( THE StHSTLYT OHEGOlAr-POIlTI.AND, AUGUST 13. 1905. Entered at the Postofflce at Portland. Or., as second-class matter. SUBSCRIPTION BATESL INVARIABLY IN ADVANCE. (Br Mall or Express.) Dally and Sunday, per year.. W-W Dally and Sunday, elx months Dally and Sunday, three months Dally and Sunday, per month .5 Dally without Sunday, per Tear.. ' jjany wimoui ouuuaj, . , Dally -without Sunday, three months... l.os ours hag ajways been In varying degree xiaiir witnout eunoay, per - The dead past Is burying its dead. A passionate energy of opinion Is ac- j cumulating in the nation -which Is now rending and will continue more and more to rend men from their-old party relations and to redlRt-Hhiite them. The new. all-predomlnatlne issue Is clear enough. It needs no Pythoness to fore see the future thus far. We find it In volved in Lincoln's great, historic formula "Government of the people,' by the people, for the people." Govern ment has always been of the people; Sunday, per rear ' -J Sunday, tlx months Sunday, three months -vu BY CAKRIER. Dally -without Sunday, per week.. Dally, per week, Sunday included 0 THE WEEKLY OREGONIAN. (loaned Every Thursday.) Weekly, per year Weekly, sir months.. J .Weekly, three ropnths..,- 00 HOW TO REMIT Send postofflce money erder. express order or personal check on your local bank. Stamps, coin or currency ere at the sender's risk. EASTERN BUSINESS OFFICE. The S. C. Beckwlth Special Agency Kew iTork. rooms 43-50 Tribune building;. Chi cago, rooms 510-512 Tribune building. KEPT ON SAUK. Chicago Auditorium Annex, Portoince News -Co.. 178 Dearborn atreet. Dallas, Texv-Qlobe Newa Depot. 260 Main street. 6an Antonio. Tex. Louis Book and Cigar Co.. 521 East Houston street. Dearer Julius Black, Hamilton & Kend ylck, 803-012 Seventeenth street; Harry D. Ott, 1503 Broadway: Pratt Book Store. 121 Fifteenth street. ' Colorado Springs, Colo. Howard H. BelL Des Xolaes, Ia,-Koses Jacobs. 309 Fifth atreet. Goldflcld, 2fer. C. Malone. Kansas City, Mcv Rlcksecker Cigar Co., 2lnth and Walnut. Tjo Angelee Harry Drapkln; B. E. Amos. 614 West Seventh street; Dlllard News Co. Minneapolis M. J. Kavanaugh, 50 South Third; X- llegeleburger. 217 First avenue Couth. Cleveland, O. James Pusbaw, 807 Superior street. New York City I Jones & Co., Astor Houst. . Atlantlo City, V. J. Ell Tayljr, 207 Jortb Illinois ave. . Oakland. Cal. W. H. Johnston. Fourteenth and Franklin streets. Ogden F. R. Godard and Meyers Har top, D L. Boyle. Omaha BarUatow Bros.. 1612 Farnam. Mageath StaUontry Co., 1308 Farnam; JiG South 14tb; McLaughlin & Holix. 1515 Far nam. Sacramento, CaL Sacramento News Co., 428 K street. . Salt Lake Salt Lake News Co.. 77 West Second street South; National News Agency. Yellowstone Park, Wyo. Canyon Hotel. Lake Hotel, Yellowstone Park Assn. Long Beach B. E. Amos. San rraacleco J. K. Cooper & Co.. 74fl Market street; Goldsmith Bros.. 230 Sutter and Hotbl St. Francis News Stand; L. E. Lee. Palace Hotel NewB Stand: F, W. Pitts. 1008 Market; Frank Scott. 80 Ellis: N. Wheatley Movable News Stand, corner Mar ket and Kearney streets: Foster & Orear. Ferry News Stand. Ut. Louis. Mo. E. T. Jett Book & News Cnmnnnv RfYft OHr utreet. "Pennsylvania avenue. ) TORTLAND, SUNDAY. AUGUST ?3, 1D05. by the people. The question now is shall It be wholly by and wholly for the people? Is the world for the many or the few? To assert that the party names Re publican and Democrat are likely to go out of use would be folly. Both parties will persist, and the struggle for control will continue between them in the fu ture as In the past; but ultimately one will represent oligarchic, or possiniy monarchic, tendencies; -while the other will move toward pure democracy. And to this one belongs the future. The one will embody that distrust of the people which was abundantly displayed In the structure of the constitution of the United States, and which all history up to that time seemed to Justify. The other will embody a complete confidence in the people, which will lead It .to ad vocate the removal of constitutional restraints, the extension of the prin ciple of direct legislation, and,' the abol ishment of party machinery; with an Increasing control by the government over those modes of employing capital which offset the welfare of great masses of people. Upon this issue neither party has yet chosen Its position. In both of them a struggle is going on, not unlike a civil war. between the oligarchic and the popular elements. From both par ties there will be great secessions when either element shall have triumphed; and finally all men of like ways of thinking will group themselves under the same banner. There is good reason to believe that the Republican party will not. in the long run, be controlled by Its oligarchic faction. The leader of the oDooslnK sentiment Is a man of transcendent ability and dauntless courage, who seems likely to draw to himself not only the majority of his own narty. but also all those Demo crats who believe in the political phllo ophy which Lincoln taught and which Roosevelt is endeavoring to embody in the institutions of the nation Is.eminently fitting that this, the largest and most important meeting that has been held, should be presided over by Mr. T. B. "Wilcox, a man whose in dividual efforts in building up the Ori ental trade have brought forth aston ishing results. It is through his efforts that American flour has been Introduced into hundreds of ports and settlements throughout the Far East, from