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About The Albany register. (Albany, Or.) 1868-18?? | View Entire Issue (April 12, 1872)
VOL IV. NO. 32. rVBLIhlil I) I.VMtV KATt'HBAV, By COLL. VAN t'LEVE, IN REGISTER BUILDINGS, Comr Frfry itn-t Vint V r-iU, TKItJis One year . six moulha Single copies IN AllVANCK. Throe itoHam Two 'loi'ais. Tl'll cents. ADVKUTlSlSiH KATES. Transient :i Ivertlscinenl I, pc s(imiv ;' ton line nr !--. llrsl Milisciptem iiiscritiin : ttiMJincnfs Inserted on tOS'lllS. I. 1. I lie khi ?:: cm n ir t"t elver. LUOdt lilM'lllI Bl'SINKSS U A It US. ! JOHM CONNER, BANKING AND Exchange Office, ALBANY, out :;.. .mil utnuc. Having receive'! new tytx'.itocii ore 1 ink", tin- l.-.n inif '"n .1" lire inviiaivl in In -x in n iH'ttc Cheaper than city. nf col ic'., we all kln'ls of nrlnt- timiincr. nn I llttj' per cent :vcr before offere 1 In till" DKI'OSITS HKCKIVKI) RtTUECT To cheek m $M. Intents! ulbmwt Oil timcileiMi.iiH in mlii. l'.v lianu'c on i'lirilmi'l. Son r'ninrisco, mill New York, lor mile l knretsl ra.es. I 'nlliv: ions lini'lrnnl pl'nnmlh remitted. Refers in H. WYCoructt, Hcnrv Pulling, V. s. Udd. ILinkiii r boars frmn s A. M. to 4 I. M. Albany, Fell. I, W7l-iivil As'i-iiH for the RefrjMter. Tlie followtlia jsimtlemon arc nuthortecil In receive ami reeclpl for milmcHimolw, aJTcrti-in;. etc., for the I!o;i.-tkk : fttmtn Smith, lian'lslinrjr. ii. I'. Tompkins, IInrr1bni",f. Peter lliiine, llrowici ilk-. W. 1(. Kirk. Brownsville. J. II. Irvine, -cio. ''. II. Kcviinltls, Salem, 1.. I'. r'islier, Sill Kilinelseo. 1. I'. Porter. KlieM'ii Station. ,21 Fletcher . Wells, Bucnii Visln, Polk o tlms. Nirkcil. Jacksonville. p... Bjm v.ij.mmm'm . ' Hl'SINKSs HARM MAHlil.i: WoliKS. ! NOE!OII & ST.UHr.il, Henleis in Moninneiils, ObelMw, Tombs, Ileiul tint! Foot Stones, Til Story of Two Hoys. lit IXl.A WIIKKI.KII. I sat under a tree in the Park, read ing a iHmk. one warm suimiier day. ami two hoys, ten or twelve years old, perhaps, wi it playing together Oil a grass olot, at a litti'e distance. I knew I hem hy sight, well. Ope was Harry Walters, tin- -on of a lawyer; the otli er Timothy (i raves, the son of a dry goods iiiemiaut lit'th liriglit. inlelii gehl lads, with ire h young faces, and neatly clad. After a time, having tired themselves out wllli raring and jumping, and wrestling, they threw themselves down upon the grass, mi ller the shade of a tree, bill a few feet from win-re I sat, to rest and elmt. "i suppose yon are going away be- lore lonir? I licaru itniry say, , qlle- "Xo,' added, -when a hoy has mh Ii linn and line nlea oi right and wromr as Ham hail, and sill liiseompauionVjeersoiilv make him tinner. Im is sure to turii out well. And when a dov show preferemv for low things, and U-gins io iaiK aiiimi rue oiti man. and atleets the ways ot loalers. he is iireltv mm to grow upa mlscrahle altliir, unless Home strong, healthy Influence is liroiiht to hear against thee hielina tioui;, "line, my Ineial said, "falwavs feel sorry wl.cu I luaranv Ikiv talking admit Hie old man, when he means his father: and if hoys only knew it. thev id ways tall in the estimation of grown ijcople when they do it. It is onlv loafers and rowdies who SpDlml iiiein. sum ii is rar netter to win Hie approval of a true man, or woman. than a rowdy. But many bov fail to V young reiideis, never let anv one hear you call your father the m mmi or tlie ytrftrmr. Stah e.xpresions are oniy nr tor rowdies; mmemuer that, no matter who you hear use them. Ezeunted in l, I s., I'hJ siel.m "."I kKKH'KiiK I nr;' on, Albany, Or. It: sol "I'll Ml Kor main (allftirnia, Verniniil Maible. and Italian oril. Is '. X. ES5H HAS ON HAM) AND CONSTANTLY reirlvlnit u luote stock oi Urorertva and. Provlalooa, Wood and willow ware, to'iaflco, eltnirs, coiifrs'lioiwry, Vnnkesi imllons, etc., etc., wlMiinsnleiiiul ii';hI1,oiikisIi U.I . Hill Son's drn store, Alluui.v, oix-on. Iv4 j. . Mi r m i. i.. ' N- w.M'll. MITt MUBiL & DOBJ'U, Attoriiej -and t'omiacloiMi at Iw COI.li ITOIIs I N 1 II AM 'EU V AN I Plioi -n lorsinii liniilllt.v. Otllee over tlie old ihhi qlfteo, front atrect, Portland, Oregon' Iv4 SAI.EM. OUEfiON. J, C 1NAVK1.L. 1.. I I.INS. POWELL A i JX, 1 1. is mid 4'oiniHt'lors ill Law, Nil sol.lt I lolt.