HllL&ftOftO ABQU3 NOvCMBtR 4,
r''hW
TWO OLU TIMK MASON
,1,1 lint Maaooe attended h
llilhrM.k A I' A HI
On wa Atniumti Hill ..i ,1,.
ho'lml wh'HU warechaili-i memlr, f ,h o.U-r .-ll.il,
i. ll...l fitav
.7.1.1 U,l wera
kn"" ! i I u bla ..nrh .. II
lltl n(
eiiiiiirnt rraji tar,tt v
lit
i.l '.
I. IMllry.
i . I . I H u I ( .
v: iii " 1 ":: . ltZ r, .. ... : 7 7 : r "",r" "
'W in i'IkiH"" 1 "'""T' ""' ,' . r..r, ti,
.ba , I I,, rine.nl Hw- Pl' I'l Hie loll.l,.,,, ,,.. .l.l
l l.llf " . . LI. Hill IU.I rlllr.l I1..I I-II , . . .
mil 11 mM'li mii-i wiiii 11 1 11 A,m, l,,.l, ,,r
I.llllt
hi. I'li-M-iii fdii.
,l." , If.iic """ ,B,n " " fli.r. II, r .l,,,,,,l.
;lrr hi-tr. (nil now llvr. I
.....I AV.IIIM. IIW W Ill till Mil,! - . ,
'i"" : " .1 11.. M It faith to hold seivliri lip lit Hi (.iri-i.vilu
wlito ( Ult late KV, liilllin, (.iiiiirri i,( iM.-
tbf II' ' I ,, inrrlil H , IW'ieuil una II I nillr. r. ,,
,U lw 1, ,, rn since IKI. ' " "' 'lii mi !
' -Kmc"' 'r,r' .... ,, ,,. i... ,
v-i.-,,,,M
1
Ufv. W. 1. Klng:
Aluiur.u tlilt
...
.! t...J..i,l
yOLYBlPIC FLOURw J
-Mother. V"IJ 1 I
ff OLTMrio Flopr U m-le from ?M c i 1
I II wheat, thoroly c!eneI and m-ouri'd f JRt(LC
II by the nicwt tuodern mKhod known, f tfTTf
All tb nutritlou qnalittr of the rfl3MlN
II whrat are n'taimnl and It rcbM you inOlTtNTv
i dtanaiul pure and wholfiwrna. If your mIJ$
I di aler cau't xupply you, write ua and we'll t"X7YtTI1'
1 tell you who can but don't lake any ; UXyJjPr
U other than Olympic lnjUt ujoa it J
AT YOUR GROCER'S
Si
'S STRATAGEM.
It Saved Mary's Lover When She
Henel! Would Have Failed.
Ulwwf
Hmimijr," iit ancwem)
PROTECT YOUR HORSE
PROTECT YOURSELF "
This is the seafon whcu you need blankets for
)'mr animal. -Come and see our
HORSE BLANKETS
Now $1.75 and up.
When you are driving you endanger your health
unless you keep Warm. Take a look at our hand
some PLUSH ROBES, STORM ROBES
Prices to Suit.
dive me a call when you want ucw harness.
Wc have what you want and our prices are below
competition.
Substantial Repairing a Specialty
A. M. CARLILE. Second Street
ANNOUNCEMENT
The Royal Bakery & Confectionery Incorporation,
sole manufacturers of Royal Tabic Queen Bread,
;ivc made arrangements with the enterprising
firm of ,
WYATT (O. CO.
whereby, the said firm of Wyatt & Co., will be ex-
;. elusive agents for
-AOYAL TABLE QUEEN BREAD
The best bread on the market. Delivered fresh
every day. Appetisingly delicious, wholesomely
Rood.
up
county derk'B office.
A" R. IHnJl 1 ....... .
jueuoe ai Jvminn,
III Mnn J.. .
hs ' ",,uy 00 . DUrinetti aim
manaRPr Kirm.of the Paciflfl
"lheourthouie.
John Overrreder. who h8 jt
aniahed hl potato harvest, was np
from thisuidaof Orenco, TueBday.
