VOL. IV, AL.'iANV, ORKGON, JAN aA it y 6, 1872. NO. 18. I'l IU.lS.Umi KVI KV SAT I IllMY. By 'HU YAM CXEVK, IK KEC-ISTril EUII,SirGS, Curnr JBrnr 'in I WnS 8 rW. ti:rms- -in rne year Rix month "inlc coiiica ADVASfJBi . .Ten cent. LATER. APVEItiislXti Transient t'lver: Isemcn Tn line; or le-s, itisj it; satise anoni Insertion l. ttsemcnt ins, net) . . ! square or rtimi Hi Oicb Largtir a 1 ' ' most liberal V-TIll. Jul! VtVIilt. Having wice1vci new tv-rie.stoi of on ond Inks, nurd; a (.orlon lu'i'ahyote., wo ore prepare! tocjiMf .!.! kind of print Vie in :t better manner, a i l lifly percent cluitiKT ilutii over buioro Ottered in this city. Agents Gu Utt lit sisler. The following ,i!"!i ore autliorlaei to raoolvo iui i recuirit tor sn'tsenptioas, iron i'in-j, .. ! rthc Ki 'tt.-.Tldt: Jlirt-tii S'ni.h, (Inn 'sbufjr. 0. I. Touipkin Uariisburj, I'eter llnmo, i: uwiisrtllo. V. ft. Kirk. Iliwiisvlllo, V.. E. Wiieriei-. s-.io. T. K. Ko.viioi is.Sti 'in. 1.. I. Fisher, San Fmnolsen, IX P. Porter. She ! r- s iifion. .'etcher Wells, SiioOu VI cte. Polk To JUS! i D. B. R2CE, 5L ., PIiy'Mlclmi mid on '.;!.:iy. Or. OFFICE ON TliE SOUTH SIDE Or MAIN : uvw. April, iswb N. 6. Dli Ziitl HAS ON nSD AM) CONSTANTLY i revolviittt ; largo stock of Uroeorl. i Wood nnd wlilr confoetlonerj', V v. haleato uinj n iSoir.M druij utore. d :': oil. iocs, rare, toiauvo, cigars. I o IS. ' ;on. Ili.i 1.1 j. ii. MmiiEti.. Atiurnrj.i Olid OOUCITOKSIN !'.: toM l:i ti'luiitiiily. uoHt otlleo. i'votii tn i IVI J. N, II. I.! 11. L'EKV AN 1 1 Pilot -' lice ovi r tlit old Poi'flandt t hvo!i. 1. 0, llAVtLl.. I.. il.IN.N. powell it rnax, Attoruiyx nml rwomtcioni at 3-. A N'l) SOUClTOliW IN t'lIANUKBi J.. 7 A r Imim notary ; tt iil . Aiob Coltectii tisttud lonveumoea j Ion led ;o. . Oiv upti . II. CBAttOB. ii. humphiu v. Notary rulille, CKAJVOQ & I2i:-:pjii:v, Attoruoya mid '(j!iiisrllor n( Itw, ALBAS V. OEKOON. OfliiO i:i I'l , ni) slntr C'. 1 'riiAurATi: op cr. Co milker Si'c rttl y wantl Itn VJieitit V t(!t. dlflo, doo ALL JXs-J work m ummiihm)! lu proletwion i:i 'lie beat ami iuo.h tipproveti luotlioU, un-1 m ri'iWHmMe nitc us win Ik; had elw?ir!n?ro. NUrniMOxhtea'iin'.iiWtcml lor tin )Ht extraction of rwth If dostrcJ. Offlcfi in Ptirrisli hrik Mloiiki up Biaiis. Kostdciico llrat liou.-M-soniiioH oiifivutiomvlclr'irtli, fronting on court liouiw blotk. J7--I8 nOKECPATHIO PHYSX-IiiW. OmCK ON rnt8T STRKKT, ONE door wi'-ii of iton latijln, in lttliKhftrti two ntpry bribtt up stairs), Over (Job, TniwllM Btore. KKdtDKxeiv Corner Hixtii Fr ry gtveeto, Al'JUHy, Oregon. - "lSiTSao t 2i e k i", Ecftiora in WATCUES, .,( , Si tit Iry, Ctr, li!nirni of clocks, valche jowulrj'. oiled. etc, attended to. Ail wor win 3lv3 LEFFCL t'fc 2HYL2!S' WatorWli-o 0I33 81'IIERICAL FLUMES, And Uenernl .lllll Mm Ulnory. J. F. BACKENSTO, Igont, eivj Albany, Oregon. 20 DOLLARS A DAY TO MALE AN1 FEMALE AOENTB, To Introduce the celebrated $23.00 ISuekeTtt ScwSiiff Mncalnc. ti-riTi i: y.r.'iK tN lariii sun s, and nthe shuttle suwtntt a.achin'-iu the 1 P.c 1 .Motcsll. eliseiuo iiiceeioiii Wi'xon feed sold for less til l" . and .nu'loihrod llv 11!! i'l lie the 'est lal'iliy sew Inn maoldno. fori! ilitorh nivyBttvlnt . in the market. Otltfltroe. Vddivts MLNEU & PEAKSOS. Qp. Aifts.. tovaif Albany, Oregon ALBANY BOOU HTOUK. Kstnlilislird In 1WW. EL A. E'reolaiHl, 1 w. J f mlsvaUanentM Iskik blank Imoks, sttttlonory. tool lor nt liorl tiollto. Albany, Pee. 3. lsi'il. . sehisil books, U00U Imported SSl'ii SRs. HWJ7 v, t. - s 8 '. x T AM PREPARED TO DO ALL KIN DR 1 of tuniliw; keepoa band and make o SfS , s si o . new the Magnolia ning wheels. 