WEEKLY CORVALLIS GAZETTE.
CORVALLIS,
JUNE 55, 1880
WIDOWS, FERNS, AND ROMANCE.
CHAPTER I.
"What possible connection can there
be between these ?" says one.
Is it sarcasm, meaning to insinuate
that those who indulge in romance are
green, like ferns ?
No, my dears; for if it referred to color,
the folly might as truthfully be termed
gray ; and we have all learned that ro
mantic ideas are not confined to the
green age of youth.
It was a lovely day in September that
a party was gathered in the porch of
Rose Cottage, discussing the feasibility
of . a trip up the mountain-aide for ferns
and mosses
If Hi. Norton could go to-day with
them, all agreed that it would be charm
ing. Mi. was their favorite guide, and
an excursion was readily postponed if
there was any hope of having Hi. by
waiting.
Our party was composed of James and
Hannah, John and Maria, pretty gray
haired lira. Bedell (a widow whose sor
row had some time ago reached the pen
sive, interesting stage), JJr. Malbone,
and poor, insignificant 1, that in our
rambles was paired off with Hi.
Liittle did L care, for Hi s "talk was
far more interesting to me than that of
my companions ; such original remarks
and ideas of things as he treated me to,
brimful of natural wit and keenness ! It
was he that first opened my eyes to the
fact that Dr. Malbone was infatuated
with our sweet-faced widow of forty
but neither fat nor fair. fsurely it was
not physical beauty that rendered her so
charming; yet charming she was to all,
male or female, young or old.
James and Maria had each accomp
anied their respective spouses upon their
annual trip to escape' the affliction of hay-
iever, that now common pestilence
The afflicted Hannah and John were
happy to feel that there was one spot at
least upon this earth where they might
find rest and comfort; and their consorts
were content that they were relieved,
though Yankee thrift must have sug
gested to them that it was a moneyed
pity that the hay-fever patients had not
been mated it would have saved half
the annual expense. Thus the innocent
must suffer even in their pocket.
The doctor was taking his annual va
cation of two months, which tells its
own tale, that he was a popular New
York (N. Y.) surgeon, with an extensive
and remunerative practice, who could
well afford to leave his few summer pa
tients to the poorer doctors.
We must tell the whole truth, that the
relinquishment was not as great as seems
at first sight, his practice being among
the upperest tendom ; during the summer
months the best of it might be found at
the mountains, among the lakes, in the
Ganadas, England, Scotland, Ireland,
and Wales, as well as generally dis
tributed over continental Europe and the
Pacific Isles; in fact, for four months of
the year he would have needed seven
leagued boots or a winged steed to have
attended his then widely-spread practice.
CHAPTER II
There was something strange about
the first meeting between Grace Bedell
and Dr. Malbone, though I must confess
that stupid I should never have no
ticed it but for Hi.'s calling my attention
to it.
We six, the two wedded conples, the
widow and myself, had just returned
from a sunset picnic upon the side of
the smaller mountains, and Hi. had met
us at the gate as we returned, to learn of
our plans for the morrow; at that very
moment we discovered on the porch with
onr host and hostess the most noble
ooking man that I ever saw.
A form neither tall nor slender, short
nor stout, but thoroughly pleasing to the
eye, and figure that inspired confidence
at once one of those few forms and
faces that one calls to instinctively for
help, with never a thought of the lack of
previous acquaintance.
Our hostess advanced toward us, say
ing that she would introduce us to "her
annual boarder, Dr. Malbone."
I bowed first, aud then stepped back
ward so that I stook beside onr guide,
Hi. He spoke in a low voice, "Look at
Mrs. Bedell, ma'am." I looked in
amazement; the sweet face was con
vulsed with an agonizing expresssion;
but with a woman's self-control, her
features were calm, though pale, before
the doctor had shaken hands all around.
He bowed gracefully to Mrs. Bedell, bnt
when he raised his head it was he that
was embarassed. He had not observed
her before, and apparently the name was
unknown to him; but the lady herself
had certainly at some time been far other
than a stranger to him.
The old, old story, loved and parted!
The unwritten history of the worldl
Could we "a-bear" to read, even with
one skilled enough to write it?
chapter m.
The constraint at first noticeable be
tween the doctor and Grace, in our free
and easy life soon disappeared entirely;
whether they found opportunity for some
mutual explanation, or concluded to be
friends upon trust, none of us were able
to say;, yet they were apparently friends,
and that knowledge sufficed us.
Nothing is more disagreeable for a
small party than to know that there are
two persons present that yon must for
ever be planning to prevent coming
in contact lest it destroy all harmony.
With us now all was sunny; the doc
tor gallantly cared for the widow on all
our excursions. If we geologized, he
faithfully chipped and hammered each
rock that struck her fancy; if we botan
ized, his middle-agedness appeared no
obstacle to his clambering up to all sorts
of impossible heights, or down to dusky
depths to assist in adding to our lists of
hard-to-get-at-able plants.