Hon. A. B. Flint, of Schnlle, was
in town Tuesday, and thinka that
the open wwon for automobiles U
over.
ruuut of Ibt
And bt wa
ARTHUR W. Pftru
ic.
". lf. I.r A.m-4.II
1'iwl
Tlw tlliu girl, ,)U , .
t't li. tmlhii-nJ iul,)nr ih-l-f.l
Ur btu.. cillwi wftl; tnd ant-
tuunljr.
Urm 1 aw.
clvarly.
A llttl fallow Ui, from ruutiii Ue
n,er of llu, ,,ii. bl i-j wM .ml
f'rftil. Ho twung bliiuitfir uu tiU
IS "ul wlilnui rwl UuarMir :
"Urr. tUry'rn going to ihoot Jlui
I'Hiluht. 1 Uiinl . u mi"
With t ijw rjr aim dn.Ml tba
truwi-l In K.r Uii aikl gruniMnJ ti,
Iln t ri(iiltt'a lmuUliT. "Bmiuf. wbrr
am tliejr the Iih1.
1 !)' r Ui tlie Hark
Imru." tU aiwHiT.
Wonl luid rumu iiiMnig tba mouutaln
l'lil 1 but tlw guit-rutnent wud
I11W m.Ii- among tbnu lu an attetupt to
illwturr mUdth tlK7 were tarrying oa
(b.-lr Illegal (lUlUIIng, and Mw bad
kuuwu for aiii tlui tbat Jaka Kin
uioaa, wUom aba and tli crliipla kuew
aa their fmbur. ca trying to direct
IU mu'U k,tt of lila frk-uda toward
tbo Ouu liMikliiK atranger kitowu aa Jim
KyiiMturi, wbu bad rvcvutlj coma aiuoof
tbeui.
Hjiiimia In lila rvudy, frU-iidly way
bad uiodi, frleuda wllb Uvr, and be
ofirti caina tu tb lllllo cablu to at-4
lirr. 8Ih lutil a ruiil bliu of bla dan
ger, l'ut bo bad careliiMty told btT but
ti worry. y
Now, aa aba a1l(d aoftly dutn tba
walk to ll abed, bar bcart tetUig
fat and bard, bvr ouly fear waa tbat
aba would not tw able to aara tba
broie, fearlvaa young fallow wbo bad
wou li.f beart. Hlw bird tba low
taittti-r of vol. m. and, kiiwllug cloa
ttlt txwrda of Ibe barn, aba llateued.
Kpiiuntm waa aH-nkliig . '
"I'liwi only una way to t") thla
ours fT all. If we don't muw of m
nru going to enil (be ret of our dayi
"Mi SIT, OMtHS HHiVUIBl WHAT IHlW THU
mhamt ua 0K1KU
lu a brKk cell. Tim tiling- to do la for
aoiuo ou- (o walk uo to bla window
ulxtut aupiMT 1 1 ine aud fin lab blui,
That a -did you Ix-nr any oolao tbeoT
All rlubt! Wv uiuat Oulatt bliu and
bavo It over with."
AnotbiT vole went oa: "It'a tba only
way. Ufa draw for tba mau."
Mary, gulvrlug with tba tenalon.
iiMtenod. "Ifa you. Kiiuioia,M tba
volco aald.
8ho atarted to leave, wheu auddeuly,
with a awlft tng, Ibe door waa llung
unn. Sh Und a dlay aenaatlon of
U'lug aoUod and ahnkeo hard. Tbea
thing ateadli-d. aud aba found hereebt
lutiklnti Into Euiiuona' cruel yea,
, "Oh, you would, woold jrouT ta
anarlcd. bla eya burulng luto bera.
"Vou would put that aiy aria to what
we're going to An to hlm WaU
wiifthcr you will or not!"
lila itrona- baoda aeeoMd to cruah
hir ik'Hb whrra be bold her. "You,
como with uier he ahapted at her.
