The Albany register. (Albany, Or.) 1868-18??, June 03, 1871, Image 4

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    -, I , From tho Bdwardsrllle Republican.
My Experience with a. VeutriloquUt.
sr iiu HiWiioax. '
And
tarn an old bachelor. If yon suppose
I make this statement for the purpose of
BWakeniDsr your pity, joa mistake. I
: don't want it. If you know any one who
aoes, you have my permission to consti
tute yourself a coinoiittee ofoneto be
tow it on him without limit. But I don t.
I deliberately chose a life of single bless
edness, because I would rather live on
raw cutlets, burnt coffee, and bread ot a
melancholy nature, than eurtain lectures
and milliners' bills, 1 , V -
I once had a friend who wildly plung
ed into the quicksands of matrimony.
In vain I urged, implored, entreated.
Tbe g-xls must have decided upon his
destruction, for he was mad beyond a
doubt. His friends could do nothing
but go with him. to the sacrifice, and
then with a farewell clasp of the hand
1 and a tear in each eye, leave him to his
sad fate." ..'-.-....
. I met him three weeks later.
Poor fellow I ; Id the halcyon days of
our youth he was stout and ruddy alas,
what a chanire! Now bo could only have
weighed two hundred and seventy pounds
and his complexion, write! inisht once
. have successfully rivaled that of a boiled
beet, had faded to the shade of a brick.
In his hand he carried a bill for five hun
dred and sixty dollars, and on his classic
brow the distinct impress of a fire shovel.
I fled to my room, where I shed tears
f sympathetic grief. From that moment
my resolution was formed. I should
"never marry. Of course it was a great
Clow to ma young ladies or our town
when my determination became known
but I could not sacrifice myself for the
luppineas of one of them. V
I regret to say r that they survived the
shock. One of them should have gone
into a decline and 1'ouod peace in an early
crave, so that a second Madame de Staei
- might have pat us in a novel, a la Coriu
Butshe didn't.
' I expected to sail calmly, serenely
down the quiet stream of - life, without
one opposing ' ripple "to mar my perfect
pa;e. Was my experience a success
Kot any. . j
I failed to irrsrpess my sister witty
proper-idea ot the beauties ct celibacy
She cot married-. Girls most alwav do
I don't know what's the reason. Now if
' she .had chu?cu some one with the slight
est business faculty, I shouldn't have
cared. - But she must tie herself for life
to a poet, ons whoso store of greenbacks
was rather scanty, and whose stock of
silver and gold - conjisted entirely of
volume of rhyme about silvery waves
and golden suae"s. xhey jingle well
cnoucrh, but I - wo j' J rather have heard
the jingle of hi wash.;
Well, he died after awhile, of a parox
ysm 'occasioned bj readings Swinburn's
poems. My sister saom followed, leaving
her only child, a little girl of ten. to the
guardianship of her "dear brother George
who she knew woai J be glad to receive
. her little Erna, as the last proof of the
love and confidence of his sister-" How
did she know it? I didn't know it.
. But I was very , sorry for ; the - little
thing, orphaned so soon, and promised to
do for it all that lay in my power.
The heart of childhood is ever buoy
ant, and ere ; many weeks had elapsed
she had recovered from her grief. : Such
an incarnate imp of mischief I think I
never taw. : A dozen demons-seemed
lurking in those great black eyes, and
that curly .head, always concocting some'
- . scheme for tbe torment of others. ' She
played pranks on the-servants, threw ink
bottles at the governess, and surrepti
tiously abstracted her curls from the
bureau drawer for the adornment of her
pet kitten, hid my slippers and pipe, fell
into the mill pond, and nearly drowned
herself, and tumbled off her pony at the
imminent risk of breaking her Beck,
every day of her life. - - . ;
She kept tbe entire household in con
fusion, until the time came that she
could be sent to school. Then I breath
ed freely once ui ore. Four years of
peace and quiet. At the end of this
time, she came . back to me a bright,
winsome maiden, with just enough of
the old mischief to make , her gay and
charming. She was installed mistress of
my bouse, and a pleasant home she made
it with her happy ; music and sunny
- smile. . ,', - -- , . -. -:,r - b
AnJ all went merry as a anything
until finally Erna concluded to Fall iu
love. , You may have observed that
young people have a habit of falling ; in
love. Abont ten hundred out of every
thousand of them do. -Now, I should not
have objected, if she had only displayed
any discretion in the selection joT an ob
ject upon which to bestow her affections.
Bat they never do. Tha millionaire just
over the way would have been the proper
one fir her, and be loved her - fo distrac
tion. To be sure he was forty years her
senior, but wba of that ?. ., .
"Better to be an old man' darling," cte. r
as I frequently remarked in Erna's pres
ence. , But Frank. Hall most step in be
tween her and the diamond and bank
stock of Mr, Bullion. . It was very un
grateful after all I had done for him. He
had studied ' law with me, during Erna's
absence, and my bouse had been his
. home.- I "intended to take htm in as
partner next year. 'i"
Frank was talented, energetic, perse
rering. Jnst the kind of yonog man whom
1 should have been delighted to see mar
ried to my neighbor's neice or daughter,
as the case might bec and should have
. pronounced, tbe aforesaid ;, neighbor ;a
most unmitigated brute if ho had raised
. the slightest objection. -
But my Erna ah, well, that was al
together a different affair, you know.
