JW,W'fSj.'3Fi. ?i5
THE SUNDAY OEEGONIAN, PORTLAND, JANUARY 14, 1900.
21
jrW8
The Ensrlin Lunjruase.
We'll begin -with a box, and the plural Is boxes.
But the plural of ox should be oxen, not oxes;
Then one fowl is goose, but two are called
geese,
Yet the plural of. mouse should never be meese;
You mty find a lone mouse, or a whole nest of
mice.
Bat the plural of house is houses, not hlce;
If the plural of man la always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen.
The cow In the plural may be cow or June,
But a cow If repeated Is never called kins,
And the ploral of vow is vows. never vine;
And if I speak of a foot and you show me your
feet, . . ,
And 2 lve you a boot, would a pair be called
beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called
beeth?
If the singular's this and the plural Is these.
Should the plural of Hiss be nicknamed keese?
Then one may be that and three would ba
those,
Tet hat in the plural would never be hose;
And the plural of cat Is cats, not ccse.
We speak of a brother and also of brethren.
But though we say mother we never say meth-
rcn;
Then masculine pronouns are he, nis and him.
But imagine the feminine, she. shls and shim.
Bo the English. I think you all will agree,
la the dod rottest language you ever did see.
Cheyenne Sun-Leader.
THE LIFE BEYOND DEATH
Dr. Minot J. Savage Holds That In
dividuality Is the Same in the
Next "World as in This.
No problem has more interest for man
kind than thai epitomized in tho question
asked centuries ago: "If a man die
shall he live again?" Men say be ready
to be classed as agnostics on most mat
ters of religion, but every man must have
an opinion concerning this question.
And herein, perhaps, lies the strongest
argument in favor of life beyond death,
for every man believes, not merely hopes,
that there is a future life. But this be
lief is not universally based upon the
same grounds. The orthodox Christian
believes it to be the gift of God through
the atoning sacrifice of Christ. Others
seek a scientific demonstration. To the
former class, Dr. Minot J. Savage's book,
".Life Beyond Death," will not appeal, but
to the latter group it will be welcomed
as a valuable contribution to the knowl
edge on thls great question.
After a review of tho beliefs held in the
past concerning life beyond death, Dr.
Savage takes up the present conditions
of belief and considers the agnostic reac
tion from the extreme "other worldli
ness," which it replaced, which was In
turn followed by the spiritualistic reac
tion against agnosticism. He points out
the doubts concerning the doctrine of im
mortality held by the churches and the
weakness of the traditional creeds and the
loosening of their hold upon people. He
then considers the probabilities of a fu
ture life. The volume includes a consid
eration of tho work of the Society of
Psychical Research and an appendix giv
ing some of the author's personal experi
ences in this line. Dr. Savase holds, as
a provisional hypothesis, that continued
existence is demonstrated, and that there
have been at least some well-authenticated
communications from persons in the other
life.
Dr. Savage believes we have distorted
all our ideas of the other life by our theo
log.cal speculations, and by supposing that
death is a line, tho moment we havo
crossed, It our destiny is fixed, and we are
either angels or devils forever. He does
not believe that we change when we die.
"We carry with us," he says, "our memo
ry of what we have been, and who have
been our friends, and those most closely
associated with ns." Ke sees nothing in
the fact of dying that should make any
marked change in one any more than a
man's going to sleep at night and wak
ing up in the morning makes another kind
of being of him. (G. P. Putnam's Sons,
New York.)
MISB XORA 1TKSB.
Yonnc Ensrlisli Authoress "Who
Wrote "The Priest's Marriage."
Miss Nora Yynne, whose latest novel,
"The Priest's Marriage," G. P. Put
nam's Sons, of New York, will bring out
this menth, is a young English author
whose earlier works, published in Xrondon,
have already attracted some attention.
Miss Tynne's books include "The Blind
Artist's Pictures," a volume of short
stories; "A Comedy of Honor," "Honey of
Aloes," "A Man and His Womankind,"
"Tho Story of a Fool and His Folly."
"The Priest's Marriage" tells the story
of a Catholic priest who loves and mar
ries a gentle English girl, and whoso sub
sequent life is a battle between his- love
and his religious convictions. The book
presents an Interestmg group of minor
characters, who talk cleverly and contrive
to utter some charming, if slightly cyni
cal, views on various subjects of moment.
