THE SUNDAY OREGONIAN, PORTLAND, SEPTEMBER 15,' 1907.
ciflc. It Is not contended that the
Coast cities could ' not protect them
selves from naval attack; but it is clear
that to do so against a Hawaii in hos
tile hands would cost a sum enormous
ly greater than that required to make
these Islands impregnable.
"Economy demands that American
possessions here be made absolutely
secure. That condition having been
reached, nothing extraordinary in the
way of defenses or garrisons would be
required in California, Oregon and
Washington. So long as Hawaii re
mains unfortified or fortified inade
quately, Japan will feel that war with
the United States Is within the sphere
of practical politics
"Possessing this base and protected
It she could not do much on this slda
of the ocean and probably would not
venture here except with her commerce
destroyers. It should be remembered
that in the war with Russia the Jap
anese navy refused to give battle far
from its base, though they might hava
taken Rojestvcnsky unawares in
Madagascar waters or in the Straits
of Malacca. - s
"A beginning has been made toward
fortifying Honolulu and Pearl Harbor,
but what the Advertiser wants to press
upon the notice of its visitors is th
fact that the entire programme, when
completed, will not prevent the landing
of hostile forces, efficiently convoyed,
on the otner side of the island. Bat
teries of heavy guns are nearly aa
requisite there as here, and there
ought to be provision for a large gar
rison. Malta is the example; we should
emulate that."
Y. W. C.. A. CONFERENCE AT SEASIDE COMES TO END
Gathering Looked Upon As Interesting and Profitable In History of Organization Delegates Thoroughly Enjoyed Every Session
here by floating mines, mortars, siege
guns such as she could easily trans
port and mount Japan could make
herself a dangerous enemy. Without
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BELLING HAM,
THE conference of the 'Young
Women's Christian Association of
the Pacific Northwest, which has
been In session at Seaside since August
81. closed 8unday. Large delegations
from the associations of Oreson, Wash
ington, Idaho and Montana have been
present. In addition to the girls rep
resenting a number of strong college
associations. During the sessions ot
the conference the girls have had
splendid opportunities for recreation
and have enjoyed themselves im
mensely. Beginning at 9 o'clock the morning
each hour of every day has been filled,
either with a talk from some secretary
who has had long experience in the
work, or with a dip in the surf, or a
drive In the afternoon, made pleaBant
by the cool breeze from the ocean, or
with the vesper service. Meetings
have been held every night, the time
usually being taken up by the presi-
- ' gft rSl '
muuse . 5EA?PE.
ORE.
local association have met by them
selves to have a heart to heart talk
about all the happonlngs of the day.
Among those in attendance at the
conference have been Miss Helen S.
Barne and Miss Mary F. Dunne, Na
tional secretaries"; Miss Mary McLean,
of Adelphi College, In New York, and
instructor In sonloloe-V! Tir Trnnlr nf
aent or secretary of some flourishing I Oakland, Cal.; Dr. Laflammo, of In
association. After this, Just before the dia; Miss Francis Gage, state secretary
retiring hour, the delegates of each l of Oregon; Mrs. Walter J. Honeyman,
staie president of Oregon; Mrs. Lola G.
Baldwin, secretary of the Travelers'
Aid department of the Portland Asso
ciation; Miss Constance McCorkle, sec
retary of the Portland Y. W. C. A.; Mrs.
H. D. Campbell, Miss Helen Hutchin
son, of the local association; Mrs. Best
Johnstone, extension secretary of the
Seattle association; Mrs. Frank Black,
of Seattle; Mrs. Wood, president of
the Seattle association; Miss Dunne
Yest and Miss Delta Watson, who ren
dered excellent service as the business
secretary of the conference.
The local association has been mak
ing an earnest endeavor to Interest
other associations in the Travelers'
Aid work for girls, Portland being far
ahead of other cities in this branch.
Mrs. Baldwin spoke several times dur
ing her stay at Seaside, telling of the
work here.
Mlss( McLean, of Adelphi College, who
is malclng a tour of the United States
fc-wSE.M e. Hl&K SCHOOL
: PELECATION
A. MAPPOCX
'n ordir to leard of the Industrial con
ditions among girls, spoke each day
leuing or the results of her Investiga
tions among the working girls of other
cities. Her addresses gave those pres
ent at. the conference a much clearer
Insight Into economic conditions sur
rounding girls, and the facts brought
to light will go ,far toward helping
to strengthen the Y. W. C. A. work
both in Portland and other CoaBt cities.
