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About The Albany register. (Albany, Or.) 1868-18?? | View Entire Issue (Feb. 23, 1872)
VOL. IV. ri I'.l.lMIKIi KVEaV BATIIIDAY, By COM. VAX CLEVB, IN HEGISTSS BUILDINGS, Con ' Ftiry owl sirH. TERMS IN AUVANCK. One vcafrn r..7Trr. Tlirce ilollnrs. Mxni'iiitlK Two dollars. Single copies Ten ce nts. AliVERTIsiNi; RATES. Transient a Ivertlsciucnls, W" wiu..re ';f ten Ittuw or less, ili"t Insertion Winieli subscipie.nl Insertion II. iJir:-:- iclver tlsmiieut liworic-l ou ilie Biosl lilicral terms, .1(111 WORK. Hnviwji revived new type, stock of col- oroil Inks, cards, a Ijurtwi tollber, etc.. we ave nrriwa-l tocjcciitrallhlrclsnf Print line In n better manlier, iin'1 liny fm rent cheaper than over belon own in tlih city.' Agents for ibe Itcjclsler. Tlie following gentlemen W nuthorlzH to receive una receipt for subscriptions, rJviTtlniux, etc., for the irtaii.-iTtu: Illram Smith, Uarrlsbnrg. . p. Tompkins, llurrWinrg, Peter Ilium. Browns hie. W. 1!. Kirk, Brownsville. K. E. WhccW, Scin. T. ii. K-vnoliI. Snlein. j, p. li-lier. Sim Fronrlsen. l. I'. Porter, f-htn station. Fletcher a Welts; Bncna viva, I'oik to (.'has, Nukoil, Jacksonville. BUSINESS GAUDS. I. B. UICE, M. I'hysiciiin mid Nnrircoii, Albany, Or. Ot t ice ou tub somi MDfi ur m atx arm. April, ISttKB X. S. I1' BOIS HAS ON HANI) AND CONSTANTLY receiving i'"'-'' stoofc "f lirocerles ami Provisions, Wood an.l willow ware, tnlmcco, cigars, confectionery, Yankee notion, etc., etc., wholesale anil retail. opposite It. C. Hill A Son's drug store, AHuuiy, Oregon. Iv4 j. it. mitciu l.i.. m i.i'n. , B1ITC11EIX & DOLP1I, Aitornej'ii mill Counselor! nt Imk, (H.ICITIIItS INCH ANt'KKY AX 1 I'llOt - lorn In ailmlnilty. Oilk-e over the old post ollle('i Front treet, "intiainl. Oregon. IV4 ). C. ItnVKI.I.. t. H.I.NN. POWELL A FL1VX, AKorm-SH Ki.d '!iuseIors t S.n-.i, ASH SOL1CIT0K8 IN CHANCERY (L. Flint! notary pnlilic', AUnny, orc'-on. Co(lecl ioiu-ianil i-onveyaueea promptqi at taiulivl to. 1 K. II. I'll A Nolk .n. n. iit Mi'iiitrv. Milarv Public. CRAXOU & JllJIPttilEV, Attorney and Coon.-ll.trs lit Law, ALBANY, oraaioN. Offlee In Plirrtsh brick, up stali-s. r.yt ' UEO. W. GllAX, D. U. P., t RADl'ATE IF CIXC1X H nntl Oental Oollege, makes S'tymt .v wami in miaviI A'lcit PI4ttM Ar- t.ii. i.,) T.-th ilk.. Al.l. ,i,irL- iii ill). H,,r. ni lik HenlWflStnn in I be bosl and most approved method, and at as reftSOItablO rates as can Is laid elsewhere. Nitrous Oxide administered for the rutin lesseximctionof teeth Ifdcslreil. Otnoeln Parrlatl iirlek block, ui) siuirs. Realdenen Hist lioitsesoutliof CoiHti-ogntlonalcliitreh, fronting on court house bloelt, J7Ms W. . JOXK.S, M. B., UOBIEOFATBIC FBTSItilAN. i OFFICE ON FIRST STREET, ONE door west of Ilroadulbln. In Burkhart's two , story brick (Uvtairs;, oyer titsi. Turrell's j store. itRUiiENCK-i orner nxn aim rer rv streets, Albany, Oregon. Ur71 LEFFEL & MYERS' W a,tor"V7"laools .srilKRICAI. FLUMES, Ami Uenernl Mill Maelilnery J. F. BACKEXSTO, Agent. Albany, Oregon. r,ivj 30 BOIXARS A BAY TO MALE AND FEMALE AGENTS, To introduce the celebrated $23.00 Biiclirjc Sewing Muclilni. TIT('H ALIKE ON IlllTII SIDES, AND Otlieolv shuttle sewing machine In tlu t 'lilted States licensed to use tile celebint.'d Wilson fei'd sold for less than (II), and uck nowledgcd by all loljethels'St family sew ing machine for light or heavy sewing, In the market. Outfit free. Address E. E. MIXER CO.. Gen. Agtu, jovstf Albany, uregon. ALBANY B00iuiTORE. Bitublished In ts.t. E. A. Frcvlaiid, "I KAI.ER IN EVERY VARIETY OF I ml-Hidlaiumis Issiks. siliisl bisiks blank hooks, stationery. Rooks Imiiorted to order ut short notice, Albany, Dec 8, W70. TURNING TLRX1X-U. I AM PREPARED TO DO ALL KINDS of turning; keep on band and make to order rnwhldc-hcltoined chairs, and spin ning wheels. Simp near the "Magnolia if iii." John m. metzler, AttnyJirov,l,,WiiW. Bt-SINKSS CARDS. JOHN CONNER, B A N KING I AX1) Exchange OSice, AJ.IIASV, OKMIOX. DEPOSITS RECEIVED SUBJECT TO check at slslit. Interest allowed ontliiicdcpositsiiicnln. Kxehang mi Portland, San Francisco, ami Nbw York, for sulc al lowest rates, i 'oiled ions niadSifad promptly ceiiiitt-il. Refers to il. U . l.'i'i'wtl, llvnrv Falling, W. S. l-mbtA llankinjf Ponr? from S A. M. lo 4 P. M. Albany, Feb. I, lgtt-M MAKBI.K WOllKS. 