STATE RIGHTS DEMOCRAT.
"
rVSLIIHXD KTZKT SATURDT,BT
ABBOTT & BROWN.
Ha. AaSOTT. I K. T. BROWS.
OFFICE !H KAHNON'S BUILDING, FIRST STREET
TERMS, M ADTisci t Oneyear,$3; Six Months
t2 On Month, 50 eta. Single Copies, 12J cts.
Corrwroondents writlni over assumed signatures
r anonymously, matt make known their proper
tames to the Editor, or no attention win .
to their eommnnloatlons.
Alt Tj.nr. .nA Communications, whether on
easiness or for publication, should bo addressed to
Abbott A Brown.
BUSINESS CARDS
N. II. CBASOB,
1TT0UET AND COCXSEILOR AT LAW,
Orrict Io ttorcross' Brick Building, up-stairs,
0 Albany, Oregon,
au4
C. A. BLACKLEY,
f J&KttNABlE BARBER AND HAIR DRESSER.
WOULD RESPECTFULLY INFORM THE
ciUiensof Albany that he has opened a
arborSbop,oa Main streo", two doors above
Z?rrh Block, whero he is prijared to accom
modate all who desire anything la the tonso
gial litwt . . . .
a also cUtee tfcat kit aexrkes can be had at
aay time, with duo notice, to
CA1L FIGURES for PARTIES or calls,
a reasonable terms. decl2T4nl7mi
jonx J. WHITNEY,
JTTOBXEI AXD COUNSELLOR AT LAW
' and Notary Public
gaoetal attentions given to collections.
OmenI As Court House.
Albany, Oregon. T3n3tf.
51. CANTERBURY, 31. D.,
Physioian and Surgeon,
CORVALLIS, OREGON.
3-OEee, B. R. Riddle's Dreg Store.
ovH63 v4nl3tf
G. TV. GRAY. D. D. S.,
cbasuate or THt cnaiian dehtm. college,
WOULD INVITE ALL PERSONS DESIR
Ing Artificial teeth and firsi-elass Dental
Operations, to giro him a calL
Specimens of Valeanite Basa with gold, plate
Imiags, and other new styles of work, may bo
eonathisoffiee. np stairs la Parruh A Co. i
Ilriek, Albany, Oregon. '
Residence, eorner of Second and Raker streets.
aprirSvJ34tf
j. c. rowel.
POWELL & FLIXX,
JLTTORXEYS AXD COUNSELLORS AT
LA W AXD SOLICITORS IX CUAXCER Y,
(X riiaa, Notary Public.)
ALBANY, Oregon. Collections and eonvey
aaees promptly attended to. ocSOnlOly
CFFICE OF C80TI SCHOOL SrPEBIXTES'T,
A T WATERLOO, SIX MILES ABOVE LEB
A won, on the Santianu Pfi.e(e Jdre"
I.ioaaoft. J. . MALK,
TSnlSly Co. School Superintendent.
C- O- CUBL.,
ATTORNEY. AT I-AW,
SALEM, OREGON:
V?n practiea In all the Courts ef this State and
HI attend the Circuit Court terms in Linn eounty
aid the entire District. OSco in Watkinds A Co s
fc.-kk.ap stairs. rZnjl
D. B. RICE, 31.
Surgeon and Phys cian,
ALBANY, OREGON,
THASKFBL FOR THE LIBERAL PATRON
are recoired, conUaues to tender his services
U the eUhena f Albany and surrounding eoun
trr. 0 floe and residence, on Second street, two
hlxts east ef Sprenger's hew IIoteL v3n3itf
W. . BILTAJIBIO. . BPFIELD.
HILT4BIDEL Si CO.,
B BALERS IN GROCERIES AND PBOVI
sioBf, Wood and WUlow Ware, Confection
er, Tebaeco, Cigars, Pipes, Notions, etc. Store
a Uaiae street, adjoining the Express office, Al
fca ay, Oregon. . se2Sr3n7tf
BESJ. HAYDEX,
Attorney and Counsellor at Law,
Will attend to all business entrusted to him hy
itiieasof Polk and adjoining counues.
Esla, July 26, 1867.
T2a51tf
SA&aOWS, U BLAIT, TOCKO.
