Corvallis Gazette.
I
Corvallis Gazette.
PUBLISHED
EVERY FRIDAY MGRKIftG
BY
W. 13. CARTF.lt,
Editor AMD Proprietor.
TERMS:
(OIN.)
Wm
cifbiilli
Per or,
Ms Miiulhi
Ihrco i uml s
g. .'.)
i v
i o
VOL. XVI.
CORVALLIS. OREGON, FRIDAY, DECEMBER 19, 1879.
NO. 51.
RATES OP ADVERTISING.
I 1 W. I 1 M. 8 M, 6 M. lTT.
1 I neu i 10Q 30Q 5 00 8 00 12 OS
2 " 2 00 6 00 7 00 LJ 00 18 08
z 1 3 i i i Mi 1)0 i 22 09
4 " 4 00 I 7 00 18 00 IT800 ao 00
'4 Col. 0 00 j 9 00 I 15 00 I 20 00 I 85 00
a " I 7 0 13 00 i 18 CO 85 00 48 00
' " 10 00 I 15 0 ) 25 00 40 00 80 09
j 00 I 00 I 00 1 00 00 I MO Of
CITY ADVERTISEMENTS.
M. WOOOCCCK,
Attorney and Counselor at Law,
( UXVAM.IS
UKIGKV
OFFICE OX FinST SrRKET.OPI". WOOD
COCK & BALDWIN'S Hardware store.
Specs! attention given to Collections, Fore
closure ofAfuJtjcages, lieul ivitute cases, Probate
and Ilal matters.
Will also uy and seliKity Property and Farm
Lands, on reiwoimlile tonus.
March 30, 1STU. 16-I2yl
CITY ADVERTISEMENTS.
CORVALLIS
Livery, Feed
.AND.
SALE STABLE,
F. A. CHENOWETH.
F. M. JOHNSON.
CHEN0WETH &. JOHNSON,
ATTORNEYS AT LAW
September 4, 1879.
ORIOON
lG:36tf . Mi, in fit., Co vil id. orcuoi
J. W. YBURf6',
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
4 0KVALI.1H, OKlClltX.
OFFICE On Monroe street, between Second and
Third.
CITY ADVERTISEMENTS.
SOL. KING, - Porpr.
jSpecial attention given to the Collection
of Nutes and Accounts. 10-ltf
JAMES A. YANTIS,
Attorney and Counselor at Law,
OK VA I.I.I, - . OKtOOX.
tlf ILL PRACTICE IX ALL THE COURTS
of the State. Special attention given to
piatters in Probate. Collections will receive
bimijit and careful attention. Office iu the Court
fjuae. 16:1 tf.
DR F. A. V NCENT,
DENTIST.
COHVAI.I.IS - ' REGON. I
)FFI0E IN FISH EE'S BRICK OVER
Max. Fiirmlley's New Store. All the 'atest
improvements Everythug new and complete.
All work warranted. Plea-egive me a call.
15:3tf
C. R. FARRA, M. D.
PHYMOIAK AM) HU(sEHt
O
FFICE OVKR ORA1IAM A HAMILTON'S
Drugstore, Corvallis, Oregon. U-26tf
J. R. BRYSON,
ATTORNEY AT LAW.
All business will receive prompt
attention.
COLLECTIONS A SPECIALTY
Corvallis, July 14, 1879. 16:29tf
NEW TIN SHOP.
J. K. Webber, Pro.,
JVT AIN St.. - CORVALLIS.
STOVES AND TINWARE,
All Kind.
fEJf-All work warranted and at reduced rates.
12:13tf.
W. C. CRAWFORD,
DEALER IN
WATCHES,
CLOCKS,
JEWELRY, SPECTACLES, SILVER WARE,
etc. A Ism,
Muslc-al Instruments fce.
?Ar-Repairing done at the most reasonable
rales, and all work warranted.
