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MART. V. BROWN,
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BUSINESS CARDS.
s. a. jonxs,
ATTORNEY AT LAW,
ALBANY, OREOOX.
7-Offloe In the Court House."VS
-8n2tf.
W. G. JONES, M. D.
Homoeopathic Physician,
ALBANY, OREGON.
v7o20yl.
r. a. c ,TB-
"Corvallis. - I'inn Co
CHENOWETH & SMITH.
ATTORNEYS AT LAW,
Corvallis, Oregon..
SfOrrrct at the Court House. v6o27
JOI1X J. WIIITXKY,
ATTQMEY 1.XD C0OSEL0H AT Un
and Notary FMc.
Special attention given to collections.
Orrica Cp stairs iu ParrUu's Brick.
Albany, Oregon. v3n33tf.
JOXES & HILL,
PHYSICIANS & SURGEONS
ALBAXY, OREGON.
OrrrcK -On South aide of Main street, over
rayton's store. vsn-ai.
A. W. GAMBLE, 31. D-,
FHISICUS, SUEGEOX ASD iCCOUCHEn,
ALBANY, OBXGON.
Offlcr and residene- two doors east of Mealey's
"Furniture ltooms, First suvet. vSn3J.
T. W. IIAItniS, 31. u.,
PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON,
ALBANY. OREGON.
tar omce on Main street, over TumMl's
Rrsidenc on Fourth street, lour block w.-st of
Court House. - vanlisyi.
W. C. T IV Ei'DALE.
DEAI.EH IJJ
GROCERIES, PROVISIONS.
Tobacco, Cigars aid Yankee Notions,
ALBANY, OREGON.
I will strive to keep on hands the best of ev
erythimru iny line; aud to merit public pot
roUe. vsmtyL
J. W. BALDWIN,
ATTORNEY & COUNSELOR AT LAW,
Will practice In all the Courts In the 2d, 3d
and 4tu Judicial Districts: in the tsupreme
Court of Oregon, and iu tee United State Dis
trict and Circuit Court. u:Bce up-stairs in Iroiit
room iu Farnsu,s brie bioc. Viral tel.. Albany,
Oregon. snMtyL.
GEO. R. HELM,
ATTORNEY AND COUNSELOR AT LAW
Will practice in all tbe Courts of this State.
OFFICE : ALBANY, OREGON.
Nov. 11, 1879.
ST. CHARLES HOTEL,
CORNER FRONT AND WASHINGTON 6TS..
ALBANY, OREGON.
H. S. LUB01S. - - PROPRIETOR.
This bouse is the most commodious In tbe
. T.hlp KuDDlied with the best the market
Kurds. Free coach to the aouse. Sale lor
-valuables, vunce oi uun wu. ou.- uijjbu; .
n. BCLLISGEB. TBKO. BCRSESTBB.
BELLINGER & BURMESTER,
ATTORNEYS AT LAW.
No. 89 First Street,
PORTLAND, - - OREGON.
Special attention given to matters in Bankrupt.
7 and all business in Lotted elates Courts.
v6n24tf.
G. F. SETTLEMIER,
.Druggist and Apothecary;
DEALER IX DRUGS, MEDICINES, OILS'
Paints, Window Olacs, Dyeatufis, Liquors,
l'Hcy Soaps, Brushes, Perfumeries, Ac.
f reicriptioni Carefully Compounded.
AU art eles and Drugs io oar liae wan anted
of tbe best quality.
First street, Post Office building, Albany.
jull5v5n48yl
COMMERCIAL HOTEL.
OPUA HOUSE BLOCK, 8 ALEX, OREGOW.
SIRS. A. J. Ill ELY, Proprietor.
Tills house will be kept in first class order, and
with attentive and obliging servants.
tt Chinese Cooks Employed.
"I am prepared to furnish good accommoda
tions to the traveling public, and will use every
' endeavor to merit the patronage of the public.
Regular boarding at very low rates.
Tree Coach to tie House.
. V8n27tf.
ALBANY BATH HOUSE!
THE UNDERSIGNED WOULD RESPECT
fully inform the citizens of Albany and vi
cinity that be has taken charge of this Establish
ment, and, by keeping clean rooms and paying
atrict attention to business, expects to suit all
those who may favor him with their patronage.
Baring heretofore carried on nothing but
First-Class Hair Dressing Saloons,
be expects to give entire satisfaction to all.
Cbildien and Ladies' Hair neatly eat
and shampooed. jusisru VEiitft,K.
T3n33tf. ,
SOMETHING NEW IN DENTISTRY !
DIt. E. O. 83IITH, DEI5TIST,
HAS LOCATED IN ALBANY
and has tbe new invention
In plate work, which consists in
inserting teeth In the mouth without covering
the whole roof, as heretofore. It gives the
wearer the free use of the tongue to the roof of
the mouth in talking and tasting. It is the
.Smith k Purvioe patent.
-Teeth extracted without pain. Plates
jnended, whether broken or divided. Office one
.door east of Conner's Bank, np stairs.
v7n4Stf.
WIMiAMETTE
TRANSPORTATION COMPANY.
-fJIROM AND AFTER DATE UNTIL, FUR
tj tber notice, the Company wiil dispatch a
boat from Albany to CervaUU on TUESDAY
ad FRIDAY of each week. -
Also will dispatch a boat from Albany for
Portland and intermediate places on same days,
leaving Cometock A Co's wharf.
