Image provided by: University of Oregon Libraries; Eugene, OR
About The Albany register. (Albany, Or.) 1868-18?? | View Entire Issue (March 14, 1873)
8 ALBANY REGISTER. PUBMSHKD KVKBY FKIllAY. Br COLL. VAN LEVI;, IN REGISTER BUILDINGS, Comer Ferry and Fir$t SlretU. TERM8-IN inVANTE. One year Three dollars. Six months Two dollar. Single copies. Ten cents. ADVKRTISESlj RATES. Transient ndvertlsements, por squnre of ten lines or less, first Insertion fi; each siiliueqrtont Insertion $1. lwr sdver Uwments Inserted on the most liljcrol terms. JOB WORK. (laving received new type, stock of col' ored inks, cards, a itonlon Jobber, etc., we are prepared to execute all kinds Of print ing in a better manner, and fifty per cent elieuper than ever before offered In this oity. Agents for the Kctffoter. The following gentlemen are authorized to receive and receipt for subscriptions, advertising, etc., for the Rkuistek : Hiram Smith, Harrisburg. O. P. Tompkins, Harrlsbnrg. Peter Hume, Brownsville. W. R. Kirk, Brownsville. J. B. Irvine, Scio. T. H. Reynolds, Salem. h. P. Fisher, San Francisco. l. P. Porter. Shcdd's station. Cbss. Nickel), Jacksonville. HTMOROIW. Which would you rather, that a lion ate you or a figer? Why, you would rather the lion ate the tiger, of course. "Well, wife, rou can't say I ever contracted bad habits." "No, sir; you generally expand them." "Mother, here is a grammatical error in the Bible." "Kill it! kill it ! it is the very thing that has been eating the leaves and book marks !" A Louisville merchant wants the contract to supply Brigham Young's family with crape and bombazine when he dies. "Well, Pat, Jim didn't quite kill you with the brick bat, did he?" "No, but I wish he had." "Why so ?" "So that I could have seen him hung, the villain !" "Mike, will you come in and take a drink ?" Mike looked at the man for the space of half a minute, and then, rolling his eyes upward, very softly said : "I t'ot it was an angel spakin' to me." A Trojan canine recently swal lowed 825 worth of National cur rency belonging to his master, who wants to know if there is any use in ending the animal to the Treasury Department tor redemption. "My dear," said the sentimental Mrs. Waddles, "home, you know, is always the dearest spot on earth." "Well yes," said the practical Mr. Waddles, "it does cost me about twice as much as any other spot." A compositor in a Southern print ing office was escorted home the other night by a squad of dogs. The only remarkable thing about the occurrence was the rapid time made. An Irish housemaid, boasting of her industrial habits, said, quite in nocently, that she rose at four in the morning, made a fire, put on the kettle, prepared the breakfast, and made all the beds "before a single soul was up in the house." A Montana man ottered to bet his wife $100 that she couldn't swal low a hot marble. She told him that was too thin he couldn't get rid of her that way ! He says he dind't think she was so darnation cute. 7"he editor of a Wabash paper want" to know if "the man who sent him a challenge to fight a duel means business," or whether his buz zard soul laughs at the ghastly joke. "Do you like to go to church ?" said a lady to Mrs. Partington. "Law me, f do," replied Mrs. P. 