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THE SUNDAY OREGONIAN, PORTLAND, DECEMBER 6, i)03.
31
P7VRTIES AT THE WHITE HOUSE
PRESIDENT ROOSEVELT HAS ENTERTAINED MORE THAN
ANY OTHER CHIEF EXECUTIVES RECENT YEARS
wierv?!pB!'1
WASHINGTON. Dec. L (Special
Correspondence.) December al
ways opens the season of White
House hospitality, but until New Year day I
tke functions of the President and his
family are unofficial. Dinners are the
rule, and the present Chief Magalstrate
has Justly earned the title of "the dinner
giving President."
Theodore Roosevelt, has, during Ills
short stay in the White House, enter
tained more people than has any former
President in his entire pfficlal career
not excepting those who have enjoyed two
terms. Besides the prescribed state levees j
and banquets, he has given private din- j
ners galore and last Winter he was the j
host at numerous muslcales at which 300 J
guests were Invited at a time. Yet he is
ot a rich man by any means. His prlv- ,
.ate Income has recently been estimated j
at between $5000 and JT0C0 a year. White J
House hospitality grew to be so lavish j
toward 'he end of last season that Mrs. j
Roosevelt's private secretary was accused
f compiling alphabetical lists of thou-
eands of more or less distinguished Wash-
lagtonlans and transients of the capital
and of supplying these names en bloc to I
tao official addresser and flller-ln of in- j
vltatlons. I
While our young President holds to the I
theory of Andrew Jackson, that the Exec- J
utlve Mansion is the people's house, he
does not open its doors to the great un- j
washed and run the risk of drunken
squabbles or the use of viands as missiles
for guests to battle for place withal.
An administration usually ends with a
climax of social splendor. The present
Winter will no doubt eclipse the two Just j
passed In extravagance of executive hos- j
pitallty. !
It is his luncheons which have perhaps j
brought Theodore Roosevelt most fame
aa a "host. During the Winter It is his i
. . , ,-i ..i M .i ,
custom to bring several of his official (
callers through the west terrace and up
to the dining-room.
On Bare Mahogany.
One of the innovations of the Roosevelt
regime has been the use of the new state
dining-room for those quiet functions of a
quasi-business nature. The President hav- j
ing a large family of children, two lunch- j
.... . ,. 1
eons may t,hus be served at once The ,
large mahogany table of the state dining- :
room will comfortably seat 14 at these 1
,. . .jj-
luncheons two at each end and five on
each side. The President always sits at 1
the center of the side opposite the great ,
marble mantelpiece, where a chair much
higher as to back .than the others 1s
placed for him. A similar chair is added
directly opposite when Mrs. Roosevelt
joins one of these companies. For lunch-
eon the President prefers the bare ma-
hogany. whose high polish reilects the
plate, cut glass and 'Wedgewood.
It is these unofficial luncheons, dinners
-.. -rv .. .. .. w ..t t- ine menus lor sucn mncuons very care
stow true hospitality upon the guest . fuUy. He preferred his private dinners
These are the dinners that endure the Berved "family style," and usually did the
supreme test-you think well of jour host carving, himself. One of his dietetic pe
and of the company when you wake up," ' culiaritles.was a marked aversion to lob
te Bttijamin Harrison of these private j ster. the very odor of which crustacean
White House entertainments, In his-"This t caused him nausea.
country oi uurs. une ex-i-resiaent, ror i
clearness sake, might Tell have added
"next mornlncr ' nftpr "nnVe nn " TIawi. .
'next morning" after "wake up." Harri
son did not regard state dinners as bril
liant affairs, and he had participated In
many, both as host and guest. Said he:
-j.nese siaie dinners cannot ne wnoily j
which are the accompaniments of all
state affairs. There Is no opportunity
lor general conversation and the chef
and your neighbor at table have your
fate-In their hands."
The bost notable of the private dinners -j
of the present Administration was that
given to Prince Henry of Prussia two
Winters ago. Only ten people, all told,
had their knees beneath the round ma
hogany of the private dining-room.