-, IN ( IIANCEHY L. Kiinii lioiarv pulilicl, Aifany, o.esoe. I'olleetiiniMiliil eonve.Mliloi's prmuimj temled t". A' i K. II. OH A.Noll. . n. llt'HFHKKY. MltlirV I'nlille. 1 C'RAXOlt & Hi TIlPItilKV, Attorneys nnI t'oansellor at Law, Al.lSANY.OUKi.oN. Office In I'arrlsli hrlek, up stairs. 5v4 CSEO. V. UUY, it l 1 KAIU A I I-: lK 1TM IN- VI tin t i lletital 'oi. makes S i- ,nl X wamt lm tm it N ill' i til I'lu "' -1''-(.eid Tilth. 111!, dma all work In thu line of hi iroles(nii in bast ami most nppiove l inetliot! risisoaiitile ni es n uan lie lut-1 S'ltrouHO.xlleadiiilnlslered lor the pain less ext met ioiioi leeth If desired, oniecin l'urrish hrlek liloek, up flairs. Itesldeno' ilrsi house mint hot I longiuaallonidclutrcli, troaiing on lourl huitse hiock. j7Ms IIIIA.M II SIIOI AT ALIUS Y. i, now. ai'BAXB. WOW & CRAKE, lien lei's in Boots, Shot!, and Finilhi AI.ISANV. OHEtiON, INVITE THE ATTEMTOX (VP THE 1 pnlillc lo their lull s.is k of the latent stile in gentlemen's and youth's boots. sluies, gutters, l IMonl ties. ele.. etc.. us well us to the very la'.esl Ihlng out In the line ot Indies' and misses' guild's, Imlinorals. Newu't lies, Antoinette buskins, ajitl many oiliw new and Btsluonable styles, ui iwelvlKl at the City Boot Store, wlilch tliev will sell us inpidly us they inn llnd puivhnsers who w ish llrsl-ilnss jjisids at the limit rcusouaiile njlcs, TIm'.v respect fully Invite you lo nuno unit see their stis'k. lino's'. slKKK.ete., minlbor tiqialrad tuonler. mi l nil KW lOirmnfccl. C1TV BOOT STollE, P1HST STKEET, I'lrot door West or Hegisl , r llnllil'jc I7v3 . D. II.l. KM IE A Volt TO KEEP CON. stunt iy on hand n lull supply oi I he . lit lis lsi' here. W. . JO.XES, M. O., BOMEOPATBIC PHYSICIAN. OKKU'E ox ratal STltEET, ONKdonr west ol lliiMXitnin, in lliii'khiti'i's two story hrlek (up stall's, over (Iwi. Terrell's store. It ii IU..N4 . turner 8ixlh and Per ry streets, Alimny, Oregon. iltr7l LEFFEL A MVEHS' Water "Wlxeolis SPIiKBICAI. FI.I MKS. And tilencral mil Miu'hlnery. CITY MARKET, FIRM' KTRKET, ALIIAM , ORMMIX, J. L. HARRIS, l'ltOPHIETOlt, ! ItrlLL EX I IE A Volt ALL IiIMI'i OF MEATS, 1 Which Will 1' of the very licit quality. .' The highest market price paid for beeves, hogs and sheep. -I I'liird dour wen of Fern , on south side of t'lrtll stns't. .1. U HAKHI9. Albany, Pee. j. lsil-llvt .1. W. Van Uvn Berttli H. WORM IMM'IOH, I SALEM : : ': OREGON. MY lon experience In diseases ennsed b WOHMS, mnnot Is' snrjiasmsl by anv pliysielaii In Europe or the United s iites. tntiiir rooms, Xos. Wand 39, over the list OllU-e. I'onsullatlisis and examlmtl Ions rnr H thiirue. ttUXf mil Albuii 'olUiiit' Inatilutc, ALIIAW, OKSA.OX. SIvJ ' V. BACKENS'i'o. Agent, Aiinuiv. ureiron. 30 DOLLARS WAV To MAKE ASH FEMALE AliEXTS. j To Introduce the celebrated $2S.OO Buckeye Sewing Miiehliie. OTPTCII ALIKE oX BOTH SIHKS, ASH llti'tili- Nlnillle vewin-j inuilliur 111 the I I'nite l sluies licensed tonne the celebrated Wilson feed sold for less ihnn $40, and aek iiowlelKef by all to Ixithe liest family in iiiuelilnel for liuhl or heavy sewhiK, In Hie market. Out lit five. Addivss K. K. MI NEK ft I'll.. Hen. ..gts.. SOv.'lif Alliiniy, oiegon. 