8bo lJ"Kiyai. M1' ?' v. a iSii . I , i. iX ., (IN- r JOHN CONNER, BA N KING AKI chaaffi Office ALBANY, OHliJOS. DEPOSITS RECEIVER hFBJECT TO hooks? .i;h:. tn'oresi (dhiivUid(BBlfWl si: In yln. 'xrliSrrSi" on rot-Bati-l, Smi Francisco, ami Nuft Vuck, for nahj ttt lowe-t .-.i t'ollftrtlonn made and prow-it ly remit "ed. Ei n-.-i io il. W, CorbotL Hour. Fai'lto, V. . s. Uuld. Honking hours from 8 A. M. to 4 P. II. Ailinny, Fell. 1, 1871-2JV3 MAKBLR WOKKS. Dealers in Moauuicn, Obelisks, Tombs, !c:id and Foot eitoncs, Executed In (.'alifontlai VVrniont Mai bie. auit Italian EALKM, OHEGOll, i:CA-J SHOP AT ALBANY. j . ; w. M. 11. CHANT.. CRANK, now & Iioak IIooli', PlOJMl, lltld FUlUiHgs ALBANY, OltEKOS, jNVIXE Till) ATTENTIOS OF THE 1. liu'i.ie to I Iv.'ir mil s.ori. of fbe ln.es;. . stylo in (tentlcuicnS an 1 yputliS boots, luiocs, Roltofiii' Oxford 1i(N, o;o.,oto., aswoil at to ilo very latest iliiiiK out in Hie lino of todies' and misvs- garters, IxUwom'.s, Ncwvort lies, Antoinette Iniskltis, mid many ottmc Mow and (atluoljttble styles, just waeivedat the City Bout S.otw, which they will sell as raiddiy Kte thuy can titut iim'chnsera who wish BtsKllws itnods tit the mot reasonable into.. Tltey resjiert fttlly invito you to eotne tt'id set) iliolr ttoik, IUki:, s'.ioos.ci.'.. nit'.ioor lvjiaiml to order, and tmr ttwratttjd. ( li'V BOOT STORE, EWST STI.'EKT, I'lrdt door West cf Ke)rUe IluiltPK 47vJ CITY MAUKKT, PBST STHLET, ALIIASY, t!IX;tN, J. L. HARRIS, PROPRIETOR, WILL ENDEAVOR To SEEP .'ON I ? stanliy on hand it full supply of AI.3. IiINftS iiV tirATSi, Wllleh will lie of the very best quality. The hi In -it market price ii 1 for beeves, hoar an-1 shoo',. Third door west of Ferrv. on south lde of First sin ot. J. L. HARRIS, Albany, Boo, '', 1371-Uvt 1 . c. nr. m:H4LL, Kottiry PobJio, BE.II. ESTATK A IN,M IIASCEAE?ST, ALBANY, OHKliON, , REN TS a iLLECTEB'AJfl TA X ES PAID lor non-residents and others, making our real estate timers, etc. Oilleeone door almve telegraph oftleo. S-'tva tlbany Collegiate IntitiiH', ALBANY, OREGON. rpiUS 1NST1TI TION WILL REOPEN ON J. Moinlav. ss'ittomlior 4, 1S7I, wltliiicoros of teachers capable mid earnest. Instrur- ! 110:1 w in no iiiurouaii alio iinu-ui-in, au i the svstom of order unsiu-.iii.ssod. Foriwr- i .t " . 1 . - I tieuwrsouurvsH I!. K. WARREN. A. M., Pivsi.lent : Or, ltev. K. It. tiEARV, D, l).,Al!niny. The Lyes! The Lara I 1K. T. L. OOLDGN, Oculist and Anrlsl. Albnn.v Orrirou. DIt. ("OLDEN IS A sou of the noted I ..!.( ,l i,.,lil.. itiM.lfti'. 8. C. (widen. ti I Dr. tlfdden has btot I axperienee Itltreatlaif tlio various disease 10 1 which thooyoanilearares'ibjert.an 1 feel ooMll lciit of gmim entire atttlsfnetlon lo thorn who may place themselves under his ; care, April is, en. j bit. E. oTsMITIJ, DENTIST, HAS LOCATED IN AI Imnv. and is now ready j to wait on the citizens of Ah hnnvaml vleinltv.wil h a new i Invention ill denial work. It consists In support lin; 1 he plate to the month without covering the whole roof, as horo'olore. Those wishing nrltlleial tooth are request 1 to call and examine for themselves, lso, plates mended, whether imrtinlly broken ordividel. Teeth.exlmeled will: out pain. Oulce over TurrcU's "lore. All work warranted. 