The women and girls who have been
In attendance at the conference have gone
in attendance at the conference will go
to their home associations feeling that
they have gained largely, both in
knowledge and In health and that the Y.
W. C. A. of the Pacific Northwest will
take a step higher and extend the arm
of its influence a little farther, that
It may help the young woman in need
at the opportune moment.
REDUDTION IN WEIGHT CERTAIN
A Beauty Shop Where Women Can Get Thin "Stout Ladles Taken Down" Is Its Sign.
ON a side street In London there is
a house bearing the sign "Stout
ladies taken down," and within the
little house there is the equipment for
the most complete thinning cure in
the world.
Many of the processes tljrough
which the patients are put are kept
secret,- but others have either leaked
out or been told by those who have
visited the establishment for treat
ment. The English woman who pre
sides over the places declares, among
other thongs:
That all women who are too. fat can
be reduced.
That it makes no difference whether
one reduces in Summer or Winter, ail
seasons are alike to the woman who
wants to get rid of excess of weight.
That women are more easily reduced
than men.
That a woman gains 25 per cent In
attractiveness by losing 1) pounds of
weight provided she is beyond
normal.
When a woman enters this 'place she
prepares to leave her flesh behind.
First she steps upon the scales and is
made to put down In a book her ex
act weight.
It is sometimes difficult to get a
voman to weigh herself, for the rea
son that stout' women do not want to
know what they weigh. But. once
upon the scales and having recorded
her weight in a book with her own
hand, it is easy afterward to get a
woman to weigh herself. The secret is
out, and she is proud of each pound
lost. ,
Many lectures ar given to women on
how to lose flesh, and there are mental
suggestions as well as physical pro
cesses. In a booklet which Is handed
to patrons in the reduction establish
ments there are these bits of advice:
Think you are losing weight, and
you will lose. Think yourself into get
ting thin. Don't fret, but Just expect
that you wHl lose weight.
Don't weigh yourself right after din
ner nor right after you have taken a
big drink of water. A pint weighs a
pound, and many a woman has fretted
over added weight when it was only a
glass of water that made her heavier.
Weigh yourself at least three times
a day, preferably before each meal, and
keep tally of your weight from day to
day. Weighing is of the utmost Im
portance to the woman who wants to
know if she is getting thinner. ,
Then be careful of your diet. There
are people who assert that it Is im
possible to get rid of fat and that once
fat is to be always fat unless some
illness intervenes. But this is a mis
take. The person who is too, fat will gen
erally begin by dieting. This is all
right if one knows how to diet. But
the woman who simply cuts down her
food supply will lose her health. Here
are the diet hints:
Eat all you want once a' day; the
middle of the day Is the best time.
Don't eat very much in the evening
and nothing at all before you go to bed.
Let your breakfast be light, and don't
forget that the stomach has its likes
and dislikes. Eat little, but eat well.
It is along the lines of exercise that
the beauty shop does its best work. It
tells you how to exercise and what exer
cises will take oft your pounds. Each
patient requires a different set, and it
is one of the duties of the little estab
lishment to adapt the exercise to the
person.
In the case of a woman who was
large around the waist line there were
the bending movements. Thy were all
performed with the muscles of the
hipu. They were four in number.
The first exercise was the hip exer
cise. To perform it you stand squarely
upon both feet. Then you lift one foot
and kick out violently at the side.
The second exercise is the abdominal
exercise.' and it ia good for the man
with increasing girth as well as for the
woman. It Is the bending exercise.
Placo both hands upon your hips
with your fingers pointings front. Bend
backward and forward. Keep swaying
and swaying until you are tfred, which
should be in about five sways.
The third exercise is the rowboat exercise.-
Seat yourself and grasp the
arms of your chair. Throw yourself
backward as though you were rowing;
then forward, going through with the
rowing exercise until 'you feel as If
you had rowed far enough.
Then take the fourth exercise to rest
yourself. This exercise is for the arms.
Take a step forward and throw your
arms behind you as you step. At the
samo time breathe deeply.
