?Tff''"y- y r" SfiPJy""''" w IT , -t - i.-mE. SUNDAY OEEGONIANJPORTLAD, OEMaBR, . 3, 1901. 27 - . ' ,. -- ir-qrrg-W r3-yr-TT f 7efff$ ? -f?f WW"7?" f "?,'. ""4,'Wfrr '"w:J FVlMf THINGS IN Mr. O'Rafferty On Civil Service. Informs Mr. O'Toole Why He Didn'l Join Chicago Police. "Is it so, Mr. O'Rafferty, these rumyures Ol do be heerln iv yez J'lnln th' p'lace force?" asked Mr. O'Toole, as he en countered the wise man on the steps of Chicago's City Hall. "Oi dinnaw, Mr. O'Toole, fwhether 'twill be so or not," replied Mr. O'Rafferty. "Me lntintlons up ontil yisthcrday wur inclolned that way, but this marnin' a wee bit lv a damper was placed upon me Tboigh-fiown notions. "Xcz see, Mr. O'Toole, 01 made up me xnomd t' lave th' likker bisniss and J'lne th' p'lace foorce. So OI made lnquoirles lv th' Ahlderman lv th warrud. "Twas he who lnfarrumed me that Ol wud have t' undhergo a civil sarvlce lxammynation, an' dirlcted me t' a proflssor who cud coach me in th' quistions fwhich wud be axed lv me be th' Ixammynln boord. "Takln th Ahlderman's p'lnt, Ol cahllcd on th' professor. "He was a yoong laddybuck, wld a pair lv crooked boicycle ligs atttached t a. fwholtc vist. "Indade, Mr. O'Toole, he's nick was that shmall an' schrawny Ol Ixpicted ivry mln jute f see it give way t' th.' hift iv he's lxcaldlngly lar-rge an' holly-lookin' Yale sthudlnt hid. But on closer obsarvation Ot saw thro th marlcle. He's hid was hild In place be manes iv he's shklnny Jowls riitin' complaclntly atop iv th shnow fwholte coof fwhich insarcled he's shklnny nick. 'Tvrns Rather Odd. "It earned quare, Mr. O'Toole, that sich a shklnny little ar-rtlcle Iv" man shud know so much constrain' th' quistions t' be axed Iv'blg, sthrappin' min. "At anny rate, OI tould him th' r'ason lv me cahil an handed over the tin dollars fwhich he charged. 'Satein' me 'longsoide iv he'ssilf, he commlnced t question me, as he sidjist as th' civil sarvlce ixammyners wud quls tlon me. " 'Mr. O'Rafferty,' sez he, 'fwhat does th' p'lace foorce riprisint?' " 'Are're yez a dummy lntoirely?' sez OL Th p'lace foorce riprlsints a lar'rge body lv daiclnt an rayspictible Olrish gin tlemin sez Oi, an' a few scattherin Garmans an' wan or two Ammerycans,' ez Ol, wld Bllley Pinkerton's min on hand t do ahll th dirthy wurruk,' sez OI. "A shmoile passed over th' proflssor's Chonalse colored face at this, Mr. O'Toole, an Ol tho't Oi was doin' spllndid. " 'how many burricks ar-rc there In a wahll chwinty fate holgh, chwlnty fate long an wan fut woide, th' burricks beln' two be foor be eight Inches?' sez he. "OI cudn't fr th' wurrul lv me see f whoy th divil a p'laceman shud be run nin' about counthln th burricks in ivry wahll on he's bate, Mr. O'Toole, onllss he lntinded lavln' th' foorce an' bacomin' a bulldln' inspechtor But, annyhow, bav in' carrid burricks f'r manny lar-rger wahlls, OI was able f give th' laddybuck he's answer. It All Depends. ' 'This accordln'," sez OI, 'f how close ez watch th' conthractor an he's min,' oez OL 'Av yez kape thim undher th' glim lv yo'er oyes,' sez OI, 'tn' wahll will hould ahll th' burricks fwhich he has dapposited on th'e perairie 'longsoide an' a few Ixtry loads baysoides,' sez Oi. 'But lv yez lave thlm go 'long widout watchln',' sez Ol, 'th blag'ards will All tip th lnsoldes iv th' wahll wld th car plnthers tin-penny nails, raisin cake lift over fr'm th' newly marrid wurrukmln's loonch, ould tin cans dayposlted in th vicinity be ixtramely worrld dogs, bur rick dust, scanthin's an anny other ould thing fwhich have bin lift bayholnd be th billy an' nanny goats lv th' neighbor hood, sez OI " 'That bein so,' sez OI, twud be ix tramely harrud t answer ye'or qulstion "widout countin th burricks -wan be wan, an as that wud nayclssltate th pullln' down If th wahll. sez Oi, Oi'm afeared th' burricks would not be counted. "Th proflssor -wiggled about onaisily on he's fate fr afwholle, an' thin sez he: " 'Mr. O'Rafferty,' sez he, av yez wur on th foorce,' tez he, 'an wur confronthed wld a labor riot,' sez he, 'fwhat wud yez do?' sez he. " 'In that case sez 01, 'me lxpalriance have tayched me t' lave th min have their rooctlon out Mesllf going t' th' outskirts lv th' crowd an bateln' in th hlds iv th l'aders,' sez Ol. 