24 "
THE SUNDAY OBEGONIAN,- PORTLAND, -AUGUST 19, 1900.
t. 7 you bathe In it, you 'will live forever, was gone. She called sharply and rushed y field. Suddenly from the neighboring Jg I f
W Uh V "v T) saia .pn. it woman i oe an iun ra of the thunderlng traln. We heard the . JiZmLk'W PST? Strokes as Well as Firemen. ?TOS f flMr7
UQ-U -Ov w "l" """V"" , -""" fa" quick reversing of the engine, but we V?HyF -S, . aSr- "If there is any animal that knows n V,' .
l&WX i'tffSTiSint" ffSr 3J.S "" - more than a horse remarked a member WL
MBVIM K 1 tr and .ee the fountain STk 2 tffnSffidS-S'tS . , , of Wa.hlngton, (D. O) fl depart. 7?
Vmr anK fweotnkf r?a,nd --A"rS JSfffLSC - I J, 2 iST. 11 S LTtl AL (fiS. A
' l II JOsn. ,i .i. . nni r..ina v 1 ill . T TriAan onA that knows more than a "ZfuP X
He a. Pnnny Little Boy.
X know a funny little boy,
"Who, very stranro to say.
Speaks often topfilflo, upside down
Juvi. Insldo out. this -Ray:
'0 Donald, when did Israel Put
So many redcoats kill?
You know that battle, 1 am cure:
Twas fought on Hunker Bill."
Or "Donald. I must track ray punk!
Mamma, cars X can so
With you to where the ocean is
Vher crabblcs tlto 3 our boe.
"The seasbore is a lovely place.
And sand forts are tsuch fun.
I like to play tac with the waves.
And from the rurf to sun.
"The- woard balk by the beach Is ve-
Ry, very, very lone.
Somotimes I think that It must cad
In iloonland; but that's wrong."
Some day I'll stand the little boy
Illcht on his curly head.
And thon, maybe, his downside words
Will stand etraiuht up Instead.
New Tork Herald.
TO CENTER OF THE EARTH
End of the "Wonderful Adventures
of Inventor Josli and Ills Dnrlns
Chums, Eph and Snooks.
CHAPTER IIL
There was a tug-of-war In progress
down, down, far below us. In the center
of the earth. The participants, as you
know, children, from the preceding chap
ter, were Eph, Snooks, Josh and the hide
ous giant, Volcan.
Let go; you're pulling mo In two!"
screamed Josh.
Volcan had taken a fresh hold on Josh's
log, and Eph and Snooks, determined not
to give "up, renewed their efforts to save
their companion. It began to look as
though Josh would be pulled In two, when
Eph and Snooks finally had to let go and
Josh and Volcan rolled over In a heap
together. Volcan quickly regained his
feet, however, and, catching Josh by bis
coat collar, dropped him into his pocket
and strode away.
The two terror-stricken lads sat in the
door of the boring machine, watching
the disappearance of Josh, and not know
ing what to do.
"we're In an awful fix, Eph," remarked
Snooks.
""Had we hotter go up and get helpr
Eph asked.
"No; I don't think so. "We'll not leavo
Josb at the mercy of Volcan. Iiet's follow
them, only we needn't get too close, you
Irnow." answered Snooks.
Volcan and Josh.
So It was agreed, and they started In
the direction taken by the giant. They
bad not gono far, when, to their astou
lshmont, they came upon Volcan, seated
upon a rock, with Josh close beside him.
"Well, look at that!" exclaimed Snooks.
"Josh is talking to the giant, and they
ccem to be the best of friends, don't
they?" said Eph.
"ilaybe he won't hurt us either. Comp
onl I'm going to slip up and see," said
finooks.
Then they stole out from behind tht
ledge of rook where they had hidden and
crept near.
Josh, in tho midst of a lively description
of how they camo to be at the center of
tho earth, saw them and paused.
"Hello, fellows!" he called. "Come heroi
Volcan wants to talk to you. He's tho
best giant I evor saw."
With that Eph and Snooks walked up
boldly nnd eat down beside Josh. Volcan
eyed them curiously and said:
"Tou are afraid of me, aren't you. ladB?