Corvallis, Dec 13, 1877. 14:50tf
GRAHAM, HAMILTON & CO.,
CORVALLIS ... OREGON
DEALERS IN
Xiiig-s, Paints,
MEDICINES,
CHEMICALS, DYE STIFFS,
OILS,
GLASS
AND
pum.
PURE WINES AND LIQUORS
FOR MEDICINAL USE.
And also the the very best assortment of
Lamps and Wall Paper
ever brought to this place.
AGENTS FOR THE
AVCRIU CHEMICAL PAINT,
SUPERIOR TO ANY OTHER.
aar Physicians' P eicrl pilous Cars
vll (.auiyouaUea.
QWNING BOTH BARNS I AM PREPARED
" to offer superior accouitnodations in the Liv
ery line. AlwaySTeady for a drive,
OOOO TEAMS
At I . w Rates.
My stables are first-class in every respect, and
competent and obliging hostlers always
ready to serve the public.
REASONABLE CHAKUKt FOR HIKE.
Particular attcnliou Paid to Bearding;
n or sea.
ELEGANT HEARSE, CARRIAGES AND
HACKS FOR FUNERALS
Corvallis, Jan. 3, 1879.
Uclyl
Woodcock & Baldwin
(Successors to J. R Bayley A Co,)
TTEEP CONSTANTLY ON HAND AT THF
old stand a large and complete stock of
Heavy and MiHf Html ware,
IRON, STEEL,
TOOLS, STOVES,
RANG 8, ETC
Manufactured and Home M.ule
Tin and Copper Wai-o,
Pumps Pipe, Etc.
A good Tinner constantly on hand, and all
Job Work neatly and quickly done.
Also agents for Knapp. Burrrll & Co.,
for the sale of the best and latest im
proved 4
fA-RM MACIirNEnY.
of all kinds, together with a full assort
ment of Agricultural Implements.
Sole Agents for the celebrated
ST. LOUIS CHARTS R 0 KS 0VES
the BE8T IX THE WORLD. Also tha
Norman Range, and many other patterns,
in all sizes and styles.
tfa5 Particular attention paid to Farmers'
wants, and the supplying extras for Farm
Machinery, and all information as to such
articles, lurnished cheerfully, on applica
tion. No pains will be spared to furnish our
customers with the hest goods in market,
in our line, and at the lowest prices.
Our motto -hall be, pmnipt and fair
dealing with all. Call and examine our
stock, before going elsewhere. Satisfac
tion guaranteed.
WOOKCOCK & BALDWIN.
Corvallis, May, 12, 1879. 14:4tf
LANDS I FARMS! HOMES
1HAVE FARMS, (Improved and uniro
nrniHul STORKS anrl MTT.I. PRflPl'PTV
very desirable,'
FOR SALE.
These lands are cheap.
Also claims in unsurveyed tracts for sale.
Soldiers of the late rebellion who have, under
he Soldiers' Homestead Act, located and made
final proof on less than 160 acres, can dispose of
the balance to me.
Write (with stamps to prepay postage).
R. A. BENSELL,
Newport, Benton county, Oregon.
16:2tf
ALLEN ft WOODWARD.
Druggists
and
Apothecaries,
P. O. BUILDING. CORVALLIS, OREGON.
Have a complete stock of
DRUGS, MEDICINES, PAINT?, OIL,
GLASS, ITJ., ETC.
School BooksStationeny, Ac.
We buy for Cash, and have choice of tbe
FRESHEST and PUREST Drugs and Medie:ues
the market affords.
W Prescriptions accurately prepared at half
the usual -rates. 2Mayl6:lStf
FRESH GOODS'
AT THE
BAZAR -FASHIONS
Mrs. E. A.. KNIGHT.
CO EVALLI8 , ... OBtOOL
Ha just received from San Francisco, the larg
est and Best Stock of
Millinery floods,
Dress Trimmings, Etc.,
Ever brought to Corvallis, which I will sell at
C prices that defy competition.
Aaroaey r rel taale
Patterns.