Ceylon to Vladivostok.' and a large number of other American products have followed flour Into those new markets. Second only to his efforts in pushing the trans Pacific trade has been his work for un obstructed water highways from the most remQte points inland to the high seas. The work of such a powerful and In fluential organization as the Trans Misslsslppl Congress cannot fail to be effective, and Portland and the entire Northwest are to be congratulated on having the meeting In this city, where the needs of the West can be under stood to the best advantage, and where a thoroughly western -business man can preside over the deliberations. THE NEW ISSUE. Evolution, Herbert Spencer tells us. Is a process of redistribution of matter and motion. Given an aggregate of any sort of units, If new energy flows Into it from any source, the constit uents will be torn with more or less vio lence from their old relations to each other and. after a time of disturbance and uncertainty, will finally settle Into new ones. Every schoolboy could Il lustrate this law from his chemistry. He knows that a mixture of 'oxygen and hydrogen, cold nd inert, suddenly, when heat is. added, changes its nature and appears as water. Heat is one form of energy. Visible motion Is an other. A box of pebbles gently shaken arranges itself in layers; or, if the stones are placed In 'strata In the first instance, the disturbance will leave them In new relative positions. Fol lowing out this thought. Kaut and La l Place, who had it in mind long before j Spencer, found that It would account j 1 ort the orderly existence of the physi cal universe. The evolution of political parties gen erally, perhaps always, begins with the influx of new energy Into masses .of men already .distributed under estab lished names and holding, or fancying they hold, well-defined principles. The new energy Is neither heat nor visible motion. It is that disturbance of the mind, subtle but all-powerful In human affairs, which we call passion. Any passion will do. .The desire for human slavery will tear men from their old al legiance, political and religious, and unite them in a new loyalty quite as effectually as "the hatred of tyranny and wrong. Self-Jnterest and cruel greed may weld men together to form a political party; but so, also, may lofty devotion to exalted principle. American parties have begun invar iably in passionate devotion to some cause, good or bad, wise or unwise. They have failed of ten, succeeded sel dom. And In the rare instances where their success has been long continued. It has always come to pass ultimately that they have found the original ques tions which occasioned their origin cither completely solved and laid at rest, or reduced to vain logomachies by the changes of time and circumstances. The Republican party arose from the ruins of older organizations shattered hy the passionate clash of Interests and opinions concerning slavery. It began. not as, an anti-slavery party, but. as one -opposing. Its extension. The Innate tendencies of the party, worked out by the march of events, have made It the champion of abolition, protective tariff. sound money and nationalism. All these questions, as political issues, are now dead or dying. Slavery has been abol lshed; the verdict of civil war and of tne supreme court ib mat we are a nation, not a ' mere aggregate of sov erelgn states; the gold Vtandard Is es tabllshed once and for all; while the tariff question has merged Itself Into the broader ethical and economic issue of the trusts. Nobody now believes. whatever he may pretend, that there is anything .eternally right or wrotig about a high or a low tariff. It Is all a matter of varying conditions. Somfi times one is better, sometimes' the other. The American people will never again divide over protection and free trade. except as that Issue intertwines itself with others which underlie and Include it. It is .equally commonplace to say that the historic contentions of the Democratic party have for the most part been granted, denied or nullified by time. All thlngi are fleeing from us, and, become Portions and parcels of the, dreadful past. And the sentiment of the party lead ers adds, with the satisfied lotus eat us alone. "what is it that can last? -Let us alone. They shy .away from new issues. All political parlies -in the past have been oligarchies t from sheer . necessity, and a new Issue to the leaders. is like a new play to a theater manager something more than likely to portend disaster. But the inevitable hastens upon them. SUNDAY SERVICES AT THE FAIB, Rev. Joslah Strong concludes that the Exposition is not a proper place for him to speak on Sunday. Dr. C. M, Sheldon, of Kansas, had the same Idea about his dut3 and has returned to Kansas. The Fair will be obliged doubtless to abandon a very worthy plan to hold a series of religious serv ices each Sunday, because the pro posed speakers balk. They balk be cause the Trail Is open on Sunday. It appears to make no difference to the reverend, gentlemen that the Trail was opened by court order and not by any act. positive or negative, " of the Fair management. The Trail is running on Sunday ajid that is enough too much for them. . The Oregonian Will not criticize Dr. Strong and Dr. Sheldon for their action. It will not Inquire what Christ would have done, nor suggest that he might have gone to preach the Word where he jcould have attracted the. greatest crowds. Undoubtedly Dr. Strong Is guided