'IMIIS ISST1TI TIOS WIl.t. UKOPKXOX" L Monday. septemlH-r I, ls"l, with a corps of tenebers eapanie mi l enrnesi. insiriu-. Hon will lie lUOTOIwh und pnu-liral, and the - M -in or order imHiirfiuiiscd. forpar- lleulnrsa Miwm It. K. W A It It EX, A. M.. President ; or. Boy, E. It. (IKAKV, Dt !., Albany. The Eyca! The Eur ! DU. T. L. diOLDEN, Oculist nud Aurist, Alimny, Orcein, ALBANY BOOK VH'OBtF. FtnbllNh( d In I Will. K. A, Freelaud, vl'.AI Kit IS KVEliV VAKIKTY OP 1 laisceilanuoits IhmiIim. school hooks, blank Ismlis, stiitionery. Books hiisirte;l to order at short notice. Albany, Dee. S, is7o. TijiixrAG - Ti'Rxixci. i. i Dlt. ROtPEN IS A son of the noted old oplbnlinle doctor, S. C. Hidden. 1 Dr. (iolden bus had experience in treating i the venous ni'Siises io I which tlie i'vr tout em-are sutiieel. and feels eoiittdent ol giving entire mulslaelloii to I hone who may place ibeinwlvct under bis care. April K OH. B If I AM PIIKPAHKD TO HO ALL KIM S of turning: keep on bund and make In order rnwhldc-licttouied chairs, und spin nlng wheels. Shop near the "Magnolia Milk" JOHN M, MMzft;il Albany, Nov. H.lislW vSJl WB. E. O. SMITH, DENTIST, HAS I.OCATKH IS AL Inny, und is now ready to wull on the ell lens of Al lunviind vlelnltv.witlianew Invcutiou In dental vork. It consists In suisiit log t He pin n the innnt hull bout ...i i iiiii nit: n iiiiiu nun, iv iici'uh,mv. Those wishing nrlltlcial teeth are regnest. ed to call and examine for Ihenimdves, Also, piutes moiuled. whether partially broken ordivldod. Teelb, ext meted with out pain. OfMee over TurrellV slore. All work warranted. 7v4 V M'.. w,"WOBH will give prompt I . allciilloii to all orders for Van liuiigliig. laleemlnlng, iHxsimllng, ie.. In nlscttv or vie hilly. All work executed In the West style, in the liest manner, and at lowest living rales, ftjrorders fcft at FuraltUni Wnrensinis ofCha. Menlei' will receive prompt attenUoo, J)Y . tioniulv. as they sat down. Timothy shook his lien.il sau I he. "o:'M echoed Harry, surprijetl. "J thought you snltl, a few weeks a'o. that you were ffoiiif! to visit vour cous in in (,'linton, this summer." "I tTttl, bill the old man thinks 1 had j better j;n to school this sununer you know it lieglns next week and make i tny visit next 611." "Who thinks so?" queried Harry, t with n lixik of wonder anil surprise on his round fresh fair. Timothy lauglied a little pout peons- j ly. "Why the old man or the old , yKHlltuimi, I suppose you think I should say. hut I can't always stop to tie so particular, you know.'' Still the look ot wonder and surprise ; did not leave Harry's lace. "Hut what old gentleman do yon mean?'' he asked. "I didn't know there was any at your house.'' Timothy shouted. '"Ha, ha ; ho, j ho!" he cried. "Ain'l we green, j though! Why, 1 mean the. yocerwtr, I my hoy. if you like thai better. Xow, I do you know?" "The governor!'' Harry repeated, I slowly. -I have hoard that young : horse-jockey, .hick Jones, call his fath-1 cr that. Is it him yon mean?" "You are Just right it is." Tun re sponded, shipping his knee, as he laid seen older hoys do, "I mean my res peeled daddy, and nobody else." The look of wonder on Harry's face changed to one of unmistakable dis gust. "I would he tuiJIomw to call my fath er any of those names," he said. Timothy Inuidied iijiaiii, boister ously. "1 suppose you would always, say my AoHoiW wrtif," he sneered. "Yon would ; oh. ye talk." "Xo. shouldn't say that," Harry gait), calmly. "I should say my nffar, or just father; hut I would sooner al ways call him an honored parent than to use such words as, uld mun, or joe rwr," "Oh, to he sure you would !" Tim responded, a little Scornfully, "But you see as Imys that hoys grow old er, they get over such notions, and fol low the fashion. Tlx- lahion is. now. to say Hie i, or Ihc old gsin'oidtl, or the goreruor. You call hike your choice." "Well, it's a mean, low fashion," Harry cried, spiritedly, "and just (it for jockeys and loafers to follow; but ti boy who has any self-respect, or any respect lot his father, will never sneak of film in that way. I know. never would dare look anybody in the face, lifter I had spoken so of wg futlier." "Oh, well, you arc green and spoon ey." Tim