At the many private dinners wMch
President and Mrs. McKinley gave to
their hosts of young relatives .mineral
-waters were the strongest liquid bever
ages served. Tms was consistent with
iho home practices of the martyred
Ohloan and his wife. But because of the
bfficial character of state dinners he did
not deem It proper to inflict his Individual
view's upon the guests of the Nation.
The President's private luncheon and
dinner guests are received in the red
ELIZABETH
AMONG THE POINTED FIRS. My
Dear Nell: Since last writing you,
we have passed through such a ter
rible experience that I scarcely know how
to tell jou of it. Not only robbery, but,
oh, Nell, murder! I shudder as I write
the word.
To think of It It, in this quiet, out-of-the-way
place, where we felt so safe, so
eecure! Is there any place in this world
co isolated that villainy shall not sooner
or later find it?
Though this awful tragedy occurred
three nights ago my nerves are still quiv
ering. I feel so weak and unstrung that
I fear I cannot write calmly, and must
ask you remembering what I have suf
feredto kindly overlook any incoher
ency that may appear.
This whole wretched affair happened in
the ballroom, most Incongruous of places!
We find that entrance to the room was
jy way of the roof, which the
nust have reached by climb
alder tree standing near the
e house. We now believe him
t .i l secreted there when we went
- My blood runs cold when I
4 it swarthy, scarred, whiskered
x . . lose dark, sinister eyes watch
i out the shadows. Just think
fiend hidden away there, from
ltll 12, then with cautious, ca4
tealing upon us in our sleep.
;htful awakening! That des
u. iggle! Five shots rang out
'if Jdinght air and then oh, well,
i 'i him with a quilting frame!
awns upon me that Tam not
story in the right way. How
Drters manage these things? I
j tragedy should have come
I should have led up to It more
describing the events preced-
scene of the conflict, with a
f the room, showing the posl-
' -uch piece of furniture, the nole
e t and all that sort of thing. Too
j I'll have to begin again and
t . over. Well, may be It will
,. or you, Nell, it will postpone
& ng details and give you a
i t -egaln your composure.
' r coming here believing that
' i days were over we decided
" he ballroom by making a bed
By doing this we could re
only one! below for a possible
could ourselves have the pleas
r ilng upstairs, where we could
e . n falling upon the roof,
' r from cavei and tossing leaves,
"" as against the pane.
-j good a thing to miss." Tom
this land where the rain it raln
J day and night, too, for six
-2t our furniture up' that nar-
.r-th
parlor, whither they customarily repair i
with their host and hostess after the I
meal. According to tradition the Presi- s
dPnfl may appropriate this one of the four
state parlors for his own private use I
nhlni,,r h. . ..,- T fhftH ,,. nv
I the red parlor was a cozy den. with
books and periodicals Ijing about on the
tables. But now It Is appointed with the I
dignity of the remaining rooms through j
wnicn visitors are usnerca aunng tne cay.
i For his eening muslcales President
Roosevelt utilizes the great east room.
"where a new gold piano costing ?5000. and
recently presented to the White House.
reposes in one corner. Guests at
musjcales are generally received in the
green parlor, adjoining the east room.
o--t e.i.. t-
Back-stairs Gossip,
,
JJ baslsU T??Sf,p.S have estImated
tha l McKInley s private dinners
ct?8 hlm pIc on he average, and
the ataJ? Sclal,r' wno act!j " pUr"
veyor durnS Cleveland s and McKInley's
and parts of Harrison's- and Roosevelt's
Administrations, is quoted as saying that
Mr. McKinley was "the easiest President
to please." But the last President was
RaH tn , .,. nnrMrMiir -h,t !,
dinners,- and It Is said that he perused
President Cleveland was more of nn on!.
cure. His favorite dishes were canvas-
.. j... .,.- . . . . . . . . '
back duck, lobster and oysters. Consistent
with his Bohemian tastes, this President
preferred the little late suppers in which
only his most intimate friends could Join
him. Thomas F. Bayard, while Secretary
of State, used often to preside at the
chafing dish during these late suppers.
and his favorite recipe was terrapin stew.-j
Whenever B, W. Gilder came to the White j
iiouse .rresiaent uieveiana. caued upon
him to make one of his famous sherry
cobblers.
