Published every Friday Morning
BY ft S. WOODCOCK.
SUBSCRIPTION RATES :
(Pavablo in Advance.)
Per Year ?
Six Months f
Three Months 1 10
rn;rle Copies ? !
Per Year (when not paid in advontq 3 00
All notices rod advertisements intended for pub
atiou should' be handed in by noon ou Wednesdays.
Rates of advertising made known on application.
Miscellaneous Business Cards,
M. S. WOODCOCK,
ttoriiev - at - Law,
CORVALLIS, - - OBEGON.
" b. R. FARRA, M. D,
lliysioian &Surgeon.
OFFICER-OVER GRAHAM, HAMILTON CO'S
Drus Store. Corvallis, Oregon l25yl
t.v bSreeTntoT
Physic: .; t n fc Surgeon.
Office 2 doors south of H. E. Harris' Store,
CORVALLI'-, - - OREUON.
Residence on the southwest comer of block, north
mil west of the Methodist church.
l!):21-vrl.
F. J. ROWLAND,
Blacksmith & Wagonmaker,
Philomath, Oregon.
Mr Rowland is prepared to do all kinds of wagon
ng, repairing and blacksniithing to order. He
uses the best of material every time and warrants
his work. Wg-lyt
W. C. Crawford,
JEWELER.
KEEPS CONSTANTLY ON HAND A LARGE
assortment of Watches, Clocks, Jewelry, etc.
AM kinds of repairing done on short Dotted, and all
work warranted.
Real Estate Agency.
have some very de-:ii able property on the Bay for
ale in lots from 10 to 237 acres. Some of this is
ear the O P. R. R. tei minus. Persons within to
invest will do well to call on me when prices ale rea
soluble. Address with sumps to pre pay postage.
R. A. Bkxsell
New Benton County Or.,
LADIES WISHING TO LEARN THE
Rink System of Dress Cutting
w'U pla se call on me as I am the only
author cd agent in Cwval .
20.11m3 Mrs. W. H. Huffman.
L, J. Hendrichson,
Boot and Shoe Maker,
Philomath, Oregon.
I always keep on hand superior ma
rial and warrant m'v work. I ask an examination
of mv goods before purchasing elsewhere.
iO-32-lyr F. J. Hendrichson.
FOR SA LE AT THIS OFFICE
THE YAQUINA HOUSE!
Is now prepared to accommodate travelers
in first-class style at all hours.
Meals Only 25 Cents.
Horse feed constantly on hand, at the lowes liv
ins rates. Situated on the Yaquina Road, hal way
Iiom CoivadistoNewpoi
20:12yl. p- R ANT-
KELSAY & HOLGATE,
Attorneys - at - Law.
Col. Kelsay and myself have formed a copartner
ship in the practice of the law. The Col's ex
perience at the liar and on the Bench and b:s studious
habits is a sure guarantee that all business intrusted
to us in te line of suits or actions in Court will be
well attended to.
I will continue other business and give prompt
attention to the seme as heretofore. Such as Cl Meet
ing. Being a Notary Public will attend to convey
ancing in all its branches, Deeds, Mortgages, Keal
and Chattel, Leases, Releases, Powers at attorney,
Contracts, &c. &c. Buy sell and lease Heal Estate
both farms and town property, collect rents, ne
gotiate loans, search and examine titles, and a gen
eral agency business.
Ain now in bru-k building and have fire proof safe
for the safe keeping of notes and other valuable
papers left for collection &c.
Office in Burnett's new brick, first door at head of
stairs.
19;l7tf K. HOLGATE.
E. I TAYLOR,
DENTIST
The oldest established Dentist and
the best outfit in Corvallis.
AH work kept in repair free of charge and satis fac
on guaranteed. Teeth extracted without pain by
he use of Nitrous Oxide Gas.
3Titoons up-stairs over Jacobs & Neugass new
Brick Store, Corvallis, Oregon. 19:27yi
qWwoou
To the goat raisers of the State of Oregon:
I am perfecting an arrangement to
handle all the Goat Wool in the
State aud will say to all who
have Goat Wool on hand
PLE1SE SEND ME SIMPLES
from several fleeces, (aveiage) and I will see what can
be done with the same. I dui't expect this year
to be able to only make a start and the price
will be nominal, but will increase the
price and grade from year to year.
State How Much You Have.