Fare at reduced rates. J. D. BILES,
Dee. 16,1871. Agent.
VOL. VIII.
WOOING. BOTH, WINNING NEITHER.
"Well, I delare P ' j
Miss Chirrup was always "declar
ing !" might be eaid, indeed, to bo
in the Indicative Mode. Declare, wo
may add, in her idiom, was a verb in
transitive, unless the note of admira
tion with which Bhe invariably fol
lowed it, might be taken to be its ob
ject.
KVell, 1 declare! ' said Jliss uuir
rup, in a shrill whisper.
"Did you ever" replied Miss Chirk,
in another.
It was lwollin West's will that the
two were discussing. It was very
brief and explicit.
"I bequeath ray entire estate, real
and personal, to my niece, lluth Mor
gan," with date, signature, and attes
tation, was all there was of iu
The Misses Chirrup and Chirk were
too distantly related to the testator to
have eulertained any considerable
hope on their own accouut. A iri
liiug reminder, in deference to family
etiquette, was as much as either had a
right to expect. But that Kollin
West should have left his whole for
tune to one ot his nieces, to the ex
clusion of the other, whom everybody
had supposed to be his iavorite, took
more than Misses Chirrup aud Chirk
by surprise.
Mr. West had teen, for many years,
a widower. His children had all
died in infancy, and a couple of or
pan nieces, cousins to each other, and
reared under his roof, constituted his
household. That his large fortune
would be left to them equally, was a
point people took for granted ; but
should any discrimination be made be
tween them, uobody would have hesi
tated to say it would b in favor of
Millie Granger, her uncle's pet, whose
blithesome smiles he had been wont
to call the sunlight of his life.
Millie's loving heart was too full of
sorrow at her uncle's death, and in
gratitude for his kindness in by-gone
years, to leave room for any feeling
of reproach at his last unaccountable
act, which the Misses Chirrup and
Chirk so earuestly protested against.
An elderly maiden aunt came to
live with the two young ladies, and
the household remained uubroken.
Except the changes caused by the va
cancy in their home, tbe lives of lluth
and Millie continued as before.
It was not till the cousins had re
sumed their place in society, that Mil
lie began to notice the difference
made ai her altered prospects. It
was Hulh now, not herself, that was
the centre of attraction.
To be rid of the common herd of
fops, and be no longer pestered by
their silly flattery, Millie felt M as a
thing to be thankful for. Dut uhen
Orville llyors turned his back upon
her, and joined the ranks ot her
cousin's admirces, she must have been
other than a woman not feel it.
Mr. Kyors was the pet beau of
Billingdale. Handsome in person, ac
complished in manners,' and of fasci
nating address, he was not one whose
attentions were likely to prove dis
tasteful in any quarter, and when they
were directed toward Millie Granger
in a manner sufficiently marked to ex
cite no small degree of envy, we need
not be surprised if, .instead of repel
ling, she just a little encouraged them.
It would have required a closer an
alysis than Millie had ever made of
her feelings, to show her how little
she really cared for Mr. Byors, ud
bow much she cared for Arthur War
ren, whom she had known and liked
since they had played, and sometimes
quarrelled, together, in childhood.
But Arthur's self-examination had
gone deeper. He devotedly loved
Millie, and knew it. If he had never
said so outright, it was from motives
of delicacy, prompted by the differ
ence of their positions. She was a
prospective heiress; he. was without
fortune, and void of expectations, save
those whose realization depened on
himself.
Having never spoken out, it may
be that Arthur Warren bad no right
to feel aggrieved by the attentions
paid by Mr. Byors to Millie. He
should have remembered that young
gentlemen who have nothing to say
for themselves, are not privileged to
stand in the way of others who have.
But Arthur was not reasonable.
was not even candid. He quarrelled
with Millie on the scores ot Orville
Ryors, without a word of explantion
as to what concern it was of his, if
she married that gentleman the next
day.
Now Millie was a girl of spirit.
She not only refused to decline Mr.
Ryor's attentions at the unwarranted
dictation of Arthur, but received them
with rather more encouragement than
before.
People began to say it would be a
match soon, and it might have been,
bad not Millie's uncle died. For Mr.
Ryors, as we have said, was a very at
tractive person, and Millie bad not
sufficiently scrutinized her heart to be
aware that ber chief interest In him
sprang from the pleasure of having
triumphed where so many others had
failed, and a disposition to assert her
own independence.
. When Arthur Warren left bis na
tive village without so much as call
ing to bid her good-bye, Millie cried
a little without well knowing why,
and that evening went to a ball with
Orville Ryors, and was among the
gayest of the gay. It is very likely
she would then and there have accept
ed Mr. Ryors, had he said the word,
just to show how little she cared for
Arthur Warren.
The grief that Millie ,felt at her
uncle's death for a season overshad
owed all other thoughts. But when
time, at length, bad so tempered her
sorrow that her life began again to
flow in its accustomed channel, it was
with not a little chagrin that Bhe be
held tbe man whose attentions had
been lately so devoted to ber that
people began to couple their names
significantly, turn aside and follow
ber fortune instead of herself.