7r4 Puper-banlu;, Cnlscuiluius, Docoratiug, &c. 17 H. WADSWOUTtI will Rlvs prompt ' . attention to all ordwr for Piper han'thiK, toluemhiing, Heooratlni;, Ac., In this city or vlclnltv. All work executed at lowest living rates. C-Orders left t 1 Furniture Waivnaims of Chan. Ueoley wUI 1 receive prompt atlcutlon. Wvl 1 In Ilie latest style, 111 me nesi uiKiiuer, aim ii I EUttOK. ; Mr. Solomon Wluthrop was a plain old farmer an niHtrr, preebe man i who did even-thing by e-d-ibiisSicd rule?, and eotild sec no rv:t,on w hy I people should grp at aiiythlng he- 1 yood what had been reaeued by their (freat-graiidtailier. Ho ld three dill- jdren, twoboysandagirl. There was 4mnmlalii aoveiiteen yean old ; Bam j uel fifteen; lamiv fourteen. It wits a cold winter's day. Samnel was in the kitchen, reading book. i and so interested win he that he did ' not notice llw entrance of bis father. Jerry was hi the opposite corner, en gag, din ciphering out a stun which he had found In bis arithmetic. "Sam.'" said Ids falht r. "have you ' worked tint sum out yet?" "No. father,'' an swt rctl the boy hes- : itathigly. i -lii.lo't I tel! you to Mick to your arlrhmetletl! you had ilorie it:-" s.-iid ' Mr. W futTiSm in a severe tone. Samuel hllnff dow n Lis bend and lookvd tmuhletl. "ithv b.iven t vou done it' eon tinned the Either. "I can't do it, fuher," tremblingly said Samuel. "Can't do It! And why not? Look at Jerry, there, wiih hi; slatettiid ien-cil-3 lie had ciphered further than you have long before he was as old as yttu are." "lorry was always fond of sums and problems, father. They have no iuter ( -t at all fit me." "i'hat's because you don't try to feel an Interest In yourittudies, What book is that you are rending?" "it's a work on philosophy, lather." "A work on fiddlestick ' Oo put it away this instant, and then get your slate ; and hi t you Id me see yoil awnv from your arill.uietic imtii yoi: can work out tiio.-e roots;-' Do you un derstand "' Same, 1 made 10 answer, but silently be put away hi ; be got his siatt; chimney coi n. r. ihilosophy ; and then and Sttt down In the ills Hp trembled and his eyes nidi der.ed. for be unhappy. His duller had was very been harsh toward 4 him. and he felt that it was without a cause. "Sam," Siihl Jerry, as ?oo:i as tbelr fatlicr luul gone out ol the room, "I'll do that (-tun lor you." "No, Jerry,"" replied the younger brother, witii a grateful look; "that will be deceiving father. I'd tW to do the simi, but! fear that 1 shall not succeetl. Samuel worked very lianl, but to no purpose. His mind was not on the subject before him. The roots and s maivs, the bases and iierpeudlemara, haieseeii Mr. Young, and he is will thotigh coiuiwrattvely simple in them- jg t0 ko you as an apprentice, selves, were to him a ma cl hicoin- ! ,),.m- Bn(j twi g0t 0 tie fa,-,,), prehenslbte Inlhgn! and the more be : B,1( i think the l ed' thitis; yon cob do lii. d. the more be became perplexed jsto learn the blacksmith's trade. I aud both. ted. liwvcglven up all hope of ever mak '1 he truth was his father did not iui-1 ing a surveyor out of you. anil if you derstaud him, I hail a farm voti would not know how Samuel was a bright boy, and tin- j to measure it or lay it out. Jerry will commonly intelligent for one of his ! soon be able to take my place as sur- nge. Mr. tvintlirop was ti uiorougn in itbematieian ; he baldly ever came across a problem he could not solve, and he desired that his boy should be like him ; lie considered that the acme of educational perfection lay in the power