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About The state rights democrat. (Albany, Or.) 1865-1900 | View Entire Issue (Aug. 25, 1866)
if!!');!; a IV. 1 .4 1 VOL. II. ALBANY, OREGON, SATURDAY, AUGUST 25, 18GC. no;. r EIGHTS TTV "m Tl . JIT Oa TT7N . i A PTT" I I I l7 7 1 ) A i V V 1 41 W .a. r I I i . J I 1 .i ; V V ' i i V J t I ) y; STATE RIGHTS DEMOCRAT. 1SSVKD KVERT 8ATCWPAY, Abbott fc co riTiiLisiiiina. K. n. ABBOTT. M. T. BROWS. JOHX TRATSR8K. TERMS, is adyaxce: Onyeir$3$ Six Months 2; Ono Month, 50 cU. ; Singlo Copies, 12Jct8. j5iT rrment to be mado in aJranco in every Bse. Tho" Taper will not be Rent to any tddreas tenleft ordered, and the term for which it shall be ordered be paid for, Ao dtpnrturt teilt be mad from thr term in ajr owfaae. X. B. TiraeW vrior notice will bo giren to Wach Subscriber'of tho wck en which his ub criptioa will expire, 4nd Unless an order for iU tontinuAnce, accompanied with tho money, be rir.n. thm Puir will bo discontinued to that tddresf. . OP ADVERTISING, per yeah: One Column. $100 ; Half Column, $C ; Quarter Col umn, $.15. Tran-iout Advertisements per Square often lines or le.s, first insertion, $3 ; each subsequent inser tion, $1. Com t pendents writing oreT assumed signatures "or anonymously, must make known their proper i&mes to the Editor, or no attention will be given their communications. All Letter and Communications, whether on buines or for publication, should be addressed to th Publishers. BUSINESS CARDS. Rl ltll MOKKIS, A TTORS'ETd' CO CXSELL Oil A T LA W Ortict in the Court House, Albany, Linn oun ty, Oregon. au!8aolT21y CRASOR. GEO. R. BKLH. CRANOR & HELM, ATTORNEYS AD rOOSELLORS AT LAW ALBANY, Oregon. J. QUIIVIY THOnXTO., COUNSELLOR AT LAW Will practice in the Suirtur and Inferior Corts of weron rt-j OFFICE at bk rwidenee, one mile from Albany. February 17, 1?65. a. hvelat ATTORNEYS AND COUNSELLORS, OREGON CITY. Particular Attention fires f Land Claim and Land Titles. Oregcn City, Ojn., Dec. 10, 15. (SAIlDEXIXtt ! ANDREW G I EG R I EST, Florist, Botanist, Gardener, Or3r3 left at the Eagle Hotel, Albany, will be punctually attended to. .ES Will attend to orders in tb country, or will garden on shares. Albany, April 14. I3W. I o. o. ALBANY LODGE, NO. 4. The Regular Meeting of Albany Lde, No, 4,-T. 0. 0. F.. are held at their iiaii in Nor cross' Building, Albany, every WEDNESDAY EVENING, at 7 o'clock, brethren in gaod etandin are inritei to attend. By order of the J. G. an4 A. F. WHEELER, NOTARY PUBLIC. Albany, Oregon. ITTLL PROMPTLY ATTEND TO THE I? writiatr and takiD? aeknowledcrments of Deed, Mortga ges, and Powers of Attorney. Also, Sepesitioas, Affidiviti, Ac, c. OFFICE In the New Court House. Albany. January 27, 1SS6. , DR. Ci. W. GRAY, SURGEON DENTIST, Late Graduate of the Cincinnati College of Dental Surgery, Woull again offer LLi Professional services totb citizens of this plaee and surrounding country. Office Up stairs in Foster's Brick Building. Resi Uace alongside of the Pacific Hotel. Albany, Augt 11th, lhG5. anglitf OOliDSilllTlI BROS. IMPORTERS AND DEALERS IN WAT HES AND JEWELRY, DIAMONDS, GOLD AND SILVER WARE, MILITARY GOODS, CLOCKS, &c, &c, &c. Ji: 93 Front Street, Portland. PortUnd, Dec. 20, 1865. I K. FABEISH 3. D. B9LMAH PARRISH & HOLMAN PORTLAND, OGN. Heal Estate, Commercial and Stock Brokers, ASD Geiera! Intelligence and Col lection Agents. fiFFICESo. 80 Pioneer Block, Front Street. Portland, Dec. 20, 1865. JOIIxlk FEIIGUSOIV, (OF BAN FRANCISCO, CALIFORNIA,) Will attend in person to the Prosecution of Claims Arising- in Orog-oa and California, And 'to the Settlement of Accounts with the' STATE. TREASURY. WAR. NAVY AND POST OFFICE , DEPARTMENTS. IN THE INDIAN BUREAU. LAND OR PATENT OFFICE. Persons having business 'can have it promptlj attende d to, and obtain information from time to time, if desired. Adbiiess No. 476 SEVENTH STREET, WASHINGTON CITY, D, C. au28 PACIFIC . HOTEL, J. B. liPIcENGlJR, - - Proprietor. mHI3 LONG ESTABLISHED, LARGE. COM 1 modous and well furnished house is main tained as a First-Class Interior Hotel, For the, entertainment of regular boarders and transient guests. The house was almost entirely re-built last year and thoroughly re-furnished with NEW BEDS iieaaing and Furniture. THETABLE Is provided with, every substantial and treat of the seasons. the noor&s rare Are ommoaious and well ventilated. Prompt ooivi .quince ia assured to guests.. The California Stage Company's maU coaches . come k ana go irom me Hotel. Charges moderate, Albaay, Anjuswatfc, 18C5. tfagMtf BY TELEGRAPH. SELECTED PROM THE DAILY" ORKGOX HERALD. Tho Philadelphia Convention. Philadelphia, August 14. Henry C. Dean, Democrat, was forced to