He went Into tbe tannic, aud, oin-olng
a diMir Into her own room, ha threw
l-r In and alld the hcaty bolt. He
tunu'd to tbe little cripple, wbo atood
pvlnir tnm atoadlly from tbe dovrway
"Now. you U-ave that door alone or
I'll"- He utopped, hut tbe threat In
hi. tivra inmle the little follow quan,
Mar tRMird It where ahe hod fallen
In her room. Through her brain, craned
.ui. tin. thoucht of ber lorer tn
danger. Bounded tbe laat worda ahe
lind heard. They were planning to
eboot blui In the night, and aha waa
wiwurliiaa.
Night camo awlftly and allently. Bha
.t(vl near tho amall winaow ana ioow
ad out. There waa nothing to do aave
mark the houre as they paaeed nntU
Rmiimna should return with bla work
acoompllahed. Sammy, with hla deep
.irn.i nf Emmona. would not dare to
i...in lw.r nor. knowtna- tho price he
mimf nn. would ahe ask nltn.
Suddenly, when the dusk waa heaty
... - m awu..K
tin. h a. tne aouna at cuiuiou.
a to going
anawervd hurriedly
wern Jim."
iKiwo the broken path aha fled.
through the paature, awl turned np tba
narrow trail, boplng agalnat hope that
Kiiiniona would take tba long road to
Rymona' rahlo and tbat alw might
rrarb him la time. One fhe loat thu
(Ih. and fervrlably ah bunted until
aba found It. At laat ah rvarbrd th
alopa Blie the rrwk. where among
the tow bruah Br uw.na bad hla ahark.
Tba light waa hurtling; U looked pwe
rui. but wfl aba kww tbat aomewluira
hetweno her and tba light Kmtnona
waa erm-plng with bla rlB ready.
ur irH round tbe path. Bhe preeaM
00 aa rarefully aa aba could. dr.
mlnd to reach him In time to aara
him, Imt aa alia comnwiwed the climb
aba warrrinl. The atraln waa f.llln.
Huddonly ah aaw tlaat fare of a man
nbow for a moment In tbe yellow light
tie bo peerrd stealthily Into the win-
low of the ral.ln. The fare dUao-
!ttrd. Then a long, ahlnlng thine
a leveled. All her will power aha
forred Into her cry of warning, but It
tlrndd Into the Bound of the rifle aa
It guahed livid Ore through the night
Into the window.
TWa were a craaO of wood, the
Bound of epecdlnf feet, a aharn err
and-e1!enr. Mary ataggered to tba
door, eipectlng to are her lover writh
ing In the death agony, but aa aha
iH-ered It the door waa thrown ooan
wildly, and 4 strong face black with
powder and Bet In Una of battle beat
over bera aa ahe fell.
Mary! Orest beavena. what doea
thla UieanT be cried.
Jim, they were planning" Bba
paused a ahe aaw tho look of under-
atandlng lu bla eyes. Then suddenly
she ssw the stain on hla face. "Jim,
you're wounded."
He rubbed the powder from bla face.
No, but I ought to be. Tbat gun
went off full Is' my face. Coma," be
aald ahortly, "you and I must get out
of thla quk k! Mary, will you go with
in wherever 1 go, for good aud alir
lila face waa anxious and grave.
Her answer waa not la words, but it
vtutd aatlafsctory.
A little later they rode away swiftly.
At the pike Mary stopped ber hone
short "Jim. tbere'a Sammy. I told
blm I would come back for him."
'We will," waa Kymona' atmple,
quiet aoawer.
They bad ridden only a short dis
tance when sharply out of the dark
neaa a little figure acutUed. It waa
Sammy. "Mary, Maryl 1 knowed
you'd come. If a me."
Bymona niched down from tba aad-
dle aud gathered the frail little form
In bla aruia. Aa they rode on ahe told
him bow tba little fellow bad released
her that ahe might come to warn blm.
Wtivn she bad explained It in a few
tender words Sammy broke In:
"1 fixed bla gun too."
"Uow'a tbatr Bymona asked, atart
Ing at tbe statement, for be knew b
had looked squarely at a rifle musxle
and yet waa unhurt
"lie loaded hla gun whlla X waa
there and put It In a corner. I've load
ed guua aud kueW what to do. I took
tbe cartridge out wheu be wasn't in
the room and squeezed tbe bullet off
and put tbe cartridge back, and"
"Sammy-8yuKiua' arm went round
him tight "It was you wbo saved my
life."