'Not th' l'aders lv th riot, sez Oi, 'f'r they ar-re br-rave, but mislnfarrumed min. but 'tis th l'aders iv th min fwhin no danger is about," sez OL "Th laddybucks who cahll thlmsilves aggltatore, ahlways houldln soft jobs In th' unions,' sez 6i, "tillln th min f kape out lv poly tics, but ahlways bobnobin' wld th polytlcal l'aders thlmsilves ontil a chans-t arrolves fr thlm t' sill out th' mine,' sez OL, About the Philippines. " 'Now, Mr. O'Rafferty,' sez th' profls sor, 'fwheere an fwhat ar're th Fillyfane Olslands, an' be who ar-re they con trolled?" " 'Yez misundherstand me, proflssor, sez OL ' Tis on th' city p'lace foorce Ol wish t sarve, an' not as a p'ace dis thurber undher th' lmpty-hlded gln'r'ls :n th -Fillyfane Olslands, sez OL " 'But. me man, sez th' proflssor, 'these ar're ahll-Impoortant quistions, fwhich yez'll undoubtedly be axed he th civil sarvlce ixammynln' boord." " That beln th case, sez Oi, 'In my oplnyun an' fr'm fwhat Ol've heerd an rid In th' pa-apers,' sez 01, 'th' Fillyfane Olslands ar're a pardliv olslands sitty wated Julst nare enough t Choina t sick en anny daiclnt an rayspictible Ammery can glntleman wid th shmell iv opium, chop suey an yokl mal.' sez Ol. 'Their infoorcemlnt upon th' Unolted States,' sez OL 'was a par-rt Iv th 520.000,000 far fate fwhich we paid t' Spain f r th' prlvl lige lv worrltin' her wid our display lv strlnth.' sez OL 'Of late, sez Oi, 'th olslands have bin undher th' conthrol iv a par-rty lv git-rich-qulck ar-rmy min. who have taken ivrythln in solght save the grasy male sacks off th" shklnny boacks Iv th naygur Inhabbytlnts, sez OI. "OI cudn't say fwhat it was. Mr. O'Toole, that riled th proflssor. But, annyway, he rose fr'm he's sate, handed me boack me tin dollars, an sez he: " Mr. Rafferty,' sez he. 'me tolme he's too vally'ble t' ho wastln' wid th' lolkes iv yez. Ol've asked yez some lv th' most impoortant quistions iv th ixammynln boord,' sez he, 'an' yez haven't answered wan lv thlm corrlctly. Yez may be able t run up a laddher wld a hod lv burricks moighty lolvely sez he, 'but yez'll niver make a p'laceman,' sez he. O'Rafferty Moralize. "But iv th proflssor was roight In he's quistions, Mr. O'Toole, 'tis alslly sane fwhoy th' p'laceraln do be bateln th hias lv rayspictible cityzens an contilly shlapin' 'on their bates. Shure t' aven sthudy up on sich ijjyotic quistions wud be enough t' dhrolve anny man crazy. "Baychune oursllves, Mr. O'Toole, Ol think th' p'lacemln shud be tayched now f capture disthurbers iv th' p'ace, and lave alone f sthrugglin Fillyfane Olslands an th' burricks in daycint taxpayers' nrahlls." JUSTUS GOODB. Didn't Find Her Honey. A young married woman from the South who was visiting New York a few days ago with her husband left him In their hotel room one morning while she went on an errand. She was not accustomed to big hotels, nor to big New York, but she got back without mishap in half an hour arid knocked at the door. There was no response. "Let me in, honey," said the young woman, knocking more vigorously. Still no response. "Honey, let me In!" called the young woma'n, redoubling her exertions. "Honey, honey, let me In!" She rattled the knob and shook the door and pounded with bvath fists, but there was the silence of the grave on the other side. The young woman's voice rose to half a cry. "Honey, aren't you there? I want to get in. Honey, open the door!" Then arqse from the other side of the ONE OF THE "How did yez get thot eye?" "Ol cllibrated me blrt'day the other avenln. ( : r POEMS WORTH READING . v s : ; J The Orpnnlst. I wonder how the organist Can do so many thlntrs; He's getting ready long before The choir stands up and sines; He's pressing buttons,- pushing stops; He's pulling here and there, And testing all the working parts "While listening to the prayer. He runs a mighty big machine. It's full of funny things; . A mass of boxes, pipes