resign last evening, Various delegations were in session last evening and this morning, and it seems to bo resolved all around that the Con vention shall be harmonious, Thflro is a paper hero drawn up by President John son, in which he urges all tho delegates to present a bold, harmonious and united front to tho country, and suggests that there belittlo speaking, and that business and action of the body should, as, far as possible, be determined upon in caucus. A meeting of the chairmen of tho re spective delegations hae just been com pelled to decide upon tho officers for tho Convention. Neither Dix, Winthrop, nor Ashman are hero ; and ihc talk this morning i?,that they must take llcndrick for temporary and Duolittle for perma nent President. Tho Convention met at noon at the Wiirwam. It is not finished, and a brief session will be held. Geo. II. Pendle ton is not here, but has written a letter, pledging his support, and saying, that he does not desire to be a leader in it. The Convention organized at noon, with (Jen. Dir, Minuter to the Hague, as temporary Chairman, but the Wigwam not being finished and the weather stor my, there was a comparatively felhu at tendance. A. W. Randall, Pottmatcr General, called the Convention to order and an nounced the Massachusetts and South Carolina delegations coming in arm iu arm, which elicited great applause. Randall then nominated Dix, who made a lengthy speech on taking the chair : he said : There is much in the administration of the government that neels amendment. Some things need to lc dune and other need to be undone. There are commer cial and financial reforms which arc tn dispenable to the public welfare ; but we shall not hare power to carry them out until we change the political com plexion of CongTe.. ( Applanse) Thl should be our immediate aim. (Applause) It ik in the Con:;rc.Kional ditriets that the viul content is to take place. The control of one bdy will enable u to pre vent partial and unjust legislation, and control of both houc with power to in troduce and carry out palutary reforms to bring the government back, in the lan guage of Jefferson Davi, to the Repub lican track. This will coaic sooner or la ter. (Applauc.) " Through harmonious and judicious acting on our part, and the part of thoe we represent, that time need not be long delayed. I belire that pub lic opinion is ripe, and that it is only ne cessary to present to the eop!e clearly the isaues between us and the other par ty which controls the action of Congress. Gentlemen, is not the object for which we are contending a consummation wor thy of our most devoted effort.. (Ap plause.) We will bring back the Kopub- ic punned and strengthened by the fiery ordeal through which it has passed, to its ancient prosperity and power, an ex ample worthy of imitation. We shall chold the grand old reality of a better time, bringing up the memory of our fathers and the recollections of the pa.t, and with the past and the future insep arably entwined, one country, one flag and one Union of equal htates. (Long continued applause.) Gen. Dx then announced that the pro ceedings would bo opened with prayer, and Rev. J. McDonald offered a pray er. 3Ir. Doolittle of Wisconsin, then offer ed the following resolution which was adopted : liesolvcd, That all resolutions and propositions not relating to the organiza tion of the Convention, be referred, by the chair, to the Committee of Resolu tions without debate, and all resolutions, propositions and questions relating to the right or claim ot any person to a t-eat m the Convention, be referred, by the chair to the Committee on Credentials, hereaf ter to be appointed, without debate, and until that appointment, they be laid on the table without debate. ' CoTBTriittees were then appointed as tollows : On Credentials .Tames IJ. Steaman of Ohio, X D. Coleman of Louisana, Thorn as Keynes and Charles P. Daly of Xew lork, David Jvilgore and J. H. Campbell of South Carolina, O. II. Smith of Wis consin, Geo. M. Ord of Connecticut, 1$ H. Pearson ot Texas, Wm. M. Iilair of Xew Hampshire, A. Green of Xew Jer sey, James McFerren of 3Iaryland, and John it. rranklin of Missouri. On Organization Xathaniel S. Little of Maine. L. H. Hubbard of Xew Hamp shire, J. J. Hewitt of Vermont, E. A Al ger of Massachusetts, A. Barlow of Rhode Island, A. P. Waldo of Connecticut, W. H. Ludlow of Xew York, Joel Parker of Xew Jersey, II. M. Tracy of Pennsylva nia, Joseph Jiarr ot Delaware, Montgom ery Blair of Maryland, Thomas F. Flour ney of Virginia, John J. Thompson of West Virginia, M. A. Wright of Xorth Carolina, L. A. Hawkins of Tennessee, Peter Ingram of Georgia, James B. Haw kins of Honda, J. W. Baily