of conquering Euclid; and he often expressed the opinion that, were l.iielul living then, lie could "give the o il o'eomet rieia n ti hard tu -ic. i II scemetl not to lUKler-tai.il that 1 w .... dillereut minds were made with differ ent capacities, ami what one mind grasped with case another of equal power would fail to comprehend. Hence, because Jerry progressecl rap idly with Ins mathematical studies, and could already survey a piece ot 1 land of many tingles, he Imagined that as Samtutl made no progress in the same branch, he was idle and careless, j mill so treated him accordingly. He never va mildly conversed with hi3 younger sou, with a view to ascertain I he true bent of his mind ; but he had ; his own standard of the power of all minds, and he pertinaciously adhered 1 to it. ""1 There was another thing that Mr. j Wlnthrop could not see, and that was j that Samuel was continually pondering upon such profitable matter as was in- j teresthtB to him, and that he was ! , " , ,, . ,..i... ; nlj everiuio) nor (lid 111- i.uiiei , f-A.i , , . ' 1 . . 1 I . 1 - !l li 111! I..J l.i., I . , 1 t , . see, cither, that 11 he wished Ins boy to become a mathematician, he was pur suing the very course to prevent such a result. Instead of endeavoring to make the study interesting to the child he was making it OlNjAXiODj. ""'l'lio dinner hour came, and Samuel had not worked out the sum. lis RltttcT was angry, and obliged the boy go without hi, dinner, at the same time telling him that be was an idle, lay lad. Poor Samuel left tiio kitchen for his own room, and there he sat. and cried. At length his mind seemed to pas from the wrnmr he had suffered at the hand of his father, and his face light-j ened up. There wa.-t .1 lire in the room ; below his chamber, so he was not very cold; and getting up, he went to closet and from under a lot of oltl clothes he took forth some long strips 1 ot wood, lie was evidently lasmonuig some curious affair from tliac pieces of wood, lie had bits of wire, little scraps of tbi plate, pieces of twine and dozens of small wheels that lie had made himself, and he seemed to lie working to get the whole together after some particular foslliou of his own. Half the afternoon had thus passed away when his si ,ter entered his cham ber, she bad her apron gathered up in tier baud, and after clo-mg the door softly behind lier she approached the spot where her brother sat. "Here, Sammy, see, I liave brought you something to eat. I know you ' ... , i,UI,rv f """STf V As she Spoke sh she opened her apron and took out four cake, ti iiiectt of pie and soote tbeese. 'l ite liov was hungry, ami Iwaftated not tonvnll hiin sclfof his ister kintl oSVr. HeUwtd Iter as lie took the takes, and thanked lur. -Oh, tvlstt prettr thinjr l that yon nre niaklnt:-'" said Fiiiinic, n flic Dtacd iixni her I'rother's labor. Won'Mrou klve it to me when it Is doner'' J "Sot tMsM&sgter," returned the hoy, with a unffo ; "11111 I will make yon lint e t!flly ai pretty." "Fsutnie (hiinketi her limther, and soon after It ft the room, while the hoy went oil will his work. Before low the variotH materitils that had beef ftihject tnSainncl'sliiiito anil iiticer yere joined and grooved to;." ii i r i'l ajonribtis ninniior. 