Sam my anuggled close to him. "Ha
krene llcklug me, and 1 want to go
Where are you golugT" be suddenly
asked Interestedly.
Bymona laughed softly, a laugh of
happlneaa. "I'm going to take you and
Mary to a home where we can all be
happy together."
. Sammy sighed a long contented alga
aa If be felt tbat at laat ba waa on
hla way to peace.
Netlena About Sleep.
One of the rudest acta In the eyes of
a native of the Philippine lslanda la to
atep over a person aaleep oo tba floor.
Sleeping la with them a very solemn
matter. They are atrongly averaa to
waking any one. tbe Idea being tbat
during aleep the aoul la absent from
tba body and may not have time to re
turn If alu tuber Is auddenly broken.
If you call upon a native and arw told
ha la aaleep yon may aa well depart
. To get a acrvant to rouse you, you
must give him tbe strictest of orders.
Then at tbo time appointed ha will
ataud by your aide and call, "Senor,
eeuorr repeatedly, each time more
loudly tbau before, until you are half
twake. Then ha will return to the
low note and again raise bla voice
gradually until you art fully conscious.
Time ta Oo.
While at sen between Malaga and
Melllla rather an amusing Incident oc
curred which abowa ua- EogUehmen
"aa others see us." aaya a writer In
London Black and White. After din'
ner an orderly approached me unaaked
and produced a whisky and aoda. Aft
er a pause of ted mlnutea ha repeated
the performance. At the third repetl
tlon 1 remonstrated and at the earn
time asked what I owed him. "Noth
ing, aenor," he replied. "But we were
told you were an Englishman and
tbat we were to give you a wlaka
aoda' every ten mlnutea before you
went to bed, and we have to obey Or
kdera." 1 went to bed.
STRATEGY
m
GOOD
RESULTS
fut disappointed and said she was doe
at one of tbe station on the rosd the
it dsy snd thera wouldn't be an
other coach goto' for three day. Tba
paeaengefs waa all men. and tbey
poked their beada out o the winders,
atarlo' at the gal, but not one of 'em
offered to git outside and gie ber hla
eat Sha looked mighty eatooiabed
at thla. for abed been trarelln' In
eoacbee In the west and knew what
deference waa usually ahown to wo
men. "What'd tbe little gal do but climb
right up beside me. The expreaa agent
who waa superintend! ' tba loadlo' o
the boxes told ber she couldn't g ne
(bat coach. She aake1 why. and he
aald the coacb might b attacked by
road agents. ; She answered blm by
aayln' that tba road agents waa wel
come to all ahe bad. I tipped tba lead
era oo the ear, and we were off.
: "I waa a young man then, and I didn't
let slip a chance to aay soft things to
tbe little acbooltna'am. I told ber tbat
If we waa attacked ahe mustn't be
frightened for road agents wouldn't
hurt euca a tender little thing aa aha.
Hut I noticed aba anuggled pretty etoee
to me. We'd gone paat tbe second re
lay when auddenly, on makla' a tarn
ron ad aj bluff, a man atepped oot and
aald good aaturedly:
. " 'I'll take your Wells Fargo freight.
If you please.'
"-You'll find It In the boot,' 1 re
marked, pullln' In.
"The felter had no rifle, but 1 knew
that bla pala was coverln' me from
behind tbe bushes. Be weat to the
boot, nnatrapped tbe cover, and one by
one hla backers Joined blm and helped
blm off with tbe boxes. One o the
men come up front and aald he'd take
the mall bag If I didn't mind. I reach
ed under my sett, pulled It out and
dropiied It down to blm. -
"tioodnewa gracious,' exclaimed the
little acboolnia 'ani.'what a lonely place
for a post officer
our little Innocent! She never mis
trusted tbat aba was aittln' on a vol
cano. And I tlldn t want ner to. I told
ber the bag would be taken to a towa
off the road where tbe poatofflce waa
Iot a ted.
lty thla time tbe boxea waa un
loaded on toe grata beside the coach.