of Mississ ippi, J. G. Parkham of Louisiana, James Luce of Arkansas, B. II, Epperson of lexas, Joseph Itamsey or Tennessee, Al exander White of Louisiana, L. A. Graves of Kentucky, G. Fries of Ohio, G..Ross of Indiana, Thomas J. Turner of Illinois, A. A. Stevens of Michigan, W. S. Rice of Maine, L. B. Vilas of Wiscon sin, J. H. Murphy of Iowa, A. Smith of Kansas, Jamuei is. Purdy of California, W. H. Farrar of Oregon, Owen Thorn of District of Columbia, John W. Turner of Dacatah, T. W. Hoes of Idaho, and El wood Evans of Washington Territory. The Convention adjourned at a quarter past one o'cleck. The committees hare been busily at work under tho pressure to get through to-morrow. There will bo no speech making, and tho only question that remains to Imj de cided is whether tho Convention adopt a platform of resolutions or express their sentiments in tho form of an address to tho people. Thoro was a largo gathering of dele gates in tho Xaticual Guards' Hall, this evening, under tho auspices of tho John son Club. Speeches wcro delivered by Governor Perry, of South Carolina, T. O. I'errin, of Xew York, and Postmaster Cleveland, of Hartford, Connecticut. Philadelphia, August 15. Tho Con vention was permanently organised, with Senator Doolittle in tho Chuir. The Wig wam was densely crowded, a largo num ber of ladies being present. Grocsback, of Ohio, handed in Vidian digham's letter of declination. Here cites the resolutions of the Ohio Delega tion, which declare that Vullaudigham is entitled to n seat ; that it would be an outrage to exclude him, and that tho del egation believed in his patriotism and his good faith. Vallandighmu then proceeds to say that he retires to keep peace, though he does not abato one jot or tittle of his long cherished opinions. Ho closes by saying that tho movement here organized has every sympathy of his heart. Doolittle htatcd that it would require the unanimous consent of the Convention to have the letter received. Ruverdy Johnson moved a supension of the rules so that tho letter could be re ceived, and they were suspeuded amidnt great confusion and boisterous demon titration. An the mention of YalUndigham's name the applau-e was tremendous When Cowan's name was mentioned, his presence was the eaucof at leant teu min utes' vociferous cheering. The Committee on Reoliions appoint ed, includes Cowan of Pa., Dixon of Conn.. Raymond of X. Y.. Hendricks of Indi ana, Browning of Illinois, McDougall of California, Reverdy Johnson of Mary land, Garrett Davis, of Ky., Wm. Pigler of P., General Couch of Mass., Tho. H. Beuton, of Iowa, Charles K. Stuart of Michigan, and Chas. A. Kldridge, of Wis consin . The Convention at 11:"0 adjourned until 10 o'clock to-morow, when the plat firm or address will bo adopted. Raymond and Weed have succeeded in managing everything, and Kayuiond will it is said, write the platform. The following is C. L. Vallandigham's letter : To the Chairman of the National Con vention Sir : I have this day received from l he National l.'nion Committee, through W. Groeleek, the Chairman of the joint Ohio Delegation to your Con vention, a ticket of admission as a dele gale from that State. Geo, W. Cook, Chairman of the Democratic IMcgation from Ohio, has alo communicate 1 to me thi morning the following resolution adopted by that delegation : Resolved, Unanimously, by the Ohio Democratic Delegation, that we recognize the right of Clement L. Vallandigham, a duly elected delegate from the Third Con gressional District of Ohio, to hold a seat in the Convention ; that we should regard his exclusion from his scat as an unjust infringement of the rights of his constitu ents ; that we endorse most cordially the purity and patriotism of his motives and his fitness in every way to sit in taid Convention ; yet, for the sake of harmo ny and good feeling in the great end for which it is called, we consent to his with drawal from a seat in the Convention, if in his judgment his duty to his constitu ents shall justify such a withdrawal. i ltlding to my own deliberate convic tions of right, and to the almost unani mous opinion and desire of friends, whose wisdom and soundness of judgment and sincere purity of motives, I may not ques tion, to. the end that there shall be no pretext from any quarter for any .contro verted question or disturbing clement in the Convention to mar its harmony or hinder in any way the result, to the cause of the Constitution, the Union and pub lic liberty, which shall follow from its de liberations and actions, I hereby with draw from the Ohio Democratic Delega tion, and decline taking my scat in the Convention. I am profoundly conscious that the sanctity and magnitude of