VTcll. you needn't bo. for I shall do yo
jio harm; Tra glad to have this oppor
tunity to talk to you."
Tnie was spoken In English, which
language, it seems, the giant had ac
quired from some English sailors who
had been dropped, with their ship,
through a crack in the ocean bed, during
a dreadful earthquake, some hundreds of
years ago, and had been carried to the
center of the earth, -where they wcro
c impelled to pass the remaining years ot
their lives.
A Good-Yntnrotl Giant.
Imagine such a giant, children! One that
"eras good to people and liked to talk with
thrm. He was bettor behaved than bo
looked.
Som the boys and the giant were
friends, and then Volcan took the young
explorers on &a exploring tour through
the wonderful places about them. They
saw the great caverns of the earth and
the Bources of volcanic eruption which
were seething, boiling masses of molten
rocK and minerals. Volcan showed them
how earthquakes were made. He blew
his riery breath upward and a crack ap
peared In the crust of tne earth. This
was accompanied by much rumbling.
They pabfd through deep canyons, near
one of which was a great storehouse
filled with gold and precious stones,
such as the lade had never dreamed of
lefore. All the while, Volcan talked In
a most entertaining manner, and the boys
learned much about the hidden treasures
of the earth from Wm. They found that
the center of the earth Is honeycombed
with galleries that fairly gleam and glit
ter with precious metals. Allies and
miles of theeo g&llerl&s, with lofty roofs,
canopied over with gleaming metal, were
traversed. Countless gems flashed in the
light of the fires that burned constantly
everywhere. No boys ever saw such
splendor slace the world began. The in
terior of the world was wonderful.
Finally, however, the lads began to talk
about going home, bat Volcan urged them
to stay, saying:
Thore Is one thing you haven't seen
yet. and you must not return before you
do."
"What Is it?" Inquired the lads. '
"It is the four.ta!n of lvlng water. If j
you bathe in it, you will live forever,
and If you drink of it, you will become
giants like myself. I want you to take
a drink and bathe In It, then you can
live forever with me here in the center
of the earth. How would you like that?"
"Oh, let's not," urged Snooks, when
Josh, who always enjoyed experiments,
appeared to be in favor of the plan.
"No; I don't want to be a giant. Josh,"
said Eph. "It wouldn't be any fun to
llvo down here forever; we couldn't get
out, you know, as we would be too big
to get inside the boring machine," he
added.
"Well, let's go and eee the fountain,
anyhow. If we don't drink of It," said
Josh.
"Come then," said Volcan, starting
down a path of white marble. When they
had traveled about an hour, there ap
peared before them a most beautiful lake.
Diamonds were imbedded in the edge,
and they sparkled In the water which
was clear as crystals. A fragrance as
sweet as that of the violet rose from the
shining water, while above it hung a
misty cloud of brightly variegated colore.
It was a picture for a painter, and the
Tys gazed in silent admiration at the
wonderful scene.
Volcan said nothing, and, at last, Eph
broke tho silence.
Eph's Suggestion.
"Boys." he said, "it wouldn't be bad,
after all, to live forever; I'd rather enjoy
It. Let's bathe, but we musn't drink the
water, for we don't want to be giants."
The lake looked so inviting that the
others agreed and the lads thereupon dis
robed and plunged in for a fine swim.
Volcan urged them repeatedly to drink
of the water,, but thy refused, as they
were very well satisfied with their pres
ent size. Whether they will live forever
remains to be seen-
When they came out, each boy declared
that he felt younger, though I think ho
only Imagined it.
They were ready now to go home,
but decided to wait until the giant was
asleep, as they feared he might attempt
to keep them there by force. So that
night, while Volcan slumbered, they
sneaked away, got inside the boring ma
chine and soon reached the earth's sur
face. They had spent three days and
nights inside the earth, and it was a
great relief to them to get into their
accustomed atmosphere again.
So. my dear children, when there Is an
earthquake or volcanic eruption, you may
know that the big giant Volcan, in the
middle of this globe, is mad about some
thing. ALICE 3L WELLS.
(The end )
"TWO-FOR-A-XICKEI&."