in this matter by his conscience, and so was Dr. Sheldon. But .so, we are sure, is the Fair management. The Exposition is a "show." The Trail is part of the show. So was to be the Religious Congress. The speakers were arranged for, and were to be palds-o. come here and talk at the Fair on Sunday. In order to attract gate money on Sunday. It was in this sens on ex actly the same basis as the Trail. If there was an agreement that, If the Congress was to run on Sunday as a gate-money attraction, the Trail was to close and we suppose there was the Fair management never vlolatedlt. The Circuit Court broke It. The Fair was powerless. Now. It would seem that the Exposition, having arranged to bring "these reverend gentlemen across the continent, and having no doubt paid them handsomely, is en titled to great consideration at their hands. The result of the Fair's enter prise, however, appears to be that In stead of haying a notable religious ex ercise within the Fair grounds, as it planned, an opposition attraction is set up by them outside the gates. Which Is unfortunate.- TRANS-MISSlSSirPI CONGRESS. The Trans-MlsslsslppI Congress which assembles In this city next Wednesday. haB In the iew years since its Inception developed Into one of the greatest factors In the Industrial de velopment of our country. It has been the means of uniting and solidifying in terests which in the past had, by rea son of geographical location, not infre quently been lined up in opposition to each other. Through the united efforts of this organization, It 1s now possible for any worthy project In any part of the United States to command the In fiuence and assistance of powerful husl ness Interests from all other parts of this great country. This aggregation of Influence "has perhaps scored Us most notable achievement In the placing on the statute books laws for the reclama tion of arid lands. Although the reclamation projects are now looited after by a separate . or ganizatlon. it waB directly through the efforts of the Trans-Mlsslsslppl - Con gress that this great work received the Impetus which it has gained, and to that body must be given a large share of the credit for the appropriations of $30,000,000 now available for reclamation of arid lands In the West. The meet ing to be held here during the coming week will be attended by. a large num ber of men of national reputation. Sen ators, Congressmen and government of ficials of high degree will be with -us. in .addition to over a thousand dele gates, who are typical representatives of the Industrial strength of the nation The baneful influence of politics. which "has killed so many good projects, lias not been Injected Into re cent meetings of the. Trans Mississippi Congress and any worthy demand that has "been made on the government for -assistance has had the unanimous support of the Texas Dem ocrats, Utah Mormons, Oregon Rppubll cans and all other members, Irrespec tlve of politics or religious belief. Next to the Irrigation -work, and the lm prgvement of waterways, no more im portant question Is before" the body than the expansion our trans-Pacific trade. AMERICA'S LAST WOODEN SHir. Yesterday's dispatches note the de struction by fire of the American ship Roanoke while loading a cargo of ore at New Caledonia for New York. The Roanoke was not exactly the last of her race, for there are still a few older American wooden ships In existence. but she will long be remembered as the most perfect type of the American wooden ship that was ever built, and also as the last of these marvelous cre ations of wood to leave the stocks and make way for the metal ships that fol lowed. The truth of the old axiom that there Is no sentiment In business Is seldom questioned or disproved, and shlpownlng and shipbuilding are strictly business propositions. Nevertheless there were sentiment, romance and glory hovering. over the' American ship of the old days, as well as over the "breed. of the oaken heart" that- manned and navigated It The Roanoke, bowling along at steamship speed with a 5000-ton cargo aboard, was a veritable triumph of the wooden shipbuilder's art, but In her per fection It was easy to trace back through the various stages of evolu tion to the Indian dugout which was the pioneer wooden water craft. Senti ment is nurtured and Increases as one draws near to nature, and the wooden ship or the craft which preceded It was In a sense a gift from nature to man Place a man on any Isolated Island on the globe where trees are growing. and In due time he will produce a craft that can float and carry a sail. All of the raw material (or an iron. or steel ship may be there in equal abundance with the wood, but it Is useless to the marooned man for boatbuilding pur poses. It required centuries of experiment and scientific research and costly roll lng mills, furnaces and factories to pro duce the first metal craft that would float and carry passengers and freight but from the beginning of history the wooden ship or the various types of marine architecture which preceded it. have been available for the use of man. The dugout of the Indian carried him across the lake" or up and down the river with less effort than was needed in maklnsr.the detour of the lake by land or In threading the forests along the river bank. Nature had always provided the material for the canoe of the American Indian, and centuries be fore, had by instinct taught the old world "Indians" Its use.. The metal ship was more than 400 