10.0 & KTAKUKSt, Dealer In Jloumueuis, Obelisks, Tombs, IIcikI iiud Foot Strni'., Exoellted in California, Vermont and Italian Marble. j SALEM, OREGON. IiRAM II MIOI AT ALBAS Y. i ' J. 1KW. CKASft BOW & CBAXE, Iiealcrs in I rotit, Shorx, and Findings AI.HANY, )!'.;, o, INVITK THE ATTESTHCJ OF THE public to their lull stock of the latest styles in gantlemen's and youth's lasus, I shoes, gaiters, Oxford tics, etc. etc., as w ell astothc very latest thing out in the Hue of ladies' and misses' gaiters, lialmorals, Newport ties. Antoinette buskins, and , many other new and fashionable styles, just received at theCiiv Boot Wore, whk'h . they will sell as rapidly as they can lind : puivlmscrs who w ish Brst-etos goods at tlie most reasonable rales. They respect ; fully invite yon to come and see their j stock. Hoot hoes, etc, made or repaired j to order, and H lof mirmnlttl. CITY BOijT STORE, FIRST STREET, rirat door Went of Meg later IIulM c J T y M A K K K T , rllsT street, ALBAJSY, OREGON, L. HARRIS, PROPRIETOR, ILL ENDEAVOR TO KEEP COX slant iy on hand a full supply of AIX KINDS OF .HEATS, Which w ill be of the very ls-st finality. The lilghest market price iiid for Issiyes, liogs and sheep. Third door west of Ferry, on south side of First street. J. L. HARRIS. Allianv, Dec. W, 1671-1.1V4 J. . MFKBEKUALE, Xotary Public, RKALEKTATF.& INNl'RANCf AOENT, ALBANY, OREGON. T F.NTSCOLLECTEO ANDTAXESPAID for non-renldenta and others, making out real estnte papers, etc OInec one door ; above telegraph offlcs-. SBvll I Albuny C'ollpgiiitr Inslilnte, ALBANY, OREUON. 'PHIS INSTITUTION WILL REOPEN ON X Monday, SeptemlK'i 4, 1(171, wlthaeorjia of teachers tumble and earnest. Instruc tion will lie thorough and practical, and the system of order unsarpusaed. Forii iicuiurantuireas R. K. WARREN. A. 51., President ; fir. Rev. E. R. GEARY. I. D.,Allnuiy. The Eyes! The Ears! BR. T. I,. UOLBEX, Oenllst mid Aiirist, Alonn)-, Oregon DR. GOLDEN IS A son of the noted old opthalmie dwtor, u, (ioiiten. Dr. Golden has had experience In treating the various tttamtlM to which the eye andenrare subject, and feels confident of giving entire sutlsiactlnn to ,thos who uiny place tlicinsi'lves under his are. iipni is, m. BR. E. O. SMITU, BEXTIST, HAS LOCATED IN AI I ian , ami Is now ready to wait on the rll incus ot Al bany and viclnitv.wllh a new Invention In dental work. It, consists In support ing the pin le to i he month without covering the whole roof, as neretotore. Those wishing artificial teeth ore reipiest ed to rail and examine for themselves. Also, plates mended, whether iartlnllv broken or divided. Tcoth.extmctod wltli out pain. Office over TurreU's store. All work waii-anted. 7v4 Pupi -liuuguiir, Culeemining, Beeoratlnf, &c. I.t M. WADSWORTII will give promi ; . attention to all orders for Paper hanging, Culceuilnlng, Deeoratlng, Ac, In this city or vicinity. All work executed In tlie latest style, In the liest manner, and at lowest living rates. 6s5"Orders left nt Furniture Warerooms of Clou. Mealey will receive prompt attention, i(i i J. A Xespner Advertlaeuicnt. Some years ago a Quaker knljrlit of i!s slicurs anil thimble, who exercised I lib avocntiou-iu Cauterbnry, was hn posed upon by tin atlrolt Rcotiudrd, ! who contrived to jret a suit of clothes i on credit, and attenvaitl! locsini)ed wiilaHtt pnylng furtuein. nteqttnker was tco K)r to lose the delit ; lint like too many others t his (. he Iwd appiireiilly iiooiImt awriftltlT. The ttecotpit wits plaeetl on his books and .soon forgotten. About live ycai-s iiflewtirtls he was examining his old records of debt Hlltl ftvdit. profit ntid loss, when his attention was attracted to this nccolint, HikI all tbe ciriiiinstaii cea attending mine fresh to his mind. Suddenly nil odd tiioitgllt snggested it self. "I'll try an Cxperiiucnt,'.' stiid Jiii to blinsfrT; "iXB"lutw I may nteccMi In catofrtlig tla? rogue and getting my pay."' lie immediately prcpftri'd tin tulrer- ti.