Tbe robbers waa tryln' to git off the
covers ly rlppln' 'em op with their bbj
knives when all of a audden there was
crackln' o" rifles from within the
Coacb. four road agenta toppled over,
one tried to crawl Into tbe buabea, and
three ran for tbeir Uvea. Tbe tittle
achoolma'am threw ber arms around
me and burled ber face In my whisk
era.
"Vou aee, tbe company bad aent the
Coach out for a decoy. A few daya be
fore they had let It leak out that on
that date they would send (50,000
worth o dust over the road. Of course
this waa reported to the band, wbo lay
In watt to relieve ua o the treasure.
Tbe boxea were filled with sand, and
In every aeat Inalde tbe coacb sat a
man with a concealed gun. They had
a leader, who watched till tbe agenta
got careleea, when be gave tbe word to
tire aud scooped tbe party,
"Well, I left tbe Utile school ma'am
wltb ber arma around my neck, and
waa in no hurry to unwind 'em. The
men in the coach got out. examined
the dead, took In tba only man left and
aigualed me to drive oo.
"'I., waa very much mortified
aald to the gal, 'at what appeared the
bad manners o' the men In tbe coacb
not makln' way for you when you got
on. but you aee, to have bad a woman
In tbat party would hare spoiled the
gaiueL Tbe expreaa agent knew what
waa a-goln' to happen and tried to
atop you goln' wltb ua, but when yon
climbed up bera so confident-like
hsdnX the heart to make you git down.
I'm glad you come, though.'
"'Whyr
"Well, t found it mighty nice to feel
your'
"Se bluabed red aa a rooster's comb
and fnoved aa far aa. ahe could get on
the other end o' tbe aeat
"I dropped ber off at her atatloa.
When I got back to Virginia City the
Wella Fargo superintendent asked me
why i consented to let a gal go on
auch an expedition. To throw the
road agenta off their guard.' 1 told
him. They'd never suspect danger
with a little chick Ilka tbat perched
on the box.' The Idea atruck him aU
o' a jhrap. and when the wounded rob
ber Mid tbat'a what finished 'em the
auperlntendent drew me a check fox
1 1.00 aa a reward for my forealght
"1 entered a quarter eectiou, bought
faroteVa Implementa with the money
and manirdthe acbooltna'am." -
intersteluOelTphone.
H
BOWSER
SNIPE
Starts. Early tn Morning on An
nual Quest For Birds.
NATIVES DENSELY IGNORANT.
After Fruitless Efforts Samuel Raaehae
Ham, Balievlng Ha la the Victim of
Plot Wife Trias ta Consols Him,
hut Ifa Ne Use.
M
.miiin ahe listened, one va m i
oft, low ahuffle of the little cripple's
crutches. There was a rattling at the
door. She waited In nervous - fear.
Slowly she hoard the Iron al Ids back,
ghe was free! ,
She swung back to the door and
gathered him In her arms. He gripped
her tightly. "My brave little Sadirayr
alio whispered.1 . .
lie answered bravely, yet trembling,
'He said he'd kill me, but I duet!"
In a few tuouieuia ber preparations
were made. She turned at the door,
and a sob gathered In her throat aa
she saw (the while Jit tie. figure watch
tug hor with silent appeal.- ''Mary,
tako uie," was all it said.
now jan It I. will fiowe back." (he
By SUMNER CHILDS.
(Copyright, 1901, by American Praia Asso
ciation.!
"A love story In my life?" said the
el-stage driver. "You bet. It hap-
on tne nuiB, iuv . uei-atage anver. -xou net, it nap-
footsteps grew heavy and passed ovtl on ,he ,Mt dr(tf4 , n)ade
on hla murderous errand. 8 tffl aa a dr,ve y,M Mweea Virginia City
Virginia pity
and Sacramento. At that time there
wtis frequent stage robberies o' the
Wells Fargo expresa treasure owln'
to the fact that aome. one connected
with the company waa passln' word
to the road agents wherever a large
amount o' gold dust waa to be chipped.