JT. BARROWS & CO.,
03XE&AL ti COXUTSSIOX MERCHANTS
i BALERS la Staple, Dry and Fancy Goods,
Groceries. Hardware, CuUery, Crocnery,
intM and Shoes. Albany. Oregon.
solicited. - ocn8tf
ALBANY BATH HOUSE!
fllHB UNDERSIGNED WOULD RESPECT
I folly inform, tho citizens of Albany and tI
oulty that he has taken charge of thii Establish
sni,and,by keeping clean rooms and paying
strict attention to business, expects to suit alktbose
b e may faror him with their patronage. Hating
kei-etofore carried on nothing but
TlrgrQlass Hair Dressing Salooos,
he expects to giro entire satisfaction to alL
Eff-CbUiien and Ladies' Hair neatly cut and
hlTpooel JOSEPH WEBBER.
apr4T3n33tf
r. r. arsszi,
A ,t'y at Lay,
AMeS SLK1HS'
Notary Public
RUSEEI & ELUIXS,
Of les la ParrisVs A Cos Block, First Street,
ALBANY, OREGON.
its rla g taken into co-partnership James Elkins,
Ex-Clerk of Linn county, Oregon, we are
jSniJbled to add to our practice of law and colleo
jfcio it, tnperior facilities for
OcsYeyancing, JlTaminiTig Eecords,
Attendingr to Probate Business.
J)eds, Bonds, Contracts and Mortgages carefully
' -dn.wn. Homestead and Pre-emption papers made
an l Claims secured. Sales of Real Estate negoti
jiua, and loans effected on Collateral securities on
res srnable rates. ,
Mt business entrusted to them will bo promptly
. aUsndedto. RUSSELL A ELKINS.
' (kt. 6, 1868 T2n46tf
NOTICE !
alHOSE WHO WANT REAPERS, HEADERS,
: Threshers, Mowers, Gang-Plowr, Self-Raking
Jiiihines, Seed Drills, 4c, at Portland prices,
freight added, (see hand-bill of E. A. Hawley A
Co ., Portland,) will please call on
- Vi';' ; ! ' CHEADLE, Agent,
Srf T3o33tf Albany.. Oreron.
NOTICE!
T 00K QUT FOB, THE CARS 1 JUST RE-
a J ceiTed : a very large hock. 01
DRY GOODS AND GROCERIES!
fjy stealer from San Francisco. I will sell for
path ox merchantable produce, at low prices, my
entire stock of Geods, to. make room for more.
'Pal and see for yourselTes.
R. CHEADLE'S
ijri3a33tf Cash Store, Albany.
STATE
VOL. IV.
ADVERTISEMENTS.
NEW ENGLAND
MUTUAL LIFE INSURANCE COMPANY
OFDOSTON.
PURELY MUTUAL.
IXCOUPOIIATED 1S35.
r.H !. ... 17.000,000 00
Cash Distributions of 1861 - - . ",68 55
Total Surplus Diviaea - - m,4Srttin an
Lom Paid in 1861 - - - ?8.99 99
Total Losses P.td - - f'JS'ioi 00
Income fur 1861 - 31,203,808 00
No Extra Charge for Traveling to ana
from the Atlantlo states, Europe,
Oregon, and Sandwich Islands. '
w l s i i . i nnl,n.r fi.mtiaiiT !i rovcrned by
tho N0N-F0UFE1TUUE law of Ma-sachusetts.
ALL RET EARNINGS DIVIDED ANNUALLY AMONG THE
rald nromDtlv. AlIpoUclesNon-forfeiUblo
DIVIDENDS DECLARED AND TAID ANNU
ALLY !
Firt Dividend A tall alU at Jtym
... . -J.-. Af nmniturl PollCV holders) in
ilUlVU, i
this Company, among whom he annual surplus is
divide J.
Unbiased judgment, bssed upon careful Invetl
Ration, will show that this (the oldest Mutual Life
Insurance Company of America) offers wore equi
ties to tho insured than any other Company doing
business on this coast.
Life Insurance is ajuaicious inveswucniior c.p-i-.i-
t :.. . .r invwiittnent fcr those in mod
uli IS IS. II w m ov. ,
crate circumstances, by which they may, with a
small amount of funds, leara to their families
ample means for their support in case of the early
decease oi toe insureu.
Home OSUe, 39 State Street, Dotton.
nintnn miVHI OFFICES! 302 M'-nt-
.tn'cL an Francisco: Room 3, Carter's
BuiUing. Portland, Oregon
General Agents.
Rt SSELI, EEUIXS. AR't.
Parrih A Co's Block, Albany, Oregon.
ppl9'68Tln5tf
PACIFIC HOTEL
THE UNDERSIGNED RESPECTFULLY
iaforas tho publie that this House
HAS JUST BEEN FINISHED,
ASO IS
T O "W OPEN
far the accommodation ef all who may
faror him with their patronage.
THE FURNITURE
Is entirely new in erery department,
and is of tho latest and
most approved sty Its.
THE TABLE
will always be supplied with the best the market
affordf, and nw pains will be spared
for the comfort and conve
nience f bis guest.
Persons writing by boats accommodated at all
hours, day or night.