If piscatorially inclined; he patiently
wormed her hooks, though it must be
acknowledged he that did join with the
other horrid men in laughing at the idea
of strong-minded, politically inclined
females, requiring one of the sterner sex
to stand at her elbow to arrange her bait
so that she conld catch her fish. He
thought her vaunted independence but
an empty boast.
And then, too, he would say that he
should either have to bring his ether to
soothe the poor fish's agony, as we
landed them so awkwardly, or else
should, in case his conscience troubled
him, complain to some local Bergh.
He would laughingly argue against
onr protest that fish were sluggish and
non-sensitive, and say that woman never
had any mercy upon her game.
To-day it was ferns and mosses, and
the doctor said that he was glad tba our
spoils to-day were inanimate; for we
were so heartless in our pursuit of pleas
ure, it pained him to be a witness of onr ,
unkindness.
heartless, there must be thieves around;
he had suspected Hi for some time, but
he had just begun to think that possibly
Grace was in some danger.
I did not see but their mutual blushes
were just as becoming to them as to
younger lovers for lovers they are most
certainly now, whatever may nave been
their relation in the youth that is forever
left behind them.
CHAPTER IV.
Ferns and mosses well worthy of the
name did Hi. pilot ns to that day. Che
nille moss, more elegant than all the
chenille art ever produced.
Soft, crispy mosses ; soft, velvety
mosses; lichens of all kinds and descrip
tions, upon trunks of trees that looked
sound and rich with verdure, but into
which one would sink untold depths if
they ventured to attempt foothold upon
its treacherous surface.
The lovliest of rock ferns upon boul
ders of tons weight, which rested firmly
against the side of the mountain as if
maintaining their position by mere force
of their rocky will, in opposition to the
laws of gravitation.
How daintily we selected from the
wealth around us, scorning and rejecting
more beautiful moss and fern than we
had ever before seen.
But we forgot that; and, now we had
an opportunity, we were as fastidious as
though to the "manor born." This was
not perfect enough; that was rather
coarse, and yet all of those daintier than
any we had ever saw before; wealth and
good fortune makes critics of us all.
Grace outdid us all in fastidious seek
ing, but even she found that one lovely
cluster of ferns was beyond her power.
The doctor admiringly watched her
perseverance, assisting her until even
with his help she had to acknowledge
she could go no further.
"I thought a woman could do anything
a man could do; how is that ? You have
failed; I will succeed," and he began to
clamber toward the coveted cluster; he
reached it, waved his hand proudly to us,
placed one foot upon a fallen trunk that
was one fairy mound of lichens; as he
turned triumphantly to return, his foot
suddenly sank through, and, without a
moan, he lay as still as death. How to
reach him was the next question. Grace
for a moment nearly fainted ; then, like a
woman, was calm and ready for any
emergency.
Hi's long experience in the woods was
invaluable then.
Following his advice and with his help
the two gentlemen at last reached the in
sensible doctor. It was no slight work
to bear his still form down to us, and
even then there was the greater question,
how to get him home.
No carriage could come through the
forest to us; nothing could be done now
but to bear him forward until we reached
the mountain road, when we could send
forward for some conveyance.
A litter must be improvised from the
boughs of the forest. First, Hi. cut sev
eral limbs from the supple birch; then
took two of the longest, and laying them
side by side a short distance apart he
proceeded with the ever-present Yankee
jack-knife to cut off four short pieces be
sides. He then emptied the contents of
his pockets, and so did John and James;
and never again will I laugh at a man's
propensity for putting all sorts of things
in his pockets.
What should "we have done in this
emergency without those strings, nails
screws and tacks?
Then there was wrapping-twine, large
cord, small cord, and even bits of rope!
Sixpennys, tenpennys, and various odd
sizes; a patent knife of John's proved
equal to a small tool-chest; a nice piece
of granite served grandly for a hammer,
and soon a good slat-bed was ready for a
mattress of ' tammarack," spruce and
fir boughs; the large bags full of moss
made an excellent pillow, and the doctor
was carefully laid upon it, and onr sad
journey toward home was begun; once
the doctor murmured something about
Grace's ferns," and moved his hands
vaguely, as if seeking something.
Then we noticed for the first time tuat
Grace was tenderly caring for the ferns,
for which so much had been risked. The
slender rootlets drooped mournfully, as
if conscious of all the trouble they had
indirectly wrought.
never any apparent danger of being thus
afflicted.
Grace's dearly-purchased cluster was
most daintily imbedded in the best of
chip-dirt, whose surface was concealed
by short, crisp moss, and its edges fringed
with the loveliest bits and varieties of
moss imaginable ; carefully she watered
it each day, and soon we could see that it
really was growing. Grace had imagined
it was for some time, but now the delicate
fronds were expanding, and tiny bits of
baby ferns could be seen peeping their
cunning heads saucily out of the moss,
saying gently, "I'm coming to see what
von folks are all about.
The Doctor and Grace both seemed to
feel that that basket and its ferns was
something a little more choice than any
of the others.