-tuiiieut in snbstanee as follows, which he insertitl in tile Kent Humid : - If Mr. Henry febbsr, who was in L'anlerlsuy about the inoiith of AllgtWt, in the year 1183, will send his address to the editor of tbU paper, lie will hear of something to advantage." Having Instmcted the editor not to disclose nis name to t lie rogue if be should cult, but to retjuest the latter to leave bis tnldress, the Quaker patiently awaited the result of bis exs'iiuiciit. In short lime be was informed by a note from the editor tluit the individ ual alluded to in i lie advertisement, having arrived from London, might be found at the "Kose Hotel." The tailor lost no time in preparing a transcript of hU account, not lor getliug to cliarge inten'St from the time that tlie debt was incurred. Tak ing a bailiff with him, w ho bore a legal process suited to the occasion, he soon arrived lit the lodgings of the swindler. The bailiff was instructed to stand off nt a little distance till a signal should indicate the time for him to approach. The Quaker now entered the wffec roomiiud rang the bell ; and when tlie servant appeared, mincsted him to inform the gentleman oil whom be was in search, that ii friend Wished to see him. The .vaiter obeyed tlie sum mons, and soon both debtor and cred itor were lookiii": each other Ui the : lace. j "How dost thou do?" Kindly in quired the Quaker, in a bland tone. . " Perhaps thou tlost not know m V " I dou'l believe 1 have the pleasure , of your acquaintance," liolitely ans- i weretl our liero, with a lorwi smile. Host thou reruember purchasing a suit of clothes several year ago of a poor tailor in this city, and forgetting ! to pay for them :-" asked tlie Quaker. ! "Oh. no I" said Ibe gentleman, ; blushing slightly ; "you must be mis taken in the persotl, It cannot pos sibly l! me that you wished to find." flttt tlie Quaker was not be shaken oil' by this denial of bis identity. "All, John! I know thee well. Thou art the very 'man I wished to see. Thou hast at this moment the very coat tluit I made for thee. Thou must acknowledge it was of good stuff and well made, or, it could not have lasted thee so long.' "Ob, ye.-," said the gentleman, a)v petulug suddenly to recollect himself; "1 do remember now the circumstan ces to which you allude. Yes, yes I bad Intended to call and settle that 111 tie bill before leaving Canterbury, and you may deiiend on my doing so. 1 have come here to take possession of a large amount ol property which has fallen to me by will. See ! here is tlie advertisement w hich apprised me of my fortune." Here be liantled the Quaker a copy of the paper containing the advertise ment whose history we have given above. Tin.' Quaker looked at it with Imperturbable gravity and continued "Yes, I see thou art "in hick ; but as my demand is a very small one, 1 think 1 must insist on payment before thou contest in possession of thy large estates." A tap at Ibe window hero brought the bailiff into the presence of the parties. The swindler was mrtieu- larly astonished at the appearance of this lunctionary, w bo immediately be gan to execute "his part of the drama. "Vyhat!" exclaimed the rogue in an angry tone ; "you surely liavnt sued me ? ' Yes, I have " replied the Quaker ; "and thou should bo tlianktul that nothing worse has liapiened to tliee." "Come in then.'' said the debtor, finding himself fairly caught ; "coine ill and! will pay you if I must." The three w'eiit Into l lie hoti-o to gether, and the slipjiery gentleman having