and tubes, And sticks and slats and strings; There's little whistles for a cent. In rows and rows and rows; I'll bet there's twenty miles of tubes As large as garden hose. There's scores, as round as stovepipes, and There's lots so big and wide. That several little bojs I knov Could play around inside; From little b!ts,of piccolos That hardly make a toot. There's eery size up to the great Big elevator chute. The organist knows every one. And how they ought to go; He makes them rumble like a storm. Or plays them sweet and low; At times you think them very, near; At times they're soaring high. Like angel voices, singing far Off, somewhere In the sky. For he can take this structure that's As big as any house. And make It pqucak as softly as A tiny little mouse; And then he'll Jerk out tomethlng with A movement ot the hand, And make you think you're listening to A military band He plays It with his fingers and He plays it with his toes. And if he really wanted to He'd play It with his nose; He's sliding up and down the bench. He's working with his knees. He's dancing round with both his feet As lively as you please. I always like to take a seat Where I can see him go; He's better than a sermon, and He does me good. I know; , I like the life and movement and I like to hear him play; He Is the most exciting thing. In town on Sabbath day. George W. Stevens In Toledo Times. "Roll On, Niagara." Roll on, Niagara, roll on! Continue thy descent. Aye. let thy torrents tumble down Like waterspouts unpent, . With swoop and swish and swirl and slide A sisht one can't forget A wondrous, awful, thrilling and Stupendous bunch of wet. Roll on, Niagara, roll on! What do you care for me? Yet I love you because you're not Jest working for a fee. You do your duty every day. With ne er-falllne drip. While guides and drhers on the shore Keep hustling for a tip. Roll on, Niagara, roll on! The grandest sight on earth. . Cut loose your soul-lnsplring roar, I want my money's worth. Yes, crash and dash and smash and lash, With billows fiercely tossed. Do all the funny stunts you can. Tor I must count the cost. Roll on, Niagara, roll on! Thou marvel of all time, (Excuse me while I get my purse And give the guide a dime.) Roll on, old cataract Immense, I like you well, and, say, I'll slve a dollar more to see You roll the other way! Baltimore American. door a deep, bass voice, with a resentful note in It. "Madam," It said, "thia Is not a bee hive. This is a bathroom." New York Sun. Just a Way They've Got. As a matter of fact, Janet was born exactly two years before her brother Fred. Therefore, In the natural course of things, when he was 10 she was 12, and gloried in it. When Fred was known to be 14, she still confessed, to sweet 16. When. Fred boasted 18 years, she timidly ac knowledged herself Just over 13. When Fred came home from college, and had p. party in honor of his 21st birthday, Janet said to her friends: "What a boyish fellow Fred is! Who would think he is only a year younger than I?" When Fred declared himself 23, and old enough to get married, Janet said to a gentleman friend: "Do you know, I feel very jealous of Fred getting married. But, then, I sup pose twins always are more attached to one another." And two years later, at Fred's wed ding, she said with a girlish simper, to the guests: "Dear old Fred; To see him married today, and to think when he was only Ave years old they brought him in to see me, his baby sister! I wonder if he thinks of It now?" Philadelphia Inquirer. Little Johnnie Heard From. Mrs. Bllklns (sweetly) Do have another piece of cake, Cousin John. ' Cousin, John Why, really, I've already had two; hut it's so good I believe 1 will have another. Little Johnny (excitedly)-Ma's awlnner! Ma's a winner! She said she'd bet you'd make a pig of yourself. Brooklyn Life. PRESENTS. The Bnmninge Sale. The ladles planned a rummage sale. They buzzed like busy bees; They rushed around In eager style. All bound to raise a handsome pile For .worthy charities. They gathered their old petticoats, Their worn-out