Suits of rooms and superior aceommodalions for
families.
fn the buirincf s warrants the
proprietor in promising satisfaction to all who may
faror biai with their patronage, If it ean be done
i i .:r.,ii. .,iT,r.liol tii,lf. Tfkasant rooms,
cleanly beds andassiduous attention t their wanU.
Albany, June 1, 186S. " ' 3n42tf
WILLAMETTE STEAMBOAT COS
NOTICE.
IROM AND AFTER TIII3 VALt. van
further notice.
THE STEAMER
Jim?jr WEIVAT !
WILL LEAVE PORTLAND EVERY DAY,
(SUNDAYS EXCEPTED),
FOR OREGON CITY,
At 6:30 A. M., connecting with the Steamer
SUCCESS,
Oa MONDAYS and THURSDAYS ot each week,
For Salem, Albany and Corvallis
and all intermediate points ; and with the
STEAMER ANN,
On the same days for DAYTON.
RETURNING Will leave Oregon City
at 1 o'clock P. M., except Wednesdays and Sat
urdays, on which days she will await tho arrival
of the steamers SUCCESS and ANN from above.
aar For Freight or Passage, apply to J. H
SMITH, at the American Exchange Wharf.
seP26v4n6tf. BT, IIAUN, President.
ISA. A. JfltLEB.
A. P. MILLER.
MILLER & BRO.i
(Successors to Philip Miller,)
MARBLE WORKS
ALBANY, OREGON.
Shop on Washington, bet. 1st and 2d St's.
rwxnwar. mrSTT.V.ME?! RKa LEAVE TO IN
J form the public at large that they are now
prepared to furnuh
31 ARR EE MONUMENTS
- AND ' .
GRAVE - STONES!
Or EVE BY STYLE AND PATTERN,
At the Most Reasonable Prices.
TOr.lBSTOTJES CUT TO ORDER
On the very shortest notice. (
Mar7v3n29tf MILLER qp, BRO.
XTOTICE.
A LL PERSONS KNOWING THEMSELVES
indebted to tho undersigned, will please come
forward and settle up, as the old Books must be
- Closed by tho 1st of January, 1QC9.
Albany, Dec. p6onirtfc A, COWAN.
EIGHTS
ALBANY, OREGON, SATURDAY, JANUARY 9, 1869.
FOE Til Y.
OUR CHILDHOOD.
IT OK0ROR
. e
D. rfiRXTICX.
'Tfs sad, yet sweet, to listen
To the soit wind's gcutle swell,
And think we hear the iniulo
Our childhood loved so well
To gaso out on the even.
And the boundless fields of air,
And feel again our boyhood's wish
To roam liko angels there I
Tbero are many dreams of gladness
That oling around the past
And from the tomb of leeling
Old thoughts come thronging fast
The forms wo loved so dearly
In tho bappy days now gone,
The beautiful and lovely,
So fair to look upon.'
Those bright and gentlo maidens
Who emed o formed for bliss
Too glorious aud to heavenly
For sucb a world as this
Whoso dark 'soft eyes seemod swimming
In a sea of liquid light.
And whosolocks of gold were streaming
O'er brows so sunny bright
Whoso smiles were liko tho sunshine
In tho spring time of tho year
Like the changeful gleams of April,
They followed every tear!
They have passed like hopes- away.
And their lovelibess has fled
Oh ! many a tear is mourning
That they are with the dead t
Like the brightest buds of sammer.
They have fallen with the item
Yet, oh t it is a lovely death
To fade from earth like themt
And yet the thought is saddening
To muo on u h as they.
And feet that all the beautiful
Are panning fast away !
That tho fair ones whom we love,
Orow to each loving breast,
Liko the tendril of the clinging Tine,
Then perish where they rest.
And wo can but think of these,
la the soft and gentle spring,
When the trees are waring o'er as,
And the flowers are tlooraing j
And we know that winter's coming.
With its eotd aud lrmy sky,
And the glorious beauty 'round us
Is budding but to die !
Lemons are now sold by tho dozen in
Jioston at one-third the price asked for
good apples.
Not onejitcrarv man in fifty coiovs
good health in this country; but it is quite
-i r . !.
me rvYcnK) ia ureal jjuuiiu.
but it is ot very little consequence to a
poor man with a large family.
A white boy met a colored loci the oth
er day, and aikcd him what he had ftuch
a abort nose for. 4I epect'a fo it won't
poke itself into other people's business,"
answered he.
An incorrigible wag who lent a minis
ter a horse which ran away and threw his
clerical rider, thought he fchould have
souic credit for his aid in "spreading"
the gospel.
An Alabama editor, in pulling a gro
cery kept by a woman, says : "Her to
matoes arc as red as her own cheeks ; her
indigo a blue as her own eyes ; and her
pepper as hot as her own temper."