26irl8:17tf
Corvallis Ladre So 14, r. 4t A. M.
Holds stated Communications on Wednesday on
or preceding each full moon. Brethren in good
standing cordially invited to attend. By order
W. M.
Bar a am lade No. 7, I. O. O. F.
Meets on Tuesday evening of each week, in
their hall, in Fisher's brick, second story. Mem
bers of the order in good standing invited to at
tend. By order of N. G.
ROBERT N. BAKER.
Fashionable Tailor,
PORMERLY OF ALBANY, WHERE HE
has given his patrons perfect satisfaction,
has determined to locate in Corvallis, where he
hopes to be favored with a share of the public
patronage. All work warranted, when made
under his supervision. Repairing and cleaning
prompt iv attended to.
Corvallis, Nov. 28, 1878. 15:48ft.
Grain Storage !
A Word to Frmers.
TTAV1NG PURCHASED THE COMMODI
ous warehouse of Messrs. King and Bell,
and thoroughly overhauled the same, I am now
ready to receive grain for storage at the reduced
Rate of -L ets. per Bushel.
I am also prepared to Keep Extra, White
Wheat, separate from other lots, thereby enabling
me to SELL AT A PREMIUM. Also prepared
to pay the
Highest Market Price.
for wheat, and would most respectfully solicit a
share of public patronage. T. J. BLAIR.
Corvallis, Aug. I, 1878. 15:32tf
FRANKLW CAUTH0RN, M. 0.,
PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON,
Corvallis, Oregon
Special attention given to surgery and diseases
of the Eye. Can be found at his office, in rear of
Graham, Hamilton Sc Co.'s Drug Store, upstairs,
day or night.
June 3, 1879. l-23tf
H. T3. XI A.TTT,
One door South of Graham A Hamilton'.,
CORTALLM, OM6H,
GROCERIES
PRO VISIONS,
AND
Dry Goods.
Corvallis, Jan. 3, 1878. J6:lvl
DRAKE & GRANT,
MERCHANT TAILORS,
COBTAI LIA. - - - OBKUOk.
XTE HAVE JUST RECEIVED A LARGE
and well selecU-d stock ot Cloth, viz:
"VV:s of w I ami lload
, lotliB, 'rencli aspilni'-rcsi,
- eotch I'we.Mlsi, and
American i ultltr
Which we will make up to order in the most
approved and lash enable styles. No pains will
be spared n producing good fitting garments.
Parties wishing to purchase cloths and have
them cut out, will do well to cull and examine
our stock. DRAKE & GRANT.
Corvallis, April 17. 1879. I6:16if
Boarding and Lodging.
Plilloaiatli Benton Co . tlrcfua.
GEORGE KISOR,
"RESPECTFULLY INFORMS THE TRAV
eling public that he is now prepared and in
readiness to keep such hoarders as may choose to
give him a call, either by the
SINCtE MeAL, DAY. OR WEEK.
Is also prepared to fan ah horse feed. Liberal
share of public iialionage solicited. Give ra a
call. GEORGE KISOR.
Philomath, April 28, 1879. 10:18tf
Albert Pyoauj.
PYGAIX 3
ir.TjiAM Irwin.
WIN,
City Trucks & Drays,
T-TA V1NG PURCHASED T1IF. DRAYS AND
Trucks lately ownfd by James Eglin, we
are prepared to do all kinds of
City Hnu Inir. i ell-v ri it of
Wood. In to.. K'C,
in the city or country, at reasonable rates. Pat
ronage solicited, and satisfaction guaranteed in all
easesT ALBERT PYGALL,
WILLIAM IRWIN.
Corvallis, Dec. 20, 1878. 15:51tf
J C. MOB ELAND,
(city attorney.)
ATTOR.EY A.T LAW,
rirwTr!T? AinnnctMi' Rrick. First street.
htwn Morrison aud Yamhill. 14:38tf
THE STAR BAHEBY,
aia Street, Corvallis.