Besides her hook work. Miss "Vynne is a
regular contributor to the Pall Mall Mag
azine, Sketch, Black and White and other
conspicuous London per.odicals. She is a
prominent member of the Writers' Club,
an institution where many Americans
havo been made welcome when in Lon
don. The portrait of Miss "Vynne is a
reproduction of a painting by a well
known London artist, and was exhibited
at the Royal academy two years ago.
Rcnan's "St. Paxil."
Perhaps St Paul is the best of Ernest
Renan's studies in religious history. Cer
tainly In none other of them Is the Eng
lish reader permitted to enjoy to tho full
the peculiar genius of the great philo
sophical historian, free from persistent re
minder that he is reading translation, as
he is permitted in this volume, with Mr.
IngersoU Lockwood's translation. The
marvelous distinctness of the figure of St.
Paul, in that respect unique among Bib
lical characters, and tho fascinating in
terest with which the great Frenchman
has framed his narrative, largely due, of
course, or at least made possible, by the
fact that the sources of available knowl
edge of St. Paul are more recent In form
end mere historical in nature than any
thing else in the Bible. Legend has been
busy with Jesus and Peter, John and
James: bat the eclipse Paul underwent in
ecclesiastical circles from the third cent
ury to the middle ages spared his own
compositions, and left the accounts of his
labors substantially as they were written
in the time of his life or at any rate by
active participants in the scenes narrated.
No historical writing bears stronger evi
dence of actual contemporaneous nar
rative than the circumstantial ac
counts we have of Paul's Jour
neyings. No composition bears more
indisDutable marks of authenticity
than Paul's epistle to the Galatlans. Of
almost equal authenticity are the two epls-
j ties to the Corinthians and the epistle
to the Romans, though the last bears
marks of a, circular letter designed for
"wide use. M. Kenan concludes, from the
salutations addressed to persons in dif
ferent places, that the main body of the
epistle la encyclical, and the various salu
tations appended to Individual copies sent
to different churches have been preserved
in a bunch by copyists at the end of the
epistle. Objections raised to Thessalon
lans, Phillpplans, Colosslans and Philemon
are set aside. Penan thinks they are Paul's
own. He Inclines to admit a Pauline
foundation for Epheslans, though Its style,
speculative Ideas and even specific admo
nitions are other than Paul elsewhere
MISS NORA
employs. The two epistles to Timothy
and the epistle to Titus he rejects as
apocryphal.
The critical achievement of this monu
mental work of Renan Is the evidence he
unfolds as to the division of the early
church. With relentless logic and evidence
drawn from wide and profound research
he reconstructs the stupendous body of
envy, detraction, open opposition, insid
ious undermining and secretly instigated
persecution Paul was obliged to suffer at
the hands of the Jndaistic, circumcision
school of Jerusalem Christians, at whose
head like a modern pope, was James,
brother of the Lord, and with which Pe
ter was more or less affiliated. After
reading this explanation of the condition
of the early church, many things hith
erto mysterious become clear, particular
ly the hostile reterenccs to Paul In the
writings of James and John, and espe
cially in the Apocalypse, and the com
plaints so frequent in Paul's undoubted
epistles, of open opposition and secret con
spiracy that were directed at his mis
sions. The Imperfections of Paul's char
acter are also clearly drawn, and it Is
only after apprehending them that we are
able to understand the true greatness
of his wonderful character, the obstacles,
as it were, over which his high ideals
and unfaltering purpose had to make
their way. Let us recall the passage In
which Renan, after paying his tribute to
Paul's greatness and nobility, shows how
far, nevertheless, he Is behind the Mas
ter himself:
The Son of God fltands alone. To appear for
a moment, to reflect a soft and profound efful
gence, to die very young, Is the life of a God.
To struggle, dispute and conquer, is the life
of a man. After having been for three cen
turies, thanks to orthodox Protestantism, the
Christian teacher par excellence, Paul sees in
our day his reign drawing to a clcse. Jesus,
on the contrary, lives mors than ever. It Is r.o
longer the epistle to the Romans that Ib the
resume of Christianity it is the Sermon on the
Mount. True Christianity, which will last for
ever, comes from the gospels, not from the
epistles of Paul . . . Paul is the father of
the subtle Augustine, of the unfruitful Thomas
Aquinas, of the gloomy Caivlnlst, of the peev
ish Jaupenlst, of the fierce theology that damns
and predestinates to damnation. Jesus is the
father of all those who seek repose for their
soulsin dreams of the ideal. What makes Chris
tianity live, is the little that wc know of the
word and person of Jesus. The ideal man, the
divine poet, the great artist, alone defy time
and revolutions. They alone are seated at the
right hand of God the Father for evermore.