ascertained the annum! of the bill, paid it in full. The tailor having signed the receipt, placed it in the hands of ills late creditor, with feel ings sneh as may be readily imagined. The swindler took it, and for the first time glanced at the various items of which it was conqioscd. He said noth ing till lie came to the last charge, which was "tor advertising;" when he broke forth. Hallo ! what's this ? For AdvertlsinaS" That's an odd charge In a tailor's bill. You're cheating uie !" "Ob. no," coolly replied the Qua ker ; "that is all right. I have charg ed thee the cost of publishing the ad vertisement which thou just showed me." Here the swindler savagely de manded. Do you mean to sav that you caused the publication of that ad- veriisement? 7 " Trulv. I did." renll.il the Ouakcr. with most provoking coolness. O Yon t.il, I .. I....1 .... l I.. If --,. vv.v, UM9CI1WU 111 II.. quickly retorted the rogue. "Convince me of that." said tbo Imperturbable Quaker ; "and thou wilt find me ready to confess the fault." " You said in your advertisement tlmt I -bou M hear of something to my advantage, if I would come la-re." "Tbou art mistaken," immediately responded the Quaker : "I only proni- . ised tlmt thou shouldst liear of some thing to advantage, and Is it not to the . advantage of a poor tailor to eollei t ! an old debt " I "If I Catch you in the street." said the swindler, in the deeiest rage, "I'll give you sneh a thrashing as will not : leave tin breath hi yourbody ."' ' Nonsense j" siiitl the Quaker ; : "if thou really intend to do anything of that sort, we had lieiter step out in j Hit' baekyai-d, and finish tlie bustneM at once." ' - ;r . . The i-ogne was cnmpleh-lv aba-died , by ,the coolness of the (fiaker, ami i stood epepcti-ktfw, and almost pel ritied. " Now," said tile tailor, good na turedly, "lot nie give thee a piece of advice. AVhen next llmu hast aeea j sion to get a suit of elothes, tliou lmd better not attempt to cbeet the oor tailor, bnt pay him honestly ; tor then thy conscience will not disturb thee, ami thy sleep will lie sweet and re freshing. Farewell ."' There is no doubt of the literal truth of this story, as the writer received it some time since from the lips of tlie Quaker himself. Nol Appreciated. A young gentleman anxious to learn to shig. went up into the garret one Sunday night almut bed time, and res olutely commenced bis exercises with his psalm-honk, lie bail been singing hut a short time, wlieu bis ffttlier, a fidget r old gentleman, stole out of lied with ids night cap on, reaching the foot of the stairs mildly inquired : "James?" Xo answer came. .lames was very busy with his musical exercises, ".lames?" Still no answer. "James?" ".Sir?" "Have you heard a peculiar noise?" "Xo." "an I thought but never mind." And the old gentleman walked back to his i-ooni muttering indistinctly. Presently James resumed bis exer cises, and was getting on famously, as be thought, wlieu Ids parent, like' tlie ghost of Hamlet's father, again came iortn exciaimmg : "James ?" "Sir." "Are you sure tliat Bose is fastened up?" "Yes. sir, 1 attended to it myself." "Very well, very well : no "matter AmMie once more returned to his room. Wondering what his father meant by inquiring after the house-dog Hose, James was silent tor a minute, but soon returned to bis exercises more vigorously than ever. Again, however, he was Interrupted by the voice of his parent shouting : "James?" "Sir." "1 am sure 15ose is loose." "It ain't be possible, sir." "He Is. I tell yoiv" "What makes vou think so, sir." Why, for the last half hour I liave heard something tlmt Bounded very much as if tlie dog was worrying the poor old eat-" James never ro-unicd bis exercises al ter that overwhelming compliment. Ex. Webster ami Branch. While John Hmnch. of Xortb Carolina, was General Jackson's Secretary of the Xa vy. lie, Tazewell, and Daniel Webster were walking on the north bank of tlie Potomac, nt Washington. Tazewell, willing to amuse himself at Branch's simplicity, said. "Branch, I'll liet yon a ten-doHar hat that I can prove tlmt von are on the other side of the river." " Hone," said Brunch. " Well, " said Tazewell, pointing to tlie oppo site shore, "isn't that one side of tlie river?'