years In the future when Columbus set sail for America In the Santa Maria, and that diminutive craft had not advanced very far from the dugout. Metal ships were out of the question when Joseph Gale In 1840 began building the schooner Star of Oregon at Swn Island, Just below where the city of Portland now stands, but the vessel was built right there In the forest which supplied the raw material for construction. The coming of the metal ships, of course, pronounced the doom of the wooden vessel, and the world will never again see such magnificent sailing craft as the Roanoke. Rappahannock. Sus- quehunna and Shenandoah, the last productions of the Sewall yards at Bath. Me. Out here on the Pacific Coast, builders will continue for sev eral years to launch wooden lumber carriers, suitable for .the coasting trade or fpr short off-rshore voyages, but al ready the metal schooner has appeared. and -In time even these wooden schoon ers ,wlll be replaced by the more mod ern type of steel craft. The change Js in the line of progress, but no one at all Interested In the "beauty and mystery of the ships, and the. magic of the sea" will note, the pass!n-.of these splendid structures of wood and canvas without a 'pang of regret. presslon In renewed energy in business and In the pure delight of getting home again and settling down to the orderly habits of every-day life. A RASCAL UNPUNISHED. The readiness with which the respec table people of a community frequently extend confidence and favor to an Ir responsible stranger Is illustrated by the career of. E. J. Dawne at Salem In the 70's and early SO's. Seldom In the history of this state have people displayed such density of perception and such disregard of merit and pro priety as when they took up with that man. who came to Oregon without a record, yet found no difficulty In prac ticing his frauds openly. The magni tude of his "nerve" may be Imagined when It Is announced that with his past record in public view, he now proposes to return to Oregon and claim a share in the estate of the woman formerly his wife, to whom he did-not claim the re lations of a husband for more - than twenty years. The circumstances will bear a mo ment's thought at this time for the lessons they teach. As one of those smooth, affable, warm-hearted men, who are always willing to do a favor for a friend, he easily made himself popular with those who.do not look deep for true worth. Falsely pretending to be doctor, lawyer preacher and money broker, he duped the people at every effort and flndlly accomplished the greatest of his frauds when he secured the signatures of men of wealth and In fluence upon his recommendation for appointment to an Alaska Judgeship. By means of this recommendation the prominent citizens of Oregon foisted upon the administration at Washing ton a man whose only service to the state had been such as was necessary in winning popular favor. His long, flowing beard and stately mien might easily have deceived men not accustomed to affairs of the active world, but should not have misled men of careful Judgment, It was fitting that President Cleveland should hold the people of Oregon responsible for the appointment and severely censured those who secured an unworthy man's preferment The harm that is done by seemingly successful deception of this kind is too great to be measured within the bounds of time. What Incentive does such success offer to young men to lead lives of uprightness, industry and useful ness? If an entire stranger can come to Oregon and secure public favor by the mere announcement of his name and the exercise of suavemanners, if he can continue for years to practice fraud tor his own financial gain and go unwhlpped of Justice. If he may oc cupy a place of the greatest public trust although basely corrupt at heart, as repeatedly evidenced by his deeds, what must the young native of Oregon conclude Is the proper course to pur sue in order to attain the desirable things of this world? The people of Oregon sinned when they let E. J. Dawne achieve the de gree of success which ,was his, and if that man be still ,allve and can be found, he should be brought to the bar of justice to demonstrate that the way of the transgressor Is hard. Left In peace and freedom to enjoy his Ill gotten gains, he -stands as a perpetual Inducement for young men to leave the paths of rectitude and honor and tp follow the apparently easier paths of deceit and fraud. publish certain alleged Information fur nished by them relative to the un favorable condition of the English hop crop. The Oregonian declined because It Is not wining to have Its columns used by PIncus & Sons or any other professional bop bears for the purpose of influencing the market In their In terest It regards all Information from this source with suspicion. It knows that this firm of PIncus & Sons are bulls when they have hops to sell and bears when they wish to buy. The wel fare of the grower Is of no concern to them whatever. If any producer pays the slightest attention to the circulars with which the Northwest has been flooded by PIncus & Sons, he makes a great error. The Oregonian has a natural and laudable desire to see the hopgrower get a fair price for his product: but it Is neither the organ of the bulls nor the bears., It prints all available information on hop condi tions at home and abroad from what it considers reliable sources. It prints nothing from PIncus & Sons. The speculators and manipulators, who prevent