THE SUDAY OKEGOXIAX, PORTLAND, OCTOBER 13, 1907.
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r Group of raw recruits. Urute3 5tates Army M i Wh- (SrsSUtf There are complaints of too tnuch -menial work-2 'uli ""A
I - ' -" --- . i-m in - '"H
Desertions Have
Increased to One Man in
Every Thirteen
and Conditions are
Growing- Worse
More Than Halt
the Desertions Occur in
the First Year of
Service, and
There is Abundant
Cause
BY JOHN ELFRE7TH V ATKINS.
THAT necessary evil of ours the
Army has run short of men. A
Jeremiad to this effect has just been
uttereil by the War Department, whose
powers that be will now put their heads
together over ways and means for re
storing the. glamor of the military life. ;
The growing discontent of our Army
must Inspire anxiety in all good citizens
who down In their hearts believe that the
lurest preservative of peace is certain pre
paredness for that relic of barbarism
yclept war.
This discontent has reduced our enlisted
force far below its authorized strength.
The fundamental principle of our military
organization is that the standing Army
must be ever available as the strong first
line of defense; that the stronger it Is
maintained the more time will be gained
In mustering our latent fighting force
the volunteers. We are indeed in a plight
when we are unable to fill the ranks of
this first line by far the smallest stand
ing army, proportionately, in the whole
!amlly of great world powers.
Thousands of Deserters.
Desertions have increased from 6.8 per
cent to 7.4 per cent in two years, and for
ihe decade before that the average was
but 4.5 per cent. Ijist year's list of deser
prs was no less (han men a number
Rieattr than those which have won some
of tin? great battles of the world. Here
would be a pretty list of guests at one of
1'ncle Sam's free hotels, if all were caught
and niven the long term of hard labor
which the law prescribes: and all would
have to be clothed and fed at the Nation's
expense. Over three-quarters of three de-j-crters
were men serving their first en
listment, and over one-half were serving
their first year. Another Index to this dis
content is that only one out of three men
who serve their terms are re-enlisting.
Stilting this In another way, two out of
every three enlistments are by "green
horns," more than a half of whom are de
serting before the first of their three years
has been served, anil it takes the whole of
thUi first year to "break in" a recruK.
Bd raw material is coming to our re
rrultlng officers, moreover. Three out of
every four men presenting themselves for
service are found not to have the neces
sary moral character, temperate habits,
good physiiiue and ability to read, write
and speak Knglish.
Shortage Kvcn of Officers.
Hut. most ominous of all, officers, too,
are not to be had. There are now 96
vacancies In the entrance grade of Sec
ond Lieutenants, and only 13 enlisted men
have come this month for final examina
tions to fill these. Kven should all of
these pass. S3 pairs of shoulder straps
must be given to civilians. Army life
has Indeed lost its old-time glamor when
men in the ranks are not even tempted
oy tne cnance to enter the gilded aris
tocracy of officers' row and to do unto
others as they have been done by.
But the cause of the soldiers' growing
oiseonieniT v nue tne conservative pow
ers that be have been prating about the
"heinous crime of desertion, the neces
sity for turning the secret service bureau
loose on deserters, and the increase of
punishment for the offense, the more pro
gressive have gone In for heart-to-heart
talks with the man behind the gun. and
have sought his grievances. They have
found the chief causes of his discontent
to be
Poor pay.
Insufficient rations.
I-ck of canteen.
Misfit uniforms.
I ack of home surroundings.
Menial duties.
Tyranny of superiors.
Paid Less Than Lowest Labor.
The worst crumb in the bed Is his
pay. General Fred Funston In his last
report says that the United States sol
dier Is the most poorly paid man In
any occupation In the country today,
and recommends a 60 per cent increase.
An enterprising officer of 20 years' ex
perience called lately at Commissioner
NelU'i bureau of labor and discovered
that the captor of little George Washing
ton. Agulnaldo was correct. He discovered
that the lowest paid adult civilian la
borer in the United States Is the plan
tation negro of Louisiana cane fields,
who averages $1 a day. The Yankee
soldier gets 43 1-3 cents a day in flat
pay. Add to this his clothing allow
ance of 18 cunts a day and you have
6 1-3 cents, as compared with the dol-
ar received by the image of His Maker
In ebony, who works In the cane fields.