I have other views ' for my niecef I
said, when he stated his hopes and wishes
"As s man I respect you, as a' friend -1
like rem Bat Erna can never1 be more
' to vou than she is now." :
It is customary in sensation novels' for
disapproving guardians to conduct offend'
- ing joong men to the door, an'f ob&erte
mtbSS' expression of hiso tragedy, at
. the seme time striking an attitude appall
ing. "From henceforth and forever--more
tbeso doors are closed against yon
Never cross this threshold again. Uo !"
in
trying to am use
I went into the
there excepting
then to consign the despairing
to ine-atiis. " -
water, Iut I woulU oot oo mis. x re
solved to display my christian forbear
ance, trusting to their goodsense that
all would come out right in the end. - j
TTnannhistioated. wasn't I f to trust to
tho good sense of a pair of lovers.
later. I was sitting alone
Khrnrv. The sun was setting, and as
its last rays looked lovingly on the dis
tant mountain-tpp, then sank into a sea
of gold, my thoughts went back to my far
away childhood, when I really believed
that its parting smile was, the light that
radiated from the Homo of the Blest,
when the gate of Ileaven was opened to
receive creation's lamp. Then from jojy
childhood through my youth, my busy
manhood, memory led me ; on until I
awcit witn a proud satisiaction on iiuv
present position.. The shades of twilight
were gathering around, and I was in that
delicious dreamy state, half way between
steeping and waking, when 1 was aroused
Dy nearmg turce gbostiy sounding raps
above me, and a sepulchral voice calling
my name. 1 am not superstitious, j but
tnat voice,: so dincrent from any X ever
heard before, frightened me. But after
a moment s reflection. 1 concluded that
it was only some one
htmseit at my expense,
parlor. No one . was
Erna. . "
'Is there any one but ourselves in the
house; r i - ,
"2io, uncle, she replied, looking up in
surprise. vV hy do you asK i ,
Uh I nothing, ouly 1 thought 1 beard
some one up stairs, a little while ago.
There is no one but ourselvts and tbe
servants.. But 1 nave learned- tlie song
vou brought me Yesterday. Shall I sing
it for vou r
The spirit .of music exorcised the spirit
of evil, and by the close ot the evening
had almost forgotten my singular adven
tare. :
The next day Frank called to see me
We were the best frieuds vet. He did
not cherish any resentment a'gainst me
We were in the hbrarv. when aain
that -, mysterious voice was heard
started un. thoroushly alarmed." i
"What is that ?" I asked Frank. ! "Did
you hear anything ?"
"No, what kind of a thing ? What is
the matter?" . !
"Nothing," I replied, not wishing to
show tho terror I felt. "I am a i littlo
morose to day. It will pass away direct-
ly." --l-vv
But it did not pass away. The' next
morning, at the breakfast table, I; heard
the voice aain ; this time pronouncing
the solemn warning. " "Prepare fop thine
end."' : :
1 I looked at Erna. She had not; heard
it evidently. ' -' j
This continued for a week, but no one
else ever heard it. I knew that my
earthly course was nearly ended. jEvery
day I felt life slipping away from, me. At
last there came a day I thought would be
my last. .. ' j
"Is there anything I can do for you,
any provision I cau make for your com
fort?" I asktd of Erna, after J I had
told her that I mnst leave her so soon.
"Oh, dear uncle ! she sobbed, behind
the little cobweb she called a handkert
chief. "Nothing can be of any value to
me, when you are gone." j
I sent her away from me then, and sent
a messenger for Frank. As he came to
my side, I clasped his hand in mine and
Faid. "Do you still lovo Erna ?" j
. "Better than my life," he replied in an
earnest tone, that convinced meof his
sincerity. ; . .. . j. . -
"The scales have fallen from my eyes.
As I near the boundary of the unseen
land my vision becomes clearer, and I am
enabled to see wauy, things differently
from what .1 have ever done before. I
know, now, that it was wrong to part you
and Erna. I shall soon be gone, and my
poor little dove will have no protector.
If she loves you I give her to you,- and
may you be happy." ; ! e
"Sly kindest, dearest friend ! I cannot
thank you as you deserve. But it may
not be as yoa think. You may live to
see the happiness yoa have coufWred on
me. If you would have medical advice."
"No, do," I interrupted, "it (ill soon
be all over.with me. I have felt since I
first heard that' warning, that ' my days
were numbered." . I
"Do you pledge your word that,
whether you live or die, Erna shall be
mine I" j - " !
"Yes, I cannot trifle in so solemn an
hour." ' t
Was this the sound you heard?"
Again that voice fell upon my'ear. '
"There it.isngaid," I gasped, feebly.
"Calm your fears," said he.'. "You
must know that I have been taking les
sons of a ventriloquist. Whed you re
fused to let me have Erna," I resolved to
make you revoke that decision. 1 knew
of no way to do it but to work upon your
tear.', so .1 muttered the words that have
frightened you. so. Dear Mr. Stan wood,
don't be very angry. You know every-.
thing is fair in love or war." i
Jupiter . Ammoo ! Wasn't I furious ?