Vlllajre Lad, Scorned by Comrades,
Redeems Himself Nobly.
"Two-for-a-Nickel" was a boy of per
haps 1G, loose-jointed and thin, with a
sallow face, washed-out blue eyes and an
air of llstlessness, all of which made him
an object of contempt and derision among
his comrades. This name, bestowed by
the other boys, was gradually shortened
Into Two-for, and finally into the mono
syllable Two.
"I do not think," says a writer in the
Cleveland Plain Dealer, "the boys ever
really maltreated Two. No one but those
of genuine brutal Instincts could have
done so, and I do not now recall any act
of cruelty. Of course, we made game of
him unmercifully. In fact, I believe we
tolerated him when we went to the river
I giants like myself. I -want you to take nowhere to be found. Every one had seen l? Jra. L9LJB st kW?v VMfe. as && mm "field and began a regular May dance, I V HBBL
7 live forever with me here In the center tlced It leaving. .JkjSS VWetH.ll'nf ' ViSV Wtf W lw circle, then dancing around and around MiHswiMMBr
s Josh, who always enjoyed experiments, from bph.nfl somfi .mntv barrel at the f' tMoWhv, "-ife WJMiSm. ?? J V- this iiotisr could COUNT. J5S9HKW
or to the woods for no other purpose.
"He bore it all patiently. Perhaps it
was generally believed that his feelings
were not easily touched, just as we be
lieve or pretend to believe that the hook
does not hurt the fish.
"Unto Two-for-a-Nlckel the dally com
ing of the passenger train was a source
of everlasting delight. Now and theq
some of the other boys were absent. Two
never was. He would get up by the en
gine and watch the hissing valves, the
great, red furnace as the firemen shoveled
in coal, the ponderous wheels and the
powerful piston rod with an Interest that
never flagged and which he accorded to
no other object.
"One Summer morning the platform of '
WENT IN
g mm . 1 1 11 mm Cg r a .,
3Ir. Bne-Br-r-r-erl! My but this wafer's cold. I'll never jso svrlm
xnlnsr o early In the season again!-Now York World.
the station was crowded. The boys were
on hand In full force. I did not seo Two
in the crowd, but I knew he must be
there if he were alive,
"Among those who were going away
were a young woman and two children,
one a baby in her arms snd the other a
little girl of perhaps S years. The mother
was rather a nervous woman and was
worried about the checking of her bag
gase, which the agent attended to very
lelsurely, handing her the checks just as
the train rounded the curve. Then sud
denly, she discovered that tha Uttlj 2irl
was gone. She called sharply and rushed
about among the crowd. The child was
nowhere to be found. Every one had seen
it a moment before, but no one had no
ticed It leaving.
"The train was within 50 yards of the
platform. At that moment there crept,
from behind some empty barrels at the
farther end, tho little girl, out into the
center of the track, not 30 yards In front
of the thundering train. We heard the
quick reversing of the engine, but we
knew It was too late. Some turned their
heads. The mother fainted. Then all at
once a tall, thin figure darted across the
end of the platform straight toward the
unconscious child, tossing it with a quick
motion far Into the weeds and nettles be
yond the track. It was saved, but under
the mlghtly wheels, utterly worthless in
deed now, there lay all that was mortal
of him whom tho boys had scorned and
in their mockery had christened Two-for-a-Nlckel."
THINGS CHILDREN SAY AND DO.
Insrenlons Whimsicalities of Bnsy
Paragraphic Scribes.
Teacher Now, Tommy, give me a sen
tence, and then we'll change it to tho
imperative form.
Tommy The horse draws the wagon.
Teacher Now put it in the imperative.
Tommy Gee-up. St. Louis Globe-Democrat.
"That's a terrible noise In the nursery,
Mollle," said tho mistress. "What's the
matter? Can't you keep the baby quiet?"
"Shure, ma'am," replied Mollle, "I can't
keep him quiet, unless I let him make a
noise." Exchange.
Teacher In the sentence, "Patrick beat
John with his fists," what is Patrick?
Bright Boy Ho's Irish. Philadelphia
Press.
"Don't you think his nose will be like
his father's In time?"