.Millie knew now how little sne bad
ever cared for Orville Ryors; but
would others understand it? The
thought stung her past endurance.
And the meanness of him who thus
humiliated her, scarce exceeded, in
her eyes, that ot her cousin Ruth, who
permitted, iustcad of spurning his ad
vances. In the bitterness of her heart, Millie
resolved to quit her cousin's abode,
and make her way to the great city,
trusting that where so many live,
there must be many ways of living.
Borne of which would bo open lo her.
She had been liberally supplied
with money during her uncle's life
time, and had husbanded enough lo
meet the expenses of her journey, and
for a time, defray the expenses of liv
ing. So, one day, without a word to
any one, she secretly packed her
trunk, caused it to be conveyed to the
railway station, aud took tho train for
New York.
The day and night her journey last
ed M as one of alternate hopes and
misgivings. At times she wouin have
fain turned back ; but when she
thought of the jeering tongues behind,
her eyes would flash through her
tears, and though her lips quivered,
her heart would again become firm
aud resoulte.
Millie hail never seen the city be
fore. Its din and bustle confused her.
Surrounded by importunate hack
men and hotel runners quick to per
ceive her inexperience, Bhe found her
self at last, without her own volition,
seated in a carriage whose driver un
dertook to convey her lo tho Kick
shaw, the best house in the city, he
assured her, though it had not a very
inviting look, Mille thought, as the
carriage stopped in front of it.
"Your fare, Miss," said the driver,
jumping down "five dollars, you
know."
It was not the extortionate de
mand that brought a troubled look
over the girl's face. Putting her hand
into her pocket, she found her money
had disappeared. She searched every
where, but in vain. She had doubt
less been robbed in the crowd alter
leaving the train. Millie tremblingly
explained '..er situation.
"That dodge won't do!" said the
driver.
''No, it won't do !" added a frowzy
looking clerk, , who made his appear
ance just then. "We cau't lake peo
peojile at the Kickshaw that have no
money, you know."
"It's a rank swindle, an I'll call a
pTteeman !" exclaimed the driver.
A crowd began to collect. The
frightened girl sobbed and glanced
appealing!) from one coarse face to
another without encountering a single
look of sympathy.
At this instant the driver and the
clerk, who stood together close to
the carriage door, found themselves
simultaneously collared and thrust a
considerable distance asunder by a
ri"ht and left shove from a pair of
vigorous arms.
"Millie Granger!" exclaimed a voice
that brought the blood back to the
maiden s blanched cheeks.
"Arthur Warren!'' was all she
could answer.
"Well, I declare!" uttered a snrill
voice none other than Miss Chir
rup's, who, without Millie's knowl
edge, had come to live in the city, and
who chanced to be passing at the
time.
Matters were soon explained, and
Miss Chirrup, who had the kindest of
hearts, invitel tier relative dome with
her; aud Arthur, hauiug paid the
driver his just due, called another car
riage and escorted tho ladies to their
destination. He called round that
evening, and spoke his mind to Millie.
And Millie found out she had always
loved him. And Arthur explained
that it was only the difference in their
former prospects that had kept him
silent. And Millie said she wouldn't
care to be rich if it wasn't for his sake
And Arthur said he was glad she
wasn't rich, and added that he was
earning a salary that two could live
on comfortably. And, in short, the
two lovers were perfectly happy.
Ruth Morgan's anxiety at Millie's
sudd-n disappearance .had been re
vived by intelligence of her safety,
and Ruth was in high spirits wheu
Mr. Ryors called, determined, this
time, to bring matters to a crisis. He
had more than once tried the plan of
gradual approaches. On tbis occasion
he resolved to come directly to the
point, aud had actually gotten half
way on bis knees, when xtuth said,
quietly:
"Don't be too hasty, Mr. Ryors ;
you may regret it."
"There is but one thing I can regret
your refusal."
"My uncle's will " Ruth began. "
"I know it left you all . ho had," in
terrupted the gentleman; "but that is
nothing to me. ,
"And quite as little, I assure you,
to me? said Ruth. "When his will
took effect, my uncle had nothing to
leave."
The kneeling process was suspend
ed midway, and Mr. Ryors remained
in a very uneasy, and not altogether
graceful posture, while Ruth contin
ued : " ' "
, "My uncle had some time before
made a deed, you see, conveying bis
entire estate in trust for the benefit of
my cousin Millie, reserving only
life interest to himself."
Tho binges of Mr. Ryors' knees
suddenly uncrooked.
"Good good-morning, Miss Mor
, he stammered.
"Good-momms, sir," said Ruth,
bursting into a ringing laugh when
the discomfited suitors oacK was
turned. ,
"It shall never stand !" said Millie,
when she and Ruth met. a few days
later. Your claims on our uncle were
as good as mine, and the property
shall be equally divided."
, - "Don't trouble yourself, little one,"
said Ruth. "Before Uncle Rollin
provided for you, our aunt, by an un
derstanding between them, settled
her fortune on me. "" - '
"But that will of uncle's " ' '
"Was made to save you from a fortune-hunting
husband," replied Rutb.
. ALBANY, OREGON, FIUDAY, MAY 2, 1873.
from tho lli'inlil's Hiilem Corivsuundi.-noe.
T1IK MUKDEIt.