I lay there for about ten seconds glaring
in impotent rage at Frank hall, j At the
end of that time, a young . man might
have been seen hurriedly descending the
stairs, with poker and boot-jack in close
pursuit. . I didn't die, thought I was
very angry. If I had had the small pox,
I should have survived it. But I unani
mously voted : ventriloquism a humbug
and a nuisance. - . '
The Little Peddler.
One raiuy afirnooa,; in the earliest
part of autumn, I heard a low knock at
my back door, and opening it I found a
peddler. Feddlers sre a great vexa
tion to me ; they leave the gates open ;
they never nave anything I want, and I
A young man wrote to a Boston paper
asking whether it would be advisable for
him to marry a "young and tender angel,
who had never done her own washing
and dressmaking." In reply, the editor
advised him to do so by all means, and
mentioned a similar case in his own ex
perience, where the bride had never done
ber own washing, bat after marriage she
became sv fond of the wash tub as not only
to work" for her own- family, but for
several families among her own acquaint
ances. ' , "; . ; , .
- The Worcester (Mass,) py is. down
on ,the British sparrows. It charges
them .with neglecting the devaMing worm
for the sake of rioting in ' the tempting
grain of the honest farmer, and also with
much rudeness to their hosts, the robin
and the oriole, which are driven away
from their ancestrial huuntt ' by th
don t like the faces that belongs to the
most of them, especially ; those of the
strong men who bo about with little
packages of coarse' goods j and I always
close the door upon them. Bavinir to'mv-
self, "lazy.": ' .u---H ii;.;
This was a little boy, and he was pale
and wet, and looked cold, I forgot he was
a peddler, and asked him to come in by
the fire. I thought he appeared as though
he expected I was going to buy, some
thing, for' he commenced opening.' his
tin box, but I had no such -intention. 'He
looked up in my face very earnestly and
sadly, when I told him to warm himself
by tbe hre, and that I did not wish to
purchase anything. '' He Tore slowly from
his seat, and there was something in his
air which reproached nic, and I detained
him to inquire why he was out in ...the
rain. He replied : r ..: ,-rr
"I am out every day, and can't stay in
for a little rain ; besides, most ,, peddlers
stay at home then, and I can sell moro
on rainy days. .:
"How much do you earn in a day ?" -
"sometimes two nillmrs, and some
times one, and once in a while I get noth
ing all day, and then, ma am, 1 am very
tired.
Here he gave a quick,-dry cough, that
startled me.
"How long have you had that cough ?"
"I don t know, ma am. .
"Does it hurt you ?"
"Yes ma'am."
, "Where does your mother live ?"' -
"In heaven, ma'am," said he, unmoved
"Have you a father ?" :
"Yes, ma'am, he is with mother." h
replied, in the same tone.
, "Have you any brethers or sisters?
"I had a little sister, but she went to
mother about a month a-ro " :
"She wanted to see mother, and so do
I, and I guess that's why I cough so.
"Where do you live ?" -
"With Mrs. Urown.on N street.
"Does she jrivo vou anv medicine - for
your cough?"
"Not doctor s : medicine ; she is, too
poor ; but she makes soiuethioir for me
to take." " - -
"Will you take something, if I
to you?"
"No, ma'am I thank you ; mother took
medicino, and it didn't hep her, though
she wanted to stay, and you see I want
to 20 ; it would not : stop . my coui-ht
Good-day, ma'am."
"Wait a mioute," I said, "I want to see
what you carry. .
He opened his box, and for once
found what I wanted Indeed, I don'
think it would have mattered what he
had. I should have wanted it,' for the
little peddler ; had changed in my eyes
he had a father and mother in heaven
and so had I.,' 11 ow strange; ' that ped
dlcrs had never seemed people human
soul-filled beinsrs before ! How thankful
he was, and how his great blue eyes-look
ed into mine when 1 Yaiu htm !
"You don't ask me' to take a cent
less," said he. after hesitating a moment
"I think you must be very rich
"O, no," I replied. "I am far from
that, and these things are worth mora to
me now than what I gave you for them
Will you come again ?"
' "Yes, ma'am, if I don't go to moth
soon." ' . " ""
"Are you hungry ?" . ,,. r
"No ma'am. I never feel "hungry now
I sometimes think mother feeds me when
I sleep, though I don't remember it when
I am awake.- 1 only know 1 qod t wish to
eat now, since my sister died. .
"Did you feel very sad ?"
"I felt very big iu my throat, and
was choked : but I didn't , cry a bit
thontrh I felt very lonely at night for
while: &ut I am triad, she is op - there
now." i - ' -
"Who told vou vou were going to die ?'
"Vohoilv : but I know ' I am. 1'er
baps I'll ko before Christmas."
I could not endure that, and tried to
hare him stay ; but he. would run and
fall Mrs. Brown whatluck.be had" met
with. lie bade me good day again, cheer
fnllv. and went out into the : cold rain
while I could only say, "God be wit
you my child." ' , '
lie never came again, tnougn l loone
for hint every day. At length,- abou
iNew 1 ear, 1 went to tho pUee he oalle
home. Mrs. Brown was there, but th
little pil-rrtni a weary feet were at rest
and never more would his gentle knock,'
be heard at-the doors of those, wlo, like
myself, forgot the necessary and stern
way that often sent about these wander-.
ers from house to house, and their em
ployment might be unseemly to then
than annoying to us. ,- . ...
It is pleasant to read-once in a while
of a man who doesn't make a row - over
the slight- disappointments of tL is life.