"I don't know. It takes something be
sides time to produce a nose like his
father's." Cleveland Plain Dealer.
In a lesson on the animal kingdom the
teacher put the following question:
"Can any boy name to mo an animal of
the order lndentata; that is, a toothless
animal?"
A boy whoso face beamed with pleasure
at the prospect of a good mark replied:
"I can."
"Well, what is tho animal?"
"My grandmother!" replied the boy, In
great glee. Exchange.
A little girl was 9 years old a few days
ago, and among the presents, was a beau
tiful Bible from her auntie.
After the exciting events of the day
were over, the lady who presented the
book called to find out how It had been
received.
"Yes' said Katherlne, "It's a beauti
ful book."
It a moment before, but no one had no- -ifiMmM9wr arf m. 171TB Vise H3iV f&. M taking hold of hands and forming a largo y smSFHm f
"The train was within 50 yards of the stjM I tar-, lflP 3- &&G' JST g. .- ana chattering gleefully." rSSSiemKMKI I
"I am so glad you like it," her aunt
replied.
"It must have cost a good deal, too."
"It was rather expensive."
"And I have three other Bibles. They
are all alike Inside, aren't they? And
this Is just the same as the rest, except
the binding, isn't it?"
"Yes, dear."
"Well, It seems to me you might have
done better with all the money you had
to pay for it if you had bought me a
pup." Chicago Times-Herald.
"I never tell my boy that I won't take
him to tho circus if he isn't good," re
marked the candid man.
"Why not?"
"I don't care to take any chances. I'm
tired of worrying for fear he'll do some
thing that'll keep the whole family home."
San Francisco Examiner.
Tommle (seating himself with apparent
discomfort after a slipper tattoo) Ma,
you've often talked to me about being
TOO SOON.
brave, but I don't think you're bravo
yourself.
Ma Why do you say that, Tommic?
Tommle 'Cause I've always been taught
to believe It was cowardly to hit a fellow
behind his back. Boston Courier,
The mother of a little 3-year-old had
been away from home over night, and on
her return asked:
"And how did my little girl get to
sleep last night without mamma?"
"Oh," she replied, "papa, twied to sing
to me like ou does, an I des went to
aP " r-T "yTrf jftygfeSlls Ss5i- Knew Number of Flrc-AIarin Bl WeKf
On the bank a-slttin',
Fishln' and a-smokln,'
Flghtln' pesky hornets,
Woodchuck holes a-pokln.
Eatln' stolen moshey pie,
Gettln' torpid liver.
Wish I was a boy again.
Down along the river.
sleep weal twlck, so I touldn't hear him."
Philadelphia Inquirer.
"My boy," said the first proud papa,
"has a bad habit of interrupting me when
I'm talking. Your kid isn't Old enough
for that yet."
"No," replied the other, "my boy con
tents himself with Interrupting me when
I'm sleeping." Philadelphia Press.
"Who broke the moon?" cried 2-year-old
Alice, on seeing the new moon for
the first time. Little Tom, however,
looked at it in another light; at his
first sight, with great disdain, he saldJ
"That just tried to be a moon." New
Tork Tribune.
BATHING CHUMS.
New York Dogs Take a Dally Plunge
In the River ToffetUer.
In ono of the blocks In Amsterdam
avenue. New York, says the Sun of that
city, not to be exact, somewhere above
the Seventies, ore an undertaker's rooms
and a saloon. A dog belongs to each.
The undertaker's dog is a spaniel; that
of the saloon man Is of a breed not yet
known. Some one who has made a
study of dogology and of these "twa
dogs" in particular vouches for what fol
lows. For more than a year there has been
a noticeable friendship between the un
dertaker's and the saloon dog. The dis
tance from the block In which tho dogs
live to the foot of a certain street which
runs down to North River Is about three
blocks. Last summer the saloon dog
found his way to the river and once every
day, sometimes oftener, this dog went
to the river and bathed. He did this
with such regularity that he soon became
known to the laborers about the dock.
This summer he resumed his river baths.