the Chicago wheat market from suffering with ennui, seem to have temporarily abandoned the chinch bug, the Hessian fly, rust and other old standbys. which have been doing duty for so many years. In lieu there of, they have been working the Rus sian crop situation to the limit For several days It has been rumored that the Russian crop was not as good as it should be. but yesterday a comfort ing report came to hand, and the Chi cago market slumped over a cent per bushel. In spite of a decline of more than 10 cents per bushel In the past month, the American markets are still above an export basis and unless there Is a sufficient demand at home for all wheat offering, still lower prices .are probable. Oregon breeders, years before the "bookies" gave the racing game a black eye. trained and developed some of the fastest horses that ever went down the grand circuit These trotters and pa cers were useful for other purposes than racing, and were not so well adap ted for gambling machines as the run ners that have since brought discredit on the sport. Syndicate books, doped horses, crooked racing and the riffraff of outlawry which follows the runners from place to place, have tarnished the sport of horse-racing to such an extent that It Is difficult to understand where the business of legitimate breed ing is to be Injured if all gambling on racetracks Is prohibited. The Corvallls Social and Athletic Club seems to be filling the long-felt want which has existed since local option de- prxvea uie city or saioons. it is stated. that the club already has a member ship of more than 200. and from the tandpolnt of economy Is proving much more satisfactory than the former method of securing spirituous liquor. The system has not yet been tested by law. but Its advocates are sanguine that it will stand the test. Jf the Corvallls Club, which was formed for the purpose of dispensing liquor, does no more harm than the "canteen." which Is an adjunct of the soldiers' cltfb. Benton County wlll not suffer greatly by its presence. THE VACATION STORY. The annual vacation heglra from home to mountain, seashore or coun tryside somewhere, so it Is only away from home Is one of the social phe nomena of modern American life. It has its roots In the industrial and busi ness prosperity which gives the multi tude money to spend, in pleasurerseek- ing. the accepted Summer type of wh!ch is Jousting about here, there, anywhere. eo as to be away from home. The myriads of persons who throng the boardwalks and benches of New Jersey coast resorts, the Summer set tlements that doc New England, the crowded caravansaries on mountain, lake and countryside, as the Philadel phia Press "says, have a tale to tell concerning our land and our times that is worth" hearing. The first signification of the wide spread vacation habit Is -that the Amer ican, people are restless, representing in aggregate a, moving-picture show. The next is that they are- prosperous and thus amply able to dress and act their part In the show'. Again, they are tired tired from the eeaseless activity In industrial, social and educational lines that they have come to regard as life, and. they seek rest .by getting tired In another direction. . The spectacle of a people at pTay is Interesting as a National financial statement Vacations as a rule are ex pensive and not Infrequently entail the cos o( 'sickness Induced' by a radical change In the manner of living, or of death due to accident That such large numbers of -people can afford the cost Is proof that accumulation has followed Industry. Not only are Americans, rank and file, making a living; they are well-to-do and disposed to be generous to thempelves. Having earned their va cation they spend upon It ungrudgingly and th.ere is every evidence that they get -pleasure and profit of a vital kind out of the expenditure. The pleasure BIGAMY AND DIVORCE. We read with something of surprise the statement of Dr. Samuel W. Dllk that there are more cases of bigamy than of divorce In the United States This statement Is the more astonishing because Dr. Dllk Is the most careful stu dent of marriage and divorce in the country, and Is not given to random or unproven assertions. Following the line of Inquiry that he has for some years pursued with the purpose of dis covering the truth, he has become con vinced that in any city or manufactur lng community there are more cases of marriage without divorce than there are of divorces. This Is a state of affairs more truly deplorable than frequent and open di vorce. In looking about us astonish ment at the statement of Dr. Dllk gives place to conviction of Its truth. Port land is not a great city, but the fact, as disclosed by the records of our char itable institutions, is that very many of the beneficiaries of these are de serted wives and children. Deserted wives abound here, and for every one of them there is a man who not un likely is enjoying the comforts of home made and kept for him by another woman who believes herself to be his wife and In her turn will be abandoned Domestic tragedies thus based are of daily unfoldment Now and then they are disclosed by an arrest for bigamy and a trial In the courts, the details of which are more or less sensational, ac cording to the prominence or obscurity of the bigamous husband. But In the large majority of cases the deserted wife struggles on In silence, maintain Inc herself and her children, if she can and, failing In this, appeals to the man agero of