HENRY WARRIOR, PROPRIETOR.
Family Supply Store !
Groceries,
Bread.
Cakes,
Pies,
Candies,
Toys,
Etc.,
Always on Hand.
CorTftllia, Jan. 1, 1877. H:2tf
Buffalo Bill on tbe Utea.
Born upon the Western prairies, and
reared among wild scenes of tumult, his
father murdered in their early days,
when Kansas, with the struggle of a
young giant, was shaking off the yoke of
African slavery, a trained Indian fighter,
taking his first scalp at the age of 12,and
having served his young State in earliest
manhood as a trusted and honored mem
ber of the Legislature, it is probable
that William P. Cody is as well ac
quainted with all that pertains to the
West as any other living man.
A question of growing importance and
of serious import just now to the people
of the United States is the management
of the Indians by the Government. The
conversation turning upon that subject,
the Commercial representative said:
"What are your ideas on the Indian
problem, Mr. Cody? In other words.,
what would you do to secure a better
and mofe economical management of tha
Indian tribes by the Government?"
"I think I can sum up my policy in a
single sentence. It is this Never make
a single promise to the Indians that is
not fulfilled. Agents promise too much.
Men of calm, prudent determination
must be sent among the Indians as
agents. Those who are sent often know
nothing of the Indian character, and
either through fear, ignorance or dis
honesty are led into making promises
which the Government cannot, or will
not fulfill. Every Indian outbreak that
I have ever known has resulted from
broken promises and broken treaties by
tne government.
"What do you think of the peace
policy or the policy of encouraging
agricultural pursuits by the Indians,Mr.
Cody?"
"It has already resulted in good, and
will result in still greater good if honestly
and intelligently pursued. You cannot
make an Indian work by standing over
him with a shotgun. He must be taught
that it is to his interest to do so, and
brought into it by degrees. Too much
cannot be accomplished all at once. But
if a wise, firm policy is pursued, the In
dians will gradually drift into agricul
tural pursuits."
bpeaking of the recent outbreaks of
the Utes, Mr. Cody said that he thought
the Indians were badly treated. He
knew that for years miners, contrary to
treaty, had been settling upon their
lands. The Utes pretested and the Gov
ernment paid no attention to them, and
they had finally taken the latter into
their own hands. Mr. Cody had been
with the Fifth Cavalry for six years, and
he was consequently well acquainted
with the Utes. He had taken the first
scalp to avenge the Custer massacre.
On the same day he also killed Keel
Knife.
"What do you think of Grant as a
third term candidate, Mr- Cody?"
"Next to myself, 1 think Or rant is the
luckiest man in America. Nothing would
surprise me."
"How did jrou get the name of 'LSunalo
Bill,' Mr. Cody?"
In lcst7, when the Kansas iracihc
road was being built, I was in the service
of the Government. One of the
managers of the road came to me and
said the men were out of meat, and asked
me what I would contract to furnish 25
bnffalos a day for. I told him I was in
the service of the Government and could
not work for him at any price. The
company, however, made an arrange
ment with the Government so that I got
off, and he hired me at $500 a month to
shoot bufialos. I thought $500 a month
was the biggest salary any man ever re
ceived. I went to work, an J in 18 months
I killed 4280 buffalos. The 'Paddys' em
ployed on the road, as a consequence,
became very tired of buffalo meat.
When they saw me coming they knew
my appearance heralded a fresh supply
of tough buffalo meat and they said, one
to another, 'Bedad, here comes Buffalo
Bill again; sharpen up your grinders,
we'll have more buffalo meat now." I
soon became known along the entire
line of the Kansas Pacific as 'Buffalo
Bill. Toledo Commercial.
A Singular Story from Hartford.
The story is told of a Hartford gentle
man who lost $100 in bills, and remem
bering that he had the money last at
his butcher's, went there to learn that
just after he had left a man came to the
shop to make a purchase. He felt in
his pocket as if he had lost something.