One day they asked us to bring them
each day curious roots and odd-shaped
branches, and the Doctor began the
making of a rustic stand, which was not
finished until the last evening of our
stay. It was a beauty, and the Doctor
proudly placed the mossy bank of ferns
upon it, and told us in a matter-of-fact
manner, that "It will adorn our library
this winter Grace s and mine.
Thus cooly was the engagement an
nounced to the world, and we never
knew a word of how it happened, nor
what had been their previous relation
to each other ; perhaps they thought it
was nobody's business. I shouldn't
wonder in the least ; some folks are just
so odd.
We knew it was no use to "act mad"
because our curiositv was not gratified,
so we cordially congratulated them, and
bade them a cheerful good-by, promis
ing to attend the wedding at Christmas.
The Doctor was not yet quite strong
enough to return to New York, and
Grace was too old to feel prudish about
staying with him after our departure.
Our kind host and hostess were nice
fatherly and motherly people, and would
properly care for the young (?) folks, so
we could leave them without regret.
Urace will return to Boston when the
Doctor's health permits, to prepare for
that wedding.
I have ordered a painting of ferns,
mosses and autumn leaves for my wed
ding gift to Grace and the Doctor.
The Helpless Bivalve.
CHAPTER V.
The doctor proved no light burden,
and the slight help of ns three weak wo
men was gratefully accepted m bearing
him onward, and none hinted that it was
unwomanly or indicative of strong
mindedness. Our assistance was freely
. . . 3, r m
ask and given, regaraiesa oi our iemi-ninity.
The poor doctor was unconscious oi
his helpers, or he might have apologized
for his previous sarcasm at our expense.
At fast the roaa was reaciiea, ana ax.
and John left us; one to go to the hotel
to seek a surgeon, the other to get the
nearest possible conveyance. Dreary
was the waiting, but more so after the
doctor regained consciousness of his suf
ferings. Bravely he exerted himself to learn
what was the matterand he assured us
that he had only injured his knee
slightly; no bones were broken. His
suffering was intense, and it was small
comfort to know that the bones were not
broken.
The doctor from the hotel and the
mountain wagon arrived about the same
time. He verified Dr. Malbone's own
opinion; the knee was badly sprained,
but that was probably the only serious
part of the accident.
He chaffed his brother doctor about
being borne home by the ladies; but to
do this he did not delay placing him in
the wagon, which proved sufficiently
large for all the party; and somehow, I
know not how it was arranged, yet Grace
supported his head during the homeward
drive, and despite his extreme pain he
carefully held those ferns that had cost
so much.
At last we were at home, and Dr. Mal
bone's knee was properly attended to,
but he was told that it would need
careful nursing for a long time.
Poor fellow ! How a man at his time
of life, when sick and suffering, must re
gret that in his youth he did not woo and
win some fair woman to be his bride in
sunshine and his nurse and waitress in
storms !
CHARTER VI.
Didn't we miss the Doctor and Grace
in our after excursions? Yes, we cer
tainly did.
The Doctor was assisted down to the
sitting-room each morning, and somehow
it was very soon quietly understood that
Grace would amuse and care for him
through the day without any assistance.
It was puzzling tnat tney never seemeu
dull nor stupid when we came back at
night. The Doctor made various ' 'forms"
of twigs for ns to fill with chenille moss
and growing ferns, rooted in their own
little velvetv beds of nature's making ;
he did say that the work would be an
i - . . " . M . 1 11 1 A Al
If they had not noticed it already, it is
perhaps unnecessary to inform our read
ers that the oyster crop of the present
season is in several respects better than
that which we have had for a number of
years past. From almost every point at
which these shell-fish are collected re
ports have beep received that the fish are
this year generally larger and healthier
than usual, statements which those who
are at all critical in their tastes must
have had many opportunities of verify
ing. But while recognizing the increased
excellence of the oyster this winter as ah
article of food, we have not been able,
even from those who are directly inter
ested in the business, to obtain any well
defined reason for the admitted improve
ment. Indeed, very few attempt to ac
count for the change, and the only fairly
sensible explanation that we have heard
given is that the sea water was of a
warmer temperature this year during the
months of September and October than
for a number of preceding years. Of
course, this may in no way account for
the circumstance that has been men
tioned, for the subject is one which does
not appear to have attracted the amount
of scientific investigation that it deserves.
In fact, there are several features in re
spect to oysters that do not seem to be
generally known. If information re
ceived from those who are in the busi
ness, added to some slight personal ex
perience, is worth anything, the oyster,
unlike most kinds of fish, improves by
keeping out of the water. Perhaps, how
ever, it ought to be said in explanation
that very few fish can continue to live
for any length of time, after a removal
from their native element, and that dead
oysters lose their virtue quite as quickly
as other fish. But if oysters are care
fully packed, with the bowl shaped shell
underneath, they will live in a temperate
atmosphere for a number of days, feed
ing on the liquid that is confined within
their shells. If they are opened immedi
ately after they are scooped from the
ground, the fish will be found floating,
so to speak, in quite a quantity of water,
bnt if they are opened after three or four
days' proper keeping, this water will al
most wholly have disappeared, while
the fish will be found much richer and
fuller than it was on the first day, the
reason given by oyster dealers for this
being that it has fed itself on the liquid
that had previously been in the shell.