President Harrison had a very delicate
appetite, and was as exacting as an in
valid about his diet. His hobby was mak
ing salads.
Of course, the marketing and the en
tire commissary scheme of the White
House are reduced to an Ideal system.
Henry Pinckney. a negro. Is paid J1S0O a
5 ear by the Government for his services
as steward, and inasmuch as he is the
custodian of the Executive Mansion and
lcsponslble for the safekeeping of all of
Its plate, glass and china, he is put under
bond for the sum of $20,000. He was Mr.
Roosevelt's butler before the succession,
and displaced Sinclair, of the same
swarthy race.
I row, perpendicular stairway was a prob
lem; fortunately It was still crated. Bert
and Mary volunteered their assistance,
and finally through much pushing, shov
ing, groaning and some maledictions the
deed was done.
Then Thomas had some dark hours
there, removing tacks, nails, screws,
boards, drugget and excelsior, and In put
ting the various pieces together, after
which Elizabeth brought her mighty tal
ents to bear upon the situation, toiling for
days trying to bring order out of chaos.
I once, Nell, gave you a description of
the ballroom, but perhaps you have for
gotten It A room 20 feet wide and about
a quarter of a mile long; side walls rough,
unplaned boards running up and down;
no ceiling overhead. Just the rafters and
shingles; its spaciousness and a beauti
ful smooth floor Its only redeeming-features.
With two full chamber sets and
some extra furniture for which there was
no room below there was still left a va
cant space of sufficient size -for a couple
of cotillions.
At one end of the apartment was a plat
form about a foot high for the use of the
musicians ih "the brave davs of old."
Upon this dais feeling like one of royal
birth I placed my bedstead. Tom, upon
beholding It, Immediately dubbed my part
of the room "Mrs. Boffin's Bower."
Suspecting spiders in the roof, large
sheets were tacked to the rafters above
each bed, canopies which added to the
general effect; the one above the dais
looked so grand that I felt a sort of awe
of It.
As a finishing touch a few. rugs were
scattered overt the floor; the decorative
artist turning to leave, paused la the door
way for a critical examination of the
"all-together," and was forced to the con
clusion that a bedroom In a barn would
have been quite as attractive.
Up to this time it had been raining
' steadily, though gently, for days, but the
feornlng my great work was completed
it began pouring In torrents, growing
w orse toward evening, with a strong wind
blowing straight from the' ocean (some
thing very unusual here).
When Tom had finished his evening
work and was standing on the porch,
shaking the rain from his stormcoat, he
called out, "A fine night for the Abbey,
Elizabeth!"
"Yes, won't it be glorious?" We were
in high glee. Couldn't wait for our regu
lar bedtime; put our booRs aside early,
covered the embers In the old stone fire
place, lighted a hand lamp and were
ready for the ascension soon after 8
o'clock.
Do you remember my telling you, Nell,
that one of the chief architectural oddi
ties of this place was the lack of an en
trance to the second floor from the Inside
of the house? The only door to the stair
way being an outside one, at the. end of
Vy, fJZJ-EW STjTETmiG-15(DMtac0NEWJIS0001slAM01N-EAST 1 $ OfeyTT 'SmMP &3'
flRs? M2 jtable; j3ErTu&jmcnEQN yjr J -room sfiQ) MsmWz.
was IWsfflmM
-1 mill IBIifllM If If
PInckney starts out every morning In a
dayton wagon and makes his round of the
market places. He pays spot cash for
evervthlnc which he huvs nnr! Vir haa nn
understanding with each dealer that the
.. ... ... .
President's patronage must never bo used
as a means of advertisement. Shopkeep
ers and marketmen who disobey this rulo
lose the White House custom. While the
stewards of millionaires are said to make
small fortunes in commissions given them
by marketmen, it Is the White House rule
that no bribe of this kind shall be taken
and that no particular dealers shall be
favored. Staple groceries for White Housa
consumption are bought quarterly, meats
three times a weekand fresh vegetables,
fruits, etc, dally. In the days prior to the
enlargement of the White House (here
was no wine cellar, and great trouble was
experienced In storing liquid beverafs for
future needs. But under the new arrange
ment good wines can be bought when in
the market, and put away for functions
to come.