Address,
Newport, Or, hm w
r ' 16tf AGENT.
Boots and koesI
Protzman & DeFrance
Masonic Temple,
3rd and Alder Streota, PORTLAND. OR.
THE LARGEST
Retail Boot and Shoe House
In Oregon.
OCCUPYING TWO STORE ROOMS.
Send for Catalogue and
Price List. 21 -m
mtttt
VOL. XX.
CORVALLIS, OREGON, JUNE 15, 1883.
NO. 25.
NEW FIRM!
i6llIH IMPLEMENTS
We have in stock the
Deering Twine Binders,
Deering and Standard Mowrs,
Minnesota Cliiet Threshers,
Morrison Plows,
Minnesota Giant and Stillwater Engines, Elwnod
mounted Horse-Power, Centennial Fanning nill, cel
ebrate.) Buckeye line of Seeders and Drills.
We also keep the celebrated Whitewater and
Ketch tun wagons.
.iune2yl W. H. M1LLHOLLASD.
II . . HAREIS,
One Door South of Graham & Hamilton's,
COKVALLIS, - - OREGON.
Groceries,
Provisions,
DRY GOODS.
Cora.-llis, June 24. 1SS2. 10-19yl
PORTER, SLESSINGER & CO,,
Manufacturers- and ToTlers of
THE CELEBRATED
IRON CLAD
BOOT & SHOE.
These Coods are Warrant
ed not to rip.
All Genuine have the tiade mark "IKON CLAD"
stamped t'.iereon.
117 Battery Street, San Francfsco, Cal.
GOOJJS FOR SALE AT
MAX FRIENDLY' S
Corvallis, Oregon.
WANTED!
lOOO MenandBoys
AT
J.W. HANSON'S.
CLOTHING ANQ TAILORING EMPORIUM
To fit them out in the latest style of ready
made Clothing. Also the finest lot of
Pants Patterns and Suitings
Ever brought to Corvallis.
Call and. Examine Goods.
No trouble to show goods.
Two doors South of Post Office,
CORVALLIS.
. OREGON.
"
THE ST. JOHN
LAND & IMPROVEMENT CO,
Directors :
. P. THOMPSON, P. T. SMITH,
L. A. BANKS, W. BY RON DANIELS,
JAMES T. GRAY.
Office, corner First ami AVagliiilfrtoil Stst
Portland, Oregon.
Capital Stock - $375,000
Parties desiring a safe and profitable investment
should call or w rite for information at once.
Messrs. Buford & Waggaor are agents for the
Company in Corvallis and can give information on
value to persons seeking first-class investments.
20-1 lm2
H
i
i
c
3
3 3
8 El
rr- M
-
c n5
- 9
o cD
fL,.rt
X
fed
C
CO
UJ
CO
CO
J
o
o
CO
0
c
CO
E
CB
ui
C BE xa r"
CQ C2 3
m Tfl O
I "
AT GUST KNIGHT,
CABINET MAKER,
UNDERTAKER.
Cor. Second and Monroe Sts. ,
CORVALLIS, : OREGON,
Keeps constantly on hand all kinds of
FUENITUEE
Coffins and Caskets.
Work done to order on short notice and at
reasonable rates.
Corvallis July 1, 1S81. 19:27yl.
AT SEA.
One does not really ssem ta have
2jot out of doors till he goes to sea.
On tlie land he is shut in by the hills,
or the forests; or more or less housed
by the sharp lines of his horizon.
But at sea he finds the roof taken
off, the walls taken down; he is no
longer in the hollow ol the earth's
hand but upon its naked back, with
nothing between him and the im
mensities. He is in the g eat cosmic
otit-of-doors, as much so as if voy
aging to the moon or to Mars. An
astronomic solitude and vacuity sur
rounds him, his only guides and
landmarks are stellar; the earth has
disappeared; the horizone has gone;
he has only the sky and its orbs left;
this cold, vitreous, blue-black liquid
through which the ship plows is not
water, but some denser form of cos
mic ether. He can now see the curve
of the sphere which the hills hide
from him; he can study astronomy
under improved conditions. If he
was being borne through the inter
planetary spaces on an immense
shield, his impressions would not
perhaps be mnch different. He would
find the same vacuity, the same
blank or negative space, the same
empty, indefinite, oppressive out-of
doois.