inter ests involved in the present political can vass in tho United States are tco im mense not to demand the sacrifice-of ev ery personal consideration in the struggle, upon the issue of which, depends as I most solemnly believe, the present peace and ultimately the existence of a free Re publican Government on this Continent. Trusting that your deliberations may be harmonious, your proceedings full of wis dom and patriotism, securing triumph in the end to the great cause in which every sympathy of ray heart is enlisted, 1 am, sir, respectfully your servant. C. L. Vallandigham The following dispatch was received from the President, and greeted with en thusiastic cheers : To Hons. O. II. Browning and P. W. Randall, Xational Union Convention, Tl -1 t 1 1 nr. n rnuaueipnia : 1 tnant you lor your cheering and encouraging dispatch. Ihe finger of Providence is unerring, and will guide you safely thro.ugh. The people must be trusted, and the country will be restored. My faith is unshaken in ulti mate success. Andrew Johnson. Philadelphia, August 15, Midnight. The excitement in regard to the Conven tion has entirely subsided, now that it is known there will be no speaking, and consequently no excitement inside the Wigwam, and that the business will be entirely confined to the passing of reso lutions and the adoption of an address. It is believed that the Convention will adjourn on Thursday afternoon. There was comparatively a small number of vis itors at the Wigwam to-day, the reports being telegraphed to the center of busi ness direct. The Committee on Resolu tions and Address wero still in Bessiop at nine o'clock this evening. It is general ly believed they will agree on tho Ad dress to-night, and that it wi'l bo report ed to tho Convention to-morrow morning, and that after its adoption tho Conven tion will adjourn. Speeches nro being made to-night from tho tho Continental Hotel, at tho Na tional Guards Hall and other places; by prominent speakers in favor of the object of tho Convention. Another great meeting was held at tho National Guards Hall this evening. Among tho speaker were Lewis D. Campbell, of Ohio, and Major Rollins, of Missouri. A gantleman who was present informs us that at tho mention of tho names of Leo and Stonewall Jackson, there was loud and prolonged applause Tho crowd in Chestnut struct has been calling for Vnllandighnia allJft evening, but ho has not appeared ' Col. Forney was serenaded at his office and made a short speech. Alexander II. Stephens has arrived iu town this evening, in company with his brother, Linton Stephens. IIo is the guest of R. J. Arundel on Broad street. There is no prospect that the report of the Committee? on Kesolutions will he made public until the meeting of the Committee to-morrow morning. It is un derstood to bo of a vesy amiable charac ter. Vallandigham will probably be serena ded to-morrow evening. Philadelphia, August 10. The reso lutions and address will doubtless be promptly reported this morning. There has Uen considerable caucusing to have the Committee furnish printed copies of the resolutions to the Conven tion simultaneous with their report. .In deed, an attempt was made in the Con vention yesterday, to pans a resolution to that effect, but it was promptly ruled out. Hays, ol Illinois, -aid he did not ex- pect the Convention to adopt any resolu tion or platform indorsing his opinions, or those of the Democratic party to which he belonged, but h had Lnowu of phi forms W ing adopted in momets of en thusiasm whi.h were afterward subject ed to severe criticism. Governor Perry of South Carolina, aked that nothing be put in the platform to which a Constitutional and Union lov ing Democrat could not subscribe. ( Some cheers and interruptions.) He knew the entment.s of the Democratic party, and believed if ever there was a patriotic par ty in the country it was. During this brief episode, the int of order was raised three times by different gentlemen, and sustained by the "Chair, that there . , . ' I was no question properly be- 1 ii. fore the Convention. It is understood this morning that the platform and additions will be reported in manuscript and adopted, and that a committee will be appointed to call upon the President, and that the Convention will adjourn to-day. The scene yesterday over Vallandi gham's letter demonstrated his popularity and power, and proved that, once admit- V It Sr.tl.l .IS, I.AM.. t . A. .iwt. '.. ....ft k t! .1 , Tii P! society in the South is such as to prevent had been threatened. Indeed, some of j,, , ,. . , , 1 . Vallandigham' more demonstrative sec onds express regret that he did not attend, and all praise the modesty of his frequent