the Children's Home, the Baby Home or the City Board of Charities for help to carry her heavy burden. She has under our law and customs ab solutely no vrecourse. and society a patient burden-bearer puts Its shoul der to the wheel and the recreant hus band and father moves on unpunished to repeat his matrimonial experience In another community. In Germany, big amy Is made difficult by a law which requires a man who has but recently come Into a community to advertise his marriage where he formerly resided. The record of the marriage in a new residence Is returned to the old and there recorded, thus malting the law against bigamy In a sense self-oper ative. With us a man of vagrant nab Its can marry practically unquestioned wherever he takes up his abode. The woman In the case is a fool. In that she puts her trust in a stranger, but she Is not Infrequently a simple minded hard-working creature who thinks she sees In the proposed marriage a chance to better her condition. Too often she finds out her mistake after one or two children have been added to her load and she is left to carry It unaided. Interstate registration of marriage would offer some safeguard against bigamy. A provision like that In Ger many would be of some benefit, but per sonal vigilance, based upon wholesome suspicion, on the part of friends, family and. above all, of women themselves, is the only reliable safeguard against this most vital of social frauds. Is fleeting, to be sure, but the profit Is J For this reason, 14 Xgr no -.other, Itjjol the substantial kind) .that finds ex The Oregonian observes that certain Tacoma hopdealers. Isaac PIncus Sons, have rushed Into print with com pjAlDi jJiat .thfr. sipex iAs .declined toJ The death of Mrs. Mary Cooper Rob Inson. which occurred yesterday at the home of her daughter, Mrs. Howard Crofts. In this city, was the passing of woman closely Identified with the pioneer life of'Oregon. Mrs. Robinson was a daughter of Rev. Jesse and Su san Moreland. Born In Tennessee In JS32. married in Illinois In 1851. coming to Oregon In 1852, Mrs. Robinson was a pioneer, practically speaking, in-three states widely separated. Faithful to the simple duties of life, she lived and worked and passed on, leaving behind her a record of womanly fortitude -and of devotion to family and friends. 0REG0JT0Z0NE "It has occurred to me many times." says the Unofficial Autocrat, "that If women really looked like the female figures we see In the. fashion Journals, we men would walk around a ten- acre lot to keep from meeting them; we would' take to the woods every tlmo we sighted one of the freaks, or if wo really couldn't get away In .time we would feign Insanity and froth at tho mouth to keep from recognizing thorn. I never could see Just why It 13 that the fellows who draw those female figures for fashion plates Insist upon putting the waist of a wasp in the middle, to divide lovej.- women into two parts, like a sack of meal tied in the center with a string, .ready to throw over the back of a mule and. tote to the mill. I never could, really. Aid don't believe the women can, either. I hereby call upon the women to arise and cry down this bnse llbeler of their henutv. There never was and never will be, while God reigns and the re public at Washington still lives, a woman with a shape like that which the fashion plates assign to her. No woman with a waist liKe mac coum get breath enough to live ten minutes; and if she could live no man on earth ever could so far-forget his-Inborn no Hons of physical beauty as to fall In love with her. In the words of the late. lamented Bret Harte: 'Is civilization failure, and has the Caucasian played out?' I refuse to believe It." According to Drake Watson, in the Kansas City Journal: I have been hearing or the busy bee until am tired ot It. A bee works during, the Summer and then reata all Winter, like nlitrr- And a. bee has bad habits. Go Into a vineyard and you will find bee drunk ards around bursted grapes. The drunkard bees alp the Juice until they become full and thn fall to the ground and sleep oft tfcetr ae bauch; a drunkard bee know' enough not to go home with .a Jag-. Which prompts us to say to certain bipeds wno do not know "as much as tho bee. Go to the bee. thou drunkard consider his ways, and be wise. "In the United States we are prone to talk too much," says one of the pop ular newspaper, essayists. That Is just what Polly the parrot said, after she had called a passing pedestrian blankoty old fool and had been beaten over the head with an umbrella- Whatever tho .plenipotentiaries at Portsmouth may do regarding peace" or war, there Is lasting peace down- at Grass Valley, and' the alfalfa crop is a three-bagger, while the nop crop Is going ahead at a hop. step and Jump stride. The Houston Post tells about a negro revival meeting In Tetfas. where the preacher, after a fervent prayer, "gave out" the following hymn. Including many othcr stanzas like It: I went down to de river And baptized a nigger. But dc nigger told a lie Before his head got dry. Wo are - not disposed to criticize the rhyme In this verse. What's thV Use? It may be all right to publish stories about "descendants of Explorer Lewis," but the generality of us have been taught to suppose that' a man who never marrjad Is not supposed' to have left' any descendants. k CQLUMN OF VERSE Kusslu 1ST05. J. V. Foley, in New Tork Times. A red hazb- hung over the mountain. The flail In the valley was still. A lone woman wept o'er