At a radical meeting in Jolict, III., the
other day, a banner was carried in the
"lotl" procession with thej following in
scription upon it: "Let the Irish go to
Ireland and stay there."
According to the latest definition a
bachelor is a man who has lost the oppor
tunity of making a woman miserable.
A Tounir Dhrsician. asking permission
of a lass to kiss her, she replied, "No,
sir ; 1 never wane a uoctor a uiu biuck in
my face.
Why is a watch dog larger at night
than he is in the morning ? Because he
is let out at night and taken in in the
morning.
The Pittsburg Journal invites men of
talent to settle in that smoke-covered city,
and says it "will just soot 'em."
Situations are like skeins of thread : to
make the most of them we need only take
thein by right end.
A respectable lady was sent to prison
some weeks ago, in New York, on com
plaint of her daughters, for being a con
firmed drunkard.
The Revolution recounts weekly "what
women are doing." If its reports could
be relied on a number of husbands would
subscribe at once.
New York journals advise rustic youths
to remain at home, if they can possibly
live there, and not migrate to the metrop
olis to starve.
It is spoken of as a remarkable fact
that twelve nours recently e lapse a in
London without tho occurrence of any
firo that called for the service of tho fire
department. '
''Caught at last,". as the constable said
to the shoemaker who wa3 guilty of theft,
as be pounced upon mm at his work.
Many who, in this world, occupy a
high seat in the synagogues, theatres.
and other high places, will, we fear, in
the world to come, find only a place in tho
"pit."
Our friend Snizer, who is always study
ing the appropriateness of things, wants
. 1 ?i i U -i !. '
10 Know II ll would not ue quue as prop
er to call sewing circles simply sew
cieties.
New Orleans has a widow who haunts
one of the Recorder's courts, Tinder the
impression that some day she will see her
son, who was once tried there tor mur
der.
Below will be found what is deemed a
proper text from which to preach the
funeral sermon ot Ben. liutier: urom
Jeremiah iii., 19 : And , the basins, and
the firepans, and the bowls, and the caul
drons. and the candlesticks, an'd the
spoons, and the cups, that which was of
.gold, in gold, and that which was oi sil
ver, in silver, the captain of the guard
took away,
TIIIJ PUIiPlT'M OPPORTUNITY.
"Wo clip tho following scnsiblo article
from a late New York Journal of, Com
merce :
Now is the timo for ministers of the
gospel to give up political preaching. We
aro satisfied that a majority of those pas
tors who have mixed politics with their
theology, in the proportions of nino to one,
for some years back, have done it against
their better judgment. They havo yield
ed to the fashion of tho times, to their
example of powerful and successful
preachers, to tho real (or supposed) irre
futable current of feeling of tneir congre
gations. Wo havo always held them, as
a class, to bo abovo the sordid aims of
politicians. Ihey-liavo not preached pol
itics for money, nor for vulgar applause ;
but because they had not sufiicicnt moral
strength to resist tho trcmcudous pressure
which was brought to bear upon them by
church conventions and assemblies, and
by active aud influential occupants of
pews. In some in Stan ess the pressure
rom the pews was not real, but imaginary.
The pastor, observing the tendencies in
other churches, sought to anticipate it in
his own, with unnecessary precipitation,
and putting himself at the head of hi
flock, led it into politics. Still, as a gen
eral rule, the motive power, when it did
not originate outsido of the church, came
from tho pews, and forced tho pastor to
write political addresses under the name
of Ncrnions, and pray for the success of a
arty more than tho coming of Christ
ingdom. Their Bible was their text
book their point of departure, chiefly
in the sense that they departed from it
but tho body of their theology was too
often taken from newspaper editorials or
from the platforms of excited public meet
ing held during the previous week.-
Many preachers reflected the varying
shades of radical sentiment so truthfully,
that hy stepping into their churches ou
Sunday a person could learn the condition
of the political atmosphere as from a bar
ometer. There was a little garniture of
religion in the reading of the .Scriptures
(not always selected with reference to the
topics of the day), in the short prayer
possibly, and in the formal benediction,
beyond any doubt, but these were merely
trimmings to tho huge hot-joint of pure
politics, at which tho preachers cut aud
carve again.
This political preaching has been the
shame and scandal of Christ's Church.
It has been the prolific causo of infidelity,
not only outside of the church, but with
in its pale: not only in the pews, but in
the pulpits. At first it was a curious
novelty, and pastors found their coogre
gallons increased, perhaps an hundred
fold. Men flocked to the political church
cs as they went to the opera, the theater,
or the circus, to be excited and amused.
Thcv could applaud and thev could laush
there at every etnart political hit, freely
and without reouke. It was religion
made easy: and, liko virtuo made easy,
there was very little of it left when you
camo to look for it.