St. Paul: by Ernest Eenan; translated from the
French by IngersoU Lockwood. Kew Tork: G.
W. Dillingham & Co.
Browning, Man and Poet.
As in the volume on Tennyson, so in
"Browning, Poet and Man," Miss Eliza
beth Luther Cary has shown excellent
judgment and literary skill in the selec
tion and arrangement of material. Brown
ing has suffered from the enthusiasm of
his friends, who have tried to read deep
meanings into some of his poems, ard
have thus hedged his work around with
an air of mystery that has repellejl rather
than attracted the average reader of po
etry. Miss Cary deprecates this and
urges that Browning's poetry be read like
that of other poets, not as a task, but
for pleasure. She ha6 laid more stress
upon criticisms by others than upon her
personal views. She says the range is
wide from those who think no jot or tit
tle of his work shall pass away to those
who claim permanence for only the com
paratively few poems that leap with vi
tality. "In a general survey of Brown
ing's work," says Miss Cary, "we find it,
then, consistent throughout with his first
preoccupation, the study of minds; In
spired by one ethical impulse, to preach
discontent with low or tarns ideals; but
changing steadily from poetry toward
prose, as he became wiser, and more ac
curate and less moved by emotion."
"There never was a decade after ISiO."
says Miss Cary, in conclusion, "when
Browning was not recognized by the ad-
judicatorsof letters as a stimulating in
fluence In literature." (G. P. Putnam's
Sons, New York.)
Story of American Expansion.
In "The Territorial Acquisitions of the
United States," Edward Bicknell has
gathered into compact and readable shape
tho story of our national growth from the
Louisiana purchase to the annexation of
Hawaii and the Spanish islands. Mr.
Bicknell does not attempt to say any
thing new but he has arranged in handy
form data that is interesting at this
time. Of Oregon the author says, among
other things:
Oregon la the one addition to our domain
which has come to us by discovery and occupa
tion, but even then a treaty with Great Brit
ain was required to make the title secure with
out possible bloodshed. Oregon also reminds us
that wo are a young country in the Kew World,
for it is since the "United States came into ex
istence that whito men explored the great river
flowing through that territory and settled on
Oregon soil.
Mr. Bicknell suggests that it was the
impending war with Mexico which caused
President Polk to back down In the
"Fifty-four-forty" contention, and com
promise with Great Britain at the 49th par
allel. The volume contains an appendix
with a table showing the area and popu
lation of the various acquisitions, the
population at the time of annexation and
the states carved from the territory, a
table showing the . comparative area of
the same acquisitions with the areas of
European countries, and a taole showing
the population of the United States as
VXXXE.
compared 'with that of the leading Euro
pean nations. (Small, Maynard & Co.,
Boston.)
NAVAL BATTLE IN FICTION.
Magazines of the Month and Various
Other Publications.
The fight between the Merrlmac and the
Monitor is utilized by Charles Eugene
Banks and George Cram Cook in a ro
mantic novel entitled "In Hampton
Roads." There Is a good deal of treason
in tho volume, and the reader will fol
low with interest the fortunes of Vir
ginia Eggleston, condemned to be shot as
a spy. (Rand, McNally & Co., Chicago.)
The following books have been received
from Herbert S. Stone & Co., Chicago:
"Was It Right to Forgive?" by Aml.a
E. Barr, a domestic romance in which
love conquers all. The characters are
well drawn and none is overly wicked.
"A Widow and Some Spinsters," a collec
tion of short stories by Maria. Louise
Pool. "The Human Interest; a Study In
Incompatibles," by Miss Vio!et Hunt. The
Interest centers in an English woman who
has longings for intellectual life, which
she does not find In Newcastle. "My
Father and I," by Countess Rullga. An
account of the beautiful sympathy exist
ing between a gifted woman and her
father, whose companion she had been
from chilhood. "Scoundrels & Co., Lim
ited." by Coulson Kernahan. The scoun
drel have a murderous Eyndlcate which
the hero joins for tho purpose of frustrat
ing criminal plans. The story Is of the
genuine blood and thunder order.