Soon after the season began he took a
companion, the undertaker's dog, and
they go to the river dally for their plunge
and seem to enjoy it like boys. ti
After the story was told it was de
cided to put the Intelligence of the dogs
to a test. One day the undertaker shut
his dog in the back room. The saloon
dog waited about his corner for Bom6
time, looking for his companion, who on
this occasion was like the letter in the
old minstrel song. After a long wait tha
saloon dog trotted down to the undertak
er's and looked In at the door. Falling
to see his chuni, he sat down and waited.
The undertaker's dog was still kept in,
and the saloon dog" went back to his cor
ner and stretched htmself. Later in
the day the undertaker's dog was re
leased and went on a run to tho saloon.
Tho meeting was Hk6 that of two mates
who had been separated, and after an
interchange" of wags the two trotted
down to the river and indulged In their
plunge.
PARADISE! FOB. MONXtEYS.
Experiences ot An Indian Traveler
Among the Simians.
"When I was traveling In Northern In
dia," said a gentleman who bad recentlj
completed a journey around the world
"I was constantly Impressed with the al
most human ways of the monkeys there.
You see, they are never molested, which
is also true of the birds, and they are
as tame and Impudent as spoiled children.
"I remember that one morning while
1
Hear the frogd a-croakln',
Katydids a-huramln'.
Hear tho tinkle, tinkle,
Lowing herds a-comln;
Watch busy bumble-bses
In the mullen. quiver.
Wish I was a boy again
Down along the river.
,
,00-,
-r ft"
-, 1 4
Hear my mother callln,
Cattle need a-mllkln. -
Hldln' In the hay loft,
Other chores a-bllkin',
See my dad a-comin',
Used to beg and shiver.
Glad I ain't a boy again
Down along the river.
GEORGE R. BRILL.
we were sitting at breakfast on the ve
randa of our hotel suddenly we heard the
noisiest chattering, and down the main
street of the town came a crowd of long
tailed monkeys, running ft race evidently.
They shrieked and chattered at every
leap, tripped each other up, pulled each
other's talis and seemed to be having a
generally hilarious time. While we -left
the table to watch their antics, some
Indiah crows that had been solemnly
lined up on the veranda rail watcihlng U3
eat, made a dash for the food and had
quite a fight with the native servant bo
fore they were finally driven away.
"The monkeys of India are surely the
most Irresponsible people In the world,''
continued the traveler. "I can call them
people because they are such ludicrous
counterfeits of human beings. In many
of the old temples there are monkey
settlements. I remember one In partic
ular, which was sacred to the simians.
There seemed to be thousands of the
creatures, and I was told that 5000 had
recently been taken to the woods to get
LUCKY IT'S
Mother Centipede Tou' II have to go barefo
money to buy shoes for you.
rid of them. But in this temple I saw lit
tle simian mothers nestling and rocking
their babies in their arms for all the
world like a Christian mother. I ven
tured to pick up one of the infantH that
was running about, and instantly the
baby gave a typical infantile squeal and
the excited mother came to me, chatter
ing angrily. I put the infant down, and
the mother, her eyes still blazing with
anger, carried the little one to a corner
and petted and rocked it, frequently
turning to give me a scornful look.
"It Is not uncommon for the monkeys
in the trees to reach down and seize the
traveler's hat as he passes.
"Perhaps the most remarkable sight in
connection with the monkeys in India I
witnessed early one morning. We were
riding in the highway and by a vacant
Wkk
IflSEm II J
&&S TZ-Sl2&
Knew Number of Fire-Alarm
Strokes as Well as Firemen.
"If there Is any animal that knows
more than a horse," remarked a member
of tho Washington, (D. C.) fire depart
ment, to a reporter of the Star, of that
city, the other day, "I'd like to see it.
I mean one that know3 more than a
smart horse, for there are fool horses as
well as tool people and once In a while
we get one of these fool horses in the
fire department. But I will say that our
horses as a rule are pretty smart and
knowing.
"I remember ono we had in this com
pany some years ago that actually could
count. George was his name, if I re
member rightly, and George was one
of those horses that never did any more
work than he was obliged to. Not that
he couldn't, but just because, like some
people you run across, he was opposed
to looking for work. Well, every com
pany in the fire department has a cer
tain district to cover on first alarms.