The ! Ctnftrene Meachnm's t
crtptlun ortlia JUaunrr :itt. dark's
HHr.l TraaeUerjr f the Indlans-The
JUunlvr of Uin, Canity sail lir. Thomas.
Salem, April 23, 1873.
It is probable that wo shall never
know, in exact detail, the full history
of the Modoo war. The suddenness
of the attack and the rapid succession
of tragio events inevitably perplex
the memories of eye-witnesses, and
throws over tho crimson lettering of
that day's work perhaps in charity
the blot ot hopeless coulumou.
And yet enough is known to ive us
the memorable picture of that solita
ry sage-brush lire iu the gray desola
tion of those accursed lava-fluids,
around which are disposed a unique
group of persons, representing the
antipodes of mankind. There sits
Cunby, the stately and trophied war
rior, whose life is a chronicle of our
advancing flag too noble of mind
and true of heart to harbor a thought
of treachery; and by his side is Dr.
1 homas, every feature illumined by
the Christian l'uitti that is iu him,
hopeful ot great things this day, and
trusting all else to God. Further on
are Commissioners Meacham and Dy
ar, resolute still to stand by the orders
of tho Government, but feeling now,
at last, in their souls, the chill of an
awful doubt. Opposed to them sit
Captain Jack and his chosen accom
plices sullen, taciturn, and apparent
ly indifferent, but watchful of every
nove ! x hero is soinnllniiir in iheir
dark, stolid faces which their victims
might read, but they cannot, and it W
loo late if they could ; it is the blank
inattention of minds made up the
ennui of fixed resolution, impatient
of everything but the denouement.
An April sky, serene and sweetly
blue, benus abovo t lit in, aud ilia glo
rious sunlight pours over the crests
and caves of that disheveled wilder
ness of rock, a silent and resplendent
sea of gold. There is suddenly the
quick, exultant utterance of tho pre
concerted signal ; the cra-.li of mur
derous shots ; the leap of those agile
fiends through tho smoke of the tire,
their tawny faces red-lttten with un
utterable paxsion; and then an odor
of blood recks up, aud the heart is
sick.
Your correspondent, through the
courtesy of Mr. A 11. Meacham's fam
ily, is enabled to lay before the read
ers of the lltrald his account of the
dreadful affair, in which he received
nearly mortal hurt, from which ho is
now as it Mere, from the red bor
ders ot death creeping slowly back
to life.
ilK. MKAtUAM's STORY
is fuller, more detailed, and, in some
respects, different from any yet yiven
to ihe public. After a few prefatory
remarks he says :
Finally, through Bogus Charley and
Boston, arrangements were made on
Friday morning to meet them that
day at noon. Gen. Canby. Dr. Thom
as, Agent Dyar, and myself. M ere to
meet Jice unarmed Indians at Council
Tent (one mile beyond the military
lines and within the lava-beds).
BOGUS CHARLEY
ale breakfast at my table, and seemed
very sanguine of an adjustment of the
whole matter that day. Frank Riddle,
and Tobia Riddle, his Modoc wife,
our interpreters, called me to one side
before starting and said : "Meacham,
don't go; they Mill kill , you." This
warning was repeated to Gen. Canby
and Dr. Thomas. Mr. Dyar and my
self protested against going, but, ow
ing to the proximity of the troops
and tho utter recklessness of any at
tempt upon our lives, it was decided
to go. Dr. Thomas remarked that be
did not believe that God had sent
him to do so noblo a work with such
an end in prospect, and that ho would
go to the council. Mr. Meacham
then reiterated his fears and said : "I
will go, although I consider this the
most hazardous expedition and the
last of my life."
Mr. Dyar and I, when everything
had been arranged, started for tho
COUNCIL GROUND
On horseback, over tho bridal path,
while General Canby and Dr. Thomas
preceded us on foot. In going out.
Tobia Riddle, the Modoc squaw, said
to me : "Meacham, keep close to roe.
I don't know what they will do to
day. I don't understand them."
Frank Riddle, the husband of Tobia,
had said, in presence of all tho Com
missioners before leaving camp, that
he bad been cautioned, if anything
happened, to turn toward the horse.
WHEN WE ARRIVED
At the council ground, we found
seven Indians sitting around a sage
brush fire, armed with revolvers and
knives. Mr. Dyar and I dismounted
and they arose and shook hands with
ns in a very friendly manner, no others
being in sight. Pulling off my Alaska
great coat, I bung it on the born of
my saddle, and said, substantial
ly, that we had been there sixty days
trying to make peace and were not
tired yet, and that tber President was
not tired. That we were all
ANXIOUS FOR PEACE,
And that I bad come this time hop
ing to fix up a treaty which would
end all further trouble. Capt. Jack
here interrupted me by asking wbeth
er I bad anything new to talk about,
saying that it was not worth while to
talk, any more, unless tho soldiers
were going away. About this time
Hooka Jim went-to my horse, and,
taking my overcoat from the horn of
tbe saddle, put it on and walked
about, saying that he was "Meacham."
I then resumed, .telling Jack that the
President desired the soldiers to re
main until the trouble was settled,
and said further, "l want you to come
with me to Shasta or Fairchild's
Ranch, and we will try and have
everything closed up. v
SCONCHIN ' ,
Then made a speech, saying: "If you
will take the soldiers all away we will
go with you to Fairchild's Ranch.