.' "Yes." "Well, Isn't this tlie other side?" "Yes." "Then as you are here, are you not on the otla;r side?" "Why, I declare." said poor Branch, "so it is! but Iiere comes Webster. I'll win back my hat from him." Webster now came up, and Branch accosted him : -Webster, I 'II bet yon a ten-dollar hat that 1 can prove that vou are on tlie other side of the river."" "Done." "Well, isn't this one side?" "Yes." "Well, isn't that the other?" "Yes, but I am not on that side." Branch hung his liead and submitted to tlie loss of the two hats as quietly as he could. A Hindoo priest called in all tlie mcmlicrs of n larsrc faniilv, one of whom was known to have committed a thetl. and thus addressed them: "Take each of you one of tliese sticks, which are of an equal length, and put them under your pillows to-night. I do not. at present know the offender, but vou must return the sticks to me to-morrow morning; and the one be- lomr hist lo the thlel Will nave grown an Inch during the night." , Tlie fam ily retired to rest ; but before lie went to sleep, the man who had committed the theft, thinking to out-wit the priest, cunnuigly cut off an Inch from his stick, firmly believing, by this means, to attain the length of the others by next morning. The sticks were re turned, and, by comparing tlieni, the priest was instantly able to pitch upon tlie oft'eudcr, to his great surprise and dismay. ' Here, boys, I have 3 apples ; so there are. two for you 2, and two for me too. The ..kcl. ion Dor la r. A few days ago a rather amusing scene took plate in one of onr well known drug stores. A small lory en tered to purchase a bottle of "blo,x! searcher, when lie was asked by one oftbc clerks in attendance to walk back into tlai doctors's office, and lie would sliow him something. The lioy went kick, and was direct ed to look at a particular closet. So soon as bis eyes were fixed on the same, tlie clerk pulled aside the screen, and Is-hold! a skeleton or huge proportion presented Itself to the atontlied vision of the lioy. who, not waiting to ak any questions, turned and ran for the door for dear life. In this way lie happened to run against the doctor on the pavement, who wits coming in to attend bis office, hour. The doctor not knowing wliat was wrong witli the bov. tHinklrw perhaps be was ft patient, inquired of Ibe clerk, who at once fold him of the joke ; at the recital of which the doc tor, who is a kind, good-natured man, grew quite indignant, and desired the young man to go at once ami bring the lad back, so that the whole matter might be explained. Tlie young man went as desired, and found the oor little fellow on the op jiosite side of the street gazing across at tin drug store, nearly frightened to death, lie was entreated to come hick, bnt be would not. Hearing this, tlie doctor who, by the way, is a very thin man. and resembles a living skel etonsaid lie would go and bring tlie poor Utile fellow himself ; and with that intention lie went out on tlie pavement, waving bis band saying : "Come over here, sonny ;' nobody will hurt yon," The lad. almost afraid to stir, hal lowed liack : " Xo you don't ; you can't fool me, though you have got your elothes ou. You think I don't know you !" Kuiotlierlnjr Fire. Kxthiction of fire by sinotliering Is a method which deserves notice. When a lady' dress catches fire her usual course is to rush out of tlie mora screaming r help, thereby causing the flames to spread over" her with great fury. In sneh eases "Iielp" is at hand in the shape of the table-cloth or the hearth-rug. If she were promptly to envelope herself In one or tlie other or if some one were to do It