"Some Experiences of an Irish R M.,"
by E. OE. Somerville and Martin Ross,
is a collection of 12 stories of Irish life.
The stories were originally published in
ths Badminton Magaz ne. Longmans,
Green & Co., New York.)
"Home Pork Making," by A. W. Fulton,
commercial editor of American Agricul
turist and Orange Judd Farmer, is a com
plete guide for the farmer, the country
butcher and the suburban dweller, m all
that pertains to hog slaughtering, curing,
preserving and storing pork products.
(Orange Judd Co., Now York.)
The January Woman's Home Companion
contains many articles of special literary
I value, chief among which is a masterly
j discussion of "The Revival of Art and
Beauty," by Dr. Newell Dwight Hlllis.
Carina Campbell Eaglesfleld, under the
title "Balanced Men," makes a plea for a
more symmetrical manhood in this day of
specialization.
Thirty-two authors, 10 illustrators and
eight photographic artists contribute to
the January issue of tho Ladles' Home
Journal. Among the special features are
"The Home-Comlng of tho Nakannies,"
by W. A. Fraser; "The Boer Girl of South
Africa," by Howard C. Hillegas; "The
Mother of the Stars," by Amelia H. Bots
ford; "A National Crime at the Feet of
American Parents," by Edward Bok;
"The Minister and the Organ," by Ian
Maclarcn.
The "New Lipplncott" for January be
gins the year with a complete novel, full
pf fresh sensations and amusing episodes,
called "The Bread Line," by Albert Bige
low Paine. This is a tale of fnn and love
in New York's Bohemia, beginning with
New Year's night at the Model bakery, on
Broadway, where some comrades encoun
ter "The Bread Line," and ending there,
after a year spent in trying to start a
newspaper in a Bohemian studio. Love
plays a signal part in redeeming the
hero.
Governor Roosevelt begins in the Janu
ary Scribner's his monograph on "Oliver
Cromwell," which is to be a feature of
the magazine for six months. An article
of great significance at this time is Fred
erick Palmer's view of "White Man and
Brown Man In the Philippines." J. M,
Barrie's novel, "Tommy and Grizel,"
upon which ho has been at work for four
years, begins in this number with the ar
rival of Tommy in London with hl3 sister,
J Elspeth, and marks him as a writer who
Buaaemy acquires ceieurny.
What Dolls Think.
It Is true we're stuffed with snwduat
And can never learn to walk;
It Is true we have no organs
And can never learn to talk;
It is true we're only dollies
And dollies must remain,
But we'ro free frcm faults and folllea
That might cause our mammas pain.
Can yon tell us when you ever
Saw our -faces spoiled with frowns?
And we're sure you never heard us
Make a fuss about our gowns!
Then, we do not tease the kitty,
We are always kind In play;
And we think Uwould be a pity
For a doll to disobey!
When the parlor clock strikes seven
Not a fretful word is said
As our little mammas tell us
It is time to go to bed.
Bo, you see, though we are dollies,
And dollies must remain,
"We arc free from faults and follies
That mieht cause our mammas pain.
Helen A. Walker in Our Little Folks.
JACK AND THE PORCUPINE
Qanrrelsome Little Fox Terrier Who
Received a Lesson "Which He Did
Not Immediately Forjret.
Jack was a very quarrelsome little. fox
terrier not ill-natured, either, but so vain
that he wanted to fight every dog, even
those 10 times his size, that he met. And
when the mastiffs and Newfoundlands,
after whom he ran, snarling and growling,
walked away with sniffs of contempt,
Jack, In his vanity, thought they were
afraid of him. To be sure, he had one
good lesson the day he came home lame
and bleeding as the result of a quarrel.
What a pitiable, yet comical sight he was
later, bandaged all except one eye, and
unable even to wag his stump of a tail,
as a sign of thankfulness for what was
done to make him more comfortable. But
this happened in the middle of winter,
and had been forgotten by summer, when
he left Portland for the mines.
It was at the mines that Jack had
his first experience in living with other
dogs. A most disagreeable companion did
he prove, always claiming the right to lie
on the only cougar-skin mat In the cabin
and to snatch the choicest morsel from
every plate of food. When Towner and
Rover, the other dogs, tried to drive him
away, they were sure to hear a stern
voice ordering them to behave. For, you
see, people very seldom thought what a
nuisance Jack was, but only that he was
smaller than the other dogs and needed
to be protected against them.
Jnclc and the Porcupine.