Repeat stepping forward, throwing
back your arms and breathing deeply,
until you feel as though your muscles
were all alive.. Then stop and rest.
To bring down the neck of a woman
who Is too stout takes both courage
and persistence. But the woman who
wants to wear her necklace will not
lack either of these.
She will beat her neck with sea salt
and water; she will stretch It until
the fat begins to disappear; she will
pound It and pinch it and keep at It
until its flesh fades.
The attention of polite' London was
called anew, to the little thinning shop
early in the season when one of the
court ' ladies began to get stout. In
her case the cheeks were to be thinned.
"Your face begins to look piglike."
said the attendant at the beauty shop
with more frankness than- policy, "and
you have no expression at all In your
eyes, which are sunken behind the
mountains of fat.
"Then, too, your color is too high. A
florid color makes 'a woman look old
before her time. A young girl or a
very young matron can have rosy
checks, but never the woman who has
mounted into the forties.
"Then your fat lias grown up high
at the side of your face. It makes your
face look pumpkinlike.
"You have high, fat cheekbones, and
you do not seem to know how to do
up your hair. Everything has combined
to make you look fat and old."
The lady gasped. But there was
nothing to do but listen, for she had
paid her money to hear the truth, and
she wanted it in large, full doses.
The woman who advertised "stout
ladies taken down"' kept on with the
taking down process until she had re
duced her patient to a proper frame of
mind. Then she began to reduce her
physically. She took a pound of flesh
off each cheek and left the lady pretty
and vivacious once more. It is Impos
sible to be vivacious if you are too fat
in the face. '
"Penn" In Philadelphia Bulletin.
It la amusing in England to note the
odd notions which often exist there about
the United States and things American,
on the part of ordinary Englishmen. I
once had occasion to go into a Holborn
publishing house, especially engaged In
the sale of text-books for schools. I ex
plained that one ot the principal pur
poses of my call was to purchase one or
two books that would give an idea of the
sort of Interpretation which is put upon
the events of the American revolution,
as taught' to English youth. Courteous
attention was exchanged in the endeavors
of the manager of the house to get me
what I wanted In his stock or to send
for It elsewhere. "But," said a young
man, an apparently well-educated clerk,
who looked over the catalogue for the
text-books In vain to discover one which
gave anything like a full account of the
revolution, ' "I must say, sir, that when I
went to school we boys were taught very
little about it. Your American boys, sir,
must know more in a day about English
history than ours do about American his
tory in a year. I can see this from the
kind of American text-books we some
times get here." It is, therefore, not sur
prising that most Englishmen grow up
into manhood with queer Ideas about the
size and geography of the United States,
the difference, for example, between Mas
sachusetts and Pennsylvania, what New
England Is, the location of the Indians,
what caused the revolution, the difference
between a President and a Governor and
other such themes of elementary import.
I have known not a few American boys
and girls who could reel off a list of all
the Kings and Queens of England from
the time of William the Conqueror to
Edward VII almost without stopping to
take breath, but an English youth has
usually no knowledge at all of American
rulers save that he has read something
about Washington, has a misty idea of
Lincoln as an emancipator and has heard
Just enough about Roosevelt in the news
papers to be in some doubt as to whether
he was an enterprising college professor
or a reformed cowboy.
It Is still not uncommon to run across
Englishmen who have a idea that New
York is the capital of the United States,
that Pennsylvania is chiefly peopled by
Quakers, that Indiana is the state which
is given over to the Indians, that Chi
cago is on the Mississippi River, that
Abraham Lincoln was the great soldier
or General of the Civil War, that Phila
delphia is Bomewhere down in the South
ern country, that the American business
man usually goes about with a revolver
or . a bowle knife, and that Englishmen
who live in this country are likely to be
pounced upon by mobs. These are a few
specimens of the sort of observations
which are made seriously by men who
have had presumably what we would
call a "common school education." Even
excellent business men sometimes have
hazy notions on such things. I once met
a delightful English gentleman, Jainea
Webster, of Liverpool He had Just made
a Journey for the first time In Canada
and through the Northern and Western
states. He expressed his hearty admir
ation of most of the things he had seen,
of the unexpected degree of civilized com
fort which he had found in our houses
and of the organization of hotels and
great stores even in some of the youngest
cities. He admitted that he had been
considerably surprised at what he saw.