said, disdainfully. "You'll aet over such girl-notions, maylie, un less you're a regular muff. For niv pari I think it sounds a great deal more manly, to hear a Mlow any the governor or the old gem'man,' than futlier urn papa, 'flint's for girls to say." "And I'm very glad I'm girlish enouirh to keep from being a rowdv, .1 ' t.l S.J, ... iiicii. ii.iiiy n.,1,1. jjlOUIIiy. " would sooner lie called a mutt, any time, titan a rowdy, anil that Is what any hoy is, who calls his fattier the old man.' Tim Itmglieil, w ith an air of affected age. as he sprang up from tlie grass. "Oh, well, old fellow, we won't tight over that," he said. "Yoo can nayfatlitr all you please, and I'll any the old man. Xow. for another race." They were off like (he wind, forget ting hi a moment their little nilsuudor stniKlitlg, and pcrtiapi neither of them ever thinking of it again. But I did not forget so easily. I determined to keep tnick ol these boys, ami I did. T left tlie city soon alter, and did not re turn for ten years. One of the first questions 1 asked on retltriihfae was: on to ilewn .....i. ...... ........ i . . . T I vi oa .riin i n i inn tin tiiii'i' " ; '?"" .,":"y ers wilb kilometres in the Crimea, in La njrl table Munderx orwrltera and 'lIOH. The amusement afforded hy IikII crotM typhographleal errors wiil he ill exanstible while printers are fallible and editors write with abominable in difference to legibility. One of Ihc urns astonishing blunders of this kind was committed some years ago in an editorial in the Bulletin. The writer, wlio had cautioned his readers against "casting tlieir K'.lrls iH'fotv theswhie, " was amazed and grieved to perceive that the compositor had warned the public against "eating pills before sun rise." 'I his was corrected lit the proof, hut the reporter who declared of a cer tain new store that had "sixty fancy windows," was. even more Indignant than the rtotvkeeuer when he saw In his paper tlie statement that the establish UH'lit contained "sixty faded win dows." And then there was tlie poet, in Muncy who 'sought to smooth the wounded feelings ot a bereaved family by publishing in the local paper a io etlottl tribute to the deceased daughter, Kinlly, in which he declatvd thai "we will hallow her grave with our tears." He was pursued next morning hv Kmi ly'i) extispi-nited brother beuuise the printer insisted that "we will harrow her grave with our steers." The poets suffer most deeply. Noth ing could I worse, tor instaiiee, than the misery to tin; banl who asserted, in his copy, tliat lie "kissed her under I know how girl bovs I the silent siars" only to find that the ' eoiopositor compelled him to "kick her under the cellar stairs." A cer tain Jenkins, also, was the victim of all aggravated assault, because when. In his report tfa wedding he decjtired that "the bride was accompanied to the alter by eight bridesmaids." the tyis's made It that "the bride was ac companied to the alter by tlaltl brltles- oi.iius. i nese iniiigs tire peculiarly uiipleaaut when they occur in remark's upondcjith ; as in the case of Hie editor, while writing a sympathetic paragraph obicrvedthat "Mr: Smith could lianl ly Itettr tlielossofliis wife." only to tintl that the printer Itad made it "Mr. Smith could hardlv hear such a boss lor. tt with." Kven more deplorable is the injury to the journalist who complimented ii ccrtiun caudidatc witlt the ohservatiiMi tlwthe Was "a nob!,, old burgher, proudly loving his native State.'r Im agine the indignation 0f tlie candidate ! anil the horror of the ,..ntr i,,.n the I lwijer the next day contaitierl tlieasser-1 tion that tlie said burru r was "a noli- i by old burglar, prowling around in a naked state. Hut printers do ot make all the mistakes. We remember the laughter and comment provoTted by the state-: ofa provincial reporter, who ! called tlie attenti0 pf the constable to 1 the tact tliat "o