refusals to be called out by serenading parties for a public speech. The question is now Wmg actively dis cussed whether Leister Clymer, the Iem ocratic candidate for Governor of Penn sylvania shall withdraw in favor of some one to W nominated under the auspices oi r.c new party. The National Union Convention met in the Wigwam at 10 a. M., pursuant to ad journment. Every scat in ihe building was filled. The attendance of ladies was rreater than on any previous day. The greatest enthusiasm prevailed. The pro ceedings were opened with prayer by Itev. R. Snyder, of Pennsylvania. The President of the Convention, Senator Doolittle, then arose and said : "Before we proceed to business the chair begs leave to announce as the first response to the call for this Convention, the result of the Colorado election." (Cheers.) The following despatch was then read : Denver, Aug. 10. Returns from all parts of the Territory render certain the election of an Administration candidate to Congress. Crowell, of New Jersey, offered the following resolution : Resolved, J hat a committee of two from each State, and from each Territory and the District of Columbia, be appoint ed to wait upon tho President of the Uni ted States and present hmi with an au thentic history of the proceedings of this Convention. Adopted. Charles Knapp, of the District of Co lumbia offered the following resolution : Resolved, That a Committee on Fi nance be appointed, to consist of two del cgatcs from each Stato and Territory and the District of Columbia. Adopted. Gen. Patten, of Pennsylvania, offered a resolution on tho subject ot rcprescnta tion in Congress, which under the rules, was relerred without reading or debate. Cowan, of Pennsylvania, offered the following resolution: Resolved, That the thanks of tho Con vention bo hcroby tendered to Morton 31c31ichael, ot Pennsylvania, for his ad mirable police arrangements during the sitting of tho Convention. Adopted. Cowan again arose on behalf of the committee who wcro appointed to pre pare the resolutions and addiess, and said : UI have to state that after careful and elab orate consideration of the same, lasting all day and a part of the night, we have agreed upen the same. I beg leave to re port the following Declaration ot Pnnci pies, which tho Secrotary will read, and also an Address to tho People, which will be read by Mr. Raymond, of New York. The Secretary then proceeded to read the Declaration of Principles, each clause 1 of which was loudly applauded. The last one which indorses, the President was greeted with prolonged cheers; The declaration of principles commen ces as follows : Tho National Union Convention, now assembled, composed of delegates from every Stato and Territory in the Union, admonished by solemn lessons, which for tho laist fivo years it has pleased the Su preme Ruler of the Universe to give the American people, profoundly grateful for tho return of peace, desirous, as aro a largo majority of their countrymen, in all sincerity, to forget and forgive the past, bringing tho Constitution as it came to us from our ancestors, regarding tho Union in its restoration as tuoro sacred than ever, looking with deep anxiety in to the future as of instant and continuing trial, hereby iKsues and proclaims the fol lowing Declaration of Principles : The Convention met at 10 o'clock, A. M., Doolittle in the Chair. Rev. G. M. Taylor, of Mississippi, of fered prayer. Doolittle read despatch from Colorado, announcing the election of an administra tive candidate for Congress in Colorado. This was received with loud cheers. Cowan, of Pennsylvania, reported res olutions from the committee and subse quently Raymond reported an address, the reading of which report aeeupted one hour. Both platform and address were adopted with enthusiastic, unanimity and repeated round of applause. A National Executive Committee" at Washington, and a committee to wait on tho President with an official report of the proceeding were then announced, and at half past 2 o'clock, the Convention ad journed, iiu:ili with nine cheers forth Constitution and Andy Johnsou. I The Platform or D duration of Princi-ph-s adopted by the Convention thanks God for the return of Peace, and says the war maintained the authority of the Con stitution, and preserved the equilibrium of the States. That the right of repre sentation in Congress and the Electoral College cannot be denied by Congress, nor any department of the General Govern ment. Call upon the people to elect to Congress inen who will admit these prin ciples. DeeJare that certain powers are reserved to States, and among them that of prescribing the qualification for elec tive franchise. Declares that no States can secede from the Union, nor can any be excluded. That States have an equal voice in ratifying Constitutional amend meats. That Slavery is abolished and that enfranchised slaves should receive protection in person and property. It repudiates the rebel war debt. Says it i the duty of government to meet the list e :i tnt oF so . ,-r nm il..ra ntJ lor the surviving widows and orphans. , , T . 