'Nothing does me so much good as to get up early Sunday morning, and go to church snd hinr a popu lous miuister dispense with the Gos pel." A traveler in Texas was invited to drink at stop lltuwu whore he had stopped, he wys; "I woke up next morning and t!.mtd myself on top of a lay-stack, my honeeftt ig from is it, uwi , frith ny out. on, anu myself with both trw in serted tbrvag', !,e KUrrun:. of my in. . i.t . hiaUUie, B'JU mo SimiljJIu..;Uli ny neck, a a i-ecku?." HEi'IPKS. To Clean Gold Chains. Put the chain in a small glass bottle, with warm water, a little tooth powder, and some soap. Cork the bottle and shake it for a minute violently. The friction against the glass polishes the gold, and the soap and chalk extract every parti- cle of grease and dirt from the in terstices of a chain of the most in-1 tricate pattern ; rinse in clear cold water, wipe with a towel, and the polish will surprise you. Those who are about to travel for a few days are sometimes puzzled ' to know what kind of cake to take in the haver-sack for a lunch by the way. Such will find the following most excellent and substantial : Journey Cakes. One pint sweet cream, half teacup of sugar, stirred into coarse flour to' form a stiff dough, roll out to one-fourth inch thick ; bake in quick oven. Apple Short Cake. To one quart of sifted flour add two tea spoonfuls of cream tartar and one of soda, half a teaspoonful of salt, quarter of a pound of butter, sweet milk or cream enough to mix it. Have the dough rather stiff, roll and bake in a sheet. As soon as baked, split open the who'e cake, spread one piece quickly with- but ter, cover with well-sweetened ap ple sauce, pour over some thick sweet cream, grate on nutmeg; place the other halt on this (crust side down) spread with butter, cover the apple sauce, cream and nutmeg. Farmers' Fruit Cake. Three cups of dried apples, wash and cut each piece into three pieces, then boil in a syrup made of two cups of sugar, half a cup of water, two tablespoonfuls of essence of lemon, until preserved through and tender. He very careful not to let it burn. When cooked sufficiently, take off and cool : then add one cup of dried cherries, three cup of rasins, two cups ot sugar, half a cup of brandy, one cup of butter, six eggs, one teaspoonful of cloves, nutmeg and cinnamon, pulverized and mix ed ; flour to make a stiff batter ; bake one hour. Ginuer Cup Cake. 7hreecups of flour, one of sugar, one of mo lasses, one of butter, a tablespoon ful of ginger, one teaspoonful of soda, and three eggs ; bake in pans. AJpound of stoned and chopped raisins is an improvement. Plaix Custard. Three well beaten eggs, one pint of milk, three or four tablespoonfuls ot sugar, stir well together and bake twenty minutes. Pie crusts are usually so full of shortening as to be unwholesome and the undercrust is like putty, cement or salve. Here is a recipe for a fine crust that will be tit to eat. Goon Pie Cri st. Sweet cream made into a soft dough with either fine or coarse flour; bake immediate ly in a quicK oven, wi l make a good crust for any kind of pies. A gentleman was once riding in Scotland by a bleaching ground, where a poor woman was at work watering of linen cloth. lie asked her where she went to church, what she had heard on the preceding day, and how much she remembered. She culd not even tell the text of the last sermon. "And what good can the preach ing do," said he, "if you forget it aii r "Ah, sir" replied the jHtor wo man, "if you will look at this web on the grass, you will see that hp i fast as ever put the water on it the sun dries it all up, and yet, sir 1 see it (rets whiter!" "Well, David," said a poor, but worthy citizen, to one of our city magnates, "the world has prospered with yon, and they say you are im mensely rich." "We!!," replied David, "perhaps it, is true ; but we cannot take our gold with us when we go.' "ft woulJ niuit if you did," was the quick retort. pTawMLfi IK