"But." he added, "there is nothing which,
will give more amusement when I settls
down to home again and have my friends
around the table than to tell them what
I saw, then to watch how incredulously
they will listen to me. Why, I know that
some of them actually believe that It Is
not safe to go Into an American hotel
unless you have a six-shooter by the
side of the plate on your table or under
your pillow.
I have been told that Londoners In
going through 'Craven street, which
leads down to the Thames embank
ment from the Strand, in which a tab
let commemorates the site of the house
occupied by Benjamin Franklin when
he was the agent of the colonies, often
contended that Franklin was an Eng
lishman by birth, some even insisting
that he was one of the Presidents of
the United States! In one of the Lon
don newspapers the Express there
appeared not long ago a statemant that
Mr. Blaine once held that office at the
time when "Secretary" Garfield was as
sassinated, while the fact that the
Vice-President of the United States is
also the presiding officer in the Senate
ge'ems to be a frequent cause of con
fused thought In English newspaper
offices, as If it were supposed that he
was eleoted by the Senate and. not by
the people through the electoral col
lege. This part of our , method of
electing Presidents has been more
than once alluded to In editorial arti
cles in the English press, as if It had
created the Impression of being a sort
an institutional establishment, assem
bling every four years In Washington,
in a building provided for that pur
pose. Yet it .nay be doubted whether
such blunders are, after all, more nu
merous or morj amusing than those
which are made by a large portion of
the American ri-sj in its treatment of
British politics a .id its comment on
British publicists.
Jeff Hayes Grapevine Press Report
Hawaii, the Malta of
- the Pacific
AS indicative of the changing order
of things, political and commer
cial, in the Pacific Ocean, the Army
and Navy Journal quotes from the
Honolulu aGzettehe following signif
icant remarks regarding the strategic
Importance and insignificant defenses
of Hawaii:
"What is needed for the protection
of American coast cities and American
commerce In the Pacific is that Hawaii
should be made the Malta of the Pa-
BY JEFF HATES. IN THE TELEGRAPH
1 AGE.
ik ORE than a generation has passed
1 I since the occurrence narrated here
with took place, and at tins safe dis
tance In time and removed from the
scene of action, the perpetrator may
boldly crave an unconditional pardon for
the part he took in the affair. The re
lating of the Incident possibly will cause
those handling The Associated Press
news today to smile, certainly to mar
vel at the audacity displayed by the in
stigator of the proceeding, but it will be
admitted that times have changed. Yet
It cannot be doubted that had the truth
leaked out, the Journal which printed the
stuff Imposed upon it, would have come
in for an unmerciless criticism. . The fact
is, however, the Joke was never discov
ered, arid now, after a lapse of 30 years
and more. It is being told for the first
time. The circumstance to v hich I re
fer occurred on the evening of July 4,
1878. The writer was employed by the
Atlantic and Pacific Telegraph Company
to take press reports at St. Louis. There
was but one wire from Chicago to St.
Louis and that was the complete repre
sentation that this company had In that
big city. This single wire was kept very
busy, but, running over highways and
byways, it was constantly getting into
trouble and on the evening mentioned
the line was down, probably caused by
some enthuslatlc bucolic who made the
glass Insulators a target.
The St. Louis Chronicle had Just made
its bow to the public and was the only
client that the Atlantic and Pacific Com
pany had for the -sale of their ' press
news. That paper depended very much
on this branch of their service, and when
Its conductors were Informed that the
wire was down and that there would be
no news, the editor became very muoh
distressed over the unfortunate situation
that presented itself. The newspaper and
telegraph occupied adjacent offices and
the editor with growing anxiety made
frequent calls on the telegraph people,
persistent in his demands that in some
occult manner they fulfil their obliga
tions. He feared to Issue the paper with
out telegraphic news and What could be
done? I became very much interested In
the matter and was ready to do every
thing within my power to" help the paper
out, but there was no wire nor was there
any probability that the trouble would
be overcome that night.
During the height of the editor's de
spair, Henry W. Cowan, an operator
known from Maine to Oregon, quite acci
dentally dropped in to see me. Naturally
I explained to him the situation that
was vexing and worrying the whole of
fice. He listened attentively to all I had
to say and then asked in a droll way
whether I had ever heard of the "grape
vine telegraph line," suggesting that -In
an emergency such as then existed a
trial of Its merits might be successfully
appealed to.