While the soldiers stay, wo will not
go. This is all I bare to say.'' , ... -
GENEUAL CANBY
then addressed them, saying: "When
I was a youug man I began, to meet
tho Indians; my heart was always
good toward them. Twenty or thir
ty years ago I moved two bands of
Indians from Florida to the west side
of the Mississippi. They did not like
me at first, but I won their hearts,
and each tribe made me their honor
ary chief. The Sumiuoles culled me
the "Tall Chief," and the other tribu
gave me an Indian name which signi
fies "Friend." I visited thciu many
years afterwards, and they camo a
long way to see me. So I think it
will bo with the Modocs. The Com
missioners will give you a good home,
and I am here to see that thev carry
out all the promises thev make you.
That is what the President sent mo
hero for."
, ; DR. TII0.MA9
then made a speech, iho substance of
which is as follows : The Great Spirit
put it in the heart of the President to
send me here, believing that my heart
is good toward the Indians, and that
I will not get tired of talking peace
lo them. I have known Gen. Canby
and Mr. Meacham a long time, and
never knew them to tell a lie." I
then spoke again, saying that the
Commissioners would go with them
lo their new home in California, Ari
zona, or the Indian Territory, as the
va might be, and remain with them
until they were permanently settled.
Jack said he could not talk about a
country he had never seen; and Scon
chiti again said: "If you cannot give
us Fairchild's ranch w e need not talk
any more. At this juncture
TWO AltMKD INDIAN'S AI'i'EAUK.)
in sight, aud we all got upon our feet.
Captain Jack drew a revolver from
his breast, and, saving "This is what
it means!" snapped it at Gen. Canby,
with a further remark m huh I t-ould
not understand. Dyar, Riddle mid
iiysclf broke for the rocks, and at
the same instant Boston shot Dr.
Thomas in the left breast. As he fell
the Doctor exclaimed to lite Indians
not lo shoot him any more, as he
would die with the would he had.
BOGUS GUAKLET
asked him if he believed now what
Tobia had told them that the Indi
ans Mould kill him and another In
dian came up aud shot him iu the
head with a rifle. Captain Jack shot
General Canby in the head and stab
bed him in the neck as he fell. The
Indian woman did not run, but kept
pleading with the Indians for our
lives. I was running, Dyar and Rid
die being in advance, when I slum
bled and fell behind a rock Scon
chin, Mho had pursued mo from the
first, Mas upon me in an instant, and
drawing a single-barreled derringer,
I tired at him aiming at his body.
He stooped down, and resting his pis
tol on his knee, shot me in the let l
eye brow. He tired a second time,
the ball striking me in the right hand
aud comiug out at the wrist. The
next shot took aMay my lelt fore-fu-
per. lie then retreated, and I am un
der the impression that my shot had
taken effect. 1 he tent screened Gen
Canby and Dr. Thomas from my sight.
Here I became unconscious; and
when my sensibilities returned, some
one was trying to scalp me with a dull
knife. Tobia called to him lo run, as
the soldiers were coming, and he ran
awav. Her timely exclamation saved
my life without a doubt. V hue un
conscious I received a enn-shot wound
in the temple. The next I remember
was "Come up on Ihe left," spoken by
an officer to his men. KNAB.
TUB TARIFF MYMTEM.
Does the farmer understand that
an increased amount of $146,233,472
is collected off of the people bv a
ruinous system of tariff? The Hon.
Mr. Burcbard, of Illinois, in order
to show up the beauties of tbe "pro
tection theory, compiled tbe an
nexed table from official sources, and
it shows that the people, under tbe
tariff, pay annually, in the way of in
creased cost of borne manufactured
goods, tbe following amounts on the
article named :
ilanufacturtri of
Cotton goods. . . .
Pig iron ,
Silk
Wire...........
Woolen goods . .
Railroad iron
Wroughtiron. . . ,
Steel.:.........
Paper ,
Imcretued Coat
.$ 51.241,000
. 12,950,000
. 11,250,000
. 1,003,000
. 60 28G.000
. 4,340,000
. '9,230,000
. 2387,340
. 3,536,132
Total tax of, . ... .... $140,283,472
This goes as a bounty to monopo
lists in tbe East, and is taken from
tbe pockets of an already impoverish
ed people. But "American industry'
must bo protected even though tbe
West be made one vast poor-bouse.
A traveler on a miserable lean
steed, was hailed bv a Yankee, who
was boeing bis pumpkinB by tbe road
side
"Hallo! friend, where are yon
bound f .
"I am going to settle in the west
ern country," replied the other.
"Well, get off, and straddle this
ere pumpkin vine it will grow and
carry you faster than that ere beast.
One of bur citizens went to the
cars tbis morning to see bis wife off,
and having two or three minutes, be
fore starting time, "Stepped around
the corner an instant." He returned
just in time to see tbe train, moving
on, ana slapping ma leg emphati
cally, ne regretfully enunciated, '
ought not to have taken sugar."
Tbe Chicago Evening- Post savs:
o . -
Women of Xiouisvijle are, as a rule,
pigeon-toed, and wear washing cop
pers on thir big toes so as to pre
vent accident when tbey interfere.
Mrs. McCord, a Dubuque woman, is
worrying because Bhe cannot get ber
bands in the hair of her husband, a
beautiful blonde, with false teeth and
a false heart, who has . deserted her.