liJtf.inr in. or, ,.el toUeco oniony. DKY GOODS, ETC. P. C. HARPER & CO. i TITl" Wifii t.VkX'V Ti r ATT. Tlttf AT ; V T tout ion ot t in- public to our huyv and wt'll soici-ieu STOCK 01 VT?T1?D A T VJliiJN -faK AL MERCHANDISE consisting of thr latest ami most (tuition able styles of DRESS GOODS! TRIM.WXUK. LACE COLLAR. MIAULS, LAt'EN, KMlinOIDEKY and Fancy Xotions. In the Gentlemen's Department we offer the latest stvles in rLOTHIXli, the best in ITXIU'.llWEAl!. the nobbi est TIES and St'ABFS, the nicest GLOVES and ("lAl'XTl.ETS, and the "ton" in HOOTS & SHOES, while onr MILK HATS are all the rage. We keep constantly on hand a full as sortment of SHOT O-XT'N'S, SlIOT-l'OlCHKS, GUN-TUBES, POWDER, FLASKS, SHOT-BELTS, POWDER, SHOT, CAPS, in the hunter's lino. in fret, evervthiiii! Our Mirrors & Picture Frames embrace all sizes and styles. In the line of GROCERI HH S , Crockery, Glassware, Fruit Jars, POCKET & TABLE (TILERY, Malls, Tobacco, Domestic Goods, &, WOOD a WILLOW WARE, our stock is full and complete. 63T CALL AXD EXAMINE GOODS. f3 rooter's Bnildluir, First St., Albany. P. C. HARPER & CO. MARBtK WORKS. MONROE A STAIGER, Dealers in Monuments, Obelisks, Tombs, Head and Toot Si one, Executed in Vtrmout and California, Kalian Marble. SALEM, OREGON, BR VH 71 PHOP AT ALBANY. REWARD FOR AN Incurable Caset XDR. UE RICHATJ'S COLDEN BALSAM! After ten yean trial on tola Cowt tua proren Itself the only carat! to in a certain clau rf diseases prono trocarl bySMdieal practition ers ae incurable. Dr. LeBicfaao's GOLDEN BALSAM Ko.i enree Chancres first and second stages, Bores on, the Legs or Body; Bore Ears, Eyes, Nose, c.i Copper-colored Blotches. Syphilitic Catarrh. Diseased Scalp, sod aU primary forms of the disease known an Syphilis. Price, 15 pa: bot tle, or two for $9. ( Dr.Leliehu'i GOLDEH BALSAM No.2 ana Tertiary, Mercurial, Syphilitic Rheums, ttem, Pains In the Bones, Back of the Neck, TJ1, oersted Sore Throat. Syphilitic Bash, Lumps and Contracted Cords, Stiffness of the Limbs, and eradicate all diseases tram the system, whether caused by Indiscretion or abuse of mercury leading the blood pun sad healthy, Price, iS par bwtUe, or two tor $9. Dr. Le Man's COLDER SPAHISE AH- tldote, few the dure of Oonnorhcoe, Gleet, Irrt. tattoo, Qrarel, and all Urinary or Genital, disarrangements. Price, $0.80 per bottle. ( Dr, Le lichas'g GOLDEN SPANISH IX- Jectlon, awash and injection for serers cases of Oonnorhcse, Inflammatory Gleet, Bftlelures, and aU tUeeeaM of the Xidnsya and Bladder. Price, 1.M per bottle. 51 Also Amntt far D& IE BICHATT'S ClOlDEf PILLS Tor Seminal Weakness, Hight Xml. sloas, Impotency, and all diseases arising from kCasturtoetlon and exeessiYe abuses. Price, f3 per bottle. The genuine Gouox Bsxisat it put np only In round bottles. On receipt of price, thee medietas will bs ssnt to all parts of tha country, by express or mall, securely peeked nd free boat obser- Tsaou. Bole Agenta, 0. 7. BICBABOS k 00. k oo. mjr sta aad TT srA Wholesals sad Bstail Drogglsta tad mnetaeo.gti. $1,0011 PATH XT MEDICINE lit ..iii A IfitfOiilK Kl I TtkV Vinegar Bitters are not a vile Fancy Drink, made of Poor Rum, Whisky, Proof Spirits and Refuse Liquors, doctored, spiced, and sweetened to please the taste, called "Tonics," "Appetizers," ''Restorers," 4c, that lead the tippler on to drunkenness and ruin, bnt are a true Medicine, made from the native roots and herbs of California, free from all Alcoholic Stimulants. They are the Great Blood Purifier and a Life-giving Principle, a Perfect Renovator and lnvigor ator of the System, carrying off all poisonous