo,
in a
country not a hundred miles
here, a small sized man went to the
plantation of a gentleman who was
ght in wit, but rather heavy in nesh,
with a piece ot paper in hi band
folded in a legal form and known by
the abbreviation of "ea sa." Having
found tho owner ol the plantation in
the field be explained his business,
when he was requested to read the
cspiasj which commenced as usual
"You are hereby commanded, with
out delay, to lake the body of etc.
"Humph r. says the prisoner,
stretching himself on bis back, "I
am' ready."
"Ob. but you don't expect me to
carry you in my arms?"
"Certainly : you must take my
body, you know. I do not resist tbe
process of the law, understand, but
ubmit with much cheerfulness."
'Will you wait here until I bring
cart ?"
"Can't promise; I may recover
from my fatigue in the meantime."
"Well, what must I do T"
You must do your duty."
And there he lay immovable until
tbe man left.
IIuxtino for Bio Words. The
Newsburyport Herald says that since
Joaquin Miller is going to Europe to
stay, tbey bave a little incident to
relate : A few years ago Mr. Miller
came into tLe Herat d office and asked
the meaning of the word "Cycladcs,"
pronouncing it in two syllables. He
said it was a high sounding work, and
a wanted to use it in a poem he was
about to publish. We gave bim the
meaning and the prononnciation, which
be did not fancy, wereupon we sug
gested "cyclone" and sure enough,
soon after came out one of bis striking
poems, wherein a cyclone was intro
duced as occurring in Oregon.
Il is reported that M. L. Nichols,
of Forest Grove, has fallei heir to
$3,000,000. It comes from his grand
father who owned large plantations
,id Louisiana and 3I ninprn
a . . . -
A story published in iho Fi'..i
sporting journal, Le Sport,-is going
I he round respecting n South Ameri
Can gentlemen a diamond valued at
12,UU0 francs ($3,400). The next
morning a groom found it in the
court yard, and carried it back to its
owner. That personage sent for the
honest groom into his smoking room.
anu snowed lumselt very much
plessed at getting the jewel back
again, lie mid it tenderly in a
drawer of bis toilet table, and tuen
putting his hand in his pocket be
nulled out two cigars, which he of-
terea to the groom. The honest fel
low accepted them, but went off
somewhat discomfited. Ho told the
story on getting home. His master
heard of it and sent for him.
"Have you smoked the two cigars?"
said he. "No, monsieur." "I'll give
you 500 francs for tbem." Will you,
indeed, sir ?" "Yes ; here is the sum-
xou are an honest lad and I am g ml
to pay a premium lor having you m
my service. Now, go back to the
gentleman who owns the diamond
and say to bim, 'Monsieur, I told mv
master of your generosity, but he is
afraid you will deprive yourself ot
the plersure of smoking to day to
make up tor the two cigars you bave
given me. He told me therefore, to
bring them back again."
"May 1 mention the 500 francs.
sir r
At. " '
"Certainly not."
Die servant brought back to his
master the following letter: "My
dear sir; I was very glud to gel back
... a: j i i .... i-i .
iuj umiiiouu. a nave six aiixe, ana
intended to have them set for wais
coal buttons. That is why I wus
so sorry to lose one ot lhen.. A to
the cigar, I can well afford to give
two to your servant, for I have 5.-
000 drying in my seeretaiy. Yours,
with great regard, X. Z." The signer
of this precious epistlo is a bachelor,
and has an income of $40,000.
A Boy's Composition on GiitLS.
Girls is the only folks that has their
own way every time. Girls is ot sev
eral thousand kinds, and sometimes
one g.rl can be like several thousand
other girl ifaho wants todo anything.
Girls is alike one way, they are all
like cats. If you rub 'em the right
way of the hair they'll purr and look
sweet at you, but it you rub in the
wrong way or step on their tails,
they'll claw you. So lonir as you let
a girl have her own way she's nice
and sweet, but just cross her and
she.Il spit at you worse nor a cat.
Girls is also like mules. If a girl
don't want to believe anything you
can't make her. If she knows it's so
he won't say so. Brother George
says he doosn't like big girls but he
does like little ones, and when I saw
him a k.ssing Jennie Jones last sun-
day, and told bim of what be'd said,
be said he was a bung her, cause he
don't like her. I think be hurt her,
for she hollowed and run, and there
was a big red spot all over her two
cheeks. This is all I know about
girls, and father says the less I know
about them the betler off I am.
Has Proved a Failure. -The the
ory uf universal suffrage looks well,
but it has proved a lailure in this
country, remarks thu Albany Knicker
bocker. Look at the Southern Stales,
where ignorance is granted every
political right. Nothing but bank
ruptcy and ruiu has been the result.
Look at our large cities, and you will
find mailers decidedly worse. You
will find a gang of political dema
gogues holding offices, who are doing
all they can to hurry the country on
to bankruptcy and dissolution. Ihene
unprincipled schemers ' get elected
and reelected year after your by
voters who are bought and sold like
in M y cattle. Rings and combina
tions are formed, where plunderin t is
tho role and honesty the exception.