Newspapers were used to advertise
those political sermons m advance. I ar
tiran journals published the sermons next
day, not omitting the cheers and laughter
where they properly came in, and flatter
cd the preachers in editorial articles. A
great deal of hard work of tho campaign
was put upon their shoulders, homo of
them talked politics not only two or three
times every .Sunday, but odd evenings du
ring the week. They were too willing to
work, they were too zealous in their new
cause, and they overdid it. Satiety -in
the congregation soon followed excess in
preaching. Tho outside attendance fell
off; many of the pew owners who had
liked the thing when it was new, got sick
of it at list, and these preachers finally
found themselves in the condition of men
who, having taken a false position, feel
compelled, out of regard to consistency,
to maintain it at all hazards. In this re
solve they have been encouraged and
sustained by small but active knots of
politicians, who give the tone to many of
our churches, lhcre are clergymen who
have eccn their flocks scattered beyond
recall, and their churches sold out or
turned into places of amusement before
they would consent to retrace their steps
to religion, pure and undented.
Now is the time for ministers to weed
out politics from their religion. The
political reaction, of which we see the
sixns all around us, is a protest against
political preaching and numerous other
errors and fallacies. Iho reactionary feci
ing affects all classes of society, in all
their relations.
We believo that, if a show of hands
were called for in the churches next Sun
day, a majority of votes would' be found
in favor of excluding politics from the
pulpit: or, if tho sentiments of the mem
bers should be equally divided, we believe
that there would bo an almost general ac
quiescence in tho pastor's determination
to eschew politics for tho future. Pastors
would be surprised to discover how cheer
fully their peoplo would now follow their
lead out of tho miry paths of politics
back to the ancient trodden ways. They
must by this time bo satisfied that it is
impossible to get out of radical politics by
going to the end of it for it has no end.
The possible crochets of the radical mind
are infinite. Political preachers never
can say that their work is done, and lay
off their harness. "Excelsior 1" is still
the cry, and always will be, of the frantic
agitators who occupy the van of radica
movements. They care nothing for the
church, except as it aids them in their
dangerous ventures. While they use it
they despise it. This fact is made clear
in the last number .of Wendell Phillip's
organ, which says: ',
''Churches and the clergy are, as form
erly, for tho most part, but make-weights,
or a positive drag, where they should be
foremost in leading the nation in the light
of immutable, fundamental Christian
principles through its, presont difficult
and dangerous pass."
This is the gratitude which the politi
cal clergy receive from those who have
sought to dictate their style of preaching
for a number of years. How much long
er will ministers of the gospel submit to
these hardest of task-masters f
JOSH 1111 A AS GH PAPERS.
THK CpCKUOACH.
The cockroach is a bug at largo. .
Ho iz wun uv tho luxuries uv civiliza-
shun.
He iz easy tew dornestikate, yielding
raccfully tew ordinary kindness, and nev
er deserting those who show him proper
acts uv curtesy.
Ave are led tew believe, upon a clus.j
examination uv tho outward crust uv
theze fushunable insckts, that tba are a
highly" successful intcmarriage between
tho brunette pissmire, and tho " artikilus
bevo," ur common Amerikan grass-hopper.
Naturalists, however, uiUer, which iz
ew be lamented, for a diversity uv senti
ment, upon matters so important tew the
pece uv mind and moral advancement uv
mankind in tho lump, creates distrust,
and tends tew sap tho substrata uv all
ug cthicks.
But let tho learned and polite pull hair
az mutch az tha pleze about the ancestral
claims uv the cockroach, it iz our bizzi-
ness and duty, as bug skrewtinizers, tew
show tho critter up az wo find him, with
out caring who hiz grandfather or grand
mother waz.
Thare iz no mistaking the fakt that he
m a . .
iz wun uv a numerous lamiiy, and that
hiz attachment tew the hum uv hiz boy
hood specks louder than thunder fur hiz
affectionate and unadulterated natur.
He don't leve the place he wuz born at
upon the. slightest provacation, like the
tuay ana vagrant ilea, ur the leroshus
bedbug, and until dcth (ur sum vile pow
der, the inveohhun uv man) knocks at biz
mint door, be and hiz bruthers and sis
ters may be seen with the naked eye, ev
er and anon camly clarming the shoogar
bowl or ruaoinz foot-races between the
buttur-plates.
JIaow strange it iz that man, made out
uv dirt, checpist material m markit, and
tfie most plenty, should be so determined
to rid tho world uv every living bug but
himself.
i uon t doubt it be cud hav hiz own
way six years, every personal cockroach
wud bo nocked off from the buzzum uv
the footstool, and not even a pair uv them
left to repair damages with.
buch iz man I
a a k .
lUc cockroach iz bora on the lust uv
May and thi fust Novembur semi-annual
Jy, and iz reddy fur use in fifteen days
frum date.