Then looking down he saw a roll of bills
on the floor, tricked it nn and counted it.
There was just $100, and from it he paid
for what he had just bought. A week
later the second person returned the $100
to the first, with the following explana
tion, On the day referred to he had
been out to Windsor to collect some
money, and in his haste to return to
Hartford, thrust it, $100 in bills, as he
supposed, into his vest pocket. When
he went into the market above referred
.to, he .naturally felt for his money, and,
missing it, looked around for it, and
saw the roll on the floor, which he sup
posed was his own. He had used it
during the week, and only that day had
he put on his workfng coat. While at
work he wanted a match, and in feeling
through the pockets of his coat to his as
tonishment he found the $100 he put
there instead of into his vest pocket. As
soon as possible he went to the market to
see if any one had lost that sum of
money, and this led to a general settling
all around. He did not know at the
time that he had been suspected of the
theft, and did not imagine that he was in
danger oi arrest,
It is not a very pleasant thing to go
througn the world without sympathy,
and to meet only those who have no
interest in us, except to make us con
tributors to their welfare and their sel
fish ends. In marriage, as it should be,
there is no selfishness. Each member
works for the other's good; each eon
tributes to the other's welfare. In the
outside world it is different; each seeks
to use the other for selfish purposes, and
this makes life a contest, a battle. If
such a state were to prevail in the home
and married relation, then marriage
would so far be an evil, and not a
good.
How I Escaped Suicide.
I had resolved to kill myself; there
was no longer any doubt that Amelia
was faithless to me.
Let me be sure about it was it Ame
lia her name was? To think that she
once held my life as it were, in her
little hand, and I can't(jecollectj to
save my soul, what her name was.
Anyhow, whoever she was, she had
proved false to me, and. as I was very
young at the time, I had promptly
come to the resolution to destroy my
self. My first intention was to go and
blow out my brains all over her stair
carpet, but then reflected that every
one wonld know that Henrietta come
to think of it, her name was Henrietta
had infatuated me and turned my
head. "No," said I to myself, "no
publicity, no scandal! Let me imitate
the wounded stag, which, seeking to
liide its fatal hurt, betakes itself to the
secret thicket, there to perish far from
all human eyes."
II.
In this elegiac disposition I took the
5:10 train for Melun, which sat me
down just at dusk within a few steps
of the Golden Lion, a very well kept
inn, with clean beds and a capital ta
ble. "What will monsieur have for sup
per?" said a charming little mistress.
"Nothing supper would be a mock
ery. Show me to my tomb my room,
I mean."
I retired to my couch, but not to
sleep. In my fevered dreams I beheld
Victoria I am confident it was Victor
ia after all passing, leaning upon the
arm of my hated rival. I clutched at
his throat and seized the iron railing
of the bedstead, or the marble slab of
the little table by my bedstead. I rose
unrefreshed, but what matters that I
was about to die ha! ha! to die.
Having dressed myself, I went in
search of a rope. You may think that
when a person wants to hang himself
nothing is easier than to hnd a rope,
but I had to hunt the hotel, high and
low before I could find one.
"What on earth do you want of a
rope, monsieur?" said the pretty little
mistress when finally she found me "one.
With the precious bit of hemp in my
pocket, I took my way towards a thick
et not far from the hotel, in a little
wood whose paths were familiar to me.
There was one lonely and gloomy copse
there where 1 well knew my lifeless
body would swing for weeks ere it
was discovered.
LTL
Upon the road I thought of Bertha
I was wrong before; come to think of
it, it was Bertha and cursed her with
all the bitterness of which my soul was
capable. I then tested my cord. It
was not such an agent of sell-destruc
tion as I would have chosen had I had
an assortment from which to make a
selection. It seemed to me both short
and not up to my weight. I was an
noyed. You cannot tell how a trifle
like that will affect a person's temper at
such a moment.
A further disappointment was m store
for me. On arriving at the spot I had
selected in advance, I was disagreeably
surprised to find some one else there.