Sit.idav last some twenty or thirty mu 0.,V,.rte (H the hothir-lmk f Thinaru. UMini ,l : I lie Aea of the Prealdeula. As so many of the yonnp; men of tojlay aiv luipiiig ami striving to achieve greatness and poNtibly as pire to Kuli liigli places in the land, it may 1g ofintcrett, if nut gmitive ly consoling, to know that those who have held the noblest position, known to our form of government, attained it late in life. Particular ly is this true ot President Harri son, who was the oldest of the Pres ident, Iteiiig sixty-seven years of ago when he was elected. That courtly and elegant old gentleman, President Huchatifiii was sixty-live when lie Uvame Chief .Magistrate, and next to him in point of years, was Zachary Taylor, the hero of lincna Viskt, andtheeleveirth Pres ident of the I nited States. John Adams, Washington's successor, was sixty -one, as also was Andrew Jackson, anil both .Madison and Monroe and also John Quinov Atlams were hftv-i'ight when they attanicti presidential honors. ash- lligton, .letlerstin and Martin an Bnreii were each tity-sevcn, and James K. Polk was forty-nine. Franklin Penrce was next to the youngest, being forty-elgllt, while the present incumbent, U.S.Orrtnt, was forty-seven at the time of his inauguration. Of the three Vice Presidents, Tyler, Filraore ami Johnson, tlie former was liftv-one. the latter fifty-nine, and .Mr. Fill more was fifty. Tim f Ait i' i: nik it's Diikam. A poor man was a canicntcr ; ami he often said to himself ami others: Mf I was only rich, I would show people how to give." In his dream he saw a pyramid of silver dollars till new, bright, and beautiful. Just then a voice reached him, saying : 'Xow is your time, i on arc rich at last ; let us see your gener osity." No lie rose from his seat and went to the pile to take some money for charitab'e purposes, lint the pyra mid was so perfect that he could not war to break it. He walked all around it, but found no place where he could take a dollar with out spoiling the heap. So he de cided that the pyramid should not be broken ! and then awoke. Me awoke to know himself, and to see that he would lie generous only when comparatively jioor. WWfwH'i fight i morning.' ig during the whole Mediums' back must have been uncommonly birse. imring tin- Kranco-Prnssianwara givtit deal 0f f,m was pokw, !lt , .ev Jersey editor who read in the cable dispHtche that "Bnzalne has moved twenty kilometres out of Metz." lie thereupon gat down and wrote an ( il'i'L'" Khku 1,0 ?"W I was de liglrKar that all the kilometre" had been ,,,,1 and the Iniimwit people Of Mete were no longer cn fiigew!t1 ),y the presence of those dev wm engines of war sleeping upon a vohtann. ,,s it were. And then went A Gt'tLTV Consciknck. The eccentric Lorenzo Dow was onoe approaching a place where he had an appointment to preach, when a stranger complained to him that his watch was stolen from under his pillow the night before. Dow as sured the victim that the watch would be restored, and picking up a boulder that weighed a pound or so, hid it under his cloak and enter ed the jut' pit. After preaching zealously for half an hour or so lie suddenly exclaimed : "A man's watch was stolen in this neighbor, hood last night, and the thief is now in this house. I sha'l hit him with this stone." He made a feint of throwing it, and one ofthc audience ducked his head. He was instant ly seized, searched, and the stolen watch found in his oeket. I'ntirv of CiiAWTKit. Over the beauty of the plum and apricot there grows a bloom and beauty more exipiis He than the fruit itself a sort, delicate flush overspreads its blushing cheek. Xow. If you strike your hand over that, and it is once gone, it is gone for ever; for It iievefjrrows but once. Tlie flower tliat hangs in the morning, iin M'tirliil with dew. arrayed with jewel" once shake it so that the bends roll off. and yon may sprinkle