One day, Mr. Frost, Jack's owner, was
sitting on a stump outside the cabin,
cleaning a gun, when a joyful bark that
he knew sounded from up the canyon.
"The little scamp's tracked a gopher,"
he said to himself; but when, a few sec
onds later, the "little scamp" gave a howl
of pain, he put down the gun and started
for the canyon. What he cams upon was
a sorry-looking fox terrier, whining and
lying flat on its back, as" it used its fore
paws in an endeavor to pull out quills
that stuck out all over him. Near by,
rolled into a ball, its spines standing on
end, was a porcupine, which turned
around with a pig-like movement and a
queer little grunt, at Mr. Frost's appear
ance. ("Pore" Is the French word for
hog, and some people think porcupines get
their name from their plg-llke move
ments.) Jack's pride came back when he saw
his master and when, which was of more
consequence, he observed the dogs which
had followed to s,ee what all the trouble
was about. Rover looked at Towser and
Towser looked at Rover, when they saw
what the little dunce was going to do, and
if ever dogs laugh, they very wickedly
did so, when Jack charged straight for
the bristling mass, near at hand. Any dog
that knows anything at all about such
things, understands that the very best
thing to do with a porcupine is to leave
It alone, and that the next best thing
la to catch hold of Its nose.
What a howling there was when Jack
fell upon the quills and, worst of all,
could not get himself off them.
Porcupine Mttlces His Escape.
"Well, I hope you're . satisfied," Mr!
Frost said, thinking how anxious Jack'
had been to fight with whatever was more
dangerous-looking than himself. Never
theless he pulled the fox terrier away from
the porcupine, which quickly laid down
its armor and moved away in search of
a hid:ng-place.
To Jack's credit, it must bo said that he
bore bravely the pain of having the qul'.ls
pulled out, one by one. Even Rover and
Towser, much as thev disliked him, had
to respect the grit he showed in never
whining during the process.
And Jack lemembered the lesson. He
stayed at the mines a year longer, and
during that time he saw plenty of -porcu-
pines, though not, you may be sure, be
cause he hunted them, up. When he
did find one accidentally, he would quietly
slink away, without stopping for a second
look, and nothing on earth would induce
him to remain. He had changed his mind
about the desirability of attacking every
thing running on four legs.
INTELLIGENCE OF BEES.
Aro They Able to TnTIs in Some Man
ner. 'With Each Other.
You all know, boys and, girls, that the
queen bee in every well-regulated hive is
an object of solicitude to all working bees
of tho busy community. Well, to ascer
tain how far this Interest Is carried, a
natural philosopher, one Huber by name,
whom all scientific people havo heard of,
ventured upon a little experiment one day.
Watching his opportunity, he stealthily
abstracted a queen bee from Its hive, and
then awaited developments. For half an
hour or so the loss seemed not rb have been
noticed by the other bees, but a progres
sive Increasing buzz of agitation gradually
announced the growing alarm, until short
ly the whole hive was in an uproar, and
Us busy occupants were seen pouring forth
their legions in search of their lost mon
arch, or eager to avenge, with their stings,
the insult offered to their sovereign. On
restoring the captured queen to her sub
jects, with equal secrecy, the tumult
speedily subsided, and the ordinary busi
ness of the community was resumed, as
before the occurrence.
That In this case Information, and that
of a complex character, was transmitted
by one insect to another, there can be lit
tle doubt, but how Is a question the scien
tists are stil puzzling over.
It Is thought that ants and bees, which
cross their antennae with those of other
bees or ants which they may meet, may
in this manner communicate information of
concern. If this be so, it would indicate a
very superior order of Intelligence among
these Insects, and It might account for
what happened In the removal from, and
return to, the hive of the queen bee, in the
instance which has been related.
"THE PRINCE'S FEATHER."
Very Jolly Parlor Game for Either
Big: or Little Folk.
Here's a jolly game, and there's lots of
fun to be got out of it by young or old
if the rules are adhered to. It is not new,
but then very few parlor games are, and,
lfko as not, you have let It pass from your
mind, if you have ever played it. If you
haven't, it Is, just the same, worth playing.
It is called "The Prince's Feather."
The hostess, big or little, unfolds a good
sized table-cover, or sheet, which she bids
everybody to catch hold of at corners or
sides, and stretch out, so that it will make
a large surface. Then she blows a very
light and downy feather ("the prince's
feather") into the air over the cloth and
Instructs all present to keep It moving
with their breath, and to be very careful
MADE SOME
Mamma Why do you cry, my dear? You have a chocolate letter as well a3 sister.