Benjamin Ogle, the friend and adviser
of Washington, said of presidential state
dinners: "The sum of $2 for each truest
j Is a very liberal allowance, and within a
I few francs of the price paid by Louis
Phlllippe, King of the French, the rich
est monarch of the world, to his purveyor
for providing the most sumptuous ban
quets at the Tulllerles." At this rate Mr.
IN HE"R CREGON HOME
i a very long, narrow porch. Tom, In ad
j vance of me, Jamp in hand, opened the
door of the dining-room, gave a whistle
of surprise and began to sing
Come fcrrr me o'er, come ferry me o'er.
Over the river to Charlie.
"What's the matter, Tom?"
"Look arid see!"
Mercy! The darkness of a tomb, a tor
rent of rain, wind rushing through the
wet fir trees, driving the flame of the
lamp out of tho chimney, smoking It
black; the floor of the porch all bumps
and hollows, mostly hollows, each filled
with water, gleaming In the lamplight.
"It's hideous, Tom; we can't make it!"
"We've got to make It! Faint heart ne'er
won the second floor of anything. Til
hold my hat over the glim, you lock the
door, then we'll sprint for our lives."
It was no sprint, I can tell you. We
went tiptoeing and teetering across the
sloppy, slippery links, like a couple of
pnze cakewalkers.
When at last the goal was reached we
' looked at each other in speechless amaze
I mont. Such an uproar was never heard
' outside of bedlam. Accustomed to a plas
tered celling, with a garret above, this
pounding of the rain upon a roof directly
over our heads was positively deafening.
Not at all like rain, more like a down
pour of rattling bullets or cobblestones.
Through the open windows came the tu
mult from outside. Deerleap out of Its
banks was roaring like Niagara; the wind
writhing and swishing through the flr
f boughs; the spring at the kitchen a
mighty cataract, throwing a big, noisy
stream of water half way across the
porch. (Under Tom's window, thank good
ness, not mine!)
Avoiding the eye of my fellow sufferer,
I remarked Indifferently, "Sort of bois
terous. Isn't it?"
"It does seem a little so. Just at first,
Elizabeth."
"Yes, I meant Just at first."
Truly, Nell, we could scarcely hear each
other's voices. After the lights were put,
out, the turmoil and bluster were even
more terrifying. The dampness of the
room was something awful, like that of
a charnal-house. Even the dais had Its
drawbacks: bringing me so near the xoof,
those bullets seemed burying themselves
in my brain.
After while Tom shouted through the
darkness, "Isn't It sweet, this gentle pat
ter of the rain upon the roof?" .
"Fine!" I shrieked, "so soothing, like a
lullaby!"
"What? I can't hear you!"
Then tho Duchess of Devonshire sat up
In her royal couch and screamed, "so
soothing, like a lullaby!"
"Oh, yes And this Cataract of Lodore.
too. Just under a leliow's head. Is a
mighty nice thing! Tomorrow let's make
us some megaphones."
As there was no hope of sleep, I fell a
thinking of the palmy days of this ball
room, when, as we are told, the devotees
of the dance came from 20 miles around
to tread a gay measure here. I thought of
the nallkcg we found upon the dais, which
had probably been uscdas a seat by one
i r i.i, . . r
JEW EAST ENTRANCE TO WHITE HOUSE WHERE GUESTS
ARE TSFCEVm
Roosevelt's state dinners In the new state j bed chambers qf the mansion. But since
dining room, whose horseshoe table seats j the enlargement of the White House there
seventy-two, would cost him about $144 ( has been ample room for functions of all
apiece. As a matter of fact, a state din- j sort3. The only defect in the new ar
ner at the White House costs anywhere j rahgement, from the standpoint of com
from $500 to $1000. according to the occa- I fort, was In the heatlnc of the East ter-
slon, and there are generally four such
functions per year.