This leads to the remark that the desir
ability of packing oysters in ice is an
open question.
A large number of the best-informed
men in the trade maintain that the prac
tice of putting large lumps of ice upon
oysters in the shell that have been stacked
up, as they commonly are in restaurants,
is a highly injurious one. If the fish are
dead, no doubt this treatment is intend
ed to keep them in a condition to be fit
to eat; bnt if they are dead they have al
ready lost a large part of their excellence
as a species of human food, as they should
remain alive until killed by the forcing
open of the shells. If, however, they are
alive, this application of ice, it is said,
is pretty certain to put a speedy end to
their existence. To the many lovers of
this shell-fish the controversy is one of
no slight importance, and the question
involved should be settled definitely
one way or the other. If. Y. Times.
The Real and Unreal. Those who
get their ideas of French domestic life
from scrofulous French novels will be a
little startled to learn that the widow of
Cham," otherwise the Vicomte de Noe,
the great caricaturist, has killed herself
in a fit of despondency over the loss of
her husband. Probably even in France,
the last place where one would look for
conjugal tenderness and devotion even
to death, would be in the household of
that remorseless and unsparing satirist,
who had for vears been the Nemesis of
French vanity, folly and weakness. But
there is no civilized country in the
world in which domestic affection is so
strong as in France, none in which the
ties of marriage and kindred are so
potent an influence; and the true life of
France is something as different from
the boulevard novel as the true life of
America is different from the dime novel.
Comments.
the
How Bismarck Did Resign in 1877.
It will be remembered that about
tho end of March, 1877, a report was
current that Prince Bismarck had re
signed and that his resignation had
been accepted by the Emperor Wil
liam. In M. Hansen's "Coulisses de
la Diplomatic" the following account
is given of the event: The Emperor
William spent the evening of Thurs
day, the 27th of March, in the house
of Prince Anton Eadzwill, who is
distantly related to the royal family,
and there met tho Count N., who is
also an intimate friend of the Eadzi
will family. "Well, Count," said tho
Emperor, "are you going to dine off
the Easter lamb with Prince Ferdi
nand on Easter Sunday?" "Cer
tainly, your Majesty," replied tho
Count, "unless Herr Falk confiscates
the lamb." "In that case," replied
the Emperor, "you need not be un
der any apprehension for your din
ner." I am, however, not quite cer
tain," replied the Count; "for how
can your subjects feel safe when
even Her Majesty, the Empress, has
to hide her charitable acts to avoid
being annoyed?" "How so, Count?"
asked the Emperor. "Why, sire,"
replied the Count, "the Empress
gave officially 200 marks (about 10)
to tho Ursuiine Nuns who had been
expelled from Berlin; but secretly
Her Majesty sent 1000 marks." En
couraged by the Emperor, Count JN.
cited a great number of other petty
vexatious acts of Herr Falk, acting
according to the orders of Prince
Bismarck. The Emperor, evidently
much annoyed, left early, and next
day he sent for Prince Bismark, who
pleaded ill health. A second mes
senger ordered the Prince imme
diately to appear at the Castle un
less he was so ill as to have to keep
his bed, in which case the Emperor
would call upon him. Prince Bis
marck had to obey, and was closeted
for more than an hour with the Em
peror. On retnrning home, he at
once sent in his resignation. Pall
Mall Gazette.
He wonld Write to their Parents.
hot
firm
curb
Colonel X., of John Morgan's Cav
alry, was not a martinet, but,
bearded like the pard, he had a mill
tary air. Discipline was his hobby
The soldiers ot his regiment were
young men from eighteen to twenty
five years old all of them blue
blooded. To restrain these
spurs required tact, skill and
ness. It was no easy task to
this jeunesse doree. But the Colonc
did it, and this was the way he did it
An inspection having been or
dercd, the Brigadier and his staff
visited the Colonel's camp for the
purpose of conducting it. W hile the
regiment was in line, undergoing in
spection, two privates, who had been
ranging the night before in search of
buttermilk, and had endeavored to
sneak into camp unobserved, were
detected by the outpost sentinels
and brought under arrest to Colonel
X. at the head of his regiment. The
Colonel, cocking his hat on three
grains, sternly ordered them to his
tent to await bis coming after in
spection, remarking to General D.
that he would make an example of
these rovers. Arriving at the tent
with the General and staff, after
ranks were broken the Colonel ar
raigned the culprits before him
"Young gentlemen," said he, se
verely, "you are aware that you
have been guilty of a serious offense
against the discipline ot my campr
"ies, Colonel, was the meek reply.