For it must be admitted that a
voyage at sea is more impressive to
the imagination than to tlie actual
sense. The world is left behind; all
standards of size, of magnitude, of
distance, are vanished; there is no
size, no form, no perspective; the uni
verse has dwindled to a little circle
of erumpled water, that journeys
with you day after day and to which
you seem bound by some enchant
ment. The sky becomes a shallow
close fitting dome, or eN a pall of
cloud that seems ready to descend
upon you. Yon cannot see or real
ise the vast and vacant surroundings;
there is nothing to define or set it off.
Fhree thousand miles of ocean space
are less impressible than three miles
bound by rugged mountain walls.
Indeed, the grandeur of form, of
magnitude, of distance, of propor
tion, etc., are only upon the shore.
voyage across the Atlantic is only
a ten day sail through vacancy.
There is no sensible progress; you
pass no fixed points. Is it the
steamer that is moving, or is it the
sea? or is it all a dream and illusion
of the troubled brain? "Yesterday,
to-morrov, you are in the same par
enthesis of nowhere. The three ban
fred or more miles the ship daily
makes is ideal, not real. Every night
the stars dance and real there in the
same place amid the rigging; every
morning the sun comes up from be
hind the same wave, and staggers
slowly across the sinister 6ky. The
eye b"comes a-hunger for form, for
pel mai'ent lines, for a horizon wall
to hit up and kep off the sky and
give it a sense of room. One under
stands how sailors become an imag
inative and superstitious race; it is
the reaction from this narrow hori
zon in which tney are pat this ring
of fate surrounds and oppresses them.
They escape by invoking the aid of
the'supernatural. In the sea itself
there is far less to stimulate the im
agination than in the varied forms
and colors of the land. How cold,
how merciless, how elemental it
looks I
GETTING IN AND OUT OF THE ARMY.
Mothers and fathers are constantly
applying to the Secretary of War
for the discharge of their sous from
the army, says a Washington corres
pondent. Secretary Lincoln has
absolute power in this matter. As
a result he has to talk to a dozen or
two agonized parents every day. As
a general rule they represent that
their sons were under the lawful age
when they enlisted. If they can
prove this their sons are discharged.
When they canTt they comrdain lht
it is unjust to hold a young man to
a contract which he concluded im
pulsively in a moment of desperation.
Sometimes it was the result of money
troubles, sometimes of love troubles,
and sometimes of family troubles.
You would imagine, if you heard all
these tales, that this was the popular
method of committing suicide. Most
of our young soldiers appear to have
taken up arms because of a sea of
troubles. In almost every case the
young man is just about to desert.
He sees nothing before him in the
army but the slavish monotonous
life of a soldier without a future. He
sees about him if he is in the West,
as he usually is splendid possibili
ties for a young man. They want
to get out of the army. They want
to gel at the possibilities. So thy
write to their people in the East that
they will desert unless they are ban
orably discharged from the army by
a certain day. Thereupon the half
frantic mothers and fathers and
uncles and aunts flock to the War
Department. The War Department
holds on like grim death to the few
soldiers it has. The army grows
smaller day by day. A year's de
sertions decimate it as a battle would.
They are only 20,000 men in all.
There are dropping out by twos,
threes, dozens every day. The fas
cinating recruiting agents do not
charm enough recruits to make up
for the losses. So the War Depart
ment fights for its soldiers as its sol
diers ought to fight for it. When
they desert they are chased, if
enough soldiers remain in the gar
rison. If the deserters are caught
they are tried by court-martial and
sentenced to two years' imprison
ment at hard labor in the military
prison at Foit Leavenworth, Kansas.
At the expiration of his term of im
prisonment he is dishonorably dis
charged from the service of the Uni
ted States. I would advise young
men to keep out of the army until at
least the army grows better. Per
haps it will never grow better unless
they grow better., and unless mere of
them go into it.
ADVISE ON THE BAYONET QUESTION.
Texas Sif Aa'p.
We perceive in a Washington pa
per that there is some talk in mili
tary circles of introducing a new
style of bayonet into the army. It
is a painful thing to the soldier to
have a new kind of bayonet intro
duced, particularly after he has be
come accustomed to the triangular,
or trowel bayonet heretofore in use.
The short, broad, triangular bayonet
has several advantages possessed by
no other implement of death. After
a hostile Indian, or any other foe of
Uncle Sam's has been bayoneted
with the trowel bayonet, he may not
like it at first, but he never will use
any other kind in h's family. In case
of necessity, the trowel is intended
to be used as au intrenching tool.