"Welt, one day a lot o" treasure boxea
waa hoisted aboard the stage and the
Inalde was full, o' passengers when
little school ma'am from New England
came a-trlppln' along from the tavern.
makln straight for us. When
tome Up I was on tbe box and told
ber the coach was full and she'd bet
ter take the next one. She looked aw
By M. QUAD.
(Copyright, 190. by AaaoeUtad Literary
rrasa.J
It. BOWSER abould have doe
credit iJluner had been fin
ished half an hour when he
auddenly aald to Mrs. Bowser;
"Tell tbe cook to put me on a little
aomethlng for breakfast I'll be up at
, and I'll want a bite before 1 go.
Neither of you need get np."
What la It you are going to doT
naked Mrs. Buwaer In astonishment
"Why,' I go on my annual anlpe bunt
tomorrow. 1 have been going for seven
years now. Tbe drug glut la going to
lead me hla abotgun."
"Are you going alone V
"Yea. I don't propose to take any
one along to scare tbe anlpe away. Tbe
anlpe la a wary bird, Mrs. Uewser. Be
must be trailed down with caution.1
"Yea, be tiiuet be very wary. You
have hunted Urn for aeven years and
haven't found blm yet Not a anlpe
have you ever brought home. You
brought home an old crow once, but
that waa your only game."
Yoa know what you are talking
bout do you 7" ba asked aa he flushed
up.' :
. "About snipe. "
Then let the ten you tbat I don't go
out to create a slaughter. I take a day
off; I get out Into the country 1 I am
aatlafied with killing a bird or two.
There baa never been a time that I
could not have brought home at least
counle of dosen bad I wanted to
make a butcher of myself.
Your sentiments do you credit Mr.
Bowser. The anlpe la an Innocent bird.
I
ELLO, 'central! Otva ma stars.
want long distance to tba stare.
That you. Marat Why. bowdidoT
Hows the weather uatng you?
Feeling pretty fit today? .-.
HqWb things In the Milky wart
Bow's tbe fishing? Bully I Final
Caught "a squldceoa weighing nine?
Ooat know what a aqutdgeoa is,
but It sounds Ilka At bla.
Bay, old man, from where you be, '
Blaring .right equare dowa on ma, -
Hew d'you think I'm looking, eh? -
Out ot alaUt? That'a bully! Say, . j
You're a humorist all light t
What's tbat? Tired? Out all night? '
Well, y lingo bss-has-bsittl 5
Wtra'e buatad-hav to quit I ' ' J
, Ratio, central t' Venus yea, " '
Vanua. V-a-n-u-sl
Howdy, Vanus-howdldo?
Wish 1 looked aa sweet aa youl '
Hew'a your mother? Oh, too bad!
Really? That la very-Bad. . -
Thought I'd ring to tell you that
I admired your new aprlng hat '
Tea, It'a quite becoming grand. ' -It
exactly what you planned?
Well, perbapa It's lust as welt
Ft you looked a bit more swell .
j lf the women on this sphere ' '
awon would dls of envy, dear. ;.,
Is It on straight? Well, not quite.
But tho tilt strlkea ma just right
Olvea you quite a piquant air
Wtth the mareelle of your hair.
Tell ma, does your new spring sack
Button up along the back,
Or Is It bas-bsa-bss-bsutl
Wire's buated again? Oh, tutl
1
i
t
i
Hello, contrail What's the bill?
Fourteen what? Not fourteen mill
Fourteen million dollars? My!
Wlre'a buated-eo am II "
-John Kendrlck Banga - In Harper sr
niwqr,. j
translation. ;
What do you suppose Jim meant.
when he aald that haughty ,Mlaa Prim
had a marceled smile r
"I suppose he meant her Hps were
curled." Baltimore American.
am was cp aid aw at at datliuht.
Why should any one seek to dabble In
hla blood 1 Just wade around In the
awampa all day and bring home one
snipe Just one. I want to aee If yoa
can tell one from a robin. Your break
fast shall be ready.'