There is a fellow living in this city who
found his wife in receipt from a '"friend
of letters almost as "passionate as those
which C wrote to " his 'jdarling
love." ; But this man wasn't of the
McFarland stripe. - He put the letters,
icstead of a pistol, in his pocket, and
went in search of the destroyer of his
peace, with a very serene ! countenance,
lie found him, and said i"My dear sir,
you've taken a liking to my wife, and
she appears to reciprocate. 1 have taken
a dislike to' my wife, and I dou't object
to your taking possession of the property.
If you get her outside of my house witt -iu
twenty-four hoars, I'll call it square.'
If you don't, I'll commence 'suit for dam
ages. : Aro .you agreeable ?"- The vile
seduecr was agreeable, and there was no
shooting, nor any pleasant reading for
the, papers to publish, j.' , : : . ,
4"And here is another case where the
man didn't cut up rusty, but made light
of his loss : A-man was divorced from
his wife, and she married anotber. wbere
cpon husband No. 1 inquired of husband
No, 2. " What relation are you to me"?"
'None that I know. of.;,. .".Yes you are,"
said No. 1 ,"youare my step husband--I
stepped out and you stepped in."..,..-
A well known clergyman was crossinsr
Lake Erie, some yearsago, npon one of
the Lake steamers, and seeing a small
lad at the wheel steering the vessel, he
ccostcd him as follows : , .
'3Iy son, yeu appear to be a small boy
to steer so large a boat?"
"Yes sir," was the reply, "but you see
can do it, though." . .
Do you think you understand your
business, my son ?"
yxea sir, 1 think I do. : .
"Can you box the compass ?"
"Yea sir eri'J- s frf-t'S
"Let tne hear you box it ?" : "
J he boy did as he was requested, when
the minister said ; - . .
"Well really you can do it. Can - you
box jt backwards ?"
"Yes sir." . . , .. ....
4i Let me -hear you ?"
Tbe boy did as requested, . when the
minister remarked :
"I declare,' my son ! You do seem to
understand your business."
The boy then took bis turn at question
ask in g.' begi n ni ng :
Tf'Pray sir, what might be your busi
ness .7.; -.-I. ., 1 -
"I am a minister of the gospel."
"Do you understand your business?"
"I think I do. my son." -
"Can you say the Lord's prayer?"
"Yes."
"Say it."
The clergyman did so, repealing the
words in a fervent manner, as though
trying to make an impression on the
lad;
"Well, really, said tho boy upon its
conclusion, "you' do know it, don't you ?
jNow say it backwards.
"Oh,. I can t do such a thing as that
of course." ' V
.'You can't do it, eh ?" returned the
boy. "Well, then, you see, I understand
my business a great deal better than you
do yours.
The clergyman acknowledged himself
beaten and retired.
Youug- America at the Wheel."
New Textile. The Jkrmers of Illi
nois have had great trouble with a weed
called tire iodiau mallow, which grows
iu great abundance on tbe rich prairies
and bottom lands, and which has been
considered even a greater nuisance than
the Canada thistle. , If it once gets on
farm, it remains in spite of all efforts to
exterminate it. The Springfield Register
says that this obnoxious weed, which per
cists in thriving in dehance or all at
tempts to exterminate it from the soil,
destined to become one of the most valu
able productions of tbe State, i A youiu
man named J..1I. O'Conuel has discover
ed that the fibrous formation of the stalk
of the mallow is capable of being brough
into use, and has taken out a patent cov
ering the right to use this pjaut tor man
ufacturitig &ll kinds-1 of cordage, textile
fabrics, aud paper, and has exhibited
specimens of paper made therefrom. The
fibre which is seven to ten, and some
tunes even twelve leet in lengtn, comes
from the stock with less labor than
needed to dress hemp. When ' rotted
the fibre separates entirely from the glu
tinou3 and woody matter," so that the
tedious and expensive process of hatchel
ling is not required. - It can be bleached
to a snowy whiteness withont Iostng any
portion of its strength; and readily and
firmly" holds any color which flax will no'
do. It is said that the new fibre will
yield twice as much hemp, say a ton to
the acre.. It will grow readily on medi
um sou. and alter the first vear will nec
no cultivation, as ineo uBtablished on the
lapd there is no method known by which
it can be killed out. If the merits of
this fibre arc not - exaggerated, Mr.
O'Connell has made,'a discovery of ineal
cutable value. i
We extract the following interesting
octdent from "Sketches of the Olden
ime," contributed by Mr. J. A. Dacus
to the St. Louis Bepublican :
In the year 1838 the Autocrat took on
board at Vicksburg -
FOUR PROFESSIONAL DESPERADOES
as passengers bound to St. Louis. The
boat had a large number of passengers
aboard, and the "professionals" could not
How an opportunity so promising of
fruitful results to . pass unimproved.
Among the passengers was a young man,
who had been intrusted with a large sum
of money by friends iu the East to invest
in real estate in t ho .West,' Being of an
unsuspicious disposition and wholly un
acquainted with the state of society then'
prevailing in the southwest, the courte
ous and specious rascals very soon . ob
tained a kuowledge of tbe fact that lie
had money. " He was
"WORTH CULTIVATING
and immediately an tneir arts were
brought into play, tors fleece their' fellow
passenger. Games were proposed. The
young man did , not play. They finally
succeeded in getting him to drink wnu
them. They then felt certain of their
prey ; but to their astonishment he was
more cautious than ever, and rudely re
pelled every euort to engage him in a
game ot hazard. Days passed on yet
they made nothiog out of him, but a few
drinks. Something must be done. .The
four confederates at last resolved upon
murder as the best and only means ot
getting this obstinato young man's money.