If a company of infantry, armed
with the trowel bayonet, is about to
be attacked in a large open prairie,
the soldiers can, in a few moments
throw up a breastwork almost as
high as their heads. Instead of do
ing away with the trowel bayonet,
other weapons that might serve two
or three purposes should be furnished
our gallant soldiers. For turning
flapjacks the trowel bayonet has no
rival. With the ordinary long, nar
row bayonet the soldier cannot pos
sibly turn his flapjack without mak
ing a mess of it. In digging up mes
quite roots for fuel on the boundless
prairies of the West, the trowel bay
onet is a perfect terror, so the sol
diers say. Excellent as the trowel
bayonet is, it might be improved
somewhat. We think a kind of com
bined battle axe and pitchfork bay
onet might be invented. It should
be somewhat after the style of those
table knives made for one-armed
men, with a fork on the back of the
knife, with which to impale the
chunks of beef-steak that have been
cut into by the blade of the imple
ment. A weapon of this kind in the
hands of our soldiers would be very
effective. It is also our opinion that
a combined spade and revolver, a
kind of revolving spade, might be
invented, that would deliver a dozen
shots a minute, and dig np a ten
acre field while ft. is being reloaded,
We have very little practical mili
tary experience, and merely call the
attentiou of General Sherman to
these suggestions in a casual off-hand
sort of way. We do not wish to be
understood as dictating to the mili
tary authorities.
Horses at rest have a normal pulse of
about forty beats a minute; oxen, from fifty
to titty-live beats; and sheep and pigs, from
seventy to eighty. A material change from
these rates may be considered as an indica
ticn of disease.
CATCHING WILD ELEPHANTS
The highest mental faculties are
more developed in the elephant
than in any other animal except the
dog and the monkey. The general
fact that elephants are habitually
employed in parts of India for stor
ing timber, building, &c, shows a
hisrh level of docile intelligence. But
perhaps in no labor in which they
are employed do they display a more
wonderful sagacity than in helping
to catch wild elephants. A herd of
wild elephants is driven into a corral,
and two tame ones ridden in among
them. Two decoys will crowd up
on either side of a wild one, and
piotect the nooser until a rope i.
fastened round the wild elephant's
leg, when the tame one to whose col
lar the other end of the rope is fas
tened, will drag the captive out and
wind the rope round a tree, while the
olhr decoy prevents any interference
from the herd, and pushes the cap
tive to ivard the tree, this enabling
the first one to take in the slack of
the rope. The conduct of the tame
ones during all these proceedings is
truly wonderful. They display the
most perfect conception of every
movement, both of the object to be
attained and of the means to accom
plish it. On one occasion, in tying
up a largs elephant, he contrived,
before he could be hauled close up
to the tree, to walk once or twice
around it, carrying the rope with
him; the decoy, perceiving the ad
vantage he had thus gained over the
nooser, walked up of her own accord
and pushed him backward with her
head till she made him unwind him
self again; upon which the rope was
hauled light and made fast.
One could almost fancy there was
a display of dry humor in the man
ner in which the decoys thus play
with the tears of the wild herd, and
make light of their efforts at resist
ance. When reluctant they shove
them forward, when violent they
drive t bean back; when the wild ones
throw themselves down, the tame
ones butt them with bed and shoul
ders and force them up again, and,
when it is necessary to keep them
down, they knell upon them and pre
vent them from rising till the ropes
are secured.
HOW HIS WIFE MANAGED IT.
When she will she will, and there's
an end on't. Writes the Washing
ton correspondent of the Boston
Traveller : I herd a good story the
other day about, a venerable ex-
member of Congress from Pennsyl
vania, who had been married twice,
and has for his second wife a I'vely
young lady who is extremely fond of
social gayeties. Not long ago she
made an engagement to accompany
a young naval officer to one of the
fashionable balls, and told her hus
band she was going, but neglected
to say she had secured an escort. He
appeared to be pleased, and said he
would accompany her. This was
more than she had bargained tor,
and she resorted to various expedi
ents to get him to stay at home. The
more reasons she gave, the more he
was determined to go. Things were
getting desperate, when a bright
idea struck her. She took the old
gentleman's false teeth and hid them,
and when the evening came he was
still without those necessary ad
juncts to mastication. He wondered
and raved, and raved and wondered,
but it was no use, be couldn't find
them, and finally was obliged to re
main at home, while his wife tripped
g3yly to her carriage, and spent a
most delightful evening.