matter, and restoring the blood to a healthy condition, enriching it, refreshing and in rlgo rating both mind and body. They are easy of administration, prompt In their ac tion, certain in their results, safe and reli able In all forms of disease. No Person can take these Bit ters according to directions, and remain long unwell, provided their bones are not destroyed by mineral poison or other means, and the vital organs wasted beyond tho point of repair. Dyapepaia r Indigestion, Head ache, Pain in the Shoulders, Coughs. Tight ness of the Chest, Dizziness, Sour Eructa tions of the Stomach, Bad Taste in the Mouth, Bilious Attacks, Palpitation of the Heart, Inflammation of the Lungs, Pain In the region of the Kidneys, and a hundred other painful symptoms, are the offsprings of Dyspepsia. In these complaints it has no equal, and one bottle will prove a better guarantee of its merit a than a lengthy ad vertisement. For Female Complaints, in young or old, married or single, at the dawn of womanhood, or the turn of life, these Tonic Bitters display no decided an influence that a marked improvement Is soon perceptible. For Inflammatory and Chronic Rheumatism and Gout, Dyspepsia or Indigestion, Bilious, Remittent and Inter mittent Fevers, Diseases of the Blood, Liver, Kidneys and Bladder, these Bitters have been most successful. Such Diseases ere caused by Vitiated Blood, which Is gcnerally S reduced by derangement of the Digestive nana, or Skin Diseases, Eruptions, Tet ter, Salt Rheum, Blotches, Spots, Pimples, Pustules, Boils, Carbuncles, Ring-worms, Scald-Head, Sore Eyes, Erysipelas, Itch, Scurfs, Discoloratlons of the Skin, Humors and Diseases of the Skin, of whatever name or nature, are literally dug np and carried out of the system in a short time by the use of these Bitters. One bottle in such cases will convince the most incredulous of their curative effects. Cleanse the Vitiated Blood when ever you And Its impurities bursting through the skin In Pimples, Eruptions, or Sores ; cleanse It when you find It obstructed am! sluggish in the veins ; cleanse It when it U foul; your feelings will tell you when. Keep the blood pure, and the health of the system will follow. Pin, Tape and other Worms, lurking In the system of so many thousands, are effectually destroyed and removed. Says a distinguished physiologist: There Is scarcely an individual on the face of the earth whose body is exempt from the pres ence of worms. It Is not upon the healthy elements of the body that worms exist, but upon the diseased humors and slimy deposits that breed these living monsters of disease. No system of medicine, no vermifuges, no anthelmtnitlcs, will free the system from worms like these Bitters. Mechanical Diseases. Persons en gaged in Paints and Minerals, such as Plumbers, Typesetters, Gold-beaters and Miners, as they advance in life, are subject to paralysis of the Bowels. To guard against this, take a dose of Walker's Yimiuak Bit tubs twice a week. Bilious, Remittent and Inter mittent Fevers, which are so prevalent In the valleys of our great rivers through out the United States, especially those of the Mississippi, Ohio, Missouri, Illinois, Tennes see, Cumberland, Arkansas, Red, Colorado, Brazos, Klo Grande, Pearl, Alabama, Mobile, Savannah, Roanoke, James, and many others, with their vast tributaries, through out our entire country daring the Summer and Autumn, and remarkably so during sea sons of unusual heat and dryness, arc in variably accompanied by extensive de rangements of the stomach and liver, and other abdominal viscera. In their treat ment, a purgative, exerting