Well, sirs, thundered the Khada
manthus, "I desire you distinctly to
understand that if
pea ted I will write
about it. Go to
Turning to the surprised officers
looking on, he said: You see how se
vere I must he with these young fel
lows. Discipline must be preerved."
this ottense is re
to your parents
your company
The White Tie.
James facetiously said that if we were 1 aid in keeping off the blues, butthere was
Prof. J. M. Gregory, President of
Illinois Industrial University says:
"Every editor is a teacher, a teacher of
men as well as of children. The news
paper is the freshest of books.
"It is the latest history, the newest
science treatise, the current political
economy, the manuel of the arts, the
text-book of a living philosophy.
"That school-room, other things being
equal, will be brightest, freshest and
most productive in practical learning
ifito which the newspaper penetrates."
A curious account is given of the way
in which Wallujeff, the present Vice
Chancellor, made his entry into the field
of statecraft.
He was an unpretentious young noble
of good parts, but no influence. Once,
at a ball in Moscow, the Czar noticed
one particular young man amongst the
guests. He was the only one who wore
a white tie. The Emperor, who was re
cognized as being incognito, remarked to
him, laughingly:
"You seem to be out of the fashion.
Why is it that all our fellow guests wear
black neckcloths but you ?"
"They are afraid of being mistaken for
servants."
" And you."
"If I am not gentleman enough to es
cape falling victim to the mistake I am
willing to submit to it."
"A wit," thought the Czar.
And he favored the young man in the
white tie for an appointment, which end
ed in his climbing high enough to grasp
the portfolio of a Minister of the em
pire. A "Valuable Device. The Milwaukee
Sun says Sam. Medill has invented a de
vice to prevent market men from palm
ing off old eggs for fresh ones. The
invention is thus described:' He pro
poses to arrange a rubber stamp in the
nest of every hen, with a movable date.
This stamp is arranged with a pad which
is saturated with indelible ink. When
the hen lays an egg, as is well known,
she kicks slightly with her hind leg. An
electric disk is arranged so that her foot
touches it, when the stamp turns over on
to the ink-pad, and then revolves, stamp
ing the date on the egg. The hen then
goes off about her business, the farmer's
hired girl removes the egg, replaces the
stamp, which is ready for another. On
each evening, after the hens have retired
to their downy roost with the roosters,
the date of the stamp is arranged to the
following day, and the good work goes
on. In this was there can be no cheat
ing. You go to the grocery and ask for
fresh eggs, and the grocery man says he :
has some eggs of the vintage of January i
29, 1880, for instance. You look at ;
them, and there are the figures, which
cannot lie. With this method it is an j
object for the man to get rid of his eggs,
knowing that to-morrow may be too late.
The Deep Sea.
Some interesting results of recent deep
sea explorations were concisely stated in
a late lecture at the Royal Institution,
London. Four-elevenths, or nearly three
fourths of the surface of the earth is cov
ered by sea. The average depth of the
ocean is, according to the latest calcula
tions of Mr. Otto Kruminell, about 1,877
fathoms, or something over two miles.
The greatest depth known to exist was
discovered bv the United States ship
Tuscarora, near the Kurile Islands, in the
Northeast Pacific. It is 4,655 fathoms, or
about five miles and a quarter. The high
est mountain existing is of about the same
height as the deepest sea is deep. Mount
Everest is 4,830 fathoms in height. So
insignificant, however, is the total volume
of the land raised above the sea level in
proportion to the vast cavity occupied bv
the aea, that were this cavity emptied of
its water, the whole of the land now
above sea level could be shoveled into it
twenty-two and a half times over before
it would be filled up to the present sea
level.
Nevertheless, the depth of the oceans,
great as it is, is nothing in comparison
with the vastness ot their extent of sur
face. As Mr. Croll has said, the oceans
in relation to their superficial area are as
shallow as a sheet of water 100 yards in
diameter and only an inch in depth. The
sides of the ocean basins are not at all
steep. They are mostly so little inclined
that an ordinary locomotive engine could
run up them in a straight line with ease.
Their inclination is usually not more than
three or four degrees or less. Around
some oceanic islands the slope is greater.
The steepest slope known is at Bermuda,
where there is an inclination of nearly
twenty degrees from the edge of the reef
to 2,000 fathoms. There are no such
things as mountains and valleys on the
deep sea bottom. Animals cannot slip
down against their will into the depths,
but must move deliberately into them,
and travel a long journey to reach them.
The pressure exerted by the superincum
bent water at great depths is so great as
to be almost beyond conception. It
amounts roughly to a ton on the square
inch for every 1,000 fathoms of depth,
aDout 166 as much as the pressure to
which people are subjected on land. At
the greatest depths the pressure is about
four tons and a half. Vast though this
pressure is, it is, however, only about one
eight of that which Professor Abel and
Captain Noble have measured, as pro
duced in their experiments on gun
powder. The deep sea animals, being
completely permeated by fluids, are prob
ably no more conscious of pressure acting
upon them than we, and, so long as they
move slowly from one depth to another,
are most likely unaffected by consequent
changes of pressure.