Tha are born frum en egg, four frum
ccch egg, and consequently tha are awl
twins. I hare iz no sich thing in the an
nals uv natur az a stogie cockroach.
The maternal buz don't set upon the
egg az the goose doth, but leves them tew
Iio around luce, like a pint uv spilt mus
tard seed, and don't seem to care a darn
whether tha get ripe ur not.
But I never knew a cockroach egg tew
fail tew put in an appearance. Tha are az
sure tew hach out aud run as a Kanada
thistle, ur a bad kold.
Ihe cockroach iz uv tew kullers, sorrel
and black. Tha are alwus on tho moovc,
and kan trot, I shud say, on a cud track
and a gud da, cluss tew 3 minnits.
1 hare I ude seems tew konsist. not so
mutch on what tha cat az what tha trav
il, and often finding them ded, in my supe
at the boai ding-house, I hev kutn tew the
kookiusion that a cockroach kan't swim
but tha kan float.
Naturalists hev also declared that the
cockroach has no double teeth. This
an important fakt, and ought tew be
iz
in
troduccd intcw all the primary skule buks
uv Amenka.
Jiut the most jntcrcstmg lecture uv
this remarkable bug iz the luvlyncss uv
tharft naiurs. Tha kan't bite, nor sting,
nor skratch, nor even jaw back. Tha are
so amiable I hev even known them tew
get stuck in the butter, and lay thare all
day, and not holler for help, and aktually
die at last with a broken hart.
Tew realizo the meekness uv thczo un
kumplaining little fellers, let the philo
sofick mind just fcr wun moment com
pare f.hem tew the pesky flea, who lisrht
upon man in hiz strength and woman in
her wcekucss like a red hot shot; or tew
the warbling musketo, wild frum a Nu
jersey cat-tail marsh, with Az dagger in
niz mourn asuinjr lor oiooa: or, uorror
uv horrors I teY the midnight bed bu
who kreeps out uv a crack az still and az
lean az a shadow and hitches on tew the
buzzum uv buty like a starved leech.
Evry man haz a right tew pick hiz
playmates, but az fur me, I had rather
visit knee deep amung cockroaches than
tew hcer the dicing embers uv a single
muskceter's song in the rume jincing, ur
tew know that thare wuz just wun bed
bug left in the wurld, and ho wuz waiting
fur my kandlo tew go out and fur me tew
pitch intew bed.
In konklusion, tew show that I aint
fuleun, I wud be willing, if I had them,
tew swap ten fust-class fleas enny timo
fur a small sized cockroach, and if the
feller komplained that I had shaved him
in the trade, I wud return the cockroach,
and swaro that we wuz even.
flow to Raise a Shepheed Dog.
In tho course of some conversation in re
lation to dogs, Gov. Anderson, of Ohio,
related a Texas practice in training dogs
with, sheep. A pup is taken from its
mother before its eyes are opened,4 and
put with an ewe to suckle. After a few
times the ewe becomes reconciled to the
pup, which follows her like lamb, grows
up among and remains with the flock,
and no wolf. man. or stranger dos: can
como near the sheep, and the dog wil
bring the flock to the fold regularly at
7 o clock in tho evening, if you habitu
ally feed him at that hour.
It is said that Bonner feeds his horse3
from a box sitting on the floor, as he be
lieves it is natural for them to take their
food from a level with their feet. '
NO. 21
From the Bt. Louis Democrat, ?oy. 28.
A HP! RITUALIST? EXPOSED.
For several weeks a so-called spiritual
medium, calling himself C.W.Jackson,
has been holding "seances" in the city,
and giving exhibitions of various kinds of
miracles. , II is principal feat was havinsr
himself firmly bound by the wrists, throw-
iuk tnmsvn juiq a "irauce, ana entering
a dark cabinet, from which ho would
emerge in a few moments with his hands
free. He claimed that he was united by
peopls were simple enough to belfeve hu
assertions. J f
Shortly after Jackson commenced op
erations here Harts, tho illusionist, com
menced his performances as a magician.
JIaftz, being thoroughly potted in all
manner of slight of hand tricks, declared
that there was some juggling about Jack
son s rope performance, and challenged
the bpiritualtat to a trial of skill. Jack-
son accepted, and a few nights ago pre
sented himself at Philharmonic half,
where Hartz was performing, and was
bound with a rope and placed in the cab
inet. He proved too much for Hartz on
that occasion, and after a short stay in
the cabinet, walked proudly fbrth with
the rope in his hands. The Spiritual
portion of tho audience wero in ecstacies
at this proof of the power of the Spirits,
and the great illusionist was rather chop-
laucn. jiartz, nowever, was not conver
ted to the Spiritual faith by this miracle,
and stoutly delared that it was a trick.