waists and skirts; They put in Bessie's pinafore, The last year's hat that papa wore, And Bobby's undershirts. They hurried here, they hustled there, With all their might and main; They took Aunt 'Liza's plush coat down And Cousin Sarah's weddlnr gown, And grandma's counterpane. The ladles' hearts were full of glee, But, oh, a horrid man Cried out: "Beware of deadly bugs That lurk in ancient rags and rugs!" And trouble then began. "Look out!" he crlejj, "for germs ablda In every petticoat!" The ladles rose up wrathfully, And In a chorus said that he Was lying In bis throat. They said he was a nasty thing To try to balk them thus, ' Their stuff, they vowed, was clean and nice. As cheap as dirt at half the price, In no wise danger-ous! Too late, too late, he understood; He dared not face them all, And, like a hunted stag the man, All wet with persplration.ran To where the woods were tall. They dared him and they badgered him, They called him undersized; The town was stirred up o'er the fuss He raised who feared the germs, and thus The sale was advertised. The people flocked from near and far. They bought and bought and bought. And when they closed 'twas whispered that The ladles were astonished at The prices things had brought. Long live the man who hollered "Germsl" And when the ladles fair Get up a rummage sale again May he be still on duty then To raise his little scare. ' Chicago Becord-Hcrald. In Honeymoon Days. There's billing and cooing and kiss upon kiss. There's long- sips of nectar and deep draughts of bliss. And some one writes "Mrs." where once she wrote "Miss," For hearts are ablaze With all of love's Are, while lips frameth speech Where amorous phrases are linked each to each, ' And somebody's "dovio" and some one Is "peach," In honeymoon days. There's something he says calls her sweet blushes out. And she ows he Is "naughty" with prim little pout. While they both thank their ' fortunate stars, without doubt. - - That there's no one to see When a waist is encircled" and some one's held tight. And somebody kisses her breath away quite. While some one Just lets him with "ohs!" of delight. In honeymoon days. June marks the beginning, and how the days fly! Time drags rather wearily on through July, And long' before August has thought to pass by Departed's the haze That veiled them from vfew, and they've lifted the ban That shut out the world a most sensible plattl But ah. Folly lords It o'er nhUden and man, In honeymoon days. Detroit Free Press, Maxims for Some Occasions Wise 5ings for Everyday Application; An' You Desire. "Eat, drink and be merry, for tomor row" the cook will go on a strike. "Every cloud has a sliver lining" but usually it is made of German silver. "Everytnlng comes to him who waits" Including despair and decay. "The darkest hour is just before dawn" at least it seems darker when you are trying 'to And the keyhole. "A squeaking door hangs a long time" and no one ever thinks to oil it. "One swallow does not make a Sum mer" no, nor a meal. "It is a long lane that has no turn" and sometimes it dpes not turn atN all; It Just ends abruptly at a precipice. "A soft answer turneth away wrath" but it is Just as well to be prepared and keep your nand near your pistol pocket. "If at first you don't succeed, try, try again" even If you have to Impress It with a club. "Virtue is Its own reward" at least it Is the only apparent one up to date. "A good conscience makes a soft pil low" as does alo the knowledge lhat you have tomorrow's rent money. "Where there's a will there's a way" usually the wrong one. "Love laughs at locksmiths ' but sometimes It laughs on the other side of Its mouth, and has a mighty 'hard time in the divorce court trying to find a skele ton key that works as easy as that love lock did. " 'Tis better to give than to receive" this holds good even to a blow. "Forbidden fruit Is sweet" but you're very apt to choke on the seeds. Ella Costlllo Bennett In San Francisco Chronicle. Pnt' Idea of It. "A few Sunday's since," said a young Catholic clergyman from Up the state, "I took occasion to remind my congre gation, which Is located in a mountain town, that I needed some money for ne cessities In connection with the church. 