But the plantation negro not only has
houses, but gardens, thrown in, and
needs but little clothing, and he has
every Sunday and nearly every Satur
day afternoon, whereas the soldier
must always be decently attired, even
if he has to buy extra clothing out
of his own money as is usual and he
must be on duty every night and day
of the week, and is always subject to
duty that may cost him his life. In
surance companies, recognizing his
greater risk, charge him extra prem
iums. True, the Government retires its sol
diers on three-fourths pay after 30
years, but the percentage who avail
themselves of this and the benefit is
so small and so distant that it docs
not figure,- says this enterprising of
ficer. True, too, that the soldier gets
free medical attention and a free fu--neral
with a cemetery lot and grave
marker thrown In, but our more en
terprising industrial corporations are
not only giving their employes free
medical attention and pensions, but
free educational advantages for their
children, comfortable living, quarters
and reduced hours of labor.
The civilian laborer can go on strike
and demand a redress of his grievances.
but the soldier who strikes necessarily
receives a long term In prison for his
trouble. The private soldier's present
pay of $13 a month was established
nearly 40 years ago. since when the
cost of living has nearly doubled. Many
skilled mechanics in civilian life now
receive as much pay as a Captain in
the United States Army, and day la
borers are receiving four times as much
as the private soldier.
Sometimes No Pay at All.
The soldier sometimes gets no pay
at all because indebted to the United
States for extra clothing. The pay
roll at Fort Myer, opposite Washing
ton, discloses that in a recent month
1S3 men out of a single regiment were
in this very predicament. The regular
clothing appropriation does not appear
to meet the actual necessities of the
soldier who wishes to be decently
dressed.
This clothing grievance concerns
quantity not so much as quality, In
the light that the man behind the gun
sees it. One ex-soldier describes the
soldier's uniforms as so ill-fitting that
the new recruit feels ridiculous when
he appears in public "Small wonder,"
says he, "that the man in uniform
should be unwelcome in many places.
About one in ten looks like he might
have once been a gentleman. Com
pared with the recruit in his new uni
form the ordinary coachman is an aris
tocrat." The Inspector-General takes
much tho same view in his report of
this month, and urges that the soldier
be allowed a uniform with a style that
is pleasing. "Discrimination against
the soldier's uniform at theaters and
public places." says he. "may be les
sened if we keep his working clothes
more in the background. "Prejudice
might be disarmed if he wore the dress
instead of the service uniform. And It
is possible that sometimes -we carry
too far the prohibition or civilian
clothes.
Canteen a Big Factor.
But of all grudges which the discon
tented man of the barracks holds against
Uncle Sam is the substitution of the rum
brothel for the canteen, or what has
amounted to the same. The canteen.
regimental institution, subject to regula
tion, was a branch of the commissary.
"where a soldier could buy a social glass
of beer and forget that he was a slave.
as one veteran puts it. No liquors were
sold there, and the profits of the beer
consumed went into the regimental can
teen found and were spent in good things
to eat. If a soldier drank too much beer
in the canteen, a word from his Captain
shut off his supply. But once upon a
time a powerful society of women ush
ered up Capitol Hill a truck bearing a
"polyglot petition," which caused the
leaders in Congress to break out into
goose-flesh, and in sheer fright to pass
a law abolishing the canteen. The net re
sult has been that the -bibulous soldier,
after a few days' conservation of thirst,
hikes out for the place of the "bootleg
ger" convenient to each army post, and
spends his nickel on fusel oil and prune
Juice. He staggers back to the post with
a generous bottled supply for the boys
In the barracks, and the Increase of
drunkenness in the army has 'been annu
ally accelerated ever since the new "re
form" was instituted. But this is such
a delicate question with the soldier man
that polite language cannot do justice to
the picturesqueness. Of his argument of
the case and for full justice to his elo
quence the country must await the
American Kipling" now sought by a
popular magazine.
Tyranny of officers, especially of sub-
Brealun- in raw recruits. United States Army
alterns. is another source of grievance.
"The attitude of the Southerner toward
the negro seems the only perfect compari
son with the officers' attitude toward the
soldier." says one man who has done
time under the flag. The Inspector-General
has also found some grievances laid
to the door of the "tyrannical Sergeants."
During the long practice march of the
First Battalion, Thirteenth Cavalry, from
Fort Riley to Fort Sheridan, from July
27 to September 6, many men deserted in
resentment of the severe punishment dealt
out to them by the troop commander. "I
was fined $50 because I rode on a train
when I was supposed to be walking be
hind the troops. There were five of us.
and now none of us will receive a cent of
pay for four months That is the whole
trouble with the Army. They pay a man
$13 a month, and then the officers fine the
men until .they haven't got a cent com
ing," complained one veteran of this six
weeks' march.
Too much early rising Is another com
plaint frequently heard. "Why should we
all be turned out at 5:80 A. M.? What's
the sense, anyhow?" asked one man in
the offflciai olive drab.