His assistant had performed the same
feet on many occasions, and of coarse
Hartz knew how it was done. The anti-
Spriritualist of the audience took sides
with Hartz, and several well known citi
zens offered to bet large sums that thcv
could tic Jackson so firmly that all tho
spirits cf the Seven Spheres could not
10030 lllS D0UQJ.
It was understood that on Friday eve
ning the final test was to be made, and ac
cordmgiy a large audience assembled to
witness the trial, which took place at the
close of the performance of Hartz. A
Mr. Goodwin the same gentleman who
watched all night in the "haunted house"
winter befere last, for a ghost, and saw
only a big rat, appeared upon the stage,
and a lormal demand that the gentleman
who propsed to tie Jackson should come
forward. The gentleman, not being in
the hall, did not come. Mr. Goodwin
said he came as an investigator, and went
into a disquisition ou spiritualism. He
said no doubt how the trial with Jackson
might terminate, it would not shake his
faith in the beautiful philosophy of spir
itualism. He had baa proofs enough to
satisfy himself independent of Jackson's
demonstrations.
Mr Goodwin then stated to the audi
ence tjiat it would devolve upon them to
to select a Committee to tic the medium.
After a few minutes spent in speechifying
umsioner, was selected as one of the
committee. Mr. McBridge was chosen as
the second, - but declining on the ground
that he was not a skilful knot tier. Jenks,
of the Democrat, was elected, and the
committee proceeded to discharge the
duty assigned them. Jackson was sitting
on the stage looking as innocent as a
lamb, and Goodwin appeared to be acting
as his spokesman.
The first thing done by the committee
was to propose to search the medium.
To this Jackson objected, but finally
agreed to a partial search. He was ta
ken behind tho cabinet, out of the view
of the audience, and the search com
menced. In his vest pocket was a horn
comb, some bits of string, two or threo
matches, and some other small articles.
Jenks, who had frequently witnessed the
process of searching at the police station,
soon came across something which excited
his suspicion. Running his hand inside of
the pants of the medium, he seized hold
of the end of a rope and drew the medi
um forward in view of the audience. The
rope proved to be a coil of six or eight
feet wound around Jackson's body at thd
waist, greased with coal oil, and knotted
at both ends. He hauled the rope out,
and holding it before the audience, an
nounced that the medium had come to
the cud of his rope. Jenks asked Jack
son why he had the ropo around his body,
and the reply was, "I guess I have a
right to carry a rope with me." This
discovery created intense excitement in
the audience, and there was considerable
confusion for a time, but Colonel Meyer
requested silence, and tho crowd becamo
calm. ,
The search was continued, and in one
of the medium's shoes was found a small
sharp-bladed penknife. This was another
discovery that caused a murmur among
tho audience
The tieing was then proceeded with
aud it was agreed that the assistant cf
Hartz should tie Jackson's hands,' under
supcrvison of the committoe and the illu
sionist. Jackson's wrists were according
ly bound firmly together, so that ho
could not slip his hands through, qnd he
was seated in a chair and soon went into
his "tranced condition." The doors of
the cabinet were then closed, and amid
profound silence the spirits were left to
do their work, Jackson had complained
that his wrists were tied too tight, but
his objections were overruled by the au
dience, and he was made to face the mu
sic. After remaining in the dark cabinet
about five minutes, ho called out to have
tho door opened, and stepped forward with
his wrists as firmly bound as at first. He
acknowledged that the "influence" was
of no avail, and that the spirits could not
set his hands free. The audience re
ceived tho admission with varied emotion
-the Spiritualist, declared that the man
had not been allowed a fair chance, and
the skeptics rejoicing in the exposure of
a humbug. ' : ' ' :
Hartz was jubilant,; Jackson was crest
fallen, and had but little to say." ;
This exposure revealed ; the modus
operandi of the "Spirits" in untying Jack
son, Ho generally had himself tied with
a rope furnished by himself, and conceal
ed on his person was an exact duplicate
RATES OP ADVERTISING : rtn year j On
Column, $100 ; Half Column, tCO j Quarter Col
nmo, $35.
Transient Advertisements per Square often liaea
or less, first Insertion, $3 j each subsequent laser
tlon,$I.
A square is one inch in space down tbo column
counting cots, display lines, blanks, Ac, as solid
matter. No advertisement to be eonsidered
than a square, and all fractions eounted a full
square. AH advertisements inserted for a less
period ti an threo months to be regarded as tran.
lent.
of that rope. After being tied', it was an
easy thing for him to get the knife out of
his shoe and cut the rope. The cut rope
was concealed on his person, and the un
a. m Z
cut rope was brought lorth and shown
to the audience, and they believed it to
be the rope with which he had been
tied. The trick was a yery shallow one.
hoped that this will bo the last of this
will not be so easily gulled in future.