'With Winter coming on,' I said, 'we will need plenty of coal. The church must be kept warm, both for the comfort of the congregation and the preservation of the building. 'The collections during the services today and next Sunday will be devoted to the coal fund. "Just at this point .Ned Flannlgan, one of the oldest parishioners, who occupied a front-pew, "began to laugh. I was rath er indignant, and when church was over I hurried out of the sacristy and took Flannlgan to task for laughing. " 'What do you mean by such conduct, Flannlgan?' I asked. " 'Faith, I couldn't help laughln,' Fath er,' he explained. 'That wus a purty good'sthlff you give the people about the coal. What would you want coal to hate the church for when 'tis hated be steam?' "Philadelphia Record. Sick for Cash. "That boy of mine has got to turn over a new leaf," declared the well-known citi zen, who It is doubtful really knows how much he Is worth. "It Isn't so much' a question of money as It is teaching him its value. He has been away most of the Summer, and the letters he has written home have been short but to the point more money. "Growimr tired at last of his repeated FROM NATURAL CAUSES. Wash Mulllns cussed, an' said as how He played de fdur for low, Coon Snipes, his pardner, cussed mo' loud, An' said he knowed 'twere so; Gup .Bean reached out his big long arm An' snatched up Mulllns' tricks, Den Brickyard Sam, an' Wash an' Gup Got In some lovely licks. Den each man drawed his gun right quick, An' jumped behind his cheer; An' purty soon 'do room were full O' smoke lnstld o' air; I lit out thru a winder sash What wasn't riz at all. An' me, in' glass an' sash an' blind All jlned In in dc fall. De police come, an' lock'd de door An' sont do coroner; Who corned, a-smokln' o his pipe (He didn't live so fur). He fotch along some Jury men, " Who seed dey all were dead, f'- ' An' den sqt down an' writ a lot? t An' dls lswbat dey said: "Dls wrltln' witnesses dat Wash, , An' Coon, an' Sam an' Gup Come'd to ther death from nach'ul causes Playln' 'Seven Up.' " An den dey wrjt de census man t " " To change de 'rlg'nal score. By Jlst four niggers, mo or less, tJ Who wouldn't play no more. J. M. WADDILL. Dead Children. Deep In her eyes There li a look that does not live In any other woman's eyes. Nor in the eyes of any man. A wlstfulncss unsatisfied; ., A light that fades with years ' Yet never quite goes out; A light that warms " And makes her beautiful; A mother of dead children, she Has in her ees The pathos of earth's heritage Of loss; The pity and the pain. -William J. Lampton In New York Sun. A Slight Difference. Oh, my Jokes are very funny When I'm sending them away; I can' almost see the money That the editor will pay. But instead of being jolly Every note of fun they lack. And they're rather melancholy When my Jokes come back. New York Herald. demands upon my purse I caused replying to them. Inside of two weeks I received three more demands, but Ignored them all. Then he wired me, and I made no answer. " 'Send money quick. Am sick," he wired again. " 'With what? I telegraphed back. " 'With waiting for cash,' he answered, collect. "He got it. But I am going to have a talk with him when he gets back. It Is time that he was doing something else besides spending money." Detroit Free Press. She Got One Right Array. "No, I never have a bit of trouble with my husband," remarked the frail little woman with the Intelligent face. "In fact, I have him right under my thumb." "You don't look very strdng," doubt fully commented the engaged girl. "You mistako me, my dear. It's a men tal, not a physical, subjection." "Would you mind telling me how" "Not a bit! Always glad to help any one steer clear of the rocks. First of all, you must know that a man In love Is the biggest sort of a fool, and says things that make him almost wild when he hears 'em In after life. I realized It, and from tho very