1 ,. r;;et Kecojrnize in Andrew Johnson a chief. 1 ,..,... . ,.. worthy of the nation, and renders him i cordial and sincere suppart. The resolutions were adopted unaui- inously. Philadelphia, August 17. Extensive preparations are being made to have the Convention of Southern Unionists, which will meet here in September, an imrosinir a flair : and indications promie a large the condition of attendance, although me jiQiumg oi local conventions to ap point delegates. Hamilton of Texxsand Duraut of New Orleans are here, and Michael Hahn and others prominent in the late New Orleans Convention, are en route. It is understood that the gentle men who come from the South will engage in the canviaH in the Northern States un til the day of elect ion. Members of the Xational Union Con vention are all gone either to Washing ton or their homes. Alex. H. Stephens, who arrived after the Convention began and did not par ticipate in tho proceedings, is yet here. Effort' are being made to induce him to speak in public. The Old Man. Bow low the head, boys ; do reverence to the old man. Once young like you, the vicissitudes of lite have silvered the hair, aud changed the round merry face to the worn visage before you. Once that heart beat aspira tions co-equal to any you have felt aspi rations crushed by disappointments as yours are destined to be. Once that form stalked through the scenes ot pleasure, the beaux of trracc : now the hand of Time withers the flowers of yesterday, has warped that figure and destroyed that noble carriage. Once, at your age, lie possessed the thousand thoughts that pass throuirh your brain ; now wishing to accoraphsh deeds worthy ot a nook in fame, anon imagining life but a dream that the sooner he awoke from tho better. lJut he has lived the dream very near through. The time to awaken is very hear at hand; yet his eye kindles at deeds, and he takes a firmer grasp of his staff. But bow low your heads, boys, if you would m old ago be reverenced. Crawled up his Trousers-leg. A country friend sends us an eastern pa per which contains the following: Xat, a neighbor of ours, is very poor, rather light-fingered, and it is said is not as briirht as his parents would wish." The other day, while passing a neighbor's, Xat saw a brood ot chickens, and imme diately caught a fine one to carry home. IIo had not gono far, however, before he unexpectedly saw tho owner coming up the street; and not knowing what to do with the chicken, in order to conceal it, at last succeeded in crowding it into his hat. But the chick having a longing for liberty, thrust his head up through an opening in the crown of Xafc's old straw hat. Nat Was presently accosted with "W hat have you got in your hat r "Xothing but my head," said Nat, "But' I sco a chicken's head stickin through the top of it, Nat." Nat, taking off his hat, and looking at it in feigned astonishment, replied "Wall, how do you s'pose that critter cot in there : I swear I he must ha crawled up my trousers-leg." 1 The Italian ladies of Xew York are preparing a flag for Garibaldi; Tin? Jinn who Won't Vnj the Printer. May ho bo shod with lightning, and compelled to wander over gunpowder. May he have soro eyes and a ehcstn tit burr for an eye stone. May every day of his life be more des potic than the Dcy of Algiers. May ho never be permitted to kiss a handsome woman. . . May lie be bored to death with boarding-school misses, practicing their first lessons in music, without the privilege of seeing lus tormentors. May 24'i night marcs trot quarter races over his stomach every night. May his'boots leak, his gun hang fire, and his fiahing lines break. May his coffee be sweetened with flics, and his sauce seasoned with spiders. May his friend run off with his wife, and his children be afflicted with tho whooping-cough. May his affianced refuse to rnarry him and her father kick him from the house. May his cattle die of murrain, and his pigs destroy his garden. Maya troop of printers' devils loan, lank and hungry dog hii heels each day, and a regiment of cats caterwaul under his window each night. May the famine stricken ghost of an editor's baby haunt his slumbers, and hiss murder in his dreaming car. May his cow give sour milk, and churn rancid butter; in short, may his daughter marry