An individual whose back only I could
see, was occupied in fastening a rope
to the most eligible branch of my tree.
"Hello! what are you doing there.'
I cried.
He turned round. "What business is
it of yours, anyway?" he said.
"Bah: dont you think l know what
you intend doing?
"Well, and supposing I want to hang
myself it is my own funeral suicide,
I mean.
IV.
I regarded him narrowly. He was
a handsome and manly young fellow of
about my own age, with a frank and
winning countenance. He was deadly
pale.
. "This young man," said I, lifting my
hands to heaven, "is going to take his
life his own precious life, all for the
sake of a worthless jilt."
"Sir!" he cried.
"Poor silly fool," I went on com
muning with myself aloud, "he would
undertake to defend her. All lovers
are the same. Will you," I continued,
"take my advice the advice of a well
wisher? Just leave that cord there, (it
was a stouter rope than mine, I had
observed,) and go quietly home like a
good fellow, When you are yourself
you will thank me for having given you
such good advice."
He shook his head gloomily. "I de
sire to die," he muttered.
"Don't let yourself be goaded into
taking a step that if you were alive
you would regret to-morrow." I went
on with a benevolent persistence (yon
see, the fellow had pre-empted the only
really eligible bough in the wood)
"When you are dead it will be too
late to change your mind."
"Yon speak to me without knowing
what misfortune has happened to me,"
he said.
"I can guess it."
"No, you cannot guess it: Sir, a
woman that I loved ; a woman for
whom"
And he went on to tell me his story
which, singularly enough, was precisely
like mine. The coincidence made me
pause a moment to collect my thoughts.
V.
"I see," said Charles (he had told me
in the course of his painful story that his
name was Charles), "that your silence
justifies me."
"By no means," I cried. (You will
observe that it wouldn't have been digni
fied for me to abandon at once my former
position on the subject of suicide.)
"There is nothing, whatever, in all that
yon have told me to justify yon in taking
your life. Come, my friend," said I, be
coming really interested in his case,
"come, let us reason the matter out.
Why should you complain because you
have been unfortunate in love? Don't
you know what the poet says ?
The lot of girls was to deceive
Since winter first was snowy.
"Women have been false to their
lovers from all time; women will be false
to their lovers to all time."
"But no woman has ever been so false
to her lover as this woman has to me."
"Lots of 'em have."
"No; none could be."
"But I tell you thousands of 'em have.
I know one whose conduct towards to
wards an intimate friend of mine was .
Why should you kill yourself because
one petty woman has played you false ?
Seek another one a prettier one."
"In vain, in vain," he groaned; "she
was the only woman in the world that I
cared for the handsomest woman in all
Paris, sir."
"Oh bosh! I know of a hundred
handsomer and more tender than she
ever could be, You may think in the
first moments of soreness that there are
no other women in the world, but in a
month from now you'll be prepared to
admit how silly it was to entertain such
a thought."
VI.
My eloquence seemed so convincing
and my position so sound that it was a
pleasure to me to listen to myself. I
went on.
"What good will it do you to hang
yourself? Tell me, if you can, what
useful purpose will be subserved.
Either the woman has a heart or she has
not. If she has no heart"
"She has none none."
"Of course she has none. Therefore
your death will only be agreeable to her
will only flatter her. It is a big adver
tisement for a woman to have a man kill
himself on her account. What will the
public say the boys. They'll say,
'Charles was an ass a silly ass.' Yes,
Charles, everybody will say you were a
silly ass, and everybody will be right in
saying so."
I waxed eloquent; in point of fact, for
some moments it had occurred to me I
was arguing my own case, pleading for
my own life. I heaped fact upon fact,
added argument to argument with such
earnestness and closeness of reasoning
that my friend Charles at last fell into
my arms and cried, "You are right, you
are right bid me do whatever you
would and I will obey you."
"All right," said I, "let us go and get
some breakfast."
VII.