Ida Tea, but her name's Marie! Fidele Bl aetter.
not to allow It to pass .them by, and not
to let go the cloth. .
The player who fails to blow back tho
feather when It comes his way must give
up hl3 hold upon the sheet and stand be
hind his right-hand neighbor until, by good
fortune, he gets another blow at the
feather. Then he may be reinstated and
the player in front of him must stand be
hind. If ho lets It pass him a second time,
he is condemned to "dungeon" until tho
game is over. As the players, one by one.
go to dungeon, the cover grows smaller,
and tha final contest between the very last
players become? very lively and strenu
ous. Sometimes the company "choose up" as
for a spelling match, and stand in two
opposing lines. The feather is wafted by
Japanese fans back and forth. The side
which wafts the prince's feather above or
V js 'flSllflV JteW"r' jr
through the enemy's line wins a prisoner
and a worker from the other side. The
rule is that every one jhuat fight valiantly
for the side upon which he happens to
be, and there is a lively scramble to see
which leader shall whi the largest number
upon hi3 side and wear the prince's feather
as a trophy of- war. This is a time game,
and the hostess should see that tho time
keeper is strict in hla reckoning and 'de
clares the game ended at the exact mo
ment agreed upon.
SOMETHING WORTH KNOWING.
Don't Walk PIccon-Toed, Bovr
Lcerareu. or Knoelc-Kneed, Lads.
.A large number of boys are Inclined to
be "pigeon-toed," and many of them spend
years in learning to "toe out" after tha
most approved fashion. The pigeon walks
over its feet, rolling like a sailor often;
but most boys walk with their feet straight
ahead, or a bit Inclined in, after the man
ner of the Indian. If you are pigeon-toed
you may improve the conduct of your feat
by following these directions, according
fn the phtlnflelnhla Inoulrer. which has
been looking into the matter for the benefit.
of youngsters afflicted with the uniortu
nate habit:
Seat yourself in a chair of the proper
height, so that both feet will rest easily
upon the floor. Place the heels together,
or as close as the cuVvature will permit;
fchen, without,, separating or moving the
knees, turn the left foot outward as far
as possible, without moving the heel from
SCHOOL TAKES A RECESS.
Bruin Yes. children, you may
its position. Next make the same move
ment with the right foot and then with
both feet, moving them, of course, in op
posite directions. Try also raising both
feet from the floor, holding them straight
In front, with tha knees straight. Then
rotate the feet upon the ankles In opposite
directions.
For bow legs take this, exercise: Stand
erect, heels together; then, without turn
ing the feet over or moving them In any
way, contract the muscles of the knees so
that they are pulled Inward. This same
exercise, reversed, so that the knees are
DIFFERENCE.
drawn outward literally, Is efficacious for
straightening knock knees. Practiced
faithfully, these exercises will surely help
i you. Another good oxerclse for bow legs
j Is to stand with the feet slightly apart
; on a horizontal line, then, by exercising
the musoles of the knees, draw the feet
j together. This must bo done on a smooth
I floor.
I Boar these directions In ralr.d, children,
i for It i3 not nice to ba pigeon-toed, bow-
legged or knock-kneed.
Cat Turned Bellrlngrer.
The following story of a cat, which is
published In the Philadelphia Inquirer,
! Is vouched for by no less a personage
j than an archishop. He says:
; "A cat lived for many years In my
1 mother's family, and its feats of sagacity
Nw York World.
were wtnessed by her, my slstera and my
self. It was known, not merely once or
twice, but habitually to ring the parlor
bell whenever It wished tho door to be
opened. Soma alarm was excited on the v
first occasion that it turned tho bell-ringer.
Tho family had retired to rest, and
In the middle of the nlsht the parlor
bell was rung violently. The sleepers
wero startled from their respose. and
proceeded, downstairs, with pokers and
tongs, to Interrupt, as they thought, the
predatory motives of soma burglar; but
they were agreeably surprised to discover
that the bell had. been rung by pussy,
who repeated the act whenever she want
ed to get out of the parlor."
H1j Al?nment Convincing.