a powerful In fluence upon these various organs, Is essen tially necessary. There Is no cathartic for the purpose equal to Da. 1. Walkek'8 Vink 04B Hittkks, as they will speedily remove the dark-colored viscid matter with which the bowels are loaded, at the same time stimulating tho secretions of the liver, and generally restoring (he healthy functions of the digestive organs. scrofula, or Klnfe Evil, White Swellings, Ulcers. Erysloei etas, swelled neck, Goitre, Scrofulous Inflammations, oils. Indolent inflammations, Mercurial Affections, Old Sores, Eruptions of the Skin, Sore Eyes, etc., etc In these, as in all other constitu tional Diseases, Waijuh's Vimcoar Bit tkks have shown their great curative pow ers in the most obstinate and Intractable Dr. Walker's California Vine car Hitters act on all these cases in a similar manner. By purify lug the Blood thoy remove the cause, ana by resolving away the effects or the inflammation (the tubercular deposits) the affected parts re ceive health, and a permanent can it effected. The Aperient and mild Laxative properties of Da. Walxis'i Vinioab Bit ters are the best safe-guard in cases of erup tions and malignant fevers. Their balsamic, healing, and soothing properties protect the humors of the fauces. Their Sedative prop erties allay pain in the nervous system, stomach and bowels, either from inflamma tion, wind, colic, cramps, etc riweUonsv-Takt of the Bitters on going to bed at night from a hah to one and one-half wlne-glaaafuL Eit good nourishing food, such as beef-steak, mutton chop, veni son, roast beef, and vegetables, and take out-door escrciie. They sis composed of So "'uit68 ln",,'ei" and contain R. h. McDonald ce Cen- Aft. Ban Francisco. CaL, of. Washington and Charlton Sta., kTr7 HOLD BY ALL DRUGGISTS DaULUUL R. R. Rs Jfl Tlnnrlrr Tlnlinf 101 CCMS THE WOKST PAINS IN FB0M ONE TO TWZ5TI MINUTES. NOT ONE HOUR After reading lata ai wttaMaat end aaf oa. SUFFER WITH PAIN. RADWAY'8 READY RELIEF IS A CURE FOR EVERY PAIN. It wm tht first and It THE ONLY FAIN REMEDY Tiwt initantly itopi the moit xcmciiln paint-, alUrt IoflauiuiatrOBt, ud (Drw Coagttlot)s, wtitthwr of l tuniji, SUmuwh, Boweli, or otbi Rludiororgu, by tuw appficatloii, IN FROM ONE TO TWENTY MINUTES. Ni rntttfr bow violator anrntatlBf tba pais Hi RHEUMATIC, IM-rlddcn, fiiflnn, Crip pltd, Ntrrou., Nauralgtc, or prottraUd with dlwaM May Mtftr. . RADWAY'8 READY RELIEF WILL AFFORD INSTANT (AST. INFLAMMATION OT THE KIDNEYS, INFLAMMATION Ot THE BLADDER, INFLAMMATION OF THE BOWELS, CONGESTION OF THE LUNGS. SORE THROAT, DIFFICULT BREATHING, PALPITATION OF THE HEART, HYSTERICS, CROUP, DIPHTHERIA, CATARRH, INFLUENZA, HEADACHE, TOOTHACHE, NEURALGIA, RHEUMATISM, COLD CHILLS, AOl'E CHILLS. TbtappltcaUoaof ih. KEADV BELIEF lo d part or parti whm tkt pala or difficulty .xliu will afford mm ud comfort. Twenty drop, id half a tnmbltr of water will la a few momenta cure CRAMPS. SPASMS, SOUR STOMACH, SICK HEADACHE, HEARTBURN, DIARRHEA, DYSENTERY, COLIC, WINO IN THE BOWELS, and all INTERNAL PAINS. Tra.elm ikcnld alwan carry -a bottle or Had. waj'a Heady BaUef with tbem. A few dropa la waUr will prevent ikanue or paint from t-bang. of wafer. It U batter than French Brandy or Bitten at a etiumlant. FEVER AND AGUE. FEVER AND AU UK cored for fifty nnta. Than I not a rtmedtal agvnt in thie world that will cure Fr. and Airtte, and all other Malarious, Billoua, Scarlale Typhoid, Yellow, and other Fever, (aided lv RAD WAY'S PILLS) k quick ai RADYVAY'S READY RELIEF. Fifty nnta per bottle. Sold byDruciiliU. HEALTH! BEAUTY!! STRONG AND PURE RICH BLOOD -INCREASE OF FLESH AND WEIGHT-CLEAR SKIN AND BEAUTIFUL COMPLEXION SECURED TO ALL. Dr. RAD WAY'S Sfflpli Besolvent HAS MADE THE MOST ASTONISHING CURES; BO QUICK, SO RAPID ARE THE CHANGES THhf BODY UNDERUOES, UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF THIS TRULY WONDERFUL MEDICINE, Every Day an Increase in Flesh and Weight is Seen and Felt. THE GREAT BLOOD FLiUFlER. Irery drop of the SARSAPARIIXIAN RESOLV ENT communicate, throngh the Blood, Sweat, Urine, and other Aulda and julcee of the lyitem the vigor ai lire, for it repair the waetei of the body with new and aonnd material. Scrofula, Syphilu, Coniumptlon, Glan dular dbeaee, Ulcere la the Threat, Mouth, Tumora, If odea la the Glandi and other parti of the tyatein. Bora lyee, Strnmooe Dbcharfee from the Ban, and the wore form: of Skin dleeaiea, Eruption., Fever Bom, Scald Head, Ring-Worm, Salt Rheum, Iryalpelai, Aeae, Black Spell, Woruu In the Fleah, Tnmore, Cancere la the Womb, and all weakening and painful diechargea. Night Swwata, Loan of Sperm, and all weiiee of tha life principle, are within the curative range of thie won. der of Modern Chemtatry, and a few dayi' ute wiU pro to any pereon uiing It for either of tbeeo forma of dieeaea he potent power lo cure them. If the patient, dally becoming reduced by the vraitaa and decompoeition that It continually progreaaing, eae teedl la arreting lone wast.!, and repair! the eaoa with new material made from healthy blood and thie the SARBAPARILLIAN will and don ear ore. Nnt only doea the SaBiariau.ua RiaoLvairr exeat all known remedial agenta la the cure of Chronic, Bcrofnloaa, ConatlteUonal, and Skin diaeaaei bnt It a the only pollUve cure for KIDNEY AND BLADDER. COMPLAINTS, Urinary and Womb dlieawi, Gravel, Dlabotea, Dropae, Stoppage of Water, facontlnence of Urine, Bright1! DUv eeae. Albuminuria, and In all eaeei where there are brlckdait depoalta, or the water la thick, cloudy, mixed with aubelaacee like the white of an egg, or thr'eadi Ilka white illk, or there ll a morbid, dark, bllioui appearaaca, and white bonedutl depoalta, and when there li a prick lag, burning aeniatlon when palling water, and pain aa the Small of the Back and along the Lome. Price, .0O. WORMS. jTheMjkriowa and lure Remedy for WORMS Tumor of 12 Years Growth Cwrrvt by Batluiay'i MetotvenU Dr. RAD WAY'S J perreeiiy umiee, elegantly coated with iweet gun, P"1i J?Ku'tai purify, cleanie, and Mrengthen. Rad way'i Plfla, (or the cure of all dliorden of the Stomach, Liver, Bowel., Klilnevi. Rl;uider. Ner,,. rxu Headache. Coaallpalton. Coativeaeii, Indlgeillon, fya tT Blltetuneil, Blllou Fever, Inaini!,alion of & ftwela, Pilei, ud all DerangemenU of the Internal Vtoeera. Warranted to effect a pceltlve cure. Purely uAaadragl? n0 m,K"'ri ailnerali, or deW- A few doeee of RADWAY'8 PILLS will free tat tyilem from all the above-named diwrden. Price, fa cent, per boa. SOLD BY DRUGGISTS. ' READ " FALSE AND TRUE." Send one letter J"E, t WO CO.. No, 3S Warren Street, Sew York. Information worth thouaaudi will be read HOLLOWAY'S Erery Man his ovn Ptiysiciaii 0-A.tTTIOlSr- ' THE ImmartM demand for H0LLOWAY"8 1 PILLS an! OINTMENT has tsnptsa 3iu paxvtaa woouuuntll wage) yaiir- In order to proUo tha puhllo and ouraeiwa, we bars iaauad a new " Trads Mark," eooaist lngof aa KsTptian circle of a serpent, nith the Utter Bin the centre. Every bos of (to uine Boixowat's Pills and Omraut win have thie trade mark oa It j uoae are geuln without it. Jl. Y. Chimnul Co.. Sole rroprleton, 7t Maiden Una. New Ytsk. ciiANfc & nv.u;.n, si;(ii V-vnelftco, Cslt tlj Holu Ak( ins for the Pacific Oosss.