The Burial Place of Prophets
On the ascent of the Mount of
Olives adjoining the Jewish Ceme
tery, is a plot of ground which has
been preserved to the Jews from
time immemorial as the burial place
of the Prophets Haggai, Zechariah
and Malachi. Hebrews the world
over have been distressed by the re
port that this sacred spot was about
to be sold by the Turkish authorities
to a Christian sect which intended to
build a church upon it. At last ac
counts the completion of the sale bad
been deferred by Raouf Pacha at the
urgent solicitation of the spiritual
heads of the Jewish community. The
intending purchaser is said to be the
Russian Archimandrite in Jerusalem,
and the price agreed upon is 80.
WONG FAT BEWILDERED.
Not long ago Wong Fat's estab
lishment was dazed by the appear
ance of a tall and powerfwJ built
stranger, who was dressed in the
most .frantic attire Loo Fun had seen
in the land of the "red eyed devils."
The wonderfully attired person wore
a fiercely twisted black mustache, a
brown sack coatr an abbreviated pet
ucoat, fong dark stockings and
strong shoes. Betwee he tops of
his hose and the end of his skirt many
inches of bare legs obtruded in a
manner that made Mrs. Wong FatV
mahogney cheek turn a shade darker.
A large stick in one hand and a
bundle under the other completed
the stranger's costume. Having di
vested himself of the bundle, he de
parted, but presently returned on
the jump, aidr seeing Wong Fat in
specting his parcel, emitted a wild
yell that scared Mrs. Wong Fat into
hysterics and set all the dogs ft;r
three block round barking.
"Hi, ther,'" roared the athletic
stranger, "kep yer bans off me duds.
Dinna ye ken, ye haythin, I lef some
thin' in ma purse."
Wong Fat fell back in terror and
the burly stranger took a long wool
en stocking from the bundle, aud
having carefully extracted a ear
ticket from the toe of the "purse"
sauntered off As soon as Loo Fun
recovered his breath he asked ol
Wong Fat:
"Wha' you callee him petticoat,
slockliu', alleesanie woman; mustache
allee same Mefican man. Wha' you
callee him ha?"
"Me no sabbe him him velly big,
velly stlong. Mee thinkee him
stlongee-ruind woman allee same
woman say 'Wha' fo' me no votee.
me no get office me good as man,
anyway; me betta as man; me can
workee like man; me can dink an'
cussee good as man; whe man him be
but fo' me; why me no vote ?' m
The entrance of Scotch in sear h
of his spare picnic collar gave a new
turn to the conversation.
"You sabbee big stlangee man
leavee he' while go ?" inquired Wong
Fat of his distinguished patron.
"Fwhat ! D'ye mane the big lum
niix wid the bigh-wahter pants that
jist went down the shtreet- Why,
ye ignorant idohlathur, that was
Donald Dinne, the famous Scotch
wrast ler."
"Whi him no way him pants?"
"For :he same raysin, I spose, an
Irishman does wear 'em. Because
because look here you squint-eyed
rice aiter, you're ashkin too many
queshtucs."
"Sposc him go out whe wind
blow velly stlong; spose him climb a
tlee?"
"I dod't think he will climb any
threes; it's a long time since he was
caught."
"Spose."
"That'll do wid yer blarney; give
me me collar."
Real Estate AgeiicyJ
corvallis: oregqjT
rWSllB & 1B!B?5J
Real Ratafee- Agents, will bivy, sJ, or
lease frnior farm property ou.
commission.
FEN CLEANING.
A writer in a German paper states
that it is a custom in office in that
country to have a sliced potato in
the desk in commercial houses. He
does not state whether the esculent
should be raw or not, but the proba
bility is that it is not boiled. The
use of the potato is to clean steel
pens, and generally acts as pen-wiper.
It removes all ink crust, and gives a
peculiarly smooth flow to the ink.
He also statesj that the Hamburg
clerks pass new pens two or three
times through a gas flame, and then
the ink will flow freely.