I'LA'I f-OKM OVX1IK II.I.I.OtM irAUSltAlH I
Following is full set of resolutions
adopted by ; tbe Illinois Farmers'
Stute Convention on , tbe 27th of
March. .They have tbe ring of tbe
genuine metal:
lli-solved by the farmers of Illinois
in muss meeting assembled:
l. X hat all chartered monopolies
not reguluted and controlled by law
have proved in that respect detri
mental to the public prosperity, cor
rupting in their management aud
dangerous to republican institutions.
Z. Ihe ruwwuv of the world, ex
cept in those countries wbere they
have been held under the strict regu
lations and supervision of the gov-
erument, have proved themselves
arbitrary, extortionate and us much
opposed to free institutions and free
commerce between states as the
fx-uual barons of tbe middle ages.
3. That we hold, declare ud re
solve that this despotism which
defies our laws, plunders our ship
pers, impoverishes our people aud
corupts our government shall bo sub
dued and made to subserve the pub
lic interest at whatever cost.
llfjuAced that we believe the state
did not and could not confer any of
its sovereign power upon Kiiy cor
poration, und that now is the most
favorable time to settle the question
so that it may never be hereafter
misunderstood; that a tate cannot
create a corporation it caunot there
after control.
Itemolvcd that in Tiew of the present
extortions we look with alarm upon
the future of an interest which can
combine iu the bauds of a few men a
capital of nearly $250,000,000 in our
sUte and l.WU.OCU.UUU iu the Unit
ed States, and we believe it essential to
the population of all classes that this
contest continue until those coipo-
ralions acknowledge the supremacy
of the law.
lleaolwd that we regard it as the
undoubted power and the imperative
duty of the legislature to pass laws
and H'atutc-s fixing reasonable rates
for freights aud passengers without
classification of rouds, and that we
urge upon our genenal asssembly
the passages of such laws.
llewAved that the existing statutes
providing for the acclamation of rail
roads, with a view to adjusting a
tariff of charges according to the
gross amount of earning, is a delu
sion and a snare, and is so framed
that the railroads are able to classify
themselves, and that it ought to be
carefully modified or repealed.
Iteitolccd that inasmuch as tbe su
preme court bos clearly pointed out
the way to reach the unjust discrim
inations niado by the railroads of this
sLtte we cau see no reason of delay
un the prat of the legislature in en
acting necessary laws on the subject,
aud we urgo immediate action there
on. Jleiolved that we urge the passage
of a bill enforcing the principle that
railroads are public highways and re
quiring railroads to make actual con
nections with all roads whose tracks
reach nd cross their own, and to re
ceive and transmit all cars and trains
offered over their roads at reasonable
maximum rates, whether offered at
such crossings or at stations along
their roads, and empowering tbe mak
ing of connections by municipal
corporations for that purpose and for
the public use.
Jlenolvcd that we heartily indorse the
action of the general assembly in
looking to the enforcements of the
performance of their duties by
monopolies as common carriers, and
that in addition thereto we believe
that railroads should be required to
carry all the freight and passengers
offered from the country through
which tbey pass, and not permitted
to limit the amount of their busi
ness and destroy its natural increase.
llewlved that tho constitution' and
laws of Illinois are as binding upon
railroad corporations as upon tbe
citizens, and that the state must re
quire obdiet ce to the law alike from
all, whether tbe same be deemed
constitutional or not be parties affect
ed, until repealed or declared uncon
stitutional.
Resolved that we indorse most ful
ly the action of those who tender
legal rates of fare upon the railroads
and refuse to pay more, and that it
is the duty of tbe legislature to pro
vide by law for the defence by the
state of Illinois Buits commenced, or
that hereafter may be commenced
by railroad companies against indi
viduals who, in good faith, have in
sisted or hereafter may insist on tbe
right to ride on railroads at legal
rates. s
Resolved that the presentation of
railroads passes, to. our legislators.
whatever may be the spirit and in
tent with which they are accepted,
are demoralizing in their influence,
and we look to our legislature now in
session to rise above all personal con
eiderationa of pecuniary interest or
convenience, and to pass a law mak
ing it a misdemeanor for any senator
or representative, or other state or
county omcer, to accept any railroad
pass, knowing as we do that tbe peo
ple look upon the acceptance of these
passes with decided and almost uni
versal disapprobation. ; ,. .'. r
- Whereas, the constitution of 1848,
article ten, prohibits the legislature
from granting special railroad char
ters in the following words: "Cor
porations not possessing ; banking
powers or privileges may be formed
under creneral law but shall . not be
created- by special acts except for
municipal purposes, and jn cases
where, in ". the judgement of - the
general assembly, the object of tbe
corporations cannot be attained un
der general laws." Therefore. v
Resolved that it is extremely doubt
ful whether any railroad - charter
granted since April 1 1848, by the
legislature of 'Illinois, is of any
validity and that the ' vested 1 rights
of railroad monopolies in. this state
I exist only by the assumption of ' the
NO. 38
monopolists and the suffrage of the
people; and,
WiiEKEAS the constitution of 1870,
artical 11, section 13, prohibits any
railroad company from issuing water
ed stock, in these words: , No rail
road corporation shall issue any
stock or bonds' except for money.
labor or property actually, received
and applied to the purpose for which
said corporation was created, and all
stock dividends and other fictitious
increase of the capital stock or iu
deblness of any such corporations
shall be void, the capital stock of no
railroad corporation shall b increas
ed lor any purpose, except upon giv
ing sixty days' public notice in such
a manner as may be provided by law;
and f .