That is, every company responds to cer
tain boxes on the first alarm, and
doesn't go to others except on special
or general alarms.
"Well. sir. we didn't have George many
months before that horse came to know
our district just as well as any of the
men. He knew the boxes we went out to
on the first alarm, and it Is a fact that
that horse got so that he'd wait and
count the first round before he'd budge
out of his stall. If the box was not in
our district, George would walk leisurely
to his place, but If It was one we were
due at on the first alarm he would rush
down to his place. In those days we had
to bitch up on every alarm that came
in, whether it was in our district or
not, and stand hitched for 15 or 20 min
utes. George knew this, of course, and
that was . why he would always take
his time going to his place when the box
wasn't In our district. And It's a fact
that if he was eating when an outside
box came in, he'd Just keep on eating
until the foreman yelled out to bring him
down to his place.
"Of ocurse, now and then, George
would miscount the box, and rush to his
place on a box not in our district. But
when he did make a mistake like that,
which was precious seldom, that horse
would get so mad and feel so bad about
It that he wouldn't get over it for a
day or so."
CAUGHT A HAIRY MONSTER.
Queer Find of WUistlIn& Spider y
a. Massachusetts Man.
H. A. Peters, of East Brookfield, Mass.,
recently captured an Immense spider of
unknown species. When Mr. Peters first
saw the spider, which was making a bee
line over the public highway for East
Brookfield, he was so amazed at the sight
that he rubbed both eyes several times
before he could realize that the monster
was a reality.
Then, hastily grasping an empty glass
milk jar, Peters jumped from the wagon
and was about to make the stranger a
prisoner, when he was startled by a dis
tinctly audible whistle, emanating from
the Insect.
Instantly a flock of minute facsimiles
of tho peculiar spider came rushing from
all directions, clambered up the legs of
the big spider and hid themselves in
the fuzzy hair On Its back. This was
more than Peters could stand, especially
as, after securing her young, Mrs. Spider
assumed a defensive attitude. He thrust
the mouth of the jar over the whole
family of spiders and made them prison
ers. Hundreds have since viewed the
monster and its offspring, and all are
puzzled.
The body of the large spider is one and
one-half Inches In length. The body Is
black and is supported by eight powerful
legs, each two inches long; The head
Is supplied with powerful-looking jaws,
from which two feelers one-half Inch In
length protrude. Tbe beady eyes oro Jet
black.
Bright Little Wu.
Little Wu, son of the Chinese Minister
is always at the very head of his classy
SUMMER.
oted, children; your father hasn't made enough
wherein he is the youngest pupil, and
last month the report which was given
him to take home could not possibly have
been more excellent, for he had gotten a
mark of 100 In every branch. After sign
ing this report, the man Wu wrote on
Its margin: T hope my son will improve."
Recently a. fair was held at the school
for the benefit of a hospital. Little Wu,
with his pigtail and beautiful silken gar
ments. Is, of course, a favorite of the
ladies, and one of the masters sold. In
discussing the plans of the fair: "We'll
put you, Wu, behind the counter of the
pickle booth. Then the girls will. Indeed,
torment you." Wu sneered In the pater
nal manner and answered: "Then I will
be in a pickle!" This pun, for a Celectial
of 12 years, was considered not half bad;
soya the Philadelphia Record.
She Gave a- Reason.
The stub-tailed hen she laid an ess.
And straightway roado a mighty atlr.
(Sho laid it In an old nail kes
The farmer had prepared for her.)
The ducks and geeso and turkeys they
All gathered round that they might seo
What made that hen so blithe and zay
Thy did not quite approve- her glee.
Ono fowf said sternly, "There's no causa
For this indecorous outcry;
You simply follow naturo'3 law3 '
And cannot tell the reason why.
"You camo to lay that tgs down thero."
Tho hen retorted with a frown,
"I could not stand it anywhere,
And that is why I laid it down."
Chicago Record.
HE PRESERVED HIS LIVER
But In Doing So, Mr. Monkey CausciS
Mr. Fish to Receive a. Beating
That Broke His Bones.