Mr. Bowser sprang up to aay aome
thlng, but changed his mind. Why
ahould he lose his tempert Mrs. Bow
ser waa Jealous and envious because
ahe couldn't go, too, and It waa better
to treat her aa a child. T6 get real
mad on the evening before bla annual
hunt might disturb his aim on tbe mor
row. Therefore, like a wise man, he
dropped the subject and picked np hla
paper and went to reading. That night
he was restless and muttered In his
eleeo. Once Mrs. Bowser heard him
growl oot:
"Oh, I don't know a anlpe from a
robin, eh? We'll aee about thatr
Herwaa np and away at daylight to
catch Nth first auburbau car. He had
a double barreled shotgun and 100 car
tridges. He didn't. propose to be hem
med In by anlpe and run abort Of am
munition. On the car he looked the
real thing, and after working up hla
nerve a little the conductor made bold
to aay:
i xou are going aner em ror euro.'
r -wolves oc Dearer
? "Snipe."
"And 111 bet you get a wagon load.
Xou are Just the fellow to do It If
you get in a hole sell your life dearly.'
Nativea Had Never Seen 8nlpe.
. There was a young farmer on tbe
train who had come to town the night
before and gone on a boose. He was
now. better of It and going home, and,
bearing the conversation between Mr.
Bowser and tbe conductor, be atarted
off singing:
' "Oh, I want out to shoot the antpa
And make a dreadful alaughtert
' I killed five hundred and a crow.
Though aura I hadn't orter,"
At the end of the line Mr. Bowser
made his start, followed by a wave of
the band from the conductor. He had
gone about forty rods when he came
apon a farmer cleaning out. the road
side ditch and pleasantly asked:
"My friend, can you tell me the beat
place around here for anlpe T
"Whafa them r-queried the man aft
er, a minute.
"A anlpe is a bird." .
"He can't be an eaglet' , .
"No,".- -; .. . : ,
"Nor nwlhi ta&eyr ?k U
. ."No.. ;-. ;r '.v..
, "Then J, never aaw one. If I
yen I'd be -mighty careful how I
tied that gun.. 'You'd better leave It
hare and do your humin1 with a club."
Half a mile farther ,on. Mr. Bowse?
found a pond In a field. , It looked a
likely place for snipe, and he went
over. After he had circled the pond a
bird rose, and he banged. .. The bird
Ofch not fall, but a young man who
wa mending the cornfield fence- and
had not been noticed came sauntering
down to aay:: , . , .
"Want to kill some robins to eatr
"I fired at a snipe.",
"A anlpe? Why, man, there hasn't
been a ssispe around here In BOO yearal
TJiere'e Jb bird jou fired at sitting on
the fence, and If It ain't a robin men
I've gone blind."
"Then there are oo anlpe arooM
herer
Not a one. You come out to shoot
enlpe. did your"
I did."
"It'a too bad to disappoint you, but
If you'll come np to tbe bam I'll tot
you shoot at a calf for 10 cents a
shot. You may shoot all day long."
Some anlpe hunters would have be
come aiscourageo, dux air. oowavs
plodded along until be came upon a
fanner mowing the grass In his front
dooryard. ne stopped to aak about
anlpe, and the man came to the fence
to aay:
No; If he's passed this way I bavea g
sawn him."
"I asked yoa shout anlpe a bird.
corrected Mr. Bowser. ' '
"Snlpe-a bird? What doea It wok
llker
He's a email bird and good to oat"
Never beard of him. Bay, wife.
come out here."
Distresaad Family Didn't Knew.
Tbe fanner's wife came slowly oat,
followed by three children, ana the)
husband asked:
Mary, did you ever bear tell of
anlpe V
"Lor, nor ahe replied.
"You are sure you don't mean a
duck r. waa queried of Mr. Bowser.
"Can a anlpe be a duck Y Can a dock
be a g ii der? I said anlpe. A child four
years lit ought to know what a snipe
la."
Yea. I reck n so, but we are a dis
tressed family snd don't try to know
much. We have chllle and biles and
fevers and lota of other thlnga ana
taxes are raisin' all tbe time. Mebbe
they'll tell you at tbe next house. They
are Democrats there and dont nave
nothing but good luck. I'm goln' to
turn my coat thla fall."