I brought him back to the Golden
Lion. I was terribly hungry,
The table at which we seated ourselves
was neatly seat, and aided one's appetite
by its snowy linen, its glittering glass
ware, its golden-brown loaves, its yellow
butter.
When a thick and juicy steak with
potatoes had been served up to us,
lapping our prisoned nostrils in the
elysium of its appetizing odors and stain
ing our knives with its vermeil essence,
and we had tasted the first class of some
remarkably particular Bordeaux, we
were rapturously silent, but our speak- j
ing eyes said nay, shouted,
"Well, life isn't such a bad thing,
after all."
"If I hadn't met yon," said Charles,
reaching across the table to squeeze my
hand.
"If I hadn't met him," I thought, as
I returned his cordial grasp.
"It was the most remarkable piece of
luck I ever heard of," he continued; "I
don't suppose that a human being goes
through that copse twice in a month.''
I remained discreetly silent.
"But, I say, you know," he went on,
as if a sudden light had flashed upon
him, "what were you doing in that
lonely part of the wood at that early
hour of the morning ?"
I could not help blushing guiltily.
"You were going to hang yourself,
too."
"I was upon the very same tree.
Here's the rope I had in my pocket."
"The best joke I ever heard of," said
Charles, as we clinked our glasses.
Adapted from the French for the New
York World.
How a Rich Man Got His Will
Cheaply. A millionaire who lived and
died in the vicinity of this city, as he
felt his last days drawing nigh, sum
moned a distinguished neighbor and
lawyer, who since has occupied one of
the highest positions in the gift of repre
sentatives of the people, to prepare a last
will and testament. When the will was
drawn the man said: "I propose to make
you my executor, and I shall require no
bond from you. Write that, also." The
ex-Judge complied, after thanking his
client, and promised to execute the will
to the best of his ability. "What is
your bill for drawing up my will?"
asked the millionaire. "Oh, under the
circumstances, of course, I shall' charge
you nothing," was the answer. "But,"
said the other, "than is not the my way
of doing business. Make out and receipt
a bill for your services and I will pay
yon now." "Well, since you insist, I
will make out a bill for a nominal sum
say $25." And this member, who seldom
draws a breath without charging some
one for the respiration, made out and re
ceipted for $25 a bill which, under other
circumstances, would have been $500.
The good mad died and was buried.
When the will was read it was found
that the name of his son had been in
serted in the place of that of the distin
guished lawyer. The ruling passion is
strong in death. The man who knew
how to accumulate wealth understood
the valne of a tightly drawn will and the
difference between $25 and $500. He
had merely copied the words in the
order they were written by his legal
friend and thus obtained an irrefragible
will at small cost, and an executor of his
own choosing. Cincinnati Gazette.
Irate landlord (and Free-Kirk elder,
before being called in for the fiftieth
time about some repairs) : "The fact is,
Mrs. McBacket, ye'll never be content
till ye're i' the hoose made wi 'out hands."
(Severely): "See Second Corinthians,
fifth chapter and firrist vairae, Mrs. Mc
Racketr ...
.wiices in Local Column, 20 cents per Una.
eacb iDserttun.
Transient advertisements, per square of 12
lines, Nonpareil measure, 82 SO for first, and SI
for each subsequent Insertion In ADVANCE-
1., gat advertisements charged as transient.
ard must be paid for upon expiration. No
cti-.rpe for publtt her'a affidavit of publication,
Yearly advertisements on liberal terms.
Pi ixessional Cards. (1 square) $12 per annum.
Ail notices a id advertisements intended for
publication should be handed in by noon on
Wednesday.
' French Titles.
A conversation is supposed to take
place between a newspaper reporter
and an old baron, a French edition
of Sir Bernard Burke. The former,
wishing to know the reason of the
multiplicity of titles, of which every
Frenchman appears to possess one,
calls upon this baron of the old re
gime, who lays down to him the law
upon titles, a law which Frenchmen
all transgress: I am not astonished
at your surprise at the immense num
ber of titles in France, and I am de
lighted to give you soine particulars.