Once upon a time there was a King In
Dragonland who had a beautiful wife, and
this beautiful wife fell ill. All the emi
nent doctors In tho kingdom were called
in turn to the palace, but not one of
them could think of anything to make the
Queen well and strong.
But one night she had a dream, and
when she awoke she sent for the King
and said:
"The remedy that will restore me to
health has been revealed to me, and it Is
this: I must have the liver of a young
monkey to eat."
"But. my dear," said the King, "there
is not a monkey on this side of tho
world, and how are we to send away
across the water to the other side and
bring one here? I am sure I don't know."
But the Queen wailed and cried until a
big round fish, with a great bony back,
heard her, and was so moved with pity,
that he got out of the water, and flopped
all the way to the palace to have an au
dience with the King. This ended in tho
King starting the big fish to swim across
the ocean to Monkeyland, where ho ar
rived in due coursa of time. On the
strand he met the object of his search.
"Good morning, Mr. Monkey," said tho
fish politely.
"Good morning. Mr. Fish," answered!
the monkey, making a profound bow. "Id
there anything I can do for you?"
Mr. Fish Explains.
"Well, yes," said the fish, "there Is a
great favor that you can do me. My mis
tress, the Queen of Dragonland. ha3
dreamed that she cannot live unless ono
of your tribe is' willing to cross the sea
and pay her tribute. But you won't re
gret the trip; It is a beautiful country,
full of palms and cocoanut trees and
oranges and figs. Why, a monkey would
not have to climb for fruit; it would Just
fall down upon him In showers as thiclc
as plum-blossom petals!"
"And how is ono to get to this beauti
ful land?" said tho monkey.
"Why," said the fish, "all you would
havo to do would be to sit astride my
back, and I would take you thero In a
Jiffy."
So the monkey agreed and off they
went. After they had been sailing Bev-
eral hours tho monkey said:
"Oh, by the way. Mr. Fish, why is It
that the Queen is so anxious to have a
monkey for a guest?" J -(
"Oh. didn't I tell ifoit '"Bald" the fish la
as innocent a tone as he could command,
"she wants to cut out your liver and
eat it."
There was silence for awhile, and then
the monkey spoke again:
"Mr. Fish," said he, "do you know T.
have-left my liver hanging to the top of
a tree. You should have told me at first
what the Queen wanted with me. Livers
are rather disagreeable things to always
carry around with a body, and I generally
take mine out and leave it airing when I
am going away to dinner. I was Just on
my way to dine with a friend when you
invited me to go with you to tho Dragon
Kingdom."
Necessary to Go Back.
"Now, my dear fellow, continued Mr.
Monkey, "there is nothing to be done but
for you and me to go back andget that
liver, for I would not disappoint Her
Majesty for anything in the world.
So the big fish, with a sigh, turned
back, and when they reached Monkeyland
the monkey sprang: ashore and climbed
a tree. Then he called down to tho fish:
"My friend, whllo we were taking our
little sail someono made off with my
liver, and since that is what tho Queen
wanted me for, there is really no use la
my going. Good-bye, some other time,
Mr. Fish."
And so the big fl3h made his way sor
rowfully home to the Dragon Kingdom,,
and to the palace of the King, and when
the King heard his story he was so angry
that he called to a servant and said:
"Take this idiot out to the waterside,
and when you have reached the sand, put
him down and beat him with all your,
might and main."
And as the King commanded so they
did, and they beat, and beat, and beat
the big fish until every bone in his body
was broken, and then they threw him
into the sea, where he has been a Jelly
fish ever since. Philadelphia Inquirer.
Another Infant Prodigy.
Little Viola Oelrich, of Council Bluffy
la., is the smartest little girl in the!
world, according to reports from her en
thusiastlc friends. She can. It is said,
operate a typewriter; she can earn 575 a
week on the stage; she's a mathemati
cian; she knows all the forms of geomet
ry; reads and 3peaks English, French and
German: reads the newspapers; can read
handwriting: knows the names of tho
principal cities, countries, lake3 and
rivers.
And, adds the teller of the tale, with,
the air of one who expects to be he
lleved, she Is only 3 years old.