Ten Courses, Five Wines.
It is an old White House rule that state
dinners shall consist of tsn courses, with
five wines, and ending with a pousse cafe
and cigars. Speechmaklng is never in
dulged In, and the guest converses with
no one save his immediate neighbor; This
has been the rule since the time of "Old
Hickory," who broke over the traces and
even indulged himself In song late In
the course of his state banquets. The old
state dining-room of the White House
seated only fifty guests at a tremenddus
stretch, and the later Presidents were
wont to set their banquet tables in the
hallway, upon which the doors of all of
the state apartments opened. It was a
drafty place, and It never occurred to any
chief magistrate before Roosevelt that the
east room might be put to Its original In
tended use that of a "banqueting hall."
The first state, dinner under the Roosevelt
regime was held In that great apartment.
During Mrs. Cleveland's social reign she
served luncheons In the hallway of the
second floor, which opened Into all of the
of the musicians, as an empty violin case
was leaning against It.
It seemed a favorable time for ghosts to
walk. What If that long-ago violinist
should come back tonight and perking
himself on tho chair that had ousted his
keg, suddenly begin "to plonk and plunk
and pllnk and to rosin up his bow,"
and should start up all the phantom
belles and beaux of the shadowy past,
and I should hear slippered and pumped
feet sliding up and down the long room;
should catch the scent of bergamot and
patchouly. Just here I heard above the
roar of the tempest: "Honors to sour
partners," "Join hands and circle to the
left," "Balance all." "Swing on the cor
ners." "Goodness, Tom, are you crazy?"
"No. ma'am; It's Just water on the
brain, I think. But didn't you hear him?
That old fiddler at the head of your bed
Jerkin' off 'Old Dan Tucker,' and all tho
fellows skatln' across the room to secure
their partners? Just to be friendly, I
thought I'd call off fpr the spooks."
Neither of us will ever forget that night,
and two or three more that followed.
Then tho deluge ceased, the ballroom be
came an Ideal place for sleep. So delight
ful to He there listening to softly falling
rain, night winds soughing through the
forest, owls hooting In the orchard, nature
music as dellclously lulling to the senses
as the "drowsy wine of poppies."
Now. my friend, the midnight adventure
can no longer be postponed. Get your
vinaigrette, be calm and brace yourself
for bloodshed.
During the night to which I have re
ferred I woke suddenly without any ap
parent cause, but with the sure conscious
ness of something being w4bng; soon ver
ified by the strangest sounds, as if small,
soft hands were very gently patting Jube
Juba (can't spell it), an awfully creepy
sound In tho dark. A little later came
stealthy footsteps, nearer and nearer,
seeming to approach the dais. Then did
the classic brow of Elizabeth grow damp
with perspiration, her heart beating audi
bly. She longed to shriek to Thomas, but
dared not give away her location, lest
brawny fingers should clutch her -throat.
Soon there was a rustling among some
clothing hanging on the wall, quite near
her, as if they were being fumbled over.
Flesh and blood could endure no more.
' "Tom! Tom! There's somebody in this
room! Get a light, quick!"
"How foolish you are, Elizabeth. If y'ou
hear anything at all which I doubt it's
only the squirrels running over the roof."
"Don't stop now to talk! Do hurry with
the light."
Reluctantly and with great deliberation,
the gentleman arose, muttering something
about "Idiocy."
I honestly believe, Nell, that Tom would
rather be shot quietly In bed than to be
called out of it
Just as he struck a match, a horrible
race, through which all save honor guests
now enter for the great functions. This
summer a new heating system was laid
and while excavations were being made
In the old kitchen at the Inner end of
tne terrace a. numan sKeieton was uik
earthed several feet beneath the, floor. V?
was incased in an old-fashioned brick
oven.
The Dinner "Dummy,"
"Making up the dummy" Is an Import
ant step preparatory to all big White
House dinners. The assistant secretary
to the President has before him a paste
board plan of the great horseshoe table,
along whose edges are slits correspond
ing to the number of covers to be laid.