One night he as seen to enter his state
room. The next morning the room, was
vacant : the out, or guard side door was
oocn,a few drops of blood in the bed
unen, and a pool ot the same on the floor
was all that gave" any clew to ; his fate.
I he passengers, however, fixed suspic
ion upon the four Vicksburg accessions.
There was no evidence, but :
CIRCUMSTANCES POINT STRONGLY
toward them. A deputation headed by
entleman who was still alive two years
ago and living in Louisville, Ky., waited
upon tho officers of the boat and de
manded the speedy disembarkation of the
tour worthies. . 1 he Captain cheerfully
complied. The boat was brought to at
Island No 34, or Miller's Island, about
seventy five miles above Memphis, and
the passengers from Vicksburg were or
dered ashore. The island at that time
was supposed to be uninhabited since
tbe departure of Fred. Frankenstein, the
woodman, who had for some years before
kept a wood-yard to supply passing steam
boats. For some mouths he had been'
away! as he was the only known resident
ot the island, it was now supposed to De
destitute of human inhabitants. But
Fraokenstein who had only journeyed
for a bhort time on the main land bad
returned the evening before from Ran
dolpli with a small boat load of supplies
for his island cubiu.. 11c was well known
to many of the people of Randolph and
was known to possess a considerable
sum ot money. xne caoin or me
woodman had been generously tendered
to the exiles from the Autocrat. That
night, in tho still and shadowy hours
when no -sound ; broke the silence that
brooded over the German's ilaud home,
his guests lose np
A3!) MURDERED tUJI
there as he lay asleep, perhaps dreaming
peaceful dreams of the far off, vine clad
hills by'tbeiUiiue. f
-...When his friends from town according
to promise previously made came to visit
him on' the following day, they found his
skull cloven assunder, and he Jay welter
ing in his own blood, a ghastly corpse.
Some years afterward, a felon under the
gallows at Marshal, Texas, told bow
Frederick Frankenstein died on the
island that night.- 11
NEW ADVERTISEMENTS.
3E-A17:XZS3N-'E'
S HEREBY GIVEU, THAT' I BlZ
opened a
lAvery ana fc'eea stable !
in tbe town of LEBANON, where I will be eon.
tantly on Band to attend to tbe . waota of the
X Will run m bkc i rum aiiwh w muhw uq
Soda Spring, oo Saturday of each week.
All bouDose extracted t mjr can will be
prompUv attended to. - - - ' ; - - '
' . VV ; . JB. JJVJiXJXJA.
tebnon, Sept. 10, 1870 lrSmS
A FEW REASONS WHY
TIIE-
A New Hampshire young lady, Mary
Brockway, recently celebrated her one
hundred and fourth birthday jn East
Washington, by splitting and " carrying
iLto llie bouse hall a cord vrwooq,
Attachment to . Newspapers.
Th'e.etrong altaclimeut of subscribers to
well conducted newspapers is fully con
firmed by publishers,. . f'rftop my paper!"
words of dread to new beginners Jo the
business, lose their terrorafter, a paper
has been established, 'for' a. term,of years.
So long as a paper pursues a just, honor
able aud? judicious cowse, meeting the
wants Of its customers in' all respects, the
ties ot friendship between the subscribers
and the paper are as hard to break by
any outside third party as the links which
bind old friends iu business or social lite.
Occasional defects and errors in a news
paper are overlooked by those who have
become attached to it through. its perusal
tor years. They may sometimes become
dissatisfied with, it on account of 'soms
thing which has slipped into its columns,
and may stop taking it; but the absence
of the familiar sheet at' their house or
effice for a few, weeks becomes an ipsup
portable deprivation, aud they hasten to
take it again, , and possibly, apologize for
haviug stopped it. ' This we believe t? bp
tbe common experience in the history of
all established newspapers." No friend
ship on earth' is more constant than that
contracted - by the reader fofcik-; journal
which' makes an honest and earnest effort
to merit his continued support. - .
FRENcn Politeness. i-A young gen
tleman, lodging iu a narrow- street : of
Paris, lately conceived himself enamored
of a lady who appeared occasionally at an
opposite wiudow. With, the freedom of
modern Lovelaces, he enclosed a copper
coin in a billet-doux, to give it the nec
essary weight, and threw it with sufficient
force, against the closed .sash, to, break a
pane of glass and go through. - His own
window was left open, and, in a few min
utes after a cold roat chicken - entered
from the opposite side, to the leg of
wfiich was attached the - following note :
"Monsieur, You., take advautage ot a
means of correpondiiig with my wife
which proves 'you to have read the Span
ish romances to" some profit. While I
allow your ingenuity i however pnllow me
to express a wish that, jourj Juture
love-letters to her by tbe same post, you
will let the .enclosed weighrs be pt tUver
instead of copper, thai I may be able to
repair the broken pane of glass at your
expense, kx'tt 'i:'0"'"'-'""' '
t Your-humblojservant, ... j. . ;
-s r Louis Napoleon is reported ill at Chisel
hurst confined to his room. His hair
is said to have ' grown ' white since tho
surrender of Sedan, and he ascribes the
change fo bis confinement at Wilhelnis
hohc and . the absence of his favorite
ba'.r dye." " " -"".