Whkukas this article of tbe con
stitutions has urobablv been violated
by nearly all the railroad companies
in the state; therefore
Resolved that it is the duty of the
railroad commissioners to Ijok carts'
fully into this matter, and to com
mence proceedings in all clear cases
by quo warranto, or otherwise, against
all railroad c iu panes which have
disregarded this important provision
of the organic law of this state.
Resolve d that we regard the - im
provement of the Illinois river not
sectional but of great importance.
and we request the rx.ember of the
bouse of representatives to vote for
tbe bill cow pending for tbe improve
ment of that river, as it will give our
state absolutely in the bands of tbe
people.
Resolved that we demand of con
gress a repeal of all laws preventing
tha competition of small vessels
which may choose to engage in tbe
carrying trade on our inland lakes,
between ports in tbe United States,
without regard to nationality.
RrsiAvrd that we are in favor of tbe
immediate repeal of the protective
duties on iron, steel, lumber, and all
materials which enter into the con
structions of railroad cars, steam
ships, sailing vessels, agricultural
implements, kc, and that we urge
upon congress immediate action for
this purpose that cheap railroads
and cheap ships are necessary to
cheap freights, and that we invite
the railroad companies, to co-operate
with us to that end.
A SLAP IX THE FACE.
Mr. Curtis, who baa been running
the civil service reform, has hit the
president a knock direct between the
eves, which bos sent him clear into
New York, full into the sympathiz
ing embrace of Murphy, who did so
much stealing and so satisfactorily to
the president, while he was collector
of the port.
Mr. Curtis tells the president in
pretty plain language, that he has
violated the civil service rules' and
regulations so palpably and so often,
that there is no use for the commis
sion holding together any longer,
consequently he resigns in disgust.
Tbis is what becomes of the boasted
civil service reform, of which we beard
so much from Grant's friends during
the late presidential canvass.
It is a humbug in tbe hands of its
enemies. The opposition - were its
true friends and forced it upon the
Grant party reluctantly, and the
very first moment they thought it
would do, tbey have trampled it
under foot. In doing so, tbey have
disgraced the men who attempted to
run the commission honestly, and, of
course, no one with a particle of self
respect could longer remain a mem
ber of it. Consequently Mr. Curtis
and Mr. Med ill have taken French
leave, and told the president to go to
thunder with bis civil service reform.
Burliugton Gazette
The St. Louis Democrat man rid
icules the manner of examining can
didates for office under the Civil
Service rules by suggesting the fol
lowing, among other, questions to be
answered:
Were you born before Sumter
was fired on, or after the black bird
of war had ceased to flap its dark pin
ions over our beloved land?
Do you believe in Darwinism?
If 60, how many of your ancestors
do you calculate you would be com
pelled to dig up before you found an
extra length of spine?
When is the bejt time to trim
corn?
Is bathing hereditary in your fam
ily?
Do you differ from Webster in your
style of spelling? If so, in what
words?-
When did New Jersey secede from
the Union? .
At the present rate of punishing
crime, bow long will it be till mur
derers are pensioned?
What was the number of acres in
Rhode Island when first discovered?
Do your shirts-open in front or
behind
What was the name of the son of
Austerlitz, and did the old man hare
any daughters?
Who was the Secretary of the Navy
while the Erie canal was being built?
A Nxcs Old Lady. Saturday even
ing, a chirp young miss,, escorted by
her gallant through the crowd of
Danbary's main street, caught the eye
of an old lady, and her delighted
voice sounded above the noises of the
street as she cried, "Why, gracious
goodness, Almira Ann 13oardman
poor dead Miss Pinckney's basque
sets almost as snu? to you as if it
had been made for you." 'And the
old -lady rubbed- her : nose very
pleasantly, while Miss . Boardman
turned black with suppressed grati
tude. , J .'''--J-: . - -, ;
A Cleveland lover, while going
home from the fair one's firesidet af
ter a delicious evening of .sparking,
had his nose split by the frost (so be
said,) but when this statement reached
the ears of another youth who: was
sweet on the same girl, he ' simply
gazed at his fist, 'smiled, and said
"frost ." - : r
Cosines notices in tha ! ri...
cent par Iido, each insertion.
For legal sod tmnownt ndvertiieAicrt' f 1 50
fMsrnoreof 12 lines, for tbe flmt ir,crtiD
and SI 00 per square for each subsequent ix-
f Written for the Oregon Herald.T
Ol'U ANSWER TO BEECH EK.
BY , t. SIMPSOjr.
ItMinr Wanl tlAA.t.. I n ...... , . . .
j ...... i.,ut.( iu .p-rMifnj isn niznt
Invoked the Ka(h-rof ll monklrirl to rtmm-
.. t.i. s i,v ,T,,iiur"n oi in ior-L vnof-fent-up
wroncs had driven tb-m to bloodshed
'Jjteal murder-Xev Yorlt Dlspatcn,
Sow loosen the crape that has clouded the
; stars.