'l'lio eitihnii plii!o-oitier set tiio ma- chkse lor it ltwikcd like ti inachiuf : nptm tite i fwor, then gaxed upon itin , teiiti'y. Ut eye gleam! witha pecul iar glow of satisfaction; la, Jpoked 1 1 proud and happr. t bile he stood and ! cazed upon Hie ii:d of billabon, the - door Opeut d and i ; father entered. WW are Ipu not sluilviiig?" exclaimed Mr. Winln-np, nsheiioiieed the boy staiiilii in the middle of the I tloor. Samuel treml!1 wen he ueanlhU filliLT- voice, and tiV-ncd pale with : four. "Ha! whatUthN?" nl.l his father, j as he caught sight of Ho enrioiK cou strnvtioh on the ftodri This is the secret of your IdleneM. Now I fee how it It you a:: not maler vour stu- dies. Yon spend yonrtiunin making j them lly-cagns. Til see wlaMier you'll learn to attend to your lemik or" not. riierel" As tlto father nfterr-d tlioin liirjli , ! otariilntlons. lie nut his foot iei,. tl.o : ,w 0f 1,1 dlsnleosiunt. 'IT,, iwiv i i uttered :t ttiiek cry, ai:d ftpmi for- I ! wtml, hut ton late. The eurlow con-' struct Ion was crushed to atomsthe j laborol'loiig weela. Looking at tho ntlUs of ruins and then covering Ilia ; lace Willi las UaiKtS, re UUTst mto 1 tears. "Ain't you ashamed ?" said Mr. ; Wltittifop j "a great hoy Hie you to spend your time in making clap n aps, and liicii cry about it because 1 elioosc you should attelal your stutlies. Now go to the barn and help Jerry to sb .il corn.'' The hoy was too foil of grief to make any explanation, ami without any word he left his chamber. But for long, long days afterwards he was weary and down-hearted. "Samuel." aid Mr. Wlntlirop, one dayafier the .-initio had opened, "I veyor. and 1 have already maue arrangements for having him sworn and obtalu his commLtslon. But your trade is a go! one, however, aud 1 have no don! t you will be able to make a good living at it." Mr. Y'oung was a Wacjcanith in a neighboring town anil he carried 011 quite an extensive business. , More 1....1 .1... over, ne 11.111 101; rcuutuuvn ' 1 ' taiion 01 is iiitc .. ,.., ..,,, s.-,oinol was deiioiited with his taibcr's proposal, and when be learned that Mr. Young carried 011 j quite a large machine shop, he was in j ecstacies. "His trunk was puked a good supply of clothes having been i provided, and, after kissing his mother i and sfater, and shaking bauds with his , Cither and brother, mounted the stage ; and set off for his new destination. 1 He found Mr. Young all he could j wish, and went into his limitless with 1 an assiduity that surprised his master. 1 One evening alter Samuel Wmthrep had beeu with his new master six months, the hitter came into the shop Mtcrall the journeymen liad quit work alnl gone home, and found the youth ISisily engaged in litiing a piece of iton. There were quite a number of ; pieces Oil the Stench at his side and ; some were curiously riveted together! and fixed with springs and slides, while - i 1- --- . thers apiK'ai-cd not yet ready lor t. ten- - 11 mm .... . . I destined use. Mr. ioung ascertained what the voting workman was up to, and be not only encouraged him in his undertaking, but he stood for hall' an hour anil watched him at his work. Next day Samuel Winthrop was re moved from the blacksmith shop to the machine shop. Samuel cften visited ids parent. At the end of two years his father was not a little surprised when Mr. Young informed liinrthat Samuel was the iiio.