Perhaps Dr. Stiles "lazy bug" was eat
ing into this chap's vitals, but some
psychologist or other, who lately compiled
statistics of insanity, found that insanity
was greater among farmers than any
other class of citizens, and attributed the
cause to too early rising. Even the offi
cers In the recent six weeks' "practice
march" from Fort Riley to Fort Sheri
dan objected strenuously to the early
hour at which they were yanked out of
slumberland. "In all my experience I
never heard of a commanding officer
making his men get up at 4 o'clock in
the morning, as we have done on this
march," said one captain. Another com
plaint has been made over the rule re
quiring tired men to report at the final
roll call at 10 o'clock each night instead
of allowing them to "go to their blan
kets in peace" as soon as they wish after
the duties of a hard day are done.
There are complaints, also, of too much
menial work of too often having to give
up the musket for the rake, the spade or
the pickax.. In truth, there are com
plaints too many for bare mention in the
space of this dissertation. And, besides,
if the gentle reader hears too much of
their tale of woe his sympathy for our
khaki boys will be blunted rather than
sharpened.
And, besides, more than enough will be
heard when Congress sits again, for. there
is to be a "to do" then under the big
whfte dome over the best ways and means
of making the soldier's life more attrac
tive. Washington, D. C, September 27.
SIXTY DAYS WITH AN AUTO
By a Portland Man Who Thinks He Hae Average Intelli
gence, Nerve and Coolness, 'Together With Tabloid Advice
THIS experience is given for a warn
ing to beginners in handling an
auto. In the short time of 60 days
I have arrived at a fixed, definite conclu
sion that the auto is a wonder. It is cer
tainly loaded, and most wonderfully con
structed, with double ball bearings, with
back and forward action, it can with per
fect ease, and without the least effort,
turn a back, side or end somersault,- with
or without grip, slides In or out, side- I
wise, without the least warning or rea
son given, and In mud can literally plow
Its way to the bed-rock. No question, the
auto is a wonderful, living, breathing,
seemingly thinking machine; has a mind
and will of its very own.( I am in doubt
if I will be ever fully able to master one.
You see, it takes time for an operator to
connect himself up by wiring his desires
to his hands and feet all at once. You
know what to do, but you cannot holler
whoa! or Jerk the lines, but you must
think fast and act still faster, or you
have busted something more than a tele
graph pole.
I am now of the opinion, after 60 days'
experience, that I own a bucking Cayuse
whose tail and heels are everlastingly
over the dashboard, but I don't feel like
giving It up, for I see so many just (or
I think so) as big a fool as I am, and
they are still living, having both eyes,
arms and legs securely attached, and
some have run autos two and three
years. This gives me courage to con
tinue to try to master this truly most
wonderful and extraordinary novel mode
of riding.
I will now give you a part of my ex
perience of narrow escapes from acci
dents. This is for the new beginner; old
ones know all about It. but won't tell.
First Accidents: I was crossing Burn
side bridge after 10 dsys ownership; a
delivery wagon stopped on the east ap
proach of the bridge as I attempted to
go round his rig. Damage: Mashed "both
lamps, one worse than the other. Ex
pense: Battered lamp, lights smashed.
$12.30; confidence and some nerve shaken.
Second Wheels skidded on Second
street, nearly knocqed out a truck loaded
with three tons of freight. Damage:
Slight crumpling in wheel fender; ex
pense, more confidence lost.
Third Plate" glass wreckage: Arrived in
front of a store, set brake, rammed home
the speed lever to make more secure;
auto advanced with brake on, sufficient
to jam a small buggy, breaking reach;
expense $4. I immediately pulled back
speed lever, setting it on back gear; spark
went out. I then cranked machine, which
at once started. Auto commenced back
ing. Attempted to stop backing by using
my knee against front wheel, , but the
auto continued, carrying me backward
over curb and sidewalk, and a plate glass
window and brick building saved my
limb from further damage. At once got
the machine off sidewalk; owner not in;
told the. lady to have window fixed, to
get extra quality and thickness of plate
glass, as I Intended to travel on that
street again. Insurance fixed in plate. I
now travel only where insurance compa
nies are liable. No question, every plate
glass window in city should be Insured.
None are safe. Insurance companies
should do a rushing business. Lightning
rods are not in it.
Fourth Turning corner, man ran di
rectly in front of auto. Only chance I
had in saving the walking Idiot was to
take the sidewalk, which I did. Ran the
machine full length on sidewalk. Scared
three years growth out of a man walk
ing. Stopped some three feet from vic
tim. He asked, in a very excited voice,
what in h I was after him for. I mildly,
for I was not the least llt excited, as if
It were an every-day occurrence, ex
plained that It was either the fellow on
the street or he; was in doubt f-r a
while whom I would mangle or kill, and
I took chances on stopping the flying ma
chine before-1 reached him. You see,
my friends, my judgment was correct,
you are safe. A bystander complimented
me by stating, "Finely done. It was a feat
of great merit performed; no one hurt,
but death seemed Inevitable for a moment
for both men."