HARK TWAI3T,
The following paragraph is regard to
the celebrity known as 3Iark Twain, we
find going the rounds of the newspapers:
"31aik Twain (Samuel M. Clemmeni
is a man of about 22 years cf age. sparse
ly built, of medium height, and wears ou
his face a dark moustache. His features
are as fair as & boy's, and in his two eyes
there twinkles boundless humor. He
dresses in scrupulous black pants, test.
and swallow-tailed coat, a small diamond
glistens in his shirt bosom. In lecturing,
he seldom casts a glance on the manu
script on the tripod, but walks listlessly
vu udu iro oeiore ms audience.
A few years ago, Mark Twain that is,
Sam. Clemmcns was a printer's devil, a
newspaper carrier, at Hannibal. He
workedwas a boy of all work in tho
office of his brother,' who published a
Whig paper in that city. He is now &
man of some note throughout the coun
try, but is indebted to nobody but him
self and to the genius with which the
Creator endowed him for his present po.
sition. He has carried out his own desti
ny, and will make it win. He might
have been a third-rate switch-tender to
serve a one-horse railroad, at a country
station but he thought not He is a
good fellow lias "gone in" on his brains,
and will win.
Clay and Randolph. The cause of
the duel between these two distinguished
men, was the following insulting language
used by Mr. Randolph towards Mr. Clay,
in secret session of the Senate, in the year
1835:
"This man (manhood, I crave your
pardon) this worm (little animals, for
give tne insult) was spit out of tho
womb of weakness was raised to a high
er life than he was born to, for he was
raised to the society of blackguards. Some
fortune kind to him, cruel to us has
tossed him to the Secretary of State.
Contempt has the property of descending, 4
but she stops far short of him. She
would die before she would reach him ;
he dwells beneath her fall. I would hate
him if I did not despise. It is not what
he is, but where he is, that puts my
thoughts in action. The alphabet which
writes the name of Thersites, . of black
guard, of squalidity, refuses her letters
for him. That mind which thinks oa
what it cannot express can scarcely think
on him. An hyperbole for meanness
would be an elipsis for Clay."
How to Fit Collars to Horses'
Shoulders. It is very important to
have a collar fit nicely and snugly to the
shoulders of a horse. It enables him to
work with a great deal more ease, and to
apply a great deal more strength. It pre
vents galling and wounding, as the fric
tion is avoided. Collars are made, or .
should bo so made, as to throw the chief
force on the lower part of the shoulders.
The horse can apply but little strength
on the upper part, and for this reason
breast collars are coming greatly in vogue,
as the strength is exerted cn the lower
part of the shoulders of the horse. The
collar should be purchased of the proper
size. They are usually too large. If ob- ,
tained of the proper size, just before put
ting it on the first time, immerse it in .
water, letting it rematn about a minute,
and immediately put it on the horse, be
ing careful to have the hames so adjusted
at the top and bottom as to fit the shoul
ders, and then put the horse to work. .
The collar, by being wet, will adapt it
self to the shoulders, and should dry on
the horse. Wheo taken off it should be
left in the same shape it occupied on the
horse, and ever after you will have a snug;
fitting collar and' no wounds. Valley
Farmer.
To Cure a Cold. The following is
from HalV 3 Journal of Heulth; "The
moment a person is satisfied that he has
taken cold, let him do three things: First,
cat nothing : second, go to bed, cover up,
in a warm room ; third, drink as much
cold water as he can, or as he wants, or
as much herb tea as he can, and in
three cases out of four he will be well in
thirty six hours. To neglect a cold for
forty-eight hours after the cough com
mences is to place himself beyond cure,
until the cough run its course of about a
fortnight. Warmth and abstinence are
safe, certun cures, when applied early. .
Warmth keeps the pores of the skin open
and relieves it of the surplus which op
pressed it, while abstinence cuts off the
supply of phlegm, which would otherwise
be coughed up.
' " .-'.
s Following is an epitaph on a tombstone
in New Jersey :
"Reader, pass on I don't waste your time
O'er bad biography and bitter rhyme j
For what I am, this crumbling clay insures,
And what I teas, is no affair of yours."
A clerical diner is so addicted to scrip
tural texts that ha invariably orders
"Roast beef, well done, good and faithful v
servant" . , . -?;,r..;'
A woman is not fit to have a baby who ;
does not know how to hold it J and, this is ;
as true of. a tongue as of a baby ., . 7
What goes against a farmer's grain,
His mowing machine, '
J
e
A