beginning of our courtship I kept a phonograph in the room, and every speech he made was duly recorded. Now, A HOT DEY Billy's Letter. They wrote me about yer marriage, I think it wuz Jimmy Lesrls, He says the groom Is a high-toned chap An' nothln a-tall like me; He says that you wuz as purty Well, o course he give you a puff, But If Jimmy had written twlct as much He couldn't said half enough. I'm wrltln to ask a favor, Nell, I want ou to let me keep The letters an' things you sent me When you wuz little Bo-I'eep An' me the loln shepherd lad, Bellevln yer heart wuz mine. In the days when the flowers wuz bloomln An the weather wuz ever fine. I know this ain't the proper thing For atelier like me to do; But they mean a awful lot to me An' they can't mean much to you. I've kept em, hopln to make my pile. An' when I got rich at last I'd uv gone to a Eastern college An p'r'aps but all that's past. I wanter keep yer letters. For they are my only books; Besides, they're too yeller to send you I've spoiled their original looks. I've read 'em over so often You'd never be able to tell That the blurred little line at the bottom reads: "Tours forever, Nell." I s'pose you ferglt the stickpin You give me one day wit' a klis, Sayln', "Billy, I made a proroloo Never to part wit' this Till I met the man I really loved " I'm wearin" it jest the same To remember the drunken greaser As once made free wit yer name. An' then, them kodak plcters. The ones wit the jacqueminot rose. Taken when you wuz glttln well. Dressed In yer rldln' clothes. Thej're gracln' the walls o my cabin, I christened It "Heaven" one day; Ah! wot would be left o' my heaven If the angels wuz taken away! So, leave em all to me, Nelly, The letters an plcters an' things. They're only the' broken feathers That fell from my wild dove's wings When she fluttered away from my bosom An flew to a softer nest; Yet they're all the world to a cowboy Buried out here In the "West. M. B. Klrby In New York Herald. A Family 3Iatter. She sewed a button on my coat, I watched the flnrcrs nimble; Sometimes I held her spool, of thread. And sometimes held her thimble. "I'm glad to do It, since you're far From sister and from mother; " Tls such a thing," she said, and smiled, "As I'd do for my brother." The fair head bent so close to me My heart was wildly beating; She seemed to feel my gaze, looked up. And then our glances meeting. She flushed a ruddy, rosy red. And I. I bent and klssad her, " 'Tis such a thing," I murmured low, "As I'd do to my sister." Brookljn. Life. Hanntcd. As I sit at fall of evening, Musing 'fore the open fire, 'Joying thoughts as light and flitting As the blazes of the pyre, Lo! appears to me a figure Standing In the flickering light, And I say in trembling accents, "Art thou come again tonight? Speak! who are thou? what thine errand?" Answer comes without delay: "I'm Jim Brown, the tailor's son, sir; Here's that bill. Pa wants his pay!" Detroit Free Press. -i whenever my husband gets u little bit ob streperous I just turn on a record or so. Heavens! How he does rave! But he can't deny It. They always will, though, if you don't have proof positive." "Thank you." gratefully murmured the engaged girl. "I'll get a phonograph this very day." London Tit-Bits. Let Her Itlnfr! A drama in one act. Characters A bell, a bell boy, another bell boy, and a man up stairs. Bell Ting-a-ling-llng. Bell boy There goes the belL It's your turn. Other bell boy Nothing of the sort. Go yourself. Bell boy I won't. Other bell boy Neither will I. Bell Tlng-tlng-tlng-a-llng-llng. Bell boy You had better go. Other bell boy It's your turn Bell boy My turn nothing. You had better chase yourself up stairs. Other bell boy You Just sit there and see how fast I will go. Bell Ting-a-llng-llng-tlng-tlng-a-llng!! Bell boy Let's play a game of euehre and see who goes. Other bell boy All right. Bell Ting-a-ling! tlng-tlng!! tlng-tlng-a ling-ting!!!!!! Very slow curtain. New York Herald. IN ALGIERS Love's Mcsiingc. When the dews of night have fallen, and the stars fond vigil keep. When