I felt better after the words of praise,
but my nerves and confidence were more
than shaken. I immediately pulled the
machine otf the sidewalk and started for
the garage to tell my troubles, and have
my auto tightened up; It was - running
altogether too loose. Traveled six blocks
and went dead. I cranked and continued
cranking, not a spark or a hope of one.
At this critical time, with beads of per
spiration standing on my face, an angel
appeared In the form of an undersized
chauffeur comfortably seated In his auto.
He exclaimed, "Say, sir, see about your
tank gasolene." I did. Not a drop. It
was empty. The drugstore supplied two
gallons and I moved on to the garage.
Fifth Crossing Madison-Street Bridge I
pased a team going east, bridge wet; all
of a sudden my nigh front wheel struck
a rail, hind wheels slid, reversing my
auto, facing it west; then, before I re
alized what was wanted of me the auto
concluded to take a bath and mounted
the bridge rail fender, striking my al
ready damaged lamp against the irons
that hold up the bridge; spark went out,
hence the auto ' stopped. Damages:
Sprained left hand, new lamp, $12.50, and
more confidence lost. I was careful, was
going slow, but blamed If I understand
slippery roads, or why the infernal auto
balked; I was going for business, not
pleasure, and for the dumb brute to
make such a quick turn was beyond my
experience and present knowledge.
A Few Things to Memorize.
1. Forever keep a firm grip on the
steering gear.
2. Forever keep one eye on the road.
When both are full of gnats or dust, stop.
8. -Forever keep your mind centered on
the auto; this you .certainly ought to do.
4. Don't talk. Never have your best
girl on the front seat when the auto is in
motion. Temptation too great.
5. Don't ever think you are entirely safe
from danger; you are not.
6. Don't try to break time records turn
ing corners; even if roads are dry, you
might skid into a different climate and
certainly will if the weather is wet.
7. Never travel faster than eight miles
an hour. If you cannot see through the
darkness and dust as far as 33 feet.
In conclusion. Good news. Don't get
discouraged. I am working on a muffler;
cannot understand why each auto is not
provided with one. After a man has been
lying on his back under the auto an hour
and 37 minutes with a kit of tools he
knows little or nothing about, and crawls
out with mud clinging to his clothes and
hanging to his eyebrows, knuckles blue
and bleeding, he should, have a muffler
' to whisper In. Profanity is an awful
thing to sow broadcast. Of course, the
occupants of the auto are casehardened
before he crawls out. You see the muf
fler is intended to protect the young
farmer boys and girls standing round ab
sorbing knowledge. Let a machine stop
or break, in no time all the country turns
out, as wireless telegraphy must certainly
be used.
Paste, securely, the above, for ready
reference in your book of instructions.
You may have occasion to read them over
before help arrives, bringing possibly,
tube, tire, gasolene or a brand new wheel.
JIM.
P. S. I Intend to remain In the game.
Fortunes Lost at Cards
Gamblers Who Have Won Thousands at a Single Winning.
The young American millionaire who Is
reported to have lost $500,000 at poker
within 24 hours may derive what satis
faction he can from the knowledge that,
in the history of gambling,, few men have
ever squandered so much money in so
short a time.
Colonel Mellish, one of the greatest
plungers of last century, is perhaps his
nearest rival; for is said that he was
known to have won 100,000 at a single
sitting and to have lost it all at the next;
while the climax of his gambling mad
ness was reached when he staked
40.000 upon a single throw of the dice,
and lost.
Colonel Mellish, whose boast It was
that he never opened his mouth in the
betting ring under 500. inherited during
his minority one of the largest fortunes
in England; but so prodigal -and reck
less was he that within a few years he
had nothing left out of his vast estates
but one small farm. Hod sack Priory, to
which he retired, and on which he died,
a broken man, at the early age of 37.
At his ancestral seat of Blythe is still
preserved a card table at which he lost
40.000 at one slttlr to the Prince Re
gent For more than 50 years George Payne
spent more nights at ie card table than
any man who ever cut a pack. During
one almost continuous sitting of X hours
be lost 80,000. and within a week ue had
won every penny of it back. On another
occasion he and Lord Albert TJenlson sat
up all night at Limmer's Hotel, and only
separated In the morning when Lord Al
bert, who had lost 30,000, and was due at
the altar of St. George's, Hanover Square,
where bis bride was awaiting him; while,
it Is said, the same pair once set out to
gether in a coach to the New Forest and
played cards all day and far into the
night with 100 staked on each game.