A R I O IM : P I A NO
SUPERIOR TO ALL OTHERS.
THE ARION PIANO-FORTE baa Greater
Power than any other other Piaifo-Forte mana
faotnred. - ,
IT- WILI,; STAND IN TUNE LONGER
and in its mechanical construction it it more per
fect, and therefore, more durable than any instru
ment constructed in the usual modern style.
The arangement of the Agraffe, the manner of
stringing. the peculiar form and arrangement of
the Iron frame, . ; .
Supersedes all oilicrs.
The nse of a hart. (which is a part of - the Iron
Frame) on a line with the heavy steel stringing
gives
Great Strength
Where most needed, and in this respect all other
Pianos fail.
The construction of the WREST yLASK, Into
which the Tuning Pins are inserted, is such that it
s impossible for thq pins to become loosened, or
the Wrot Plank itself to split, as is too often the
case in other Piano-fortes,
TUB EXTRAORDINARY EVEN
. NESS,
Throughout the entire scale, the excellent Singing
Quality, tbe
Length and Purity on Vibration,
AH go to prove what we claim, vix. : that the
Arion Piano-Forte
Is tbe Best Instrument ' Manufactured
f
A III O N P IANOS
' .Are used Exclusively in the
AMERICAN CONSERVATORIES
OF MUSIC
of 3few York city.
Toe most severe test a pann can receive is con
ttant u?e in a Conservatory.
Tails , Our. During our travels in
Oregon, says , a tourist, we heard , some
fuouy stories, and this is one of thoia ;
A couple of travelers, who were lock
ing lor land, chanced to stay over at a
tarui house in a sparsely settled district.
The house had ouly one room, and the
accommodations were of the most prime
val character. When bedtime approached
a piece of- blanket was - hung across the
room, the,. travelers took ' their moiety of
the apartment, and darkness and silence
reigned through the dwelling. Ie ap
peared that the chickeus, for want of a
better place, roosted on the flour barrel;
and wbeo it was supposed that "Nature's
sweet restorer" had got hold of the
guests, tho good wife addressed her liege
lord :
"I say, John, if you'Pc going to keep
a hotel, you must make different arrange
tuents." - . -"-'- -' -
"Why, Sarah Jane?" returned , the
sleepy husbaud.
"Because I'm not going to get up in
this fix to turn the tails of theiu chick
ens." ,
Baggage Smashing. A revengeful
traveler on a certain railroad in this State
packed a .carpet-bug full of revolvers -aud
gave it to a gentlemanly baggage smash
er, who had ruined three or lour- trunks
for him already. The smasher flung the
bag up against the wall savagely, and
hen threw icon the floor and stamped
upon and jumped up and down upon it as
usual. At about the fourth jump firing
began along tho whole, line. Forty-six
revolvers went off in rapid succession,
distributing bullets along the car with
disgusting carelessness, hitting the legs
of the smasher, who wa3 shot iu six
places before he could get ' out of tbe
car. . lie rode upon-the platform during
the whole trip, and when he, did euter
the car he encased his legs in a stovepipe,
and run an irou-clud snow-plow in front
of him to puidt the the baggage out with,
lie smashes,' perhaps, fewer carpet bugs
now than he did iu the punt much fewer
and he is filled with horror. The only
boon he craves is that he liiay be present
when the carpet-bag owner calls with his
check. . He says there will be a conflict
which will make the Euiopean war: ap
pear ridiculous. ' - - . -
r The Rev; Benjamin Eaton, of Trinity
(Episcopal) Church, Galveston ,Texas,
while preaching on the suddenness and
awfulness of death, on 4 recent Sunday,
full in the pulpit, and died almost imme
diately. h : . - . ... .. r , . , ..
A Chicago minister, after repeating
the story ofJoseph and Potiphar's wife,
said there was not a joang man to the 5t tt i
try that would not pronounce Joseph a
foolc-:-j. .-V -ti--tii-.- fa,-t--t&':&i-. f
Read The Following::
It affords me much pK ante lo give yon, in iLesa
few lines, a very sinecretestimiminl for tho Piano
Vorles of your laanul'm-tiire. We have now used
the 'Tateut Arton Viiinos" in our Conferva fc riut
torn year, and have had a furr yportanity of test
iu their durability during tkat time. The Piano
have lecn plarc-d npon almost, constantly, from
m..mi:i j till nicht. and a Piano mnst indeed be
"ood one when it will bear such constant use with
out showing S'K"4 of defection. -As for fcnuminy
Ai huM. it. .ut rltJn anv Piano known to ni
1 Thnir ruviitiar wui,:ess of tnne hi the treble
fas compared to other Pianos with oe ordinary
metal aprafle arrangement ) ii so striking tnat
have had pupils remark, while taking thei'rlRsun
iliHt altouuiib they had at home what tbey fcuT
posed to be ono of the best makes-of Pianos, si ill
thetreble was very wirey toned compared with the
"ARIOX." :- -' - - -
- Wbat makes them still more desirablo is their
uniform volume of time, wbii h enables an Attist to
perform a composition in i-s true character..