for her the tire would at once go out for want of air. Again, if window-curtains catch fire, a common tendency for mankind is to nwh out shouting "Fire!" and "Iielp!" Reader why not help yourself especially If you lie a man by finding out lieforelmnd what is the best course of procedure in tlie circumstances? You ought at once to tear tlie. curtains down, and throw the rug or table-cloth over them. If you cannot do this, and must leave the room, don't open the window and by all means remember to shut the door af ter you: and thus, by mitHllff of the sup ply of nlr, at nil events delay the con flagration as long as jmssihle. It is a matter of the greatest importance that a man should have a delinite idea of what he will do. or atlcinjit, in case of tire. Opinions may diner as to the best mode of action, but all ought to Is- agreed in having some mode of ac tion to carry out. Nothing is more pitiful than to see any one rushing wlldlv almut shouting "Help!" mid i wasting energy. For a man to be seen in such circumstances Is contempt ible. Home In Northern India. Xo bouse Is ever built of wood here, for two or three weighty rea sons. First. It would lie too hot ; : then, if we built of wood, the white j aunts wonkl In a few years eat up (be timbers, and the house would fill aliout our head-; and besides, in any ease, wood snirmic tor nuiunng is very scarce (and dear. So tla house Is built of what are called "kntcha" bricks. These are simply square-cakes of a tenacious clay, kneaded with water and dried in tlie sun. Tliey are cemented together in building with mini; and in Knropenn bouses tlie whole is surrounded by an outer layer of kiln-dried bricks, to protect the mud walls from washing by tlie rain, Over this again, that no moisture may penetrate the walls. Is spread a thin coat of mortar ; and then tlie build ing is whitewashed, and it is finished. On account of tlie white ants, there is no wood In the building wliero it can possibly be dispensed with ; tlie floors are .of brick and mortar, only the doors and tlie beams over bead are of wood. Houses in Northern India have usually only one story : bnt tlmt story is aliout twenty feet high, that the heated roof may In summer lie as far from our beads as possible. So, for the sake of coolness and ventila tion, the rooms are large and airy . Accident has had considerable to do with tlie most important scientific dis coveries. A gentleman ill Bingham, Utah, who is sinking a shaft with the expectation of finding gold hi a can yon, some time ago nailed a piece of sheet iron up, to keep tlie water from dripping on tlie men at work. After it hail thus served to keep off the wa ter for some three weeks, be took it dowu and found, to ids astonishment, that it was coAercd more tlmn an Inch thick with gold, silver anil copper, with a little iron, which had been in the water in solution, and locame pre cipitated by being brought hi contact with tlie sheet Iron. The silver was over 43UO to the ton, and tlie gold over $800, beekles tbo copper.. M olds of Poulrs. The following funny puzzles Hi spell ing and prou uncial ion may aiutise) some during tlie winter evenings. Tliere is a word of five letters, and if you takeaway twooftbem. ten will remain. What is tlie wont ? Often. If you take away o f, ten will remain." Tliere i a word of five letters. ftHi if vim take away-two of tbem, six will remaiii. What Is it? Sixty. Take away ty, and six re mains. Here is a ptule. Take away my first letter, take away my seetrnd letter, take away all my letters, and I am always tla! same, Can you guess it? ' You are right ; it Is the mail car rier. There is one word, which if you change the place of one of tlie h'lters, means exactly npiioske from what It did at first. What is the word ? It Is united. Place tlie i after the t, and It becomes untied. Can you tell me wliat letter it is that has never been used only twice in America? It is a; it is used only twice in America. Can you tell me when there were only two vowels y It was in the days of Noah, before you and I were born in the days of no a before u and i were liorn. Qttl yroi tell me when it is that a blacksmith raises a row in tlie nhpha bct? It Is when he makes a poke r ami shove 1 (a poker and shovel.) 