-t useful hand in his employ. Time flew fust. Samuel was twenty one. Jeremiah had been free almost two years, and was one of the most accurate and trustworthy surveyors in the country. Mr. Winthrop looked upon lifa eldest sou with pride and often expressed a wisli that hi oilier son should liave been like him. Samuel liad come homo to visit Ids parents, and Mr. Young had come w ith him. ' Mr. Young," said Mr. Winthrop, after the tea things bad been cleared away, "tliat fa a Sue factory they liave just creeled in your town." " YeW returned Mr. Young, "there are three of them, ami they are doing a very heavy business." I understand they have an exten sive machine shop connected with the fact oi ic 4. Now, if my boy Sam is a good workman, as you say lie is. per haps he might get a first rate situation there." Mr. Young looked at Samuel and smiled. " By the way," continued the old firmer, "what is all the noise I see and bear In the papers about those patent V hit hrop looms ? They tell me they go nheau of anything that was ever got up before." " You must ask your son about that," said Mr. Young. "That fa some of Samuel's business." " EhMVhat! some of Stun .' The old man st6pied short and gawd on his son. ttt was bewildered. It could not Ik that Id son his idle son was the inventor of the great power loom that had taken all the manufacturers by surprise. " What do you meau?'v be at length iuiiulrt il. "It is simply this, father, that the loom is inhi- , " retuniKl Samwl w ith conscious pride. " I have Invented It and taken a putettt right, and I luivo already la:en offered ton thousand dol lars for the patent right in two ad joining States. Don't you ivmcinber the ciap-trap you crushed with your foot six years ago-'" " Yes. replied the old man, whose eyes ware bent to the tloor, and over w hose mind a new light seemed beam ing Well," continued Samuel, that WAS almost a iinftcrn, thousrh of course I have made alterations aud improvements, and there fa room for more." "And that was what you were studying when you used to statu aud see me weave, and then fumble about my loom so much;" said Mrs. Mu throp. You are right, mother. Even then I laid conceived the Idea which 1 have since carried out." "And that fa why you could not understand my mathematical prob lem," uttered Mr. Wlnthrop, as he started from his chair and look the youth by the hand. "Samuel, my son, forgive me lor the hardness 1 have used towards you. I have been blind ed, but now see how i have iiil-u,iiicr-stood you. While I have thought you heedless and careless, you were solv ing a philosophical problem 1 could never liave comprehended. Forgive me, Samuel I meant well enough, hut lacked judgment and discrimina tion." Of course the old man had long !x fore beeu forgiven lbr his harshness, ami his mind was opened to a new lesion In human nature, it wasflinp ly this : Different minds have differ ent capacities, aud no mind can be driven to love that for Which it has no taste. First, seek to undersbuid the natural abilities and disposition of children, and then in your manage ment of their education "lor alter life govern yourself accordingly, George Combe, the greatest, mora, philosopher ol hi' day, could hardly reekoti in simple addition, and t o', am, the mathematician, could not w rite out a commonplace address. C'ALIFOliNl l El.OQUENCt. FolIOW- I112 fa the oneiiiii!r spasm of the ora tion given tit the Mechanics' ravill- ion, July 4th : "fftttow Citizens untl Ain'rict'n Hayles When Fite lom from her mountain luglit uniurleu the Mmj fioinr. the despotism of tottering Eu rope hid their diminished heads under a bushel of chaff. Then the I -right arch of Liberty spanned the wonder ing nations with civil and religious toleration, and the ralidium it our proud nationality spread her wings in a blaze ol tree Itepuolican nistiititions. Tla-re never was no. fellow citizens, there never will be-I say It without the fear of sucoessfu contradiction and unabashed before the despotism of effete Europe tla re never will be, fellow citizens never f swear it, nev er ! Let us, oh ! patriotic eagles soar aloft into the blue empyrean of uni versal emancipation, and swear we will never sliealli lb.