a one-eyea editor, hi business go to ruin, and he go the ture. Legisla- N:nvor;s Mk.v ami Pat Men. The nerves are the objects of systematic enmity and depreciation among mankind at large!. Fat, however it may excite complaint in the fat person, is not, I be lieve, ar object of enmity, except in an an omnibus or in some position where it occupies an unusual portion of the planet ary space. Prophetic denunciations against such as be fat in Zion are on record ; none against such as be nervous. Yettheifat man is tolerated, loved, at won-t laughed at; while the nervous man is not orjy' laughed at, he i disliked. But is it fat that has been the chief bene factor of the human race ? Was it a fat man that invented printing? Was it a fat man that discovered the circulation of the blood? Was Gerge Stephenson fat? Were the marytrs very fat men? Heli ogabalus was. but was Antonius ? Julias C;esar, though for his own aelfl-h end-? hc preferred fat men about his person, was he fat himself? Was Hampden a " a .union; as Vrom- well? Was William III.? No : it was rgc the IV. who was the fat man, and j he built the fat pavillion at Brighton. M bu,u lnc ,at Charles James Fo tded. I alstaff wa x was fat, but he gam- was fat, but he was not a rcspeciauc cnaracter. Jiamiet; again, was fat; but he believed in ghosts, and was a very undecided youns man. The fattest man of modern times is a distin guished undertaker he may make good coffins, but I am not a judge of coffins. On the other hind, is Mr. Tennyson fat? Is Mr. John Stuart Mill fat? Is .Mr. Gladstone fat? Xo; the nation would not trust its income with a fat man ; it knows better. The only fat fancier I overheard of was Mr. Hudson, the rail way king. Thus, it is with nervous men we trust our money, and it is from nervous men that we expect all that makes money worth having. Or if this statement be too wide, let it be met by contradiction there are plenty of contradictory people in the worm ana the oincr siue nave too lonjr had it all their own wav and have too long been permitted to treat the nervous as not miserable in themselves, but the cause of misery to others. The Argosy. Radical Piety Illustrated. In a discussion last Thursday, in the Com mon Council of Philadelphia, a member y the name of Hancock is thus re ported : Mr. Hancock "I would go down into hell and break the ashes of tho grave to teach the attorney who would go South to defend Jeff. Davis tho contempt in which the peoplo of the- city hold him I would have Hilham B. Reed there that every flapping shred of flag may re mind him of the shrouds of his murdered victims. Mr. Kctzel I move to include Thad Stevens. Mr. Hancock Well, I only say that with Thaddeus Stevens I am heart and hand, f Applause.! I belong to his band. There is only one thing left in the land now, and that is tho flag ; and I trust that we will ever hallow a day that shows us how despotism was broken up. Such un uuhallowed idea as Jeff. Davis beinsr Ipardoned is preposterous, and oucht not to be entertained. If I would see a triaitor going to heaven, great God I would go tho other wry. He "would go the other way," and, we dare say, in doing so ho would take the most direct route homcv Laughter. I don't like a cinder this kind of laff is like the dandylion, a feeble yaller, and not a bit of good smcl about it. It is true that any kind of a laff is better than none but giv me the laff that looks outuv a man's eyes fust to see if the coast is clear, then steals down into a dimple, and rides in an eddy thar awhile, then waltzes a spell at the kor ners uv his mouth, liko a thing uv life then busts its bonds uv buty, and fills the air for a moment with a shower of silver tongued sparks then steals back with a , i . 1 x !l ? X4 Il smno to us lair, 10 wai6 agin ior ua pruy This is the kind uv latt that 1 luv, ana aint afraid uv. J osh Billings. The St. Paul, Minnesota, papers report the arrival of 700 Norwegian emigrants in that State in one lot. They were taken from Milwaukie by JUr. Wm. K. Has berg, a Xorwegian gentleman of the State whe takes special care of hia countrymen who set fheir faces toward the New World v JokIi ItlllingM to the ilrW. ' Deki: Gunxs: Keep cool. A blessed fulur awaits yu ennoy how. Takd Icjsfcons on tho piahny at onct; piannas are' get ting fckarsc, by awl means larn tu play the nu song jist enm out, "When pfoh'n Brown is over we are Father Abraham; curoming with this cruel war " Kevefal strong." This stanza tuk thd 'Crati pre mium at the Stato fair. Don't be afradd tew get married ; your ma wan't afrade. Lira how to knit puddin bags to pucynro haircini Bjs tarluous and pretty; FAt fdait pencils j they will hiake you gpry at