Of oursorrowlnz flair m It hum. at
Lt tbe sun kiss Its tipples tha wind hit tt
oars.
Our dead have been burled, our walling -is
part;
In sllcnm it cluoz, and each slow-fctavlng
sw-il, -
Was a Mgh for the soldl'-r that carried It weU,
Cut UD I to the D?ak ! let It float Is, t ho .nr
Of th; cavalry hu(fle that rings on the trail
ji wc erueiesi in order and deadliest wrong
That has made woman weep ot tho strongest
grow pale.
Hurrah ! It lias risen like ribbons of flr.
Tbe stripes llaralng vengeance leap froe to tni
un.
And iu constellate glories burn red with an
Ire
That i splendid In battle where victories are
won;
And wild as the resonant swing of the sea.
The wrath of our thousands is mighty and free I
Tbe olive must wait it has withered with,
corn;
And tho white flag must down it Is spotted
with blood.
In the gospel of crimson that blushes tit mora
From desolate Shasta to helmetted ll-jod.
And the courtiers of IX.-aven the potted and
sleek.
Who think of the "papers" whatever they
. speak.
And cUib to the Throne on a flowery stair;
1,-t tbeiu flatter the Lord with, their richest
boquet
It Is pale by the blood of our murdered to-day S
Aha! they may kneel on their velvet and ak.
That the aru of the Highly be gracicusiy
thrown
O'er the path of tbe fugitive sweet Is the tank
Of their souls la forgiving oil wrongs but thair
own!
We, too, have a God! and bis temples are here,'
Where the sj.ires of the uiouiitains are wreathed
with tbe stars;
We, too, have God! and we know be l near.
From the pledge that is wnt on tbe red shield
of Mars,
By the sua which on Gibeon waited thy word
And kindled the rush of thy glimmering sword ;
y the widow that kneel wherj the fatherless
sleep.
And the ashes of homes that were altars to thee;
Dy the blood they have sown and the blood
they must reap.
We ask for a border unshadowed and freat
A FA3I1X.Y OF IRISH CIA XT.
Perhaps we may make no excuse
for departing from the custom of not
noticing exhibitions, when we call
attention of our readers to tbe most
remarkable development adipose tis
sue which Las, probably, ever been
observed in Europe, at least within
one lamily. it is interesting, as
testing the laws rf heredity, to ob
serve the peculiarities of the O'Ntal
family, of which a careful examina
tion by a writer in the Medico-CLi-
irgic-al Keview leads him to vouch
for the accuracy of the extraordinary
measurements we give. They &ro
natives of Ireland, Queen's cou: J?.
forty-seven miles from the city of
Dublin. They are born of respect
able parents, hard-working farmers.
The father stood six feet, and v.eigh-.
ed twenty-seven stone (or 073
pounds). The mother is foitv-vtj
years of age, stands five feet two
inches in height, measures around
her arm twenty-six inches, across her
shoulders three feet, round her waist
five feet six inches, and weighs the
enormous weight of twenty-one stone
(or 294 pounds). Her elder son is
twenty-five years of age, stands six
feet two inches, weighs eighteen
stone five pounds (or 257 pounds),
and, at the present time he is a Life
Guard. All the sons and daughters
were of large dimensions. Miss
Ann O'Neal, the eldest daughter, is
twenty years of age. She stands
five feet six inches in height, and
measures round the aria twenty-seven
inches, across her shoulders one
yard and a half, around her waist
eight feet, and is the enormous
weight of thirty-nine . stone (54S
pounds). Her younger sister is
eighteen years of age. She stands
five feet two inches in heighth meas
ures round her arm twenty-five inch
es and her shoulders three feet,
round her waist six feet, and weighs
twenty-three stone (322 pounds).
Her eldest daughter is, as may well
be imagined, . on account of ber
obesity, scarcely able to walk. She
appears to be uneasy on , her legs,
and compelled to lean up against, the
wall for support. Tbe vaccination
marks on her arms having increased
with age and development of adipose
tissue, are as large as ordinary sau
cers. As there is no padding or arti
fical method employed to enhance
the enormous weight of the speci
mens, the disproportion which strikes
the observer between the gigantc
bodies and the relatively Fmall
though absolutely large crania is al
startling. , Tbe hands are coarse
and large-boned. In Ann -O'Neal
(affectionately and absurdly named
"Liiy" by her smaller relatives) the
malar bones are enormous, and tha
mbuth is much underhung by the
forward projection of the lower jaw.
Although the month showes signs
of excessive alcoholic consumption,
there is do disease noticeable or
complained of; and tbe subjects do
not appear to suffer, from any other
f affection than the incovemence of
having . to support so much fat.
irj.- ? t : i
. A farmer who wished to invest the
accumulation of his industry ia. Unit
ed States securities, went into a
broker's office to obtain some "five
twenties." The clerk inquired:
VWhat denomination, will you have
them, sir?" Having; never , heard
that word used excepting to dis
tinguish sects, the farmer, after a
little deliberation, replied: Well,
you may give me part in the Old
School Prespyterian,- to please , , lip
oid lady; but give ma the hefs ciit
inFree-Will Baptist." ',, , ,
Don't take too much interest in tha
affairs of your neighbors. Tea . p
cent will do. '
4
k-V