-swoitl until the blessings of civil and religions lilierty shall fellow citizens shall yes, jhall totter to their fall. And that is what is the matter w ith Hannah, fellow cit-izeug- tliat is what is the matter with Hannah!" At this unexpected hurst of hi own elo jut ucc. Judge Sawyer's emotion mastered bun, and he stood 1 ightly upon his heath The stars 011 a neighboring banner winked mysteri ously, the stripes curled Into a dis traciiug snarl, anil, a wooden eagle in tlie audience snapped bis beak solemn ly, aud laid a candy egg. Some brass instruments belonging to a baud, stretched out straight ami yawned hideously. Our reporter impelled a dead cit at random, and was kicked out. Hooray;- Sw$ Utltr. Mackerel Pie, A lady friend, who enjoys a high reputation for culin ary skill, scuds us the following recipe for mackerel pie : Soak and cook tfie fish ; boll some potatoes ; cut fish and potatoes in small pieces ; put in layers in a decn dish : season w ell w ith pep per, catsupand vinegar ; add plenty of but teranu a utile water; make upper and lower ciust. anil bake brown. There! if that Isn't equal to pumpkin soup, we are no judge. Tribuu The new drug called chloral, that Is ssid to produce drunkenness without its heretofore bad results afterwards, I. tv......,nii,ir vorir iioniitar. and IIS manufacture rapidly increasing. H o men in fasIuonabJe ch-e!es are getting addicted to its use, and drunkenness from chloral Is becoming very com inoii. ' The Central Padflo Railroad Com pany's steamers liaving raw their rate' on fires and freights to the o.d figures, the opposition boats but.r j&HMHlt'fli'ai'K B'e-i are going on ibe route between Sacramento and Ban Francisco again. iiiaoiaits. A Cinchmatti horse doctor- adver tises to teach a horse to slug, which suggests to the Boston Punt that we I have enough one-horse singers. Solmn. Alabama, lias a negro girl I who can skip fla? 1 ope with a pailful ! of slops on her head' and not sloy over. . . il "Corn bread?" said an Irl-lt waiter, I "we haven't got it ; and isn't it corn 1 bale ye nm tie?" Itoswell once aked Johnson if there I were no utAslble circumstances under which suicide would be ju -tillable. "Xo," was (lie reply. "Well," say Boswtil. "Suppose a man had In -on guidy of fraud tliat he was certain Would la) foil, id out If" Well, then," say Johnson, In that case let him go to softM) country w laro he is not kuowu ; aud not to the devil, where he fa known." ' : . Johney was tolling his ma how be was going to dress, aud show oil' when uc get. to no a main tits ma askcii : "Johney what do you expect to do lin n tiviiwv , In 11 ,'Ati in.t- ttt (in A -J' " """Si "" " If. " w fuau?" "Well, I reckon I'll get mar ried, and board w ith my wife's pa." A Hart fonl editor having twitted an ' editor in a neigliiioring city of being bald, subsequently apologised and ex plained that, "as long a: Can fold ids ears over iIkj top of his head, he dosen't need any hair any how." Western Judge is reported to liave thus addressed a prisoner before him prior to passing tlie sentence : "Pris oner at the lmr Providence has given you u good degree of health and strength. Instead of which you go around tlie country stealing ducks." An old lady give this as her idea of a great man : "One who is kcerfuj of bis clothes, don't drink spirits, kin read the Bible without spelling tlie words, and cat a cold dinner on wash day without grumbling." ScorrriB--Fjrst illeland man "She'll be te best whnsay I shall have tastit for efcrutore." Second do. "So tit I neither."' Third do. 