With regard to the temperature of the
deep sea water, the conditions which
would affect animals are comparatively
simple. Nearly all over the ocean the
temperature at 500 fathoms is as low as
50 F., and this is the case even imme
diately under the equator in the Atlantic
and Pacific Oceans. Below 2,000 fathoms
the temperature is never more than a few
degrees above freezing point,excepting in
the peculiar cases of land-locked seas,
such as the Sulu Sea.
"Collateral."
The other day one of the postoffice bri
gade of bootblacks desired to raise a loan
of eight cents, and after some looking
around he found Little English, who was
perfectly willing to advance the amount,
providing he was secured. The borrower
had no collateral, and in this emergency
the advice of Jack Shepard was called for.
"Easiest thing in the world when you
understand finance," replied Jack. "You
want to borrow eight cents?"
"Yes."
"Well, you hand over the cents as se
curity that you will pay it back."
The two sums changed hands, and the
borrower scratched bis head and slowly
asked :
"How does this come? I haven't got
as much as I had before I borrowed any."
Then the others scratched their heads
and looked puzzled, but Jack suddenly
got the idea.
"It is the collateral business that does
it!" he confidently announced. "It's a
long word and liable to shrinkage, and if
you are only two cents short you've come
out awful lucky. Last time I made a raise
on collateral I" lost fifteen cents off the
dock and a six shilling jack-knife went
over to Windsor on shrinkage!"
A Boy's Trials. To the ordinary lad ,
entrance into society is a fiery ordeal. It
is a great trial, either for a tender or a
riper age, for an over grown boy to go to
a door, knowing that there are a dozen
girls inside, and knock or ring with an
absolute certainty that in a few moments
all eyes will be upon him; it is a severe
test of courage to go before these girls,
and make the tour of the room without
stepping on their toes, and sit down and
dispose of his bands without putting them
in his pockets is an achievement which
few boys can boast. Bat even if he ac
quits himself tolerably well during the
evening, his trials are not yet over. The
girls don their hoods and put on their
shawls, and look so saucy and mischie
vous, so unimpressible and independent,
as if they did not wish anybody to go
home with them. Then comes the pinch;
aud the boy who has the most pluck goes
up to the prettiest girl in the room, with
his tongue clinging to the roof of his
mouth, and crooking out his elbow, stam
mers out the words, "bnau I see you
home?" She touches her fingers on his
arm, and they walk home, feeling as awk
ward as two goslings. Well, life has its
trials.
Burial Lights on tho Adriatic.
It is well known to all travelers, and to
those instructed by them, that many of
the customs of the people of Southern
Europe are very different from those of
the inhabitants of the north, and in many
instances actually startling. Lights, in
connection with death and funeral cere
monies, seem to be a thing of universal
thought and use in Italy as witness the
going among the tombs, in the cemeteries,
on the eve of All Souls, with torches and
every appliance capable of making a flash
of flame. In the picture before, us, how
ever, one of the most startling customs in
this connection is idealize! most beauti
fully. One of the little islands grouped
away toward the Adriatic, from Venice
beyond the Lido, possibly is lying be
neath a full moon; and on a portion of its
beautiful grounds a strange spectacle is
presented, in the variety of lights capable
of being brought into play, and, so to speak,
into rivalry with the orb of night. The
cloudless full moon in the heavens, mak
ing a track of light across the still lagune.
At the landing hare great cressed torches,
irradiating the whole scene, even the
ghostly gondolas of black. In front of the
chapel and its crucifix, these lights and
the additional radiance of several large
candles, fall -on the bier and the corpse ot
a young girl lying upon it, with the offi
ciating priests, the kneeling nun?, and the
mourning friends who stand near and at
a little distance. But even this is not all ;
for still another discription of light is in
troduced, in the illumination of the win
dows of the palace on the opposite shore,
where evidently some high festival is in
progress, making mockery of the silence
of death and the grief in the foreground.
Such variety of lights, by the way,seem to
be more peculiar to Venice than any other
portion even of Italy; for we well remem
ber a certain midsummer-night festival
on that very lagune and the Lido, in which
the full moon, ten thousand lights among
the trees and gardens of the pleasure re
sort, some thousands more on the gon
dolas gliding backward and forward over
the lagune, and all the windows of the
city in a blaze of illumination, were yet
crowned by a few flashes of lightning
from over the Adriatic, making a very
delirium of different rays and radiances".
This realy most striking picture is the
production of G. Amberger, of Basle, who
holds high reputation among German
Swiss painters, is a medalist of the Basle
University, and who studied and worked
for some years among the art schools of
Italy with no little profit, to judge from
the exquisite specimen at once of his taste
and talent thus presented.
