March 6, 2019
Page 13
O PINION
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America’s Worst Nightmare since Watergate
A president
spouting false
claims
t om h. h astings
Our national em-
barrassment.
Our
national emergency.
There he is, residing
for a minute in the
White House, a minute that is the
longest lucid American nightmare
since Watergate.
The day is not complete until
Trump has lied to the American
people and the world, until he’s
insulted any and all critics even
when those critiques are deliber-
ative and strictly evidence-based,
and even when they are people
nearly universally respected, even
revered.
Ruth Bader Ginsberg? Justin
Trudeau? Really? Toss in some
misogynist identity slurs, sever-
al braggart malignant narcissis-
tic self-congratulating ridiculous
claims—even managing to com-
bine them with insulting Samuel
L. Jackson—and a few gaslighting
redundancies and there isn’t much
left on the Trump list of abusive
things to do today.
Brilliant. A waddling, braying,
tweeting embarrassment to any
by
and all critical thinking, fact-reli-
ant Americans.
My colleague and I do work-
shops, sometimes for visiting for-
eign professionals. Almost no
matter their country or coun-
tries of origin, I lead with a
sincere apology for the Dear
Leader who lost the popular
vote but still managed to get
installed in the most powerful
office on Earth.
American white man. It gets us off
on the right foot.
Now comes journalists from
some dozen countries, mostly Eu-
ropean but a few from the Middle
East and one from Asia. None of
us have ever met each other.
I open with an apology for
slights, for insults, for mortifying
misstatements and unwarranted
UN laughingstock braggadocio
emanating from the old white guy
Last week we saw a grifter lawyer,
Michael Cohen, turn state’s evidence
against his former boss—and even though
Cohen, as Trump’s lawyer, was a serial
liar, he presented Congress with actual
forensic evidence that Trump committed
felonies, not just in the past, but while in
office. Shades of Spiro Agnew.
Here comes a roomful of Ken-
yan National Police. I apologize
for obvious reasons. Most Ameri-
cans have likely forgotten Trump’s
repugnant comment about African
“sh—hole” countries. I assure you
that Kenyans and other Africans
absolutely have not. They appre-
ciate a genuine apology from an
who just seems verbally inconti-
nent and whose thumbs seem to
have zero impulse control, man-
aging to praise dictators and vili-
fy popular democratic leaders as
a matter of course—not to men-
tion his incessant juvenilia about
all manner of journalists, from
the Wall Street Journal to Katie
Couric, for goshsakes.
Last week we saw a grift-
er lawyer, Michael Cohen, turn
state’s evidence against his former
boss—and even though Cohen, as
Trump’s lawyer, was a serial liar,
he presented Congress with actu-
al forensic evidence that Trump
committed felonies, not just in the
past, but while in office. Shades of
Spiro Agnew.
My father was a psychologist,
not I, but clearly, Trump’s claims
of fake news are what psychol-
ogists call projection. I attest to
my own profound confusion at
his clumsy hate speech and utter
cultural incompetence and frank-
ly, negotiating fails despite his
blowhard boasts and his fake au-
tobiography—his next memoir:
How to Be a Rotten Role Model
for American Youth and the Great
Big Butt of International Jokes.
My wincing and shaking head let
them know that I’m fully as con-
founded as I am certain they are.
This is what it means to be an
American dealing with a fake
president spouting cringeworthy
claims even as we try to create de-
cent relationships with bewildered
people from other lands.
Tom H. Hastings is from Port-
land. He is director of PeaceVoice
and on occasion an expert witness
for the defense in court.
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