the cares of day are over, and tho world Is hushed in sleep. Then I think of a Summer's gloaming be neath the tender sky. When we stood beside the, sea, dear Inve, and whispered our "good-bje." Tho' weary months have come and gene In changing restless scene. Fond thoughts of you still linger in the land of "Might-have-been": Tho brightest dreams hae passed away, and joy is dead to me. The sweetest memories in my life will ever cling to thee. Ob, Time may roll onward and seasoas may change, And this life with Its dreams fade away; But the heart that Is faithful, the love that is true, Will live on forever and aye, sweetheart. Will lle on forever and aye! I wander o'er the hills, dear heart; I hear the seagull's cry; The breezes softly sing to me a sad, sweet lullaby. The crested waves are sobbing as they mur mur on the shore "My fondest one, good-bye good-bye good-bye for evermore." And my heart Is full of sorrow, and my life Is full of pain. For I long to hoar your voice, dear love, and see our face azal Our lives are now divided, but jour spirit comes to me. And In the silence of the night I dream and think of thee. Oh, Time may roll onward, and seasons may change. And this life with Its areams fade away; But the heart that Is faithful, the loe that is true. Will live on forever and aje, sweetheart. Will live on forever and aye! Violet A. Griffith, in The Sketeh. By en By. Ef you des keep on a-hopln Dat de times Ml mend You boun' ter keteh de rainbow At de roun worl's "end. Den steady, Eii ready When de storm break In de sky; Steady. En ready, En jou'll reach home by en by! Ef you dos keep on a-gwlne En a-klvtrln' er de groun You boua' ter ketch de rainbow Wen de wort' tu'n roun'. Den steady. En ready Wen de light fall from de sky; Steady. En ready. En jou'll reach home by en by! Atlanta Constitution. Her Reward. I tell the cook just what to ooek And, how to cook It, though I feel her fixed. Indignant look As if she did not know! I rearrange with loving care. The table's furntehlnss, 'And lay some nxws, here and there, Among the spoons and things. Mj- rrtttiest waist I don, and dress My hair in dainty trim. Prizing my own attractiveness As offering Joy to him And then he comes' "Oh, hello dear! , Dead tired. Turn down that blaze. No letters? Any company here? Where 13 the dog'" he says. Madeline Bridges, In Life. Not Tom's Ring at AIL Was the othrr Fellow's, and It Was All So Very Sadden! j "You know Tom," began the girl phi losopher, twisting a new ring about hec third finger. "Yes," exclaimed the other two In chorus, "when is It to be?" "You know Tom," began the other again, who would tell things In her own way or not at all. "And you know there was a lire at our house. In which the old maiden lady on the third floor had her nose seri ously burned. What I am going to tell you Is related both to the fire and to Tom. "It was tho evening after, and I waa practicing at the piano, trying to appear as though I wab not awaiting him. For merly, when waiting for the man whom I was going to marry, I would have been reading a book. But they all seemed to see ough that. They knew very well that the book was a ruse, and that I waa just making up my mind what (to say after the first greeting. So I ceased read ing, and nowadays practice on the piano." "It is hard to know what to say after that first greeting," remarked the fluff -haired sirl. "Is it?" asked the sallow young woman Innocently. The Usnal Tiling. "Yes," replied the philosopher. "One 13 apt to grow red and look silly. Then he always says, 'Well, what are you laughing for?' and you always reply, 'Nothing at all,' and then you giggle. Ho laughs In little jerks, and asks how you are. You say 'All right. Hasn't It been a perfectly lovely day?' I used to get a book just be fore he came, and think out things to say during such trying moments, but now 1 play tho bumble-bee song, or something which Is not too noisy, for I always man age to hear every footfall on the veranda. That evening after the Are I wa3 sing ing" "What risks you take," ventured the ar