In total, I cau conscientiously eadone all that is
claimed by the Arion Pran - Forte Company for
their superb instrument, as I consider them su
perior to any ether make. s " . "
Cone;ratnlattne you apon the great success you
t ave obtained in tbe manufovture of so perfect an
instrument, I remain yours, - - ,
... .' .'.".- . Verv truly, '
. HEJJKY SCHIIQEDKR,
. . . Director.
New Tork, Scptcinhcr 3, 1ST0.
WEW TO-lAY.
$3,000
BET ON TUE ELECTION I
Any oaetafct KfcMsl Jia. ean de ao hy
vi'te the attention of Linn eonnty el ., to :
their unequalled stock of j
DRUGS, M'EDICINfeS, CIIEMICALS,
PAINT & VARNISH BRUSHES,
PAINTS, QlLS,iVARNISnES,
AlfGOHOW KEROSENE,
WINDOWfIiASS,
' ,TR U"S-ES,
FANCY - AND ' TOIEET ABTICXBg, ETC.
Aeents for Dr. D. layoc k Pon's preparations,
H. II. II. Horse Med vein as, etc.
Do yoa like medicine for its bitter ot nauseat
ing taste? - We have that description. I9 yoa
want the enact witn an aromaiio xasnar Alter
taking a few doses of onr Elixir, 'twill be" SO very
pleasant luairyour prejuuivca . r
.MuBtnrelytrB.awryi -J"
and the preparation ". H ' .'
- n m lose tbe name o" poyaio.
(bat not thoeffecU)--s- r mi v ... !-.;.
Physicians and customer from - tha esnotry
may Test assured that their-orders will be prompt
ly attended to. Presoriptionvcorefiuly and eor-
rect1y,componnded. ' , ., f .. .. r .
Wave you tbe impolite guest called a corn T wo
sell "Cera Blayer," which surely "does the work,
without pain IM yu desire a book of any kine,
a Hold Pen,-an Albntu Statisnery, or aneb-T W.
S. lripes is with ttm, tor tbe accommodation of
all favoring him with; eall.' -' s''-' '
Do you wanl-a tine Watch," a. 'et of Jewelry,
cheap or dear? J.D.-1itus st-lls the some, under
tbe same roof.'
Come and sec us, - Buy a Boolu- ' Buy a Watch.
Buy a Pill. Buy something oraotfainirrbnteome
and soo us, any way, A well sprinkled 4wr and
a cool drink of water in tbe summer, aad a warm
stovo surrounded by eomfnrtable e-hnirft in winter
constantly kept for tho aeeomerodatioB of all.
Albany. May 14,.'70-3B . .... '.. , . .
R.H.r.icD0H alii aco.,
f DRUGGISTS,?
Call the attention of Dealers to their 1rr V"'
ment of " Kewly Arrived " Gooo. com ryovA to
mrt tyf tho followlnK articles, tofwtner witn
everr thlnv kept in a well supplied WHOLK
BALK BEl'U STOKE. , v
Falun Dnrros,
Patkxt Manicrsrae. -Tsunna
SnppoaTUU
Essaa-riAi. Oils,
Tii.rKK' warJtA'a
Divsenrs' Bmrnaixa,
PurcMinu.
Paikt ajid Oils
, AGENTS WANTED
We want llrst-elast and responsible Agents in
every city and town where we hare not already ap
pointed them. ,;
XV e liave just Published
Our annual Illustrated Pamphlet, which contains
a full description of the interior construction of the
Patuut Arion PumVForte, and all tbo other lead
ing Pianos of the principal makes; illustrated with
cuts, thus cotraatiug the Arion with all other first-cla-'s
Pianos, ond proving
Why and Where .
Our Pianos are superior to any in the market.
Onr pamphlet contains engravings of all tbe dif
ferent styles ef instrumenti that we manufacture,
giving a full description of cadi, so that a person
can select the style they may desire to order, with
the assurance that they will receive just as good a
Piano as if tbey were in onr wareronms to select it.
We have sold over Five Thousand Piauos.many of
them being shipped great dirtanres, and we have
never yet received the 6rst complaint. As we give
a written guarantee with every Piano we manufac
ture, for five yean, the purchaser run no rifk.
Zhm'tfail tieriUfor or nattphUl w)iichvesiail
LVre, and mIm yoa ierf( tate want Jx'ptr go saw
X. 11. We caution the public from purchasing a.
coeap riano, woicn nas recently been pot in the
market, bearing tha name "Arion." All genuine
Arion Piano bttar the name "Patent Arion," and
ean only be purchased from onr Kew jfork Ware
rooms, or our authorized Agents throughout tbe
I'nited States. -. '
T , All kind of-.
SIcsIcal Instruaenls r
Snppliedi
ASbBBSS TUB
""a
d ..4 ,.;.
Ar,:::j n ::3-rcTE cc:
.' . K.'iM Broadway, yew"Tih rny.
Whietiwe oer at -the lowest Cask Price, anoj 5
are decenmneo. nos to oo dquckwiu.