To begin with, you too easily con
found gentleman (Gentilhomme) and
nobleman. God makes the gentle
man, and the king makes the noble
man, so that nowadays the creation
of noblemen is impossible. Eveiy
gentleman ia noble; but, on the other
hand, a nobleman of recent date,
without ancestors, however high his
title may be, is not a gentleman, nor
can he ever become one; his grand
son will be the first gentleman of his
line.
The French titles of nobility are
Dtic, Marquis, Comte, Vitcomte,
Baron, Chevalier, Ecuyer and Vi
dame, Since 1816 these last have
fallen into disuse. Prince is not a
French title; it is only the generic
name given to members of the Royal
family and to such old sovereign
families as the Bouillons and the Bo
bans. The exceptional appelations
of Prince de Conde, Prince tie Conti,
Prince de Joinville and Prince de
Lambelle only prove the rule. The
titles ot Prince de Marcillac, Prince
de Broglie and Prince de Sagan are
foreign, and are merely borne by
courtesy, the only exception being
Prince de Sagan, whose title was au
thorized by Napoleon III.
The head ot a family alone has a
right to a title, whatever it may be.
Alt the other members of the family
have no right to it or any other save
by special decree, as in the c se of
the Oramonts, the Talleyrands, the
Rohans or the La Rochcfoucalts, as
the marquesite does not derive in any
way from a Dukedom; it is contrary
to all heraldic rule for the sons of a
Duke to take the title of Marquis
during the father's life time. This
is, however, constantly done, and as
sons of Marquises, Earls and Vis
counts take the title immediately be
low tb borne by their father; this
accounts for the numberless titles
one meets with in France. But, I
repeal, no child has a right during
his father's lifetime to bear his title
or one inferior to it, even by adding
his Christian name. At the father's
death the eldest son only inherits his
title, his younger brothers having
no right to a title of any kind. If
this rule was strictly observed our
aristocracy would be select indeed.
The imperial noblesse has tbi-eo
titles only due, comto and baron;
all the others are merely borne by
courtesy. In all timos absurd usur
pations have taken place, but at no
time have abuses been more flagrant
than during the present Republic.
The Due de Broglie during his ten
ure of office as garde de sceaux tried
to put some order in the matter, and
issued on the 22d ol July, 1874, a
ministerial circular, but from the first
it remained a dead letter.
In this causerie the writer only
speaks of those who, belonging to
good families, think they have a right
to the title they bear; but there is
another numerous class of persons
who, taking the name of the town or
the village where they were born,
or, again, putting their Christian
name after their surname, gradually
usurp any title to which they aspire.
I will take a fictitious example. A
Lefebvre is christened, let us say, St.
Hilaire, then L. de St. Hilaire, until
one day his visiting cards unblush
ingly give him forth to the world as
Marquis or Comte de St. Hilaire.
Probably the old Baron would have
classed such a person outside the pale
of honest men. London Life.
WIT AND HUMOR.
The quarantine letween Texas and
New Orleans is so strict that the papers
are not interchanged.
Not one Boston insurance company
can show a profit on the business of the
first six months of 1879.
A tinker named Todd publishes a tem
perance paper, and has sued a contempo
rary for calling him Todd-y.
The preservation of life should be only
a secondary concern ; the direction of it
our principal. '
The silver vase presented to Henry
Clay by Whigs is offered for sale in Bos
ton by his grandson.
The Treasury Department estimates
that since July 1st, $5,000,000 in specie
has been imported into this country.
If the women of this country would
get along without ribbons, they would
save $14,500,000 per year to help the
men purchase cigars.
Aminidab says that when his mother
chastises him he cannot help but feel
that there was something underhanded
about it.
They couldn't find a glass in the
place, so they drank out of a funnel.
This accounts for their acting so fnnn
ley after emptying it three or four
times.