'Neither tit I. too." A boy stealing chestnuts In a town not far from New York, was caught by the Irate owner of the trees. "Wlmt fa your name, von little- scamp?" he asked. "Tweed,'' blub bered the boy, whereupon the fright- ied tanner loosed His hOK anil lied." When yon go to drown yourself; put off your clothes; they may fit your wife's second husliaiid. A pretty, rich young widow was reganling herself lately at a mirror in her chamber, while for the first time trying on Ikt widow's etip. "Be hold," she exclaimed 'tlie real cap of liberty."' Tlaj Boston Post says Greeley's lec ture on "Wit" proves how long a man may talk without exhibiting any. An Irishman quarreling with art Englishman told him if Tic did not hold bis tongue he would break his Impenetrable head and let the brains out of his empty skull. "Well, my dear," said a good pas tor tit Sunday school to a tow -headed urchin, "lam glad to hear you are getting to be a better hoy." "Why, sir," said little Joe, looking lip with grave earnestness, gosh, l ain't beeu sick." A man sent a note to a rich neigh bor, with whom he w as on friendly terms, to borrow an ass for a few hours. The worthy old man was no scholar, and hap-adied to have a guest sitting with him at the time, to whom he did not wish to expose his ignor ance. Openhigthciiotcaiid pretending to read It. "S cry good, "said he; "tell you master I'll come myself presents iy." An old farmer's description of ft point ics preacher was: "A good man, likely, but he raked with the teeth up." Papa," said a little urchin to his father, the oilier dav, "I saw a print er go down the street-just now." Did you sonney? How did von know it was a printer?" ".Because 1 do, pa. "But he might nave been a carpen ter, blacksmith, or a shoemaker." "Oh, 110, ppa ; he was a printer likely an editor for he was gnawing at a bone, aud he luul no stockings on. The crown was out of bis hat. and his coat was all torn. I am certain lie was a printer." Tim Aftsistniit l'o t.nasU r of Chica go, who has teen in Washington lor some time to settle accounts with the Department, lias been informed by the Postmaster General that the Posi-. master of Chicago will la- creditt', with tlie amount of stamps ikt.stroyetl by the lire, shout f 120,000, but for the money he will liave to apply for relief to Congress. The English gunboat Grwtkr, sta tioned at Hhodes, is said to be in con stant pursuit of a Greek pirate, 'which has already captured many merchant vessels. The pirate fa completely equipped for a tight, but, wheu pur sued, take 10 uie uogs or cieeo, where the gunboat cannot follow. U fa a late day for pirates to exist. Iiobcrt Lincoln did not lose much by the great fire, as reported. His furniture and fine miscellaneous li brary were saved. He fa said to bu preparing to remove from Chicago, and commence the business of the law elsewhere. Gen. Buell is letting contracts oa ouc of the Texan railroads. JIHIIOIJ'I -sv, . - 1