1 suppose you know how to spell heiress? Perhaps yon ism tell me why a bare is easier to catch than an heiress? It is because au heiress has nn I and a hare has none. Xow let me hear whether you can spell the fate of all earthly things In two letters? I Will tell you si k (decay.) I suppose yon have often heard, or can guess bow to siiell mouse-trap in three letters ? Your are right it is c a t. Can you tell a man in one word that he look a late breakfast? This is the way attenuate (at ten you ate.) Can you tell me wliat word is al vavs pronounced faster by adding two letters? t It is the word fast; add erto it, and it Is faster ? What Is tte wonl of one sylablo which, if you take away two ietters from it, will become two" sj'lables? You must try and guess tiiat, for it is my hist puzzle. It is plague ; take away pi, and it becomes ague. Klru Without Money. Many a man is rich without money. Thousands of men with nothing in their pocket, and thousands without even a pocket, are rich. A own born with a good sound constitution, a good stomach, a good heart, and good bulbs, and 11 pretty good bead-piece, is rich. Oood bones are better than gold; tough muscles than silver ; and nerves that dash fire and carry energy to ev ery function are better than houses and laud. It is better than a landed es tate to have the right kind of Cither and mother. Oood breeds anil bad breeds, exist among men as really as among herds and horses. Education may do much to check evil tendencies or to develop good ones ; but it is a great thing to inherit the right pro portion of (acuities to start With. The man is rich who has a good disposi tion who is naturally kind, patient, cheerful, hopefht, and" who lias a Ila voiof wi: and fun in his composition. The liardest thing to get along with in (his life, is a man's own self. A cross, selfish fellow a desponding and complaining fellow a timid and earc burdened man these are all born de formed on the inside. Their feet do not limp, but their thoughts do. The Hits of Life. Get out of them, says Hall's .owmtZ 0 nnh if you wish to live long, if you wish to avoid tla- lunatic asylum, if you wish to escape suicide or a miser's death. Men and women must have amuse ment, must have diversion. It is wholesome for the mind to break away from its daily vocation or employment every night. Get out of the ruts, all ofyou:paya neighborly visit throe nights in 11 week ; or for two after noons let tliere be a "let up" in the way of a drive to the Central Park, a visit to the "village," an excursion on tlie river, or in the ears, a pie-hie, a Celebration, but liest of all, in city or country, a horseback ride of an "hour or two, "there and back;" what an appetite it gives ; after the weariness, what a delicious sleep follows! Get out of the rut, two or three hours a week, and there will be no time lo-tiii the long run : for it gives activity b tlie moral nature; it cultivates the in fectious ; it wakes up observations; it exercises comparisons ; it gives breadth ot view on all subjects! It makes a man more manly ; it makes a woman mom womanly: and in countless cases it would save from the mad-housc .' Dr. BtsiiBV. King Charles If. pay--ed a visit to Dr. busliby : the doctor is said to have strutted through the room Willi his bat cmi, while Iih mnjftstv walked complacently behind him. Willi, his lut under hi- arm. But when ho was taking leave at the door, the dnc thus addressed the King: ! hope your majesty will excuse my want of respect hitherto ; nut, u my boys were to Imagine tliere was a greater man in tlieklngilom than myself, I should ncv r. bu able to rule them."