Tbe next bouse was more than half
a mile owtanr, air. wowser rvwcoeu
to find a woman and a dog at the gate.
Theone aurveyed htm with suspicion
and the other with dlatrast.
"Madam." be aald, "I am oot from
town to hunt anlpe."
"Waal, hunt away." was ber bnfsqoe
reply. , .
"Are there any around herer"
"If there waa I'd pick 'enTTnyaelf.'
"lick 'em? How do you pV anlpe V
"Never you mind, but go. on about
your business or you'll get Into trouble.
We had a calf atoten laat night"
"But yon can't for one moment think
that I did ltr
"I've got my suspicions, and yon can
aee bow bad tbe dog wanta to get bolt
of you,"
"My dear woman"
But she started to open the gate, and
Mr. Bowser atarted off, headed for
town thla time. As he came: along to
here tbe "distressed family" dwelt
tbe farmer accosted him with:
"Say, stranger, my hired man says
he -knows what a anlpe la. He says
they are baldheaded on top ef the I
and have duck legs."
Aa tbe car waa reached there
the same conductor, and aa he took up
the fare he whispered:
"Left 'em In cold storage out la tba
country. 1 see. That's tbe way I al
ways do. Let tbe butcher tbat boy
'em go after 'em."
Well?" queried Mrs. Bowser at 5
In the afternoon aa Mr. Bowser walked
in, hot, tired and dusty.
"Not a word from you, woman not
a word: Some fiend In boman form
spent last ulgbt driving every aalpe
out ot the country, and I caq lay my
hand on the person who hired him to
do it to spite me!"
New Snort, .
Hired Man-Shooting at airships? '
Firmer Yep; trying to bring down
umpln' to trim M Ira ad y 'a hat Pack.
was
Father Mends the Furnace.
Father aald ha thought he'd Ax the fur
nace: ,
8aid It wouldn't take t.lm vary loosr:
Didn't know )ust what there waa the
matter: .
Only knew that there waa aomathing
, wrong;
Took his eoat off. then went dowa the
cellar, '
Bumped hla ships and made a dreadful
noise.
Mother said: "Run out and play, my daw
ling.
Father' a talk la not for little boye."
I aneaked out and by. the eoal ehute
listened
To the aounda that came up from he
low. Father awora and poked and puUed and
pounded:
Then ha Stopped awhile to puit aad
blow, ,
Pretty soon there was a dreadful clatter.
And then things down there got awful
still.
Ma let out a scream "Oh, what's the
matterr' . .
Then I heard u rruunlni nt to kill
retty soon pa, crawled up from the ceHar
Blacker than a pot. and whan he aooko
Badly of the cinders that he'd swallowed
I iuat laughed so much I thought I'd
choke.
Ma she patched him up and rubbed has
bruises,
, Bathed his face and made blm change
bis shirt
owing aha would rather have the fur
nace
Always out of fix than aee htm hurt.
Pa limped out and hurried to hla oflleav
Looking like he'd just been In a flaht.
When ha left he said be ovght to lick me.
ana ne may when ha gets home tonlgM.
Birmingham Ata-Hereld.
- Back to the Home Roost .
A, traveler lu Arkansas came to a
cabin and heard a terrifying series of
groans and yells. It sounded aa if
murder waa being committed. Ha
rushed in and found a gigantic negro
woman beating a .. wlaened little old
man with a club, while be cried for
mercy. . .
"Here, woman r' shouted the traveler.
"What do you mean fey beating that
man?'.'
"He's man husban'. an' HI beat blm
all I likes," ahe replied, giving the man
a few more cracks by way of empha
sis. ' . , " ' :(,'. ' i
"No matter if he is your huaband,
you' have no right to murder hlaa.":
"Go 'long, white man, and taf me
alnnn I'll nnnh host him soma BOOah."
"What baa he doner '
"Wha's he done? wny. una mn,
no 'count nigger done lef de door ef
my chicken house open, an' all mnk
chickens done gone but." '
, "Pahaw, thafs nothing! . They wlH
come back."
"Come back I No, sun, they'll go
back."-8aturday Evening Pas. .