water over it as you i ilea ;e. yet it can never be made again w hat it was when tlie dew fell light ly on it from heaven! On a frosty morning you may see the panes ofiduss covered with UtttUmpet, mountain-, lakes and trees. Iilemled w ith a beautiful fantastic picture. Xow lay your hand iiimii the glass, und by tlie Watch of your linger, or by tlie warmth of your palm, all the delicate tracery will be obliterated. So there is in youth a beauty and purity of char acter, which, once' touched and defiled, etui never be restored fringe more delicate than frost work, and which, when torn and broken, will never be re-embroliiem). When a young man leaves his father's bouse, with the blessing of his mother's teats still Wet iiK)n hi fnrehend, if he once loses that early purity of character, it is a loss that he can never make whole again. Such Is the consequence of crime. Its effects cannot lie eradicated; it can only be forgiven. All Rioht. -We have frequently heard these words when on the railway train, spoken by the conductor to the engineer, when the train hid Stopped and was just alkint to start forward again, The careful engineer will not move On until ho hears the exclama tion from the trusty attendant, "All right!" bet in think; these words mean a great deal, if we will make a wise ap olictitiou of them to our course of life. How Is tliaf? Ail-we on the right track, and are we sun- that We are moving on safely? Many of the tlioiightlessand reckless are nphlng Info evil and sure punish ment, till from the want of Inquiring liefore they start. If all is right. So has many a youth been drawn into (Imj ways of tinnsirrcsslon. not rcali.inir that he went there but to saerlHee his ha meter mid all Hint, made life, worth possessing. very hour we live brings before in stu b fearful examples. All is not right at the starting noint. The beginning is made in error, and ealaiu- itv and destruction come. Young render, look out, and see that in all llfes undcrtak'niir; von start right. See that you keep "till ri,r)it'' a?yon move on. And then von mar he tuiile sure of coiuinir nut ri"bt in the end. lie not deceived. Solomon say-: '"There Is a way tliat seemetli rijlht unto man. hut the end tliereof are the ways of death." Take heed! Seek for the right wav. Pray as did the Psalmist to Ootli "bead me ill the wav everlasting. All is right there. Myrtle. sup Timothy (iraves f "Oh. they are Largo boys, now," laughed my friend. "Harry Walters was twenty-one a fctr days ago, ami was admitted to the bar. He is an uncommonly fine young man, and Ms liitla-r Is very proix-rlv proud of Him. There is no young man in the City wilii finer prospects." "Ami rim r" My friend shook his liead. "I Can't say as much lor lum. be said. "I wish I could: but he's a spendthrift. and a ne'er-do-well. It is struma, too. He and Harry went brought tip to- irciher, almost. Koth mid good, steady parents; they attended the same school, ami had the same advan tages. Vet Harry went up, and Tim down. He seeks loafers and rowdies for compinlons. and has almost brok eu hi uarents' hearts with his outs- duct." i "4 knew It would be so' I oricrii Kv friend looked npraHs.iwdlngir.! ;"Howlid vou know it?" I- .4 MM him the conversation t neaf l Between the- two !)'. ten years fao fore. "I iMcrvr kuew It tat taiV" I w hich ooo of them exnhalctl and blew a frigate out of tlie water. Another Aiitnr crlpptsl from an ex .cltjmge an obituary tK'm, which he sent to the axitposlng room, with some iiitrtaluetory remarks. He said: "We paKshh below a vetv touching produc tion from the pen of.Miss M . It was written hy her at Hie ik-afh-fHs! of her .sAlOtexttllotboi-. iHHl it overflows with f IlKH nVIINidjbvnJ . , f II!..1 ..(!'