Having made arrangements-' for co-operation
with agents in Portland, and bein hil
ly acquainted, with real property in 1 teuton,
county, we feel assured of giving entire sat
i patronage. all who may ftanrorns with their
G. A. WACiUONEH,.
20-ryl H. J. BteTORD,
The We Job Printing Office
13 PRKPARED TO DO ALL KIND OK WORK KK-TTLT.
SEEDS IN WALKS.
As to the clearing ot weeds frim
walks an experienced gardener states.
"that salS i sorwelintes applied to
sjravel walks and roads in a liquid
state, or in. the form of stueng brine
used quite hot, or as near the boiling
point as possible. This r said to bu
very cf&ctuHl in pevtkt th
growth of' w-ts. Sundry other so
lutions are also recomnw-ndfed fan- the
purpose. But I know of nothihgr
more effectual than a liberal dressing;
of dry salt, sufficient to whiten, thts
entire surface ot the gravek A slight
sprinkling is of little use, and may
even increase Farther than dimish the
evil which rt ks intended to cure. Im
applying such a dressing as has just
been recommended it is, of course
necessary to exercise caution, in or
der to prevent the salt coming n
contact with the grass, box or ether
plants, which may form an edging to
the road or walk operated upon-.
Cause and Treatment of Fainting:
Fainting, in most of its forms, is a
purely natural and philosophical con
dition for which there is a good rea
son. Fainting from loss o' blood is
nature's remedy fo- the bleeding.
The heart's action is lowered; the
blood withdrawn from, the extremi
ties (where, presumidly, the bleeding
is going on) into the larger central
vessels; the patient lies motionless;
there are no struggles to foree the
blood out of the wound; there is uo
pain felt. In a case of tainting, there
fore, from loss of blood, simply lay
the patient on the back a liltlo
turned to one side with the head
low and the wound in a position fav
orable to the doctor's manipulation;
loosen all fastenings and buttons,
about the throat, and then await the
doctor's arrival. Do-nt try to bring
the patient around by deluding him,
with water. Above all give him no
brandy unless by the doctor's orders.
Brandy will end the fainting quick
enough, but it will start the heart afc
double quick time and send the blood
surging through the peripheral arter
ies, breaking down and washing
away any protective plnps of dot
which have probably begun to close
rhe wounded vessels. Iu case of
fainting from shock or from patn the
patient should be placed in an easily
recumbent position, with the head
low and the throat free from pressure.
The forehead may then be bathed
with cold water and brandy cautious
ly administered, or ammonia applied
to the nostrils.
Knew All About It.
A colored man was hanging
around one of the opera houses the
other evening in a manner to show
that he was deeply interested in what
was going on inside, and a gentle
man Anally sal I to him:
"Why don't you go in ? Under
the civil rights bill you can take a
seat in the parquet circle."
"Yes, sah, I knows all 'bout dat,
sab," was the reply. "Under de cibil
right bill I ken take any seat in de
house; but under the present strain
on my finances I couldn't buy two
shingles if hull opera houses war'
selling for ten cents apiece, sah !"
Old newspapers for sale at this office for
25 cents per 100.
Good Grounds for Divorce.
There is a gentleman out west who
has applied for a divorce for good
and sufficient reason. He declares in
an affidavit that while he does not
care to make a more definite charge
against his wife he wonld like an or
der of the court prohibiting the in
discriminate use of the flat iron. He
says that the aforesaid useful imple
ment has on several occasions whirl
ed through the domestic atmosphere
of bis house with alarming force and
such close proximity to his head as to
be very snggestivc. Such is the fear
ful tyranny ot a woman's will that
unless he obeys an order instanter, if
he hesitates a moment to reason
about the matter, this offensive mis
sile begins its gyrations, and skilled
as he is in dodging, he can not hope
to be always successful. Unwilling
to fill a early grave he beseeches the
court to drop a line to bis wife that
there are husbands in the world who
prefer to die of old age. He further
admits that he knew before marriage
that the lady's temper was rather
stronger than a zephyr; but when he
entered the married state he had no
idea that he would as soon be struck,
by a cyclone. JV. Y. Herald.
Never marry a lawyer's daughter.
She inherits the habit of cross-questioning
from her father. Upon the
same principal a man should never
marry an editor's daughter, because
she is almost certain to put a display
head on him.
An old man who had been badly
hurt in a railway collision,, being ad
vised to sue the company for dama
ges, said.- -'Wa'al, no; not for dam
ages. I've had enough of them.
I've had enough of them. Bat I'll
just sue 'em for repairs.