Into these silts are thrust cards bearing
tho names of guests. After the .menu
cards have been arranged In alternate
silts, those of the ladles are taken up,
and by dint of much rearrangement, shift
ing and shuffling the puzzle Is finally
solved to the satisfaction of all hands
concerned.
Many official tempers are ruffled if this
little game of solitaire Is not worked out
perfectly by the last functionary who
RECITAL OF
-
hairy creature bounded out of those i
clothes, leaped to the wall, and ran along j
a rafter to the comb of the roof. j
"For heaven's sake! What is that thing,
Tom?"
"That. Elizabeth, is the celebrated wood
rat of. the wild and woolly West, and he's J
the fellow who has been feathering his
nest in that old tree, with our collars,
neckties, hosiery, shoestrings, etc."
I myself secretly believed It to be a
wildcat; It was such a monster, with the
face of a fiend, eyes of fire, and was wav
ing the big, bushy tall of a squirrel.
"I'd shoot him, but my shotgun Is in
the barn, and Just today I fired the last
cartridge from my revolver."
"Get my rifle," I said, swelling with
pride. A friend visited us a year ago, a
fine sportsman, who came with four guns,
gave me when he left, a lovely little rifle.
"Where Is it. Elizabeth?"
"Downstairs In the dining-room."
"All right!" and off he started with tho
lamp.
"No you don't, and leave me here In the
dark with this thing."
"Such a coward!" as he gave up the
lamp, and went blundering off in the dark
ness. Pleasant situation. Nell, standing at
midnight In the middle of a room, glar
ing Into the eyes of a waldcat!
After what seemed an age, Tom came
back, remarking with some bravado as
he loaded up: "Now, my bold outlaw, your
hour has come."
I held the lamp; he flred; no effect what
ever. "I thought you said his hour had come."
"It has, Elizabeth, If he'll stay there
long enough, and the ammunition holds
out."
Twice again he shot, and then the thing
ran down a rafter, and was hidden from
us by the canopy above the dais.
Now the brave lady was encouraged to
mount to the top of her bureau, and try
to locate him. With lamp In hand, as she
stood peering Into the shadows, the rifle
man asked, "what dost thou see,' Rebec
ca?" "Holy prophet of the laws! I see the
Knight of tho Pointed Firs! his towering
plume waving above the second rafter."
"Walt, I'll fix him!"
Going Into the next room, he came back
armed with one of the parts of the quilt
ing frame we found here when we came.
"Now then. Just about where Is he?
"Close against the side wall."
The quilting frame cut a wide swath cf
air, and struck solid wood. Running
straight up the rafter just over myhead
came the rat. -
"Good gracious! Take this lampyqulck!"
and then I made the leap of my life.
"Now, Tom, you hold the light and I'll
show you some Buffalo Bill marksman
ship." Drawing my trusty rifle to my
shoulder, I shut both eyes. My partner in
crime called out, "Ready! Aim! Fire!" and
I blazed away.
"That was a hot shot, Elizabeth; he
must have winked his other eye at that!"
as he snatched the smoking weapon from
my hand and fired again.
The rat humped his back, waved his taiL
lazily, looked down upon us so dreamily j
takes his turn at it. Every one in Wash
ington official life has a decided view as
to his own particular rung In the steep
ladder of precedence, and in many cases
these individual views differ widely from
those of the powers that be. There must
always be two honor guests, a man and
n woman. Contrary to the usage of civ
ilian society, the stranger is not neces
sarily the honor guest. The official of
highest rank present and his wife are
gl en these coveted seats beside the Pres
ident and the first lady of the land, re
spectively. There have been several historic squab
bles over the seating of White House
dinner guests. Diplomatic relations be
tween Spain and the United States
came within an ace of suspension a quar-
ter century ago because the President at
a Private dinner offered his arm to the House dinners Is told by Crump, who was
wife of tne British envoy, whereas the steward during the Hayes regime. In
Spanish Ministers wife had social prece- January. 1SS0. Mr. and Mrs. William
dence. The war clouds that were gath- . Waldorf Astor were guests at the Presl
erlng caught the eye of the tactful Sec- dent's board. During the dinner Crump
retary of State, ivho diplomatically i hininM tr. fu,,vin,. ,o. o..
righted the wrong in the nick of time.