low young woman. "So I failed to listen for the footsteps as usual," proceeded the speaker. "I had just reached a high note, and was endeav oring to get that vocal quiver that Is jo fetching, when soma one directly behind my chair coughed slightly. It was so. sudden that I forgot all about the line of action I had planned. I "had Intended to be cool to him, for, you see, I vaa most er cordial the evening before. You should, never be too cordial to a man twice In succession, you know." "I know," answered the fluffy-haired girl, with a conclusive nod. Awfully Sudden. "But It was awfully sudden," said tho sallow joung woman. "Did you mistake him for a book agent?" "No such good luck, or good behavior, cither," admitted the philosopher. "I just said, 'Oh, Tom!' and I am afraid I left some of my new powder on his coat. Ha seemed to be about as surprised as I, for he backed away several steps, and, remov ing my hands gently from his shoulder, remarked, 'I am afraid you are mis taken.' " "What!" exclaimed the listeners. The philosopher nodded vigorously an'l bit her lip a though she was about to laugh or cry."It wasn't Tom at all," she finally gasped weakly, "but an accident insurance man who had come to see about the maiden lady's burned nose. The maid answered the door, you know." "What did you say?" Inquired the fluffy-haired girl. "1 must nave stammered a little, but I remember saying that I thought he was some one else." "And he?" "He said he wished he were." "Impudence!" ejaculated the sallow joung woman. "You really should tell Tom at once, for as long as you are wear ing his ring" T'other Fellow's. "But It to not his ring," said the philos opher, defiantly holding up her hand; "it's the accident Insurance man's." Her companions looked at each other in speechless surprise; the fluffy-haired girl finally managed to Inquire: "When?" "Since one week after he came out to Inquire about the injuries of the maiae- lady. Wasn't she a dear to poke her noso Into the lire?" Chicago News. TMnry of n Toothnll Player. October 19. We defeated Wilmington College, 17 to 0. Great game. Neither side scored In the first half, and It looked tick lish. Their full-tack was fine, but finally we managed to break both his legs, and that evened things up. Five minutes af ter the second half began we landed, tho ball on their six-yard line. I was given the ball for a tandem against tackle. Their guard grabbd me by one foot and stopped me. The ball was still a foot from the line, and It was the fourth down. Our center and full grabbed me and stretched my leg until the ball was over the line. Thought sure I would have to quit, as ono leg was a foot longer than the other, but the coaches stretched my other leg to fit and I could run 100 yards two seconds fas ter than ever, owing to increased stride. I ran forty yards for a touchdown a few minutes later. Had a funny accident. Had my teeth sharpened for the game so I could hold in the line without being seen. In the first half I tried to fasten, my teeth In the end's leg and hold him. Got them, tangled In the padding of his trousers, and when he started to run he pulled an even dozen. Then, having disarmed me, he bit one of my ears off. I call that taking un fair advantage. Team came through tho game In fine condition. No one hurt. R. H. Back in Chicago Tribune. Had Canxc to Be Alarmed. "Woman, overboard!" There was immediately a great commo tion on deck. The husband rushed franti cally about, tearing his hair, wringing hl3 hands, and crying beseechingly: "Oh save her save her! She is my wife!" The noble sailors thought of their own dear ones at home, and risked their lives to gave the woman. They succeeded, and took her to the cabin of the swooning husband, whose look of gratitude fully re paid them for their efforts. A few moments later he recovered, thrust his hand into his wife's pocket, pulldd out a heavy purse, and, with evi dent relief, said: "Look here, old woman! Next time you want to lean over the ship's side, let ma hold that purse. You scared me almost to death! 'Answers.