a baby that stent - And the grain lay ungrcund at tke mill. A. plow In the half-cloven furrow. A forge that was amokelew and dead. While over It all hung the snlllRra?. a paH. - And the haze o'er the mountain, blood red: And over and over and over. By village and farmhouse and hln. A haze, bloody red, all the landscape o'er- sprcad And the valleys deserted and still. The earth at the seedtime unbroken. The fields at the harvest ungleaned. And lone vigil kept by a woman who wept Ith a babe at her borora unwfar.ed. Then down from the mountain a horseman Dahetl. plumed and ewerded and mattdi Nor hrard he the moan of the woman alen. Nor saw he the grain all unflalled; "To arnwl" for the battle was bloody: 'To arroa!" for the columns were thinned; And over the land rang hi brazen command. For his horse wore the wings of the wind. Then fathrle?s !nd from their hovels Went shouldering ponderous gunp. And old men and gray tottered weakly away To And the rude craves of their eons; For Country I? higher than kindred. And what Is the glory of od Unwet by the flood of Its yeomen's red btooJB And war 1 It not more than God? So women with babes at their besaras. rZflZf.il mit ner th fitrmn!! iintllld Through the haze resting red like tne blood that was sned In a far-away struggle unwilled. And eyes that are swollen and anguished Uplifted In silent appeal: "O God of the Poor, doe thy mercy endure When thy monarchs Know naught but oC uteel?" And over and over and over By village and hamlet and hill The haze resting red like the blood that la sbed. But the flail In the valley Is still. The earth at the seedtime unbroken. The fields at the harvest ungleaned. And a lone vlglf kept by a woman who wept With a babe at her bosom unweaned. The Obituary Poet Laureate. College Farnjlng. (A Kansas newspaper Is authority for the statement that some of tho young men who aro arriving at the harvest fields come In patent leather shoes, .nhlrtwalsta and pegtop trouwrsi) Mine eyes have seen the glory of th coMega harvest hand. He's working down In Kansas with a dress suit, understand. Arid his 'patent leather danelng pumps and peg- top panta are grand; The hands are marching en. I have seen blm In the college, with ate bulging high, white brow; I have heard him give the college oheer, SI boom!" and llkewke "WowT But he's sot another Job, you see. and he Is worklnc now; The hands are marching on; He baa left his Greek and Latin far the har vest fields of tell. And he'll stand out In the sunlight and hettl roast and fry and boil And hln face will set streaked and striped .wh grimy Kansas soil; The bands are marching en. And Cholty carries with him In his suiteajo. t they say, ' A shirt with t!ffened bosom and seme stkis both rich and gay. And a let of ether togs and things to make a great array; The band are march-lag oc And likely he has with him In hts handsome drew suit case Soma fine complexion lotions for s-: tn his face. And doubt lesd on his nlghtroben there are rat tles trimmed with htce; The hands are marching on. They fear the yellow frockle and the tfctok. plebeian .tan. And wunt a llk umbrella over evory tomes man. And by and by each one . will want a ei electric fan; The hands are marching on. ' Chicago Ctronkele. Ala., poem If semi-official report is to be cred ited. Rockefeller proposes with $50, 000,000 to fulfill the desire to makeChi cago University the greatest seat of learning In the world. Mere money can't do it. There must be- also char acter, brains and age. Mr. Rockefeller may be assured, however, after he Is gone, that Chicago will not let the uni versity suffer from lack of exploita tion. August is- an appropriate month for holding the National Irrigation Con gress In Portland. President Roose velt's visit two years ago happened to be earlier in the season and his flrst public utterance, voiced In a drench ing storm, was; "While I am Inthis part of Oregon I shall not refer to" the subject of Irrigation." The City Council is soon to wrestle witn a z&-year gamage contract.' ir a clause can be . Inserted requiring, the contracting company .to remove the thieves, bunco men, pickpockets and burglars that infest the streets, tax payers won't object to compensation that will pay a good profit. Mrs. Sarah A. Evans, who has been appointed market Inspector In this city. is an active member of the Woman's Club and a woman of much energy and public spirit. It Is hoped that she will bring to her work zeal tempered with Judgment A Chicago man came home Intoxl cated Friday and his wife suggested to him that he should go and drown him self. He did. But he left a letter reproaching her. She 'oughtn't to worry. It was good advice. Orderly state Is Missouri when the Governor Is afraid to leave home for two weeks. Can't he put his constlt uency on their good behavior for this brief period, or must he flourish the big stick all the time? Under ordinary circumstances, the detective Is on the side of the prosecu tion. In Portland, Just now, he Is lined up with the defense. The battleship Kansas was christ ened with water because Governor Hoch would have it so. You wouldn't think that of Hoch. Need of about two days of Oregon's reputed weather Is apparent; not for agricultural purposes but for comfort. No one can complain of secrecy In the proceedings at Portsmouth. It looks now as if there must be more war before there is peace. A suggestion to the plenipotentiaries Why not leave it to T. R.I . The poet of the Enterprise, at Adams, has