A boy was caught in the act of .stealing
dried berries in front of a store the other
day,, and was locked up in a dark closet
by the grocer. Then the boy commenced
begging most pathetically to be released,
and, after using all the persuasion that his
young Imagination could invent, proposed:
"Now. if you'll let me out and send for
my daddy, he'll pay you for the berries,
and lick me besides!" This appeal was
too much for the grocery man to stand
out against, and he let the youngster out.
Philadelphia Inquirer.
"When "Were Yon Born!
According to Combe, boys born in tha
months of Septembor. October. Novem
ber, December. January and February are
not so tall as those born in other months.
have a holid ay today. Type
Those born in November are the short
est. Girls, according to the same au
thority, born in December. January, Feb
ruary. March, April and May show a less
length of body than those born In the re
maining months. Those born from Juno
to November aro taller, but the tallest
are born In August. To some extent these
facts are attributed to economic condi
tions, for a child born In summer ha3
generally better food and air.
Ice Cream Volcano.
A wonderful funnyland sight
Is a mountain of marvelous height;
But you never could guess
What happens unless
Tou were there upon Saturday nght.
When the sun In the west Is agtow.
The whole mountain rumbles, and. lot
It pour3 out a stream
Of asoortad Icecream,
By the banks Where the maearoeno grew.
Then from city and country and town,
Tho children of king and of clown
All run with their spoons.
And they pick macaroono.
. And they eat till they have to He dewn.
But the thing that the children adere
Is a mountain that stands by the shore.
With a cratery pot
Where moIasse Keeps hot.
With trickles of taffy galore.
Sometimes it rains popcorn at night.
And alt of the kernels that light
On the mountain top, pop.
And they hop. and they drop.
Till the top of the mountain is whiter
And corn balls roll down
To the edge, of the town.
While the children dance round with deMght.
Albert W. Smith. In Ladles Home Jeurnal.
Only a. Little Gray Mouse.
I'm only a little gray raoice;
I live In the wall of your house.
And when you're asleep from my hole I do
creep.
And scamper all over tho house.
I'm sure that you're all very kind.
And I'm perfectly sure you don't mrad
When I nibble your cheese and eat all I
pleads.
And do all the mischief I find.
I'm glad that you haven't a cat.
For I'm growlns uncommonly fat:
I go to the shelf and just help myself.
And I take a great pleasure in thai.
Although you may think me a pest,
I assure you It's all for the best;
What you'd do wltheut me I really can't see.
So forgive me for all I've confessed.
In the night when you're all fast aeleef).
Out In the darkness I creep,
When there's nobody near and nothing te tear.
I frolic and scamper and squeak.
I scamper about until dawn.
In the earliest hours of morn;
Tour footsteps I hear, and aa they draw near
I whisk down my hole and am gose.
E. M. Ware (aged 13). In X. Y. Herald.
Yoathfal Trumpeter Shnrlock.
Trumpeter John James Shuslock, of the
Fifth (Royal Irish) lancers, although but
16 years of age. Is out on active service,
and distinguished himself by shooting
down three Boers, one after another, with
his revolver, at the battle of Eland'3
laagte.
Trumpeter Shurlock joined the lancers
at Canterbury on August Si. 1S97, at tho
age of 14. and proceeded to South Africa
In February. 1S9S. Hist father served In
the same regiment before him, while his
mother Is the daughter of Sergeant John
Froggott, a gallant soldier, who served
his country for 21 years, and who saved
the life of a drowning officer near the
Rock of Gibraltar.
Enlsrma.
My first Is in Bohemia, not Francer
My second Is embraced by Ophelia, not Hamlet;
My third is in both early and late;
My fourth Is found In warrior, ne dandy;
My fifth Is In both stolid and steady;
My whole Is a people become famous In war,
not peace.
There's JTothincr New.
Ancient Egypt boasted a "penny-In-the-slot"
machine, while one explorer found
In the ruins of NInevah a kind of magni
fying glass, and nearly 4000 years ago the
Egyptians and Assyrians observed stars
through a primitive telescope.
JSIarjorlc and the Incandescent Ligrlit
Marjorle, S years old and from tha coun
try, looked bllnkingly at an incandescent
light for the first time. "Why. mamma.
it looks just like a white plncushton; see
tho needles and pins sticking out all
round." Chicago Times-Herald.
Daisy and Her Piano.
Uncle gave a pretty toy
Piano to little Daisy;
And little Daisy, In her Joy.
Is driving the family crazy.
Chlcazo Tribune