During Jackson's administration
"
ouni aerruner, accreuiteu nere as
French Minister, and a member of the
Cabinet had a squabble over their seats
at a White House rilnnpr. "nift 'mlmr-i?"
at a White House dinner. "Old Hickory
decided In favor of the Cabinet member,
whereupon the Count, In a huff, 'ab
sented himself. Jefferson, who was al-
A BLOOD-CURDLING MIDNIGHT ADVENTURE IN
THE BALLROOM UjNDER THE ROOF
that I really thought he would bo asleep
In QKnn r mlnnfA 1
"I guess we'll lay aside our firearms,"
Tom said; "as we have already shot five
holes through the roof. He is too much In
the shadows, we can never hit him. (This
was an excuse, Nell, for his poor shoot
In; I could see him plain enough slttlntr
on a cross-piece high in the roof.)
"I'll see if I can't punch him out of
there, with this." Mounting my bed with
that frame, he threw it like a harpoon;
It went flying through the room, and down
at my feet with a dull, heavy thud fell
the rat.
Mercy! I flew to a chair, which proved
to be a rocker, and fell over; then, lamp
still in hand, I jumped on Tom's bed.
He shouted:
"Look out there! You'll burn yourself
and the house up!" As he went chasing
the rodent up and down the long room,
upsetting chairs and stools, tho quiltlng
frame whacking the floor with the regu
lar rhythm of a flail.
Upon that lofty eminence, holding aloft
my Diazing torcn, I relt as If I were j
Hero" lighting Leander across the Helles
pont. Suddenly the pursued left the open,
ran under the bed and up the wall, Just
back of me. I sprang to the floor, Tom
Struck at him. knnrltpri n hnc. t-nn.
from the top of the bedstead, and the rat
firm. tViA v. nil .nn .1 , 1
"u"" " nun ucm uiu corner ot me
room. y
"Pull the bed away, Elizabeth, and I'll
give him a side wipe across the floor
that'll fetch him."
"I sent the bed spinning to the middle
of the room, followed It up, and climbed
again to my lookout. The "side wipe"
was made, didn't fetch him, hut fetched
down an easel and a picture.
"For pity's sake, Tom. don't break all
the furniture in the hout-e! Ltt's go down
stairs; don't let's kill him tonight"
"A lot of killing you're doing!" prod
ding under the washstand.
"If you're punching for that rat, he
isn't there. He's under that couch."
"Did you suppose I was down on all
fours, pokln under that thing for fun?"
as he crossed over to the couch.
"If you'd get off your perch, and set
that confounded lamp down, and come
and pull this, thing out, I'd get him here."
"Honestly, Tom. 1 can't. Ho might run
,acrcss my feet"
"Fiddlesticks! I'll get my high rubber
boots; you put "-m on. If he comes your
way, t youi foot on him, and hold
him 'til I come."
"Positively, Tom Graham, you make me
deathly slck.'
"Well, yvu '.ake me tlrea; do you
think I want to chase this blamed rat
all night?"
"No, I don't."
"Well, then"
Here the party under discussion, tak
ing advantage of the family Jar, dashed
from his lair, ran across the room, hid
behind a pile of magazines, and there met
death.
A moment later the red-handed slayer-
ways getting entangled in the meshes of
official etiquette, once refused to escort
the wife of the British Minister to hia
board when that lady enjoyed precedence,
and grave correspondence was afterward
exchanged across sea as a result of the
slight.
When such entanglements are feared
the "dummy" Is taken across the street
to Alvey A. Adee. Assistant Secretary of
State, who, because of his great author
ity on matters of precedence, has been
facetiously dubbed "the President's tutor
in etiquette." With the aid of sufficient
cups of tea, brewed In his office, Mr.
Adee can always untie the most knotty
problem, affecting official good manners.
Negro Diplomat's Danger.