Taxes and debts lave been mcreacsd
until it is almost a curse to own pro
perty. Business ot every kind is
either paralyzed or unprofitable. The
well-meaning people ot the country
have ened "political corruption" until
tbey art hoarse. Their patience is
strained to snapping tension. A
change io our election system must
sooo tke pi see, or there win be a
revolution greater than the world
ever saw a revolution that will shat
ter the Republio from Maine to Cali
fornia. How the whirligig of time sends
politicians from prominence to ob
scurity, remarks the Cleveland Her
ald. There is John A. Logsn for ex
ample. A few months ago his sonor
rous voice filled the corridors of the
Capitol, rod his reverberating plati
tudes and bad grammar shook the
dome and shocked tbe Senate. Re
cently be went back to Washington
as a private citizen to attend the
meeting of the Republican National
Committee, and many people reading
his name in tbe papeis slopped and
said in a puzzled wsy : "Logan ?
What Logan V
As Uncle Remus earns up White
hall street be met a little colored boy,
carrying a slate and a number of
books. Some words paused between
them, but their exact purport will
probably never be known. They
were unpleasant, for the attention ot'a
wandering policeman was called to the
matter by hearing the old man brawl
out "Don't you come looliu' longer
me, nigger. Youur flippin' yo' toss
at the wrong color, You'k'n go roun'
here an' sass the white people, an'
maybe dey'll Stan it ; tut wYn you
come a slingin' yo' jaw at a man w'at
was grey w en de f'amin daysgiu out,
you better go an' git yo' hide greased."
"What's tho matter, old man?"
asked a sympathizing policeman.
"Notbin' boos, 'ceptin I ain't gwyne
ter hnvo no nigger chillun a hopin'
an' a holleriu' at mo w'en I'm gwyue
'long de slreets."
"Oh, well school cbildien you
know how they are."
' Dai's w'at make 1 say w'at 1 duz.
Day belter be home picken up chips.
W'at a niggir gwvneier l arn ouu-n
books ? I ken take a bar' stave an'
fling mo' sense inter a nigger in one
miiiit dan all the schoolhouses betwixt
dis en de state uv Midgtgin. Don't
talk, honey ! With one bar'l stave I -kin
tii'rly lit de vail of ignunce."
"then you don I believe io educa
tion ?"
"Hits do ruination er dis country.
Look at my gal. De ole 'owam sent
'er to school las' year, an' now we
dussent hardly ax 'er for ter carry de
washin home, nhe doot got be v ant
er bizness. I ain't I'arnl niithin' in
books, an' vit I kin count all dc niou-
ey I gits. No use a lalkin' boss. Put
a apellin' book in a nigger's hands an
dur you Icozes a plow hand. I done
had de spe'unce un it." Atlanta
A Great Arid Dksert. Recent
explorations in Australia show that,
in addition to an extraordinary lako
of salt water in the center of the .
country which blights thousands of
square miles of territory in its vicin
age, there is beyond an arid desert of
greater extent than any other in the
world, oo which there it neither
unimal nor vegeatable life to be founcfj
and even ou the borders ol which
nothing but the dryest sage brush
can bo seen. An attempt was in de
to survey this sand and sea ai its sup
posed narrow part, and after travel--
ing 300 miles the camels showed signs
of exhustion, and a return became -
absolutely necessary; hut habitablu
ground was not resetted before sever
al ot these supposed monaicbs of the
Sahara dropped dead. Il is thus
shown that only this western part of
Australia can be utilized as a reluge
for the thousand of Koropeans who1
are seeking homes in the new coun
try, that more than half of the island
continent will not support men or
animlas, and hence that the limit of
population can already bo reasonably
or approximately estimated.
i tit
The Philadelphia Chronicle para
graphs thus: What's become of
Brother Bland? Did he collapse
when the Bill passed? Sergeant
Bales is a bold man, but he is scarcely
bold enough to carry Howe's speech
through the Stale of Wisconsin.
larnsbnrg has but 17 policemen.
This explains why but 1? members
of the Legislature are allowed to go
on a drunk at one time. Despite
the change of water Grant experiences
in his travels his health continues
good. Hayes saw the City of Para
slip into tLe water on Saturday, and
if he lives anothtr year he will see his
Iriend Stanley Mallews slip out of the
Sfiiate. There are over 80,000
ederal office holders in this country,
and tbe' entire work some of them
perform . consist in drinking wliinky
and drawing their pay. J. Madi
son Wells proposes to sue the Times
for libel. Look here, J. Madison, if
this journal didn't say you stole mules
and murdered a man, it is sorry for it.
That pretty Ohio school ma'am
who eloped with Congressman Vance
is entitled to a vote of ihaoks. Any
woran who rids this country ol a
Congressman confers a blessing upon
A Ltino Lovks, "Did I ever love
any other girl ?" repeated a prospec
tive bridegroom, in answer to the
tearful query ol his intended. "Why,
darling, of course n t : how could
you ask such a question r You are
my first and only love. This heart
knew no awakening until the snn-
hine of your love streamed in and
woke it to ecstacy." And then he
kissed ber tenderly, and went home,
and said to biuiself, "I must 'harry
tbem things outer tbe way right off,
or there'll be a row," and the collec
tion bad been crammed into tba
kitchen grate, be drew a deep sigh,
and said to bimselt, "There goes all
that's left of fourteen undyinz loves
let 'era flicker" '
Large orders bave lately been coming '
teTroy, X. Y., from China, for stove.
v: i.
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