Those were indeed days of high play
when at Almack's, as Walpole says,
"the young men of the age lose 10,000,
15,000 and 20,000 in an evening." The
play at this famous club was only for
roleaux of 50 each, and generally there
was at least 10,000 on the table. "The
gamesters," to quote C- W. Heckethorn,
"began by pulling off their embroidered
clothes, and put on frieze garments, or
turned their coats Inside out for luck.
They put on pieces of leather to save
their lace ruffles, and to guard their
eyes from the light, and to prevent tumb
ling their hair wore high-crown hats
with broad brims, and sometimes masks
to conceal their emotions."
Walpole tells a remarkable story of
Mr. O'Blrne. an Irlsu gamester, who had
won 100,000 from a young Mr. Harvey,
of Crigwell, who had just come into a
large estate on his elder brother's death.
"You can never pay me," O'Blrne said.
"I can," said the youth; "my estate will
sell for the debt." "No," said O'Blrne,
"I will win 10,000; you shall throw for
the odd 90,000." They threw, and Har
vey won.
At White's Oeneral Scott, a cautious
player, won $1,000,000 at cards, and out
of his winnings was able to dower his
daughter Joanna with 100,000 when
she married George Canning. Such an
inveterate gambler, too, was Lord Sand
wich that when he went once or twlce a
week to hunt with the Duke of Cumber
land he carried a 1 ox of dice in his
pocket: "and so they threw a main
whenever the hounds were at fault, upon
every green hill and under every green
tree."
Lord Granville, who died 60 years ago,
was one of the four noblemen who lost
100,000 in one night of card playing at
Crockford's infamous club. Jack Mytton,
the "Squire of Halstead," who declared
that "he wouldn't give a straw for life
on 6000 a year." squandered 500.0110
over cards, and ended his days in the
King's Bench Prison; Sir John Bland lost
32,000 in a few hours in a London gam
bling club, and Lord Thanet's card
losses are said to have averaged about
50,000 a year for many years, while
Ernest Benzon lost 30,000 at cards in one
night at GooHwood and 10,000 in 10
minutes at chemln-de-fer.
Of the gambling Lord Granville it is
told that one afternoon he' ordered his
carriage at Graham's, Intending to start
at once for Paris. When the carriage
came round, however, he was deep in a
game of whist and ordered the carriage
to wait for an hour or two. Six hours
passed, then another six, and another,
the horses being changed at the end of
each: and only after he had sat contin
uously for 24 hours did the Ambassador
leave the table to start his journey
10,000 poomr for his delay.
And as fifr back as the records of card
playing go, the story is always the same.
In 1667-8 Pepys wrote: "I was told to
night that my Lady Castlemalne is so
great a gamester as to have won 15,000
one night and lost 25,000 In another
night at play, and has played 1000 and
1500 at a cast." The niece of Cardinal
Mazarin won 1400 guineas at basset off
Nell Gwynne at a sitting, and 8000 from
the Duchess of Portsmouth, "In doing
which she exerted her utmost cunning,
and had the greatest satisfaction, be
cause they were rivals In the royal
favor." .
"Lord Lauderdale,"- says Crocker, "in
formed me that Mr. Fox told him that
the deepest play he had ever known was
about this period (1772). Lord Lauder
dale instanced 5000 being staked on a
single card at faro, and he talked of
70,0i)0 lost and won In a night." While
a few years earlier (In 1708) the Duchesse
de Berry actually rose 1,800,000 llvre
poorer from the card table. Tit-Bits
Never.
Milwaukee Sentinel.
I have sailed the seas from north to south;
And I've "shivered my tarry lights";
And I've reefed the bowsprit when the wind
Was blowing a thousand frights.
I have scraped the runnels all clean and
bright
A Job that 1 didn't Ilk").
But blow me if ever I've seen a man
"Laid low with a marllnsplke."
I've been in the "neat" when the night war
pitch
And the devil wa In the seas.
And 1 thanked my stars to think that 1
Was safe from the failing trees.
I have seen the air turn a liquid blue
When a sailor was slow to hike.
But blow me if ever I've seen a man
"Laid low with a marllnsplke."
I have boxed the capstan and scrubbed the
screw. And 1 know how to tell the time
By the starboard watch I'm a stoker, too,
And I stoke in a way sublime.
I can "blast my timbers" and give a hitch.
In storm or in calm alike.
But blow me if ever I've seen a man
"Laid low with a marllnsplke."