figgurcs. Eat kolone water; it will pake a good smcl. Let your petticotes jdraw on the side-walks, and if any man jtjfeps on them and tars oph the rim, slap hrs choTs at onct. , " ll you have got small feet, keep 'em hid small feet has gone out of fashion;.' Study travel; Tom Moorcs and Byrona and Gullivers and Wandering Jew3; "and Vallandigham iz awl first rate. If yu kan spare the time, be lovly and sweet. Remember one thing, thar aint nuthin in this life worth livin fur but a rich hus band; if yu dont believe me ask ynro ma. If you hav red haire yu had better exchange it fur black, tha tell me it iz goin to be worn muchly uext year. Dont hav cnything tu dew with the boys, '.un less they mean busncsg. If yu dont knbw how to skect, you might ez well jinc! Rome traveling nunnery at onct, for y are plaid out. L- Heaven. A living divine V says: "When I was a boy I thought of hcaveri as a great shining city with vast walls, and domes, and spires, and with nobody in it except white tenuous angehj who were strangers to me. By ana by my little brother died, and I thought of a great city with walls, and domesj, and spires, and a flock of cold, unknown 'an gels, and one little fellow that I was ac quainted with. He was the only one I knew in that time. Then another brother died, and there were two that I knew; Then my acquaintances began to die, and there two that I knew. Then my ac quaintances began to die, and the flock continually grew. But it was not till I had sent one of my little children to hU grand-parent God that I began " to think I got a little in myself. A second went, a third went, a fourth went, and by that time I had so many acquaintances in heaven that I did not see any more walls, and domes, and spires, I began to think of the residents of the celestial city And now there have so many of my ac quaintances gone there, that it sometimes seems to me that I know more in heaven than I do on earth." It may be interesting at; the present time to institute a comparison between the present Prussian army and that of the Great Frederick. On the 6th o . June, 1781, that monarch held a re,vietr of all the regiments of the Prussian army, both eastern and western . divi sions. It then consisted of exactly 50, 000 men. The strength cf the Prussian army of to-day is between 000,000 and uu.vuu. - ' A young lady having "set her cap' fbt a rather large specimen of the, opposite sex, and having failed to win him,! wa& clhng her sorrows to a couple of heB confidants, when one of them comforted- her with these words: "Xever mind, Mollie, there is as good fish in the sea as ever was caught." j ' "Mollie knows that," replied her Utila brother, "but she wants a whal." v The extent of the lumber trade in soma sections of the country may be judged from the facts that a "drive" 35 biles Ion 2 is coming down the Madawaska river in Canada, and that the raft boom on tho Susquehanna river, above Williaiasport, extends six miles, and contains 60,000 logs, which, when sawed, will yield o00,- 000,000 feet of lumber. " A band of outlaws lately went to a farm-house in Overton county, Tennessee, and forcibly took the farmer, named Guntcr, to the woods, stripped himand were whipping him, when his daughter heard his screams, and seizing a hatchet, she ran to the rescue and killed two of the ruffians and wounded others, and lib erated her father. i A strancre case has just transpired in one of the courts at Chicago. A gentle man has been compelled to sue out a WTit of habeas corpus to get possession of his Wlie. llio writ is uirecieu iu iuu wubs mother, who is charged with unlawfully detaining the lady from the home of het loving husband. Two horses in Greenville, Pennsylva nia, standing about a rod apartis wer both struck by the same bolt of lightning, a few days ago. . One of them. had hi9 head smashed to a jelly; the only mirk visible on the other was a small hole in the back of his head. r : ' ; i Here's the Fellow 1 In respect td the false calves which the ladies, are ac cused of wearing, the editor of the Mon terey Gazette says: A spotless and sym metrical hose, whether it Contains 'real or saw-dust, demands the homage of all men. . "What is that ?". said the - Sunday School teacher, pointing to, the letter Qi "Dunno," said the urchin.' T f! ;J "What do you say when you stub jour toe?" . . : ; ;;i "D n it," was the precocious replyv t ...."'; .' " ?---" ; Colorado reckons on 1 ,250,000 bushels of wheat this year-OjOOO acres at SO bushels per acre. . '.-I ; There is no vice so simple but assumes , some marks of virtue on its outward parts. "- The stories that colored troops, offer ed their services to the Jcniaus is . now denied. " 5 ' ' 5 V ,-' f"