written the model owtuarj Here It is let It speak for'ltsolf: Do not grieve for him In sorrow to bow; If he'd lived any longer H'd have, died anyhow t He- went In hbi youth Cut down- like the Illy; . He will never grow old And be crabbed and chilly. Let us all learn the lessee Before Life's December: Folks have been dying Since I can remember! "Suffer tho Idttle Children." Rev. E. F. Hill, pastor of the First Pres byterian Church, of Portland, refused to ais- trlbute badges to the cmjaren o: nis aunoaj school entitling them to -admission to tho Im position on' Presbyterian Sunday School day at greatly reduced rate. Decause tne iron- nun been opened on Sundays.) Three hundred little children of the Sun day, school were gay. Because the Exposition had assigned to' them a day. That Mr. Goodejs vcry.goodt' the. happy children cried; . 'We'll go and "have a Jolly time hurrah for our side!" Their, bestes bib. and tucker thay, got ready every one And scarce could they await the day, to be so full of fun. So fraught with wondrous sights to see. with things of beauty rife; 'Twould be- a day to recollect for all the rest of life. Ah, don't you know It, .bearded man tho thrill those children felt. Though many years have-gono slnoe you at mothers knee have knelt? And don't yon know It. matron grav the Joy of little girls? Eor you were once a child yourself, with saucy, sunny curls. The little children ah, the dear good God above us knows. They have their share of sorrows, of the weight of human woes; And Christ, you know, hath told us, "Ye have done It unto Mc, Tf even to the least- of these. Then suffer -ahem," said. He. But when the day came "round at last, the children of -the poor Thev sat and sobbed their hearts out (their election wasn't sure: They weren't called to pass within); their -pleasure had to fall. Because of Sunday antics on a place they call the Trail. Now, as' a fiumble layman, and a follow er- of Him Who loved the little children, I, with all my might and vim. Demand the privilege to rise right here and ask, "Would He Deprive 'the least of these' of joy?" Yo preachers, answer me! ROBERTUS LOVE. Busy Day for a Kentucky Groom Henry County (Ky.) Local. Mr. Shirley Craig and Miss Rosa Scott eloped to Bedford and were married Wed nesday of last-week at an early morning hour, after which the groom did a hard day's work on the .farm. Hallway Accident. " Chicago Tribune, arm on the back of the c-fat Beemed to grow bolder And presently a misplaced switch -- Lay-on hU ahoulder" Tho Impossible. W. J. Lampton In St. Paul (Minn.) Desrateh. We tried a moral nos race La.it season at our Fair, With Deacon Jones presldln. To open It with prayer. We offered purses plenty To have a lively raee. But not a bit of bottln' Was 'lowed around the place. The Methodists and Baptists. The Presbyterians. Episcopal and so forth ' Fell right in with our plans. And come out to th,e meetln To show a boss race could Be- Jlst as good a hoes race And likewise moral good. The air was full of Sunday. And though we seemed to feel All right. It sorter -wasn't As If the thing was real. And when we got tho hossea All lined up at the flag. The starter tried to start 'em. But every golderned nag Jlst balked and stood there solid; They wouldn't move a foot. And splto of all Inducements They staid where they was put. At last Aunt Sallie Hasklns, The elder's second wife. From Old Kalntuck. and 'qualnted With hosses all her life. Got up and shouted: "Brethren. I hate like sin to bolt. But I'll bet fifty dollars On that Kentucky colt." Then Deacon Jones uplifted And hustled 'cross the way A-yellln: "Here gees fifty On that St. LouU bay."- Tou ought to seen them hosses t Gee whiz, .before the slack. ,. Was took up ln-the bettln . , They run twlco 'round the track. The Traveler's Dream. Tit Bits. A. little room In a little hotel. In a. little country town. On a little bed, with musty smell. A man was lying down. A great big man with a great big snore For he lay on his back, you see And a peaceful look on his face he wore. For sound asleep was ne. In his dreams what marvelous trips he made. Vht hcatu of stuff he sold! And nobody failed, and every one paid. And his orders were good as goiu. He smiled, and smothered a scornrui lauga Whpn his fellow commercials crowea. . For he knew no other had sold the half Of what his order book snewea. He got this letter from home one dny "Dear Sir We've no fitter term To use In your case, but simpiy to say Henceforth you are one 01 tne nrm. And a glorious change this made 4n -his lift He now from the road withdrew; And. really, soon got to know-hts wife. His son. and his daughter, too. But with a thump bang-whang thump bang! again. The "boots" had knocked at the door; "It's very near time for that C:10 tralnl" The commercial's dream was cer. hal The Music That Carries. S. W. Glllllan In Succeas Magazine. Tvn tolled with the men the world blessed. And I've tolled with the men who failed: I've tolled with the men who strove with And I've tolled with the men who walled. And this le the tale my oul weuld tell. Aa It drifts o'er the harbor bar: The. sounds of a sigh don't carry well. But the lilt of a laugh rings far. The men who were near the grumbler's sldo. Oh they heard not a word he said: The sound of a eong rang far and wide. And they barkened to that Instead. Its tones were sweet as the tales they tell Of the rise of the Christmas- atar The sounds of a sigh don't carry well, , But tho lilt of a laugh rings far