Let no one believe that he has done
this picture justice without long and at
tentive study; so many and so instructive
are the details which can not by any pos
sibility be caught in a hurried examina
tion, and so certain is the pleasure to be
found in following out these details with
the care and fidelity deserved by so inter
esting a subject and such conscientious
treatment
Is Mabs Inhabited ? There is no
other planet of the solar system, says
Science for All, which offers so close an
analogy to the earth as Mars. The tele
scope reveals to us the figures of broad
tracts of land and expanses of sea upon
his surface. The duration of his day
and night almost coincides with our
own. His exterior experiences the al
ternating seasons. His nights are illu
minated by two satellites, which present
all the phenomena of our own moon,
and more frequently, owing to their
greater velocity. An atmosphere prob
ably surrounds this planet; in fact, the
existence of air is indispensable to his
other features. Hence, the inference
that Mars is an inhabitable globe ap
pears a very obvious and fair conclusion,
and it wonld be inconsistent to imagine
that this planet, provided apparently
with all the requisite natural facilities
to render life a necessary and desirable
feature of his surface, is a sphere of
desolation, a mass of interest matter,
which, though conforming to the useful
end, is the abode and sustenance of
animate creatures. It is far more in
accordance with analogy and rational
speculatien to conclude that Mars is the
center of life and activity, and that his
surface is teeming with lively beings.
AUGUST
Cabinet
KNIGHT,
Maker,
Bottled Devil. It is strange how
much devilishness a single whiskey jug
will hold. The following is an illustra
tion. In a recent temperance meeting
n Philadelphia, Judge Pierce, one of the
speakers told the following story, the
facts of which were brought out in a trial
n one of the courts of that city:
LiOt me tell you," said ne, "what re
sulted from a single gallon of whiskey,
which to most eyes seemed innocent and
harmless enough. There came out of it
two murderers, two widows, eight or
phans, and two cells in the state prison
filled with wretched convicts for a term of
two vears. The whiskey, moreover, was
iibed in connection with religion. It was
drunk at the christening of a child, and
the men who drank it fought, and two
lost their lives, and the further results
were what I have said. Did not Shake
speaie say well.'O, thou invisible spirit of
wine, if we have no other name by which
we may call thee, let us call thee devil?' "
Armory.
There are two classes who no not bear
prosperity one of them being those who
do not get a chance to bear it.
Washington never told a lie, but if the
gem puzzle had existed in his day we
fear that he might have have said; "Oh,
I've done it lots of times, bnt I can't tell
how just now."
Mock Mince Pies. Four Boston crack
ers rolled, two-thirds cup cold water, one
cup molasses, half cup sugar, half cup
vinegar, one egg, raisins and spices as for
mince pies.
Esse non Videbi. "Gem'len," said
the old man as he got his legs under
him, "a pusson who labors under the
ideah dat he am foolin' de world will
sooner or later git de grand laff. A pus
son can deceive de public for a few days,
or a few weeks, but as soon as de fraud
am exposed he am a gone coon. You
may stand yer hats ober on yer ears,
hang out yer brass watch chains, an'
puff away at yer cheap cigars, but de
majority of men will see right frew yer
like a buzz saw choppin' up cheese.
What we am we am, an' let us b'ar in
mind de solemn fact dat while skim milk
has its value an' its uses, it won't make
ice cream or deceive de babies." De
troit Free Press.
Squire: "Got your eye in mourning
again, I see, Pat." Pat: "Oi have! It's
in mourning for the battle I gave that
brute Bafferty this day!"
JOB PRINTING.
UNDERTAKER,
r
Cor. Second and Monroe Sts.,
CORVALLIS,
OREGOS.
Keeps constantly on hand all kinds of
FURNITURE
COFFINS AND CASKETS.
Work done to order on 6hort notice,
at reasonable rates.
Corvallis. Jan. 1. 1877. I4:ltf
and
Rupture
From a Merchant.
Dayton, W. T., Feb. 10, 1879.
W. J. Home, Proprietor California Elastic
Truss Co., 702 Market street, San Franckco Sir:
The Truss I purchased of you about ono-ear ago
has proved a miracle to me. 1 have been ruptur
ed forty years, and worn dozens of different kinds
of Trusses, all of which have ruined my health,
as they were injurious to my bark and spine.
Your valuable Truss is as easy as an old shoe, and
is worth hundreds of dollars to me, as it affords
me so much pleasure. I can and do advise all,
both ladies and gentlemen, afflicted, to buv any
wear your modern improved Klastic Truss imme
diately. I never expect to be cured, bnt am
satisfied and happy with the comfort it eives me
to wear it It was the best $10 I ever invested in
my life. You can refer any one to ine, and I
will be glad to answer any letters on its merrita.
I remain, yours respectfully,
D. U. Bunnell.
Latest Medical Endorsements.
Martinez, Cal., Feb. 17, 1879.
W. J. Heme, Proprietor California Elastic
Truss Co., 7u2'Market street, S. F. Sir: Jn re
gard to your California Elastic Truss, I would say
that 1 have carefully studied its mechanism, ap-
juieu it iu jjrucuce, ana ao not, nesiiate to say
that for all purposes for which Trusses are worn
it is the best Truss ever offered to the public
Yours truly, J. H Cahothebs, M Dl
Kadarird by a prominent Medical la
st! ii te.