A canard in effect that Mrs. Roosevelt
had decided to turn out all of the negro
servants of the White House was soma
time since started the rounds. Practic
ally the entire domestic force of the man
sion has been turned over to our African
brethren since the first President took
his seat, and one good reason why they
are preferred is that they may be distin
guished from the official guests. The
Haytlan Minister Is a colored gentleman,
and when he was. first accredited there
was some fear that some swagger En
glish diplomat In a peck of brass but
tons and a bushel of gold lace might tap
him on the arm with an "Ah, me mon,
will you show me me seat at the table."
But his excellency from the black re
public has gold lace of his own. These
colored-waiters of the White House are
down on the rolls as "laborers," and are
paid $2 a day, according to a custom which
which has long obtained.
State-dinner service at tho White
House Is furnished by a caterer, to w hose
chefs the official kitchen is surrendered
during the function. The Nation's new
$20,000 service of Wedgewood and cut
glass Is,' however, used, together with the
official linen and plate, while the White
House waiters are depended upon to do
most of the work above stairs. Five
colored women a cook, assistant cook,
scullion and two laundresses have long
been carried on the White House pay
roll at $1 per day.
A good story of one of the Whlto
derinff about the apartments. When oc-
j costea, tnis man explained that he was
private detective, hired to watch Mrs.
Astor's diamonds. When ordered out ho
explained that this, was the first time
i i i. i j ,-.. ,!.. -,
when he had lost sight of Mrs. Astor
while on duty In nine years.
JOHN EIFRETH WATKINS, JR.
(Copyright, 1903.)
all smiles now crossed the room with
halting steps and slow, carefully balanc
ing the remains of the poor forester upon
the end of the quilting frame, saying:
"To the victor belongs the spoil."
"I'm glad of It; I don't want 'em."
Going below with his victim, he called
back from the stairway: "Might you ba
wishing, Elizabeth, to retain his brush aa
a souvenir of the high jinks of a night
In the ballroom?"
."No, thank you; I've had enough of
him."
Oh, that room, Nell! If a cyclone had
swept through It, It would have looked
no worse.
As the curtain fell upon the last act,
t.ie clock struck 1. The pursuit began at
12. But such is life In the Far West.
ELIZABETH.
Brattleboro's Loss.
"W. D. JJesblt In the Chicago Tribune.
Brattleboro. Vt. Rudyard Kipling's homo
hero has been sold at a great sacrifice, and
he will not return.
"What aro the folk"? a-rushln for?" asked
Cnp'n. Illrnm Si ado.
To hear the bids, to hear the bids," tho
suqcrvlgor said.
"What makes you hustle on so fast?" asked
Cap'n Hiram Slade.
"I want to see who gets the place," tho
supervisor said.
For they're sellln off Naulahka. you can
'ear the auctioneer
"E's a urgln on tho bidders with Ms ac
cents loud and clear;
E's a coaxln 'em to buy it Wich It Isn't
very dear.
An' we're Iosln' Rudyard Klplln' In tho
mornln.
"What makes the people bid so low?" asked
Cap'n Hiram, -Blade.
"It's got to sell. It's got to sell." the super
visor 6ald.
"Who was that bid a dollar more?" asked
Cap'n Hiram Blade.
"I couldn't see, I couldn't see," the super
visor said.
They are sellln' off Naulahka, they art
'ammerln It down.
They are laughln' at the bungalow a squat
tin on the groun'
It'll sell lrf 'arf a minute you can ofcr tcs
warnln soun'
An' we're losln' Rudyard Klplln' m the
mornln'.
"One time 'e cussed m good an 'ard," said
Cap'n Hiram Slade.
'"E's cussln other folks today," the super
visor said.
"One time I thought e'd knock mo down."
said Cap'n illrasx Slade.
"They're knockln' down the bungalow," tho
supervisor said.
For they're sellln off Naulahka It Is gola'.
goln', gone!
An the broth'r-In-law 'e's turnln all is
giddy laughter on.
An 'e's rakln up the I.'s that was dropped
upon the lawn
An we're losln Itudjard Klplln Inv tho
mornln'!