B.H. MCDONALD CO., Sax rsAVCUCO, CaI
rOB SA3UB,
Our Dne Bwslneaa, located in San Fran
riseo, Cal. Atter onr bet wUhea, and express
ing our thanks for the liberal patronage
we have received for "more than twenty-one
years, during which period we have been steadily
en-aged in the Drug business in- California, wa
beg le nay in consequence of the rapid grewtA of
Dr. Walker s California Vinegar Bitter, aow
spread ever tbe United Statoe and countries far
beyond , we are neeesf itated to derpta .r -entire
time to said bnint . 'J"' ll";' ,' - ' '
We aro tlie Oldest Drug firm "Eti tlie rciflc,
Cit and the. only one. eontinnens nnder tio
same proprietors since! 184S, and hove determmtd
to sell our lirge,prorpeTo, and well established ,
bnifincsa rtn' favorable terms. '
This is a rare opportunity for men with means,
of entering into a profitat-le business with advent
topes never before offered. ,c
. For particulars entnifre ef -,
. K. 11, M-lOXAI.D A CO.,
R. n. JleDojralB ' Wholesale. Druggists'.
J. C. KPEner.n, )t - Pan Franeiaco, Cal.
N. B. Until a sale is made we sbaH continue .
our importation end keep a large stork of fresh
roods coBfltawlly on feaad, and sell at prices to
defy competition. i .( '- ':' - '
The CreaUMcdicAl Biscorery I
Sr. TALKEa'S OAXJ&OB&XA ;
YIREGiVa BITTERS,
rS-.- Hundred of Tltoxisands
x ' ii f --v Bear tenOia jy t thrtr Woo4e- & 3
o'S tot Cnrattvw umrtm. - - t g
, ia VVHAT.i .RE .TIIY?f5
Bzl s, v: si
Z Z ' ' 'A - ' viiL ' . Eg
gls - -cy hit
Si! Vy' , lit
i
THET ARK NOT A VIXE
D R I N K ,U
'a rj
Is F A N C Y
Mad of Pssr ltia, Wallksrr rrsrf
' Bptrtta andfifaa lie.siraloctore!.plced ,
and sweetened to ploese tho taste; called "Ton. '
les,"" AppetUera," Beatarers." ac tnat lead ,
the tippler on to drnnkennesa and rate, but are
a true Medicine, made from theXatlve Boota aad
Herbs or California, free flran sill Aleonvlla
Btttnalanta. They are UwUKIATBLOOD
PCRIF1EK stn4 L.IFE QITIMU FttlN-
. f!TVl V TMrCAAt IteBAVAla, and tantnittlor of
: restoring he blood to a healfny eondtOon. Ko .
person can take these Bitter aceordlng to dlree- .
" tlon and remain long nnwelL. - - -
For Iataaamtuori' nad Chronic Rhaa
. aasttlasB srael Usat, . Uraoeaola. mr lm4lm
reottoa, Slltosw, Becnltteat nad later
; mitten Fever, Dleooeea of tlse Blood,
1,1 ver, Kidneva, and Dlaalaer, these Bite ,
. tor have been, moat nooessToU Back IMaa.
emaea are canndyby Vitiated Blood, whlca.
- la geaerany prodneed by deraiuremant of the.
Tlaettv Orsasi.
DYSPEPSIA OB 1NDIGKBTIOX.
Beadacbe. Pain in the Saoaiders, Coagbs, Tlgbe
nes of the Chest, PIzxiness, Soar Eructation of
the Stomach, Bad taste la tlie Mowta. BiUons At. '
tack. Palpitation of the Heart, Inflammation ot
tlio Lunfi.Pmln In tho regions of tlie K.ldney. and .,
bnndred other patnfnl symptom, are the off- -
springs of Dyspepsia.
' They Invigorate tbe Stomach and stimulate tha
- torpid liver and bowels, which render them of ua
aquallod efficacy la eleanalng the blood of alt
Impurities, and Imparting new life and vigor to
'... the whole ystBT. . ".ii "-
FOB SKIN BI8 ABBS, ErnptlomuTetter,
- Salt Bbeum, Blotches. Spots. Pimple. Pastolea,
Boils. Carbanclos, Blng-Worma, Seald-Bead. Sore :
yea, Zrvalpelaa, ltcb, Scnrf. Dhwoloratloa of
th Skin, Humor and dMaease of the Skin, of -i
whatever name or natnre, are literally dag anv,
and earned oot or th ytem In ebort time by
the via of thee Bitter. . Ona bottle-In toea
cases win ooavlaee the moot Ineredolous of thalr . v
' earatlv effecU. " '"
, -doaaao too Vitiated Stood whenever yon Hod ,
- Its Imparltte ooisUaa: throeurlt the ikla to Pha- .
; plea, BrBptieaeor bores t oeaaaeU when yoa'
And It oestnieted and slaa-iah In the voinsi ,
. dranai It wboa It la foal, and yow feeltag will
. ell yoa wbosw; Imp the biooo) prr- and th. .
health of thrrtoow1Ufo"'w.
i PIK, TArt and other rvIS,1orlrna-la,
taotrstataof ww-t - are eooetaally . "
doatrojrod and rvaoved. ror t u direetlons, read -arefUlythcuBarjoad
ehbotUo. - -J.
WAlJtJt3. Propriety. rt rcDONAXD
CO., DrrU a4 Oon. A. a. haa rraaclaco,
CalsUaadMComittarosStsW. irew York.
soLP vr aiv iuircaiTs atd healers-