San Francisco, March 8, 1879.
W. J. Home, Esq. Sir: You ask my opinion
of the relative merits of your Patent Elastic
Truss, as compared with other kinds that have
been tested under my observation, and in reply I
trankiy state that lrom the time my attention
was first called to their simple, though highly
mechanical and philosophical construction, to
gether with easy adjustibility to persons of all
ages, forms or sizes. I adil this furthertestimony
wim .-iiwiai pleasure, mat tne several persons
who have applied to me for aid in their special
cases of rupture, and whom I have advised to use
ours, all acknowledge their entire satisfaction,
and consider themselves highly favored by the
possession of the improved Elastic Truss.
Yours truly, Babl .w J. Smith, M. D.
Proprietor Hygienic Medical Institute,
635 California street, San Francisco.
A REMARKABLE CURE.
San Francisco, Oct 28, 1879.
W. J. Home, Proprietor California Elastic
Truss, 702 Market street, San Francisco Sir I
am truly grateful to you for the wonderful CURE
your valuable truss has effected on my little boy.
The double truss I purchased from you has PER
FECTLY CUKED him of his painful rupture on
both sides in a little over six months. The steel
truss he had before I bought yours caused him
cruel torture, and it was a happy day for us all
when he laid it aside for the California Elastic
Tarss. I am sure that all will be thankful who
are providentially led to give your truss a trial.
You may refer any one to me on this subject.
Yours truly, Wm. Peru,
638 Sacramento Street.
This is to crtify that I have examined the son
of Wm Peru, and find him PERFECTLY
CURED of Hernia on both sides.
L. Dsxteb Lyford, M. D.
Surgeon and Physician.
Trusses forwarded to all parts of the' United Statts
at our expense on receipt of price.
Send Stamp for Illustrated Catalogue
and Price LUt
Giving full information and rules for measuring.
California Elastic Truss Co.
702 Market Street, S. F.
HALL'S
SAFE AND
CAPITAL,
THE
Gazette Job Printing House
IS NOW PREPARED TO DO
Plain and Ornamental Printing,
As neat and Cheap as it can be done by any
Office on the Coast.
bill Heads,
letter Head
Mote Heads,
M entente,
P. ogrammes,
tall Tlcfcets.
Invitation
Circular,
Dualues t arda.
Visiting- Cards,
Labels.
Dodgers.
small Pasters,
Knvelapes. -
I. etui Blanks
noses,
nipping Receipts,
Order Books,
Unas,
Taffa.
t ic, Etc
Orders by
mates furnished.
mail promptly filled. Esti-
$15
TO $6000 A YEAR, or $5 to $20 a day
in your own locality. No risk. Wo
men do as well as men. Many make
more than the amount stated above.
No one can fail to make monev fast. Any one
can do the work You can make from 50cts to
$2 an hour by devoting your evenings and spare
time to the business It costs nothing to try the
business Nothing like it for money making
ever offered before Business pleasant and strict
ly honorable Reader, if you want to know all
about the best paying business before the public,
send us your address and we will send you full
particulars and private terms tree; samples worcu
$5 also free: you can then make up your mind
for yourself Address GEO RGii STIN8 )N
CO , Portland, Maine. 16:3 ly I
LOCK CO.
$1,000,000.
General Office and Manufactory,
CINCINNATI, OHIO.
Pacific Branch,
ail and 213 California St., San Francisco.
CHAS. 11. DODD &. CO., PORTLAND,
Agents for Oregon and Washing-ton Ter
II ALL'S PATENT CONCRETE
FIRE-PROOF SAFES.
Have been tested by the most disastrous confla
grations in the country.
They are thoroughly fire-proof.
They are free from dampness.
Their superiority is beyond question.
Although about 150,000 of these safes are now
in use, aud hundreds have been tested by some
of the most disastrous conflagrations in the
country, there is not a single instance on record
wherein one of them ever failed to preserve its
contents perfectly.
HALL'S PATENT DOVETAILED
TKHON AND GROOVE
BURGLAR-PROOF
Have never been broken open and robbed by
burglars or robbers.
Hall's burglar work is protected by letter
patent, and his work cannot be equaled lawfully.
His patent bolt is superior to any in use.
His natent locks cannot be nicked bv the most
skillful experts or burglars.
By one of the greatest improvements known,
the Gross Automatic Movement, our locks are
operated without any arbor or spindle passing
through the door and into the lock.
Our locks cannot be opened or picked by bur
glars or experts, (as in case of other locks), and we
will put from $1,000 o $10,000 behind them any
time against an eaual amount.
THET ABE THE BEST SAFE
Made in America, or any other country.
One Thousand Dollars
To any person who en prove that one of Hall's
patent burglar-proof safes has ever been
1 broken open and robbed by
burglars up to the
(resent time.
C. W. Pool, Traveling Agent.
Office with C. H. i odd & Co., Portland , Oregon
C. B. PARCELLS, Manager, S. F.