....:.... which the natural outgrowth of pure j 'ric"tl w,me old Wllie nroi out iiiitiitonxtgenliM tlutt litis Oevelotetl a very small quantity. The latter, fHMieathtWMetVrirtg loflnenee of a ' takinl' the ulass and holding it "Why," said once a fox, walk , ing on the river side, ami seeing . the fish merrily playing along the ' watery element at times, and hastily taking to their flight at others, I "Why do you Hec V" "We flee the nets that men spread around ! us," was the reply. "Why, then, ; tlo you not come up here, on dry t land, that we might play together, as my forefathers, in oldon times, I were wont to do with your tore- fathers ?'' "Subtlest of animals." j rcp'icd the lish ; "If in our very clement of li'e so many dangers threaten our lives, how much more have we to tear out of our ele- incut A close-fisted fellow, treating a motliers love. Tlie reader will observe ".VW&lUm wfth ardent allec Hon and fendcrest mrret." CI I 1 . . . . ... . . aoiiicuow, in aiiaenitig this Introdlic- I abovo his head, remarked, rather skeptically : "You say this is forty veais old ?" " Yes," said the host. tion to tlie poem, the editor turned up "Then'' reioiiiod his friend, "all I .i Z. . w have to sav is that it is very smaii tlie conseniieiiii. ma Ik. b, tt.,.. "",c w ' lwl tlie reader gently Into an article njion "Hog Cholera in Tennessee." It wa rumored that tin- relatives of Miss M wa seen prowling around tlie office tlie next day. armed with shot guns, but this has not been traced to ny reliable authority PhtlwMpkla Sprkadop tih: Word. The Bible is read of a Sabbath in all the lo.tlllj pulpits ot our land. Tlie sun never sets on Its gleaming page- It goes oqiwdly to the cottage oi the plain man and the palace of the king. It is woe en into literature, and ir colors the talk of the street. The hark of the merchant cannot sail rosea without it. Xo ship of war goe to the conflict hut the Hihlc is there. It enters men's closet : mingles in till grief and cheerfulness of life. The aching head liuds a softer pillow when tlie Bible lies underneath. It blesses us when we are born ; gives names to half of Christendom ; rejoices with us; has sympathy for our mourning; tempers our grief to finer issues, it is the belter part of our sermon. It lifts man above himself. The timid man. awaking from his dream of life, looks through the.glasjof Scripture, and his eve grows bright. He does not fear to stand alone to tread the way Unknown and distant to take the death-angel hy the ha nil, and hiil farewell to wife and babes at home. Men rest on this, their dearest hope. It tells themofOod, and of hi beloved son ; of earthly duties and of heavenly rest. -. - . - . ... Alphose Karr, the gardener poet, has offered a but) mat to the World. He wtts lately present at a banquet given by the disciples of Hnlineinaii. 'roast '.'ere given to the health of every me dical celebrity hy everybody, when the President remarked, "Monsieur Karr, you have not promised tlie health of any one." The poet rose and iiiikI estlv replied, "I propose the health of the'.sick." for its age." A toper sneered at a young man for wearing spectacles, when the tatter said, "It is better to use glas- over the nose as I do, tliati un- ' dor Uw nose as, rondo!'1 A saloon kectternt questionable hon esty went To a lawyer to cwtMilt him altottt commencing an action of defa mation against a fellos-townsman. "The scoundrel," said he, fiercely, has robins I me of my character.'" Ah? has lie ? are yon sure of that fact?" replied the attorney; "if so, for heaven's snkelct him go ; for It is Hie luckiest thing that ever happened, to you."' A Maine gentleman once called on. President Qdeoln. He had shaken hands with him observing: "Don't be scared, Mr. Lincoln, 1 do not want on office." "Is that so?" said the. President; "then give iw another shake." Mrs. Partington says she does wish; they would hurry up and pass the sil ver service bill iu ushlhgtoii. They say female compositors get through tlieir copy Viry rapidly, beuisr anxious to get the lat word,,