What followed stamped Cowan as a
resourceful man of genius, one well cal
culated to overcome circumstances of the
most damaging character alike to Jour
nalism and the telegraph and avert threat
ened disaster.
When the newspaper man departed a
short circuit was made up from the man
anger's private office to the regular press
wire. A connection had at last been ef
fected. At this wire Cowan seated him
self and the news that soon began to
come in over this line clearly demon
strated the inventive cleverness with
which he was possessed.
The first Item that came over this line
was an Imaginary cablegram of congrat
ulations from Queen Victoria to President
Grant, felicitating him on the 100th anni
versary of his country's independence.
This was followed by an account of an
expected war in South America. They are
always fighting down there, so that was a
sure enough item. "How the President and
Cabinet spent the Fourth" came next, and
this in turn was followed by a little po
litical gossip concerning Samuel J. Til-
den and his chances for obtaining the
Presidential nomination. A few fires with
no casualties, a steamboat race on the
Mississippi were next In order. Then
came the Pacific States news. A blr strike
in the Comstock mines was related with
almost genuine sincerity; an arrival of
several thousand coolies at San Francisco
was also worthy of chronicle.
The report was copied in the highest
style of the art by Cowan and the editor
was in great glee. Some 10 or 12 sheets
of this kind ot matter was furnished when
the grapevine line, too, gave out, but the
newspaper man was satisfied. He even
wrote an elaborate editorial about the
Queen's cablegram to the President, com
menting favorably thereon, but he pro
nounced in scathing terms upon Tilden's
aspirations to the Presidency, calling the
attention of his readers to the item in the
"telegraph" columns.
I had serious misgivings as to the out
come of our -Joke, but resolved never to
speak about it unless the matter came up,
and it never did.
Cowan left for Chicago the next day
and that was the last time I ever saw
him, and It is presumed that he went out
of business furnishing press reports to
guileless newspapers. -
"All's well that ends well." and so- It
was In this case. The paper was satisfied
and its readers were probably also con
tent, but I wonder if such a hoax could
be perpetrated in this day and generation
and let it be passed by unnoticed!
Teaching Larks to Sing.
London Tit-Bits.
Strange as it may appear, there are men
who make a living by teaching larks to
sing. It might be Imagined that this is
much the same as painting the lily, but It
Is a fact that the ordinary cage lark re
quires a considerable amount of training
before it can sing well.
The untrained cage lark will imitate
sounds in the same manner as a parrot,
even such sounds as the creaking of a
gate. When these birds are neglected
sometimes tho only sound they will give ia
an Imitation of the twittering of the com
mon sparrow.
The man who undertakes the education
of larks has to be up long before day
break. In the Spring before the break of
day he goes out Into the country, taking
a great number of. cage-birds with him.
Reaching a strip of meadow he places his
burdens on the ground and patiently wait
for the coming dawn. About half an hour
after the first light appears the wild larks
begin to sing.
The wild lark always sings its best soon
after dawn; later on in the day its song
cannot compare for beauty with its earlier
efforts. The birds first begin to sing as
they run about the long grass, but they
sing" their very finest lays a little later,
when they mount high into the sky. As
they soar until they appear to vanish into
the azure, their song becomes more and
more beautiful.
It is a very strange fact that the im
prisoned bird hears only one of the free
brlds; though there may be dozens sing
ing, it has ears for that one only. Every
note of that song It remembers, and when
It is home in its cage next day it will ren
der the identical song with remarkable
fidelity, entirely from memory.
Henry Hudson Celebration.
New York Herald.
An interesting and definite plan has
now been put forward for the celebra
tion two years hence at New York and
on the Hudson River of the three
hundredth anniversary of the discovery
of the river by Henry Hudson, and of
she one-hundredth anniversary of Rob
ert Fulton's practical application of
uteam power for navigation. Ther is
to be an eight-day celebration, begin
ning Saturday, September 18, 1909, and
ending on the Saturday following. It
was September 19, 1609, that Henry
Hudson, in the Half Moon, reached his
farthest north in his passage up the river
to which his name has been given.